Traveller
by texjay
Summary: A woman decides to change her life completely. Stars a chunk of the WWE roster, esp. Taker
1. Chapter 1

I'm not splitting this into Smackdown and Raw. Because it's fiction and I can.

Disclaimer: I own nothing connected with the WWE, its employees or stars. I only own the original characters in this story. No money is being made from this story which is being written purely for personal enjoyment, and no copyright infringement is intended.

You know, it's strange. To this day, I'm still not really sure how or why I ended up here. I mean, I know what happened but that's it. I know I love it, but that's another story.

It all started the year I turned thirty. I was stuck in a dead end job I hated, overweight and in a bland marriage. It was like a bolt from the blue the day I realised that, if I didn't do something about it, I was going to live out my life forever stuck in this void.

So I changed my life around. First I got rid of the weight. Got fit. Now, I'm no beauty queen. Not an out and out dog, at least not now anyway. I stand five foot five and my hair is boring brown. Most of the time anyway. I'll never be a skinny little thing. I'm too stocky. Not fat, but stocky. So I went for building a bit of muscle instead.

The next thing I junked was the job. The husband got pretty pissed about it, so he was the last thing to go. We sold everything we owned and I decided to get away. Go somewhere new, make a whole new start.

So I emigrated.

The USA has always fascinated me. Especially Texas. I don't know why, but hell, there you go. So I hauled ass to the Lone Star state. I had absolutely no idea when still in England what I was going to do, where to go. I settled on Houston in the end. Why? The last programme I saw on TV before I booked the flight was Animal Cops Houston. Pretty sappy, huh? I have some family out in the States so I managed to get a visa.

I got there safely, found a place to rent, all the normal stuff you have to do in a new place. I had some money put behind me from selling everything in the UK, so decided to do some travelling before I settled down into the old nine to five here in the US.

The tour was fun. I saw a lot of great places. Where I ended up though was a complete accident. I was supposed to be going to JFK airport. There was some problem, fog or something like that, so we landed at White Plains instead. Ever since starting this whole thing, I've been a little adventurous so I decided to take myself off from there and ended up in Stamford. I spent a couple of days wandering around before picking up a local paper to flick through. I have this strange obsession with job ads. Wherever I am, even on holiday, I'll look through them. This time I found an interesting one.

Travelling liaison officer wanted. Duties include organising large groups of people travelling throughout US and internationally. Skills needed – ability to use initiative and good organisational skills. PR background preferred.

I don't know why, but it caught my attention straight away. OK, I had no actual PR experience but I have done a bit of most things in my time, including face-to-face sales. I decided 'What the hell!' and rang the number. The closing date for applications was the next day, so I slipped into an internet café and re-jigged my CV, before e-mailing it to the address the woman had given me, giving my cell phone number as a contact. It meant staying for a few more days than I had planned but, then again, I had nothing much to rush home for.

I couldn't believe it when I got a call two days later asking me to go for an interview the following day. I had to rush out to buy something to wear.

I'm one of those people who are pathologically early for any appointments. That's why I got to the address I was given half an hour before I was due. When I saw the building I just stopped and stared. There it was, a huge building, and on the front a corporate logo I recognised immediately. The two Ws, one inside the other. I was that shocked I checked the address five times. When I had rung before, the person had just answered with a name. No company, just their name.

I hung around just round the corner until twenty minutes before my appointment time, and then went inside. I was whisked away to a plush corridor and sat on a comfy chair until the door opened. The woman that walked out was gorgeous. Absolutely gut churningly beautiful.

"Ms Baron, come through please." I took a deep breath and stood, smoothing down my skirt, and followed the efficient looking woman into the office.

I hate those psychoanalytical tests they make you take. I'm always convinced that I'll come out looking like some kind of maniac. We talked about why I felt that I would be the right person for the job. I told her about my newly discovered love of travelling, and the fact that I would love to see the world. I like working with people. I am pretty organised – my ex-husband used to say I would make lists of lists I needed to make. That's why it was so unbelievable to everyone that I just took off as quickly as I did.

No more information was forthcoming about the job. I came out of that interview not being too hopeful. At least they told me I would know in two days, so I didn't have to stay in Stamford too much longer.

To say I was amazed when I got offered the job would be a huge understatement. I'm just glad I was sitting down. Definitely not coming up as a psycho on those tests. Everything happened so quickly from there. I got called back in to have the job explained fully.

It had been decided by the higher powers that as much as possible all the travelling for the WWE superstars should be arranged centrally. My job was to travel with them and make sure that everybody got to their flights on time, that the hotel rooms had been booked correctly, that kind of thing. Basically I had to sort it out if anything went wrong. Lost luggage, lost wrestler, car rental problems, anything like that. Oh, and I flew out with them in four days.

Those next few days were completely manic. I did a lot of shopping. I had been travelling fairly light round the country. I called my landlord to let him know what was going on. The rent came out of the bank automatically, so he was happy enough I guess. Luckily all of my bills were paid in the same way, so I didn't have too much to worry about.

The day before I left to pick up with the stars, I was given the detailed itinerary of where we were going, and who exactly was going where. There was also a new cell phone so that anyone could get hold of me if necessary.

It really took me a couple of months to settle into the job. There was often a problem like there was a hotel room short, or a bag had gone missing. It could be interesting at times trying to get everyone out to catch their flights, and the ring rats were frequently a pain in the butt. I thought at first that the divas would be the problem. I'll admit I hadn't been looking forward to working with them as I anticipated them really behaving like divas, but on the whole they were OK. No, it was the guys who could be a problem. I think the worst was when my phone rang at three o clock in the morning. After that, it all seemed to go downhill quickly for a while.

"'Lo?" I blinked blearily at the clock beside the bed. It was quiet for a few seconds.

"We're lost." It was easy to tell that the person was drunk. I groaned quietly.

"Who's there?"

"Me." Very original. I racked my brains trying to work out who it was. It finally came to me. Edge. I find it easier on the whole to refer to them by their professional names. There are some exceptions.

"OK, who else?"

"Amy, John, Kurt." He spoke slowly and in my mind's eye there was a picture of him spinning round slowly, pointing to each of them in turn.

"Why did you call me?" I knew I was whining, but couldn't help it.

"No-one else would answer their phone." So, I'm a mug who never switches her phone off. "We can't remember the name of the hotel." Honestly, head meet wall. Several times. After getting him to describe to me where they were, I pulled on some clothes quickly and went down to reception. The night concierge called a taxi for me, and we headed for the bar they had named.

They were a pretty sorry sight when we pulled up beside them. Sat on a bench outside this bar. Amy was asleep and the other three were sitting there cross-eyed with drink. Quickly bundling them into the cab, our pitiful party went back to the hotel. After depositing them into the right rooms, I made it back to my room and crashed on the bed. The clock read five fifteen. I had to get up in forty-five minutes and knew I would never get back to sleep. Sighing, I pulled myself back up and got in the shower.

Just over an hour later, I was ticking names off the list as people got in the cars to go to the airport. I couldn't help a small chuckle as the four from earlier that morning winced and groaned their way past me. The feeling of sympathy didn't last too long. I was absolutely shattered myself.

Finally it looked like everyone had passed through. I did a quick scan of the list to double check, pausing when I came to a line that hadn't been checked. Looking across to see who it was, I froze.

Obviously most of these guys are big. And some can be quite intimidating. Some are temperamental and require careful handling at times. Dave Batista for instance has a foul temper sometimes, although he is usually OK. One of them, quite frankly, scared the hell out of me. And no prize for guessing that it was him that hadn't shown.

Of course, I had loved watching him wrestle for years. He had always been one of my favourites in fact. But in the flesh, I found him more than a little overwhelming. Sure, Big Show is bigger, but very easygoing. This guy, well, I hadn't had anything to do with him and liked it that way.

Frowning to myself, I went to reception and checked with them. He hadn't been seen. Taking a deep breath, I realised that there was nothing for it. I was going to have to fetch him. Reluctantly, I got in an elevator and headed for his room.

Standing outside the door, I took another deep breath before glancing at my watch. Time was running out and there could be no more stalling. Trying to stop my hands shaking, I knocked on the wood. There was no reply. Knocking again, I called out as well.

"Taker?" Still nothing from inside the room. "Mr Calaway?" Now convinced that he wasn't there, I thumped the door. "God damn it, where are you?" Five seconds later, the door was wrenched open. Falling back a step, I took in the broad chest stood right in front of me and gulped.

"What do you want?" he growled.

"Uh, well…" I stammered. He crossed his arms in front of that huge chest and looked at me. "You're going to miss the flight," I managed to force out eventually. "All the others have gone already."

"Yeah, well, I'm not ready." He turned away from me, striding back through the room. I stayed frozen where I was. That was the closest I had ever been to him, and it just made it worse. To be brutally honest, he terrified me. However, I had to do my job and get him to the next place.

"Er, would you like me to try and get you on a later flight?" He grunted. Taking that as a yes, I dug out the flight information and called to see what I could sort out. After hanging up the call, I stepped back to the still open door and knocked again. Hearing muffled swearing, I gathered the courage to take two steps inside the door and cleared my throat.

"Well?" He came into my field of vision suddenly from the side and I jumped. I swear my feet nearly left the ground.

"Oh! Er, I got you on the two o clock flight." Damn, now I was blushing. That always happens to me. I colour up at the drop of a hat.

He nodded. "Well, you'd better run along then. Don't want to miss the flight yourself now, do ya?"

"Actually, I'm on the afternoon flight as well."

"Fallin' down on the job already?" He chuckled, although it soon stopped. The flash of normal seeming behaviour startled me.

"No, I just have something personal I need to sort out, and I've arranged Tara to cover the other end of this flight. Oh!" How to sound intelligent, huh? I was not normally this dense sounding, but he affected me like that. Realising what I'd forgotten I stepped back outside the door to ring Tara and let her know that she would be missing one on that flight. As I pressed the 'end' button on the phone I glanced back over my shoulder into the room. Taker was just standing in the middle of the floor, seemingly staring at nothing.

I've always been one of those people that hate to see others in any kind of pain. I suppose it was that part of me that turned me around and stepped back into that room. I don't remember doing it, but suddenly I was standing in front of him.

"Are you OK?" His attention was jerked to my face when I spoke. That was the first time I really saw his eyes. Green, piercing and, at that moment, looking so very tired.

"What?" he mumbled quietly.

"You look worn out." Underneath that endless steady stare my nerves began to return. I was sure he was going to shout at me and my body tensed, ready to run away. Not a very professional thought, but very good for self-preservation.

He opened his mouth and I braced myself to get a mouthful of abuse. Like I said before, I had not had anything to do with him, apart from a quick hello at one point in passing. I have no idea why I was so scared. Well, that's not really true. With a lot of them, it's easy to separate the ring persona with the people they become outside. With him, I couldn't see past the hard man image. I didn't think there was anything but the hard man in there.

We stood there for a few seconds, his mouth open and my eyes screwed shut. Eventually he just sighed.

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"Oh." I risked opening one eye and saw his huge shoulders slump and his gaze return to the floor.

"How old do you think I am?" he burst out suddenly.

"Well, " I said, crossing my arms, "That would be a bit of a pointless question. I know you are forty, forty-one in March."

He turned away, but I still heard what he muttered. "Maybe I should retire."

"Retire? You? Why? You're still up there. Still popular. Still athletic enough."

He spun on his heels to face me and those eyes fixed on me again. Slowly he moved across the room and sank on the end of the bed. Staring blankly ahead he spoke reluctantly.

"My wife wants me to retire. Well, wanted, anyway. When I didn't want to, she threatened to divorce me. I got so sick of her talking about nothing else I filed the papers. Irreconcilable differences. She didn't contest it."

"I see," I replied quietly.

"What the hell do you mean, 'I see'".

I walked across the carpet and sat on the corner of the bed. I was feeling braver, but still stayed some distance away from him.

"Same reason as went on my divorce papers. Was it recent?"

"Six months." Ouch. That long and he was still in this kind of a state? "I don't want her back but…" It seemed he felt the urge to talk. I wasn't sure why he was talking to me, but maybe I was disconnected enough from the whole thing. Most of the other wrestlers had probably met his ex-wife, but I hadn't. He took a deep breath. "Ever since then I don't know what to do. How to move on. Maybe I am getting too old."

"Hey," I said brightly, "Stick one of those tattooed arms out the arena door one evening, you'll get just as many rats swarming round you as the other guys do." A helpless giggle left my throat as he rolled his eyes. "Seriously, you should try to have some fun. Kick back, relax and what happens, happens. I've been there."

That green glint shone from the corner of his eye as he looked at me. "What do you do for fun?"

"This," I replied, pointing at the stack of papers beside me on the bed. Trying unsuccessfully to smother a huge yawn I continued. "Rescuing lost, drunk wrestlers at three o clock in the morning. I'm sorry to cut and run, but if I don't get some coffee I'll never make it to my appointment, let alone onto that plane. See you, Taker."

"Mark," he said suddenly as he stood. I just stared at him dumbly. "My name is Mark. You might as well use it. See you on the plane?"

"I doubt it," I smiled as I picked up the papers from the bed. "Stars fly business class, staff fly coach."

Twenty minutes later, I was sitting in the hotel restaurant with my hands wrapped around the biggest coffee on the menu. My mind was freewheeling, and I found myself contemplating the colour green.

My appointment was a trip to a doctor. Over the past few years I've tried coming off the pill, but the mood swings are in no way worth it. My blood pressure was up, but I blamed the latte. After getting the prescription filled it was time to head to the airport.

The flight was three hours long, from San Diego to Seattle. After take-off, I'd just started to get settled with a book and some music when a stewardess approached me.

"Please collect all of your belongings and follow me." I did as I was asked, confused, and trotted along behind her up the plane. Swinging through a curtain, the plane suddenly seemed wider. So this was what business class looked like.

I was still confused as she led me further up towards the front of the cabin until the stewardess indicated with an arm that we had reached our destination. Stepping level with the seat I looked down and met green eyes again.

"Is there a problem?"

"Yeah. I'm bored." And then he grinned up at me. "Sit down and talk to me."

It wasn't something that had been listed on the job description, but then I supposed it came under the headings of preventing any problems if at all possible. I'll admit also to being curious about this man. He had been going through a tough time, which had probably made him seem far more intimidating. Although he was quite intimidating enough, just by the sheer size of him. That didn't get any less noticeable as I stowed my hand luggage and sank down onto the seat next to him. He plucked the paperback novel I had been reading out of my hand and glanced at the cover.

"Stephen King, Huh?"

"Yeah. My favourite author. So, what would you like to talk about, er…?"

"Mark," he prompted.

"Yeah, sorry." I felt the blush starting on my neck. "I'm still finding it quite hard. I've watched wrestling for years, and now I'm around all these people I've watched on TV. It's taking a bit of getting used to."

"Hmm," he rumbled. "So what was that earlier about rescuing lost wrestlers?" He seemed amused by the story and that grin surfaced again. "So what do you really do for fun? What do you like?"

"Well, I haven't had much time since I left the UK. I like fast bikes, big trucks and loud music. Horse riding, although I haven't had a go at western yet. Reading, movies. I'm game to have a go at pretty much anything." It was hard to ignore the raised eyebrow at that point, but I did my best. I really wanted to ask him some questions, but didn't feel brave enough. We sat in silence for a while, before Mark asked me another question.

"What does your man think about your job?"

I laughed. "No man. I don't have the time or the inclination." That eyebrow came up again.

"Your woman then?" My jaw dropped. Then I saw the little smirk he had on his face and realised he was teasing.

"That's not what I meant! Travelling so much means I don't have time to meet someone. And to be quite honest I have no interest in meeting Joe Ordinary. Been there. Most days I don't have to go too far to get some eye candy anyway." I stopped suddenly. I was obviously starting to relax in his company but still didn't want to embarrass myself.

"Eye candy?"

I shrugged, trying to pass it off as a casual comment. Mark tilted his head to one side. I had the feeling that whatever was coming could be a minefield for me. "So, who's your favourite wrestler then?"

Yep, there it was. Possibly the one question that was most awkward for me to answer honestly. In all my years as a fan of wrestling, Taker had been the one to get me shouting at the TV screen. If ever he was on, I'd get to watch the match come hell or high water. I thought quickly.

"Oh, you know, it changes all the time." A weak answer, I know but it was the best I could come up with on the spot.

"Right now."

"Well, purely as a fan… I've always had a bit of a soft spot for Shawn Michaels. He's usually the underdog as he's not so big. On the whole I prefer to watch the big powerful guys. Batista, Kane, big guys like that."

"Oof, I'm hurt."

"Yeah well, don't fret," I muttered. "You're on the list as well." A smug look spread across his face. I have never been so glad as I was then to hear my phone ring.

"Hey Tara. What's up?"

"Jade, we have a problem. There's a bag missing this end."

"Great. It would be when I'm not there. Uh, whose is it?"

"You won't like it. It's Dave Batista's."

"Please tell me it's not his favourite suit again? He went nuts last time."

"I'm afraid it is."

"OK, we're about two hours away. Can you get everyone off to the hotel, and tell him I'll sort it as soon as I get to the airport. I'm sorry Tara. I hoped this one would go smoothly." I pressed the end button and let my head fall back onto the seat.

"Problem?" came the deep voice from beside me.

"One of Batista's bags is missing. He's got a promo to film in the morning and I'll just bet he was planning on wearing that suit. That's the second time it's happened. He went nuts last time."

"Last time?"

"His bag went to Springfield Missouri instead of Springfield Illinois. It took a long time for my eardrums to recover from that. This time can only be worse." I looked over to see him flicking through the book of short stories I had been reading. Heaving a deep sigh, I continued. "I think that once this is sorted, I'm going to go to the hotel and sleep until it's time to get on the plane again."

He glanced up. "You not coming to the taping?"

"I don't very often. I'm planning on what is probably the longest hottest shower known to man, and then crashing out in front of the TV for the next couple of nights. And hoping desperately that no more people get drunk and lost!"

"When did you get divorced?" The change of subject threw me.

"About four months ago. It all came through a couple of weeks before I came over here."

"You don't seem too cut up about it."

"I'm not. It just didn't work."

"What was wrong with him?"

I considered for a moment. "Nothing. He was utterly perfect. Every mother's dream for a son-in-law. Never did a thing wrong. He was totally… nice."

"Doesn't sound like much of a problem."

My temper flared a bit as I heard echoes of my mother in what Mark was saying.

"Maybe there is something wrong with me then. But I don't like _nice_. Not all the time. He never challenged me. Everything could be sorted out reasonably. And sometimes I just like a good fight. Yelling, screaming, throwing things. But he was just so damn perfect that if I yelled at him my whole family would get on at me about it, telling me how lucky I was to have him, and I'd never find anyone else to put up with me. I had enough. I decided I could do better with my life, and set out to prove it." It was nearly a speech, and I felt a little embarrassed as I sat there regaining my breath. Mark sat back in his seat and watched me for a few seconds.

"A group of the guys will be going out for a drink tonight. Come out with us."

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

"Looks to me like you ain't getting much fun either. Come out and get to know them properly." I thought about it. In truth, it did get lonely in the evenings, stuck in a hotel room.

"OK." He smiled at me again.

"Meet us in the hotel lobby at eight."


	2. Chapter 2

The rest of the flight was fairly uneventful, apart from the fact that I couldn't get my book back. Resigning myself to having lost it, I put my earphones in and managed to catch an hour of sleep. That surprised me when I woke up. I was either relaxed, or completely exhausted. Or maybe both.

The seat belt light came on shortly after I woke. Putting my CD player back in my bag, I turned to retrieve my book from Mark. It had disappeared.

"Guess I'm lending that to you then." He just smirked a little as he buckled his seat belt.

I had discovered that I love flying, apart from the landings. That part always makes me nervous. The tunnel vision sets in from the time that belt is buckled to when I actually get off the plane. Once my feet were actually back on solid ground, I hurried off to try and sort out the missing bag. Suddenly I came to a grinding halt, like some kind of anchor had been thrown out behind me.

"Manners! I was talking to you."

"God, sorry. I was miles away. Do you need something?" I was firmly back into working mode.

"Interesting question." He pretended to think it over for a moment. "Nah, I was just going to remind you. Eight o clock, in the lobby."

"Sure. I'll see you later." Keen to get on, I headed towards the baggage claim area to get my stuff before trying to find Batista's. "Enjoy the book," I threw over my shoulder after a couple of strides.

The good thing about always being the one to do a job like this is that you soon learn who to talk to when something needs sorting out. Grabbing the phone I soon got hold on someone in the airline's customer relations department. The bag had turned up, but it was some way from where it was supposed to be. Some blatant grovelling on my part saw it being put on the next available flight into Seattle. It would just have to be picked up when the plane landed. And guess who would probably have to do it?

Despite having very good instructions of how to get to the hotel I managed to get a 'little bit' lost and had to stop for directions. After leaving a message for Dave Batista I headed for the elevator. Finally making it to my hotel room, I flopped onto the bed and flung my arm over my eyes. Raising my arm just enough to be able to see my watch, I groaned. It was seven thirty, and I was supposed to be downstairs for eight o clock.

For an instant I considered just crawling into bed and hiding my head under the pillow. However, the sad wrestling fan in me just couldn't let go and I hurled myself into the shower. Cursing the fact that I had decided to grow my hair long again, I dried it as quickly as I could, and dragged a pair of jeans, a T-shirt and some boots on. Dragging a brush through my misbehaving hair, I put it in a ponytail and headed downstairs. I exited the elevator and tried to stroll nonchalantly into the lobby.

"There you are!" I swung round to see who was talking. "Where's my stuff?" Batista strode in my direction, looking furious.

"Uh, it got mislabelled and went to Washington DC." I'd hoped to avoid this, hence leaving him a message.

"What fucking good is that to me? I need that stuff for in the morning!"

When I was growing up, I had an evil temper of my own. As I grew older, I learned to control it. Now I was really tired and just not in the mood. All rational thought left my head, and I just saw red.

"You'll have your fucking stuff, OK? It's on its way here now. They are going to call me as soon as the plane lands so I can go fetch it in time for your promo. If you'd bother to check your fucking messages, you'd know. I was up at three o clock this morning bailing their fucking drunk as a skunk asses out of trouble." I pointed vaguely in Edge and Lita's direction. "And now I'm gonna have to get up around five tomorrow to go and get your stuff. I've had four hours sleep in the last thirty-six and I'm too tired for this shit. So you know what? Fuck you. All of you." I knew I was red in the face and breathing heavily. It was almost as if I was looking at myself from outside, glaring up into the face of someone who was so much bigger than me. He just kept glaring at me and I started to have visions of my pink slip appearing in my next pay packet.

"Ah, shit," he said suddenly, looking away from me. I watched as he fished out his wallet and handed over some money to Edge. "I was sure it was going to take longer than that." By this stage I had absolutely no idea what was going on.

"They had a bet," Lita explained. "To see who could make you lose your temper and how long it would take."

"A bet," I said, still confused.

"Yep. I was sure he was going to get you with that fake drunk and lost thing," Batista commented, slipping his wallet back in his pocket.

I swung round, incredulous. "Fake drunk… What the hell!" It sank in for a few seconds and then I found myself laughing. It was the smug grin on Edge's face as he tucked that money away into a pocket. So much for thinking I was invisible. It seemed they had been out to get me. Several of them, judging by the money changing hands.

"Yeah, they do it to all the new back room staff. Kind of a rite of passage thing. Some of them can't take it and just leave," Lita explained.

"So how do I compare to average then?"

"The longest has been around five months I think and the shortest two weeks." Edge flashed me that wide cocky grin as he wrapped an arm round Lita's shoulders.

I shook my head. "You know, I really am too tired for this." I glanced back at Batista again. "And I will have an early start in the morning."

"No you don't," came a deep voice from behind me. "You agreed to come for a drink, and you are going to stick to it."

"Mark!" Edge exclaimed. "Oh man, you missed it. She just totally lost it at Dave."

"Is that so?" Those eyes were on me again. I looked on with a slight rueful grin as he pulled out some money and handed it over.

Giving in to the fact that I was going to have to go, I wrenched my eyes away and glanced at the miscreants from the previous might. "You were faking?"

There were nine of us in all. I volunteered to drive one car, so long as I could follow the other one. I still had to get up in the morning, and hadn't eaten since lunch so there was no way I could drink much anyway. Kurt, Edge, Lita and Trish all piled into John Cena's car. That left me with the three big guys. Mark, Dave and Kane, whom I was introduced to finally as Glen. I felt kind of sorry for the rental's suspension when it was loaded up.

Cena drove like a maniac and it took all of my concentration to keep up with him for the ten-minute drive. I'm not a particularly slow driver myself, but at that point I was still struggling at times with remembering to drive on the right if I got flustered.

We got to the bar and went inside. To try and avoid the limelight as much as possible the guys headed for a booth in a corner, and I just tagged along. Once everyone was settled, I found myself with Mark on one side and Kurt on the other. A beer appeared in front of me and I figured one couldn't hurt. I was thirsty and drank it a little too quickly, feeling it go to my head. When another one replaced it I pushed it away and shook my head.

"I'm driving."

"Don't be such a goody two shoes." The voice came from somewhere to my left, but I wasn't sure who it was.

Shaking my head again, I smiled. "Hey, I don't drink and drive and I don't do hard drugs. Other than that my rules are pretty flexible."

A favourite hobby of mine has always been people watching. I was quite content to sit there and nurse a Coke, listening to the conversations going on around me. There was music in the background as well, although it really wasn't my kind of thing. All dance stuff, and I'm more of a rock chick.

The privacy didn't last very long. I supposed it wouldn't – after all they were an eye-catching group. Three girls came sauntering over, trying to look cool and interesting. To my eyes they didn't look old enough to drink.

I knew that Mark was divorced and Dave and Glen were married. Adam and Amy as I knew them that night were dating in reality as well as on screen. I had no idea about the status of the other three. A fourth joined the girls. She looked slightly older, maybe mid twenties.

Amy just rolled her eyes at me. She was obviously used to it and bore it with good will. It sort of came with the territory. Trish just looked bored.

The three younger girls were chattering to anyone that would listen. The older one however had her eyes firmly fixed on Mark. She sort of sidled over and struck up a conversation with him. Watching the posturing and preening of all four of them made me feel a bit sad to be female. It was pretty pathetic really. And why would you hit on a guy that has a woman's name tattooed across his throat?

Feeling slightly superfluous I wriggled out to the right, as there was only Kurt and Trish that side and made my way to the jukebox in the opposite corner. Digging in my pocket for some change, I flicked through the list. Finding something I liked, I pushed the buttons and leant back against the wall next to the machine. Digging in my other pocket I dragged out a pack of cigarettes and lit one. I had mostly quit smoking but still had one occasionally.

"You OK?" a voice came from behind me as I blew out the first lungful of smoke. "Those things will kill you."

"Yeah, so will trying to keep up with John's driving." After glancing at the table, I looked back at Dave. "How do you put up with it? You must feel like knocking their skulls together sometimes."

He chuckled. "That wouldn't do much for my fan base."

I closed my eyes and listened to the track I had picked for a moment. "No, it probably wouldn't. Got to be tempting though."

"Hmm, no comment."

My song ended and I stubbed out my cigarette. A quick check of my watch showed it was already eleven.

"Well, this has been fun and all, but I do have to get up in a few hours to get your stuff. What do you want me to do with it?" I pushed myself upright.

"Uh, could you take it to the arena? I'll probably be there pretty early to do this filming anyway." Nodding, I made my way back to the table.

"I'm going to head off. Anyone want a lift?"

"Where are we going?" the youngest looking of the girls asked. She was sitting next to John, about as close as she could get.

"You aren't invited. At least not with me," I said bluntly.

"What have you got that I haven't?" She looked me up and down and shook her head dismissively. I felt like punching the snotty little bitch. Plainly they hadn't noticed me sitting there before. Hardly a surprise.

"The keys to the car that brought half these guys here."

"You know, maybe we should go," Adam broke in. "Early morning and all that." It looked like these girls were overstepping the boundary of friendly fans and getting to the pain in the butt stage. To add to it all, my phone rang.

Pulling it out of my pocket I groaned when I read the word 'Mum' on the screen. Stepping to the side slightly, I answered the call.

"Hi Mum."

"Oh Jade, turn that music down! I can hardly hear you." She sounded smug about something.

"I can't Mum. I'm in a bar."

"Are you on a date?" Now her curiosity was coming to the fore.

"No, I'm not on a date!" I heard a chuckle beside me but didn't dare look to see who it was. "I've just come out for a drink with some people from work."

"That's nice dear. Although I wish you would tell me more about the people you work with."

"Not much to tell. I've not been with the company long enough." I wondered what it was she wanted. There must be something for her to have rung me. It normally only happened when there was some variety of news.

"Ben came round today. He brought his new girlfriend to meet me." Yep, there it was. Soon we'd be on to 'Your ex-husband is getting a new woman, you won't get him back if you're not careful and you know you aren't getting any younger.'

"Look Mum, it's really late here. I'll give you a call in a couple of days when I've got more time to talk, OK?"

"Well, alright."

"I'll speak to you soon. Love you." Slipping my phone back in my pocket, I saw that everyone else was in the process of heading out of the bar and hurried to catch up. The cars were loaded as before. Adam opened his window and hung his head out. I did the same.

"What room are you in?" he asked.

"Nine eight seven, but why?" I asked, confused. It didn't seem to take much at the moment.

"Because no-one will look for us in your room. Catch you there." The car took off.

Closing my window again I sat back in the seat. "Do I have a choice?"

"Doesn't look like it," Glen replied from the back seat. He and Dave were back there, while Mark had taken the front seat with the most legroom. Fitting I suppose as he's the tallest.

Wonder of wonders, I managed to get straight back to the hotel without getting lost. There was no sign of the others in the lobby.

"You guys are welcome to come up if you want. Doesn't look like I'm going to get any peace soon anyway." I softened the statement with a grin. To be honest, I didn't mind. Who in their right mind would miss out on an opportunity to hang out with these people? And besides, I could get some sleep the next day. It was rare for me to have much to do on the day of a taping.

I spent the ride to the ninth floor in the elevator trying not to think of how much weight was in that car. The smallest of the three was a foot taller than me. I distracted myself with the thought that at least I hadn't been in the room long enough earlier to make a mess.

The room wasn't huge, but roomy enough. It held a double bed, built in wardrobe, and a couch. There was a kind of low dresser along one wall that had a combined TV and DVD player on it. A small en-suite shower and toilet completed the facilities.

"Make yourselves comfortable," I said, dropping my key card on the bedside table. I didn't actually expect that to mean finding baseball on the TV, but apparently it did. I really struggled to get into that game. I was a huge rugby fan in the UK but that was pretty much it. Still, it kept them quite happily occupied.

About fifteen minutes after we arrived there was a knock on the door. Opening it I found the motley bunch out there, minus Trish but plus the proceeds of a trip to a liquor store. They quickly appropriated the TV and found a movie to watch. Some action comedy thing I think. After one more drink, Glen and Dave decided to hit the hay.

I kicked off my boots and curled up on the bed, staring at the TV screen. The news about Ben and his new girlfriend bothered me. I had no idea why. It wasn't as if I wanted him anymore. I just wanted… something.

"I can kick them out if you want?" The bed dipped behind me. Turning my head I saw Mark looking down at me.

"They're fine. I was just thinking about some news from home."

"Bad news?"

I shook my head. "It's nothing really. Just my mother trying to provoke me. She still thinks I made a huge mistake."

He settled his weight back on one elbow so we could talk quietly. "And did you?"

"I don't think so. It's just… Oh, I don't know. Can we talk about something else?" He raised an eyebrow, as I turned round to face him. "You got to ask all the questions earlier. Now it's my turn."

"Yeah well, I don't promise to answer them. Anyway, there's not much to know. Six foot ten, from Death Valley…"

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "Come off it! I know about the Undertaker, I'm a fan. All I know about you is your age and that you're originally from Houston."

"A fan, huh?" A slight mocking tone came into his voice.

"I admit it. I'm a Taker fan. Except for the whole Lord of Darkness thing. To be honest, I thought that sucked. Leather is always a winner though."

"You say what you think all the time?"

"If my life or job doesn't depend on it. Life is too short not too. I wasted the best part of a decade of my life trying to be what other people wanted me to be. And I didn't know any better. I do now. That's all." I stopped abruptly, a little embarrassed that I had spouted off again to him. "Anyway, I thought we were supposed to be talking about you?"

"You didn't ask me a question yet. There really isn't much to tell anyway. What you see is what you get." He shrugged those massive shoulders. I looked him up and down, taking in the tattoos and black clothes.

"Hmm, the American Bad Ass. Figures," I said, popping him a shrug of my own. Stretching, I turned back to the TV to see the credits rolling up the screen. The others gathered their stuff together and left to go to bed. Pushing myself off the bed, I collapsed onto the couch and started to flick through the channels. One of the music channels was showing a recording of a Metallica concert.

"Mind if I stay and watch for a while?" I looked up to see Mark standing at the end of the couch. Shrugging, I sat up and tucked my legs underneath me to leave him room to sit. When the band started to perform one of my favourite songs, I closed my eyes. That was the last thing I remembered.

A noise began to work its way into my consciousness, coupled with a tickling sensation against my hip. After a few seconds I woke enough to realise it was my phone in my pocket. The flight from Washington DC had landed and the bag I had been waiting for was at the customer service desk, ready to be picked up.

I dropped the phone on the floor and contemplated getting up. Then my pillow moved. It probably looked really funny if seen by someone else. My whole body kind of leapt up and I landed on my feet, looking down at where I had just been. My pillow had been Mark's leg. During the time I was asleep I appeared to have moved so that I had been lying with my head sort of on his hip. He was still asleep. Propped up in the corner of the couch, legs stretched out in front.

I sort of went into automatic pilot. My brain didn't want to process the situation. It was too strange to think that I had managed to go to sleep on him. Going to my stuff, I grabbed some clean clothes and hopped in the shower, hoping to wash the fuzziness from my brain. It didn't seem to be working. My mind kept betraying me by picturing him in there with me. That definitely didn't do a thing for my blood pressure.

I got out, dried and dressed and stepped back out into the room. Mark was still asleep. I approached cautiously and looked down at him. I was going to have to wake him up.

"Mark," I called, shaking his shoulder. His eyes opened and he gazed up at me, blinking at the light from the lamp left on from the night before. "I have to go to the airport. You should go back." He grumbled and shifted slightly, wincing at his stiff back. "Yeah, that's why you are supposed to sleep in a bed."

"Not my fault," he muttered. "Don't wanna move."

I sighed. "Well, at least go sleep on the bed for a while then. I've got to go to the airport and then the arena." I picked up my keys and key card and headed out.

The flight had been delayed, and it was now just after six a.m. Traffic was fairly light and it didn't take long to get there. A quick run in to the airline customer service desk and I had the bag and was ready to go. The route to the arena was a little trickier, and I got a bit turned round and lost. It was close to eight thirty by the time I actually parked up and, flashing my pass to the security guard, entered the arena.

It was already quite busy in there. The technicians were bustling around, getting everything set up for the taping that evening. Wardrobe people were also setting up, and people seemed to be everywhere. I grabbed a passing person and found out where the locker room was.

I reached the door and raised my hand to knock when I heard voices inside. I recognised them both. One was Dave's, the other was familiar but I couldn't place it.

Realising I looked a bit of an idiot stood in the corridor with my hand hanging in mid air, I knocked quickly. A voice called for me to come in and I opened the door and stepped through.

"Well?" came the familiar voice impatiently. My head jerked in the direction of its owner. It was the chairman, Vince McMahon. I had never met him but seen him on TV often enough.

"I've got your stuff," I said, glancing at Dave.

"Thanks. Just sling it on the bench there," he replied, pointing. "You may be able to help. Do you know where Mark is?"

"Er…" The question caught me off guard and I floundered for a second before coming up with an answer. Saying that I had left him in my room wouldn't sound too good, despite it being totally innocent. I settled for an ambiguous reply. "At the hotel as far as I know."

"His cell is turned off and he's not answering the phone in his room," Vince complained. "Well, if either of you see him, tell him I need to speak to him." He swept out of the room.

"I think I'll just grab a coffee and head back to the hotel for a while." I turned towards the door.

"What time did Mark leave your room last night?" I faced back towards Dave again.

"Umm, don't really remember." It was only half a lie. As far as I knew he could have left the room just after I had. "I fell asleep."

"But he was gone when you woke up."

"Not exactly," I said hesitantly. He stared at me, eyes wide. "Look, we both fell asleep. He didn't want to move when I had to go, so I left him there. On the couch." OK, I had told him to sleep on the bed, but he'd been on the couch when I left. "He's probably out of there by now. It was kind of early when I had to get up. And I have learned by now that several of you guys aren't morning people."

"Right, you fell asleep." I glared at him, finally catching the glimmer of amusement in his eyes.

"Oh God!" I exclaimed. "You are such a… a man! Stop yanking my chain, huh?" I moved back to the door. "Right now, I am going to go back to the hotel, get some sleep, and then maybe I'll think about getting a job where I work with adults rather than hideously over-grown children." I flounced out, shutting the door noisily behind me. I could hear his laughter as I made my way down the hall.

I was a little worried as I drove away from the arena. It hadn't been totally clear whether Dave had believed me, and I didn't really want to see Mark's reaction if Dave decided to take the piss out of him over it. I'd only just got over being terrified of the man (and seemingly started to lust over him in the shower) and didn't want to revert to how things had been before. In fact, I was finding myself starting to genuinely like the bloke. In a purely platonic sense of course. Yeah, right, I couldn't even really fool myself with that one. Platonic maybe, but at that time my thoughts seemed to be wandering far from pure.


	3. Chapter 3

The hotel was close to the arena and it was a quick drive back. Hopping into an elevator, I leant against the wall, rubbing at my eyes, which felt, hot and prickly from tiredness. Exiting the car I dragged myself along the hallway and unlocked the door. Dropping my belongings on the dresser, I turned towards the bed. And fell over.

Looking down blearily at my feet, I saw I had fallen over a pile of clothes. A pair of boots, jeans and a shirt lay there. My eyes tracked up to the bed. Rather than being on the bed, Mark was in it. He was lying on his front, the covers low on his back. Shifting to a sitting position from where I had been pretty much spread-eagled when I landed, I wiped a hand over my face. I had been sure he would have gone before I got back.

Struggling to my feet, I thought about waking him up, but then shook my head. I couldn't forget how tired he'd looked the morning before. Sighing, I glanced at the couch. I knew I should try and sleep on there for a while, but also knew that I would never get comfortable if I tried. Any way, it was my bed, in my room. So I just undid my jeans and climbed on top of the covers, in the little bit of room that was left.

I woke up about an hour later, a prickling feeling running up the back of my neck. Turning over quickly, I saw Mark was awake, watching me.

"Trusting, aren't you?" He raised an eyebrow at me.

"Am I in danger then?" I asked flippantly.

"Not from me."

"Didn't think so." I sat up and stretched. "Oh, the boss was looking for you."

"Yeah?" He sat up and leant back against the head of the bed.

"Yep. I saw him when I dropped Dave Batista's bag at the arena. He needs to speak to you about something."

"Guess I'd better get up then." I watched as he pulled himself out of the bed, clad only in boxer shorts, and stretch the stiffness out of his back and neck. He seemed a lot bigger without clothes, a massive expanse of muscle.

"Listen," I said as he pulled on his jeans. "Thanks for dragging me out last night. I had fun." He just nodded and started do up his shirt. "There is one thing though." I swallowed nervously. I'd already experienced the sense of humour of some of the wrestlers, particularly Dave.

"What's that?" He stood in the middle of the room, towering over me.

"Er, Dave knows you didn't leave here last night. I explained, but I'm not sure he believed me." I cringed a little, waiting for him to be pissed at me. It was a surprise, therefore, to see a calculating expression on his face. "What?" I asked nervously.

"I'd lay money on him not being able to keep that to himself. And forgetting your explanation."

"Great," I muttered, rolling my eyes. "I don't mind being talked about, but usually it's because I have done something."

He strolled back over and sat on the end of the bed. "So, what do you want to do about it?"

I looked at him, puzzled. "I don't follow."

"Well, you either ignore it and hope it will go away…"

"Not really my style to be honest. Nothing good ever seems to come from burying your head in the sand."

"Or," he said loudly, annoyed at the interruption, "You do something about it."

"Like what?" I still couldn't work out what was going on behind those green eyes. He regarded me steadily.

"We could give them something to talk about." My heart rate stepped up a notch. Hell, several notches.

"We… as in you and me?"

"Don't sound too keen, will ya? Is it such a horrible idea?"

"No! You just surprised me, that's all."

"What happened to 'Kick back, relax and what happens, happens'?"

I smiled. "That sounds like me." Mark stretched out an arm and ran a finger down the side of my neck, causing goose bumps to rise on my skin and I gave an involuntary shiver.

"Don't try to pretend that I don't have an effect on you." I just shook my head, speechless. He leant forward and for an instant there was the whisper of beard against my cheek then he was gone, standing again. "Come to the arena tonight."

"OK." My voice wouldn't work properly, and it came out croakily. I watched as he gave me a slight smile and left.

I sat there for a couple of minutes, my hand on my cheek where his beard had tickled, trying to see if there was any way I could have misinterpreted what had just happened. Eventually I came to the conclusion that I hadn't. I was a bit old to roll round the bed, squealing madly, so I did the sensible, mature woman kind of thing to do. I went shopping.

Despite feeling chunky around the divas, I had worked hard for the body I had, and was proud of it. I had been fat but wasn't any more. Exercise had largely replaced chocolate as a source of endorphins, although I could still get through the best part of a pound on a bad PMS day.

That evening I pulled on a pair of snug fitting jeans and a fitted T-shirt. As I had worked so hard for that flat stomach, I decided I might as well show it off. The outfit was finished with a new pair of black suede stiletto heeled boots. Taking a quick glance at my watch, I saw it was nearly quarter to seven. The show was scheduled to begin at seven thirty.

Scooping up car keys and phone, I left the hotel and jumped in the car for the short trip to the arena. Showing my pass to the security guard, I slipped inside.

Despite having repeatedly told myself that I couldn't have misunderstood what Mark had said I was still nervous just in case I somehow had. More for something to do than anything else, I found a vending machine and got a bottle of water. As I straightened from the slot, I felt eyes on me, watching. I spun round, and there he was.

"Hey," he said brightly. "I was wondering when you were gonna get here. I don't have any time now. I'm on in the middle and have to get changed. I'll come find you and we'll get something to eat after the show, OK?"

"Yeah, sure," I smiled. I'd forgotten how cold and windy these arenas could be and I shivered.

"You cold?" he asked. I nodded. "Come here." He stepped up to me and rubbed my arms. "Wait here a minute." He disappeared round a corner and came back soon after with a jacket. "Here. I've got to run. See you later."

I pulled the jacket on and sighed in contentment. It was big on me, but warm. I found a monitor to watch the show on, and a wall to sit on. People were milling about all over the place, putting together the finishing touches ready for the show.

"So Jade! Anything you'd like to tell us?" Amy's voice came from down the corridor.

I made a show of thinking it over. "Nope, don't think so. Although you can tell Dave Bautista that next time we're on the same flight, I'm going to send his stuff to a different continent." She snorted with laughter and went back to getting ready.

There was something in the inside pocket of Mark's jacket. I peered inside and grinned when I saw my paperback in there. At least I would have something to read if all the talking got boring.

The show started with the usual noise and shouting from the crowd. The atmosphere could be felt easily backstage. I fended off any comments from the wrestlers with laughter or sarcasm; both of which came quite naturally to me. It was a good bunch of matches, coming thick and fast up until the Undertaker stepped out to do battle with JBL. Taker left the ring victorious, of course and then the talking started. Building up to a big title grudge match at the next pay per view. I knew it would be a while before Mark would be ready, so I dug the book out of its pocket and started reading.

I'd been reading for a little while when I heard someone ask who I was.

"I don't know, Randy. Maybe you should go find out." Amy appeared to be stirring. I saw the wide grin she was flashing in my direction when I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye.

"Hey there, stranger. What are you doing?" Randy had stopped next to me and was looking over my shoulder.

"We call it reading where I come from." I turned the page.

"Don't you recognise me?" I had heard that he could be a bit of a brat sometimes, but this was ridiculous.

"I do. You're Randy Orton." I could hear sniggering coming from somewhere nearby.

"What are you doing here anyway? Ring rats aren't supposed to get back here."

I counted to five, slowly. Retrieving my pass from my jeans, I waved it at him. "Got a backstage pass."

"Are you a fan, or what? I don't know you, and I know all the backstage people." Honestly, it was like listening to a snotty teenager.

"Well, you have been off for three months with that knee injury. And I'm both," I said as sweetly as I could, turning another page but still not looking up from my book.

"Both… What the hell does that mean?" He was getting confused now.

"I'm a fan, and an or what." I was starting to have problems keeping a straight face now, and had to bite my lip.

"So you're staff then." He calmed down a little.

"Yep. I'm the travelling gofer. Anything you need help with on the road, I'm your girl." I looked up at him for the first time and smiled. "I'm Jade." I held out a hand to shake. He was very cute in a clean-cut fresh-eyed kind of way. Not my type, but very easy on the eyes all the same.

Mark came round the corner just as we were shaking hands. He stopped and watched us as we reached an uneasy truce. I caught sight of him over Randy's shoulder and shifted away slightly.

Word had obviously spread around of what was supposed to have happened because, as soon as Mark and I were face to face, people seemed to pop out from all over the place to watch.

"You got my keys in there? I can't find them." Mark came over and stood beside Randy. I began rummaging in pockets. Mark leant over me and fished in the inside pocket. Moving his head close to my ear, he spoke low, so that only I could hear him. "You ready to give them something real to talk about?" I nodded, my breathing fast and shallow.

Mark twisted his head towards me and our eyes locked. He moved his body so that he was standing between my knees. All the noise of backstage faded from my ears as his face came closer to mine. I closed my eyes as our lips touched for the first time. His tongue swept across my bottom lip, and I opened my mouth to him, slipping my arms round his neck.

He pulled back slightly, breaking the kiss and smiled down at me. "Ready to go?"

"Yep." I slid down off the wall. I t meant that I was pressed right up against him for a few seconds, and I made sure I enjoyed every single one. Mark headed for the exit, and I followed along behind. I couldn't keep in a laugh as we walked past Dave.

"I mean it you know," I smiled, pointing a finger at him. "Me. Your luggage. I'm thinking Outer Mongolia, somewhere like that."

"You bring your car?" Mark asked as we got out into the air. "I'll follow you to the hotel and we can go on from there."

Just as I got to my car, the phone rang. Plugging the hands free into my ear, I hit the button without checking who it was.

"OK, who's lost what now?"

"Jade?" My mother sounded confused. Whatever she had rung me for the night before must have been something she really wanted to tell me.

"Sorry. I didn't check the caller ID. I thought you were someone from work."

"Where are you? Not in another bar?" I love my mother to bits (especially on a different continent) but she is pretty nosy.

"No, I'm in the car. I've just been to watch the wrestling."

"Oh, you still watch that too, then." 'You could say that' I thought to myself, stifling a laugh. "I saw the other day that they are going to be here when you are."

"Fancy that!" I was having real trouble keeping from laughing out loud.

"Would you like me to try and get tickets for us and your sister?"

"Sure, why not? I'll get them though. It can be my treat. You can stay the night up in London. I'll be up there anyway. We can have dinner after. Now, you're bursting to tell me something."

"Well, I told you yesterday that Ben brought someone to meet me. They haven't told anyone yet, but they are engaged. He wants to settle down and start a family as soon as possible."

I heaved a great big sigh as I pulled into the hotel parking lot and killed the engine. "That's nice for him."

"She's so pretty. Tiny and blonde. You know you made a huge mistake letting him go." She was lecturing me now. I leant on the side of the car and watched Mark pull in beside me and get out of his car. Wiping a hand over my face I tried to think of a reply.

"I know you think that Mum. I just don't agree with you. Look, I have to go. I'm meeting someone."

"Is it a man? Are you going on a date?" I rolled my eyes at the excitement in her voice.

"Yes, it's a man. And… I don't really know what it is. I'll call you next week. I'm going to be at home for a few days. Love you." Pushing the end button, I glanced at Mark out of the corner of my eye.

"Hey," I said quietly.

"Something up?" he asked, leaning beside me.

"Not really. Although I do now have to get three tickets for the London Raw show."

"You good to go then?"

"Yeah. I could do with a drink." I pushed myself upright.

We were quickly in the car and away. I was feeling a bit unsure of myself and just stared out of the window, watching the street lights go by.

"Earth to Jade! You still here girl?" He was laughing at me as I jumped and turned to look at him.

"Sorry. I was miles away. What?" At least it was dark so he couldn't see me colour up.

"I asked who the Raw tickets are for."

"My mother is a rabid fan. As it's on at the same time as I'm in the UK, she wanted to go."

"I'm confused. Why wouldn't it be on when you're there?"

"Ah… She knows what I do, but I've never actually told her the company I work for. She loves wrestling but she wouldn't approve."

"Why the hell not?" He sounded incredulous.

"She's old fashioned. In her mind girls should marry young and start popping out kids asap. Hurtling round all over the place surrounded by burly wrestlers isn't really conducive to that." I could feel myself wanting to ramble, but stopped myself in time.

"So, you going to tell her then?" He turned off the road and parked up.

"Probably. I'll take her backstage and let her meet some people. Try and soften her up to the idea." We climbed out of the car and walked into the restaurant. It looked like a nice place. Not too fancy. I'm not much into fancy restaurants and fussy food.

We didn't talk much as we sat at our table and checked out the menu. I settled for a steak and green salad. Mark ordered enough food to feed a small army it seemed. Guess there was a lot of him to feed. Grabbing the beer that I'd ordered, I took a long pull.

"God, that's better! Sorry, I'm being lousy company. So, do you come here often?" I grinned at his expression. A line that cheesy always got some sort of response. He took a drink from his own beer, watching me intently the whole time over the top of the bottle. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

As we ate, we took a little time to find out a bit more about each other. Mark also lived in the Houston area, on a ranch he owned just outside the city. His ex lived in the house they used to share in Florida. We shared similar taste in music, and both liked motorbikes, although preferred different types. Mark seemed taken aback by the fact that my path towards working with the superstars of the WWE had partially been spent working on livestock farms, but agreed that shit shovelling was probably good experience for dealing with some of them.

By the time we had finished dessert I had probably had more beer than was strictly sensible. I was feeling pretty relaxed and my mouth was starting to run way ahead of my brain. Otherwise I would probably never have been brave enough to say what I did.

"What are we doing?" I asked, fiddling with an empty bottle. Mark just looked at me, eyes narrowing slightly. "I mean, is this a date? Moving towards being friends? I'm a little lost."

"What do you want it to be?"

"That's kind of beside the point." Slightly drunk, but still with it enough to duck an awkward question. "I want to know where we are right now. The future can take care of itself."

"Yes, this is a date. As for the rest of it, let's wait and see. Do you want another drink?"

I gazed slightly blearily at the empty bottle in front of me. "I guess I've had enough."

"I'll get the check and we'll head back."

"I'll split it," I suggested. Outraged Texan male pride is quite visually startling, especially in someone that size. I didn't press the point. After all, he had the car keys.

One of the things I love about American cars is that so many of them have those bench type seats in the front. Once we were on the move, I kind of inched my way along closer to him, trying to be subtle about it. Mark chuckled deep in his chest once I was only about two inches away from him.

"Do you want something?" I gave up trying to be subtle and leant against his arm. He pushed me away for a second and then held his arm up so I could scoot underneath and snuggle into his chest. That's the other thing about American cars. Mostly automatic gears so they can be driven one-handed. I closed my eyes and sighed contentedly.

To be honest, I didn't really understand why I was there. Not that I was complaining. We pulled into the hotel parking lot and I moved with great reluctance to get out of the car. We walked in silence into the hotel and took the elevator to my floor.

"You coming in?" I asked when we were outside my door.

"Probably not a good idea."

"Are you implying I have no self control?" I stood back, hands on my hips.

"Well now, let's see." Mark stepped forward and bent down to kiss me. Picking me up he pushed me back against the wall with his body, sliding his hands down my sides to hold the back of my thighs. I melted at the feel of him so close, winding my arms around his neck and legs round his waist, pushing against the wall to get as close as physically possible. He broke the kiss and set me back down on my feet.

"None at all," he grinned down at me. "I'll see you tomorrow." He placed a small kiss on my cheek and strode back towards the elevator. I let myself into my room, convinced I would never get to sleep. The last couple of nights had taken their toll however, and I was asleep soon after my head hit the pillow.

It was an early afternoon flight the next day. I slept until nine and quickly showered, still with thoughts of being kept company by Mark, and dressed before going to the hotel restaurant for breakfast. Grabbing some toast and juice from the buffet, I looked around and spotted Tara, the woman who had covered for me. She worked in make-up and we had become friends in the short time I had been on the road. I slid into the seat across from her.

"I've been hearing rumours about you," she said brightly.

"You know you shouldn't listen to gossip." I munched unenthusiastically on my toast. "What have you heard?"

"Oh, something about you and a certain superstar." She leant forward over the table. "Is it true?"

"I do know a few," I replied obliquely.

"This one apparently spent a night in your room, kissed you at the arena and then you disappeared with him." I knew Tara. There was no point in trying to evade her questioning. My seat on the plane was next to hers and we were sharing a room at the other end. If I didn't tell her what she wanted to know, she just wouldn't stop until I gave in.

"I don't think Outer Mongolia is far enough away," I muttered, shaking my head when Tara looked at me blankly. "Never mind, private vendetta coming up. Yes, he slept in my room, but that's all it was. And he took me out for dinner last night. That's it, straight from the horse's mouth."

Tara took a drink from her coffee and looked thoughtful. "You know, it gives me some hope that I might get my man eventually."

"Tara, he's married. So are you, come to that."

"Right, like that would stop me if the chance came up." She glanced at me over the edge of her cup.

"I suppose I have seen the pictures of your husband. There's a bit of a difference. Married men are out of bounds as far as I'm concerned. I didn't cheat when I was married, although it could have been tempting." I finished my toast and fetched myself a coffee.

"So, what are you doing for your birthday?" she asked once I was sat down again.

"Nothing too exciting. I'll be at home. Although I am giving myself a present this year." I smiled widely at the thought.

"Oh?"

"Not telling. I'll bring it to the arena if I can get it sorted in time though."

Tara picked up the magazine she had been reading and flicked through the pages. "Are you dreading this birthday?"

"Shut up brat!" I exclaimed in mock indignation. "You wait, you won't be twenty-one forever."

"No, but I've got a long way to go before I hit thirty." She flashed me a sarcastic little smirk.

"Jeez, why not shout it a little louder? I'm pretty sure there's someone on the east coast that didn't hear you."

"Anyway, I'd have thought you would be lying in this morning. Did you stay in your room? And where you alone?"

"Yes and yes. What are you expecting me to do? Go storming up to his room and bang on his door, demanding he lets me in so I can jump his bones?"

"Hell, if I'd known that was a possibility I wouldn't have got up yet." My mouth snapped shut and I turned slowly to see Mark standing behind me.

"Morning Taker. I'll see you later Jade." Tara slid from her seat with an overly innocent look on her face.

"Morning." The contents of the coffee mug seemed very interesting. That scheming little mare had played me well. Judging by the look on her face as she had left, she had known full well he was there and provoked me into shooting my mouth off.

"Sleep well?" he inquired, putting down a plate that again looked like enough to feed three normal people.

"Like a log. You're not seriously going to eat that lot are you?"

"He laughed. "Just watch me. I need fuel." True to his word, he ate every scrap. Along with three huge mugs of coffee. Now, I loved my coffee, but I was nowhere near his league. When he had finished, he pushed his plate away with a satisfied sigh. "What was that about jumping my bones?"

I flushed slightly and shook my head. "How can you think about that with a gutful of food like you just ate? You'd explode."

"Not a breakfast person then."

"No more than toast, juice and coffee first thing. I'm not a morning person by choice."

"So no chance of bones being jumped then." I could see he was teasing and it inspired a mischievous streak in me.

"You're the one with the self control not me, remember? I'm going to watch a movie until it's time to go. See you later." I got up and went back to my room, not looking back.

I'd been there for around five minutes and was flicking through the cable channels, trying to find something worth watching when there was a knock at the door. On opening it, I found Mark outside, leaning against the wall.

"Something I can help you with?" He didn't say a word, just stepped through the door and shut it behind him. "I was just trying to decide what to watch." Gesturing towards the TV I moved back to the couch and sat down. Still not speaking, Mark sat beside me. It wasn't a particularly big couch, and I could fell him all along my right side, warm and solid.

To distract myself as much as anything, I found an action film to put on, something with big muscular men getting sweaty and violent. There was a definite theme developing and it wasn't working well as a distraction tactic for my brain. Especially when Mark extended one long arm around my shoulders and idly ran a finger up the side of my neck before dragging it along the line of my jaw. My eyes closed and my head dropped back onto his arm. He moved and replaced his hand with his mouth, tickling the sensitive skin with his beard. I let out a shaky breath and raised a hand to pull his hair loose from its band.

Mark sat back a little and watched me for a second, the sides of his mouth curving upwards slightly. I ran my eyes over his face and down his neck, until I reached the base of his throat. That destroyed my mood a little. Suddenly I just had to move. Pushing at Mark's chest, I shot to my feet and across the room.

"Something wrong?" Mark stood, a slight frown on his brow.

"Yes… No… I don't know. I need to finish packing." I turned away, unable to meet his eyes.

"Whoa now darlin'. What just happened here?" He caught my arm and made me sit beside him.

I ran a hand through my hair. "I guess I'm out of practice. I panicked." Although I tried to fight it, I couldn't help the way my eyes dropped to the base of his throat again. His head dipped with my eye line and he caught on quickly.

"This part of the problem?" he asked, tapping his throat with a finger.

I risked a glance at him. He didn't look angry. A bit put out, but not actually angry. "Honestly, yes it is. It's a strange thing to have to deal with. It might take some getting used to. All of it."

"I thought we were doing OK getting to know each other."

"We are." I managed a weak smile. "Although you intimidate the hell out of me sometimes."

"Hmmm. I thought we were making progress."

"Again, we are. Just two days ago I was scared shitless of you."

"Scared of me?" He seemed genuinely surprised.

"You're not exactly the most approachable guy on the planet. You're aggressive, and grumpy and have this way of looking through people rather than at them."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" There was tenseness in the muscles of his neck that made me wary.

"You're not exactly a warm fluffy teddy bear." Mark mouthed the words 'warm fluffy teddy bear' back at me. The tense atmosphere dissipated as his expression progressed to totally bewildered. No matter how hard I tried, the laughter wouldn't stay inside and bubbled out until I was almost crying with the effort of it. Mark just sat there patiently until I'd finished.

"I'm sorry," I said when I had calmed down. "It's all just so new. And I'm having some trouble separating Taker from Mark. I guess years of watching someone on TV have that effect. Can you just give me a little time?"

"Time, huh? Well darlin', I will but don't take too long." He stood again. "I'll leave you to your packing."

As I gathered up belongings that had scattered far and wide for such a short space of time in one place, I thought about what had happened. If Mark was willing to give me time then it didn't seem like a real 'shag and leave quickly' scenario. 'Ah well,' I reminded myself, 'What happens, happens.'


	4. Chapter 4

The flight to Utah went off without a hitch. The car and hotel arrangements were all fine. Tara chatted away constantly as we went from airport to hotel and then to the room we were sharing. It was a relief when she went to shower before going out with some of the backstage crew. She did invite me, but I was feeling particularly anti-social. She came back moderately drunk and kept me awake for a while talking about her unrequited love and asking me if I could understand.

To be honest, I couldn't. When I was twenty-one, I was far too serious for my own good. I'd been in a relationship for five years and acted far too old really. That all changed a year later when we split up and I went a bit wild for the best part of a year. Then I made what I now know to be a mistake and got back together with the guy. Six months later we were married and stayed that way for six years. That's where we came in.

The next morning, I had a phone call summoning me to the arena. My probationary period was up, and I had to have a meeting with management to assess whether they wanted to take me on permanently. That's how I ended up at the arena dressed in a skirt, blouse and high heels.

Peter, the manager I was supposed to meet with was in a meeting that was scheduled to take another hour or so when I got there. To fill in the time, I wandered out and leaned on the security wall by the ramp in the main arena. Rey Mysterio and Chris Masters were running through their match for that evening and, as per usual, the smaller man was flying everywhere.

The two finished their practice and left. I wandered down to the ring and leant on the edge. I can be a bit of a worrier by nature and I was concerned about this meeting. I adored my job and wanted to keep it more than anything. However amusing it may have been to watch, I knew I should never have blown up as I had at Batista in Seattle. If that had got back, I could be in trouble. And I had a distinct feeling that fraternising with one of the show's stars probably wouldn't be greeted with great enthusiasm.

"A skirt?" I whirled round as a voice boomed out behind me. Glen stood there, hands on his hips. "Don't let Mark catch you. I don't know if the old man's blood pressure could stand it!"

"Ah, shut it," I laughed. "It's a very respectable skirt. Look, it goes all the way down to my knees."

"And all the way past your hips if I push it." Mark joined us at ringside. I hadn't seen him since the 'incident' at the hotel in Seattle. It was a relief to find that I didn't feel awkward around him.

"Yeah, and you're not going to!" I replied.

He raised an eyebrow. "And just why not darlin'?"

"Because in," I glanced at my watch, "twenty minutes, I have a meeting to see if I get to keep running round after you bunch of juvenile delinquents."

"She's talking about you," Glen stated.

"I should go wait to be called in." I ignored Glen.

"We'll probably still be down here when you get out. Come find me." Mark was already stretching out his muscles, ready to get into the ring.

"Ok," I called as I headed up the ramp. Stopping halfway up, I turned back. "Oh, and Glen called you old!" The look on Glen's face made me smirk, and I was still smiling as I got to the room Peter was using as an office.

I had to wait about ten minutes before he called me in. I took a deep breath as I sat in the chair he indicated and smoothed my skirt down.

"How do you feel you have been getting on?"

"Well, I think. I'm thoroughly enjoying the job. It can be challenging at times but I like that."

"The reports I've had about you have been mostly positive. There are, however, two exceptions. There was an argument with one of the talents in a hotel lobby?" He glanced up from the piece of paper in front of him.

"That was part of a practical joke they were playing on me as a new member of staff. I agree the loss of temper was unfortunate, but it was cleared up quickly." I started to sweat a little. I had an idea what the second matter could be.

"Right. If it's all sorted then that's fine. The other thing is a rumour that you have an involvement with one of the talents. Any comments on that one?"

"Well, I don't recall seeing anything about it in the staff handbook. Is there a rule against it?" My heart was trying to beat its way out of my chest. I so wanted to keep this job.

"Strictly speaking, no. It's not something that has occurred very much between back stage staff and talent in the past. Not that has come to our attention, anyway." Peter didn't look like he was about to fire me on the spot, so I felt more positive and able to say what I thought.

"I don't feel it has any bearing on my ability to do my job."

"Good," he said decisively. "Now we have that out of the way, as you know, your probationary period is just about up. We'd like you to stay on and expand what you do a little, start getting involved with running the autograph sessions, meet and greets and so on. Much the same sort of thing as you do for the travel. Making sure everyone gets to where they are supposed to be, that kind of thing."

"Sounds interesting." I liked the idea of getting to see the wrestlers interacting with the public. Something grated in me at the use of the word talents, but it was a minor annoyance really.

"The next autograph session is the day after tomorrow. I'll get Karen to give you all of the details." With that, the meeting was over. We shook hands and I left the office and wandered back to the ring.

Even in practice the sight of two guys as big as Mark and Glen moving round the ring was impressive. I went to the bottom of the ramp and pulled myself up to sit on the corner of the security wall, trying to remember to be lady-like and keep my knees together. I watched as they finished up and both climbed over the top rope. Glen just smiled and walked on up the ramp, rolling his neck and shoulders.

"Did you beat on him badly?" I grinned at Mark.

"Hell, no-one calls me old and gets away with it," he shrugged. "Come on, I need a shower then we'll get lunch."

"Yes boss!" I mocked, sliding off the wall.

"Don't you think you're in a dangerous position to tease me?" he asked slowly. I glanced up at him.

"Dangerous position?" He tugged the waistband of my skirt. "Oh." I started behaving immediately. Mark smirked and grabbed my hand, dragging me up the ramp. It was hard work trying to keep up with him in heels, but I managed not to fall over. He took me through to the locker room and let go of me once we were inside. Stripping off the T-shirt he was wearing, he dropped it on the floor by his bag.

"How did it go?"

I sat on a bench that ran along one wall. "OK. I think they are keeping an eye on me though." He picked up a towel and wiped the sweat of his forehead.

"Why?"

"Uh, rowing with a talent in a hotel lobby. And um… how did he put it? Oh yeah, a rumour that I have an involvement with a talent. I told him that the row thing was a joke, and the 'involvement' didn't stop me doing my job."

"They got a problem with it?" He sat on the bench beside me.

"Not a major one, obviously. I've got my job, and they want me to start helping with other stuff. Autograph sessions and such."

"Hey, what's that?" He pointed to a dark patch that showed through the white blouse. I glanced down.

"A tattoo. I've got a few."

"Oh yeah? Where?"

I laughed and tapped his thigh. "Patience. You'll get to see them all eventually." Mark looked at me, eyes narrowed slightly. He nodded once and then stood up.

"I've got to get in the shower before I stiffen up." He threw the towel over his shoulder.

"And just what am I supposed to do while I'm waiting for you?"

"If you get bored, you're welcome to join me," he replied with a wicked looking grin. "I won't be long anyway."

It has to be remembered at this point that the last few days had been spent with lurid fantasies every time I was in the shower myself. I was completely torn between ripping my clothes off and running in there and… not. I heard the water start running and noticed the door wasn't shut properly. There was another temptation – to play peeping Tom. I actually found myself on my feet and heading towards the door. It seemed that my body had decided to totally bypass my brain. Common sense tried to get a look in, telling me that going into catering with wet hair would not be a good idea. I went back to the bench.

My life has been spent as a strange kind of split personality. Some of the time I am rigidly organised and don't do anything without thinking about it for a long time beforehand, sometimes months. The rest of the time I am totally impulsive. It was that side of me that had got me to the USA and into this job. Occasionally, as at that point, the two parts clash as both try to gain dominance. At that point, anything can happen. And often has.

This time the ordered part of my brain won. I sat there, trying not to create mental pictures of what was going on the other side of that door. I failed dismally. By the time the water was turned off I was feeling a little hot and bothered and could have done with a shower of my own. A cold shower at that.

"Can you pass me my clothes?" Mark's voice came from the other side of the door. I picked up his stuff and handed it through the door. "Thanks. I thought you might be shy." It sounded like there was a hint of challenge in his words. Kind of a 'dare you'. I was never able to resist those. Swinging the door wide open, I leant against the wall, arms folded across my front. Mark looked up, surprised. He had the towel wrapped round himself and his hair was still dripping.

"Nah, I'm not shy. You?" I asked, trying for an innocent look.

"You'd best be sure you want me to answer that before you try me," he said, putting one hand on the towel at his waist. I was saved from having to answer by Glen sticking his head round the door.

"You coming to get something to eat?" The doors were slightly out of line so he couldn't actually see Mark.

"Yeah. Just let me finish up in here and we'll be right out," he called back. Looking at me, he shrugged and dropped the towel.

I'll admit to watching quite happily as Mark dressed. Who wouldn't? The guy is big, covered in muscle and I have a soft spot for tattoos. Which was a good thing in this case. The contrast between the sleeves and his body fascinated me. Of course there was the one across his throat, and across his stomach, but that was it. It gave me material for thousands of potential shower fantasies.

Catering was pretty full when we got there. Glen was already inside sat at a table and we got our food quickly (well, I did – it takes time to pile a plate six inches high!) and joined him. I looked around the room to see who was there as I started eating. Peter sat the other side of the room and was watching me, seemingly checking on my behaviour. I didn't have a clue quite what he was expecting me to do right in the middle of catering, but I just concentrated on my food and chatted to the two men with me. Once I had finished eating, I went and found Karen to get the details for the following day

I stayed away from the arena for that evening's show. I couldn't help thinking that everything I did might be reported back to Peter. Although he seemed to have taken my statement that my work wouldn't be affected, I didn't want to do anything to put my job in jeopardy. I had an early night instead.

I met up with Karen at breakfast the following morning to find out what the day was going to entail for me. Basically it was more gofer type work. I had to be there in case anything was needed. Important stuff like bottles of water for the wrestlers. Really important stuff.

It was actually great fun. Three real pros – Hunter, Shawn Michaels and Batista. The fans varied wildly. There were the die-hard wrestling fans and little kids who were totally over-awed by meeting their heroes. Some had dressed up as their favourite wrestlers. I had to laugh at the guy who was no taller than me and had come as Taker. Old School Undertaker at that. Some of the women were annoying, lots of skin showing and fluttering their eyelashes. It didn't get them anywhere with these three as they were all married.

I was really looking forward to the next day. We were due to fly to Houston. Once everyone had got there and were settled into the hotel I was going to be able to go home. I was in such a good mood when I got back to the hotel that I agreed to be dragged out by Tara. I even went so far as to allow her to pick out what I was going to wear. It was probably an error in a moment of weakness, but she held me to it.

"It's all about confidence," was all she would say.

I grumbled at what she had selected when it was time to get changed. A short black suede skirt and a tight fitting black sleeveless T-shirt. I had bought the skirt in a moment of madness when it was on sale in a small town we had visited three weeks earlier. Giving up trying to argue with her I pulled on the boots I had worn for my date with Mark. We went down to the lobby, outside and got into a cab.

"No one else coming?" I asked, surprised. Tara looked shifty.

"Just us." She wouldn't look at me and I started to get suspicious.

We pulled up outside of a bar and Tara paid the driver. The place was pretty full and noisy as we headed to the bar.

"What do you want?" Tara dug out some money.

"Apart from more clothes?"

"To drink, you idiot!" she laughed.

"Ah, give me a shot of Jack. If I've got to stand here and look like I'm enjoying myself while you drool over some guy I'll have to get drunk." The drinks arrived and I tossed the shot down and pointed to the glass as I caught the barman's eye. He refilled it and I downed that one. "That's better." Tara smiled as she sipped delicately at her drink. It was some kind of alco-pop thing. Her smile widened suddenly as she looked at something behind me. I didn't have a chance to turn round before a voice spoke just by my right ear.

"Are you trying to get yourself in deep shit?" I turned quickly and saw Glen standing behind me. It looked like he had come up for a round of drinks.

"What do you mean?"

"If Mark sees you coming out without him dressed like that, well, he won't be happy, put it like that." That annoyed me a little.

"What am I, his territory or something?"

"That's pretty much how it goes. He gets protective."

"Uhuh." Somehow that didn't manage to piss me off. I glanced at Tara. Her overly innocent look was plastered all over her face. "Who's here?"

"Me, Mark, Benoit, Adam, Amy and Batista." That explained Tara's look. Somehow she had found out where her crush was going, and that Mark would be with him. I turned and muttered in her ear.

"Did you just drag me out to get invited over with them?" She gave me the wide-eyed look before nodding, an impish grin on her face.

"You'd probably better go find him," Glen said. "They're over there. I'll grab you a drink." He peered at Tara's bottle and then looked at me.

"Beer, with a bourbon chaser." He nodded and we went to find the others.

They weren't hard to find. They had attracted some female attention. I watched passively as the girls flirted, although I couldn't help feeling angry with the tall black-haired girl who was cosying up to Mark.

Tara was practically dragging at my arm so I allowed her to pull me forward.

"Hi," I said as we got to the table. Mark looked up along with the others. His eyes moved up and down me, taking in what I was wearing. The dark haired girl put her hand on his arm, trying to get his attention. Ignoring her, he stood and stepped over to me.

"You want to go back to the hotel now?" That prompted a soft laugh from me.

"I've only just got here. Besides I, for one, am sharing a room." He took hold of my hand and stepped past the other girl, sitting down and pulling me into his lap. I fidgeted for a moment, trying to tug my skirt down my thighs. I soon stopped when Mark took a quick breath, reminding me of where I was sitting.

After smiling a quick hello to everyone else and making sure everybody knew Tara (who had put herself in a gap next to Batista and what appeared to be where Glen was sitting) I settled back comfortably and enjoyed my position. Glen came back and handed out the drinks before sitting next to Tara.

"So you must be Sara," the girl said suddenly. That was a conversation stopper. Everyone at the table, including Mark just stared at me to see how I would react. I put my beer down on the table and drank down the bourbon quickly.

"No I'm not."

"But his tattoo…"

"What about it?" If viewed from the outside it was probably quite funny. Everyone's eyes were going back and forwards between the two of us as if they were at a tennis match.

"It says Sara," the girl insisted.

"Damn. You know, I'd never noticed." The bourbon had kicked in just enough to make me sarcastic.

"But…"

"Look," I snapped, patience giving out, "He got someone's name inked on him. They split up. Is he supposed to stay celibate for the rest of his life? Only date people named Sara?"

"My name's Sara," she muttered.

"Congratulations. I'm not going to hand him over though." Turning away from her, I felt Mark's arm tighten round my waist, pulling me in tighter against him. I looked at Tara and rolled my eyes. Conversation sprung up again and when I glanced back, the girl had gone.

After that the rest of the evening was great fun. I wriggled off Mark's lap in the end and sat next to him. Tara was flirting with all her might, leaning in and repeatedly touching Batista. He bore it with good will, while trying not to do anything to encourage her. She was beginning to get a bit full on as she drank more.

"Maybe I should get her back to the hotel," I muttered to Mark. He glanced across and nodded.

"Give me your address. We probably won't get much chance to talk tomorrow and I still want to find out where those tattoos are."

I grabbed a paper napkin and scrounged a pen off someone. "You can see one right now." I pointed to the Celtic armband round my right bicep. "Though that's about the only one I'll show you in public."

"When can I see the others?" he asked, pushing me gently with his shoulder.

I considered for a moment. "Soon." Handing him the napkin, I gave him a quick kiss and rose from my seat. "Come on Tara, I'm beat." She shot a glance at me and got up reluctantly, leaning on Batista for support. "See you guys in the morning."

Tara sulked pretty much all of the way back to our room. No matter how many times I tried to tell her that the guy was married, had kids and was nearly twenty years older than her, she wouldn't listen.

"Taker's older than you," she muttered.

"True, but not by so far. One decade rather than closer to two. And I'm older than you. It all gets less noticeable as you get older. And that's not even taking into account the fact that you're married as well. Shit, you've not even been married a year." I knew I was sounding preachy. It was a throwback to when I was younger and a firm believer that marriage was forever. That changed later when I chose to divorce my husband, as there was nothing on earth going to make me happy in my marriage. It was better for both of us that way.

By the time we actually got into our room, the alcohol in my system had made me really sleepy. It was all I could do to take off my make up and grab a T-shirt to sleep in.

By the following afternoon I was back in my own little apartment in Houston. After a long hot bath I decided that I had better phone my mother as I had promised. Working out the time difference made it early evening in the UK, which was usually a good time to catch her. She answered the phone quickly.

"Hi Mum." I snuggled down into my chair.

"Jade! I thought you were never going to call." There was just a hint of reproach in her voice.

"Sorry. I've been busy. Anyway, I'm home now. I'll be here most of the week."

"Come on then. Tell me about the other night! What happened?"

"I should have known that was what you'd want to talk about! We had dinner together."

"Was it a date? Come on Jade, give me details!" I had to laugh at that. Despite being the wrong side of sixty sometimes she can behave like a total teenager.

"Yes, it turned out to be a date. His name is Mark and he works for the same company I do."

"You have to give me more than that. What does he actually do, is he nice and respectable, how old? Give me specifics." Talk about three of the trickiest questions she could ask.

"He's in public relations. He can be nice, although I'd hate to see his face if he heard himself being described like that. Respectable? Not particularly, not what you would call respectable and he's a few years older than me." None of it was a total lie. Performing involved interaction with the public, after all.

"How many years older?" Mum had always had a way of cutting straight to the heart of any matter that might bother her, and this was no exception.

"Er, ten," I said hesitantly.

"I see. And what does 'not particularly respectable' mean?"

"One little word that always horrifies you Mum – tattoos. Lots of them."

"So I take it he has more than Ben then." Everything to do with men and me always went back to Ben.

"Ever so slightly Mum. Ben had three. I have no idea how many Mark has actually got. It would take forever to count them."

"Are you sleeping with him?" My mother believes in being direct. It annoys the hell out of me sometimes, but does actually make life easier in the long run. I'd always been able to talk to her about anything, right up until I left Ben.

"Not yet. By the way," I changed the subject abruptly, "I got the tickets for the wrestling."

Once the conversation got onto safer ground we chatted for quite a while, giving me a chance to catch up on the family gossip. It ended with Mum promising to call me three days later, on my birthday.

Next morning I bounced out of bed bright and early. I was going to buy myself a birthday present and was incredibly excited about it. After a lightning shower and breakfast, I got dressed and headed out on the bus. People looked at me strangely, but I didn't care.

You see, I was going to test ride a couple of motorbikes. I'm a British born and trained rider, so wear a full leather suit and crash helmet whenever I ride. It looks a bit weird on the bus though. As soon as I knew the date I would be back in Houston I had called the dealer and arranged to check some out. My bike was one of the things I had hated most leaving behind when I emigrated.

I fell in love with one the second I sat on it. A 600cc sports bike in black, with silver tribal designs up the side. It looked fast and it was. Just under a year old, it took up most of the money I had brought to the US with me, but I felt it was worth every single cent. All the paperwork was done and the bike was taken away. It needed to be prepared for me to pick it up the following day. It was going to be good to have transportation again.

The trip out to the arena for that night made me look forward to the following day. There were three events in Texas that week. Raw was in Galveston, then Smackdown in Pasadena and finally the Vengeance pay per view in Houston. All were close enough for me to have thought that travelling was a good idea, but getting to Galveston was a bit of a bitch.

Mark wasn't on Raw that night, but there were a couple of great matches. Rey Mysterio did the 619 on Carlito through every side of the ring. It's just one of those moves that you can't understand. How does he get through those ropes every single time without cocking it up? Then there was a good old-fashioned 'slobber knocker' as JR would say between JBL and William Regal, full of big hits and power moves.

After the last match of the night started between Mark Henry and Kurt Angle, I made my way through the back to find Tara. She was packing up her stuff ready to be moved to the arena at Pasadena. Flopping down into a chair, I watched her putting all the stuff into its little compartments. For a few minutes I wondered if she wasn't talking to me after dragging her out of that bar, but eventually she snapped the box shut and sat in another chair.

"Jerry rang me today."

"Oh?" Jerry was her husband.

"He says we need to talk. There are some things we need to sort out." She ran a hand through her hair.

"Any idea what?"

"Oh yeah." She took a deep breath. "Babies. He wants 'em. Plural."

"And you don't." It didn't need to be a question. Her expression told me exactly what she thought of the idea.

"I've got some holiday due. I guess I'll have to take it and go see him. You got any kids?"

"No. Never wanted them. Other people's are OK, mostly 'cos I can give them back after a while. I've got a nephew I'm quite fond of, but other than that kids and I don't really see eye to eye."

"Well," she said, getting up from her chair, "No point in worrying about it 'til I get there. You want to go get a drink?"

"I should start back. Public transport's a bitch, especially if it gets late. I'll see you at Smackdown."

"Hey, you got that thing you were talking about? You said you'd bring it!"

"I'm picking it up tomorrow. It'll be at the arena in Pasadena." I was pleased she had given up sulking at me, but I felt for her over this thing with Jerry. It was perfectly obvious that she didn't want kids. She loved her job and the travelling it involved, not to mention it allowed her to drool over a certain wrestler. And she was young too. Made me start to feel a little old as I stared the end of my twenties in the face.


	5. Chapter 5

Reaching the rating in this chapter!

The next day was entirely taken up in playing with my new bike. I must have used nearly a whole tank full of gas and got lost twice as I revelled in the feeling of being on a bike again.

The morning before my birthday, I decided to go for a run. I didn't like running in strange places, so usually had to make do with going to the gym, or sometimes swimming. I wasn't a particularly good swimmer, at least not good enough to get a decent workout from it and preferred running when I could.

It was a beautiful early summer morning. I was out for just over a couple of hours and walked the last mile home to cool off. I did glance at the big Harley sat outside my building but really didn't take much notice of it. Not really my type of bike. As I let myself into the building's lobby Mr Hall, the building super, came bustling out of his door.

"You have a visitor. I let him in for you."

"You did what?" I was indignant. Some guy shows up and says he is there to see me and just gets let into my apartment? Pretty outrageous if you ask me.

"You never said you had such interesting friends," he said excitedly.

"Huh?"

"Who would have thought it? Him here!" OK, so now the guy was talking gibberish. Giving up, I decided to be brave and head on up. Although I did think about dialling 911 on my phone and hovering my finger over the button.

Opening the apartment door, I poked my head inside. Everything started to make sense when I caught sight of the man sat on my couch reading one of my books.

"Hi." I stepped inside and closed the door. "I think you made an impression on old Mr Hall."

Mark chuckled. "I was kind of surprised when he told me to come up."

"I'm pretty sure you have a fan there. He was kind of excited." I was conscious that I must have looked a total mess. Half of my hair had escaped from its ponytail and I was still sweaty from my run. "Let me just grab a shower and I'll be back out. I would say make yourself at home, but looks like you've done that already. There's juice or water in the fridge if you want."

Ten minutes later I was back, dressed more respectably in jeans and a T-shirt, towelling my hair dry. Mark had obviously been on a scouting mission into the kitchen as he had a glass of juice and a sandwich. Music was playing and a sports channel was showing on the TV.

"You said to make myself at home," he shrugged when he caught the expression on my face. Laughing, I grabbed myself some juice and perched on the arm of the couch.

"So, what did you want to make you come trekking over here, getting old Mr Hall hyped up? I can't imagine you don't have food of your own."

"Do I need a reason? Although I do have one. I was thinking you might like to come out to my place for a few days." I looked at him and then round my little apartment. It was clean and tidy, but I was there so little that it was impersonal.

"I'd love to. I'll get some stuff together."

"Do I get to help pick your clothes?" he leered.

I put on a false expression of exasperation. "If you insist. Pretty sad attempt to get into my underwear though."

"Oh, I'll be there soon enough darlin'." I just threw him a look over my shoulder and led the way into my bedroom.

I think we argued about every single item he picked out. Quite why I needed to take the skirt I had worn to the bar, I didn't know. OK, maybe I did. In the end, I gave up and stuffed everything he passed to me into a bag. Although I did manage to select my own underwear.

"You ever been on the back of a Harley?" Mark asked me as I dropped the bag on my bed.

"Uh, I'll follow you if that's OK. I've got a new toy and I'm not done playing with it yet. I'll get changed." Moving to the cupboard, I pulled out my leathers and helmet. Placing them on the floor, I put a hand on the button of my jeans and looked at him.

"Fair's fair," was all that he said. Realising I had seen a whole hell of a lot more of him than I was about to show of myself, I stripped the jeans off and threw them into the bag.

"That's two," his voice came from behind me.

"What?" I felt his hand on the top of my left thigh. Glancing down, I saw he was touching the tattoo of a wolf howling in front of the moon that was there. The sight of his hand on my leg prompted an involuntary shiver and my breath caught in my throat for a second. I had to force myself to step away and start pulling on the leather pants.

With a quick stop off to inform Mr Hall that I was going again, and to let him get excitable about Mark again, we were soon outside the building. I slipped round the side to get my bike, which was kept out of sight and well chained up. After bringing it round to the front and strapping my bag onto the back, I was ready to go.

It took a while to get there. Still, I wasn't complaining. Eventually Mark turned off the road and onto a long driveway and I swung in after him. Flipping up the visor on my helmet, I looked around at the place. Immaculate railed fencing ran alongside the drive and every now and again I could spot a horse or some cattle.

We came up to a house and Mark gestured for me to follow him into a large garage. Parking my bike up next to his, I swung off and untied my bag.

"What do you think so far?" he asked when I had taken off my helmet.

"Wow. How big is this place?"

"Just under three hundred acres. I'll take you round some of it while you're here. Now come on, I'm hungry," he said, striding towards a door into the house.

"Aren't you always?" I muttered, shouldering my bag.

If I had been impressed with the surrounding land, I fell in love with the house as soon as I stepped in the door. I was had at the kitchen. It was enormous. There were all the mod cons and a great old-fashioned range against one wall. The rooms all looked enormous to my eyes. I reckoned my entire apartment would fit into the floor space of the main hallway and living room.

"Can I get changed somewhere?" I asked Mark when we had finished the tour of the ground floor. "This stuff is great for keeping your skin on if you fall off, but it's hell to wear on a hot day."

"Sure. Come on upstairs." We walked up an enormous staircase and into a long hallway. "There you go." He pointed to one of several doors.

"How many damn bedrooms does this place have?"

"Six altogether. Mine is that door at the end."

"OK. I'll come find you downstairs?" I opened the door he had shown me.

"Sure. I'll be in the kitchen."

"Oof, big surprise there!" I laughed, pushing the door to behind me.

It was hot now so I pulled out a sleeveless T-shirt and a pair of cut off jeans to wear. After sorting out the inevitable 'helmet hair' I padded back down to the kitchen. A cold beer was sat on the counter waiting for me and I took a grateful gulp.

"Anything you can find in the refrigerator or icebox is fair game," Mark said as I leaned on the counter top beside him. "Make yourself at home while you're here."

After lunch Mark took me out in a truck for a ride around the ranch. He seemed much more relaxed here than I had ever seen him before. The country was beautiful. I was a country girl back home in the UK and this was me in my element. We stopped at the top of a small hill from where you could see for some way all around.

"Hell, Mark! What a place!"

Mark chuckled. "You like it then?" I just looked at him and rolled my eyes.

Later that evening we settled down in front of the TV. Strangely for someone who can get as nervy as me I was very relaxed there. I didn't take much notice of what was actually on. I was far too engrossed in picking out individual images on Mark's arm.

"Tickles," he grumbled as I reached the inside of his bicep.

"What, this?" I gave him an innocent look as I trailed my finger up his arm.

"Yeah, that." He turned his attention back to the screen again.

"You mean this tickles?" I did it again.

"You going to be a pain in the ass all night?"

"Probably. I'm very good at it." I moved my hand once more then squeaked in surprise when he grabbed both my arms.

"Might be a bad idea." He loomed over me, pushing me off balance. My weight tipped back until I was lying on the couch, both arms firmly held in one of his hands. "Now what you gonna do?"

I waited for a few moments to see if the panic was going to return. When it didn't I looked up at him, head tilted to the side. Mark shifted himself so he was right over me, weight supported on the elbow of the arm that wasn't holding mine. I glanced down quickly to the base of his throat and then back up to his face. He had seen what I had done and his face hardened slightly. He moved his weight, seemingly ready to sit up and away from me. The atmosphere was changing and I desperately didn't want it to. I leaned up as far as I could against the hold he had on me and ran my tongue along his lower lip.

Mark rocked back for an instant, watching my face. Then he bent down and kissed me. There was nothing gentle about it. It was hard, primal and forceful and my body reacted the same way. He let go of my hands and put that hand under my chin, holding my head still. I slid my hands up his arms to his shoulders, gripping the mass of muscle there.

Breaking the kiss suddenly Mark pushed himself back onto his knees and pulled my legs up so that I was laying full length on the couch. His intense gaze bored into my eyes, looking for any sign of doubt. There wasn't any.

I'd be lying if I didn't admit that it was disconcerting at first as Mark lay full length over me for the first time. There was just so damn much of him. He slid a knee between mine, levered them apart and lay in the gap. For the first time I was right against him, as close as possible while still fully clothed. He kissed me again, as powerful as the first and I felt his hand at my waist, tracing a path up my side under my T-shirt, making for my breast. My back arched as he found his target, pushing up against his hand. When the bra was pushed out of the way and he began to roll the nipple between his fingers a helpless little moan was forced from my throat.

Mark broke the kiss again and started to nip his way along my jaw line and down my neck. Reaching my collarbone he ran his tongue along it before nipping it once, sharply. My whole body jerked up, forcing my groin into his body. I felt the laughter in his chest rather than hearing it before he pushed my T-shirt up and replaced his fingers on my nipple with his mouth. I let out a loud hiss and dug my fingers into his shoulders. It was probably a good thing at that point that I had very short fingernails. I might have drawn blood otherwise. He turned his attention to the other breast.

"Three," I heard him mutter as he stroked a finger down the unicorn tattooed on the right side of my chest. It tickled and goose bumps appeared on my skin. The warmth of his mouth closed around the hard tight nub of my nipple and prompted another breathless moan. I was confused when he suddenly sat up and put my clothes back in the right place.

"What…" I began.

"There's a perfectly good bed upstairs darlin'. Unless you're gonna run out on me again?" he asked in a thick voice. I pushed myself up to a sitting position and shook my head. Mark held out a hand to me. I took it and allowed him to pull me to my feet and lead the way up the stairs.

There was a brief period of hesitation when he opened the door to his bedroom; just enough to make him look back at me and a slight frown come over his face. I managed to get my legs working again and followed him through into the room. Like everywhere in this house, the room was big and dominated by an enormous bed. Mark stood behind me, hands resting on my shoulders as I looked around. Despite having said I wasn't going to run I felt on a knife edge standing there and had to force myself to take a couple of deep breaths, especially when he ran his hands down my arms and then up my sides, taking my T-shirt off as he went.

"Four." That made me laugh and relaxed me. "What the hell is it, anyway?"

"It's an English rose," I said, looking back at him over the shoulder in question.

"Wouldn't have thought flowers were your style."

"They aren't. It's the badge of the English rugby team." I stopped speaking as he smoothed a hand forward over my shoulder to cup my breast through the material of my bra. Using his other hand to unsnap the strap, he pulled it off and dropped it to the floor. Sliding his hands further down my stomach he undid my cut-offs and pushed them down to the ground. I stepped put of them and stood before him, naked. I felt pretty self-conscious as he looked at me but soon got distracted when he pulled his shirt off. Stepping up to him I ran my fingers down his chest and stomach, stopping just short of his belt buckle. Moving round behind him I did the same on his back, and then completed the circle to stand in front again. Leaning in I swiped one nipple with my tongue before blowing cold air on it, examining the way it pebbled, before repeating the action on the other side. Tracing the lettering on his stomach with a finger caused the muscles to bunch and relax under my touch.

Glancing down I saw the bulge in his jeans. Raising my eyes back to his face I realised he was watching me, a small smile on his face. Not taking my eyes off his my hands dropped to his belt buckle, quickly undoing that and his jeans making sure I brushed the hardness inside. Mark stepped out of the bundle at his feet, leaving him just in a pair of boxers tented out by his erection. Picking me up, he carried me to the bed and dropped me on it before removing that last piece of clothing.

Of course I had seen him naked before in the shower at an arena but this was so much more intense. My breath caught and I bit my bottom lip as I propped myself on one elbow to look him over. There was a predatory look on his face as he approached, moving to cover me with his body again. My legs moved apart seemingly of their own free will to allow him to settle between them. His hand started on my jaw before moving over my body, right down to the junction of my thighs. My breath hitched and my hips bucked up when one finger just brushed my clitoris before travelling further back to slip between the folds of my sex. He stroked right back the length of the heated flesh before slipping the tip inside. A slight smirk appeared on his face when he felt the wetness gathering there. Adding another finger, he started to slowly stroke them in and out. When his thumb circled my clitoris as well my breathing became harsh and my back arched, thrusting my hips harder up into his hand.

"I guess you made up your mind, darlin'" he murmured, bending his head forward to kiss me. He carried on pumping his hand, alternating circling his thumb round my clit to rubbing directly over it. Every now and again he would wander from my mouth to lick and nip down my neck and jaw, always returning back to kiss me again.

I could feel the tightening inside as my climax began to build. My whole body was moving underneath him and my moans and sighs were swallowed by his mouth. The tingling began and I pulled my head away from him, forcing it back into the bed as my body started to go rigid. Mark pulled his fingers from me and then, positioning himself with one hand, entered fully in one thrust. My legs wrapped round his waist and I started to move with him, opening myself to him as much as possible. One of his hands returned to my breast, teasing and pulling the pointed tip. My orgasm broke over me quickly and my muscles loosened although I tried to follow him. Every movement of his after that brought little echoes of the intense pleasure, especially when he hooked an arm under one leg and pulled it further up, allowing greater access.

His thrusts became harder and wilder as he neared his own completion, grunting with the effort. I still moved with him, clamping down tightly with my inner muscles until finally he gave a convulsive thrust and pushed as far into me as he could, his body jerking as he reached his release. Slumping forward, he gave one final kiss before rolling onto his back beside me.

Laying there feeling the sweat cooling on my skin and heart rate returning to normal it all felt slightly surreal. Despite being able to feel the effects of what we had just done I had to turn my head and see Mark lying there beside me, his eyes shut, to be sure that it had happened.

"Problem?" His eyes opened and his head turned towards me.

"No. Just thinking."

"Sounds dangerous. Last thing the world needs is a woman thinking." He grinned as I pushed at him. Of course I couldn't shift him, even slightly, but it made me feel better anyway. Switching to being on my side I began to draw patterns over his skin with a fingertip, just brushing the surface. Mark seemed engrossed in watching my finger as it dipped lower down his torso with each sweep. Kneeling up beside him I replaced my hand with my tongue, catching a nipple in my teeth and worrying it gently. Trailing kisses across his skin as I went I moved up to his collarbone, following the line of it from one side to the other and down to the other nipple. Following his example I worked back to the centre of his chest and nipped the skin, exulting in the sharp breath he drew in and the shiver that passed through his frame. About to carry on, I was stopped as he grabbed my hand and lowered it to his groin.

"Didn't you tell me you like to ride?" His eyes were half closed and he swore under his breath as I took a firm hold of him, teasing with tiny movements of my hand.

"When did I tell you that?" Adjusting my grip I used longer firmer strokes making his hips move upwards slightly.

"On the plane." I twigged what he was talking about. Twisting the words I'd said. I speeded up my rhythm. "Fuck. Just do it." Taking pity on him, I crawled to straddle him and slowly lowered myself down until he was sheathed completely. Moving in vaguely circular motions, grinding down onto him, my head fell back. He hissed as my hair draped down, tickling across his upper thighs. Taking a breast in each hand he flicked my nipples with his thumbs, making me bite my lip. As I moved his body started to move with me and his hands slid down to grip me firmly on my hips, moving me to his liking.

I was always an 'on top' kind of girl. I love the feeling of power but also when the man takes control of it. I just get a real kick out of it. And he did it effortlessly; practically lifting me completely off him before bringing me crashing down so hard I was convinced that my butt was going to be bruised. It was starting to get good, really good. I put my hands on his forearms to keep upright as my balance was threatening to go haywire and my head dropped right forward. Random noises came from my throat as he powered up into me and I could feel my second orgasm of the evening beginning to form in the pit of my stomach. Mark slammed into me a couple more times and then held me down, thrusting up with all his might as he came, and then subsided underneath me, breathing hard.

I was so close to my own climax that I was shaking with it. My breathing was harsh and uneven and I was almost mewling with frustration. Mark looked up at me and raised an eyebrow.

"Something wrong, darlin'?" I swear at that moment I could have ripped him limb from limb, nearly seven feet tall or not. "Something you want?"

"Please," I managed to get out. He shot that wicked grin at me and moved his hand from my hip to where we were still joined, stroking my clit with his thumb. After just a few seconds I could almost hear the blood rushing through my eardrums, as that elusive orgasm seemed to rip through my very soul. Panting, I collapsed forward over his chest, little aftershocks running through my body. Sagging as my muscles relaxed completely, I slid to the side and ended up kind of snuggled into his side.

Once I felt like my body was capable of functioning fully and wasn't going to drop me on my ass the second I tried to stand, I wriggled away from Mark and stood.

"Mind if I borrow this?" I asked, picking up his discarded shirt.

"Where are you going?" He leant up on an elbow.

"To get cleaned up. You know, teeth and stuff," I replied, slipping on the shirt and buttoning it. Slipping out of his room I shut the door behind me and went to my room. Grabbing a towel I hopped in the shower, washing the sweat and everything else from my body. After brushing my teeth I felt decidedly awake. Slipping his shirt back on I padded down the stairs and out to the porch into the warm Texan night. Taking a cigarette out of the packet I had taken from my room, I sat on the bottom step and lit it, listening to the quiet noises of the countryside.

Stubbing out my cigarette after a while, I glanced at my watch. It was just after midnight.

"Damn. Happy birthday me," I whispered quietly. Going back into the house, I went to the living room and curled up on the end of the couch. I was always one of those people who don't go to bed unless they are sleepy (or for more entertaining purposes) as I end up being awake longer. Switching the TV on I found some random sit-com and stared at it, hoping it would lull me into boredom induced slumber.

Unfortunately I got into it and started to watch the following episode as well. I was so engrossed that I didn't hear the footsteps.

"You OK?" Mark's voice made me jump.

"Oh, yeah. Just wasn't sleepy." I stretched, grimacing as my shoulders and neck crackled.

"Thought you'd run away." He smiled as he sat next to me.

"I don't make a habit of it." He had pulled on his jeans but his upper body was bare, allowing me to feast my eyes. "I might just get some milk and then try to sleep." I made my way into the kitchen, mark behind me. Fetching out some milk from the fridge I grabbed a pan from the counter top. "You want some?"

"Sure. Why not?" he shrugged.

We drank our milk in silence, putting the glasses in the sink. It seemed to be working as I did start to feel quite sleepy.

"Time to sleep," Mark said, pushing himself off the counter top he'd been sitting on. I nodded and headed for the stairs. I paused outside my room, a little unsure about where we stood now. Mark glanced at my face as I stopped walking, then took hold of my hand and tugged me down towards his room. Once inside, he stripped his shirt from me. Giving me a light tap on the backside, he pointed towards the bed. I did as he directed, climbing under the covers. He stripped off his jeans, turned out the light and climbed in beside me, throwing one huge arm over my waist.

It took me a while to go to sleep. I'd been sleeping alone for over six months and it seemed strange to be sharing my space with anyone, never mind have them touching me. It was particularly weird to think about whom it was I was sharing this space with. I'd come a long way from being utterly terrified of him in a very short space of time.


	6. Chapter 6

There was a brief moment of panic on waking up the following morning, trying to work out where the hell I was and why I was naked. I had become used to waking in hotel beds rather than my own but they tend to have a generic pattern and, to an extent, all look the same. They also never contained a bed quite as big as the one there. It seemed even bigger as there was no one else in it.

Right at that moment I was in two minds as to what had happened. A wise person once told me that the only things in life you ever regret are the things you haven't done. I certainly didn't regret what had occurred the night before. It was more a question of where I went from that point. This whole thing had started from giving the people who gossiped something to really talk about, and having some fun at the same time. But where do the boundaries of having fun lie?

I wasn't a prude. Yes, I met my husband when I was sixteen. During the time we weren't together I had gone on a few one-night stands but only with people I knew very well. Even then they had been people with whom I could have seen myself having a relationship. Still, I had to stick with the words I had spoken and that Mark had spoken back to me. Kick back, relax and what happens, happens.

There was no sign of him anywhere downstairs when I got there. Mum rang to wish me happy birthday while I was making some coffee. She was still fishing for information in her own 'subtle' way but I managed to evade most of her questions. I was excited to be going home and being able to see my family again. Six weeks felt like forever. I couldn't see myself moving back there but it didn't stop me missing them like crazy.

Mark came back around lunchtime, saying that he been dealing with some business stuff. I hadn't really noticed the time going by as I had been having far too much fun going through his music collection, listening to albums that I hadn't got in my own.

Somehow or other I volunteered to cook dinner that night. I'm not much of a cook, although I'd never starve. Steak is easy enough though. And while I couldn't cook, I could bake. It's a subtle but important difference. I decided to make a chocolate fudge cake. It was always one of my favourites. Just as I had started to make the fudge my phone rang.

"You want me to get that?" Mark called, hearing my frustrated cursing.

"Could you?" I answered. "Just not if it's my mother!"

A couple of minutes later he walked in, carrying the phone. "It's some guy called Andy demanding to know why I'm answering your phone." I grinned and took the phone from his hand.

"Hey gorgeous!"

"Hiya sunshine. Who the hell was that?"

"That's Mark. I'm currently in his kitchen cooking dinner."

Andy snorted. "You're not making …"

"Yes, I'm making chocolate cake. You want me to Fedex the spoons so you can lick them?" I laughed.

"Look, I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday and find out when you are going to be my way next."

"Thank you, and I don't know." I glanced at Mark. "Any idea when we'll be near Chicago next?" He shook his head. "I'll call you when I find a date."

"OK," he said reluctantly. "It'd be good to see you some when soon. You can stay here when you come."

"You're inviting me to stay?" I asked incredulously. "That's something I never thought I'd hear from you. My fudge is going to go bad if I don't get on with it now. Speak to you soon." I put the phone down, chuckling.

"So, who's Andy?" Mark asked, looking at me out of the corner of his eye. There was a slight frown line between his eyes. He really did seem to be quite territorial, although I supposed my conversation with Andy might have sounded different to how it was meant between us.

I picked up a spatula and started layering the fudge onto the cake. "He's my older brother. Does something in insurance over in Chicago." His arms that had been folded across his chest relaxed, and he leant on the top of the counter watching what I was doing. "If you even think about touching this stuff you'll regret it."

"Really." His tone of voice made me look up and I saw his hand reaching towards the cake. Before I even really thought about it I smacked the back of his wrist with the spatula, leaving a smear of chocolate fudge there.

"Yes, really. Now, if you want to eat tonight you'd better get out of here and let me get on."

"Hmm," he rumbled, licking the sticky mess from his arm. "Just remember I have a long memory." There was a look of promise, or maybe threat in his eyes. That and following the way his tongue moved across his skin made me shiver, a tight feeling in the pit of my stomach. I may not have known quite how I had got to where I was, or where it was going but right at that moment all I knew was I couldn't get enough of him.

Dinner turned out surprisingly well given my lack of concentration from that point on. After everything was cleared up Mark went to tinker with something on one of his bikes. I had always been the kind of person that enjoyed time alone, especially if I could find a good book to read so went and raided his bookshelves to see what I could find.

I got totally engrossed in the story I had picked out. By the time Mark came back in I was halfway through the book, a carton of juice and a glass on the table beside me. I jumped as he leant over my shoulder, seeing what I was reading.

"You smell of grease," I said, wrinkling my nose.

"Yeah. I got some on here." He waved the T-shirt in his hand. I twisted in my seat slightly to see his bare chest right behind me as he braced his arms on the back of my seat. "I'm going to take a shower. You coming up soon?"

I glanced at my watch. "Wow, I didn't realise it was so late. Yeah, I'll head on up in a minute." True to my word I soon tucked a scrap of paper into the book to mark my place and headed up the stairs. Pausing outside my door I saw that Mark's door was open and I could hear the shower running. Unable to resist taking a peek, my feet moved of their own accord into his bedroom and towards the sounds of running water.

The shower was enormous. Rather than having an enclosed shower cubicle it was a kind of wet room, all tiled with a number of towel rails on the back wall the other end from the showerhead. My eyes were soon riveted on Mark though, watching the water glide down over his pale skin.

"It's not a spectator sport." How the hell could he have known I was there. I hadn't made a sound, and his back was to me. He looked back over his shoulder at me. Pushing my self off the doorframe where I was leaning, I turned to leave. "Where do you think you're going?"

"I was under the impression you wanted me to leave," I said a little stiffly.

"I never said that. Strip and get in here." Half my clothes were on the floor before I knew my hands had moved. Throughout my younger days I had at times exhibited a bad attitude towards being bossed around. It had cost me a few jobs. My ex had always known to ask me to do stuff rather than ever tell me to. He had certainly known never to boss me around or act like I was his property. So why did none of it bother me when Mark did it?

Once I was in the shower Mark just handed me the soap and turned his back. Getting a good amount of lather I started to smooth my hands over his back, reaching up to the back of his neck. He spread his legs a little and braced as I pushed against him, working the muscles on either side of his spine in small circles moving up to reach the top of his shoulders before sliding down to the small of his back and starting all over again. Mark tilted his head to the side as I reached his neck again, allowing my hand to glide around the side until I could feel his beard tickle my fingers and a contented noise rumbled in his chest. To reach that high on him I had to press myself right against his back and I felt it vibrate through me setting up an answering tingle in my own body.

Sinking to my knees on the tiled floor behind him I put more soap on his legs, rubbing the muscles of his thighs and calves. He turned suddenly while I was on the floor, letting the hot water cascade down his back, washing the suds from his skin. I started to wash the front of him, starting from the ground this time, from his shins, up his thighs. Skirting around his burgeoning erection I stood up again and concentrated on his stomach and chest. It was harder to concentrate now as his eyes were on me, watching me with a hint of promise of what was to come.

He took in a sharp breath with a hiss when I hooked my fingers and scratched with what little fingernails I had across one soapy nipple, dragging them down almost to but just stopping short of his groin. Again moving up to his shoulders and neck I had to press myself right up against him, trapping his hardness in between our bodies. Mark moved to wrap his arms around me to press closer but I managed to wriggle away and gathered another load of lather in my hands. Stepping behind him to avoid his arms, I put my arms round him and wrapped my fingers around his length. One hand slid lower to cup his scrotum; fondling and gently massaging it while the other grasped and rubbed along his penis.

He let out a low groan as my hands picked up a steady rhythm before grabbing my wrists.

"Enough," he growled, stepping out of the circle of my arms and turning to face me. Stepping backwards he pulled me under the water with him. I let my head drop back and the water run down my throat and onto my chest. That meant my body from breasts downwards was pushed tight against Mark and I felt his hands encircle me and drop to my buttocks. He lifted me easily, my legs wrapping round him instinctively and my arms snaking around his neck. Two short steps found my back against the cold tiled wall. Mark attacked my mouth with all the raging energy he had shown the night before while one hand moved round to the front of my body and slid down, testing my readiness. He smirked against my lips as he felt the wetness gathered there, testament to the excitement I had found in my explorations of him.

Positioning himself quickly he slid into me, making me gasp at the suddenness of it. He set up a slow pace to begin with, withdrawing almost completely then returning so slowly to sit completely sheathed again. After a time I couldn't stand any more of this gentle pace and arched my back against the wall, pushing into him as hard as I could, gripping his shoulders with my hands and nipping sharply at his neck, jaw line, anything I could reach. Anything I could do in an attempt to spur him on to what I wanted. He chuckled and moved away from the wall, back towards the bedroom. He stopped before he reached the door and leant me back against the wall there, peeling my arms from round his neck and guiding my hands to the top of the towel rails.

Now I had something to help support my self with he began to do what I wanted, driving in hard and fast, almost shaking the breath from my body. The expression on his face was almost frightening in its intensity as he fixed on driving towards pleasure. My head rocked back against the wall as my orgasm hit and my body went rigid. He followed shortly after, pinning me against the wall with his body as he took deep gasping breaths to recover from the effort.

He lowered me to the ground. My legs, although a bit wobbly, supported my weight and he led me back under the water to wash off the sweat.

"Next time I'll make you scream," he said, a confident look on his face.

I snorted at his assertion. "No one has ever made me scream."

"Then I'll be the first." He reached out and turned off the water.

I took my stuff into his room that night. We agreed that there didn't seem to be any point in leaving it in the other one. Again I settled down to sleep in that huge bed with the massive man I seemed to have become involved with.

As I had promised Tara, I took my bike to the arena the next day, following Mark's Harley to Pasadena so I didn't get lost. The flat asphalt of the car park was far too tempting and I couldn't resist popping a wheelie across it before I parked up. Mark shook his head at me as I climbed off and removed my helmet, a huge grin on my face.

"What? Just cos you'd need a half mile run up to do that on one of your bikes!" I dodged the good-natured swipe he aimed at my backside and headed for the arena door, unzipping my leather jacket.

I found Tara in catering, sitting with her back to the door. "Hey!" I said cheerfully slipping into the seat opposite her. She looked up at me, her eyes red. "What's happened?"

"Jerry called again. We had a row. He says he's coming here, to take me home." She dissolved into sobs.

"He can't. You've got a contract. You have to work."

"He doesn't care. He's fed up with me never being home. He'll be here tonight."

"Well," I said comfortingly, "Don't tell him where your hotel is and you'll be fine."

"I always send a list of where I'm going to be staying to my Mom. She'll have told him." I looked up as Mark came in. "Can I stay with you for a couple of days?"

"Er…" I looked at Mark again. "I don't know…"

"Please!" she pleaded.

I took a deep breath, thinking hard. "Shouldn't you try and talk to him first? Tell him what you want?"

"I don't want to be alone with him. He'll just talk me down until I give in. He can get a little… rough." That got my attention quickly.

"Shit, Tara! Does he hit you?"

"Just once. He didn't like me talking to this guy." I was out of my depth now. I had never known anyone who had been through this and was just going on gut instincts.

"Do you want to be with him?"

"No." She began sobbing again as she admitted the fact.

"So you want to leave him." She nodded her agreement. "You need to tell him." Her eyes shot to mine, horrified.

"I can't! He'd kill me."

"Calm down. I might have an idea. Just let me talk to a few people."

I had found in the time that I had been working in the WWE that a lot of the guys were really nice people. I talked to a few of the ones I had come to know most and got their agreement to help in my idea. Going back to Tara, I got her to call Jerry and suggest that they met in a bar in Houston to talk. It meant that he was some way away from where Tara was staying and was also on the other side of the city to my place in case we ended up having to go back there.

That was how, after Smackdown, Tara ended up sitting at a table in a bar by herself, nervously twisting her hands together as she waited for Jerry to show up. At the next table, hopefully within earshot, I watched her anxiously from my position between Mark and Glen. Alongside us also sat Big Show, Dave Batista and Triple H. Batista had been a little leery of the idea after Tara's performance in the last bar they had been together in, but decided to help when told that Jerry had hit Tara in the past. Of this group I knew Triple H the least and was a little wary of him due to him having married one of the bosses but he seemed nice enough and had been keen to help when he heard the problem.

"Will you relax?" Mark muttered in my ear. "You're going to blow it before he even gets to the table. With any luck we won't be needed anyway." I nodded and sat back reluctantly. To distract myself for a second I leant across Mark to speak to Dave.

"Is it true you have your tongue pierced?" He grinned and stuck out his tongue, showing the stud in it. I grinned back and shivered a little.

"What?" Mark asked, puzzled.

"Nothing much. I just used to know a guy with a tongue piercing."

"And?" Dave prompted.

"I found it… entertaining," I admitted. He laughed and I sat back when I felt Mark gently pinch my thigh under the table. "What? It was years ago, and on another continent." I looked up at him. "Had a couple of tattoos as well. Seems to be a bit of a theme. Not _quite_ as many as you, I'll admit." My attention swung to the door as it opened and I recognised Jerry from the picture Tara had shown me. The tension must have shown in my body as Mark put a hand on my arm. We watched as unobtrusively as you could when most of the table topped the three hundred pound mark as Jerry spotted Tara and made his way to the table.

"You were supposed to be at the hotel getting your stuff together," he said, standing over her.

"We need to talk." Her voice was shaky but relatively calm.

"There's nothing to talk about. You are coming home with me." Jerry's voice was flat and brooked no refusal.

Tara was quiet for a few moments before replying almost too low for me to hear. "No I'm not. I love my job and I'm not leaving it."

"Damn it Tara, you are my wife and you will do as I tell you." He clenched his fists by his side. I began to fidget, getting nervous.

"Not until she asks us to," Glen murmured from my side.

Tara wiped her face quickly and looked up at Jerry. "I want a divorce."

"Hell no," Jerry ground out, grabbing her arm.

"Jade!" she called, scared now. I shot to my feet and hurried over.

"Hey! Maybe you should leave her alone."

Jerry turned and sneered at me. "Yeah? Who says?"

"We do," came a low growl from behind me. I stepped back and let the five men gather round Jerry. He dropped Tara's arm and held his hands out in front of himself.

"Hey now fellas. No need for you to get involved. I'm just having a little chat with my wife." He jerked a thumb towards Tara, who scooted out of her seat and joined me behind the five wrestlers.

"I don't think she has any more to say to you," Show rumbled.

"You know, I suggest you leave and go back home." Hunter spoke almost pleasantly. Out of the corner of my eye I could see the barman looking agitated.

"What the hell has this got to do with you?" Jerry burst out belligerently. "Which one are you sleeping with Tara? Or is it the whole lot at once? My momma always said you were a slut, not good enough for me."

"Take it outside," the barman called nervously. "Don't want any trouble in here."

"What do you reckon little man?" Mark spoke quietly. "Want to take this outside?" The tone of his voice made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. It was full of threat, making him sound like the man I had thought he was before getting to know him.

Jerry's eyes bulged. "I know you. Holy shit… you're the Undertaker!" He pointed to each man in turn, mouthing his name. The fight seemed to go out of him and he backed up towards the door. "This ain't over Tara," he called when he reached the door. "I'll find you." With that parting shot he disappeared into the night.

Tara sagged onto a chair sobbing as the reaction set in. I looked at her pitiful state and sighed. Looking round at the guys I asked "Could one of you follow me back to my place and bring her? I don't have a passenger seat on my bike, and she wouldn't be fit even if I did."

"We came together," Hunter said, pointing to Glen and Dave. "Sure we'll bring her over."

Mark stepped over to where I was standing with an arm round Tara's shoulders. "You want me to fetch your stuff?" He handed me my crash helmet.

"Please," I sighed.

"I'm sorry Jade," Tara said softly. "I didn't even ask you how your birthday was."

"It was fine. Quiet, but I enjoyed it." Dave looked at me.

"When was your birthday?" I could see that Mark was listening intently.

"Yesterday."

"Kept that pretty quiet. I'll see you back at your place," Mark muttered as he passed me on his way to the door.

We got Tara settled into the back seat of Glen's rental and said goodnight to Show, who told me to call him Paul. I climbed on my bike and threaded my way across the city, checking constantly to make sure they were still behind me. I just hoped that Jerry had gone and was not following us.

When we reached my building I pointed to a space outside and told them to wait while I put my bike away. When I got back round to the front I found Hunter carrying Tara.

"She fell asleep and we didn't want to wake her," he explained.

As I opened the front door, Mr Hall came bustling out of his apartment. He looked fit to have a nervous breakdown as he saw the people I was with this time, mouthing frantically while producing a string of inarticulate noises.

"Mr Hall, calm down," I laughed. "Taker will be coming by later on. Can you keep an ear out for him and let him up when he gets here?" Still unable to say a single understandable word, he nodded, and I led the way up the stairs.

Once inside my apartment I pointed to the bedroom door. "Can you put her on the bed?" She still didn't wake so I took her shoes off and put a blanket over her. Coming out, I looked at the three men standing around in my little kitchen, making it look truly tiny.

"Thanks guys. You want a coffee or drink or something?" Glen asked for coffee as he was driving so I put some on.

"What you got to drink?" Dave asked.

"Uh, there's beer in the fridge, vodka in the freezer or Jack on the shelf. Glasses are in the cupboard there. Help yourselves. I'm just going to get changed."

I came out five minutes later in a more comfortable pair of jeans and a T-shirt to find that Glen had got his own coffee, Hunter had a beer and Dave appeared to be well into my bottle of Jack. I walked over, topped up his glass and nicked the bottle, holding it up in the air.

"Here's to good Samaritans!" I laughed, taking a swig direct from the neck of the bottle and groaning contentedly as the fiery liquid bit a trail down into my stomach.

It was a bit surreal sitting there with these three famous men in my apartment. I was used to seeing them on a pretty much day-to-day basis when we were travelling, but they were here in my space, chatting happily and just shooting the shit. Glen and Hunter had each taken an armchair while Dave and I sat on the couch, making it easier to share the bottle of Jack. He had pretty much given up on his glass, claiming it was unfair and I got more than he did drinking from the bottle.

It must have been about an hour later when there was a tap at the door. Hauling myself to my feet, I staggered a little on the way to answer it, the drink going to my legs. Mark stepped inside and dropped my bag on the floor, glancing at the other three. Glen looked like he was about to nod off, Hunter had a small pile of empty beer bottles next to him and Dave appeared to have taken the Jack hostage.

"Having fun?" he asked with an ironic little smile.

"Sure. If I'm going to get drunk with a load of men, it's always the married ones. Makes life easier. Excuse me just a minute, I think I need to rescue my bottle." Just as I turned round, Dave waved the empty bottle at me. It had been about a third full, and we had drunk the lot between us. "OK, guess I'm onto coffee then."

"We should get going," Glen said, rising up from his chair. For the first time I noticed that he was slightly taller than Mark. I'd never noticed before. Hunter agreed and got to his feet. Dave seemed to think that as he had drunk all my Jack it was a good idea as well.

"Thanks again, guys. I really appreciate it, and I'm pretty sure Tara will when she wakes up as well." I shut the door behind them and turned back to Mark. "Ah well, it was a fun couple of days while it lasted."

"You think that's it now?" He sat on the end of the couch. I picked up the empties and dirty cup and glass and took them to the kitchen.

"I can't see her going back to the hotel. You heard him. I don't think he's going to give up that easily. You want some coffee?"

"What I want is you in my house and in my bed," he growled. I flushed a little at the intensity of his gaze.

"Me too, but it's not going to happen. Right now you can have coffee and that's it." I flicked the machine on and flopped onto the couch beside him. "Shit. I haven't drunk like that in a while."

"You make a habit of drinking with a load of men?" His tone was unreadable. I couldn't tell if he was just curious or angry in some way.

"I've always preferred male company. Get a group of women together and it can get bitchy. Men don't do that so much."

"So you get a kick out of it." I was taken aback by his statement.

"What are you, jealous or something?" His eyes flashed towards me and then away again. "What did you think I was going to do with three men in my apartment? Three married men at that?" He wouldn't look at me now. "OK," I continued, "Let's break it down into its elements. I like Glen. He's a nice bloke I can have a laugh with. But he has that whole shaven headed thing going on. Does nothing for me. Hunter I barely know, and I don't particularly like blondes. Dave… I'll admit I'd be there like a shot given half a chance. In different circumstances. I have never slept with a married man and never would. Besides, I'm involved in this… whatever the hell this is with us. I don't pretend to understand it but I'm in it and I'm not a cheat. Now, you want coffee or not?"

He got to his feet. "I think I'll head home." Still not looking at me he headed for the door. Jumping up I followed him.

"Mark, wait. I shouldn't have mouthed off like that. I'm sorry. I'm a bit drunk and pissed off that I'm not coming with you." He paused and swung back to face me.

"Batista?"

I groaned. "Forget what I said, will you? My mouth ran away with me. That would never happen for a whole list of reasons. The main thing is I'm involved with you and that is plenty good enough for me." I stood on tiptoes and brushed my lips across his. "Now get if you're going. I've got to get you to an autograph session in the morning."

He offered me a small smile and left. I poured myself a cup of coffee and hopped up to sit on the counter top. What the hell had just happened?

"Jade? I heard raised voices?" Tara came out of my room. "How did I get in here anyway?"

"Hunter carried you up after you fell asleep in the car. There's coffee if you want." She nodded and got herself a cup from the rack.

"So what was the shouting about?"

"First off, I wasn't shouting. Mark and I had… a little disagreement I suppose I would call it. Nothing for you to worry about. Just drink your coffee and get some sleep." She drained her mug and headed back to the bedroom. I resigned my self to a night on the couch and turned in after finishing my own drink.


	7. Chapter 7

When she got up the next morning, Tara asked me if she could stay until we left Texas. I felt I couldn't say no – she was plainly terrified that Jerry was going to come after her. Giving up on the idea of being able to ride my bike, I hired a car so we could travel back and forth together. She felt safe at the arena as no one could get in without a pass and everything was being moved to the arena in Houston for the pay per view the next day.

As soon as we were both ready to go we left and picked up the car. I had to get there to see Karen and pick up my list for the autograph session. She was in a makeshift office in the new arena, pacing up and down and swearing loudly.

"What's up?"

"Jade! Am I glad to see you! Look, there's been a mix up. I've got two talents being interviewed at the same time and I've got no-one to escort the second one."

"I'm free as soon as this morning's session is over if that's any help?"

"Right. It's champ and challenger ready for tomorrow night. I'll stick with Triple H, so you get the challenger. That OK? He's on your session this morning anyway, so you can figure it out between you from there. The interview is at two, at the TV studio." She handed me a piece of paper with directions on it.

"Don't shoot me for not paying attention, but who is it?" She frowned at me and then laughed.

"Someone else distracting you, huh? I guess up until now this stuff hasn't been important for your job, but it will be from now on, so you'd better start having a clue. It's Batista. You did tell Peter that you had sorted out that little problem?" She tilted her head on one side.

"Oh yeah, that's fine now." 'Yeah, that problem is done, it's just the next one I have to worry about,' I thought.

The cue for the session was absolutely immense. As in the last session I had attended, Hunter and Batista were there, along with Mark, Rey Mysterio and Randy Orton. I hadn't seen Randy since the first time we had met and he still came across as arrogant although to be fair we were in public and he had to maintain his character. Quite why that had to go to the extent of clicking his fingers at me any time he wanted something I didn't know.

The session finally ended and I helped Karen to clean up. Mark hadn't so much as glanced at me all morning but I tried not to read anything into it, as he had been pretty busy. I jumped as a shadow loomed over me and turned to see him behind me.

"Hey," I said softly, standing from where I had been crouching to pack water bottles back into a cooler.

"You coming to get some lunch?" He spoke as if nothing had happened. I was just about to reply when an arm dropped across my shoulders.

"Sorry Taker, but she's mine for the afternoon." I closed my eyes for a second and prayed to any deity that cared to listen that when I opened them again this situation would have gone away. When I opened them, however, Mark was still standing in front of me and Batista's arm was still across my shoulders.

"I have to take him to an interview." He jerked his head once then turned and walked away.

"Trouble in paradise?" Dave inquired.

I snorted. "Not exactly trouble. Just a misunderstanding."

"Oh. Come on, I'll take you to lunch instead." His grin was so infectious I couldn't help returning it at him and slid my arm round his waist as we headed for the car. It was nothing more than a friendly gesture, something I had always done with my friends. The roaring of a big bike engine told me that someone else didn't see it that way. I stopped and dropped my arm from Dave's back, rubbing my face with my hands.

"What is it?" Dave sounded a little concerned as I linked my hands behind my neck and swore viciously at the sky.

"Come off it. I remember what happened the last time I told you anything. In six hours it was round pretty much the whole company." I glared at him.

"That was different. It was funny watching you squirm. This looks more serious. How long until this interview?"

"Uh, couple of hours."

"Right then, let's find somewhere quiet to eat and you can tell me what's up." He strode away towards the car, supremely confident that I would follow him. Which I did of course, as it was what I was paid for.

We found a place in a quiet side street and ordered. Comfort eating all the way, I picked a huge burger with everything on it and my ultimate misery item, a thick chocolate milkshake. It didn't really fit with Dave sat there in his sharp suit, but then neither did my slightly scruffy jeans or T-shirt.

"Talk," he prompted as we waited for the food.

"Where to begin? Actually it's simple enough. Taker seems to have taken a dislike to something I did; I shot my mouth off and said something I shouldn't have done, and he is pissed off about it."

"What did you do?" he asked, brow raised quizzically.

I decided to tailor the truth just a little and hope he didn't see through it. "Went drinking with some guys."

"Like who?"

"Just some guys. You know, friendly drink, talking, just that kind of shit. He didn't like it and I was a little too drunk to watch what I said. I've been warned he can be a bit, well, territorial, but I've always tended to go out with the guys rather than the girls. It's just how I am."

"So then what happened?"

"He asked me if I did it often. If I got a 'kick' out of it. So I asked him if he was jealous. When he wouldn't answer me I went through the list of people I'd been with, explaining why I wouldn't sleep with them." I flushed a bit as I said that. We sat back as the food was delivered and I took a hit from my milkshake.

"Go on," he said when I put the glass down.

"I told him that most of them weren't my type, but then made the mistake of saying that I would go with one of them if the chance came up and things were different. It would never happen, and even if there was the offer I wouldn't anyway. The guy is married and I'm involved with Taker. It was just hypothetical but definitely the wrong thing to say."

I glanced up when he didn't reply and saw him looking at me appraisingly, an amused twist to his mouth.

"So," he said finally with an evil little smirk on his face, "Which one of the three of us did you tell him you'd sleep with then?" So much for hoping he didn't see through the stupidly simple attempt at deception.

I know I went bright red. I could feel the heat in my face. "It doesn't matter. Just drop it, please. It doesn't help." I pushed the remains of my food away, any appetite destroyed by embarrassment.

"OK! Just curious, that's all. Is it shaven heads or big noses that do it for you?" I stopped myself from answering him. Lucky, considering that my answer would have been 'Neither', giving myself away. It's odd how something that is just there but not really affecting you in any way can become all consuming if you have to confront it in any way. Like the fact of looking at some one and thinking 'wouldn't mind a piece of that!' Now I was sat opposite an example of that very thought having handed him on a plate, so to speak, a shortlist of three men I had to work with, one of whom I would sleep with given the opportunity. And he himself was on that list. Still, to look on the bright side, my day couldn't get any worse.

"Just eat, will you? We're going to be late otherwise." He set about his food, that teasing grin still appearing from time to time.

As it was we made to the TV studio just in time for the make up girl to give him a quick once over. She stood next to me behind the cameras as the interview was shot, sighing occasionally with a dreamy expression.

"Your job must be great," she whispered to me as there was a break in filming.

"It has its plus points and minus points."

"I can't see any minus points from here," she laughed, looking Dave up and down.

I laughed, my mood lightening. "Oh no, there aren't many visual minus points."

It was late afternoon when we left the studio and hopped back into the car.

"Right. Where do you want to go, arena or hotel?" I asked, turning on the engine.

"Drop me at the hotel. I need to go work out. Didn't have time this morning." There was a mental picture – glistening sweat, muscles standing out as he worked. I shook my head briskly and moved out into traffic.

"What?" he asked, bemused. I just shook my head again. "Pull over here," he said suddenly. I parked up and watched him go into a liquor store, coming out with a brown paper bag that he propped on the floor by his feet. We got to the hotel and I parked outside the door.

"There you go."

"Here," he said, holding out the bag. I took it and removed a bottle of Jack.

"You didn't have to do that." I smiled at the thought.

"No problem. If you get fed up I'll come drink it with you."

"Nice idea, but best not." I stowed the bottle in the glove compartment. He tilted his head, giving me a questioning look. "For one I've got Tara staying with me until we leave here. And two, I just don't think it would be a good idea."

"Taker?" I nodded. "Tell me something," he said, turning slightly in the car seat. I looked at him, jumping when he put out a hand and gripped my chin lightly. "It's me, isn't it?" There was a supremely confident look on his face. I tried to duck away but he held me tight. Seeing no way out of it I nodded my agreement. He let go of my chin and put a hand on the door handle. "Why wouldn't you?"

"You're married. And I'm with Taker. Well, I think so anyway. Besides, just because I would do something doesn't mean it would happen. Now could you please get out of my car so I can drive it off something high?" I felt as if eggs could be fried on my cheeks. He got out and bent over in the door for one last comment.

"I'll still come drink it with you if you like. As long as you swear to protect me from your friend." He shut the door and walked into the hotel without a backward glance.

A short time later I got to the arena and went to find Tara.

"You look flustered," she commented as I threw myself into a chair.

"Just made a total idiot of myself. You know, ground open up and swallow me now kind of stupid."

"It can't be that bad. You ready to head back yet?" She finished organising her things. "We need to stop by the hotel so I can get my stuff."

Tara seemed to have recovered herself quickly and was back to chattering at me about her favourite subject and the fact that he had helped her the night before made her even surer of progress. I tolerated it in the car, while we were collecting her stuff from the hotel room and in the elevator. By the time the doors opened for us to step out into the lobby I'd had enough. I took one step out and turned to face her.

"Why the hell don't you just proposition him and see what happens? Get it over with." When she didn't reply, I looked up at her face to see her mouth hanging open slightly and colour on her cheeks.

"Sounds like an interesting idea. Why don't you try it some time?" I screwed my eyes shut and turned round. On opening them I saw Dave in front of me, laughing. And I had thought earlier that my day couldn't get any worse. I tried desperately to find some element I could laugh at and failed.

"Yeah, well, if you ever get divorced and fancy a pity fuck you know where I live. Come on Tara, there's a fifth of Jack with my name on it outside." I stomped out of the hotel without looking back to see if she was following.

The drive home was completely silent. Not a single word was spoken until we were actually inside the apartment.

"What the hell was that all about?" Tara shot out as she put her bags on the floor.

I took a deep breath. "That whole making an idiot of myself thing?" She nodded. "It involved Dave Batista. I sort of managed to tell him that I would sleep with him."

"What? When?"

"Calm down Tara. I didn't mean that I _am_ going to sleep with him. Just that I would if he wasn't married and offered."

"But…" She was part confused, part annoyed at me wandering into her 'territory'.

"Look, he _is_ married and even if he wasn't he'd be very unlikely to want me. I'm just the very ordinary looking gofer who's paid to run him around and pick up after him. I'm going to take a very long, very hot shower and then have a very serious conversation with that bottle over there. There's a take out menu by the phone. Pick what you want. All the stuff I eat has a mark next to it."

After ten minutes in a shower almost hot enough to strip skin I got out and picked up the bottle of Jack. Ripping the top off I took a good long swallow, wincing as it burned all the way down.

"What are you doing?" Tara asked.

"Something I haven't done for about eight years. Getting stupidly, mindlessly drunk. I once drank three quarters of one of these." I brandished the bottle at her. "Guess you're driving to the arena in the morning."

I was still sober enough to pay the delivery driver for the take out. I wasn't hungry but eat some anyway, reasoning that I was probably going to be throwing up a lot some when in the near future and it hurt a lot less if there was something to throw up. Tara kept throwing anxious little glances at me. The entire time I had been working for the WWE I had been very controlled, apart from one temper outburst in Seattle, but now I was letting go in a big way. Digging out a packet of cigarettes, I worked my way steadily through a quarter of a pack in an hour and a half, along with nearly a quarter of the bottle. I never noticed Tara go into the bedroom with my phone.

When I got to that awful giddy stage of being drunk I eased up a bit. I hated the feeling of my head spinning while I was sitting still and waited for it to diminish before attacking the bottle again.

Things got a bit fuzzy after that. I had a vague impression of someone coming to the door and Tara letting them in. I was made to drink what I was told was vodka but tasted like water, and loads of it, at least a pint. Then I was laid somewhere warm and soft, the bottle prised out of my hand. I tried to complain but eventually sleep overtook me.

Ever felt like you want to cut off your own head with a rusty saw to put yourself out of your misery? I hadn't drunk seriously in a couple of years, never getting beyond mildly staggering. It felt as if my head was trying to implode, or rather, how I imagined it would feel.

Heavy drinking had always had the same effects on me. I didn't get many hangovers, but they were always monsters when I did. The one thing that had never happened to me was forgetting what I had done or said. I remembered pretty much every detail of the day before which didn't help the extreme nausea at all.

I remembered hurling drunken abuse at the person Tara had let in. The kind that sounds perfectly clear and articulate in your head but when it comes out of your mouth it's a vague blur of meaningless syllables with the occasional swear word thrown in. The most coherent sentence had been something like "Wha' fuck you want?" The only thing I didn't remember with crystal clarity was who it had been.

Groaning quietly I rolled off the couch in a bundle of blankets and crawled towards the bathroom, not entirely sure whether I wanted to vomit or drown myself in the toilet. The choice was taken out of my hands when I got there. After what felt like an eternity I was able to get shakily to my feet and staggered out to the kitchen.

"So, you're up." Tara's voice cut through my head, making me whimper pathetically. "I was told to make sure you took this when you got up." She was holding a glass with what appeared to be that hangover cure with the raw egg in it. I doubled back to the bathroom and reappeared fifteen minutes later. The glass was still on the counter. "You're not going anywhere until you drink that." I looked at it for a few seconds. Anything that made me feel better than I did right then had to be good, so I pinched my nose tightly and choked it down. "You've got twenty minutes to get showered and dressed, then I'm leaving for the arena." I flapped a hand at her.

A good shower can work wonders. I still felt like shit, but more human than I had. Dragging the first set of clothes I came to out of the closet, I pulled them on and tied my hair back.

Once at the arena Tara stationed me in catering with a huge jug of coffee, leaving me with strict instructions to stay there. I was on the second mug and actually beginning to feel quite good when I felt a prickling sensation up the back of my neck. Someone was behind me. Turning slowly so as not to reawaken the hangover monster too much I took in the jeans and black shirt next to me. Tipping back slightly I followed the form upwards to the face.

"Mark," I said quietly.

"You want to explain to me why I got a call from a scared little mouse tellin' me you were about to drink yourself to death?" He talked in a low voice, thick with tension.

"That was you? Tara called you?" I couldn't believe it.

"You scared the hell out of her. And seein' the state of you when I got there, I'm not surprised." His accent was heavy as he spoke.

I sighed and rested my head in my hands. "I fucked up royally, didn't I?"

"You make a habit of it? My eyes shot to him, unsure if he was asking me or trying to make a weak joke.

"I don't try, but it tends to happen." He sat down opposite me. I poured another cup of coffee and stared at it. Anything to avoid having to look at him.

"And what about…?"

I glanced up at him. "It's nothing, honestly. I should have kept my mouth shut. All it is, you know how you see someone on the TV or walking down the street and you think 'wouldn't mind showing that a good time!' but it doesn't actually mean a damn thing." Batista chose that moment to walk in to catering and I ducked my head in embarrassment.

"If it doesn't mean a damn thing, why are you doing that?" He was sounding tense again.

"I kind of told him." My head lifted up at the noise that came from Mark's throat. "He wanted to know what was up. I tried to tell him without going into specifics, but he guessed what I was talking about, and that it was him." I shrugged. "That's all."

"Uhuh." He stole the mug of coffee from in front of me and drank it straight down.

"You know, you'd kick my backside if I did that to you, wouldn't you?" I was pleased to see him smile.

"Damn right, darlin'. I've got to go run through my match for tonight. You coming down to the ring?" Stealing the mug back from him, I poured the last of the coffee into it.

"Yep. Lead on boss." It looked like things were going to be OK. As per usual when it came to Mark, things just happened without me understanding what the hell was going on, and I just went with the flow.

"You're Jade, right?" A voice called to me as I walked alone along the corridor. I could never keep up with Mark when he decided to get a hustle on. Turning, I saw a tall blonde woman, maybe five or so years younger than me.

"That's right. Can I help you?" She was tall, blonde and slender. I hated her instantly. Well, not really but she was just so typical of the women I was around every day. It made me feel short and a bit chunky.

"I'm Annie. I'm a new Diva and they told me you would sort out somewhere for me to stay. There was a mess up with my hotel reservation. I'm here to get a feel of the company before I have my debut." She looked down at me, literally. She must have been just under six feet tall.

"Uh, OK. I was just about to watch a practice session in the ring. Let me just grab my file from the office and I'll call them from there." By the time I got back to her I had already managed to sort out for her to take Tara's bed sharing with Nina, another make up artist. The hotel was booked solid otherwise. She looked down her nose a bit at having to share with back room staff but perked up when we got out into the arena.

"Oh my God! It's the Undertaker!" Her eyes were wide as she watched Mark stretching against the ropes. I had to laugh, as her reaction was so similar to mine when I had first started work here.

"Yeah. You'll get used to that. Here comes his opponent for tonight." I pointed up the ramp to where Booker T was strolling down, rolling his neck and shoulders. "So, you here as a wrestler or a valet?"

"Bit of both eventually. I trained in England for a while and have been on the indie circuit for a couple of years over here. So, you know the Undertaker?" She was obviously a fan.

"Well, yeah. I mean I've spoken to pretty much all of them one way or another. Taker the most though."

She glanced back towards the ring. "He's married, right?" I couldn't help rolling my eyes.

"Divorced actually. He's seeing someone on and off. I think it's on at the moment." There was no need to tell her _who _he was seeing. She gave a dismissive little sniff.

"Pretty much available then. Who isn't attached?" Looked like she was a star fucker then. Maybe I was being harsh, but then that wouldn't be the first question I asked when walking into a new job. Although, this wasn't exactly like any other place I had ever worked.

"Tell me who you have your eye on, and I'll tell you what I know. Although I don't know everything. Oh, looks like he's going old school." I gestured to where Mark and Booker were rehearsing the walk along the top rope. "Tell you what, after we've finished watching this, how about I take you round to meet a few people."

The walk through finished when Mark made as if to set Booker up for the tombstone. I hopped off the security walling and picked up two bottles of water I had picked up when sorting out Annie's hotel room.

"You want?" I asked Booker as I handed the other one to Mark. The not so subtle sound of a throat being cleared behind me made me wince. "Sorry. Taker, Booker, this is Annie, a new Diva."

"Hi," she almost purred. "Pleased to meet you." She appeared to be exactly what I had imagined the WWE Divas to be like. She knew she looked good and worked it to its full extent. Both men said hello to her, then Booker excused himself, saying he wanted to get showered.

"I said I'd take Annie round to meet a few people before it gets too mad in here. Are you staying here, coming back later?" I stepped up to Mark.

"I've got some stuff I want to pick up from home. I'll be back about an hour before show time. There's talk of going to a club after the show tonight. You feel like going?" He tilted his head and looked at me out of the corner of his eye. I was just about to answer when Annie spoke.

"That sounds great. I'd love to go." My jaw dropped just a little. Raising my eyebrows I glanced back to Mark.

"Yeah, the hangover's gone. I'm up for it although I'll need to go home and get some clothes."

"Give me your keys. I'll pick something out for you." A little smirk just flashed across his lips as I pulled my keys out of my pocket and handed them over. He started up the ramp. "Just one more thing," he said, turning back to me. "You think you can behave yourself?"

"Probably not," I grinned. "Why? What are you going to do to me if I don't?"

"That, darlin', is something you may not want to find out. I'll see you later. Annie." He inclined his head towards and then strode up the ramp. Annie looked back at me with an amazed expression.

"Do you talk to them all like that? And hand over your hotel key?"

"No. Well, I can have a laugh with some of them. Taker's special though. And I live in Houston. That was my apartment key I gave him. Come on, there should be a few people around now." I headed on up the ramp and into the back stage area.

"Your apartment key? What does his girlfriend think of that?" I burst out laughing just as we reached the open doorway of Adam and Amy's dressing room.

"What's cheered you up? You looked like shit this morning." Adam poked his head round the door to see what the noise was.

"Thanks a lot! Edge, Lita, meet Annie, the new Diva. She just asked me what Taker's girlfriend thought of me giving him my apartment key.

Adam grinned. "I think it's safe to say she doesn't mind. Hi Annie. Welcome to the madhouse."

Amy stepped round the door. "Are you OK Jade? I've been hearing rumours of a row."

"Yeah, it's all sorted now I think. Seems to be back to business as usual anyway. I'm just going to take Annie round who's here before I start on my lists for the next jaunt. See you guys later."

"So what's the deal with them?" Annie asked as we walked away.

"They are actually dating. Edge has a strange sense of humour. I'm sure you'll get to see it fairly soon." We came across several people for Annie to meet, including Glen, Hunter, Shawn and Lashley along with several other Divas. Annie's behaviour towards the other women was markedly different to the men. I supposed that she was used to being the beautiful one whereas now she was pretty much just one of several.

The last person we met made me feel rather awkward. I had just been saying that we seemed to have found everyone that was there when Batista came around the corner. Annie's eyes lit up and she elbowed me practically into him.

"Jade? Something I can do for you?" He grinned at me, teasing as if it had all been a huge joke.

"Not really. I just wanted to introduce you to Annie."

"I'm the new Diva." She interrupted me quickly, stepping in front and holding out her hand. Seemed like he was her favourite.

"Er, I'll show you back to catering and then I have got some work to do. See you later, Dave." I headed past him, relieved that I had got through speaking to him without blushing idiotically.

"Jade?" I turned back, almost bumping into Annie.

"Yes?"

"You OK? That was pretty mean."

I smiled faintly. "It's fine. Really. Forget about it." Facing back towards catering, I took a couple of quick breaths and continued on my way.

"What was that about?" Annie asked curiously.

"Nothing much. Just a conversation we had yesterday while I took him to an interview. Here we are, catering. I'll leave you here as I really do get ready to leave here tomorrow."

"Wait a minute. Tell me about Batista."

"What do you want to know?"

"What's he like? Is he seeing anybody?"

"Ah. He's married. Happily as far as I'm aware. Got an evil temper at times, but usually he's pretty much OK to deal with. The only other thing I know is he drinks Jack Daniels." I shrugged. It wasn't a whole lot of information.

"How do you know what he drinks? Surely the back stage people and stars don't mix." I frowned at her.

"We do sometimes. He and I have been in the same group drinking two or three times fairly recently. It's not unheard of. Sometimes they even date. As for the Jack, he finished mine off last night. Several of them came over." I didn't really know why I was explaining myself to her and shut up, leaving her before I said anything else.

I fetched my lists from the office and settled down to the boring but necessary task of making sure that everyone who was flying to the next destination had a plane seat and hotel accommodation the other end, at least on paper. Tara dropped by as I moved on to the car rentals list.

"Feeling better?" she asked archly.

"I know. I'm sorry. I've already had the lecture about how I scared you so much you called Mark." I sat back in my chair and ran a hand through my hair. "You met the new Diva yet?" She shook her head. "A piece of work from what I can see. And she has her sights set on our championship challenger. I told her the score but we'll have to wait and see. She has some issues with them and us socialising. It could be interesting. She's invited herself along tonight I think. You coming?"

"I was planning on crashing straight after the show. Soon as I can get everything cleaned up and ready for tomorrow. Do you mind?"

"Course not. You'll just have to remind me that Mark has my keys. He's picking me up some clothes for tonight." She snorted, making me throw her a puzzled look.

"Sweetheart, never let men pick out clothes for you. You think it was bad when I chose your outfit? You'll have to come find me when you've changed, just so I can see what he brought you." She laughed again and stood back up. "Only a couple of hours to go. I'd better get organised. Catch you later."

By the time I had finished the car list, it was time to go and watch the pre show build up.


	8. Chapter 8

The show went brilliantly. I watched it all on a monitor just back from the gorilla area. Annie picked the same spot to watch as well. It was an interesting place to see everything, as the wrestlers would walk up and down past us as they waited in the final few minutes before their match. Glen spent a little while psyching himself into Kane, fixing his face into a permanent snarl before he and Show went out to thrash MNM. They finished with synchronised choke slams on the pair of them. Now he was back to being the Deadman, Mark also went through a personality change before his match, becoming cold and detached. His match went exactly as the walk through had done, and he did his famous pose in the pin, crossing Booker's arms over his chest and leaning over him, tongue stuck right out.

"I can think of a few things for him to do with that!" Annie muttered in my ear as Mark stood and had his arm raised by the referee. She seemed to have decided to be a bit friendlier towards me.

"Hmm, couldn't we all," I replied, watching the monitor as he strode up the ramp after his celebrations. Booker had already gone past, rubbing a sore spot on his thigh. "Hey, good job!" I called as Mark came round the corner. He smiled, Deadman put away until the next match.

"You coming to get your stuff?"

"I just want to watch the championship match." I pointed to where Hunter was waiting, belt over his shoulder. Batista was standing right by the entrance, waiting for his cue to get out there. "I'll come find you as soon as it's over. "What did you bring, anyway?"

His smile widened. "You'll have to wait and see." He moved away, limping slightly.

"What's up with him?" Annie asked.

I shrugged. "You know pile drivers are hell on the knees. He's done them more than most."

"I guess he's not getting any younger, either."

"Maybe not, but I wouldn't recommend letting him hear you say that. Oh, here we go." It was always going to be a good match, and it lived up to expectations. The sledgehammer made an appearance but got used on Hunter behind the referee's back when Batista ripped it out of his hand. Once the match was over and Batista was parading the belt round the ring, I got to my feet and stretched.

"Do you know where we are supposed to be meeting?"

"I don't. I'll just go and find Taker and stick with him. If you wait near the back door, everyone should go out that way." I left to go to Mark's locker room.

Sticking my head round the door when there was no reply to my knock, I heard the water running. Recognizing my holdall sitting on a chair I opened it up to see what clothes he had picked for me. Tara's words about men and picking clothes echoed in my mind as I looked at the contents of the bag. I was stuck with it though. There was no way he'd let me go back home and get something else. With an amused smile, I got changed. Mark came out of the shower as I was pulling my boots on.

"I think I've changed my mind," he said, looking me up and down. "How about I just take you home?"

"Oh no." I shook my finger at him. "I'm all dressed up and we do have somewhere to go so get some clothes on."

"You sure you want me to?" He dropped his towel and advanced towards me. I backed up and crossed my arms, tapping my foot on the concrete floor. "OK, OK, I get the message." He turned back and started pulling on his clothes.

His reaction to how I looked made me feel good. He'd picked out a tight fitting top made of a fine black mesh together with a black suede skirt that rode low enough on my hips for the dragon on my lower back to peek his head over the top and only just long enough to cover the wolf on my thigh. If I got my sensible head on I knew I looked OK. Not a stunning beauty, but definitely OK.

Annie was the only one by the door when I got there slightly ahead of Mark. She was wearing a few small scraps of cloth masquerading as clothes. Even with me wearing heels, she towered over me. She looked me over, one eyebrow arched up high. Suddenly a friendly smile came over her face and she stepped closer, trying to look as if we were having a friendly chat. I heard footsteps behind me and glanced over my shoulder to see Mark approaching.

"You two are really good friends then?" Her eyes flicked between the two of us.

I'd finished playing games with her. Walking over to him, I leant my back against him, resting my head on his chest. "Kind of." I heard and felt a low chuckle rumble through his chest and he put an arm round my waist, pulling me flush against him.

"You and him?" She sounded incredulous.

"Amazing, isn't it?" A voice came from down the corridor. "No-one can understand how she puts up with the cantankerous old asshole. But she manages somehow." Glen grinned as he drew level.

"You are in so much shit next time we have a match!" Mark growled.

"Come on boys, play nicely in front of the new girl. Don't want to scare her!" I patted Mark on the arm and grinned back at Glen. "She needs a little time to get used to you lot."

It was a large group of people who went outside and began to filter into cars. Annie seemed to have become shy amongst them all en masse and tacked onto me. She kept throwing little glances between Mark and me as she strode beside us. We seemed to have surprised her – the big famous star and the ordinary little back room girl.

There weren't quite enough seats to go round and no one else could be persuaded to drive so that meant there had to be some sitting on laps. Didn't bother me any as I slid onto Mark, snuggling in against his chest. Annie sat in the middle of the seat, Glen on her other side. I hadn't seen who was driving the car, but I found out soon after we moved off.

"Damn it," I muttered in Mark's ear. "You could have told me Cena was driving!"

"Hey, I heard that!"

It was a great night. The club played a wide variety of music and the fans were well behaved and not too pushy. Everyone just relaxed and had a good time although I did stick firmly to just drinking beer.

It was some stupid time of the morning when we finally dragged ourselves out of there and piled back into the cars. Mark had to give instructions on how to get to my building, as I didn't have a clue where we were.

"I'll fetch my bike and come back," he said just before I climbed out.

I nodded. "Night guys," I called out to the others and headed for the door. Once inside the lobby, I sat on the bottom step to wait for him. If I'd gone upstairs and sat down, I would have fallen asleep and not heard him when he came back. It wasn't far from there to the arena anyway and it wasn't long before he was back. I stood and opened the door when I heard the big engine draw up outside and cut out.

"Keys," he demanded when he saw my trying unsuccessfully to smother an enormous yawn. I handed them over and he picked me up, carrying me all the way up the stairs and into the apartment. Tara was asleep under a blanket on the couch. Mark put me down on my feet and I led the way quietly into my bedroom. Shutting the door behind me I turned to look at him, and gave another huge yawn.

"Bed. Sleep."

"You staying?" I asked, starting to do as I was told. He didn't answer, just stripped himself quickly and climbed into the bed. Chuckling to myself, I did the same and snuggled into him. Sleep came soon after my head hit the pillow.

Life fell into a pattern after that. Travelling round the country, sorting out mess-ups when they occurred. Sharing hotel rooms seriously cut down my sex life until I started spending far more time in arena locker rooms. Whenever Mark had a room to himself, I would generally stay with him. Although it was still impossible to quantify exactly what we had, I grew comfortable with the situation. No words had ever been spoken but we both seemed content with each other.

During those few weeks I also managed to get my head round the whole Batista thing and was able to talk to him like before, almost as if the whole embarrassing episode had never happened. I reasoned that he would be pretty used to knowing that a significant proportion of the women round him would love to jump into his bed and the problem was just in my head, nothing to do with him.

Tara also returned to her normal self as time went on, especially when we reached the point at which she hadn't sent any information about where she was staying back to her mother. Nothing more had been heard from Jerry, and she had started divorce proceedings against him.

As the weeks passed, one thing began to occupy my mind more than anything else. Soon I was going home for the first time since this had all blown up. It had only been a few short months since I had been there last, but sometimes it felt like forever. It really dawned on me when I got on the plane to fly to the UK. Settling into my coach class seat next to Tara I sighed softly.

"Excited to be going home?"

"Yes and no." She looked puzzled. "It'll be great to see my family. I've missed them. But I know that Mum will try to get me to stay. And I still haven't told her who I work for. She thinks it's a happy coincidence that we can see Raw while I'm here."

"Will you tell her?"

"I guess I'll have to. I was thinking of taking her backstage after the show; soften her up towards the idea. Although, she knows I'm seeing someone who works for the same company and she'll want to know who it is." I rubbed at my eyes with my fists.

"And you think she'd have a problem with him."

I nodded. "She's a great fan of the Undertaker as a wrestler. I don't think she'd welcome with open arms the fact that we're sleeping together. I know her – she'll say he's too old and she hates tattoos. She moaned like hell when Ben got his, and he could never do wrong as far as she was concerned. But it's not like I'm going to be here forever. I'll weather the storm and then climb on the plane when it's time to go."

She pursed her lips. "What does Taker think?"

"I haven't asked him. I suppose I should, but I doubt he'll care much one way or the other. You know him, he does his own thing regardless of anyone else."

"I guess that's true."

In a strange way it was very exciting exiting the plane onto home soil at Heathrow. I knew that I had changed a lot before I ever left the UK, but I had changed even more while I was away. In some ways I was an almost completely different person to the one who had climbed onto a plane at Heathrow bound for the USA.

The usual chaos ensued while everyone got sorted with cars and rooms. It was always a huge relief when everything worked out right, and it had done this time. Once I was settled and in my own room shared as usual with Tara, I collapsed on the bed and dialled my mother's number. She picked up on the third ring.

"Hello?"

"Hi Mum. Just thought I'd let you know I've safely landed on British soil again!"

"Oh good. Are you in London?"

"Yep. I'm pretty tired though. Listen, you want me to come down and pick you two up tomorrow?"

Mum laughed gently. "Oh no, sweetheart, we'll make our own way and meet you outside the arena."

"Are you sure? I know how much you both hate driving in London. I don't mind coming down."

"Honestly, it's fine. What time do you want to meet?"

"Uh, the show starts at seven thirty, so how about quarter to, outside the main door?"

"Alright darling. We'll see you there. Sleep well!"

I was definitely a little puzzled. I knew full well that both my mother and my sister loathed London and had been convinced that I would have to go and pick them up. Mum definitely hated using the train as well. Still, it meant I didn't have to contend with the M25, the motorway that was more like the great European car park.

"I suppose you'll be spending the night elsewhere," Tara commented as I hung up the phone.

"Nah, Mark's sharing this time. I'll just have to put up with your snoring." I laughed as a pillow hit the side of my head, coupled with an indignant statement that she did not snore.

An early night was followed by a fairly early trip to the arena in the morning. There wasn't a lot for me to do, but it beat hanging around in a hotel room. It did, however, give me a chance to talk to Mark after his practice.

"You look thoughtful. Always worries me," he said as he changed back into his street clothes.

"Hey, I'm a natural brunette. Thinking is allowed." I stuck my tongue out at him.

"I'd put that away unless you feel like using it," he growled.

"Actually, I was thinking. I'm going to tell Mum exactly what I do tonight."

"Uhuh."

"And she knows that I've been seeing someone I work with. She's going to want to know more."

He buckled his belt. "You ashamed or something?"

"No! I just think I know how she'll react. And I doubt you'll want to do the 'meet the family' thing." He just looked at me, not answering. "Come on, how likely is it that this is a forever and always thing? I mean, it all started just because we were being talked about. Eventually you'll meet someone else you want to spend your life with. I can't pretend that I'll be happy when it happens, but I know it will."

"What the hell brought this on?" He got to his feet and began stuffing things into his bag angrily.

"Nothing 'brought it on'. It's pretty much what I've always thought. What happens, happens, remember? If I had a problem with it, I wouldn't be here."

He thought deeply for a moment. "You bringing her backstage?" I nodded. "Bring her here and we'll take it from there."

"Thanks," I said, putting a hand on his arm.

"Don't get so jumpy. I've got used to havin' you around, darlin'." He left the locker room suddenly, leaving me feeling slightly blown away. It was the closest we had ever come to talking about us, and I liked the sound of his last comment.

Despite having said I would meet my mother and sister outside at quarter to seven, I was out there just before half past six. Leaning against a wall just to one side of the doors, I chatted with the security guard and smoked a couple of cigarettes in quick succession.

"I thought you said you were giving up!" I swung round and hugged my mother, nearly strangling her. "I'm pleased to see you too!" she smiled, standing back to look at me. "You've lost more weight I see."

"Oh, it's so good to see you, Mum!"

"Now, I have a surprise for you. Your sister couldn't come, so look who I persuaded to come along with me!" She sounded thoroughly pleased with herself. I saw why when I looked past her and straight into the eyes of my ex-husband. That explained how they had got there at least. Ben certainly didn't mind London.

"Ben," I said flatly.

"Jade. You're looking well."

"Got a new fiancée I hear."

"That's right. She's fine, thanks for asking. And how about this Mark of yours I've heard about?"

I snorted. "I don't think I'd go so far as to call him my Mark, at least not to his face. But he's OK. You want anything before we go find our seats? Soda or something?"

"You sound so American, dear," Mum said. "Yes, a drink would be nice."

I led the way into the arena, keeping her between Ben and me. I couldn't believe she done this. The first time I'd seen her in months and she just had to bring him along. Grabbing some sodas, she caught me up on the family gossip. Topped off by a cousin who had scandalously left his wife to run off with the next-door neighbour. The male next-door neighbour at that. She looked disapprovingly at me when I cracked up laughing. She was rigidly middle class and disliked anything that deviated from her idea of normal. Her meeting Mark was a horrifying prospect. I hoped he'd play nicely, but then with Mark you never knew quite what would happen next. Part of the appeal for me I guess.

"Shit Mum, life would be pretty boring if we were all the same. Imagine a world populated by clones of Ben!" Ben frowned at me and rolled his eyes when I stuck my tongue out at him. Our split had remained fairly amicable, as he hadn't been entirely happy either. I'd even called him once or twice from the US to catch up on what our mutual friends were up to. It was just Mum's eternal attempts to get me back with him that drove me insane.

The joy of being staff materialised in the form of ringside seats. Right on the corner by the steel steps into the ring. We settled in for the short wait until the show began.

"You look rather scruffy dear." Mum picked at the tear in my jeans and the sawn off sleeves of the T-shirt I was wearing. "I see you're still an Undertaker fan," she said, peering at the front of it.

"You have no idea," I muttered. Further conversation was prevented by the opening pyros as the show got underway.

One or two of the guys spotted me when they were in the ring. Adam smiled widely and shouted something at me during his after match trip round the ring, although I couldn't make out what it was. Batista went so far as to wink and shoot that cocky grin at us.

Mark was last up and despite having been to so many shows, I had never seen him live as one of the audience. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up along with everyone else's when the gong sounded and all of the lights went out. I found myself on my feet shouting and whistling as he came down the ramp and stopped in front of us, raising the lights with a gesture of his hands. He heard my voice as we were so close and cut his eyes towards me and I swear I saw the corners of his mouth twitch.

I saw his mouth move during the match as he said something to Carlito. Having watched the run through, I was puzzled when the match finished in the wrong place, but had to cover the grin on my face with my hands as Carlito was pinned in the corner near us. Taker folded Carlito's arms over his chest and leaned over in the famous pose facing us, tongue right out down his chin and eyes rolled up into his head. Definitely not going to play nice then.

"You know, I love to watch him, but I wish he didn't do that… thing," Mum said as we watched him walk up the ramp.

"Thing?"

"Yes. That tongue and eyes thing. Totally repulsive! Anyway, what are we doing now?"

I took a deep breath. "Well, first of all, I have to tell you something." She and Ben looked at me expectantly as I paused for a few seconds. "Er, I've never told you who I work for, have I?" She shook her head. "Well, this is it. I work for the WWE."

"I see." Her tone was a little cold. "Hardly a suitable job for you I would have thought."

Ben snorted dismissively. "Just up your street I suppose."

"I love the job, and I'm good at it. I'm getting to see a huge amount of places and meeting loads of interesting people. Suitable doesn't really come into it for me." I saw Ben cross his arms over his chest, disapproving right along with her, as I had known she would. "Look, come backstage and meet some of the guys. They're really quite normal on the whole." I started leading the way towards a door into the backstage area, flashing my pass at the security guard there. On the other side of the door my mother stopped, looking at me.

"This Mark, is he here?"

"Somewhere. Probably busy though. Just drop it, please. Now, who would you like to meet?"

I took her around as many people on her list as I could manage, even introducing her to Hunter, who she couldn't stand on screen, although she mellowed after chatting with him for a couple of minutes. Finally we finished her list and stood in a hallway.

"You want to meet the Undertaker?" I was surprised he hadn't been on her list, but then she was intrigued and disturbed by him in equal measures.

"I don't know…" she trailed off.

"I promise he doesn't bite!" I joked. "I know he's a little… intimidating in the ring, but he's not so bad outside."

"Well, all right then." Ben followed on behind us as I led the way to Mark's locker room and knocked on the door.

"Taker, you in there?" I heard a muffled reply. "You up for meeting a fan or two."

"Sure. Bring 'em on in." I opened the door and gestured for the other two to follow me inside. Mark stood in the middle of the room, bare-chested, not finished dressing after his shower.

"Good match. I liked the twist at the end," I said, a little sarcastically. Mark just raised an eyebrow at me. "Taker, this is my mother, Pam and Ben. He's, um, he's a friend." Mark glanced at me and mouthed 'Ben?' I inclined my head slightly, letting him know he was right.

"Pleased to meet you Pam, Ben." He shook hands. Mum looked rather overwhelmed staring up at him from her height of just over five feet as they exchanged a few words. I saw her eyes move over his arms and take in the tattoos there and across his stomach. "If you don't mind, I've got something I need to discuss with Jade here, then you can be on your way." I followed them to the door.

"I'll only be a couple of minutes. It's probably to do with getting up to Manchester. Wait here and I'll be right out." Shutting the door, I turned back to Mark.

"Like the shirt." He pulled at the hem of my T-shirt. "That's your husband?"

"Ex-husband, yes," I replied, a little tartly. "Changed a little from the walk through, didn't you?" He grinned at me, attempting an innocent look with those bright green eyes.

"How about some dinner? I'm starving." He pulled on his shirt. "Let's play meet the family."

I stared at him, mind going a million miles an hour. "I don't know if they've eaten."

He slapped me gently on the backside. "Well, go on and ask then."

Mum and Ben were standing opposite the door when I stuck my head out. "You guys eaten?" They both shook their heads. "Are you hungry?"

"Fairly," Mum replied. "Why?"

"How does dinner with a WWE superstar sound? Taker's offered to take us out." Mum mouthed and pointed behind me mutely. "I told you he doesn't bite!" I had to hold in a mad giggle when Mark gave a low growl behind me. I refused to look round as I knew he'd be pulling some kind of snarl behind me and if I saw that I'd never stop laughing. "So, whadya say?"

"So very American, darling. Yes, that would be very nice, wouldn't it Ben?" He made some kind of indistinct noise in his throat but gave in. He had always known that arguing with my mother was completely useless. "We'll be going home afterwards though."

"I booked you a room."

"Sorry darling, but Ben wants to go home tonight."

"It's OK, I'm sure I can find someone who'll use it." Like me, for instance. Tara really did snore.

It was decided that Ben would follow us in his car. They had a nearly two hour drive home to contend with later and anything that would save them time on that was welcomed. Mum went with him. She looked towards the back door of the car and then at me.

"I'll go with him." I pointed towards Mark. "You know I've never been good in the back seats of cars." Running over to Mark's rental, I waited for him to unlock it.

"Hmm, that's something we haven't tried," he muttered as we settled into the seats.

"Don't get any ideas now! English cars aren't big enough, at least not for you anyway." I twisted round in my seat, checking that Ben's car was still behind us.

"He's not what I would have expected you to have been married to."

"Hmm. I'm a pretty different person to what I was back then."

"What, you weren't opinionated or sarcastic?" He laughed at the notion.

"Not really, no. It wasn't so bad. He just never stood up to me. I didn't respect him. I can't believe she brought him here. And now we're all off for a cosy little dinner. It's a little weird."

"Guess it must be." He indicated and turned into a restaurant parking lot.

"You got my mother confused anyway. She can't figure out why you invited the three of us out with you. Not sure I can either." I looked closely at him as he switched the engine off. "Why did you?"

"Because I'm hungry and I wanted some company. Get out of the car before I have to drag you out, and you wouldn't want your momma seeing that now, would you?"

Rolling my eyes, I got out of the car, striding over to where Ben had parked his. "Come on. I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

There was no conversation while we sat at a table and ordered our food. Mum and Ben sat together on one side of the table, leaving me to sit where I would have chosen anyway. Mum eventually glanced up at Mark and cleared her throat.

"I'm sorry, but I have no idea what to call you. Jade said Taker, is that right?"

Mark glanced at me out of the corner of his eye and his mouth twitched slightly. "I haven't introduced myself properly, have I? Name's Mark." That left her speechless for the first time I could ever remember. Ben looked rather shocked as well, his eyes moving rapidly from me to the huge man I sat beside.

Mum eventually gathered her thoughts enough to speak. "That Mark?" she asked me breathlessly. She was left to think about it a little more as the food arrived, but I could see her eyes flicking over him, at the long hair tied back, the tattoo across his neck and the flashes of colour that showed from under his shirt cuffs as he reached for his water glass.

"Yes, that Mark," I said when the food was finally distributed and the waitress moved away again. "I, er, did tell you he had some tattoos."

Ben snorted. "Think you match, do you? With your four?" He pointed to my armband. I opened my mouth to reply but Mark got there first.

"She has six." That made Ben shut his mouth. Mark turned to me, a curious expression on his face. "Which ones are new then?"

"The rose was done just before I left the UK and the dragon a month or so after I got to Houston." He just nodded and started to eat.

Mum finally seemed to realise that her manners were severely lacking and tried to make conversation with me.

"Have you spoken to your brother recently?"

"Not for a little while. About six or seven weeks ago, I think. I'll go see him when we get that way."

She cleared her throat and looked at Mark. I could tell from the expression on her face that the next thing to come out of her mouth would be likely to be highly embarrassing.

"You are rather older than Jade, aren't you?" He said nothing, just fixed his eyes on her and waited for her to continue. She seemed to lose a bit of courage under that steady stare.

"Just leave it Mum. I'm not here for long. Don't spoil it." I tried to diffuse the situation. Mark put his hand on my arm.

"Let her talk." I subsided into silence. That seemed to unsettle Ben even more. "Go on," Mark said to her.

She tilted her chin up. "I want to know what your plans are." I cringed. She was coming over the protective mother.

Mark laughed and stretched his arm along the back of my seat. "I don't go much on making plans. Not any more. Neither does Jade it seems."

She turned to me. "And you're happy like that?"

"Yes I am. Damn it!" I plucked my cell phone out of my pocket and left the table to answer it. Mark looked at me questioningly when I came back.

"Problem?"

"Yeah. Matt Hardy had a little too much to drink. He's had a knock down drag out fight with Adam in the hotel bar and they've refused to let him stay there." I turned to the others. "It's been _interesting_, but I really do have to run."

"Oh, that's such a shame. Will you be coming home to visit?"

I snorted. "Maybe. I have a day off tomorrow, so I might. I'll call if I decide to come visiting."

Mark stood from his seat. "Why don't you go start the car while I pay up?" He handed me the car keys.

"Yes darling. You can walk us to our car," Mum said, picking up her bag. Once we got outside and out of earshot of anyone else she stepped in front of me, stopping me in my tracks. "Do you know what you're doing?"

"Of course I do," I retorted angrily.

"Just think about it for a moment. He's much older than you."

"I wouldn't call it _much_ older. It's less of an age gap than between my darling sister and her husband, and that's never been a problem."

"And then there's the tattoos. You know how much I hate tattoos."

"That include mine?" I shot back, clenching my fists by my sides. "I'm not your precious little girl any more Mum. I have my own life to lead."

She sighed and her shoulders drooped. "I know that darling, but it doesn't stop me worrying about you."

"You don't need to worry about me. I'm fine." I felt a bit guilty now. I'd built her up in my mind to be an interfering hag, when she was really just a concerned mother.

"Does he make you happy?" She looked over my shoulder, and I turned to see Mark coming out of the door.

"Yes. He makes me very happy."

"Well, as long as that is the case, I have no problem with it. Just one thing though, how do you cope with another woman's name on him like that?" She wrinkled her nose in distaste at the idea.

"I don't see it any more. It's just part of him."

"One more question before we go. Do you love him?"

I blinked at her. "I've never thought about it. It's only been a couple of months. Look, we have to go. I'll come down tomorrow and we can talk more then." I gave her a hug and watched her and Ben climb into his car. Mark slung an arm round my shoulders as we watched the car turn round.

"You OK?" he asked as I raised a hand to wave.

"Yeah, fine. I forgot how much she worries, that's all. Come on, we'd better go sort out Matt. At least the hotel room I booked for Mum can go on expenses. I'll just shove Matt in there."

"Damn. I had ideas for that place."

I chuckled at the face he pulled. "Patience! You're in a room on your own in Manchester. Took some careful working out, so I don't want to waste the opportunity."

We got to the hotel to find Matt sitting on a wall outside, flanked by three security guards. He had clearly had quite a bit to drink and his face was covered in cuts and bruises from the fight.

"Hey Matt," I said, crouching beside him. "Let's get you out of here." We bundled him into the back of the car. It only took a couple of minutes to get to the other hotel, just down the road. He mostly muttered to himself, but I occasionally heard him mutter Amy's name. We got him into the hotel room and onto the bed.

"I'd better stay here with him," Mark said, looking at the younger man who had by now passed out. "I'll see you at breakfast." He gave me a hug and passed me the car keys. "Wait for me in the lobby around nine." I nodded and left.

Tara was still awake when I let myself into our room.

"How was your evening?" she asked brightly.

"Interesting. Mum turned up with my ex in tow. Mark decided to invite us all out for dinner and then introduce himself to my mother as the guy I'm seeing." I collapsed onto my bed.

"How did that go down?"

"Not well at first. I think she'll be OK with it though. Not that she has any choice in the matter. I said I'd go down there tomorrow, so I guess we'll have a little mother daughter chat then. In the mean time, I'm shattered. I'm just going to have a shower and crash."


	9. Chapter 9

I met Mark in the lobby as arranged the next morning. He looked tired and thoughtful, almost like the first time I had spoken to him. That seemed like a long time ago now.

"You OK?" I asked, standing up to join him. "Didn't give you any trouble did he?"

Mark gave me a small smile. "No. He feels like shit this morning though. Rey's with him now, trying to force a prairie oyster down him."

"That thing with the egg?" I grimaced and shuddered. "That's pretty rank you know."

"Oh, you did take it then."

"Yeah. Haven't touched Jack since. Come on, I'm hungry."

We got our food and sat down. He was worrying me a bit, not tearing into his food like he normally did.

"What is it? Something's up."

He took a deep breath. "I got a phone call after you left last night."

"Oh?"

"From Sara." I wrapped my hands round my coffee mug and watched him. "She wants to meet when we get to Florida. Says she's got something she needs to talk to me about."

"Oh."

He glared at me across the table. "That all you got to say?"

I put the mug down. "There isn't a whole lot for me to say, is there? You walk in here looking like you hardly slept and tell me it's because your ex-wife rang you and wants to see you. I'm not quite sure what you expect me to say."

"Shit." He pushed his plate away, unfinished.

"You think she wants you back?" It hurt me to ask that, but it was the first thing that came to mind.

"I don't know. I've got the title match at Summerslam when we get to Florida. Maybe it's made her rethink the down sides of being married to a wrestler."

Here came the killer question for me. "Do you want her back?"

It seemed to have angered him as he glared at me again across the table. "I don't look back. You should now that by now."

"Yeah, I guess I do." I stretched my arms out over my head. "I suppose I should get myself sorted and head on home."

"I forgot you were doing that. I kind of thought we might spend the day together and relax a bit."

"I don't know how relaxing it'll be, but you're welcome to come if you want to. The family place is about the same size as yours. Although this time of year you have to tread careful if you don't want to end up spending all day pitching bales."

The idea of going somewhere new seemed to pull him out of his contemplative mood and it wasn't long before we were on the road heading towards the place where I had been born and grown up. Although it took longer, I avoided the motorways as much as possible on the drive, preferring to go through the countryside to pick out landmarks and my favourite places.

Before actually going home, I took Mark to my all time favourite place near home. There was a long range of rolling chalk hills just a few miles away from the family farm and I took the road up to the car park on the highest point. Parking up, I stopped the engine and got out to look over the miles of ground that could be seen from up there. Mark got out and joined me.

"You can see most of my life from up here. Right over there is one of our barns that you can just make out. Those buildings over there are where I went to college. That road just beside them is the one I lived in when I was married. And all around us here is the farm my Dad worked on when I was growing up. All my happiest hours were spent up here."

"It's a pretty place," Mark said, resting an arm across my shoulders. "You miss it." It wasn't quite a question or a statement.

I shook my head a little and looked up at him, tears prickling my eyes. "I haven't been up here in years. Not since my Dad died. Everything up here was tied to him and this is the first time I've wanted to be here." I cuffed the tears away and attempted a smile. "Let's get out of here before I make an idiot of myself."

That preyed on my mind a bit as we went on the short drive home. I had never wanted to go up there after my father died, so why had I wanted to take Mark there? I didn't understand it, but I liked the fact that I had even though I had cried in front of him.

Mark looked around with interest as I turned onto the long bumpy farm drive. On one side there was a pasture where ewes and lambs could be seen grazing in the warm summer sun while on the other side a field of ripe wheat shone dusky gold. A plume of dust could be seen rising from behind hedge and I realised that they must be cutting the barley. I groaned a little as we reached the house. The yard outside was full of cars.

"Trial by fire then. The whole family's here." I looked across at Mark. He flashed me a grin.

"Hell, let's go for the full effect then." He pulled off his shirt, leaving him in a sleeveless T-shirt. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a bandanna and tied it round his head and replaced his sunglasses on his nose. I couldn't help laughing.

"I've done a few things to shock my very proper family, but I think this is going to top it all. Come on." I got out the car and was greeted by two manic collie dogs, one of which flung himself up at me so I was forced to catch him. I gave him a quick cuddle and put him back on the ground, pausing to ruffle the other one's ears. "Hey Jem, Red. How you doing, huh?" They both growled as Mark got out. "Ignore them, they're both wusses."

Walking to the front door I opened it and poked my head inside. "Anybody here?"

"In the kitchen, Jade." Mum sounded harassed as she always did this time of year. I hadn't even got into the kitchen before she started talking at me a mile a minute. "This is great. You can spell your brother for a couple of hours. He needs to take Louise for an ultrasound, and we're a driver short as it is."

"Calm down," I said, stepping through the door into the kitchen. "For one, I'm not dressed for it and two, I didn't come alone." Looking around the large room I saw my sister and sister in law sitting at the kitchen table. Hey! Good to see you. Julia, Louise, meet Mark. Mark, this is my sister Julia, and sister in law Louise." The three of them nodded politely to each other but I could see both the women's eyes virtually on stalks, as they looked him over.

Mum turned round to look at me for the first time. "Oh, hello Mark," she said a little awkwardly. She looked him up and down for a moment and then cut her eyes to me. "I don't suppose you can drive a tractor?" Mark looked puzzled and I laughed.

"Is it that desperate?" I asked.

"The forecast is for rain. We've only got forty acres left to do, but we won't get it finished at this rate."

I glanced at Mark. "Can you drive a tractor and trailer?"

"I've never tried." He leant against the wall and tried to ignore the two other women who were staring at him and whispering amongst themselves.

I looked at Mum's worried face and then back at Mark. "Would you mind? It's only for a couple of hours. You can come with me if you like. I think you'll fit in the cab." He shrugged. "OK Mum, I'll do it but someone will have to lend me a T-shirt. And some shorts. It's too damn hot to drive in jeans. And I need some boots as well."

"Your boots are still here. You'll have to borrow clothes from your brother." Louise got up and went to find me some clothes, returning with a pair of cut off jeans and a huge T-shirt. Mum frowned when I stripped off my clothes in the kitchen.

"It's nothing he hasn't seen before Mum," I said, tying my hair back. She tutted at me and returned to making up huge flasks of tea and coffee for the workers. All five of us climbed into the farm truck and headed for the field where they were working. I sat in the middle of the back seat, creating a buffer between Mark and Julia who kept glancing at him nervously.

We got to the field and saw the enormous combine moving steadily through the ripe crop, a tractor and trailer running alongside to catch the grain pouring from the spout. Seeing the truck pull in the machines stopped and everyone climbed out for a quick drink. Getting out Mark eyed the huge tractor dubiously.

"Are you safe in one of those things?" I shook my head and prodded him in the back.

"I've been driving these things since I was big enough to reach the pedals."

"Oh shit!" My brother Jamie spotted me. "Sam, did you reinforce the grain store wall?"

I gave him a hug and swatted him up the back of his head. "I was fifteen when I did that. Are you ever going to let me forget?"

"Probably not. Who's the stranger?" He jerked his head towards Mark. "He looks kind of familiar."

"That's Mark. We're kind of together." He made a noise in his throat and accepted the mug that his wife passed him. "He's a wrestler."

"That might explain it. So you here to work then?"

"Yep. Sounds like you got your wife up the duff again. Congratulations."

"Thanks." He tipped the last of the tea out of his mug. "I guess I'd better go take a shower and get ready then. Look after my baby now." He inclined his head towards the tractor.

"Just so long as Louise knows where she comes in the hierarchy! Hi Sam." I gave Julia's husband a peck on the cheek.

"Ready to do some work for a change?" he grinned.

"Yeah. Running around after a bunch of juvenile delinquents is a complete picnic compared to sitting in an air-conditioned tractor cab all day. You coming Mark?"

He fitted in the passenger seat… just. Of course these machines weren't big by US standards but pretty sizeable by UK ones. I altered the seat, hiked the AC up to full blast and changed the radio station. Then I was ready to work.

Carting grain isn't exactly an exciting job. You drive up and down a field waiting for the trailer to be full. When it is you zoom off to the grain store, back the trailer in and tip the grain out. Actually, the first trip to the grain store was mildly amusing as Mark was convinced that I'd never get the trailer in through the door. It was only about four feet wider than the trailer, but I'd been doing this for the best part of fourteen years, ever since I was old enough to have a licence to drive a tractor on the road.

Still, it was quite boring. I was glad to see Jamie hopping out of the truck a couple of hours later. Parking the tractor at the end of the field, I hopped out, Mark climbing stiffly out behind me.

"Are you coming to the house for lunch?" Mum called from the driver's seat.

I glanced at Mark and then back to her. "How much food do you have in the house?"

"Plenty. Why?"

I grinned. "You haven't seen an appetite like this one's got."

Lunch was a fairly stilted affair. Mum did her best to be polite and chatted with Mark, mainly asking him questions about wrestling as it was a subject she had some knowledge of. We both told her stories about some of her favourites and dispelled some of the notions she had about the ones she didn't like so much. Julia and Louise were much less forthcoming, whispering between themselves as they had done before, and throwing strange little grins at me when they thought I wasn't looking.

I suppose that with what I had done in the last few months I had become the rebel of the family. Yes, it was a pretty tame family. No skeletons in closets there. I don't have some terrible dark secret past, some horrific thing I had run away to escape. The life I had known here just hadn't been what I had wanted, pure and simple. As an example, one of the biggest arguments ever to rise in our family since I had been born had been over my first tattoo. My father had gone absolutely bat shit about it and he and I had ended up screaming at each other, our faces about a foot apart. Even that had been forgotten within a few days. Dad had just shaken his head and joked about not knowing where I came from. He had laughed himself stupid when I offered the options of either the postman or the milkman. Mum hadn't found that _quite_ so amusing.

After we had eaten I didn't feel like heading straight back so dragged Mark out for a walk round the farm. Taking him to one of my favourite places, I swung up astride the trunk of a fallen tree and sat looking out over the pasture in front of me. Mark was still in a strange mood, quiet and reflective. I was surprised when he jumped up on the log behind me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, pulling me back to lean against his chest and resting his chin on my head. We sat in silence for a while before I started to get a little uneasy.

"Hey." I tapped him on the thigh. "I thought I was the thinking one in this duo." He gave a small dry laugh and slid his face down to nestle into the junction of my neck and shoulder. His beard prickled at the sensitive skin and made me come out in goose bumps. "Penny for 'em? If you're lucky I might be able to find a quarter."

"You probably don't want to know."

I dropped my head back onto his shoulder. "Maybe not, but I'm going to bug you until you tell me." He sighed and let go of me, leaning back on the trunk behind him. I wriggled away and turned round to face him, hooking my legs over his.

"I can't help wondering what she wants. She wouldn't tell me on the phone, insists she wants to talk to me face to face."

"Stupid thing to say I know, but there's no point worrying about it until then. You'll just drive yourself crazy." He looked away to the side, uncomfortable with the subject. "Look, I know you have an aversion to grown up conversations so I'll just say this – if Sara won't talk to you on the phone, there is nothing you can do about it. Especially when we are thousands of miles away, on a different continent. Right now there's just you and me here, so why don't we try to enjoy the time we have."

I knew it was a slightly strange thing to say at the end, but I couldn't think of any other way to word it. The idea of his ex-wife having something which was obviously so important to talk about made me very uneasy. My insecurities had come raging out during the conversation we had in his locker room the afternoon before and had put themselves plainly on show. I had felt vulnerable for the whole time I had been seeing him, and I hated to feel that way.

Later that afternoon we took our leave from my family and, after picking up our belongings from the hotel, began the drive up to Manchester. It was just under two hundred miles and took around three and a half hours. It was a measure of how tired Mark was that he fell asleep pretty much as soon as we got on the M1, leaving me alone with the road and my thoughts.

Mum had asked me the evening before if I loved Mark. I had told her truthfully that I didn't know. Since his news that morning I had been left with a strange empty feeling in the pit of my stomach, a vague fluttering of something on the edge of my perception. I glanced out of the corner of my eye at him sprawled in a kind of loose-limbed elegance, the car seat pushed back as far as it would go to make room for his long legs.

To be brutally honest, he summed up pretty much everything I had avoided in men before. He was possessive, demanding and, to a degree, controlling. All of the things I had thought wouldn't suit my temperament. But with him I accepted it was just how he was. None of it had ever made me uncomfortable. In fact the one time I had ever had a crisis of confidence with him had been in that hotel room in Seattle and how he had behaved towards me then had made me view him completely differently.

He had also put himself into an awkward situation that he hadn't needed to in meeting my mother. Mind you, he had dealt with it in his normal manner. Actually he had been much more polite than normal in hindsight, especially for someone who made it so very plain that he really didn't give a damn what anyone else thought.

I could feel my eyelids starting to droop and decided it was time for a break at the next motorway services. Leaving Mark still sleeping, I ran into the building and bought two of the largest coffees I could find. And a very large bag of sweets. Living in the USA had been extremely good for my waistline, as I really didn't like their chocolate. And I could never drive long distances without having some variety of sweets in the car.

Getting back to the car I left the door open and sat in the seat sideways, hanging my legs out. And went back to the thoroughly confusing task of analysing how I felt.

Lighting a cigarette I leaned my body forward to stop any smoke going back into the car. I was getting dangerously close to being back as a full-time smoker but it helped to soothe my frazzled nerves. Using that as an excuse I lit another from the end of that one.

I decided it was time to be completely honest with myself. Thinking about how he affected me and the tight clenching feeling I got in my gut every time I saw him I came to a conclusion. I might not be in love with him, but I was heading that way fast.

"You know that is just damn nasty." He spoke suddenly, making me jump.

"What?"

"That." He pointed to the cigarette in my hand. "Hand them over."

"No!"

He glared at me. "Hand them over." I flicked the butt out of the car and dug the packet out of my pocket, putting them in his hand and watching as he crushed them beyond saving. Opening his door and stepping out of the car he threw the remains into a litterbin.

"You know you could make it very easy to hate you." I turned my back to him and sipped my coffee. I heard him chuckle and felt a finger run down the back of my neck under my hair.

"But you know you don't. Did you get me coffee?"

I pointed to the cup holder in the dash. "I value my neck too much to not get you any."

He took the lid off and took a big gulp. "How long have I been out for?"

I looked at the clock in the front of the car. "Couple of hours. We're just over half way." I climbed back out of the car and stretched, wincing at the popping and cracking noises from my spine. "Another hour, hour and a half and we should be there." Getting back in I reached for my seat belt. "You ready?"

"Sure. What the hell is all that?" I looked to where he pointed and grinned guiltily.

"I can't drive without stuff that is really bad for me. And I really don't like American candy much. So I'm making the most of it while I'm here." He shook his head at me, although I noticed that it didn't stop him helping himself to what was there.

At least with him awake it stopped me going over and over the thoughts that had been running through my mind up until now. As he was now awake, I plugged a Metallica CD into the stereo before we moved off which got us most of the way to Manchester.

Most of the company had already checked into the hotel when we got there and there was a message for me from Karen about an autograph session the next morning with all the titleholders.

"I should go and dump my stuff in my room."

"Stay with me," Mark said. "Bring it to my room." This was new. Although I often stayed with him when he was in a room on his own I was usually based in my own room, normally with Tara.

"Uh, OK. I should just check in with Tara and let her know, though."

Tara's room was a couple of floors below Mark's, so I dropped my bags in his room and went down to find her. I knocked on the door and she opened it a few seconds later.

"Lost your key already? And where's your stuff?"

"In Mark's room. He asked me to stay with him while we're here."

"Oooh, a development!" She grinned at me. "What's brought this on?"

"If it's what I think it is, it's not my place to say anything. Do you mind?"

"Of course not. Are you going out later? I hear this city has quite a club scene."

"I don't know. I'd like to. I've been to Manchester a couple of times and really enjoyed it. In the mean time, I could do with a shower. It's a long drive up here from home." I stood and stretched.

"I forgot you went to visit your family. How did it go?" She grabbed a couple of bottles of Coke out of the fridge and passed me one.

"Um, OK I guess. Mum was a little friendlier this time. My sisters were a bit off though. You going out tonight then?" I sank back onto the bed and took a swig of my Coke.

"I think loads of people are. Certainly most of the talents were talking about it. Come on, you know you want to!" She tilted her head to the side, grinning at me.

"I'll talk to Mark," I compromised.

"You aren't joined at the hip, you know. You could come out without him," she huffed.

"It's a little complicated at the moment. He's in a kind of strange mood."

"You are so under the thumb!" She was trying to provoke me now.

"Probably. I'll let you know." I stood once more and deposited the Coke bottle in the bin.

The rooms booked for the 'talents' (I still hated that word) in this hotel were a little more luxurious than had been booked for staff. Mark had given me the key when I left to talk to Tara. When I let myself in he was sitting on the end of the bed, starting blankly at the TV screen. I stepped round in between him and the screen. He didn't react at first.

"Earth to Mark? Er, ground control to Major Tom!" His eyes jerked towards me and he frowned. "Sorry," I smiled. "Favourite song when I was a kid. You feel like going out later? Apparently most of the roster are talking about going to a club."

"Maybe." He reached out and gathered me in towards him, pulling me closer until his head rested against my shoulder and slipping his hands under the back of my T-shirt to rub over bare skin. As always his touch made my skin break out in goose bumps and my head dropped forward as he gently kneaded the muscles on either side of my spine.

Mark by habit was never particularly gentle. I don't mean that he was rough, but he had a tendency to know what he wanted and go right after it until he got it. He never hurt me, but he was always definitely in control. Especially during sex. Right now though he was showing a tentativeness that I had never seen in him before, almost as if he was asking with every movement.

Normally by that time if he wanted sex my top half would be naked and he would be licking and biting anything within reach. This time was different. His hands moved slowly, stroking the skin of my back and sliding round to my front, so gentle it almost tickled. His head turned slightly so that his face was pressing into my neck and I could feel his jaw move as he whispered words I couldn't hear.

I stepped back and looked at him. He looked kind of lost at the loss of contact, a slight frown creasing his forehead. I just gave him a faint smile and stripped off before approaching him again and pulling his shirt off. Pushing him back onto the bed, I undid his belt and jeans, working them down his legs and removing his boots to leave him naked. Straddling his thighs I ran my hands softly over every part of him I could reach. A spark of his normal fire showed for an instant as he flipped me onto my back and positioned himself over me, weight resting on his elbows.

I hate to be a spoilsport, but the details of what happened next are mine to remember alone. Well, Mark's too I guess. I had a pretty good idea why he was that way on that night of course. It wouldn't take a genius to work out what was worrying him. I'd never known him to be so very gentle and it affected me fairly deeply for a while. I didn't go all sappy and weepy, but I did revisit my thoughts of the drive up to Manchester. Never mind coming close to falling in love, I was in chest deep and sinking fast.

We decided to go out with the others later on. Mark needed the distraction, and I just needed a damn good night out and Manchester was a pretty good bet. The club of choice was just a couple of minutes walk from the hotel and everyone gathered in the hotel lobby before we moved along. Mark had recovered enough of his normal personality to have 'helped' me pick what I was wearing.

As we exited the elevator into the lobby I took a deep breath. "Someone seems to be on the pull tonight." Judging by the number of grins, it seemed to be half the company, but I tracked down the extremely nice smelling cologne to Dave Batista. Suffice it to say that he smelt as good as he usually looked. And that's pretty damn good.

The club was dark, packed and very noisy. Just right for the mood I was in. Mark was quite happy sat in a corner with a beer talking to Glen and a couple of others and after five minutes of me fidgeting by his side told me to 'get lost and have some fun.' I made a beeline for Tara who was on the edge of a group from the company.

"Hey! Thought we were supposed to be having a good time!" She laughed, grabbed me and dragged me to the dance floor. In pretty much every direction you looked in there was someone trying to catch the attention of one of the wrestlers, both male and female. Of course, that included Mark as well. I broke off dancing and went to the bar.

"You OK?" Amy took a step back to say hi. She followed my eye line to where Mark was sitting. "Yeah, it sucks, doesn't it? Goes with the territory though. So, how are you guys getting on?"

"OK I guess."

"You don't sound very convinced." She looked at me over the rim of her glass.

"Excuse me miss?" The barman leaned over towards me. "This is for you." He handed me a glass. I sniffed at the contents. Jack Daniels.

"I think you're mistaken. I didn't order this."

"No, the gentleman at the end of the bar did." I glanced along to the far end of the bar. Batista grinned at me and lifted his own glass in my direction. Yep, things were definitely OK there. Although, if things were different… you know the rest. I shook my head and smiled at him, throwing the shot back quickly and turning back to Amy.

"He's just… complicated. Unpredictable. I love it, but it doesn't always make life easy. Although I suppose if I wanted an easy life I'd never have got involved with him in the first place."

"Hey, if women wanted easy lives, they'd find something other than men to spend them with," she grinned.

"You don't seem to be doing so badly." I pointed towards Adam with my empty glass. Amy looked at him fondly.

"Just one of the lucky ones I guess."

The UK has its share of ring rats just like anywhere else. The problem with choosing a club so close to where everyone was staying was trying to get rid of them (at least the ones that hadn't actually succeeded in pulling) before actually getting back to the hotel. It's a pretty fine line to walk rejecting one, especially the persistent ones. Under no circumstances can a scene be caused, anything that might reflect badly on the company. Also there was also the danger these days of a disgruntled rejected rat making accusations. Tabloid newspapers love scandal, especially involving celebrities. I was as guilty as anybody of flicking through those magazines that told of who had done what and to whom. To an extent it also fell in my brief – sorting out problems for the stars when they were on the road. Especially here in my home country. It had been a pleasant evening until a hand descended on my shoulder.

"Jade, I think we have a problem." Victoria spun me round and pointed towards a broad back at the far end of the bar. I couldn't make out who it was, just a drunken woman hanging around his neck. "He's tried to get rid of her, but she won't take no for an answer. She's got friends too." A group of about four girls were cheering her on.

"Shit! Who is it?"

"Batista." Yeah, it would be.

"Can't one of you lot pretend to be his wife?" I asked, thinking desperately.

"None of the Divas can. It could jeopardise storylines." I supposed it was a sort of good reason. "Besides, it could…"

"Possibly reflect on the company in some way. Yeah I get it. What the hell can I do though?"

"Why don't you do it?"

I looked at her, stunned. "Me? Pretend to be Batista's wife? Are you crazy?"

"What? There's no one else! Besides, it's your job to avoid problems, isn't it?"

I tried frantically to think of another way. "What about the other back stage guys?"

Victoria shook her head. "There's only you and that make up girl here, what's her name? Tara?"

"Why not get her to do it?" Victoria just looked at me, one brow raised. "Fair enough. Not the best idea I suppose." I was all out of ideas. "OK, but I need to tell Taker what I'm doing."

Victoria put out a hand to stop me. "I'll tell him. Wouldn't look too convincing if the rat's friends saw you snuggling up to him."

"I'm not moving until you do." I watched her go over to Mark and mutter in his ear. He glanced up at me, a slight frown on his face, and then nodded slightly.

Taking a deep breath I shot a glance down at my empty left hand. Quickly I stripped off the signet ring I wore on the ring finger of my right hand and put it on my wedding ring finger. I'd just have to claim a distinctive taste in wedding rings. I'd had a variety of jobs over the years. Some of them involved doing some fairly strange things and some of them had tended towards the disgusting. This, however, was probably the strangest thing I had ever had to do for the sake of a job.


	10. Chapter 10

Taking a couple more deep breaths I looked up and tried to catch the eye of someone near Dave. For this to work, he had to have a clue of what I was doing. Finally I managed to get Hunter's attention. I raised my left hand and pointed to the ring, inclining my head slightly towards Dave. Hunter looked puzzled for a moment and then he smiled and gave a slight nod before leaning forward to speak to Dave very quietly.

"Going to the rescue?" Amy asked, an amused twist to her mouth.

"Got to love this job. I can't act for shit, but I hope I can pull this off."

"I doubt you'll have too much of a problem." I turned to see Tara glaring at me. "Not after what you told me before." I could see Amy's eyes moving between us as she scented a bit of gossip. "You'll get a kick out of it, won't you?"

"Tara, drop it. Now is not the time for your insecure bullshit. I'm not particularly happy about doing this but I am going to. I'll talk to you later." I stepped away and rolled my neck a couple of times, psyching myself into what I was about to do. I walked around the group and approached Dave from directly in front. He caught my eye over the girl's head and gave me a grin.

"Hey, I've been neglecting you," I said, sliding in to his other side and wrapping my arm round his. "Hi there. You must be a fan." I looked at the girl hanging off his far shoulder. She stood up a little and blinked at me.

"Who are you?"

I held out a hand. "I'm Dave's wife." She took a step back, ignoring my hand, which I dropped back down. She wasn't convinced. Dave put his arm round me and gently moved me so I was standing between his legs as he sat on the stool, my back to him.

"You want a drink, baby?" he asked in my ear. I nodded, forcing myself to relax back against him. I could almost feel a hot spot on my shoulder. I just knew that Mark was watching me from the corner.

"You are married to him?" The girl pointed from me to Dave. "Prove it."

I cocked my head on one side. "And just how am I supposed to do that? I don't carry my marriage certificate round with me." A glass appeared at my side and I took it with a smile back over my shoulder. It was hard work not to react too much when he wrapped his arms round my waist. It wouldn't have been a bad position to be in but… I drank the Jack he had passed me and faced the girl once more. "So, sweetheart, what can I do to make you believe me?" I was convinced she couldn't come up with something too bad in a public place. "Keep it polite though, huh?"

I heard him chuckle behind me. Strangely that relaxed me more. I leant back against his chest, one palm on the top of each of his thighs.

"I think she's speechless, babe." I glanced at the girl again. She really did seem to be struggling for something to say. Just at that moment Dave rattled his tongue stud along his teeth. My breath caught for a second and all the hair on the back of my neck stood up. My thoughts on that particular piece of body modification had already been made crystal clear. To put it bluntly I was as turned on as hell, as if a switch had been flicked somewhere. I don't know what inner demon made me do what I did next because it was quite possibly the most stupid thing I had ever done.

I turned to face Dave. "Well, why don't we give her a little show, stud?"

Never mock the acting abilities of wrestlers. He managed to cover his shock completely, giving me the tiniest of questioning looks. There wasn't really any backing down from it now though as I hadn't said it quietly. My attention focussed solely on him. In truth, I really wasn't thinking at all. Especially when he leant forward and kissed me.

Rational thought descended fairly quickly after he broke the kiss though. I panicked for a moment, but luckily was still pulled in tight against Dave's chest.

"Fuck! I need to get out of here," I muttered.

"OK," I heard him whisper back as he let go of me. "Well guys, after that I think it's time I took my wife back to the hotel." He dropped them a saucy wink. "Come on baby, there's plenty more where that came from." I moved with him as he wrapped an arm round my shoulders and began to draw me to the exit. As we got near the corner where I had left Mark, I flicked my eyes to his seat.

It was empty.

The short walk back to the hotel was made in silence. Dave still had his arm round my shoulders as we stepped into the hotel lobby. I stepped away from him a little once we were inside.

"You kind of took me by surprise there," he grinned.

"Hmm. Me too. Just for the record, don't do that near me again."

"What?" He adopted an innocent expression and rattled his tongue stud along his teeth again. "That?"

I shivered. "Yes, that."

He laughed. "You do find it entertaining, don't you? Come on, I'll be a gentleman and walk you to your room. Where are you?"

"Sixth floor. I'm staying with Mark."

"Same here. Well, not with Taker, obviously." He pushed the elevator button, the door opening almost immediately for us to step inside. "Listen, thanks for doing that. They'd had way too much and it was getting tricky."

I shrugged. "It's kind of part of my job. You know, avoiding problems wherever possible. Just don't make a habit of it."

"Yeah, well I owe you one."

"Forget about it." The elevator doors opened on the sixth floor and we stepped out. "This is me," I said, stopping outside the room door.

"I'm two doors down. Thanks again. I mean it when I say I owe you one." He gave me a brief hug and strode down the hallway, disappearing into his own room. I turned back to the door in front of me and knocked.

"Mark, you in there? Let me in." There was nothing for a few seconds, and then heavy footsteps coming to the door. It opened and he stood in the gap. I made to step forward but he didn't move.

"Hey big guy, I can't get through the door with you in it!"

"Been having fun?" His tone of voice made my eyes snap up to his face. "Didn't expect to see you here tonight. Thought you'd be making the most of your opportunity."

His words stung, especially when compared with what had happened earlier that evening.

Soft movements and whispered endearments. Fingers laced tightly as two bodies moved together. Giving and taking of pleasure, calling his name softly at the peak. The closeness of the aftermath, his face buried in my hair, and the time spent together afterward, wrapped in each other's arms. Sharing a shower and washing each other, trading gentle caresses that led to more under the hot water. Knowing that I had fallen in love. Thinking that maybe he felt the same.

"Mark, I was just helping Dave out of a difficult situation. You know what some of these rats can be like." I moved to put a hand on his arm but he jerked it back out of my way. "Mark, please…"

"Just don't, Jade. I don't want to do this right now. Maybe I'll see you tomorrow." He stepped back and shut the door. I stared at it, stunned. The worst part was that he hadn't been angry. He had seemed somehow disappointed, like I had let him down. Cuffing away the tears that started to spill over my eyelids I backed away from the door and headed for the elevator again, thinking I would have to go and crash with Tara.

I got down to the fourth floor and found her room. When I knocked on the door there was a scuffling noise before Tara called out.

"Who is it?"

"Jade."

"I'm busy."

"Tara, I…" I heard a male voice in the room. That kind of busy. "Never mind. Sorry for disturbing your fun."

I went down to the hotel bar and persuaded the barman to sell me a bottle of Jack. I sat and stared around the bar for a little while, trying to work out where I was going to spend the night. Eventually I glanced at the bottle sat in front of me and a scrap of conversation flitted across my mind. Grabbing the bottle quickly and moving before I changed my mind, I hurried to the elevator and pushed the button for the sixth floor again.

I paused outside Mark's door, tears filling my eyes once more before shaking them away angrily and walking on down the hall. I stopped two doors down and knocked quickly. The door opened after a slight delay. Dave stood there, a puzzled look on his face when he saw me. He had clearly been about to go to bed. He still had his pants on but was shirtless.

"Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't think how late it was." I backed up, about to turn away.

"You all right?" He took a step out of his door, a concerned expression on his features when he saw my reddened eyes.

"I've had better days." I held the bottle up. "I wondered if you fancied a drink? You didn't get any of the bottle you bought in Houston." He regarded me for a few more seconds and then stepped back, indicating that I should go in with his arm. I stumbled inside and perched on the end of the bed.

"Another misunderstanding?" he asked as he shut the door.

"Let's put it this way," I said as I placed one hand flat on the bed beside, "This is exactly where he thought I'd be. Just not with my clothes on."

"Ouch." He sat beside me and reached for the bottle. "Doesn't say much for what he thinks of you, or me for that matter."

I gave a hollow laugh. "Who the hell ever knows what he's thinking? I certainly never do." I watched as he stripped the plastic from the neck of the bottle, removed the lid and took a hit from it.

"Talk," he said, passing me the Jack. "Come on, nothing ever got out the last time, did it?" he asked when I gave him an uncertain look.

"True." I sighed and took a mouthful of the fiery spirit. "He's been in a strange mood all day. Really quiet and thinking all the time."

"He's not much of a talker anyway. Any idea why?"

"Oh yes, I know what the problem is. Fuck all I can do about it though." I took another swig from the bottle and passed it back. Dave waited patiently for me to go on. "Sara."

He frowned. "What about her?"

"She called him last night. Apparently she needs to see him when we get to Florida. Needs to talk to him about something. And it has to be face to face."

"And you think…"

"I think she wants him back. He said himself that his title match at Summerslam may have made her, what was it? Oh yeah, 'reconsider the downsides of being married to a wrestler.'" I grabbed the bottle back and took a long drink. Dave took it back as soon as I put it down and put the lid back on, placing it firmly out of my reach.

"I'm guessing he didn't like your little stunt earlier." He leant back on one elbow. If I hadn't been so caught up in my misery it would have been an extremely enjoyable sight as he still hadn't put a shirt on.

"When I tried to get into the room he wouldn't let me in. Said he thought I'd be making the most of my opportunity. He might see me tomorrow. Which leaves me in the shit tonight. I went down to Tara's room where I was supposed to be, but she has company. I guess I'm going to have to try and talk to him again."

"Probably won't do much good tonight." His jaw cracked as he gave a huge yawn.

"Yeah, but I'm keeping you up. And all my stuff's in there."

He sat back up. "What if she does want him back?"

I shrugged. "He said he never looks back. But then why is it bothering him so much?"

"I meant what would you do?" He watched me closely.

"Nothing I can do about it. I know it'll happen one day. If not Sara then someone else will come along. He's a catch, any of you guys are. And I'm playing out of my league if I'm honest. I'll just have to pick myself up, brush myself down and get on with my life. I promised the company that being involved with him wouldn't affect my job." I sighed and looked up at him. "It's only been a couple of months after all. If we get through this, it's only another three weeks until we get to Florida."

Dave rose from the bed and paced round the room. "You know, when you blew up at me in that hotel lobby, I took you for a fighter. You showed a temper to match up to any of the Divas that work for this company. I haven't been yelled at like that in years."

I blinked at him stupidly. "What…"

"So why the hell are you sitting here moping? Get back to Taker and show him some of that. I know you weren't happy about what you did tonight, and it took guts for you to do it. So get and show him some of those guts."

I got up, frowning angrily. "Hey, dumbass, don't shout at me!" I turned and stormed out of his room, so annoyed that I totally missed the chuckle that escaped him.

"Shit, that was easy!"

I walked up and down in the hallway for a little while, letting the spike of anger that Dave had provoked in me calm down just a bit before knocking on Mark's door again. It took a couple of minutes before he opened the door this time. He was still dressed so clearly hadn't been in bed. He made as if to stand in the doorway again, but I ducked under his arm and made it inside.

"I told you I didn't want to do this." He ran his hands through his hair but shut the door.

I sat on the end of the bed and crossed my arms over my chest. "Maybe it's time for me to tell you some things for a change." His head jerked up, eyes bright green and angry.

"Just what the hell do you think you are going to tell me? I'm…"

I shot to my feet. "Yeah, I know. You're the Deadman, the Phenom, the bad ass, the big dog in the yard. Well, guess what honey? We ain't in Texas any more. This is the UK, and that makes this _my_ yard. So just for once, I'm going to talk and you're going to listen. Got it? Good." I risked a quick glance at him. He looked slightly stunned.

"Wait just a minute." He took a couple of steps towards me.

I interrupted him. "You know, we really need to get this sorted out, so I have just a couple of things to say. I am not, repeat not, about to go and jump into bed with Batista, or anyone else for that matter. I'm not a slut or a star fucker and I've already got a man that I've lusted after since I was about sixteen. Secondly, about what happened tonight. I didn't do that to 'get a kick out of it' at all, it was just a case of trying to avoid an awkward situation. And I wouldn't even consider it until I saw Victoria tell you what I was going to do. This is my job, Mark. I was just doing my job."

"Why did it involve trying to eat his face off?" He sounded as if he was on the edge of angry, ready to flare up at any moment. I sank back on the bed and put my head in my hands.

"Maybe the most idiotic thing I have ever done in my life. But it worked. If you hadn't disappeared you would have seen that we left straight after that and came back to the hotel. Then I came straight here to find you. Damn it Mark, why can't you trust me? I've said some stupid things, but when have I ever done anything wrong?" I glanced up at him again. He was looking to one side and his shoulders were going back down from where they had been bunched up in his fury. He sighed and his shoulders slumped further down.

"It's all just so messed up. What the hell is going on?" The anger had gone from his voice as well. He sounded again as he had that morning, lost and a little confused. I stood and moved over to him, putting a hand on his arm. He didn't move away this time, but I could feel him shaking slightly.

"Mark, you could give me the choice between you and any of the roster, all of the roster even, and I would choose you. Every time, as long as you are available. You've got me so I would pretty much walk through fire for you and God knows, I feel like that's what I'm doing at the moment. But right now the only thing that would get me away from you is if you told me to go." I slid my hand up his arm to his shoulder. "Until that happens, you're stuck with me."

He turned his head slightly towards me. "You been drinking?"

"A little. He wouldn't let me have much." I snapped my mouth shut, realising that it had gone on merrily without bothering to consult my brain.

"Which 'he' is that?" He didn't move, just tilted his head to the side and watched me through narrowed eyes.

"I went down to Tara's room, but she was busy. So I bought a bottle of Jack and came back up here. And went to talk to Dave." I felt the tension in his muscles again. "I didn't have any idea where else to go, Mark. And he's kind of becoming a friend. We talked for a while, and then he kind of fired me up and sent me back here to talk to you."

"I still don't like it," he grumbled but I felt him relax again.

"You've made that pretty clear. Look, I like Dave. He's fun to be around most of the time, and he is easy on the eye, but that's all. You're totally different. How I think and feel about you is totally different. So can we please just go to bed and put tonight behind us?" He took a deep breath and nodded. I rolled my shoulders, feeling the tightness in my own muscles subsiding, and undressed before sliding into the bed. Mark started to remove his own clothes before turning and eying me speculatively.

"Did you really just tell me we're in your yard?"

I laughed at the stupidity of the comment I had made in my ranting. "Yeah. Didn't you realise I can be a pretty big bitch?" He laughed as well, dispelling the remains of the black cloud that had hovered over the room, as he got into the bed beside me. I turned onto my side and snuggled into him, sighing contentedly. Crisis averted, at least this time.

Unsurprisingly I didn't sleep all that well that night and woke up just before six am. I was never very good at keeping still if I was awake and, try as I might not to disturb him, I managed to wake Mark up. He looked at the clock and thumped his head back into the pillow.

"As far as I'm concerned, this is the middle of the night," he grumbled, turning towards me.

"I can't get back to sleep. I still don't have to be up for a couple of hours." I wriggled until I was pressed right up against him, one of his arms round behind my back.

"Keep wriggling like that and something's going to be up, darlin'." I just smirked at him and rolled my body against his. Like a flash he had hold of me and rolled himself onto his back, me lying on top of him.

"Ah, I didn't realise you meant me," I said, pushing myself up to a sitting position. He just grinned up at me and moved me backwards lightly to straddle his groin. Rolling his hips underneath me, he showed very clearly just what exactly was up. "I suppose that might kill a couple of minutes…"

He growled deep in his throat and pulled me roughly up his body, still sitting upright. I didn't have a clue what he was about to do until he lifted me slightly and shifted himself down the bed.

His tongue was pretty famous; it made an appearance in a lot of his matches. But right at that moment I was convinced it was famous for the wrong reason. Strangely this was something he had never done before. It was never necessary to get me ready for him. Pretty much as soon as he touched me when we were alone I would be good to go. It was just the effect he had on me. Now I realised what I had been missing out on as he held me steady over top of him, applying his tongue to my most sensitive spots before pushing in as far as he could reach. I had to lean both hands on the wall to keep my balance. My legs were trembling convulsively, threatening to give up supporting me and I bit down hard on my lower lip as he flicked his tongue across my clit rapidly.

For just a split second I wondered what it would be like if he had a tongue piercing. A second was all it needed and I tipped over the edge with a groan that seemed to shake my entire body. Mark held me steady until it was over, and then lifted me slightly to slide out from underneath me.

"Care to change that last statement?" he asked, sitting next to me. I looked at him, chest still heaving and face flushed.

"Make me."

One eyebrow shot up towards his hairline as I challenged him. He reached out a hand and tugged on my leg, pulling me down onto my back. He nudged my knees apart and settled between my thighs.

"Tell me what you want."

I slid my hands up over his shoulders and linked my fingers behind his neck. "Like yesterday."

He looked at me steadily for a few seconds, eyes narrowing slightly. Sliding a hand down between our bodies he positioned himself and entered so very slowly, pushing steadily forward as far as he could go.

"So tight," he hissed, leaning down to kiss me. It was a gentle kiss, exploring what I offered up to him freely. He began to move, long slow strokes and I hooked my heels behind his thighs to allow myself to move freely with him.

"God that feels so good," I whispered, dropping my head onto the pillow. Mark rumbled low in his chest and picked up the pace just a little, pulling my legs up to wrap round his waist. I whimpered as the sensations changed, became more intense. He dropped a hand to my breast, rubbing the whole thing in his palm before rolling the nipple in his fingers, before drawing it up into a tight little peak and swapping to the other side. He nipped gently at the skin down the side of my neck, letting out a sharp breath as I clenched my muscles around him.

"Keep doing that and I won't be able to go slow," he warned, gazing down into my eyes.

"You complaining?" I asked breathlessly, doing it again. He threw in a couple of hard thrusts, making me arch my body up against him and moan.

"I love the noises you make when I'm inside you." He nipped my neck again and slowed the pace back down.

"Still can't make me scream." I smirked up at him, rolling my body to follow his every movement.

"Aw hell, you asked for this." He grabbed my legs once more and slid them up to his shoulders. Picking up a merciless pace he drove in fiercely, withdrawing almost completely before slamming back in, nearly driving me into the wall with every move. As my head started to move from side to side he wrapped one long arm around my leg and placed his thumb on my clitoris, allowing the motions of our two bodies to rub them together.

I climaxed with a high keening noise bursting from my throat. Not exactly a scream, but I guess he was making progress towards that goal. He came not long after with a staccato burst of thrusts, grunting with the effort. Releasing my legs to go back behind his thighs he rested his head in the crook of my neck while he gathered his breath, all the while running his fingers down the side of my face and neck softly. After a short time he rolled to the side and gathered me against him, spooning behind me.

"If you promise that every morning I could start waking up earlier." I laughed and wriggled round to face him, pushing until he was lying on his back and let me snuggle in full length against his side. "And I'm pretty sure that was longer than two minutes."

"I guess you could be right." I raised my head and glanced at my watch. "Yep, that would be nearer an hour in all." I felt my eyelids becoming heavy and I rested my head back in the hollow of his shoulder, resting an arm across his waist and one leg over his. "Damn, I love you," I muttered as I drifted off to sleep.

The alarm went off just over an hour later. I dragged myself reluctantly out of bed and into the shower, wincing slightly at the soreness as I moved. He really hadn't held back at the end there and with a guy of his size, over three hundred pounds, it was going to have a lasting effect.

I was just washing my hair when the shower door opened behind me. Looking back over my shoulder I watched Mark step in and shut the door behind him.

"Are you ill?" He just grunted at me in response. "Don't normally see you for about another hour." Then I started spluttering as he pushed my head under the showerhead, leaving me spitting out shampoo. "You are so going to pay for that," I laughed wiping the suds away from my face with my forearm.

"Did you mean that?" he asked quietly.

"Oh yes, you are going to pay."

"Not that. What you said earlier." I looked at him, puzzled. "You said you love me."

My jaw kind of dropped. I hadn't realised that I had said that out loud. I was convinced that I had just thought it.

"I, er, didn't know I said it out loud." I turned my back to him again and reached for the soap, trying to cover up my dismay. I mean, what's the quickest way to scare off a man? Yep, got it in one.

"You did." He plucked the soap out of my hand and put it back on the shelf. So, did you mean it?"

"What's the good answer?" I giggled nervously.

"The truth." He spun me back round to face him. "So, did you?"

Not fair trying to distract me by coming into the shower naked! I tried to fix my eyes on his chest rather than anywhere else and succeeded, mostly.

"I'm waiting." He put a finger under my chin, forcing me to look up into his face. I just nodded. "Hmm. I see," was all that he said, instead picking up the shampoo and washing his hair. I finished washing quickly and slipped out, leaving him the shower to himself.

He hadn't given me any reaction to what I had said. To be honest I didn't expect one. It was just such a messed up time for him, and Sara was weighing heavily on his mind. I felt like my life had turned into a giant rollercoaster; every time we hit a high point it was somehow followed by a rapid plunge downhill.

"I might as well come to breakfast with you." I jumped, having been so caught up in my thoughts I hadn't heard him come out.

"Sure. I just need to make sure I've got everything I need for this signing this morning." I quickly found my itinerary for the morning and smiled at him. "Let's go eat."

He chuckled. "Darlin', I thought I already did."

He slung an arm round my shoulder as we made our way to the restaurant. Once we got inside however, I stopped quickly and shrugged it off.

"Shit, I don't believe it."

"What?" He sounded confused.

"It's that girl. The one from last night. She's a damn waitress here."


	11. Chapter 11

"So what now?" Mark asked, leaning against the wall by the restaurant door. I looked around quickly to see if Dave was there.

"He's not here. Glen's over there though. We could go sit with him and see if Dave's been in. He shouldn't be late this morning as he's on the signing later.

"Morning," Glen said cheerfully when he saw us approach. He looked a bit confused when Mark sat next to him and I sat opposite. "What's going on?"

I frowned. "Has Dave been in yet?" He shook his head. "The girl from last night is a waitress in here. Keep an eye out in case he comes in, OK?" Glen just shrugged and nodded. "I am going to be so glad to get away from this place." I ran my hands through my hair.

"Jade, you might want to wear your hair loose for a while," Glen said suddenly. I looked at him, puzzled. "If you're still trying to pull off this whole married to Batista thing, it's not too convincing when you have a beard rash down your neck." I ripped the elastic band out of my hair and started laughing.

"See, that's why I have to be an honest person. Too damn ditzy to remember to cover my tracks."

"That the only reason?" Mark growled from beside Glen who gave him an uneasy look.

I felt my jaw clench tight and forced it to relax. "No, that's just how I am. It was just a joke. I thought I made myself perfectly clear last night."

Glen was really starting to look uncomfortable. "Look, Batista's just walked in." He sounded relieved, obviously thinking that might relieve the atmosphere. Mark turned back to his breakfast without another word while I stood and quickly made my way over to Dave. He looked surprised when I went up on tiptoes and kissed him firmly on the lips. I wrapped my arms round his shoulders and pulled him down to whisper in his ear.

"Play along. The girl from last night works here." He made a small sound of assent and followed me. I stopped shortly before we reached the table where Glen and Mark were sitting. "Just watch Taker. He's still not happy."

"Looks like an understatement," he muttered as we started moving again.

"Nope, that's pretty normal when he's eating. I can tell though." We reached the table. I slid in first and Dave sat on the outside. He and Glen managed to make conversation while Mark glowered at nothing in particular and I watched him, trying not to be too obvious about it.

"Hi, I'm Sandy. What can I … Oh, it's you." I looked up at the girl from the night before standing by Dave's side, order pad in her hand. I opened my mouth to say something but was interrupted.

"Is there a Jade Baron in here?"

"That's me." I stood and looked to the door where a man was brandishing a piece of paper.

"Message for you." He came over and handed it over.

"I thought you were Mrs Batista." Sandy put a hand on her hip, looking at me challengingly.

"Sweetheart, I work. I kept my own name." I opened the message. "Karen's ill. Looks like I have you lot all to myself this morning." I grinned at Dave and Glen.

"So what do you do?" Damn, this girl was persistent.

"I also work for the WWE, as a travelling liaison. What better way to get to see my man all the time?" I put a hand on Dave's shoulder as I sat back down. "Now, could you please bring me a coffee?"

Dave gave her his order and turned to me when she left. "You know, I think it could end up being a bad idea to get on the wrong side of you."

"What on earth do you mean? I was perfectly polite."

"There's just something about you that says don't mess with me."

"Ah, you're just still whipped from that time I shouted at you. No one else thinks I'm vaguely scary."

"I never said you were scary." He slid an arm along the back of my seat as the waitress approached with our order. I heard Mark make a noise in his throat, but could do nothing about it as Sandy was at the table placing out our stuff.

"I'll see you later anyway," she said as she picked up the empty tray. "My shift is over soon and I'm coming to get autographs."

"We'll look forward to it, won't we baby?" I offered her a saccharine sweet smile as I picked up my coffee. She wrinkled her nose at me and left.

"See, that's what I'm talking about. You're not scary, just… nasty." Dave removed his arm from the back of my chair and started to eat.

"As I'm clearly not needed I'll make a move." Mark pushed his chair back and got to his feet. Glen looked at the three of us, clearly unsettled.

"Mark, wait." I pushed my way past the back of Dave's chair. "Will you be here or at the arena when I get back?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I'll probably have the car though, so you'll have to get a lift. Doubt you're short of volunteers." He turned and walked away. I just stood and stared after him until a hand came down on my shoulder.

"Come on. Leave him for the moment." Glen guided me to the seat that Mark had just left. Dave picked up his coffee and regarded me over the top of it.

"Didn't work well last night then."

"I've been meaning to thank you for that. Things were OK last night and seemed fine this morning." I played with my loose hair, making Glen snort.

"Too much information for my liking!"

I shook my head. "Shut it, you great brute." He put on a hurt expression, making me smile. I turned back to Dave. "He was fine until we got in here and saw her." I jerked my head towards where Sandy was finishing clearing a table, obviously her last ask before finishing her shift. "He can't seem to see what I'm actually doing at the moment. He's got a pretty big hang up over it. We both know why." Dave nodded, Glen just looked confused. "Long story Glen, and I'm afraid I really don't feel like going through it again. Long and short of it is Mark is convinced I'm about to jump on Dave at any moment." He gave a surprised snort but didn't make a comment.

"Did you tell him where you were last night?" Dave asked.

"It kind of slipped out, but I explained exactly what happened. He went a bit funny about it but calmed down again. God knows I love the guy, but right now… What?" Both of them had stopped what they were doing and were staring at me.

"You told him that?"

I turned to Glen. Realising what I had said I wiped my hand over my face. "Did it again, huh? Yeah, it kind of came out this morning."

"Way too much information again."

"Pack it in, Glen. That's not what I meant. He's just driving me to distraction. I know he's got his own problems at the moment that I can't really help with, and that's got me pretty much all on edge." I laced my fingers together on the table and stared at them. Glen made an enquiring noise.

"Sara's back in contact." Dave clarified the situation for him.

"Ouch," Glen said, leaning back in his chair. "What does she want?"

"That's just it," I sighed. "We don't know. All she's told him is that she wants to meet up with him when we're in Florida. So everything's left kind of hanging. In the mean time, I'd better go make sure every one else for this morning is up and at 'em. At least we've got transport laid on for this one as it's nearly an hour away."

The transport was probably the fanciest little bus I had ever seen. I ticked each titleholder off the list as they climbed on. There was Dave as the heavyweight champion, Glen and big Paul as the tag team, Chris Benoit as the US champ, Trish as the women's, Gregory Helms as cruiserweight and Chris Jericho as the Intercontinental. I stifled a groan when I saw his companion come out. I'd completely forgotten that Annie was his valet.

"OK guys," I said as I climbed on last of all, "Karen is ill, so it's just me this time. We should be there in just under an hour and we're scheduled to be there for three hours. It's likely to be packed out, so you need to keep them moving as much as possible."

"We're all pros, you know," a sarcastic comment came from the back.

"Yes Chris, professional pains in the butt, mostly. Just play nicely, and we'll all get along fine." I crumpled up a piece of paper and threw it at his head. "Got it?" I ducked as the paper came flying back, laughing at the pout on Jericho's face when he realised he had missed. Still with a broad grin on my face, I sank into a seat and the bus moved off. It didn't last long.

"So Jade!" Annie's voice came from back near Chris. "I hear you got dumped last night."

I peered round the side of the seat. "Where the hell did you hear that?"

"Apparently you were trying to get in that make up girl's room late last night. And you were seen in the bar looking miserable. Sounds fairly conclusive to me."

I thought for a moment. "Well that's just inconsiderate isn't it?" She looked a little bemused. "You'd think if he dumped me last night, he would have had the decency to tell me about it before I got back in his bed." I caught myself before I lost it. The frustration was really starting to get to me, and there was obviously gossip beginning to do the rounds. There was no point in flying off the handle though, especially to someone like Annie who probably wouldn't think twice about trying to get me in trouble. I just stared out of the window for the rest of the trip, occupied with my own thoughts.

I had been right about one thing. The queue for the signing was massive and the cheering started as soon as the doors were open on the bus. This was Annie's first session in the WWE, and it took her a little while to pick up the flow that the real professionals had of making each fan feel like they had spent some time with them while keeping the line moving. Signings were something I had definitely come to enjoy since I had started doing them and this one was really no different.

The UK was going through a heat wave and by the time an hour had gone past it was getting almost unbearably hot. The wrestlers were in the shade, but some of the fans waiting were beginning to suffer a bit in the heat. After that first hour had gone by I went down the table, passing out bottles of water.

The girl, Sandy, showed up just as she had said she would. I saw her when she was about half a dozen places back from the start of the table, and wandered my way down to the far end where Dave was. Putting a hand on his shoulder when he was between fans, I leant over and murmured to him that she was on her way. When I straightened again I just took a couple of steps back, remaining standing behind him rather than returning to level with the middle of the table. It wasn't as if she could do much in the middle of a crowd of people, but I made my presence known anyway.

Finally the session was over and I packed up everything to go back on the bus. The trip back was filled with a good-natured USA versus Canada argument. The bus was split fifty fifty because British Annie claimed to prefer Canada, so I was appealed to to cast a deciding vote.

"Don't ask me, I've never been to Canada. Anyway, I'm English and we colonised the pair of you, so there." I grinned as threats rained in on me from all sides. They were so easy to wind up.

Once we got back to the hotel I figured I had better go and see if Mark was still there. He wasn't. I grabbed a bag with some gym gear in it. There was a gym near the arena that had opened its doors to the WWE employees while the company was in town. I figured that if nothing else was going to go right, at least I could count on exercise to make me feel better.

I managed to catch a lift to the arena with Glen. At least that couldn't cause me any more problems. The drive over was very quiet. I seemed to have used up my store of conversation during the morning and was very grateful to him for letting me ride in silence. He didn't speak until we were in the arena car park.

"You're quiet."

I gave a sarcastic little laugh. "Are you saying I'm not normally?"

"No, you're not. Come get some lunch from catering."

"I don't know, Glen. From what Annie was saying the gossip mill is starting up." I pulled on the end of the braid I had put my hair into ready for the gym.

"You shut her up pretty quick though. Come on, I know for a fact you didn't eat any breakfast. Besides, you know how Mark's stomach is. He's probably already in there." He set off towards catering, leaving me to trail in his wake. Some die-hard fans were already along the barriers, trying to get a glimpse of their favourites before they entered the arena. Somehow I wasn't surprised to see Sandy amongst them, looking at me with a calculating expression on her face.

I picked up my bag from the asphalt and hurried after Glen. As with Mark, I had no chance of keeping up with him, especially when he had a head start, so didn't actually catch up with him until I got into catering. I wasn't particularly hungry and, mindful of wanting to get into the gym fairly soon afterwards, just grabbed a sandwich and some juice before sitting across a table from him. He snorted dismissively at what I'd picked up and started to eat his own towering plateful of food. As it was, I only eat half of it before pushing it away, pulling a face.

"You shouldn't let it get to you." I glanced up as he broke the silence. "And you should eat properly."

"I'm not one of the kids you used to teach, Mr Jacobs." He grinned at my comment. "I can't help it. I'm a thinker. No matter how hard I think at the moment I can't seem to work out what he wants me to do though."

"I doubt there's an easy answer. There never is with him."

"Pretty much what I thought. Glen… tell me about Sara." His head shot up suddenly. "I mean it. That's a major part of what's up with him and I need to know what I'm up against. You've known Mark for years, maybe even before they met. Do you think he'd go back to her?"

Glen put down his fork and blew out a huge breath. "All right, if you really want to know. They seemed made for each other. She was young, younger than you I think, and a real stunner. More than that, they just seemed to connect. It was a real surprise when he told me about the divorce. I guess Sara was just sick of him never being home. She just went around trying to persuade him the wrong way. Annoyed him so much he solved the problem his own way." He looked at me and shrugged. "If she says she wants him back and lets him do his job… I don't know. I really don't know what he'd do."

"He told me he doesn't look back."

Glen offered me a rueful smile. "I think if anyone could make him…"

"It would be Sara," I finished the statement for him. "Well, thanks for being honest with me, Glen. If anyone wants me, I'll be in the gym."

As I walked the short distance to the gym and got changed I really didn't know if I felt better or worse for Glen's honesty. And it hadn't helped much, either. At times I thought I should walk away from Mark for the sake of my own sanity and because I was convinced that Sara would want him back, and get him. If I'd been in her position, I doubt I would have let him go in the first place. The other side of that was the fact that I was travelling with him. It was probably much tougher on the wives that stayed at home. The flip side of my current mental argument came from the day before. I knew that his behaviour had been far from the norm, but he had seemed to need me and it had felt like making love rather than having sex.

I walked out into the gym and jumped on a treadmill, hoping that a good hard run would get my mind off the subject. When that didn't work I went to lifting weights. The great thing about weights is that the only person you can compete against is yourself. My concentration wasn't right though, and I gave up before I did myself an injury by not lifting properly.

Looking around the gym for something that didn't take too much concentration, I saw a punch bag hanging in the corner. I'd had a go at kickboxing at one point. I wasn't very good at it – in fact the guy that had taught me claimed that if it came down to a fight between the punch bag and me the bag would win. Right at that second I wouldn't have wanted to take that bet.

I lost it completely once I started hitting that bag. All of the frustration, tension and the rigidly controlled temper were channelled through my fists. This was far worse than when I got drunk in my apartment in Houston. After a time angry tears began to roll down my cheeks. I just left them to fall, concentrating on punishing the bag in front of me – or was it myself I was angry at?

I had always known that I wasn't necessarily an easy person to live with. My family were never backward in coming forward to tell me that. I could be sarcastic and opinionated with people I knew well and at times had a tendency to state what was on my mind without pausing to think of anyone else's feelings. Having been told so many times that I was difficult had left me with a tendency to think that anything going wrong with the people around me was my fault. Therefore the possibility that my current problems with Mark were my fault crossed my mind from time to time.

That train of thought made me even angrier with myself. I hadn't really done anything wrong that I could see. In fact I had been, for me, incredibly passive and submissive through the whole thing. In the back of my mind I wondered if that was what Dave had been trying to tell me the night before.

I don't know how long I was there for, or how much longer I would have been there if someone hadn't grabbed my arm. As it was I was in such a state of tunnel vision that I span round and landed a couple of punches on the person before realising what I was doing. I dropped my hands, breathing heavily, and stared at the floor.

"What the hell are you doing? You're bleeding."

I glanced at my fists, still tightly clenched. Most of the knuckles on my right hand were split, and a couple on the left. I had been so caught up in what I was doing that I'd not thought about protecting my hands.

"Go get your gear. I'll take you to the trainers at the arena."

I raised my eyes enough to see the two bloody marks on Glen's shirt where I had hit him. "Sorry," I muttered.

"You do realise that the show starts in less than an hour? You've been here for hours. I've just been warming up in here and watching you." That surprised me. I knew I had been there for a while but nowhere near that amount of time. Thinking hard I realised I had spent a long time sat on the weight bench, just staring into the distance while my mind freewheeled. I needed to get my life sorted out, and quickly, before I drove myself insane.

After a trip to the trainers and a shower, I made myself settle into my usual routine of watching the show from a monitor near the gorilla area. Strangely enough it was a fairly good place to be left in peace. Everyone going past you on the way out was busy thinking about what they had to do out there and generally on the way back in were thinking of what they had done. Little old me sat on the floor in a corner with my arms wrapped round my shins and chin resting on my knees got virtually no attention at all. At least to begin with.

"You and I need to talk." I looked up to see Tara standing over me. "Come with me." I shrugged and got up stiffly, stretching out my sore back and arms. She led me through the hallways and through a door into a locker room. "Sit." She pointed at a chair. Sighing, I did as I was told.

"So, talk."

She folded her arms over her chest. "Actually, I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have said what I did at the club last night."

"Forget about it. Anyway, I shouldn't have taken your head off like I did."

"Truce?" she asked, a slight smile on her face.

"Yeah, truce. More importantly, who was the guy in your room?"

"Please! I'm not telling you that!" she laughed.

"OK then, I'll have to guess. Obviously it wasn't Taker, or Batista 'cos I saw both of them pretty much straight after I knocked on your door. I'm getting ahead of myself though. One of the company?" She blushed and nodded. "OK, I assuming male?"

"Yeuchh, of course!" she exclaimed.

"Just checking. Back stage or front of house?"

"A wrestler." She was really red now.

"Title holder?" They were the first to my mind as I had been with them all that morning.

"Yes."

"Must be an singles champion then. Hmm, heavyweight or cruiserweight division?"

"Cruiserweight." She examined her nails intently before realising how easily I had got the answer out of her.

"Helms? As in used to dress up as a green super hero? Wow, I'll admit that's a surprise. Wouldn't have thought he'd be your type."

"It was just a bit of fun. You know how it is." She stood up suddenly, hand going to her pocket as her phone beeped. "I'm going to get a drink. Do you want me to bring you back one?"

"I'll come with you." I stood up as well, before looking around the locker room we were in, seeing a bag I recognised. "Tara, why did you bring me to Mark's locker room?" I turned round and she had gone. Shaking my head, I went to follow her and opened the door, coming face to face with Mark just back from his match. It looked like someone thought Mark and I should talk somewhere quiet.

"Looking for me?" He stepped inside and shut the door behind him.

"Not exactly. More steered in your direction I think."

He grunted. "Show me your hands." Rolling my eyes I held my hands out. They had been cleaned up but scabs were starting to form making it look a bit worse than it was. He brushed his thumb over the knuckles gently. I hissed a bit as the tender flesh was touched. "They're going to be sore for a few days."

"I'll live." I took a pace back from him.

"Wait here while I have a shower? There are some things we need to get straight." I nodded reluctantly and sank back down on the chair I had occupied before. As always my mind tried to betray me with images of what he was doing and it was all I could do to stop myself walking in there and joining him. The night before had shown me that doing that would most likely resolve absolutely nothing.

I didn't have to wait long before he came back out, towel wrapped round his waist. I looked up from where I had been prodding the broken skin on my knuckles. It's something I could never understand – the fascination with prodding something that hurts. Everyone has a slight masochistic streak I suppose. Mark got dressed in silence and then sat in a chair opposite me, arms folded and legs stretched out in front of him. I waited for him to speak while he just sat there watching me. After a few minutes I couldn't tolerate the silence any more.

"I guess you've been talking to Glen," I said. Mark cocked his head to one side, eyebrow raised. I held up my right hand, knuckles out towards him.

"He told me you asked him about Sara." I nodded, looking away to the side of him. "He also told me what he said to you." I grimaced at that. In hindsight I hadn't really wanted to hear what Glen had told me. "Is that why you did that?"

I cleared my throat. "Partly."

He sighed. "And the rest?"

"I think you probably know the answer to that." He gave me the ghost of a nod. "Mark, you're driving me mad. You know I love you, I've told you that much."

"Without meaning to."

"OK, I didn't mean to say it out loud, but that doesn't change the way I feel. But I just can't understand why you won't trust me. What is it you think I'm going to do? And why?" I leant forward, elbows on my knees. When he didn't reply, I carried on. "OK, I know what you think I'd do, and I don't see any point in going over that ground again. What I really don't get is why you'd think I would do that. I'm pretty sure I should be the insecure one here, not both of us."

He looked vaguely annoyed. "I'm not insecure."

"Bad choice of words maybe. You've been pretty unbalanced about this thing with Batista though. Still, we leave for Glasgow tomorrow morning and that should be the end of it."

"I guess so. I don't know what makes you so bothered either. We both knew that this was a laid back kind of thing." He looked at me when I snorted. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"Mark, have you ever been laid back about anything? You've been saying one thing and doing something completely different. You've made it clear since day one that I'm your territory and you won't tolerate any messing about. I'm fine with that. I have no desire to mess around with anyone else anyway." I ran my hands through my loose hair, cursing hotly when the hair pulled at a cut on a knuckle.

"What about 'what happens, happens'?" He sat up slightly, watching me closely.

"Jesus, Mark, don't play with me. I tried, but I'm past that now. I'm hooked and, frankly, a little scared."

"Scared? What of?" He seemed puzzled by the concept.

"I shouldn't have talked to Glen. I'd have been better off not knowing." I stood up quickly and began to pace up and down the room. Mark stayed where he was and just followed me with his eyes.

"Sara." His voice was flat. You're worried about Sara."

I span round. "Of course I am. What will you do if she comes walking in and says she wants to try again? The fact you're so worried about it tells me something."

"I told you I don't look back. You know me better than that by now."

"No, Mark, I don't. I barely really know you at all. Yesterday proved that. I've never seen you like that, so quiet and gentle. Yesterday you made me fall in love with you. I've never felt like this before." He pulled a face. "I'm not trying to put any pressure on you. I'm not asking you to feel the same way. I'm just in over my head here. I've got something, someone I never would have thought possible and I can see it all disappearing."

He stood finally and put a hand on my shoulder as I walked past him, pulling me into his chest and wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I screwed my eyes up against the tears that wanted to come and put both hands flat on his chest, feeling the vibration as he spoke.

"Right now I'm not going anywhere. And don't you worry about Sara. I'll sort her out when I see her. Why are you so convinced she wants me back anyway?"

I shook my head against his chest. "Because if I was her I wouldn't have let you go."

He didn't speak but I felt his arm tighten sharply before letting me go. He picked up his stuff and turned back towards me. I couldn't look any higher than his chest.

"Get your stuff. We'll go back to the hotel."


	12. Chapter 12

I felt fairly uneasy on the ride back to the hotel, and as we went up to our room. I'd said a lot of things that, looking back, I wouldn't necessarily have chosen to say. All the stuff about how I felt was pretty full on, especially after being reminded so baldly that this was supposed to be a fairly casual affair. What else could it have been when it started as just living up to the gossip that was spreading at the time?

"What now?" I asked, perching on the edge of the couch.

"We're going to order dinner from room service. While we're waiting I guess you should go talk to Batista, sort out what you're going to do about breakfast in case that damn waitress is there." I glanced up at him sharply, trying to read his expression. His face was blank so I just nodded. "After dinner we'll just crash in front of the TV for a while."

"Sounds good to me." I picked up the remote and started flicking through the channels. It felt quite nostalgic, finding programmes that I hadn't seen in months. There hadn't been much about my home country that I had missed apart from the obvious family and such, but some of the TV had been sorely missed.

"What do you want to eat?" Mark asked, staring at the room service menu.

"You want the sensible answer or the not sensible answer?" I glanced up from the TV screen.

"I'm not sure I'm even going to ask about the not sensible answer. You want a steak?"

"Yep. Pity though, I think you may have rather like the not sensible option." He didn't reply, just shot me an amused look as he picked up the phone to place our order.

"You'd better run along and do your business," he said as he put down the receiver. "Food won't be long." I hauled myself to my feet and trailed two doors down.

Dave looked concerned when he opened the door. "More trouble?"

"Nah, I'm actually here on bosses orders. Just wanted to know if you're going to have breakfast in the restaurant in the morning and, if so, what time you were going down? Just in case that Sandy is about. Get the final act of this farce over and done with." I leant against the doorframe as he thought about it.

"How about I meet you by the elevator at seven thirty? Every one is supposed to be getting away early as the show is tomorrow night."

"OK. See you then." I stepped away from the door and made to head back to my room when he called me back.

"Are you OK?" He pointed at my hands.

"So, you're not the only one who can't keep his mouth shut! Yeah, I'm OK. Guess it all just had to come out somewhere." I gave him a faint smile.

"Listen," he said, stepping slightly out of his room. "You know you can come to me if you need someone to talk to, right? I still owe you one."

I gave him a much wider smile. "The Animal going soft on me now?" He pulled a face and mimed swiping a paw at me. "Thanks, although you may end up regretting that. See you in the morning."

I got back into our room just before the food showed up. Mark had got to know my eating habits pretty well as my steak was perfectly cooked, very rare, and with a green salad on the side. There was beer to go with it as well. I smiled to myself before tucking in. It was exactly the same meal I'd eaten on our first date.

After dinner, Mark settled down to find a movie to watch while I ran through the hotel list for Glasgow. I was supposed to have done it earlier that day but with everything else that had happened it had slipped my mind until now. At least it didn't take long. There were just the hotel rooms to check through, no flights or car rentals.

"What do you feel like watching?" Mark dropped the remote on the couch between us, obviously not having found inspiration. "Action, comedy, horror?"

"Horror. Nothing too gory though. Not in the mood for that tonight." I put the papers aside and stretched right from top to toe. I glanced up at the list of films he was looking at and shook my head as he paused over one. "I swear that if you put Blade 3 on I will beat you to death with Hunter's sledgehammer."

"Not one of your favourites then," he grinned.

"Never did like most sequels anyway. Hey, Tommyknockers! I haven't seen that in ages." He shrugged and selected it. We both liked Stephen King's stuff, so it was an easy option.

Not much bothers me. I can sit through just about any horror film made without too many ill effects. Apart from one thing. I have one phobia, just the one but it's a pretty bad one. Having not seen the film for so long, I'd forgotten about one scene in it.

There's a woman in the film who starts to get very suspicious about what is going on out in the woods. She's a collector and has a huge collection of dolls. They come to life and kill her. Just the sight of an ordinary doll was enough to send me hiding in a corner. I once went to visit a stately home in the UK with my mother and ex-husband. It had dolls all over the place dressed in period costumes. Ben had spent the whole day dragging me out of dark corners and walking me through rooms with his hands over my eyes. And these little buggers in the film came to life and moved.

As soon as they came on screen I went rigid and grabbed the arm of the couch. When they started moving I squeaked and shot behind the couch. I was shaking so hard I could hear my teeth chattering and felt really sick. My heart felt as if it was about to come bursting through my ribs it was beating so hard and fast.

"What the hell are you doing back there?"

"Have they gone?" I managed to get the words out through a tightly clenched jaw.

"Have what gone?" He sounded bemused.

"The things. The dolls." I could feel cold sweat on my forehead.

"You're scared of dolls? Why would anybody be scared of dolls?" He got up and came round to where I was crouching and stood looking down on me, hands on hips.

"They have eyes. They watch me." I was still visibly shaking and, going on what had happened to me before, I knew I was probably extremely pale. Mark glanced quickly back at the screen.

"Yes, they've gone. Come on." He held a hand out to me. I shook my head and remained firmly where I was. With an exasperated sigh he crouched down beside me and picked me up, walking back to the front of the couch and sitting with me in his lap. As the shaking began to calm I wound my arms up round his shoulders and buried my face in his neck, breathing in his distinctive masculine smell.

"Better?" he asked. I nodded and relaxed my grip around his shoulders slightly. "Good. Now go and answer your phone."

I got up reluctantly and padded over to the table and picked up my phone. It showed an unfamiliar UK phone number.

"Hello?"

"Hi Jade. We didn't get to talk the other night."

"Uh, hi Ben. You OK?" I turned to see Mark watching me. I just shrugged.

"Yeah, fine. Just wanted to catch up on things. Where are you?"

"Manchester. There was a show tonight, so we've just had dinner and we're watching the Tommyknockers."

He snorted. "You have remembered the scene with the…"

"Yeah, the dolls." I shivered at the memory. "I'd forgotten about it. Mark just had to dig me out from behind the couch."

He laughed down the line. "You remember that day, oh where was it?"

"Longleat. Yes, I seem to recall you spent the entire day digging me out of corners. I haven't been to one of those places since." I walked to the bed and sat on the end of it.

"So you're with Mark then are you?" There was a hint of something in his words.

"No need to say it quite like that, but yes I am. Anyway, tell me about this new little girlfriend that my mother seems to adore." I was genuinely curious. I think I've mentioned before that Ben and I got on well after the divorce, becoming the friends we probably should always have been.

He went quiet for a few seconds. "Well, her name is Jenny and she's a veterinary nurse. She's twenty-three."

"Twenty-three? Cradle snatcher! That's eleven years!" I stretched out on my front across the bed, phone held to my ear and chin propped in the other hand.

"And just what is the age gap between you and Mark?"

"Ten years," I muttered. "But that's different."

He snorted. "Should have known it would be. Explain."

"Hey, tough guy, divorce papers mean I don't have to explain myself to you any more. As I'm in a good mood though, I will. Professional athlete versus prematurely middle-aged ex-farmer. Not rocket science dearest."

"Ouch, I'm hurt." He laughed again. "Have you spoken to your Mum since I saw you?"

"We went down there yesterday." Had it really only been the day before? It felt like it had been days ago.

"We? You took him into the lion's den?" Ben sounded surprised. "How was it?"

"Not as bad as I thought it might be. Hadn't really expected everyone to be there and you know exactly what Julia and Louise are like." I heard the noise of assent he made in his throat. "And of course I got roped into carting for a couple of hours. Mum tried hard to be nice to him but she just finds him a bit overwhelming I think."

"And the two witches?" That made me really laugh. He'd always been suspicious of Julia and Louise.

"Oh, they sat and cackled amongst themselves in a corner. They'll never change."

I could almost hear him smile down the phone. "Jenny and I are getting married in the autumn. On a beach in the Caribbean." He sounded very proud of what he was doing.

"Very romantic. And a bit different to a boring registry office on a cold wet winter's day." I rolled my eyes at the memory.

"Would you come?" That got me sitting up straight.

"You want me to come to your wedding? I don't think the bride would like that."

"I talked to her about it before I called. She's fine with it. Jade, fourteen years is a long time. We may have divorced, but you are still my friend." He sounded earnest, one of the traits my mother had been so keen on.

"Let me think about it. Send me an invite with the where and when and I'll let you know." I really wasn't sure, but would think about it.

"OK. When do you head back off to the States?"

"Uh, Glasgow tomorrow, Dublin the day after then three days in Germany. Then we head back to the east coast to finish the build up to Summerslam in Florida." As always at the moment the mention of Florida got a slight reaction from Mark. He glanced over his shoulder at me and then quickly away.

"Pretty busy then," Ben observed.

"Yeah, this next three weeks is pretty mad. Depending on how things go in Florida I might get home to Houston for a couple of days or I might take a trip up to Chicago to see Andy. Right now though, I have to be up and ready to go to breakfast at half seven in the morning." I gave him my address in Houston to send the invitation to and promised to let him know whether or not I would be going. Dropping the phone back on the table I returned to the couch and sat next to Mark.

"Ben, huh?" He looked at me out of the corner of his eye.

"Mmm. Just wanted to talk, you know. We didn't get a chance either during or after the show in London." I settled back into the couch, legs tucked up underneath me.

"You're still friendly then."

"We've known each other for fourteen years. Should have just stuck to being friends after we split the first time. That was a little weird though."

"Why?" I could see him eyeing me suspiciously.

"He's inviting me to his wedding. In the autumn, sorry, fall, in the Caribbean. To a little blonde twenty-three year old vet nurse." I shook my head.

"I heard the cradle-snatching comment. That what you think I'm doing?"

I glared at him before realising that the corner of his mouth was curling up. "Pack it in," I grinned, giving him a shove, which, as usual, failed to move him an inch. "I just think an age gap of that size is much less noticeable at thirty than it is at twenty-three. And half the time Ben acts older than you anyway, even though he's only four years older than me."

"Uh-huh. So, how old do you think I act?" Mark asked, stretching out an arm and pulling me until I was nestled into his shoulder.

"When you get an idea fixed in your head, about twelve." I prodded him in the ribs, making him growl at me.

"Shut up and watch the damn film."

He seemed to slip back into the quiet contemplative mood of the day before as we watched the rest of the film, the hand of the arm around me moving restlessly back and forth on my hip. I caught hold of his other hand and laced my fingers through his, enjoying the quiet closeness. It was very late when the film finished, around one thirty in the morning so we just went to bed. After the rollercoaster of a day I was incredibly tired and soon went to sleep with Mark's arms wrapped around me.

I woke reluctantly when the alarm went off the next morning. I tried to move to turn it off but couldn't. Glancing down I saw Mark's arm still wrapped round my waist, his forearm laying up the front of my body, holding me close as he spooned behind me. His other arm lay under my neck. I reached a hand behind me and put it on his hip, shaking him gently.

"Hey, I've got to get up." He made an indistinct noise in his throat and just pulled me in tighter. "I've got to go to breakfast, remember? I need to shower and get dressed. You need to get up too. We should leave early if we want to get to Glasgow at a reasonable time." He grunted and rolled onto his back, releasing me to shut off the infernal alarm.

After a quick shower, I pulled out some clothes for the day ahead and packed everything else up in my bag. Not having time to dry my hair properly I just towel dried it as best as I could and left it loose. For some reason I felt like wearing a skirt that day and pulled on one that went down to just below mid thigh. Putting a white silk shirt over the top, I ran a brush through my hair.

"Right, I'd better go meet Dave. Are you coming down to breakfast?" I looked over to where Mark still lay on the bed.

"Do you have to be so damn happy in the mornings?" he grumbled. "Yeah, I'll be down before long." I smiled and bent down to give him a kiss before stepping back to avoid the hand trying to sneak under my skirt without me noticing. Shaking my head and tutting at him, I left the room to wait by the elevator for Dave.

"Ah, honey, you dressed up for me!" I turned to see Dave walking down the corridor after I had waited for a couple of minutes. "How are the hands?" I held my right hand out for him to see. He took hold of it and looked at the scabs on the knuckles. "Not doing too bad then. Here, this might help." He lifted my hand up and kissed one of the knuckles gently before grinning at me.

"Are you always this much of a flirt?" I asked, retrieving my hand from him.

He shrugged and the grin widened. "Pretty much."

"Well then, next time you get yourself a little fan girl who won't take no for an answer, you're on your own." I turned my back to him and stepped into the elevator.

"You look tired. Did I keep you up all night?" he asked as the elevator started to move.

"If that's what you want to say. We got watching a film that didn't end until late."

"Things OK then?" He moved up to stand beside me and got hold of my hand as we reached the ground floor.

"Seem to be at the moment. Let's get this thing over with."

Breakfast was a surprisingly peaceful affair for the most part. We got a different waitress this time, although Sandy could be seen serving other tables and throwing dark glances our way from time to time. Mark came down about ten minutes after we got in there and sat at the next table over, talking to Glen and JBL.

I could tell Dave was up to something. He kept shooting me little sidelong looks and smirking to himself. We'd finished eating when he leaned over as if he was going to say something quietly in my ear. I leaned closer to hear him. That's when he did it. Rattled that damn stud along the inside of his teeth. I sat straight back up and glared at him. He just shot me a grin and did it again. I closed my eyes and prayed for the strength not to clout him in the middle of the restaurant.

"I need to go finish packing. I'll see you outside." I stood up quickly and hurried to the restaurant door. I looked back over my shoulder to see he had also risen from the table and gone to speak to Mark.

I got up to our room and stepped quickly inside, shutting the door and leaning back against the wall. These superstars were going to be the death of me, one way or another. I jumped when the lock clicked and the door opened.

"Apparently you want to speak to me urgently?" Mark appeared round the door.

I pushed the door out of his hand, shutting it quickly. I wanted him right enough, but talking was the last thing on my mind. He wasn't expecting it when I pushed him and stepped back so his back was against the wall. He soon caught on when I started tearing at his belt buckle and dipped a hand under my skirt.

"Hell, darlin', you want it bad." He picked me up as soon as his jeans were off enough to free him and swung me round so my back was to the wall. Abandoning all the pleasantries he pushed himself straight into me and began to thrust powerfully. For once I was the aggressor, digging my nails into his shoulder and back, biting down his neck to where it joined his shoulder. I was so worked up it didn't take long for me to come, biting down hard on the top of his shoulder. It was hard enough to make him swear under his breath as he drove on to his own completion, face buried in my neck as he found his release.

He slid me gently down until I was on my feet. My legs very wobbly but supported me, just. I looked up at him. He was looking at me with a strange expression.

"You want to tell me what brought that on? I'm not complaining, but you kind of took me by surprise there." I smiled and heaved a contented sigh. I knew he'd never seen me like that. A little more of the way I could be had just shown itself to him.

"Just blew up all of a sudden," I replied. There was no way I was going to tell him what had actually started me off. Anyway, it wouldn't really have mattered who was attached to the tongue stud – it was the thing itself that did it for me. "I'm just going to clean up and then we should go." I let him drive to Glasgow. When we got to the car my legs still weren't up to it.

I could tell there was something he wanted to ask me as we got onto the motorway. He kept glancing over at me and then back at the road, clenching and unclenching his hands on the steering wheel. I ignored it for a while, thinking he would get round to it in his own time. After half an hour had gone by without a word being spoken I decided to open it up.

"What is it, Mark?"

"What do you mean?"

"I can tell there's something you want to talk about. Spit it out." I turned slightly in my seat to look at him.

"Just something I'm curious about." He changed lane and overtook a couple of cars before glancing back at me again. "What did you mean last night? About going to Houston or Chicago after we've been to Florida?"

I pulled a hair elastic off my wrist and tied my hair back; buying myself time to word what had been going through my mind.

"Well, it all depends what happens in Florida. With Sara. If we come out of this OK I'm going to go home for a couple of days. Raw is still in Florida so I'm not needed until we move across to Georgia. If it doesn't… well, in that case I'll take a few days off and go visit my brother in Chicago. Get my head straight. I told Peter that being involved with you would not affect my ability to do my job. If you go back to Sara, damn straight that's going to affect me for a few days. Weeks probably, but once the first few days are out of the way I should be fine."

"I keep telling you, I don't look back."

"OK, I'm not going to argue about it. It's just that, until you can tell me that after you've seen her, I'm going to prepare myself for the worst. I'm a pessimist by nature. That way I'm never disappointed and sometimes pleasantly surprised. I'm not going to put any pressure on you one way or the other. If there's one thing I've learned in the past few years it's that you have to live your own life. None of it affects how I feel or how much I want you. And I think that was shown pretty well before we left the hotel." He had to smile and nod in agreement with that.

In an effort to take the tension out of what I had said I reached out and put a hand on his thigh. He dropped his hand to cover mine and concentrated on the motorway in front of the car.

The rest of the time spent in Europe was really quite enjoyable. The shows went well, the fans loved it and Mark was pretty relaxed, seemingly not having taken our conversation too much to heart. I was quite surprised when that relaxation continued on in New York and as we began to work our way down the east coast. Once we hit South Carolina the week before Summerslam he started to get tense and moody. I just tried to stay as relaxed as possible around him, being there when it seemed like he needed me. I did, however, make sure that I was on my best behaviour, trying not to do anything to annoy him. The few days we had spent in England had shredded my nerves quite enough for such a short space of time.

In one way it seemed to take forever to get to Florida, as we were so busy in those few weeks. Somehow it also seemed to come up so fast as I was still dreading it internally. Finally, however, we were there, in Fort Lauderdale. As for the pay per view back in Houston we were going to be there for a few days. There was a Smackdown to tape and a house show before the Summerslam itself. Mark had to wait for Sara to call him to arrange when they were going to meet. As she hadn't on the first day we were there a fairly large group of us decided to go out to a bar for the night. Mark definitely needed the distraction and so did I.

We weren't planning on going anywhere too exciting so I just pulled on a pair of favourite tight fitting jeans and strappy T-shirt. The top was small enough that the horn of my little unicorn just poked out form under the neckline. It was hard work to keep Mark from trying to follow it down to discover the rest of the creature, at least it was until we met up with everyone else when he started to behave himself a little better.

It was a fairly ordinary looking bar we went into. I couldn't help noticing that there were a few little Irish touches about the place. I have a little Irish blood myself and a great fascination for anything Celtic, hence the armband tattooed around my right bicep.

"Hey, look! They have a live band performing later," Tara said as we went in the door. Sure enough, there was a sign on the door advertising the fact that 'Glory Hawk' would be performing that evening, scheduled to start in about half an hour. Being at the back of our little group meant that I got lumbered with getting the first round of drinks back and a pile of money was passed back along with a list of drinks. Glen volunteered to stay back and help me, along with Tara.

The place was quite busy and we found a space at the bar to wait our turn. I heard a voice behind me. I thought it sounded vaguely familiar but then laughed at myself. I'd never been to Florida and didn't know anyone there. Glen replied to whatever the voice had said.

"I think you made a mistake. We haven't ordered yet"

"If there's one thing I can tell you with all certainty, it's that Jade will never turn down free Guinness. Especially not from me. Isn't that right, sweetness?" I span round, eyes wide.

"Tony? What the hell are you doing here?"

"It's my bar, sweetness. Now get that little butt round here and give me a hug. I haven't seen you for a couple of years!"

I shot round to the gap in the bar and threw myself at Tony. Glen looked at me very strangely. It wasn't surprising. I had walked into a strange bar in a state I had only earlier told everyone that I had never visited and thrown myself at a man, who claimed to own the bar. Tony was quite impressive too, standing at six feet four inches and broad with it. He wouldn't have looked out of place with the others.

Releasing my hold on Tony, I stepped back. "Are you still with…" I clicked my fingers, struggling to find the name.

"Yes, still with Mike. He's just bringing up some bottles."

"I'm glad. You always did make a sweet couple. I knew you'd moved over here, but never heard where. I suppose I'd assumed you'd go back to California. And if you're here, Andy can't be too far away."

"The twin bond can get a bit excessive. Nah, he's here helping to set the band up. You want to give me your drink order? Although you know your money is no good here sweetness." He ruffled my hair like a little kid.

"Get off! Besides, I think we could bankrupt you. I've got a group of thirsty wrestlers waiting for their drinks." I laughed when his eyes lit up.

"Are any of them cute?"

"Yeah, several, and mostly married too. And one of them's mine, so strictly hands off, got it?"

Glen interjected. "Why do you call her sweetness?"

Tony laughed. "Because she isn't. Not even slightly."

He sorted out our drinks and gave us some trays to carry them on. He called out when he saw us heading towards the other room.

"You going to watch the band?"" I glanced back and nodded. "Jade, there's something I need to tell you…"

"Later, Tony. If we don't get these drinks through there, they'll come looking for 'em. I'll come talk later." I turned back to follow Glen and Tara, totally missing the worried look on Tony's face.

I couldn't believe that he was here. I'd known him and his family back in the UK. Irish father, Canadian mother, moved to the UK from California. Huge family with one daughter and six sons. I'd heard that the parents had split up and some of the family had left the country but hadn't heard specific details.

We found the others and distributed the drinks, stacking the trays to one side to use again and settled down to watch the band setting up. I got bored after a little while and started playing with my phone.

"Jade," Mark elbowed me in the ribs to get my attention. "That guy over there has the exact same tattoo as you."

"Which one?" I asked, not looking up from the screen. "My dragon is pretty common."

"No, the unicorn. Right over his back. It looks great."

My head shot up suddenly. "You must be mistaken."

"Look for yourself." He pointed over to the band. A man was standing with his back to us, bending over one of the amps. As he stood up straight I saw his long black hair fall down and partially cover the tattoo that covered most of his back. The same as the one I had on my chest.

It wasn't just Mark's past coming back to haunt me in Florida.


	13. Chapter 13

I froze in my seat, eyes riveted to the broad bare back in front of me. Forcing my eyes away I made some vague comment to Mark and looked towards the door, uncomfortable. I saw Tony come in and make his way across the room to talk to somebody. They both turned and looked around the room and then over at us. It didn't help me when I realised he was speaking to his twin brother, Andy. Both pairs of eyes looked at me and then swung round to the owner of the tattoo. Andy looked back at me and half raised a hand in greeting, dropping it again uncertainly. I saw his head twitch and he faced towards the side. His mouth moved and he pointed in my direction. Then another pair of eyes settled on me.

His head came up and his eyes narrowed. Of course he recognised me. After what I'd done to him he would never forget. I hadn't seen him in seven years, but it looked like neither of us had forgotten.

"Excuse me a second," I said to Mark and squeezed past him. Unfortunately I hadn't got more than two steps away from the table when a voice spoke to my side.

"Well now, I'd never have expected to see you here." I stopped and my head came right up. Taking a deep breath I turned to face the person that had spoken.

"Hey Damian. It's been a long time."

He snorted. "Still seems like yesterday sometimes."

"Seven years."

"I suppose it is. Tell me, how's Ben?"

"Fine last time I saw him." I stared up at the ceiling, feeling very awkward.

"How long you been married now? Oh that's right, seven years. How stupid of me." He grabbed a band out of his pocket and tied his long hair back.

"Actually we got divorced. About seven months ago."

"Oh dear. You can just imagine how sorry I am to hear that." His tone was getting more sarcastic.

"You OK, Jade?" Tara asked from her seat just behind me.

"I'm fine." My fists were slowly clenching and unclenching, the least obvious way I could come up with to release the stress.

"Aren't you going to introduce my to your friends?" he said, turning towards the table.

"If you insist. Guys, this is Damian. His brother owns this bar. Damian, these are a load of the WWE roster." He nodded and looked along the row of faces.

"Which one are you fucking then?" Mark stiffened and started to get to his feet.

"Leave it, Mark. It's just how he is." I faced Damian again and tried my best to be civil. "I see you got the sleeves finished." I pointed to his arms. "And that phoenix looks pretty good." I looked back over my shoulder. "Damian here took me to get my first tattoo."

Damian stepped forward and pulled the neck of my T-shirt lower. "Still got it then. Thought you might have gotten rid of it, considering."

I tilted my head back to look him in the face. "I'd never do that."

Letting go of my top he flicked the silver chain round my neck. "Still wear that too." It was a thick Celtic style chain and the only jewellery I wore other than my signet ring and several earrings.

"I never take it off." He snorted again.

"I can name one day you did." I blinked a couple of times before replying.

"Yeah, I took it off on my wedding day. That's it though."

"I'm guessing you two have history," Tara spoke once more. Damian turned and favoured her with an ironic smile.

"You could say that." He twisted his head towards me. "Feel like telling your friends the story?"

I took a step back. "You know the answer to that." I couldn't help looking him over as I spoke. I hadn't seen him in seven years, but he'd hardly changed at all.

Let me tell you about Damian. He was six feet two inches roughly tall. Long black hair and the brightest green eyes I'd ever seen. Muscular build, with tattoos covering his arms, one large one on his back and now a medium sized one on one side of his chest. He looked pretty aggressive, with both nipples pierced and his navel done twice. Looking at him right then, apart from the body piercing and lack of beard, he looked like a younger black haired version of Mark.

He looked along the table again. "Come on then, which one?"

I looked at Mark and sighed. "Him." Damian looked at Mark and gave him a polite seeming nod.

"Damian?" A hand landed on his shoulder and I looked up gratefully at his big brother.

"Hey Andy." Andy looked at me and just turned slightly away.

"You nearly ready?" he asked his younger brother.

"Not quite yet." He turned back to me and I could see him thinking. It was always easy to tell when Damian was thinking. He had a habit of sticking his tongue out under his canine tooth, hooking his tongue stud between that tooth and the one next to it. I shivered suddenly, remembering other times he had turned that look on me.

"Damian…"

"I've got to go work now." He pointed to the stage and I realised that it must be his band that was playing. He'd always been a fantastic singer. "We'll talk afterwards." He turned away and headed to the stage. I returned to my seat next to Mark, who regarded me steadily as I settled myself back down.

"Feel like filling me in?" he asked after a few seconds.

"We, er, used to live together. Back before I got married."

"And?" Tara pressed, leaning forward across the table.

"And I left him to marry Ben." I examined my hands as they lay in my lap. Tara opened her eyes wide.

"You left _that_ to marry your ex-husband? Were you mad?" She sounded incredulous.

Oh yes, there was a world of difference between Ben and Damian. Ben was the safe respectable choice. The one you, or at least I, married. Damian was danger, excitement, never knowing what was going to happen next. The six months we had been together had been explosive in more ways than one.

"Probably. If I'd stayed with him though there would have been no guarantee of us both surviving." I looked up as an empty glass was picked up from in front of me.

"Sometimes we wondered, sweetness. Sometimes we wondered," Tony said, setting the tray down on the table. "Are you all right?"

"I didn't know he would have held the grudge for so long." I kind of forgot about everyone else around us as I gazed up at Tony, lost in memories.

"He wouldn't have done if you'd just left. It was when you came back that broke him."

"I know I never should have done it. It was like I was addicted to him, Tony. I just had to see him one last time."

"But why that night of all nights? He thought you'd changed your mind, that you'd chosen him."

"Good girls don't choose someone like Damian, Tony," I sighed.

"Sweetness, when were you a good girl? Especially then/ Besides, he could have done with a good girl. Calmed him down a little. But he's been wild ever since." He crouched down slightly to reach my level. "I think he's a lost cause now, sweetness."

"You can't blame that on me." I looked up at him, eyes wide. "It nearly killed me to leave that last day."

"But you left. Got out of his bed and went and got married. I've got work to do, sweetness." He stood up, picked up the tray and left.

"Did I just hear that right?" Tara's eyes were wide. I could feel Mark's eyes on me as well. I heaved a deep sigh, pulling myself from the thoughts of the past.

"I'm not proud of what happened."

"Explain," Tara prompted.

"OK, OK. I'll have to start at the beginning." I glanced at Mark out of the corner of my eye, taking in his utter stillness. "I never said I came without a past. Just not a deep dark secret one."

"Go on," he said quietly.

"Well, I was sixteen when I met Ben. He was great first love material. Kind, patient, considerate. We were together for six years. Then we both got itchy feet. He was worse than me and dumped me. For a couple of months I just played around. Damian was usually around, one of a circle of friends. We always fought whenever we were together. One night our friends got sick of it and decided to lock us in a room together so we could fight without annoying anybody else." I smiled ironically at the memory.

"We argued for hours it felt like. Standing toe-to-toe screaming at each other. Then without realising it we were kissing. And then more. Three days later I moved in with him."

"Wow, that was quick," Tara observed.

"Yeah, I guess it was. We still fought all the time but now the making up was great. After a couple of weeks he took me to get a tattoo. A smaller version of the one he had designed for himself. He was like a drug. I just couldn't get enough of him. About five months later Ben turned up at my work to talk to me. Said he'd been doing a lot of thinking and realised he'd made a mistake. That he wanted to marry me. It kind of threw me so I went home to talk to my mother about it. She'd never liked Damian and persuaded me that Ben would be the far better choice. So I moved out and back home." I pushed my hair back from my face.

"Then what happened?" Tara prompted.

"It was seven months before Ben and I married. I avoided Damian for that whole time. I just knew that, if I saw him again, I'd do something 'stupid' like throwing away the good man I was marrying and going back to the danger zone. Then suddenly it was the night before my wedding. I felt restless, couldn't settle to anything and didn't know why. For some reason I got it into my head that I had to go and make things right with him, try to explain why I'd done what I had."

"Go on." Mark's eyes had narrowed and I had a feeling he had already worked out what had happened next.

"Here's the bit that I'm not proud of. When I saw him, when he opened his door… It was like the seven months before just hadn't happened. We just kind of fell on each other. I fell asleep afterwards and when I woke up it was morning. I had just a few hours to go. So I got up and left him again. That's the first time I've spoken to him since."

"Wow," Tara said, leaning back in her seat and looking at me with an amazed expression.

"This is his band it would seem. Should be a good show at least. He was always a great singer. Rock covers mostly, Guns N'Roses and that kind of thing. If you could get him in the right mood though he'd sing a version of Unchained Melody that would make you weak at the knees." I smiled faintly at the memories. Just at that moment the band started up. Nickleback, How you Remind Me. It was loud enough to stop any chance at conversation.

He'd stuck with what he was good at. It was mostly older rock stuff, the kind of stuff he had sung when I'd known him before. I'd seen him perform so many times with the band he'd been in when he was in the UK. He'd put on an open white shirt to perform, contrasting strongly with his tanned and inked skin and black hair, which was loose once more. My eyes couldn't seem to leave him as he sang. Then he started on Every Rose Has It's Thorn and it was as if he was singing directly to me, eyes never moving from mine.

There was one song I had been praying wouldn't be in this set. As each song went by and it didn't come I relaxed a little more. Eventually it seemed like the band had reached the end of the set. I managed to wrench my gaze away from him and look at the stage as a whole. Damian stepped back from the mike and spoke to each member of the band in turn and then approached the front of the stage.

"That should have been the last song but I hope you'll allow us one more. We've never performed this one live and it might be a little rough around the edges." He stepped back and nodded to the guitarist who began to pick out the introduction. As soon as I heard the first few notes my head came up again, sharply enough to get Mark's attention.

"What's wrong?"

"I can't believe he's going to sing this." I shook my head and looked back at the stage, straight into Damian's eyes.

_Talk to me softly  
There's something in your eyes  
Don't hang your head in sorrow  
And please don't cry  
I know how you feel inside I've  
I've been there before  
Somethin's changin' inside you  
And don't you know_

I started to mouth the words along with him, feeling myself being taken back through the years. It was a relief when he closed his eyes as he got into the performance.

_Don't you cry tonight  
I still love you baby  
Don't you cry tonight  
Don't you cry tonight  
There's a heaven above you baby  
And don't you cry tonight  
_  
He opened his eyes again before beginning the next verse. I knew the song word for word and that this coming up was the bit he meant for me.

_Give me a whisper  
And give me a sigh  
Give me a kiss before you  
tell me goodbye  
Don't you take it so hard now  
And please don't take it so bad  
I'll still be thinkin' of you  
And the times we had...baby  
_  
I knew that the last few lines weren't meant to comfort. He had a short fuse and a long memory. I hadn't realised that his memory was quite this long.

_And don't you cry tonight  
Don't you cry tonight  
Don't you cry tonight  
There's a heaven above you baby  
And don't you cry tonight_

_And please remember that I never lied  
And please remember  
how I felt inside now honey  
You gotta make it your own way  
But you'll be alright now sugar  
You'll feel better tomorrow  
Come the morning light now baby_

I didn't really hear the rest of the song. It wasn't only the words of the song that got to me. Damian had always liked to have music playing when we were in bed. A habit he had always joked came from sneaking girlfriends into his parent's house when he had lived there, knowing that they most definitely wouldn't have approved. That had been the song playing the last time we had been together. I hadn't thought about it until he started to sing but as soon as the first words had come out of his mouth it had come back to me with crystal clarity.

"You want to leave?" Mark asked as the noise faded away.

I shook my head. "He said he wanted to talk to me."

"You don't need to talk to him," he growled.

"Yes, I do. I owe him that much at least. I did something really crappy to him, used him. The least I can do is talk to him if he wants to." I glanced back to the stage and saw Damian step down and go through to the bar.

"Look, he's leaving anyway," Mark observed.

I gave him a small, tight smile. "No, he's not. He's going to get his bottle. He's always the same after he's performed. He'll come back in here, take his shirt off and take a hit from the bottle. Then he'll call me over."

"You know him well then." It was a quiet, dangerous sounding tone of voice.

"Yep, I do. I can even tell you now the first thing he'll probably say to me."

"I don't want you to talk to him."

I screwed my eyes shut and bit my bottom lip. "You know what, Mark? I don't want you to see Sara, but is that going to stop you? Don't go dog in the manger on me. This is something I feel I have to do. I did something bad and I need to make amends for it. Here he comes."

In different circumstances it probably would have made me smile as I watched Damian walk back into the room, strip off his shirt and throw it into a corner and take a drink from the bottle in his hand. He turned to see me watching and extended an arm, twitching his index finger to summon me to him. I edged past Mark who sat in stony silence and walked over to Damian. He was only at the next table.

He couldn't keep back a slight grin when I mouthed his words along with him.

"Wanna go fuck?"

"You don't change. Not available." I sat on the chair next to him, arms folded over my chest.

"Didn't stop you before."

"OK, I deserved that. This is different though."

He gave me a frankly curious look. "Why?"

I glanced over at Mark. "This time I know what I want."

"Yeah?" He put the bottle down and turned my face towards him with a finger. "Sure about that?"

I lifted my chin slightly, breaking the contact. "Don't play with me Damian. I'm not who I was seven years ago." I picked up his bottle from the table and took a hefty hit from it, dropping my head back and letting the fiery whiskey burn a trail down my throat.

"When I start playing with you you'll drop at my feet. You always did." He took the bottle back out of my hand, tipping it up into his mouth. Much of the anger seemed to have left him, leaving him calmer and less likely to blow up. It was still a distinct possibility though. He had a fiery temper and an unpredictable nature.

"I'm not playing any more. Like I said, strictly not available." This time he handed the Jack over willingly for me to drink. We sat in silence for a few seconds.

"Did you ever regret it?" he asked suddenly. "Leaving me?" He reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out a battered pack of Marlboros. Lighting two he handed one to me. Accepting it gratefully I took a long drag and savoured the smoke.

"Yes. All the time."

He leaned forward, elbows on his knees. "Why do it then?"

"I thought I was making the sensible choice. Ben was a good guy, is a good guy. I just realised too late that he wasn't the guy for me." I shrugged. "By that time it was too late. I'd been warned off trying to see you."

His eyes swung sharply towards me. "Who did that?"

I pointed the bottle across the room to where Andy was talking to Tony. Both men kept looking at us and then away, trying to gauge the situation. "Andy made it perfectly clear I was to stay away. Tony was a little more understanding. He and I had always talked, especially before he came out."

"Yes, sweetness," Damian said with a little twist to his mouth. He looked at Mark and then back at me. "So that's your man now then, huh?"

"Uh-huh."

"How's that work? With you in the UK?"

"I'm not in the UK any more. Based in Texas now, but my job has me travelling all over with these guys." I jerked a thumb towards the other table.

"Don't look too friendly, does he? How do you find those big ol' dumb Texans anyway?"

"There's three big Texans at that table right now. I might have a chance at stopping one of them from beating the crap out of you but not the other two." I shook a finger under his nose.

Damian sat back up and looked at me appraisingly. "Can he keep up with you?" I cocked my head to the side, missing his meaning. "You were always a wildcat. I don't think I was ever without some kind of mark. Look, you left me a couple of scars. He lifted the arm nearest me and showed me a faint white scar down the back of his ribs. It looked like a scratch mark.

"None of your damn business."

"That would be a no then." He gave me a blast of those green eyes, challenging me to fight back. The tip of his tongue poked out under his eyetooth, tapping the metal stud against it.

"Like I said, none of your damn business." It had never taken much for him to set me off and right at that moment I felt unsure of myself. That was always guaranteed to make me snappy.

"Easy, easy. Just wondered how he compared." I knew he was trying to wind me up and, sadly, it was working. I felt my shoulders rise and it was as if there were sparks of electricity in the air around us. It felt like old times.

I felt someone walk behind me and heard Tony's voice at the next table over.

"Any one of you that reckons they can get a hold of Jade should probably get her out of there now. Otherwise it won't be pretty."

I turned my full attention back to Damian. "There is no comparison."

"That doesn't answer my question, love." He raised an eyebrow at me, daring me to go on. I just opened my mouth to reply when I felt a hand drop onto my shoulder. It moved on down between my breasts in an undeniably possessive action.

"Come on Jade. We're going back to the hotel." I stiffened slightly, resenting the implication of ownership, before forcing myself to relax again. I tipped my head back to look up at Mark.

"I'll be there in just a minute." I saw his jaw tighten as he turned away.

"Jealous type, is he?" Damian asked, having watched the exchange between us.

"Very. Look, Damian, I'm here for less than a week. Don't make being here any shittier that it already is for me."

Anger flashed across his face. "Don't make a week shittier for you? You got any idea what you put me through?" He stood suddenly, looming over me. "I loved you, although God alone knows why. And you were a scheming manipulative bitch."

"Wait just a damn minute," I shouted, getting to my feet as well. "I hate what I did but none of it was deliberate. If I had the choice again I never would have left." I opened my mouth to speak again but never got to say what I had been going to. He grabbed me and his mouth came down over mine as he kissed me fiercely, putting all of his anger into it. For a few moments I went along with it before realising what I was doing and pulling back, pushing at his chest. We stood inches apart, breathing heavily, glaring at each other. He raised that eyebrow at me again cockily and I did the first thing that came to mind. I pulled my arm back and punched him as hard as I could before turning and walking quickly out to the bar where the others were waiting.

"Not the best idea, sweetness," Tony said as I passed him. I glanced back over my shoulder to see Damian wiping blood from a split lip. He saw me look back and raised his head, pointing a finger towards me.

"This ain't over," he mouthed.

"You OK?" Tara asked as I stepped through to the bar. You've got blood on your hand." Mark swung round at her words, taking a step towards me.

"Not mine," I said, looking down at the back of my hand.

"Just like old times, sweetness," Tony came over and gave me a hug, ignoring the glowering presence of Mark. "Get along with these cuties out of the way. He'll calm down and it'll all be forgotten."

"Yeah, right." I shut my mouth as Damian came through from the other room. He walked past, back of his hand still to his lip. Turning just before he reached the door, he made one last comment.

"I'll be seeing you, Jade. Make no mistake about it. We've still got things to talk about." Nodding to Tony, he left.

Shortly after, we took our leave as well. I promised Tony that I would come back and see him when I had some free time, to catch up.

Mark was quiet on the way back to the hotel. To be honest I was glad of the time to gather myself together. My nerves were stretched so tight that one wrong word would have had me biting his head off, and that was never a bright idea. The silence was almost deafening until we reached the hotel.

I was supposed to be sharing with Tara, but this thing with her and Gregory Helms had developed into an ongoing thing and rooms had been shuffled around so she was in with him. Somehow or other that had left me with a room to myself. Mark followed me in and shut the door firmly behind him.

"You want to tell me what the hell that was all about?" He was really angry. It showed in the very quiet tone of voice and utter stillness of his body as he stood in front of me.

"I told you the story," I snapped, moving to step past him. He caught my arm, preventing me from walking away.

"There's more to it than that. Why did you hit him?"

I shook his hand from my arm. "He said something I didn't like."

The look he gave me was more like something he would give an opponent in the ring than he would usually give me. I could tell that Damian had got to him.

"Like what?" he growled. I know I say he did that a lot. With his accent that was how a lot of what he said came out. This was a real low growl though. If I hadn't known him, and been so keyed up from what had happened it probably would have really unnerved me.

I shot him a smirk. "He wanted to know if you could keep up with me. Seemed to doubt it."

Mark's eyebrows shot up towards his hairline. "Had no problems so far."

"Hmm, you haven't. Care to try the real me though?" His eyes narrowed as he stared at me.

"Just what the hell is that supposed to mean?"

I sat on the end of the bed and kicked my boots off. "You know what? I think I've been so caught up in who you are I've kind of forgotten who I am. These whole three months this thing has been going on has been about you."

"Wait…" He tried to interrupt me but I was in full flow.

"You know, I think seeing Damian again has been good for me. It's given me the little part of myself back that I haven't seen for a very long time." I stood up from the bed. "All that remains to be seen is whether or not you like it." I moved to in front of him, hands on hips. "Whaddya think big guy? Want to try me?"

Mark drew himself up to his full height. "You think you can take all I've got to give?" I gave him a short curt nod.

What followed was almost brutally intense. Most of the buttons on his shirt were ripped off and my jeans were torn beyond saving as we frantically pulled at each other's clothes. It was like a fight for dominance as we both totally let ourselves go for the very first time, nipping, biting and scratching anything within reach. At times blood was drawn although never badly.

I think we went round every possible surface in the room in the hours that followed. After each time we'd rest for a while before one of us would do or say something that sparked it up all over again.

The last time of the night was played out on the bed. I had been on top, his hands digging into my hips as we moved frantically together before he pulled me down to his chest and rolled, putting me underneath him, legs wrapped high around his body. That most rare of things happened on that occasion as we both came together. A guttural noise was forced from my throat, rising steadily in pitch until it became a kind of keening cry that petered out as he stopped moving. He leant down over me, resting his head on the pillow beside mine and muttered something.

I lay there for a few seconds as what he had said filtered through my brain. When I understood it I pushed frantically at him until he rolled to the side, frowning at me in confusion. As soon as I was free of him I leapt off the bed, grabbing the first item of clothing that came to hand – his shirt. Wrapping it around me I ran to the door, ignoring the fact that he called out to me, asking what was wrong.

Once outside the room I ran into the elevator. Going up a couple of floors I ran down the corridor and pounded on another hotel room door. It took a while for there to be any movement inside so I beat on the door again. Eventually the door opened and I ran straight past the person inside.

"Jade, it's five o clock in the morning," Dave grumbled. "What the hell is it?" He turned and looked at me then, and saw the state I was in, torn shirt wrapped around me, tears streaming down my face. "What is it? What's the matter?"

I just stood in the middle of his room, letting the tears fall. "Dave… He called me Sara."


	14. Chapter 14

A/N - the speed of delivery of this chapter is owed entirely to Aslan and DreamingEgypt. I told you I was open to bribery! (Just keep it coming!)

Dave stood there stunned for a moment before looking me up and down. "While you were…?" I nodded. "Oh baby!" He took hold of my hand. "Come with me." He led me into the bathroom and set the shower running. "Get cleaned up. I'll lend you a shirt and then we'll talk."

I showered on automatic pilot. The tears stopped as I stood under the hot water, wincing every now and again as the aches showed where I was going to have bruises. Stepping out of the stall I wrapped myself in a towel. A slight smile came over my face when I saw a huge T-shirt and pair of boxers folded on the edge of the washbasin and I pulled them on quickly.

Dave was sat on the end of his bed, wiping the sleep from his eyes when I came out again. He glanced up at me and patted the bed next to him, unable to hold in a massive yawn.

"Told you that you'd regret saying that," I mumbled, sitting where he had indicated. He didn't reply at first, just wrapped a huge arm round my shoulders.

"Tell me what happened," he said after a few seconds. "Did you have a fight?"

"Kind of. But we were past that. We were… and then… he just…" I couldn't get the words out any sense and just huddled into his warmth, hoping to stop the shivering.

After a few more useless attempts to get me to talk, he stood up and manoeuvred me around until I was actually in the bed. When I wouldn't let go of his arm, he sighed and settled himself next to me.

"Try to get some sleep," he said quietly, rubbing my arm.

I didn't think it would be possible for me to sleep but I must have done as I woke to him shaking me gently.

"Wake up. You should go get some clothes." I sat up suddenly, shaking my head. "You want me to go get you some?"

"Please. I don't think I can face him, not for a while at least."

It was a shame that I was so caught up in my own thoughts. I currently had the World Heavyweight champion trotting down to my hotel room to pick me up some clean clothes. In other circumstances I would have been pretty smug about it. But then in other circumstances it wouldn't have been happening anyway.

I took the bag he handed me when he came back in and went into the bathroom to change. I came back out dressed to find him again sitting on the end of the bed, waiting for me.

"He must have still been there, then," I said, sitting down next to Dave.

"Hmm. Not too amused to see me either, especially when I told him where you'd gone. He was all for coming up here to talk to you." I sat up straight, eyes wide. "Don't worry, I talked him out of it. I got your key off him as well. Come on, I want some breakfast."

"I'm not going." I shook my head at him.

"Yes, you are." I shook my head again, making a dissenting noise in my throat. "You don't have any choice. You've got hold of my arm and I'm going to breakfast."

A short argument followed, but I gave in in the end. Strangely enough, I was hungry which was very unusual for me in the mornings.

It was still quite early when we got down to the restaurant for breakfast and no one else much was in evidence. I sat in a corner with Dave as a buffer between the world and me and attacked a large stack of pancakes with syrup and several mugs of very strong coffee. Dave eyed me with some amusement.

"I thought women went off their food when they were unhappy?"

I ate the last mouthful of my pancakes and looked up at him. "Two words for you. Comfort eating."

"Finally!" he laughed. "She smiles." The restaurant door opened and he glanced up, the grin fading from his face. "Heads up. Here he comes."

I resisted the automatic urge to raise my eyes, concentrating instead on the contents of my coffee mug. It was almost as if I could feel his presence approaching the table and I peeked out of the corner of my eye, seeing his legs stop by Dave.

"You mind letting me talk to Jade now?" I put a hand on Dave's arm, giving him a slight shake of my head. He picked my hand off his arm and turned to face me.

"I'll only be at the next table. You need to sort this out." I recognised the sense in what he said although it didn't make me any more enthusiastic about the idea. Mark sat himself down opposite me and just watched me for a few moments before speaking.

"You want to tell me what made you high tail off to his room," he jerked a thumb over his shoulder to where Dave was now sat, "and not come back?"

I stared at him, incredulous. "You're trying to tell me you have no idea what you did?"

"What I did? I don't understand, Jade." I looked at him, trying to gauge if he was telling the truth. He did look genuinely puzzled.

"Mark, you called me Sara." His eyes widened. "Right at the end of one of the most intense sexual experiences I have ever had, you called me by your ex-wife's name."

"I didn't realise…" He trailed off.

"I don't know if I can do this any more." I looked down at the table as treacherous tears filled my eyes. "I love you, but that was just a killer."

"Jade, just wait a minute," he said as I got to my feet. "Damn it." He plucked his cell phone out of his pocket and glanced at the screen before looking back at me. "It's Sara," he said quietly.

"Well then I guess you'd better answer it," I said, walking past him and out of the restaurant. Once outside I leant against the wall, raising my eyes skywards and trying not to cry.

Summerslam was the first major pay per view event since I had passed my probationary period and I knew I would most likelybe a lot more involved than I had been in the past. There were more autograph sessions and interviews in the run up to the really big events than at any other time. I'd got quite used to running the sessions now and had even had to do a couple on my own. There hadn't been so much in the way of going to interviews in the past as Karen preferred to do that herself as much as possible but it was likely that there would be extra stuff thrown my way to help with. That in mind I grabbed a lift to the arena, using the excuse that Mark wasn't needed yet and I was leaving him the rental to use later on.

"Hi Jade," Karen said brightly when I walked into the office. "Ready for your first bout of PPV mayhem?"

"Sure," I said, trying to match her lively tone.

"Are you OK? You look a little pale."

"Yeah, fine. Just didn't get much sleep last night." I bent over the lists on the desk in front of her.

"Don't think I would either," she joked.

"Karen, you have no idea." I rolled my eyes at her and seemed to have pulled the little piece of innuendo off as she laughed.

"OK, to business then. We've got three titles on the line at Summerslam. Heavyweight, Intercontinental and Tag. The champions and challengers for all three of those titles have pretty full schedules for all days leading up to the event. The timetables have worked quite nicely so that three of us can cope, taking two each. I'm guessing I know one talent that you'll take?"

"I'd rather not have Taker if that's what you mean." She gave me a questioning look, making me think fast. "I'd still like to keep as much distance as possible between personal and professional life."

She nodded. "Very sensible. Amanda, will you have Taker then?" The other woman looked a bit nervous.

"Ah, it didn't go well last time I had him. I'd rather have someone else."

Karen rolled her eyes. "Yes, I remember now. Still, the company paid for the doors to be fixed." She saw my surprised look. "Amanda finds Taker rather difficult. Absolutely terrified of him."

"I can understand that. I used to be the same way. I'll have Taker if I have to but like I said I'd rather not." I hoped beyond measure that I wouldn't have to.

"No, that's fine. Tell you what, Amanda you can take MNM and Chris Jericho, I'll take the Undertaker and Shelton Benjamin so that leaves you with Batista, Kane and Big Show, Jade. Here are your timetables."

I took the sheets she handed me. "Hey, I've got a free morning."

Karen smiled. "Make the most of it. There won't be much of it until after Summerslam now."

I decided to head to catering to sort out my diary over a coffee. I had just settled at a table, papers spread out and diary open in front of me when Annie stopped right by me.

"So, the golden girl isn't so golden after all." I looked up at her, completely lost. "I overheard you last night, talking about that singer. Wouldn't have thought you were pretty enough to be his type, but then I've always thought that about Taker anyway. I expect you're just grateful for whatever you can get though, aren't you?" She flashed me a malicious smile and waited for me to respond.

"Annie, I really don't have the patience or inclination for this. What is your problem with me?" I dropped my pen and rocked back in my chair.

"He's too good for you. Way out of your league," she hissed.

"Well then, why don't you just try and see how far you get? Anything to get you to shut up and leave me the hell alone!" I picked up my pen again. "Now, if you don't mind, I have work to do."

"Maybe I _will_ just try then." She gave me a mocking glance and strode away, swaying her hips as she went. I couldn't help clenching my fist and bringing it down on the table.

The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end as the door into catering swung open behind me once more. I didn't need to look round to see who was there. It was like I could sense him from some distance away. It was confirmed when Annie stood from her table and started in that direction, a broad grin on her face.

"Hi Mark," she purred. "How about we go out for a drink sometime. Get to know each other a little better?" I turned a little in my seat to watch the exchange and saw her put a hand on his arm, leaning into him slightly. Mark tipped his head in her direction, frowning.

"How about we don't?" He shook her hand off and made to approach me but was stopped by her hand on his arm again.

"I'm sure I could make it fun for you." She gave a throaty little giggle. I gathered my papers together, having no wish to watch the little show Annie was trying to put on for me.

"I don't think so," Mark stated flatly. "Why don't you just get the hell out of my way? I have to talk to Jade." My eyes met his as Annie flounced away, muttering to herself.

"I don't know how much there is to say." I fixed my eyes on the table. "What did Sara want?" Curiosity got the better of me.

"She's coming to Summerslam. After the show, we're going to meet up and talk about whatever it is she wants."

I nodded slowly. "In that case, I think it would be better if I didn't see you between now and then. I can't take any more of this, Mark. I'd be afraid you were going to call me by her name every time we had sex. I feel like I've already lost you to her."

Mark shook his head slowly. "I didn't mean to do it. I don't remember it. We're good together. Don't ruin it."

I picked my papers up and got to my feet. "Until you can come to me after Summerslam and tell me you want me and only me that's it. If you can do that in a week's time then we can talk some more. I have to go get ready for this afternoon's session."

I stayed true to my intention and stayed clear of everyone for the next couple of days, only leaving my hotel room to go to the sessions and interviews as scheduled. All of my food was ordered from room service. By the third day, house show day, I was getting restless and decided to go back to visit Tony as a distraction after I had finished carting the tag team champs from pillar to post.

The bar was quiet when I got there and Tony was behind the counter.

"Hey, sweetness," he called as I walked in the door. "What can I get you?" I leaned back a little and scanned the length of the bar. "I know that look," he said, grabbing a shot glass and parking a Jack in front of me.

"Thanks," I said, reaching into the pocket of my jeans for some money.

"I told you last time, your money is no good here. You look tired."

I threw the shot back and grimaced. "Been busy. You know how it is."

"Hmm, I know you, sweetness. What's ailing you?" He leaned over the bar on his elbows. "Tell uncle Tony everything. Is it man troubles? One of those little hotties you work with causing you problems?"

I gave an ironic little laugh. "Perceptive as always. Yep, man trouble it is."

"Nothing to do with Damian?"

"Not really. It all kicked off after that, but he had nothing to do with it really."

"Yeah, 'cos I'd hate to have caused you trouble." A sarcastic voice came from the doorway into the other room.

I span on my seat towards the door. "Great! My day gets worse."

"Oh Jade! It's great to see you again too." Damian walked over and sat himself on the stool next to me. "What's the man trouble then? Find out he couldn't satisfy you after all?"

"Damian!" Tony shot out angrily. I raised a hand to settle him and tossed my hair to the far side of my neck, exposing a fading bite mark left from that last night where my neck joined my shoulder.

"No problems there. Nah, we're kind of apart at the moment, for other reasons." Tony raised an eyebrow questioningly. I shot a glance at Damian and then sighed. "I think his ex-wife is trying to muscle back on the scene. It's just caused a few rows."

"He didn't care about you and me sucking face then?" Damian quipped.

"The only reason you're still able to walk is that I didn't tell him. I told you he gets jealous." I smiled my thanks at Tony as he put another drink in front of me.

"Keeping secrets from him? That doesn't sound good."

"Damian, it wasn't important enough to tell him. Besides, I'd lose my job if he ended up being arrested for beating the crap out of you." Damian bristled at the implication. I sighed deeply. "He's a professional wrestler, probably the best known in the business currently. He's big, strong and can move incredibly quickly for his size. You wouldn't stand a chance."

"She's right, you know," Tony mused. "And I bet he's cute when he's angry."

I looked at Damian's scowl and burst out laughing. "Aw Tony, don't try and do camp. It really doesn't suit you. And I'm not sure cute is a word I would ever use to describe Mark."

"Hmm, maybe not," he agreed. "Tell you what, what are you doing tonight?"

"Er, there's a house show tonight so I'll probably be at the arena until half nine, ten o clock, something like that. After that I'll just go back to the hotel." I picked up my glass that seemed to have refilled itself. Tony plucked it out of my hand.

"If you have work to do then I think you've had enough for now. After the show, get your best gear on and me and Mike will take you out somewhere fun."

"I dunno, Tony…" I trailed off as he mock frowned at me.

"Not optional, sweetness. Give me the name of your hotel and we'll be there to pick you up just after ten. Bring a friend if you like."

I considered the idea and then nodded. "OK, but it'd be easier if you pick me up from the arena. I can just get changed before I go there." I checked my watch. "I'd better get going if I'm going to do that. I'll see you later." Nodding quickly to Damian I left the bar and headed back to the hotel.

A night out with a couple of easy going friends seemed like a great idea, especially the more I thought about it. I got back to the hotel and showered quickly before finding something to wear. I dressed with great care. Just because I was going out with a couple of gay men didn't mean I couldn't make an effort for them. I settled for what was now my favourite short black suede skirt with a tight strappy top and knee length high-heeled suede boots.

I caught a lift to the arena with a car full of Divas. Luckily Annie wasn't amongst them as I still wasn't in the mood to deal with her. A few eyebrows rose at the way I was dressed but then that was to be expected. My normal mode of dress when at the arena was a pair of jeans and T-shirt. Once we got to the arena I went to find Tara.

"What's with you all dressed up?" she asked when she saw me.

"I'm going out after the show. With Tony, the guy that owns that bar."

She looked me up and down. "Very good friends, are we?"

"Tara, his boyfriend is coming with us. Do you fancy it? They're good fun."

She shook her head. "Got other plans."

"Oh, OK. Getting pretty full on, isn't it?" She smiled. It was good to see her happy again after the stress of dealing with Jerry. "I guess I'll just go watch the show then."

It was a pretty lively show. As per usual when the Undertaker had a big match there were the mind games being played with Batista. Both men had great acting abilities and sold it really well. It ended with them standing nose to nose in the ring, supposedly trying to stare each other down. The lights went out suddenly and when they came back up, Taker had disappeared, leaving Batista staring wild-eyed around the ring. Of course I knew all the tricks behind it now, but it still made great viewing. I got so caught up in it that at first I didn't notice Mark emerge from a door slightly up the corridor. I only became aware of him when he stopped in front of me.

"Hi," I said quietly, looking up at him.

"You OK?"

"Much as I can be." I closed my eyes and dropped my head back. "That's a total lie but I will be. I miss you though."

"Jade…"

"I have to go," I said, standing up.

"Going somewhere?" he asked, taking in what I was wearing.

"Yes. Tony who owns the bar we went to the other night offered to take me out, get me out of my hotel room for a while." I saw something flash in his eyes as I spoke, a spark of some emotion that I couldn't interpret. "Luckily I like his boyfriend too." He managed a slight smile. "I really do have to go and meet them. I'll see you around." I turned and walked quickly away, afraid that if I didn't do it right then I would be incapable of doing it at all.

My hopes of a quiet relaxed evening with Tony and Mike were shattered as soon as I got outside the arena. Rather than there being two men waiting for me, there were three, the third of whom did nothing good for my blood pressure.

"Damian insisted on coming as well," Tony informed me with an apologetic little shrug. I gave him and Mike a hug, muttering to them not to worry about it.

"What, I don't get a hug?" Damian complained.

"You want me to split the other side of your lip?" I shot back.

"You know, if I shut my eyes, I could swear we'd gone back about seven or eight years," Tony observed with a grin. "Come on, sweetness, let's go have some fun."

I did actually find myself having fun after a while. There were a couple of minor spats with Damian but then Tony and Mike made us sit one either side of them and the noise level in the club we went to meant that all hostilities had to cease. I did have to admit that Damian was looking hot though. He was wearing a white shirt made of some soft material and open most of the way down his chest, and a pair of black jeans. The guy could just fill a pair of jeans in the most amazing way.

Back when we had both been in the UK Tony had been a very good friend. I had been one of the first people he had told about being gay, coming just behind Mike, obviously enough, and his twin brother Andy. In return I had always been able to tell him all of my problems. I had thought that situation might change when the thing happened with Damian, especially the last night, but Tony had somehow managed to understand. I felt totally comfortable with him and so was able to relax and have a few drinks, safe in the knowledge that nothing untoward was going to happen. Unless I was exceptionally stupid. That was always a possibility.

I felt a tap on my shoulder. "Come and dance with me." I raised my eyes to see Damian leaning over the back of my seat. I pulled a face and made a dismissive hand gesture. "Come on," he said, moving round to the front of me and pulling me to my feet. He had drunk quite a bit too, which probably explained why he was being agreeable. 'What the hell,' I thought and allowed him to pull me onto the dance floor.

Dancing with Damian could be best described as like having sex in a public place, upright and with all your clothes on. He was incredibly musically talented, playing two or three instruments as well as singing, and so had an amazing sense of rhythm. Couple that with a complete disregard for what anyone else thought of what he did and it could lead to some interesting performances. I was pretty fit but he still wore me out enough to be glad when some slow stuff came on.

I was enjoying myself but was definitely aware that something didn't feel right to me. There was just something wrong in where I was although I couldn't really put my finger on it. I made to step back but Damian wrapped his arms round me and pulled me in tight against him, resting my head against his shoulder. I sighed and gave up trying to work out the elusive fact that was evading me, leaning in against him as we moved to the music.

"Come on, sweetness. Time to get you back before you turn into a pumpkin." I opened my eyes to see Tony looking at me over Damian's shoulder. I glanced up at the man I was dancing with and pulled myself free, stumbling back a couple of steps as the thing that was wrong blazed through my brain. It was the wrong man.

I think that it was at that point more than ever that I really comprehended, even through the alcohol-induced haze, what was going on. I didn't want to give Mark up but I had no choice except to wait. It would be his decision now.

Tony must have seen the look on my face as he got hold of my arm quickly. "Definitely time to get you back, little one." He was worrying about me. He only ever called me little one when he thought I was really down or upset.

I had to sit next to Damian in the rear of the car on the way back to the hotel. I was pretty much as far away from him as I could be, staring out of the side window at the streetlights going past.

"Pretty hung up on him, aren't you?" he observed after a while. I glanced up at the rear view mirror and saw Tony watching me.

"Pretty much," I replied.

"So, what is it about the big, rich, famous Undertaker that you like?" He was trying to needle me again. It kind of worked.

"Damian, I couldn't give a flying fuck about the Undertaker. I had trouble separating the two in the past, right back at the very beginning but it isn't the Undertaker I've spent time with, travelled with, shared my bed with. He doesn't begin and end with the character he plays on TV. He has a name and that is what I've called him by from the start, between the two of us at least."

"Sweetness?" Tony's voice came back from the front of the car. "Do you love him?"

I looked at Damian before I answered. "Like I've never loved anyone before."

"Then why don't you fight for him?"

"I've been fighting since the beginning. But I can't fight him. He has to decide what he wants. If he wants me, I'll be there. If not…" I trailed off for a moment. "If not, then I wish him every happiness in his life."

"Oh, little one!" Tony sighed. "You have got it bad."


	15. Chapter 15

The following afternoon all of the competitors for Summerslam had to be at a press conference in a specially set up room at the arena. It meant a slightly easier day for us mugs that had to run around after them – all we had to do was get them to the right room at the right time. So of course that explained why, with less than five minutes to go, I was running around like a headless chicken trying to find Glen and Dave, who seemed to have disappeared off of the face of the earth.

"Haven't you got them yet?" Karen asked urgently as I ran past her in the hallway.

"I swear, I left them in catering twenty minutes ago and told them not to move! I've been everywhere except the parking garage I think." I stopped to draw breath, shaking my head ruefully. "You know something? This was never on the job description".

Karen laughed. "I've just got to get Taker up here and I'm done. Much easier when you handle the old pros."

I flapped a hand at her. "The smugness is painful. Aha!" As I looked up the corridor past Karen Glen came round the corner. "One down, one to go." Mark stepped round the corner right behind Glen. "Right, I'd better go track the last one down." I turned on my heel before I could catch his eye and shot off down the corridor for one last check in Dave's locker room. This time he was there, just putting on his jacket.

"Whoa, where's the fire?" he laughed as I virtually skidded in the door and leant on the wall, breathing heavily.

"Asshole! Come on, before you get me fired."

"So, how does the champ look?" he asked, cocking his head to one side.

"Hot as always. Now I've flattered you can we please get to the press conference?"

"Ah, come on. They can't start without me, can they?" He smiled and hefted the championship belt on his shoulder.

"No, but I doubt the fact of you being late would be taken out on you. It would most definitely be my ass that would get chewed out. Now can you please get yourself out of this locker room and into that press conference?" He chuckled loudly as he walked past me. I liked the guy, really I did but his sense of humour left a bit to be desired at times.

We squeaked in with moments to spare. I ducked round the door and slumped against the wall next to Karen, leaning my head back and staring at the ceiling.

"That was cutting it a bit fine," she muttered out of the corner of her mouth.

"He won't be hurried. You know he has to look just so." She shrugged and nodded her agreement.

The whole thing was full of the normal stuff – stars mouthing off at each other and making dire threats as to what they would do to each other in the ring. In all honesty I spent most of my time in there watching Mark. I hadn't lied the day before when I had told him that I missed him. I was used to speaking to him virtually every day. Most days we'd eat a meal together or grab a drink, or I would even just make sure I got to watch him practise. Not to mention the times when it worked out that we could actually stay together. It was simply that I loved spending time with him. If I had been asked to explain why I never would have been able to. It was just how it was.

There was definitely something very hot about the point at which Dave and Mark stood at the end of the press conference. Pretty much nose-to-nose, trying to stare each other down. Vintage stuff of course, but it was definitely a moment to raise the pulse rate quite substantially. Two huge hunks of men, both incredibly sexy with all that supposed pent up rage and a very healthy dollop of testosterone. It was the stuff of thousands of women's fantasies. I guess of a certain amount of men's fantasies as well. And I'd been closer to the pair of them than most would ever come. Much closer in the case of one of them of course.

After the press conference was over and we were free to go I left the arena quickly. On getting back to the hotel I intended to spend another thrilling evening in my room. My plan started to unravel when I got to my door and found Tara waiting for me.

"Problem?" I asked, surprised to see her there.

"Nope. I'm coming to drag you out," she said, following me through the door. "You're not going to carry on moping around. What's the problem, anyway? You've been off on your own since we went to that bar the other night."

"I went out last night. And things are a little complicated right now."

"I am not going to take no for an answer. You are coming out and that's final." I held up my hands in mock surrender.

"OK, just don't expect enthusiasm. Where are we going?" I stood up and stretched.

"Back to that bar. It seemed like a nice place." I frowned at her. "What are the odds of that guy being there again? Anyway, like I said, refusal is not an option."

"Damn right it is. I don't want to go." I sat on the end of the bed, refusing to move.

I may have mentioned at some point before just how persistent Tara is. It would generally be considered much easier to have gone along with her in the start as you could fairly safely guarantee that you would end up doing exactly what she wanted just to stop her from going on.

She practically forced me to change and dragged me out of the door. I reasoned that, if nothing else, I could get drunk for free at Tony's place. We were in the car and nearly there before I thought to ask her who else was going. She gave me a shifty look and didn't answer.

"Tara, are you trying to stir shit up?" She still wouldn't answer. "Tara, is Taker going to be there?" She bit her lip and nodded. "Did I piss you off in a former life?" I asked bitterly.

"Making you two get together and talk has always worked in the past," she burst out in her own defence.

I wiped angrily at my eyes with the heels of my hands. "Yeah, but this is different. Very different. This is not something that can be fixed by sitting down with a beer for a little chat, just the pair of us. Well, I guess it's too late now."

"Jade, what has happened? Why won't you tell me?" She sounded offended that I hadn't confided in her.

I loosed a deep sigh. "Did you ever meet Sara?"

She looked surprised. "Taker's ex? Yeah, once or twice. Well, saw her rather than met her, you know what I mean. What's she got to do with anything?"

"She's coming back on the scene. At least, I think she is. That's the problem. I don't know for sure, but it seems pretty damn likely."

Tara gazed at me, wide eyed. "Not good. What are you going to do about it?"

"Not much I can do. He can't tell me what he wants so I just have to leave him to make his mind up. That's why I'm taking these next few days off." She nodded. She already knew that I was going and where. I just hadn't told her the real reason why before that point.

As before Tony was behind the bar when we got there. He looked surprised to see me again.

"This is becoming a habit. Drink?"

I nodded. "Make it a double. My friend over there is trying to sort my problems out for me."

"And she thought bringing you here would be a good idea? I'm guessing your man will be making an appearance at some point then?" He put a glass in front of me and patted me on the arm in a comforting manner.

"Apparently so. Make my day for me, Tony. Tell me Damian isn't here." I picked up the drink and looked at him. He made a face and I drank the whiskey straight down. "Maybe you should just give me the bottle," I joked. He took me at my word and handed over a half full bottle.

"I want a good chunk of that back, mind you. Go talk to your friend. She looks worried." I glanced back over my shoulder and caught Tara's eye. It looked as if she was concerned that I was angry with her. I picked up the bottle and made my way over to her.

"Looks like you're all set for the evening," she said, pointing to the bottle.

"There are advantages to knowing the owner. The disadvantage is that his brother is here." She gave a little apologetic grimace and summoned up a topic of conversation quickly to distract me.

It must have been around an hour later that Mark arrived with Glen. I'd been exercising strict control with the bottle that Tony had given me and had only had a couple. Even though I had been warned and thought that I was prepared to deal with it my nerve still deserted me when I saw Mark and I stood up quickly, making the excuse to Tara that I was going to the rest room. I stepped away from the table and headed in that direction when I was hailed by what was possibly the one voice on the face of the earth that I least wanted to hear at that point.

"Jade! This is becoming a habit. You just can't stay away from me, can you?"

I stopped and turned my head slightly. "You know, I'm surprised you can walk upright, Damian. The weight of your head must play hell on your spine." He leant against the doorframe, arms crossed, just watching my reaction to him. He'd always prided himself on being able to get a rise out of me at any time. That had been no different when we'd been together. He'd just been aiming for a different result.

He shot me a grin. "I see you and your man are here tonight. Made up, have we?"

"No. We just both happen to be here." I folded my arms and glared at him.

He leaned in closer. "You know, I could make you forget all about him."

I looked him up and down in the most cold, calculating manner I could muster before raising my head and looking directly into his eyes. "Not a chance in hell."

I saw something flicker in his eyes. A cruel spark that danced across his features, twisting his handsome features for an instant. I'd woken his temper and past experience told me that he would most likely try to make me hurt in some way. And I had a fairly good idea how. His jaw tightened and he took a step back from me.

"What do you think you are to someone like him? A quick fuck, that's all it is. Someone to tumble as and when he feels like. Does he know anything about you?" My chin rose with every sentence he spoke. "Can he say what your favourite colour is? Favourite band? Does he care?"

Every word hit the target with unerring accuracy. He had articulated all of the insecurities that I had harboured for so long after I had become involved with Mark. In recent times I had thought that I had conquered those fears. Hearing them so baldly stated brought it all back to the front of my mind and I blinked hard, trying desperately to think up a reply.

As I stood there grasping for the words to say I felt someone standing behind me and didn't need to turn round to know who it was. As always I could sense him. The fact that Damian was now looking over my head helped.

"Her favourite colour is black. Favourite group is Metallica. Black album. I'd tell you what her favourite song was if she'd make up her mind between Sad but True, Unforgiven and Nothing Else Matters."

I looked back at Damian and shrugged. "Correct on all counts. Now, if you'll excuse me…" I pushed past him, not wanting to turn round. Damian grabbed my arm and swung me round, pulling me close in to his side so we were both facing Mark.

"I know one thing I've got that he hasn't." He leant in close to me. I knew what he was going to do and tried not to react. I'd told Dave once that I'd known a guy with a tongue piercing. Obviously enough that was Damian. He would run that little lump of metal along his teeth before using it on me in ways that drove me nearly out of my mind.

He did it then and, no matter how much I tried to control my movements, my head came up and my breath shortened. I could feel colour come into my cheeks and I knew my eyes had darkened. I saw Damian give a little victory grin out of the corner of my eye before he realised I wasn't looking at him.

I stood riveted to the spot, staring at Mark. My ribs were heaving as if I'd just been for a two-mile run and I swallowed nervously. I saw a flash of understanding in his eyes. He shifted his weight slightly, bringing one arm towards the front of his body, and that was just enough to give me the impetus to move. I shoved Damian's hand from my arm and walked swiftly away to the bathroom.

I hid away in there for about fifteen minutes before realising that I couldn't spend the whole night shut away like that. It did give me a chance to think though. Mark had shown a pretty good knowledge of me, had been able to answer at least the questions that Damian had thrown out. There were other things that I knew full well he knew and understood about me but I really couldn't be sure if any of it was enough to keep him. I also worried that maybe I should have been trying harder. But then, I had been trying hard the whole time. He needed to prove to me that he was willing to work at it too, especially after what had recently happened. Half measures were no good to me any more.

After a time I gathered myself together and went back out to find Tara. She gave me a concerned look as I took my seat back in the corner. I managed a small smile to reassure her but it soon faded. She decided I needed to be employed in something constructive and dragged me into the conversation she was in the middle of.

"Jade, you've been pretty vocal in the past about age gaps. What gaps have you had?"

"Ah, you talking about relationships or just sex?" I forewent the glass and took a swig straight from the bottle, not missing Tony shaking a finger at me.

"Any of them." She sat back and regarded me steadily.

"Shit, now you're making me think. Ben's four years older than me. There was another Ben who was five years younger. Then it went same age, two years younger. Hell, I can't think. Hang on a minute. Tony?" I called across the bar. "How much older are you than me?"

He thought for a second. "Seven years, I think."

"Sounds about right. Yep, seven years older."

"I thought he was gay?" Tara asked in confusion.

I shrugged. "He is. His twin isn't. Damian's two years older. Then it was Ben again. And then Mark is ten years older than me. What brought this on anyway?"

"Just remembering a conversation we had back in Houston. So which of those worked best for you?" She picked up her drink and looked at me over the rim of the glass.

"I don't really think age matters much in a one night stand. Well, a sixteen year old with a forty year old would be pretty gross, but other than that it's all relative. It depends on the people. My sister was eighteen when she married someone who was sixteen years older than her. I thought it was sick at the time, but then I was only fourteen and he was twenty years older than me. They're still happily married. Ben and I worked well together to start with because we both acted much older than we were. When we got back together he was still the same but I was actually behaving like someone in their early twenties. It never really worked properly after that."

She leaned into me conspiratorially. "I've been hearing rumours that Batista's marriage is on the rocks."

I sat up straight and glared at her. "Keep out of it Tara."

"Why?" She pouted at me, managing to look about fifteen.

"Because not everyone comes out of a marriage break up unscathed. You and I have been lucky in that respect. Neither of us was too upset about it and we were able to pick up and carry on. It's not always like that. Sometimes feelings don't just go away." I couldn't stop my eyes drifting to Mark at that point. He was sitting a couple of people to the side of Tara and watching us talk. It looked as if he had been listening as he met my eyes and gave me a faint sad smile.

"Oh, come on!" Tara exclaimed. "He's bound to need someone to talk to. Someone who's been through it." She smirked slightly. "I'll be there for him."

"If his marriage is breaking up, you need to keep right out of it. Give it six months to a year at least before you try to go striding in there. Less than that and you run the risk." I stopped suddenly.

"Risk of what?" she asked.

I glanced up at Mark again and swallowed. I was about to admit my greatest fear. "The risk of rebound."

"Huh, that would never happen to me." She spoke with the utter certainty of the young. It made me feel kind of old to think of it that way but it didn't change the fact of what it was.

I shook my head. "You know what, I'm tired. I think I'll head back and get some sleep. The next couple of days are going to be hectic."

I took the bottle back to Tony and gave him a hug, promising to try and drop back in before I left Florida and giving him my cell phone number. As no one else seemed ready to leave he called a cab for me and I rode back alone, pondering my conversation with Tara.

She was always more up on the gossip than I was, but then for the last few months I had been part of the gossip myself. As such I had largely ignored any rumours that I heard. I certainly hadn't heard the rumours she was talking about but felt bad that I had been dumping my problems on Dave if it was true.

The next day was spent mostly with the heavyweight champ, with a mammoth signing session in the morning and two interviews in the afternoon. I watched him carefully when it was quiet. Part of the problem was that his job involved a certain amount of acting, making it difficult to tell if there was something up. I certainly wasn't going to ask him about it. I was a believer in the fact that, if someone wanted to talk to me about their problems, they'd do it in their own time.

The following day was the big one – Summerslam itself. There were no signings or interviews on that day. Everything was focussed on the final preparations for that evening. I had made my decision about where I was going to go after the event had taken place and had a flight booked out of the state the following morning. My time was spent mostly in preparing the paperwork for the move to Georgia so that I could fly straight into Atlanta without having to go via Florida.

There was an air of excitement throughout the arena. Karen told me it always got like this before the big main pay per views. The mayhem only grew when the crowd started arriving and they could be heard way back in the back stage area.

Once the crowd was in place I started to get nervous, but for a completely different reason. I knew that Sara must be out there somewhere. Half of me wanted to leave the arena there and then, to hide away at the hotel until it was time to go to the airport the next morning. The masochistic side of me had me staying firmly where I was. Actually it wasn't just me being masochistic. I loved this job, everything about it. I worked in a business that I had been addicted to for half my life. I wasn't going to be driven out of it just like that.

That was the reason for escaping, just for a few days. If I just had a few days to deal with losing Mark I reckoned I could come back and carry on. After all, how hard could it be to avoid one person?

The show itself was highly entertaining. There was a cruiserweight battle royal to decide the number one contender. I always found the cruiserweights entertaining as they were so quick, although I would always prefer the heavyweights. Randy Orton won his match against Lashley, ending the on screen feud that had been grumbling along for the past few weeks. Shawn Michaels left the ring covered in blood as usual after his match with John Cena but was still victorious. I didn't even try to stop a small cheer as Kane and Big Show beat the crap out of MNM. I really couldn't stand Melina and the fact that her tits seemed to show up five minutes before she did. And, much as I didn't get on with Annie personally, her acting ability was much improved as she bemoaned Chris Jericho's loss of the Intercontinental title to Shelton Benjamin.

Finally it was time for the main event. The heavyweight championship match. I crept out to the gorilla area to watch on the monitor there. Of course I knew how the match ended and could work out a fair amount of how it would go but not the specific details. It was a long bout and looked utterly brutal. There were several choke slams and the Spanish announce table got flattened, as per usual. It was a big match so it didn't really take a genius to work out that the finishing move would be the tombstone. Despite knowing it was going to happen I still felt incredibly happy and proud of him when he stood after the pin to have his arm raised and be handed the belt. I stayed by the monitor to watch the entirety of his in ring celebration, only moving back into the hallways once he actually stepped through the ropes to make his way back.

Just for a few minutes I had been able to forget everything that was about to go down. I had got into the habit of always watching Mark's matches from there and would generally have waited for him to come back up the ramp, following him to his locker room and waiting while he had a shower. Occasionally if the room situation had been particularly annoying and it hadn't been a hard match I would join him in there. After that we would get something to eat, go for a drink with some of the others or just go back to the hotel and relax. It was unbelievably hard for me to walk away from what had become my usual spot just inside the curtain, knowing that I most likely wouldn't see him again until the future had been all decided. And that I had backed myself into a corner where I had no influence on that future. I had to play a waiting game, and it was going to nearly kill me.

I kind of floated around where there were a lot of people, hiding within the small crowd. Over time they drifted away until there were only a few left and I was just starting to think about going back to the hotel and packing up my stuff for the following morning.

"Excuse me," a voice came from behind me. "Could you help me?" I turned round to see a tall woman who looked vaguely familiar. "I'm trying to find my husband."

"A wrestler?" She nodded. "Sure. Which one?"

"The Undertaker." Shit, it was her. That explained why she had looked sort of familiar. The hair colour was different to her time in the WWE, dark now instead of blonde. As I looked at her I was brutally reminded of Glen's words to me when we had talked about her before. She was a real stunner. Younger than me, taller than me and definitely much more of a slender build than me. And she was now looking at me expectantly while I stood there and gawped like a moron. She'd completely thrown me by describing Mark as her husband.

"Uh, right. Follow me." I threaded my way through the corridors until I reached Mark's locker room. Taking a deep breath I raised my hand and knocked quickly.

"What?" He sounded irritable.

"Taker?" There was the sound of quick footsteps and the door flew open. Mark stood there looking down at me.

"Jade, I…"

I interrupted him. "Taker, your visitor is here." His eyes flickered over my shoulder and then back to me.

"Sara, could you just give me a couple of minutes? I have some work stuff I need to discuss and then we can talk." He stepped out of the doorway for her to walk through. I could see the big smile she was giving him as she went past me. He pulled the door nearly shut behind him as he came out into the corridor to speak to me. We just stood there and stared at each other as long seconds ticked by before I finally managed to work the lump from my throat enough to speak.

"I should go. I've got an early flight in the morning." He moved towards me and I stepped back, avoiding his touch. "I'm going to see my brother, in Chicago. I'll be back at the end of the week, in Atlanta."

He nodded. "I'll call you."

I shook my head. "Tara knows how to get hold of me in an emergency. I want a complete break from everything while I'm there, get my head straight." I glanced back up to his face. He didn't like it but I thought he understood. I put a hand out towards his arm and then clenched my hand into a fist, just short of actually touching him. "You'd better get in there," I said quietly. He didn't say anything, just lifted his chin slightly and went into the locker room. I stared at the door as it shut, trying desperately to hold back tears. I was so close to the door that I could hear Sara as she started to speak.

"Mark, I know I made a huge mistake. I never should have let you go."

I couldn't take any more. Blindly I ran from that door, paying no heed to where I went. I barely noticed as I shoved past people, back stage and stars alike that were getting ready to leave the arena for the night. I was only stopped by the sensation of having run into a brick wall.

"What's got into you?" I stepped back and looked up into Glen's face. "You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Maybe I have." I tried to collect myself, wrapping my arms round myself.

"What's happened?"

"I just had to take Sara to Mark's locker room." I bit my lip and stared at the floor.

"Oh Jade. I'm sorry." I heard an undertone in his voice.

"No, you're not. You told me that they are made for each other. You'd love to see them back together. Admit it."

He sighed. "It's true I said that. Mark is my friend. I just want to see him happy."

"No argument from me there. I just don't have to be happy about it. I'm going back to the hotel. I have to pack."

Glen looked concerned. "You got your car here?" I nodded. "I'll follow you back. You don't look in much of a state to go off on your own."

I waited while he got his gear together and then drove, very slowly for me, back to the hotel. I got there in one piece although my concentration was completely and utterly shot.

I didn't sleep at all that night. Didn't even go to bed. I just stared at the TV, not noticing what was on. I did wonder if my phone would ring and was completely unable to decide whether I would answer it or not if it did. When it didn't I wasn't sure if I felt better or worse. My mind, traitorous at the best of times, insisted on conjuring up pictures of them together, all of the things that Mark had done to my body now being done to Sara.

After what felt like the longest night of my life the alarm went off. I rose from my seat and picked up my bags. It was time to go to the airport.


	16. Chapter 16

I got to the airport and turned in the rental car. Making my way wearily to the check in desk I was preparing myself for the endless seeming wait in the departure lounge.

"Right, if you'd like to collect your hand luggage and come with me, Miss Baron." The attendant stepped round from behind the desk. "This way please."

"What's going on?" I asked, confused.

"Your ticket has been upgraded. I'll just take you to the business class lounge." I followed along behind and was soon settled into the distinctly more comfortable chairs in a group of people who were much better dressed than I was.

It was only the second time that I had been in business class on a plane. The first time had been when I was summoned out of coach because Mark was bored. The first day I had ever really spoken to him. So much had happened since then and it felt like an eternity had passed.

There was a connecting flight to catch in Atlanta. Of course, that was where I was going to be returning to at the end of the week in time for Smackdown. The total flying time to Chicago was five and a half hours, meaning that I got there at around noon Florida time, eleven am Illinois time. It felt distinctly chilly in the Windy City after the amount of time I had spent in the Florida sunshine and I was glad to have put some extra clothes in my hand luggage rather than having them all packed away with my other stuff.

I hadn't seen my oldest brother since shortly after I had arrived on US soil. There were four of us, me, my sister and two brothers. Out of all us kids, Andy and I were the closest despite being the furthest apart in age.

He gave me a huge hug when we found each other. I was almost sure that I heard my ribs creaking before he placed me back on my feet and looked me over.

"Look a little pale, sis." He took in what I was wearing. I'd always wanted one of those Deadman Inc shirts but had never got round to buying one. Still, I'd finally managed to get one. This one went one better than having bought one. I'd nabbed it from the Deadman himself. "Still not over that Undertaker obsession then? What does that Mark think of it?"

I gave him a little smile. "Doesn't worry him."

"Understanding sort of bloke then, is he? And why on earth did you have to get one that was so big?" Andy picked up my gear and started to make his way towards the exit.

"Not really. It's just that he is the Undertaker. And this is his shirt."

He looked at me and started laughing. "The phone call from home suddenly makes much more sense to me now."

"She called you?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Yep," he stated cheerfully. "All I managed to understand was ranting about tattoos and middle-aged men."

I winced. "Ouch. I most definitely wouldn't describe him as middle-aged. Anyway, I'm supposed to be here for a break and that is bordering dangerously on talking about work. I suppose she told you what I do for a living?"

He nodded as we reached the car. "I think she was getting used to the idea when she spoke to me. You were quick off the mark getting out of that plane, weren't you?"

"My ticket was upgraded to business class." I shrugged. "Found out when I checked in."

"How did that happen?"

"I'm not sure. I do have a sneaking suspicion, but that's all it is."

It was about an hour's drive from the airport to Andy's house. We chatted about inconsequential things on the journey. He wanted to know how the home place had been when I had been there and some of the things I had seen while travelling about all over the place.

Stepping through to door into Andy's home I felt as if I had been on the receiving end of one of Edge's spears as my nephew and niece threw themselves at me.

"Aunt Jade! How long are you here for?" My nephew, Todd, stepped back and looked up at me.

"Hey kids. Good to see you too!" I swung Ellie up onto my hip. "I have to be in Atlanta Thursday morning so I'm here for a couple of days. Hi Jenny." Andy's wife came out of the living room and relieved of her five-year-old daughter.

"You look tired," she said, putting an arm round my shoulders for a quick hug.

"Aunt Jade?" Todd spoke up again. "Is it true that you work with the wrestlers?" I smiled at him and nodded. "Have you got any pictures?" He was bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet.

"Sure I have. Just let me find them and I'll show them to you." Shortly afterwards I was settled with a cup of coffee and both children snuggled up to me on the couch as we went through my collection of photos. There were some really nice ones that Tara had taken of me with Mark, when we hadn't known that she had a camera. She had copies made for me.

"There sure are a lot of pictures of you with the Undertaker," Todd said in an awed voice. He looked up at me. "You look sad Aunt Jade. What's the matter?"

I shook my head slightly. "These are my friends as well as the people I work with. I just miss them, that's all." He looked back at the photos in my hands, apparently satisfied with the answer. I saw Andy cast a glance in my direction and focussed my attention back on the kids.

"Which ones are your friends?" Todd asked excitedly.

"Hmm, let's see. Batista, he's definitely a friend. And Kane."

"Aren't you scared of him?" Ellie asked, eyes wide.

"Well, sometimes," I answered, trying hard not to smile. "Edge and Lita are a lot of fun. Big Show is really nice, too. And Triple H sometimes."

"What about the Undertaker? Is he your friend?"

"You know what, Todd? For most of the time I've worked for the WWE, the Undertaker has been my best friend."

"But he's scary too!" Ellie burst out, looking alarmed.

I couldn't help smiling again. "Hmm, he definitely can be but not always. I tell you what, when we come up near to Chicago to do a show next, I'll make your Dad get you some tickets. When that happens you can come back stage after the show and meet some of your favourites. How does that sound?"

"Can we, Dad?" Todd asked, eyes bright with excitement.

"I don't see why not," Andy replied, sitting on the arm of the couch.

"Can we watch Raw tonight with Aunt Jade?"

"You can Todd. It's after Ellie's bedtime, so we will have to tape it for her."

"What about the pretty ladies? Are any of them your friends?" Ellie asked.

"To be honest they tend to be pretty good at looking after themselves so I don't have a lot to do with them. I mostly have to look after the men."

"Good," Todd stated. "Girls suck."

"Only if you're lucky," I heard Andy mutter.

We had lunch soon after that and then Ellie dragged me outside to see her pony. Andy had done well in his job and owned a few acres of land where his house was outside of the city. Ellie had a little Welsh pony and Jenny had a couple of horses. In fact, Andy and Jenny had met when he gave me a lift one time to the place where I had gone riding in the UK, back before I had been old enough to drive myself. Widget was a cute little grey pony and clearly he and Ellie adored each other.

The afternoon was spent playing with the pony and then just sitting and talking with the family. Of all my family I regretted the distance from Andy the most, even though we were in the same country. The sheer distances involved and the fact that I was rarely in the same place for more than a few days made keeping in contact much trickier. Still, it was easier than when he'd been in the US while I was still in the UK.

It was hard to watch Raw on the TV. It had been months since I'd watched any of the wrestling on the small screen and it just didn't compare to being there and feeling the atmosphere. Todd enjoyed it though, jumping up and down on the couch, cheering and booing at the top of his voice. The last match was a surprise to me. JR said that Batista had demanded a rematch against the Undertaker. The match was set up even more brutally than the one from the night before and at the end of it both men appeared to have been injured. Todd went to bed straight after the programme was over and Andy was opposite where I still stared at the screen, biting my bottom lip.

"You look worried," he said, leaning forward to catch my eye.

"I guess I am a little. Neither one of them is scheduled to have any time off. I've heard rumours of personal problems for Batista so it may be that he's taking some time to sort that out." I wrapped my arms round myself.

"No reason that you know of for your man though?"

"Not that I know of. Unless…" I took a deep breath. There was one reason that Mark may have needed time off so soon after last night.

"Why don't you call him? Put your mind at rest?" Andy leaned back in his chair, convinced that I would do just that.

"Because I haven't been completely honest with you about why I'm here." He frowned and sat up straight again. "Mark's ex-wife turned up last night. She wants him back. Judging by what's just happened, I think he might be trying to sort things out with her."

"She turned up last night and that's it?" Andy sounded outraged.

"No, it's been going on for weeks. She called and said she wanted to see him and she lives in Florida. Things have been difficult for a while to say the least. He's not the easiest of men to be involved with at the best of times." I ran my hands through my hair. "From what I've just seen, he isn't really my problem any more."

I didn't think I would get any sleep that night either but emotion and sheer exhaustion saw to that. It was a restless night, full of dreams that had me waking up with tears running down my face. At five o clock in the morning I turned my cell phone on to see if anyone had tried to reach me. There were a couple of missed calls on there, both from Mark but he hadn't left a message.

The kids picked up on my mood the following day and tried to cheer me up. When that didn't work, Jenny insisted that we saddled up her two horses and went for a ride. Her theory was that a good gallop on a nice horse could fix any number of ills. I hadn't sat on a horse for months and thoroughly enjoyed myself while we were out. Sitting on a living animal with a brain of its own means that you have to concentrate on it. Thinking about other things can lead to you getting spectacularly dumped on the ground, particularly with an animal you don't know.

We went to the movies that evening, three adults and two children to see a funny little kids film. There are some things that I had always known I would never grow out of, and fairy tale type stories were one of them. Ellie insisted on sitting in my lap for the whole duration of the movie and kept my mind quite conclusively on what was happening on the big screen in front of us.

The following day, the last one I was going to spend in Chicago, the phone rang in the middle of the morning.

"Jade?" Jenny called. "Someone called Tara wants to speak to you."

I got to the phone in double quick time. "Tara? What's up?"

"Just wanted to see how you are." She sounded hesitant. "Did you watch Raw?"

"In all honesty, I've been better. And yes, I did. What's going on?"

"The rumours were right about Batista. He's gone home to spend some time with his family, try and get his marriage back on track." There was a hint of disappointment in her voice.

"Hmm, I thought that was what it might be." I paused before speaking the next thought that came into my mind. "And Mark?"

"All anyone knows is that he has gone home. Apparently he'll be gone for about three weeks."

"Oh." My mind raced for a few moments. "Oh," I said, much quieter. "Any idea which home?"

"No-one knows or, at least, if anyone does they're certainly not saying. Are you still coming to Atlanta?" she asked.

"Yeah, I'll be there. Taping is tomorrow night, isn't it? I haven't checked my paperwork since I ran through the lists before Summerslam."

"Yep, tomorrow night. There's had to be some quick switching around with those two having gone off, so it's all a bit different to how it looked before you left. Are you OK?" She sounded concerned.

"I don't really know, Tara. I just need to process what's happened. Look, I'll see you tomorrow, OK?"

"Kids, why don't you go play in the garden for a little while?" Andy said as I put the phone down. "I think me and your Aunt Jade need to have a little talk." Once the kids had gone and he was sure that the door had closed behind them he wrapped his arms round me. I held out for a few seconds and then fell apart.

I wasn't much of a guest for the rest of my time spent with my family. I tried my best to be cheerful with the children but it was hard going at times. I had never been this distraught before, at least not over a relationship going awry. Much as I was dreading going back to work, I think it was a relief both to myself and Andy's family when I climbed into the car very early on Thursday morning to catch my flight to Atlanta. I hugged each member of the family and reminded Andy about bringing the kids to visit when the show reached Chicago. I also promised to be more cheerful when that happened.

Once I got to Atlanta there was no point leaving as the flight from Florida was due only a couple of hours after mine had landed. I dug a book out of my bag to while away the time until the plane was due. It was another reminder of the past – the book of short stories by Stephen King that I had lent to Mark and only recently got back from him.

The worst thing about the first day back was the pitying looks from a large chunk of the roster. Annie of course was highly delighted and burst into peals of laughter every time she caught my eye, mouthing the words 'told you so' every now and again. I did find something out about myself though. I had never realised that I had such tolerance. I also found that I had come to rely on Dave's promise of being there for me to talk to if I needed him. He wasn't there and that made the whole thing much harder to cope with.

It was like stepping back a few months. I stopped going to the tapings and spent most of my evenings in the hotel rooms. Tara got annoyed with me refusing to be dragged out and, after the first week, stopped asking me any more. I took only enough interest in the feuds and scripts to know what I would have to be doing. The change had been noticed as I was summoned to the arena one afternoon in the second week. Peter had come to see me. The last time I had seen him was at the end of my probationary period, when he had voiced concerns over my involvement with Mark.

"Jade, come in and sit down," he said when I knocked on the door of the room he had set up as an office. "There's no problem as such," he went on, seeing the worried look on my face. "I've come to chat to a few members of staff about various things and thought we could have a talk while I'm here."

"This is about me and Taker, isn't it?" I asked quietly.

He nodded. "Karen tells me you're not happy at the moment."

I shrugged and glanced around the room. "It's just personal stuff. Nothing to do with the job. I said that it wouldn't affect my ability to do my job and it hasn't. Furthermore, it won't."

He leaned back in his chair, fingers laced together in front of him. "Are you sure about that? It's been confirmed that the Undertaker will be returning on Smackdown in two weeks. Will you be able to cope with that?"

"I'll be fine, Peter. I'll be utterly professional."

"OK. Karen was just worried about you."

I left the arena again soon after that. I felt a pressing need to do something. Shopping wasn't going to cut it. So I did something else that I had done in the past to cheer myself up, after flicking through a local classified phone book.

Later that evening I was sat on my bed in the hotel room I was sharing with Tara, reading a magazine. She came in and sat next to me, nudging my thigh with her knee. She leapt up and stumbled away in shock when I leapt to my feet and swore loudly.

"Shit! Easy on the leg, Tara. It's a little sore."

"Have you hurt yourself?" she asked, still breathless from the scare of my reaction.

"Not exactly." I wriggled out of the track pants I was wearing to show her a dressing stuck to the top of my right thigh.

"More tattoos?" she asked, pulling a slight face.

"Just the one. Wanna see?" She nodded, interested despite her attempt at showing revulsion. I pulled the dressing off carefully, revealing the tattoo underneath. Luckily I had never bled much when being tattooed. The worst had been the rose on my shoulder.

Underneath the white padding there was now a sort of tribal design grim reaper with a scythe. It was done as an outline in black, going down to about the figure's waist where the robes disintegrated into tatters of black. She looked it over closely before focussing on the top of the design, right up on the reaper's head.

"Isn't that a symbol on its hood?" she asked, eyeing me. I nodded. "Isn't that the Undertaker's symbol?"

"Caught me," I said, giving her a rueful little grin. "I'm a sentimental old sod at heart. Always swore I'd never get someone's name tattooed on me though. Similar thing but not quite as potentially difficult."

It was a few days after that when Dave arrived back in the fold. It looked as if things hadn't gone particularly well for him on his visit home and he looked fairly tired. Tara made several comments about looking after him and we eventually had a full-blown argument over it when I told her to grow up and that the earth did not revolve around her love life. Or lack of it as she had stopped seeing Helms a few days before. She accused me of becoming a bitter, twisted dried up old hag.

Once I'd calmed down and stopped throwing things I could sort of see her point. I wasn't much fun to be around at the moment. Deciding that I had to do something to get my mind off me, I decided to go visit Dave and see how he was. I went to the arena to do it, and knocked on the door of his locker room.

"Hey," I said softly when he opened the door. "How you doing?"

"Not so good," he replied, stepping back to allow me to enter. I walked in and sat on a chair, knees hugged up against my chest.

"The talking thing works both ways if you want it to."

He sighed. "Right now I don't know what I want. I can't seem to say anything to make it better. I'm never there when she needs me, never there for the kids. She always knew what I wanted to do and what it would mean." I got up and shifted my chair next to him, putting my hand on his shoulder.

"I have an idea. It's of no practical use to either one of us but it works for me."

"Yeah? What's that?" he asked, looking at me out of the corner of his eye.

"It involves somewhere quiet, you, me," I could see him begin to frown, wondering where this was going, "and a large bottle of Jack. We're both feeling pretty shitty at the moment."

"I forgot about that. What happened?" I removed my hand from his shoulder and rested my chin in my hands, elbows propped on my knees.

"I haven't seen or spoken to him since Summerslam. Last thing I knew, I was taking Sara to his locker room. No one can tell me where he's gone other than 'home' but that could be one of two places. He tried to call me a couple of times that night but didn't leave a message, and he hasn't tried since. I think I have my answer, don't you?"

He gave me a commiserating look. "My turn to buy, isn't it?"

As we made our separate ways back to the hotel I called my brother to let him know that the WWE circus was currently heading in his direction. From Georgia we had gone to Louisiana and Arkansas and were currently in Tennessee. Next stop would be Missouri followed by the town of Rosemont in Illinois in just over two weeks time. After giving him the details and him promising to be there with the kids (but minus Jenny who really couldn't see the attraction in watching wrestling) he asked me how I was.

"Any news?"

"Nope. I'm doing OK though to what I thought I might be by this stage. How I'll be when I come face to face with him God alone knows. However, I am about to go and get drunk with a friend who is in a vaguely similar situation, so I'll call you before we get up your way. See ya later bruv."

As I had thought getting drunk served absolutely no useful purpose whatsoever. Especially not for my head which felt incredibly sore the next morning. Particularly as I was woken up by Tara banging things around in the room loudly. I thought at first that she was still pissed with me over the row from the day before. I found out the real reason when I managed to lever myself into a sitting position and found that Dave and I had curled up together on top of my bed to go to sleep. He looked as fragile as I felt when I finally managed to wake him up.

"Get off my bed, you great lump," I muttered, pushing at him. "Go get ready to go to the arena."

"I suppose you'll be wanting a ride to the arena judging by the state of you when I got back last night?" Tara asked loudly. She was standing over the pair of us, hands on her hips and looking most disapproving.

"Yeah, but quieter would be nice," I whispered in reply. She just tutted and announced that she was going for breakfast. I turned slightly green at the concept and dragged myself off the bed.

"I need a shower."

"Me too," came the reply from the bed. Dave had got himself turned onto his back and was watching me through narrowly slitted eyes.

"You'd better go get one then." I braced myself on my feet and stretched, groaning as my head span lazily.

"I would, if I could remember my room number." He hauled himself up to a sitting position.

"Well, I'm sorry but I'm not sharing. You'll have to find out. Try ringing reception." I pointed vaguely in the direction of the phone. Stumbling into the bathroom I stripped off and stepped into the shower, sticking my head under the hot water in the hope of clearing it a bit. It didn't really work but I was damned if I was going to voluntarily order one of those disgusting egg things. I knew they worked from the time I'd been made to drink one before but sometimes the end does not justify the means.

There was about a week left at that point until Mark was scheduled to return. I was stuck once more in a hectic state of not being able to wait for something to come while at the same time dreading it. It was almost exactly the same way I had felt about going to Florida. Part of me desperately wanted to see him, the part that hadn't given up hope. After all, no news is good news, right? Most of me, however, held out no hope at all. That part was undecided about how seeing him would feel. It was going to hurt, if he ever summoned up the balls to tell me that he was back with Sara. It was going to hurt like hell and there was no escaping that fact. But hen I really did want to see him, even if just to know that he was all right. Right from that very first day of speaking to him when he had missed the flight I had never gone this long without talking to him. I missed his company and friendship as much as mourning the loss of our relationship.

It took Tara a couple of days to start talking to me after finding me and Dave drunk and snoring on my bed. I was pretty annoyed with her about it. We'd both been perfectly decently dressed and I'd simply been lying with my head on his ribs while his arm had been round my waist. I thought at the time that she was pissed because she wanted to be the one offering comfort, and hoping that it would turn into more.

They made a big thing of the fact that the Undertaker was coming back, showing little teaser video clips on the big screens during the Raw and Smackdown shows on that week before he was due back, and then longer clips on the Raw of the actual week. It was to be expected. After all, he was the current Heavyweight champion and his character gave creative a lot to work with whenever he returned from a lay off.

As the time for his return drew nearer I would sometimes find myself in the evenings sitting with my cell phone in my hand. Doing nothing more useful than starting at his number. I had told myself many times over the preceding weeks that I wouldn't contact him but still I would sit there staring at the little screen in front of me. I went so far as to push the send button once but hung up before it started ringing. What would I have done if Sara had answered his phone as he had done mine on occasion?

By the time it was only two days before Smackdown I was hyped right up. He was scheduled to arrive at the airport the following day and I had already triple checked his flight and hotel arrangements. I couldn't help wondering slightly as I confirmed his room details if he would be on his own. I shook my head fiercely at that. I was just doing my job. That did not involve speculating about the private lives of the people I was working with, unless that involved me. Right at this moment, Mark Calaway's private life clearly didn't involve me and that was all there was to it.

That argument held up until that night when I once more found myself sat on my bed, phone in my hand. Quickly, before I could change my mind I typed in a text message.

_Hi. Hope you are getting things sorted out to your liking and that you are OK. See you around. J._

I brought up his cell phone number and pressed send. The screen flashed, telling me it was sending the message and then beeped once, showing 'Message delivered to Mark.'

As I knew I didn't have a cat in hell's chance of getting to sleep unaided that night I went to a pharmacy and bought some herbal sleeping tablets. I'd always been leery of using sleeping tablets since being given them after an accident as a teenager and finding after one week that I couldn't get to sleep without them. I reckoned that I should be all right with herbal ones though. They worked quickly and, for once, I slept right through the night, not woken by any dreams.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N - reaching the rating again

After waiting so long for his return it was a bit of an anti-climax. He didn't reply to my text but then I hadn't really expected him to. I knew what time he should have been arriving at the airport and, from that roughly what time at the hotel. Being the professional, mature woman that I was, I hid.

Hiding was something I had become good at. I caught sight of him once or twice at the arena but always managed to get away before he saw me. I would kick myself once I was away from him, but still couldn't resolve the internal argument about whether or not I actually wanted to speak to him.

I managed to keep it up for two days, until the day of the Smackdown taping. I had been wandering around the arena as usual, thinking I might go and have a chat with Dave after his match when he approached me himself in the hallway.

"Hi," I said, stopping in front of him. "How are things?"

He pulled a face. "So so. Been better, been worse I guess. I've been asked to fetch you. Come this way."

"Is there a problem?" I asked, hurrying to fall into step with him.

"Not really. You just have to come with me." I was puzzled, and his face told me absolutely nothing. I was even more confused when we got to our destination.

"Dave, why did you have to bring me to the gorilla area?"

"Just wait," he said, pointing me in the direction of the monitor. I looked at the screen and saw that it was the last action of the night. A verbal confrontation with a little pushing and shoving between Mark and Hunter, setting up the feud for the next big title defence.

"Come off it," I moaned, trying to step backwards and away from the area. Dave just got hold of my arms and held me there effortlessly.

"Just watch the monitor and keep quiet."

"What bloody point is this serving? Some damn friend you are." I rolled my eyes and stared obstinately at the ceiling, flatly refusing to look at the screen. It could serve no purpose as far as I was concerned. I'd seen him in the ring so many times that there could be nothing new for me to see here. I did listen to the talking though, and heard that there was some commotion going on. From the crowd reaction I guessed that somehow Hunter had been flattened. I didn't need to see the screen to know what Mark was doing now. Standing over Hunter with his eyes rolled up into his head and his tongue right down his chin. I had closed my eyes and the picture in my mind was so vivid that I could have been stood out there by the apron.

There was silence from the commentary team of Michael Cole and Tazz for an instant. Then I heard Cole speaking again.

"Well, that's new." I opened my eyes and turned to the monitor in curiosity but whatever it was that had puzzled them had gone. Mark was standing once more with the belt in his hand.

"OK, I stood here for the entire time. Let me go, Dave."

He shook his head. "Nope. Enough is enough. It's time this was sorted."

"Gee, thanks," I said sarcastically. "I've had a pretty good streak of avoiding the issue going on."

"I thought that wasn't your style." He leaned down and whispered in my ear. "You'll thank me for this one day." He let go of me and walked away.

I thought of bolting quickly away between Dave leaving and Mark coming up the ramp but wasn't quick enough. As I turned to leave I came face to face with him having just stepped through the curtain. We both stopped stock-still and stared at each other.

He looked very dark and moody with the hat and the collar of his duster pulled right up. Unusually he was wearing a shirt underneath rather than his usual wrestling gear.

"Er, I have stuff I should…"

"Jade," he said, speaking at the same time. We both stopped and carried on just standing there.

"I should get on. I have things I should be doing." I made to turn away.

"Wait. Just come with me. Please." That last word made me grind to a halt immediately. I didn't think I'd ever heard him say it before. "We need to finish this."

I took a couple of very deep breaths. "OK."

Mark led the way to his locker room. I followed him in and shut the door, leaning against the wall next to it as if prepared for a quick getaway. He watched me for a few seconds.

"Come and sit on a damn chair. I ain't going to bite you." He took off the hat and duster, dropping them on the floor beside a chair which he than sat in. I slowly went to the other chair and sank into it.

"You've been avoiding me," he stated.

"I guess so." I laced my fingers together on my lap and stared hard at them.

"Jade, look at me." My head jerked up and my eyes met his for the first time. "Why have you been avoiding me?"

I closed my eyes and leaned back in the chair. "I would have thought that would be fairly self-explanatory." He made an indistinct noise in his throat. "Last time I saw you, you were walking through the door to where your ex-wife was waiting for you. I heard what she said when you went in there."

"You were listening?" His gaze stayed on me, never wavering. I felt as if I looked at every other point in the room other than at him.

"Not really. I just heard that as soon as the door was shut. I left after that." I swallowed nervously and opened my eyes. "I didn't want to hear any more after that."

"I tried to call you."

"I saw. When you didn't leave a message, I just… I don't know. I didn't really know what to think." He didn't speak, just carried on watching me. "Well, that's not true. I know what I thought. What I think."

"And?" He was a master at carrying on a conversation in single syllables. Every time we had ever had a serious talk it would be me spouting off and he would put in a single word here and there.

"Then Tara called me and told me that you'd gone home. Depending on what happened that could have been one of two places." I was back to examining my hands again.

"Jade, look at me," he said again. Reluctantly I did as I was told. Thinking that this may be the last time I would see him like this I looked him over carefully, while still avoiding his eyes as much as possible. Now he had taken the duster off the shadows had gone from his body. Looking down past his face to his neck I saw a flash of something white at the base.

"What's that?"

"What?" he asked, trying to see where I was looking. I stood up and stepped slowly over to him, stretching out a hand.

"That."

"I'll get to that." There was something slightly off about the way he was talking but I couldn't work out what it was. "We haven't finished talking yet."

"Mark, don't do this. Just tell me what happened." I made to turn away but he caught hold of my wrist. I tried to pull away but he wouldn't release me. Angry now, I swung round to face him.

"Jade," he started, glancing up at me.

"Mark, what the fuck is your problem?" He jerked back slightly, surprised at the change in my demeanour. "Just how damn difficult is it to tell me what the fuck is going on? Don't play with me. You've dragged me through this little personal hell for too long and I've had enough. I can't take any more and I won't take any more. If you are back with Sara than tell me now so I can get the fuck out of here and try to get my life back together." I paused, breathing hard. Mark opened his mouth to speak but I was in full flow now. "I already know what's happened but I need you to tell me. It's perfectly fucking obvious, the way you disappeared like that." He dropped my arm and got to his feet, towering over me.

"Jade…"

I glared up into his face. "Just have the fucking balls to tell me what you did. Show the guts to admit to me that you chose your ex fucking wife."

"That's enough!" His voice echoed alarmingly around the room. "Just shut your damn mouth for a minute and let me talk." I jerked in shock at the way he had shouted at me, but it had the effect he was after. My mouth shut with an audible snap.

"Going off like that was a mistake," he ground out through a tightly clenched jaw. "I tried to call but you didn't answer. I wanted to tell you what happened but you made it look like your mind was already made up. Looked like you were lining my successor up, too." My head shot back up angrily at that. There was only one person he could have been referring to.

"You thought I was planning to run off and shag Damian?" I could feel my temper rising back up to the boil.

"I wondered. Sometimes. You looked at him like you'd rather fuck than fight. Came over a little hypocritical."

"Hypocritical? You are comparing me bumping into somebody I left seven years ago and had never seen since to you meeting up with the wife you divorced nine months ago because she annoyed you? Wait just a fucking minute here, Mark. That is in no way the same. I told Damian from the start that I was with you and wasn't the slightest bit interested in him. What did you tell Sara about me? Did you even mention my existence? Did you even think how it must have been for me to be the one that had to bring her to you? Did you?"

"Just shut the hell up and listen to me for once." He was angry now, a deep frown on his face and a low dangerous voice. "You really want to know why I took the time off? Do you?" I nodded, a little wary of him like this. He put up a hand to the white thing on his throat and peeled it off slowly. "That enough fuckin' answer for you?"

I froze completely, unable to believe what I was seeing in front of my eyes. It had gone. He had been and had the tattoo removed from the base of his throat. I was utterly speechless. Mark stood there, arms by his sides and fists clenched, glaring down at me.

"I made my choice," he continued. "I chose you." My shoulders dropped from where they had bunched up as I had been shouting. I was rooted to the spot and felt completely unable to move. He stepped forward until we were almost touching before dropping a hand on my shoulder, stooping slightly to look right into my eyes. "I chose you."

I started to shake as the tension left my body in a rush. My knees threatened to spill me to the ground and it was only because he hooked his arm round my back that I managed to stay upright. He came closer, then closer still until finally his mouth came over mine.

It was a surprisingly sweet and gentle kiss given the fury that had been raging round the room in the seconds before. After a few seconds he swept his tongue along my lips and I opened for him. There was something strange though and I stepped back quickly.

"What was that?" I had half a suspicion but didn't think it would really be possible.

He smirked a little and leaned right over so his mouth was next to my ear. I could feel the small puff of air over my skin as he chuckled slightly. Inclining his head towards my ear there was, what for me anyway, was an unmistakeable noise. I stepped back sharply and looked up at him.

"Show me." He shot me a grin and stuck out his tongue, showing the titanium stud sitting on its surface. I swallowed again and stood up as tall as I could on my toes to catch his tongue in my mouth once more. We continued like this for a while before Mark pulled back and smiled down at me.

"Let's go back to the hotel." He gathered his things together and we stepped out of the locker room. "Aw hell, I dropped my elbow support when I came out of the ring. Come on, we'll go get it and head out the side door."

We got to the gorilla and I sat on the stairs while he looked for his lost kit. I couldn't wipe the stupid grin off my face. As I looked around, I could hear him muttering and then tapping his new tongue stud against a tooth. My head came up and a germ of an idea came into my mind.

"Got it." He came back to me and stuffed it into his bag. "What?" He looked suspicious. I have a face that is easily read by people that know me and I would have guessed at that point that it would have been easy to see that I was up to something. "What are you thinking about?"

"Hmm, just contemplating." I stood up from the step and moved over to him, stretching out a hand and laying it on his chest. "Come with me." I hooked a finger in his belt and started to back up the stairs. He dropped his bag again and followed me, a quizzical expression on his face. I manoeuvred him to the top of the staircase and pushed at his chest slightly, getting him to lean back against the wall. His eyes dropped to my hands and then back to my face as I undid his belt and jeans.

He tilted his head slightly and then it dropped back against the wall as I knelt on the floor and took him into my mouth. It had been over a month since we had been together in any way. There was a low deep rumble in his chest as I worked my mouth on him, taking in as much as I could before sliding back up to the tip. It was a ridiculous place to choose as the show was not long over and anyone could turn up at any point. That in mind, I reluctantly stopped what I was doing and stood back up. Mark was leaning back against the wall, eyes closed.

"Maybe we should find somewhere a little less public." His eyes came open and he looked down at me with a crooked grin.

"Don't stop now. It'll be a while before they get near." He gazed at me with heavy lidded eyes as I knelt down again and went to work seriously. I had become familiar with just about every inch of his body over the past few months and took my time exploring his reactions anew to everything that I was doing to him. He hissed through his teeth as I scraped my teeth oh so gently up his length, moving back to run my tongue up the same path before dipping it into the slit on the crown, swiping away the fluid accumulating there. His hand dropped to the back of my neck and his hips started to move slightly as the sensations grew until I heard him curse under his breath and his shaft began to pulse repeatedly, thrusting slightly as he filled my mouth to nearly overflowing.

I rocked back on my heels and turned my head up to look at him. He was watching me with a lazy smile and moved his hand from the back of my neck to run a finger along my jaw line. I rocked my head back, enjoying the light tickling sensation before standing once more. I went to close his jeans but he put a hand on my wrist to stop me and shook his head.

"We ain't done yet, darlin'."

I looked around where we were standing. "I'm not stripping here." The smile became a smirk.

"No need." He moved off of the wall and kissed me again, sliding his hands down to undo my jeans. He pushed them down just far enough to work his hand inside and I could feel his grin against my lips as he felt that state I had worked myself into.

He pulled me back down a couple of stairs and positioned me to his liking, kneeling on one step and with my hands braced on the top one. Working my jeans a little further down my legs he went down a few more steps. I worked out what he was planning and braced myself, pushing back a bit to make what he was trying to do easier. It was made more intense by the fact that my jeans held my legs together, making everything much tighter. I was panting hard from the start and the sensations were truly mind blowing. I could feel every single movement, no matter how small.

The stairs under my knees were digging into my kneecaps and the edge of the top stair felt almost as if it was cutting into my hands as I pushed back against him. As the friction increased with his speed and power it was becoming so much more difficult to keep quiet. I bit my lip in an effort to stay silent, managing to quell most of the noise. I heard him groan deep in his chest as I held all my muscles tense and it made me feel like shouting at the top of my lungs. I bit down so hard on my lip I could feel blood start to trickle down my chin and still the pleasure kept building. The pain added a bittersweet tang to the waves of feeling climbing quickly to a peak.

Mark reached out an arm around my leg and rubbed one long finger over my clit. That was enough to send me spiralling over the edge, grinding my teeth further into my lip in an effort to go no louder than a strangled whimper. Every movement that Mark made as he moved quickly and smoothly now felt amplified, sending already sensitive nerve endings into a complete overload.

It seemed to go on and on forever. Every time the sensation would start to diminish he would move slightly differently, stimulating a different area. I started to get dizzy and had to drop my head forward, reduced now to groaning. Mark drove on to his own release and leant over me, hands braced on the steps either side of me as he regained his breath. He carefully withdrew and pulled me gently to my feet, turning me round to face him.

"You're bleeding," he frowned, wiping my chin with his thumb. I cuffed the rest of it away and put my clothes straight. "Come on, they're nearly here." For the first time I could hear the noises coming from the arena. It sounded as if they were onto the ramp. Much longer and we could have been caught.

I was a bit wobbly on my legs as we made our way out of the side door and round to the car park. I recovered enough to drive my car back to the hotel and found Mark waiting for me in the lobby.

"You going to get your stuff?" he asked, slinging an arm over my shoulder as we entered the elevator.

"Yeah. Just need to speak to Dave as well." I saw his eyebrow come up. "I need to thank him. He's the one responsible for me being there when you came up the ramp. I owe him one."

"Hmm," he rumbled, unconvinced.

"Come with me then. Look, I just want to see how he is. It's been a tough time for him." I caught the elevator doors before they closed on my floor

"I'll see you up at our room." He ran a finger down my cheek and I stepped out to head to mine and Tara's room.

"You look happier," she observed when I went inside.

"Life is good," I grinned, stuffing my belongings into my bag.

"You mean…"

"I mean you are on your own tonight. I have somewhere else to be."

"You mean Taker…"

I rolled my eyes at her. "Who else would I mean?"

"But everyone was convinced that he's gone back to his wife." Her eyes were wide with shock.

"Yeah, me too. But he hasn't. Look, did you do Mark for the show tonight?" She nodded. "See the dressing on his neck?"

"Yeah, I wondered what that was." She tilted her head and looked at me curiously.

"It's more like something that isn't." She frowned, confused. "He's had the tattoo removed."

"Wow! I thought the tongue piercing was strange enough!"

I laughed. "So that's what it was! I wasn't watching the screen at that point. Might have been a little keener to actually go and talk to him if I'd known that was there."

"So you two are still together?"

I smiled ironically, thinking of what had occurred not long before. "Most definitely."

I got all my stuff together and headed up a few floors, dropping my stuff off in Mark's room.

"You want something to eat?" he asked as I dropped my bags down.

"Thought I already had." He chuckled and smirked at me. "Room service?" He nodded. "Yeah, could you just order me something? I'm just going to speak to Dave."

Dave frowned at me when he opened his door. It looked like he was getting ready to go out.

"No bottle, I see," he commented, checking both my hands. He held the door open for me to enter. "What happened?"

"We talked. Actually we had a great barnstorming fight."

"That wasn't the idea, Jade." He shook his head slowly.

"I kind of went off on one at him. Actually, no kind of about it. I really went off at him."

"Not very clever where he's concerned. What happened after that?" He sat on his bed and watched me. I was having great trouble keeping a straight face.

"He went off right back at me. Called me a hypocrite. That kind of set me off again, then he started shouting again. And I told him to show some guts, prove he had some balls. Long and short of it is…"

"You're back together, aren't you? You never mess about the point like this when you're pissed off."

I smiled. "Got me. Yes we are. I really owe you one. More than one. You practically own me." I walked over to him and gave him a huge hug before settling next to him on the bed. "I'm sorted, but how about you? We didn't get time to talk earlier."

"Ah, you know how it's been. I'll miss our drinking nights though." He ruffled my hair.

"No you won't. We'll still do it sometimes, just maybe not every other night like the last few days." I looked up at him, a mock stern expression on my face.

"Won't that cause trouble?"

"I don't think so. He wasn't bothered by me coming up here now. Well, not very bothered. And he'd better not be. I'm with him Dave. That doesn't mean he owns me."

"Dangerous talk when you've only just got back with him, isn't it?" he looked at me out of the corner of his eye.

"Maybe it is, but it's far more dangerous to try and be someone you're not. I'm not doing anything wrong. I'm just spending time with a friend. One who really needs his friends at the moment."

He gave me a small smile. "And I appreciate it. It helps, a lot."

"Keeps Tara away from you too" I laughed. "I'd better get back though and see what he ordered me to eat. I'll catch up with you soon." I gave him another hug and left.

A long hot shower followed the dinner from room service. I grabbed the Deadman shirt I had taken to Chicago and pulled it on before I came out. Mark glanced up at me and raised an eyebrow.

"I wondered where that had gone."

"Meh, I have a clothes stealing fetish." I ran a brush through my hair and braided it quickly. I loved having long hair but it was a bitch if I slept with it loose. It went down past my waist and I had been known to put my elbow on it when asleep and nearly break my neck trying to turn over in bed. Putting the brush down I went and sat next to him on the bed, tucking my legs up under me and leaning into his shoulder, propped against the head of the bed.

"What you wearing underneath that shirt?"

"Don't need to wear a lot underneath it. Plenty big enough by itself."

He had taken his shirt off and sat bare-chested on the bed. I snuggled right in to his warm skin, smelling his cologne and the faint hint of leather. My eyes travelled once more to the base of his throat, examining the now bare patch of skin there. Softly I ran a finger over it, almost as if touching it would make it seem more real. Mark just looked down at me quickly and didn't say anything. Propping myself up on one elbow I poked him gently in the ribs.

"Show me again."

"If you insist." Giving me a mocking grin, he slid his hand down to his belt buckle.

"Later. You know exactly what I mean." I prodded him again, slightly less gently this time.

"Ah." He opened his mouth and stuck the tip of his tongue out. I looked at it and shivered. "Want to try it out?" The shivering suddenly got much worse.

Mark removed his arm from round me and pulled the shirt over my head. As I had implied, I wasn't wearing anything underneath it. "I can look at my six favourite pictures."

"Seven," I replied quietly. He was on my left side, so I tilted over onto that side a little more and pointed to my grim reaper. "Less calories than chocolate if you're pissed off." He looked it over and I caught the flicker of recognition when he saw the symbol on the hood. "It's only been done a couple of weeks."

The position he had taken for looking at the tattoo put him at a very interesting level, at least as far as I was concerned. I had wondered in the past what it would be like if he had a tongue piercing. I found out very quickly that it was most definitely a good thing. That little lump of metal on an already talented tongue – well, it has to be experienced to be believed. It was kind of a learning experience for him, but he was definitely a quick learner.

After the time apart we couldn't seem to keep our hands off each other. This was different to what had happened on the stairs at the arena though. That had been pure lust that had been held in check for the time we had been apart. This was more a kind of coupling, really learning about each other physically than about pure power and competition.

We both ended up in the shower, having worked up a real sweat. Of course the combination of Mark and a shower was always going to be good as far as I was concerned as it gave a very good excuse to run my hands all over him. Not that I needed much of an excuse anyway. He decided that he liked the effect of the tongue piercing on me though, and repeated it under the water.

I was leant up against the wall, one leg thrown over his shoulder as he tapped gently with the stud, trying to find the most responsive area to it. If he hadn't had hold of me against the wall with his hands on my hips I would have ended up in a heap on the floor, especially when he took to flicking the tip of his tongue over my clit, turning it slightly every now and again to vary the point at which the metal came into contact. One hand would snake up my body occasionally to tease my nipples or slip down to thrust a couple of fingers deep inside, pumping them rapidly to make my back arch against the wall and open me up further for his mouth. The hot water streamed down over my skin, teasing even further nerve endings that had almost taken as much as they could. And then, when I thought I couldn't possibly take any more, he dropped my leg off his shoulder, stood and lifted me up against the wall, entering swiftly and powering me against the tiles. It was all I could do to wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck and bury my face in his shoulder.

He finally beat me. He finally made me scream.


	18. Chapter 18

I really, really didn't want to move when the alarm went off the next morning. I was tired, warm and drowsy and incredibly comfortable. There was something very familiar about where I was. That something familiar then grunted and shoved me out of the bed.

"Off."

I picked myself up off the ground and wiped the sleep from my eyes. Stumbling haphazardly across the room, I reached the alarm and turned it off. Moving to face the bed, I saw Mark burying himself back under the covers and laughed.

"No you don't, big guy. That alarm is for you as well." The covers moved slightly and one green eye stared out at me. "You've got a photo shoot first thing this morning followed by an autograph session. Price you pay for being away for a month." He groaned and tried to hide again. I solved that problem by simply pulling the covers off the bed. "Come on, up and at 'em."

"You know, you're gonna geth yourthelf in throuble." I stopped dead and looked at him.

"Say what?"

"I thaid, you're gonna geth yourself in throuble." I bit my lip in an attempt not to laugh. It worked too, as my lip was split from the day before and still very sore.

"Is that right?" I turned away and started pulling on clothes. "Not until after you've done the shoot and signing session anyway." I glanced back over my shoulder and saw him working his jaw slightly, feeling that something wasn't quite right. "Mark, how long ago did you get that piercing done?"

"'Bout three weekth. Why?"

"I, er, think it may have been a little soon to use it quite so much. You sound a little off."

"Off?" He looked slightly confused.

"Yeah, it's funny. The Undertaker, six feet ten, from Death Valley and lisping like a little kindergarten kid." I couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing, arms wrapped around my middle. "Oh, you're not going to scare many people today!"

I decided it might be a very good idea to head for the door when he sat up suddenly. He opened his mouth to speak but then seemed to think better of it, glaring at me. Deciding that discretion was definitely the best option I turned the door handle.

"I'll, uh, see you at breakfast." I whipped round the door and out before he could get any closer to getting off the bed.

I still had a wide grin on my face when I got down to the restaurant. I knew full well that he would find a way to make me pay for taking the piss, but it was just too good an opportunity to miss. In fact I thought I might have a word with Karen, as the idea of the Undertaker lisping his way through a mammoth autograph session was just too funny to miss.

Karen was already at breakfast when I got down there. I stopped by her table.

"Hi," she said, glancing up. "You look a bit more cheerful than you have done lately."

"I am," I replied. "I wanted to ask you a bit of a favour."

"Go on."

"Well, I haven't really seen Taker at all over the last month, so I was wondering if you'd let me take him round today. For the pictures and so on."

"What happened to keeping private and professional lives apart?" she asked.

"Like I said, a month apart. I'd really appreciate it."

"Oh well," she sighed. "Who am I to stand in the way of love's young dream? OK, I have plenty of other things to sort out anyway."

"Thanks Karen. I'll catch up with you later." I looked quickly over my shoulder at the door and saw Mark come through it. From the look on his face as he saw me it was clear that I was in trouble. The problem was I had already sorted it that I was going to be with him at least all morning. Worse than that, I knew myself well enough to know that there was no way on earth that I would be able to restrain myself from taking the piss, big time. Resigning myself to my fate I went and sat demurely at a table. I realised my mistake when, instead of sitting opposite me he took the chair next to me, trapping me against the wall. My big mouth certainly wasn't intimidated though.

"You want me to order for you? So the waitress can understand?" I innocently examined the menu, trying to ignore the clenching fist on the table beside me. Maybe it was time to give it a break, just for a little while. It would be far more fun later when there were more people around.

Luckily Tara came over to join us and, with her usual disregard for what any one else may have thought, plonked herself down in the chair opposite me.

"Morning, you guys," she said cheerfully.

"Morning," I replied and glanced sideways at Mark to see what he would do. He simply gave her a nod and cut his eyes in my direction, promising dire retributions. Tara, as was quite normal for her, didn't notice anything up.

"I've been thinking…"

"First time for everything!" I smiled.

"Jade! I've been thinking about my future. I mean, in ten years time I'll be as old as you are now." That sure wiped the smile of my face. I heard a slight chuckle come from the brooding figure on my left side.

"Yeah, just think about how long it'd take her to catch up with you!" I jabbed him gently with my elbow to show I didn't mean it. The age difference between him and me was certainly something I never thought about.

"Would you listen to me?" Tara was getting mildly annoyed at my lack of attention.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry. You have my full attention." I turned to face her fully.

"Well, I'm guessing that you had no idea ten years ago that you would be here now." I snorted and nodded to show her that she was completely right. "So, where do you see yourself ten years from now?"

I sat back and took a deep breath. "Not thought about it. I mean I'll be forty by then. Maybe I'll have settled down a bit more but there are no guarantees."

"Do you think you'll get married? Have kids?"

Mark shifted restlessly next to me. "Jeez, I haven't even been divorced a year! Definitely something I haven't thought about. As for having kids… I've never wanted them in the past. I'm not saying I never would – never say never – but that goes after being married as far as I'm concerned. I can't see myself getting married again but like I said, never say never." I picked up my coffee mug and wrapped my hands round it. "What's brought this on, anyway?"

"Just trying to work out what I want from my life." I nodded again. I remembered going through the same thought processes a few months before, just before I had decided to change everything.

"Didn't think that involved marriage and kids?" I put the cup down and leant my elbows on the table. It hadn't been so long since she had left her husband over that very subject.

"Maybe it was just Jerry that was the problem. I don't know. I love my job but that's not all there is to life, you know?" She shrugged.

"Wrong person to ask, Tara. Some mornings this job has been the only thing getting me out of bed." She rolled her eyes at me. "No, not like that. Recently I've been so busy avoiding my own life that work was all I had to keep me going." I sighed. "Sad but, unfortunately, true." I was a little uncomfortable with the conversation, especially when Mark was sat beside me. Talking about long-term plans for your life while sitting next to the man you had just got back together with didn't come high on my list of favourite things to do.

"I don't think I could ever get like that," she said, eyeing me doubtfully.

"Yeah, well I didn't think I could either. Just goes to show that you never know until you're there. Speaking of being there, we should get a move on." I turned to Mark who shrugged and got up. "See you later, Tara."

The benefits of being the champion included a limo to personal appearances if they were being done solo and it took us to the shoot as well. Mark was being particularly uncommunicative, but then I wasn't too surprised given how he was talking.

The photos were great. He was a real pro at this game and knew exactly what was wanted both of the shots with the belt and without. The stare that could go right through you really came through on the shots and they looked fantastic. We were away in plenty of time to get to the personal appearance.

As always there was a huge mass of people waiting. There was a store nearby and I slipped away to it once he was settled. Taking a small amount of pity on him I got some ice and crushed it, opening a bottle of water and putting some inside, figuring it should help with the swelling. Heading back to the centre where he was I waited until there was a small gap in between fans to put it down next to him.

"Try drinking that. It may help." He barely looked at me, concentrating on the job in hand. I took a couple of steps away from the table so that I was close enough to see if he wanted anything but not infringing on the fan's time. Standing alongside the queue of fans, I talked to a few of them as they were waiting. Of course, many of them wanted to talk to him. Being the professional that he was, he would always reply. Every time he did I would have to look away and cover my face to hide the stupid grin that popped up. I could tell he noticed as he was throwing me dark glances every now and again.

Moving slightly further down the waiting line I hatched a plan. Talking to as many fans as possible I encouraged them all to talk to him and ask him lots of questions. There was no way he would refuse to answer. Every time he did I had to bite my lip, hard. It was getting so that my stomach muscles were killing me from keeping the laughter in. The final straw came when two young women, maybe in their early twenties, walked away from the table after seeing him, shaking their heads sadly.

"Poor guy. I never realised he had such a bad speech impediment. Doesn't really go, does it?" I thought for a moment that I was going to have to leave the room as the laughter was bubbling so close to the surface. That changed pretty quickly though when he beckoned me over. Slightly nervous, I made my way to him and bent slightly over his shoulder. He held up the empty water bottle.

"You want another one?" I asked. He nodded and leant over to speak directly in my ear.

"Pack it in." He glared at me for a second before turning his attention back to the task in hand. I retreated and got him more water, adding more ice. Maybe it was time to stop as he had looked pretty serious. With his temperament it was probably best not too push him too far. That is, unless I had already. I took his water to him and then backed away, putting myself somewhere I could avoid temptation as much as possible.

With more lip chewing I managed to restrain myself for most of the rest of the session. In fact I was doing really well until the person that ran the venue came over to me as the end of the queue finally came into sight.

"It's gone well," he said, leaning against the wall beside me. "Must get a bit samey for these guys though."

"To an extent, I suppose," I agreed. "On the whole they thoroughly enjoy interacting with the fans."

"Shame we can't do anything to make it a bit more unique, a bit more memorable," he commented, shaking his head.

I have no idea what prompted me to say what I did next. Actually, I do. It was the amusement factor, pure and simple. I knew Mark had told me to pack it in, but following instruction wasn't my best skill at times, especially if there could be a laugh involved.

"Tell, you what, when the last fan has gone through, announce that he'd like to say a few words. Surprise them. He won't refuse." I glanced back over to Mark. He was throwing looks my way every now and again, suspicious of the slight grin I could feel on my face. It was too late now though as the venue manager was getting into position to make his announcement.

As he spoke, Mark's eyes turned directly to me. I fought so hard to keep a straight face, but failed totally. When he got up and started to speak I had to leave. It was just too much.

It seemed to take forever for him to come out but finally we climbed back into the limo and headed back for the hotel. Half of the ride was taken in silence, Mark gazing out of the window beside him. Feeling slightly uneasy with the lack of conversation I tried an opening remark.

"How does the swelling feel?" He shrugged and grunted. It was pretty much what I had expected. I was a little suspicious then when a small smile lifted the corners of his mouth and he turned in the seat to face me.

"Better." He was starting to sound a little more normal. "The rest of the afternoon is free, ithn't it?" OK, only a little more normal.

"Yes, there's nothing else down until we move on. Why, you got something planned?"

"Hmm, I thought I might get some pieces touched up." He glanced down at his arms. "Feel like coming along? You might find thomething to take your fancy."

"Sure," I shrugged. "I'm getting very unbalanced between my sides. I could do with some more on my left."

After a quick bit of checking back at the hotel Mark found a place he was happy with so we jumped in his rental and headed off. While he talked over what he wanted done I flicked through some designs, trying to see if there was something that caught my eye. I had a slight fascination for Celtic things and an endless knot design really leapt out at me. As soon as I saw it I knew it was the one for the back of my left shoulder.

"Found something?" Mark's voice behind me suddenly made me jump.

"Oh, yeah." I showed him the design.

"Come on then." He picked the page out of my hand and went to talk to the tattoo artist. Shortly afterwards I was sat in the chair feeling the burning sensation as the needle moved over my skin.

When asked if getting tattoos was painful I had always replied 'not really'. It was more of an intense heat than anything else. My shoulders had been the only ones that had been different. The vibrations over the bone were really annoying and I had to stop myself from constantly shifting away from the feeling.

It took about an hour and a half to complete and I worked the cricks out of my neck as a dressing was applied over the newly done area. I had always been lucky in that I didn't bleed much from any of the tattoos I had got in the past. Ben had bled like a stuck pig with one of his and it had taken an hour in a warm bath to get the dressing off him then.

It took a while longer for Mark to finish up. He handed over some money to the guy. I reckoned it must have been an expensive place, as there seemed to be quite a lot of money handed over. I had by now given up offering to pay for things much as it nearly always got the same result as it had the first time I had done so.

Mark seemed much more cheerful as we got back in the car and headed to the hotel. I had no idea what had brought about the improvement in mood but was glad to see it. I had been a little worried that I had annoyed him by taking the piss in public, and in hindsight suggesting to the venue manager that he should address the fans might not have been the brightest idea I had ever had. Damn funny though.

It was a quiet evening really. I was still fairly tired from not sleeping much the night before and my shoulder was a little sore. We were due to move into Missouri the next day. I decided to call my brother, as it was only a week until we were due to be his way. Todd answered the phone.

"'Lo?"

"Hey Todd. How're you doing?"

"Hi, Aunt Jade. Yeah, I'm good. You want Dad?"

"Please." I settled back against the wall, wincing slightly when my sore shoulder rubbed. Mark cast a quick glance at me and grinned. I was puzzled by the expression on his face, almost as if he knew something I didn't.

"Hi sis," Andy said, picking up the phone. "You feeling better?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. All sorted." I smiled at the inquisitive noise he made but didn't answer. He lost patience after only a few seconds.

"Well, are you with him or not?"

"That's right," I replied cryptically. He and I had always played games of understanding. He drove me insane when he did it.

"Just answer the question!"

"OK, OK, yes."

"When are you getting here?" he asked, changing the subject.

"Uh, Sunday night. You're coming to the taping on Tuesday, right?"

"Yep," he agreed. "Jenny thought about coming too. Wants me to take her out for a meal or something like that. I did try to tell her that it wouldn't be easy with the kids but…"

"You could leave them with me for an hour or so. Give me a key and I'd take them home for you. I'm still OK for staying with you?" Mark frowned slightly as I said that, but I waved a hand at him. This was my brother and I would take every opportunity to see him I could while I was near him.

"We'll talk more about it when you're here. You want picking up again?"

"No. I'll have to get a car so I can get to the arena. I'll call you when we get to the hotel and I've finished up with everything. Right now I'm going to crash." I stretched and tried to stifle a yawn.

"OK, sis. See you next week."

"You're staying with him?" Mark asked as I put the phone down. He was starting to sound much better now. It was quite a relief as I really didn't think that laughing at him any more would be a good idea and I knew there was no way on earth that I would be able to hold it in.

"Yeah. I probably won't get to see him until Christmas after this, and that's only if he invites me up then. I don't have the room for them to come and visit me so I'm going to make the most of it while I can. I'll be over to the arena every day though." He jerked his head, slightly placated. "I'm going to get some sleep."

The move into Missouri went smoothly. Everyone got to where they were supposed to be with no problems. Yet again that night I was totally shattered and had that horrible familiar cramping feeling in my stomach. Past experience told me that getting cramps this early meant I was in for a couple of days of monster PMS.

The next day I was in catering getting an early start on the lists for the move up to Illinois. I wanted it all to go through as quickly as possible so I could spend more time with Andy and his family. As was fairly normal Tara came in to get a coffee and wandered over to peek over my shoulder.

"Hey," she said, leaning against the back of my chair.

"Hi Tara." I pushed the papers away and stretched, grimacing at the wave of pain that lanced across my stomach. "I could do with a break right now. Mark's practicing so I might wander down there in a minute."

"What's this? Got another tattoo?" She gently touched the dressing that was still on my shoulder and poking out for under the strap of my top. Mark had changed it for me the day before as I had bled a little this time.

"Yeah. That dressing should be able to come off now. Take it off for me?" I could feel her wincing as she peeled it off. She really was quite squeamish. "How does it look?" I asked her as I felt it come free.

"Umm, all right I guess," she said doubtfully. "Different for you I suppose."

I frowned. "Different? I've already got a Celtic tattoo any way, on my arm."

"Er, it's definitely not Celtic. I think there's been some sort of mix up. And the writing…"

My head came up rapidly. "Writing? What the hell does it say?"

"Umm, I'm not sure I want to tell you?"

"How bad can it be?" I asked, twisting round to look at her. Her face looked as if she was torn between laughter and abject fear.

"Tell you what," she suggested after we stared each other out for a few seconds, "I'll take a picture on my phone and show you. No mistakes that way."

"OK," I replied doubtfully. She was starting to worry me. I heard the click as she took the picture, and then waited impatiently as she pushed the buttons to bring the image up. She handed me the phone and then took two very quick steps backwards as I looked at it.

I think that I may have shaken the foundations of the entire arena as I stood up so quickly my chair shot over backwards. People all around catering were looking at me but I barely noticed as one thought pounded through my brain. To find him. To find him and rip him limb from miserable bloody limb. I span on my feet and strode towards the door. Slamming it open with my hand I stepped through and bellowed one word down the hallway.

"CALAWAY!"

People poked their heads out or stepped out into the hallway to see what the commotion was all about as I stormed down the corridor, shouting for him every now and again. Glen tried to stand in front of me, to see what the matter was. I pushed him out of the way and kept on going, mowing down anyone else that came between that ringside and me. Finally I got to the top of the ramp and stood at the edge of the stage.

"CALAWAY! Get your sorry arse up here now!"

He turned in the ring, an angry look on his face. He didn't like being shouted at like that. Well, tough shit because he was about to get his ass handed to him. When he didn't move, I stalked down the ramp, up the steps and through the ropes into the ring.

"What the fuck gives you the right to do something like this?" I brandished the phone at him. Maybe it's time to describe to you what had actually been inked on my shoulder. Thumper, the baby rabbit out of Bambi. All fluffy, cute and wide eyed. That was bad enough. The writing was far, far worse. I'd never had writing put on before. I was never very keen on it. And if I had ever chosen some words to be etched into my skin, these really weren't the ones I would ever have chosen. In a little circle round that dumb fucking rabbit were the words 'Mark's Snuggle Bunny'. I know, if it had happened to somebody else I would have found it absolutely hysterical. I stood there in front of him, damn nearly eighteen inches shorter than him, one hand holding the offending picture out to him while the other one was clenched into a fist at my side.

"What can I say, darlin'? Don't play with me 'cos I'm meaner than you could ever believe. That was a dumb thing you did." I dropped the phone on the mat and stepped right up to him, having to crane my neck up to look him in the eye.

"As dumb as getting your name written on someone without their permission? You know bloody well what I think about that! Never mind the rest of the shit that's there." I was really leaning into him and screaming full force. PMS at its raging best.

"Wait just a minute," he started. I jabbed a finger into his chest and started up all over again.

"Shut it. Just shut the fuck up. I know that speech thing was stupid but it didn't leave a permanent fucking mark, did it? I should rip your fucking balls off for this." With every word I was poking his chest and, as the volume rose, he started to step back, looking a little uneasy now. "You ever, and I do mean ever, do anything this stupid again and I will make sure you pay through this life and into the next, Deadman or not. Do I make myself fucking clear enough?" He was in the corner by this stage and I was standing right up on tiptoes to shout at him. "You bribed the tattoo artist, didn't you? I thought it was a lot of money just for what we had done. Now I know why. How dare you? How fucking dare you?" I ran out of coherent words and just stared at him for a few seconds, breathing heavily. The expression on his face was one I'd never seen before and would be hard pushed to describe. If made to think of a word off the top of my head, I would have to say apprehension, almost fear. I glared at him for a few more moments before picking Tara's phone up, turning and stalking out of the ring.

"It's your own fault," he shot out as I reached the bottom of the ramp.

I ground to a halt and spun round to face the ring once more. "That fucking does it." What came next was a little blurry in my memory, but I know I completely lost it. The next thing I remember was being in the ring with one of those steel chairs in my hands, swinging at him. I was like a woman possessed, hunting him around that space. As quick as he was, I have no idea how I held him there for as long as I did. I vaguely heard someone shouting and glanced in that direction. Mark took advantage of my attention being elsewhere and slipped out of the ring, heading up the ramp at high speed.

"She's gone nuts!" I heard him call. Growling with rage, I slipped under the bottom rope, still carrying my chair. I got no more than half a dozen strides up the ramp when my arms were pinned to my sides and the chair removed from my grip.

"Come on. I'm taking you somewhere to calm down." I looked from side to side. Glen had one arm while Dave had the other. They quite literally dragged me into an empty locker room and shut me in there, telling me I could come out when I had calmed down. It happened… eventually. After about half an hour I stopped throwing things and Dave was brave enough to poke his head round the door.

"You safe yet?"

"As I'm gonna be." I was still pacing the room but had calmed down from the stage of wrecking things.

"Are you going to play nice if I come in there?"

I sighed. "You're safe enough. Just keep him away from me for a while."

"What did he do?" Dave asked, coming in and closing the door. I just turned my back to him and pulled the strap of my top to one side.

"Laugh and you are history," I tossed back over the other shoulder as I heard the intake of breath.

"He's inventive, have to give him that." I put the strap back and turned to see Dave trying hard to keep a straight face. "Come on Jade, it does have a funny side."

"Maybe if it was just the picture. It's just that he knows exactly what I think about people's names like that." I collapsed into a chair.

"What made him do it, anyway?"

"Well, you know he got his tongue pierced?" Dave nodded. "It swelled up again."

"Why? Doesn't happen unless you… Oh!" He stopped again and shot me a grin. "Like that, huh?"

"Shut it! I found it kind of funny when he started lisping. And he had a session today. I might have kind of suggested to the venue manager that he announce that Taker wanted to say a few words." I rolled my eyes and looked over at him. "There were these two girls that walked off saying how sad it was and that they'd never noticed he had a speech impediment."

Dave winced. "You do realise that is going to be all over the internet by now?"

I bit my lip. "Guess I never thought of that. Still a bit different to this though."

"Hmm, I suppose. You safe to go back out there now?" He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it gently.

"Yeah, perfectly safe."

"I think that picture might stay with me for a long time though. The Deadman running from this little thing swinging a chair like a woman possessed." He chuckled as he opened the door.

I got all the way back to catering before I stopped mumbling dire threats under my breath. Bursting back through the door, I threw Tara's phone to here and returned to my chair, picking it up off the ground and sitting down. Shuffling the papers in front of me on the table, I returned to my task, almost as if nothing had happened.

I had just about finished when the doors opened at the other end of catering. There had been a buzz of conversation around the room but that died away quickly. I glanced up to see what the cause of the sudden silence was and saw Mark watching me warily. He took a sudden step forward, almost as if he was pushed from behind. He had been – I saw the arm as it slipped back out of sight. Putting my pen down I watched him walk towards me, eyes moving from side to side as if checking for a quick getaway. He reached the table and stopped, opening and closing his fists by his sides.

"I'm told you're a little more safe now." I tipped my head back so I could meet his gaze.

"A little."

"I'm supposed to apologise."

I snorted. "Not going to though, are you?" A flicker of annoyance crossed his features. "Wouldn't expect anything else from you."

"I'll take you to get it covered up if you want me too." He ground it out and I guessed that Dave might have attempted to talk him into this.

"I never saw a cover up job I liked to be honest. I suppose I'll learn to live with it." My manner was still stiff but the stomach pains were too bad to sustain any real anger at anything else. "Truce?" He relaxed slightly. "You're not forgiven, not by a long shot, but your balls are safe for the moment."

"Truce," he agreed finally.


	19. Chapter 19

The next couple of days were interesting to say the least. I still had a bad bout of PMS, and Mark really wasn't quite sure how to handle me after the in-ring episode. I did decide that I would take him up on the cover up offer, at least as far as the writing round the tattoo went. That could be done easily. Thumper I would just learn to live with. Maybe get some kind of predator done to hunt him. Whatever, it was going to take a while before anything could be done. The area had to settle down and heal properly before I was going to let anyone near it. One thing was for sure though – I was going to get the money from Mark and leave him behind. There was no way on earth that he was ever going to be in the same place as me when I was having another tattoo done.

I was impatient for our time in Missouri to be done. I had been so caught up in my own miseries last time in Chicago that I hadn't really had as much time for my family as I would have liked. I was determined that it would be different this time and that I was going to have as much fun with them as I possibly could.

The whole dynamic of my relationship with Mark seemed to have tilted slightly in that past couple of days. I suppose there had been a little bit of fear on my side, the remnants of awe at who he was. That seemed to have gone completely now I had stood up to him. I felt more of an equal now, more comfortable with my role in the partnership.

On the third day I woke up feeling pretty damn good at the world. The cramps were much better and the PMS had gone, leaving me with my normal much sunnier disposition. As was usual, I had woken up before Mark. Those last three nights had been spent sleeping on opposite sides of the bed but we were both too stubborn to mention anything about changing rooms.

He looked very different when he was sleeping. Whenever he was off his feet he was nowhere near as physically intimidating but there was a softness about him in repose that was never there at any other time. It was something that no one else saw. If I didn't have to get up I would sometimes just lie there and watch him sleeping for a while and did so that morning.

"If you're looking for the spot to kill me, do it quietly. Some of us are still trying to sleep." He opened one eye and stared at me. Chuckling, I scooted over towards him and nudged his arm out of the way so I could snuggle in.

"More sleep sounds good." I rested my head in the curve of his shoulder and sighed contentedly.

"You feeling all right, baby girl?" I lifted my head slightly.

"What did you call me?"

"Baby girl. You gonna get pissy about that too?"

"No, I just never heard that before. I don't usually inspire people to call me names like that." He shifted his weight and winced a little. "Bad this morning, huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"Your hips are playing you up. Come on, Mark. I see you wake up nearly every morning. You can't hide it from me." I leant up on one elbow.

"I don't want your pity," he growled.

"Does it sound like you're getting it? Get your ass out of bed and have a hot shower. Might take the edge of your grumpiness too." I shifted to the side, freeing his arm. He glared at me for a few seconds and then pushed himself out of the bed. When I did get up after him this was always one of the advantages – watching him walk across the room, the play of muscles in his back and legs. A relatively cheap thrill but it worked for me.

I had dozed off again during the time he was in the shower. That was fairly unusual for me these days but then again I had never been a morning person by choice. Mark had obviously decided that my insanity had been temporary and that it was safe to annoy me again as I was woken by a wet towel being dumped on my head.

"Shift. You are not going back to sleep." I pushed the damp material from my face and tried his own glare back on him. All he did was laugh.

"Come on, baby girl. Rise and shine." I mustered a snarl and hauled myself out of the bed.

He was dressed and waiting for me when I came out of the shower and watched me as I got dressed. Once done I sat on the end of the bed next to him. He leaned over and lifted the silver chain round my neck on one finger.

"Why do you wear that? I'm guessing that guy in Florida gave it to you."

I nodded. "That's right. I always wondered if I had made the right decision leaving him. It was like keeping a part of him with me even though I knew I couldn't go back. Now, it's just habit I guess. I've worn it for so long I would feel wrong without it." I glanced up at him. "Why?"

"Now I know the story behind it I don't much like you wearing it." I bristled, ready to make some sharp remark but he held up a hand to stop me. "It ain't so very different from my tattoo, is it?"

I had to admit he had a point although I didn't like the idea of taking it off. Like I had said, I had been wearing it for so long it felt like a part of me now. I looked into his eyes for a moment and then my gaze flickered down to the bare skin of his throat. He had done that for me and it must have been fairly uncomfortable. What was removing a necklace compared to that? I reached up and undid the clasp, bundling the heavy silver in my palm. For something that I had claimed didn't mean anything to me now it felt like a momentous event, as if I was shedding my past. I looked at it sitting in my hand and took a deep breath. Shifting my eyes towards him I saw a strange look in his eyes, as if he had understood what I had just been thinking. It did make me wonder what his thought processes had been when he had gone to get that tattoo removed. I'll admit to being seriously curious about what had happened between him and Sara as well. Although the only way I would find that out was if he volunteered to tell me. No way was I going to ask about it.

"There you go." I stood up and deposited the chain in the pocket of my holdall. He had a slight smile on his face when I turned back to him. Standing, he walked over to his stuff and dug about in his bag.

"I've got something for you. I never gave you anything for your birthday, did I?"

I had to think for a moment. "I guess not. Things were a bit messed up around then though."

He nodded his agreement. "And you kept it pretty quiet. So, it's a little late but here it is." He handed me a flat box. It was obviously a piece of jewellery, a necklace of some description by the size. I opened it and stared at the contents. It was a Celtic knot necklet with a heavy chain in a pale metal.

"God, Mark! It's beautiful." I picked it up out of the box to examine more closely. "Is it silver?"

He shook his head. "Platinum. Give it here." I handed it over and he turned me round, putting the chain round my neck and fastening it. "I thought it would suit you."

"Platinum's expensive," I frowned. The raised eyebrow told me that was the wrong thing to say. "I mean, I love it but…"

"But what?" He sounded clearly annoyed so I decided to try and defuse the situation.

"But you are still not forgiven." He rolled his eyes and laughed before walking towards the bathroom. His phone rang on the other side of the room and I walked over to pick it up. "Hey, your phone's ringing!" I called.

"Answer it for me would ya?" he yelled through the door.

"OK." I pushed the button without bothering to look at the screen. "Hello?" There was just silence from the other end. "Hello?" I tried again.

"Who is this?" An irate female voice came through.

I was taken aback. "I could ask the same thing."

"I'm trying to reach my husband so why the hell are you answering his phone?" It clicked into place in my mind.

"This is Sara, right?"

"Damn right it is! Where the hell is Mark?"

"He can't take the phone right now." I heard an angry snort come from her.

"Why are you answering his phone, anyway? What are you, his assistant or something?"

"Because he asked me too. And no, I'm not his assistant." I clenched my free hand into a fist. Just speaking to her was enough to get me riled up.

Mark finally came out of the bathroom and gave me a questioning look. I took the phone away from my ear.

"It's Sara." He frowned and held out his hand. I shrugged and passed the phone over.

"Sara, what do you want?" I knew that no nonsense tone of voice. He had little patience in a situation he didn't want to be in and it was perfectly clear to me that this was one. I made to step away, giving him some privacy but her jerked his head to stop me.

"We've been through this, Sara. It's too damn late. My life has moved on. It's about time you dealt with that." He paused and I could hear the vague noise of her voice. The frown line in between his eyes was deepening with every word until he spoke again. "That ain't my fault. You made the decision, that was what you wanted. Never mind what I thought about it. You know that doesn't sit well with me."

"I'm going to go," I mouthed to him. He shook his head and pointed for me to sit down. I did so, hearing the rising volume of Sara's voice coming from the phone.

"Yes, that was her. Why the hell do you need to know her name?" He glanced at me, looking annoyed. "OK, her name is Jade." He paused as she spoke again. "Because I was in the damn bathroom." He stopped again to let her speak and I saw his face become truly angry. "Don't threaten me, Sara. You know you don't want to do that." He rubbed a hand down over his face. "What do you think you are going to do?" I heard her voice come out quite loud one final time and then he took the phone from his ear, staring at it. "She hung up."

"What did she want?"

"Same as before. It's different this time though. She was making threats." He stopped abruptly, putting his face in his hands.

"What kind of threats?" I shifted closer and put a hand on his arm.

"That I won't get to see my daughter ever again unless I go back to her." The sheer cruelty of what she was doing left me speechless.

Of course I knew that Mark had a kid. There were pictures in his home. During the time we had been seeing each other he had frequently found time to go and visit his little girl. Since he and Sara had divorced he had visited with his daughter when she was being looked after by a friend to avoid any trouble that might have cropped up if they had come face to face. We had never really talked about them. That part of his life had been separate from the part that involved me.

"She can't do that, Mark. She can't do anything to hurt us. Don't let her get to you. The only way she could stop you seeing your daughter was if you were a bad father and I can't see that being the case." He turned to me and wrapped his arms round my shoulders.

"I hope you're right."

All in all it made for a subdued few days before we headed towards Illinois. Mark was as quiet as I had ever seen him. She'd really hit below the belt with her threats and no matter how much he tried not to worry about it he just couldn't ignore it. I supposed it was to do with being a parent, something I had never known. If I'm honest it was something I had never wanted to know anything about. Seeing the state of Mark certainly didn't change my mind either.

I was only going to be with my brother for two nights. The day after the show we were due to move on and head up towards Canada for a short while. The move from Missouri up was the normal brand of vaguely organised chaos. One bag was mislaid, one person nearly missed the flight and one was nearly kicked off the flight for arguing with a flight attendant. Par for the course on the whole. The hotel wasn't much better. There had been a mix up in reservations and there was a room short. Luckily Dave came to my rescue and agreed to share, solving the problem for me.

Finally it was all done and I could think about making the drive to my brother's place. I wanted to see Mark before I left and wandered up to his room. He was still worrying me a little, being as unsettled as he was.

"You OK?" I asked when he opened his door. He looked tired and I knew he hadn't been sleeping very well. In reply he just shrugged and drew me inside the room, leaning his chin on my head and circling my waist with his arms.

"I don't want you to go, baby girl." He sighed deeply. "I don't want to be alone." It was almost funny. Here was this guy, not far off seven feet tall and tugging at my heartstrings like a little boy.

"Why don't you come back with me tomorrow night? Give me a chance to run it by Andy? Although I'm sure he won't care. That means it's just for one night. Then you get to be in the middle of a crazy family." I heard his faint laugh.

"All right, for one night then." He stepped back a little and brushed a kiss over my forehead. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Miracle of miracles, I didn't get lost driving out to the house. For possibly the first time ever I managed to avoid taking a single wrong turning and drew up on their driveway just about in time for dinner. The kids were still up and already incredibly hyper about the following evening. I had a quiet word with Andy and he agreed that Mark was more than welcome to come and chance his luck for the night. We also agreed that I would take the kids after the show and bring them home, allowing Andy and Jenny to go out after the show and spend some time alone.

It was a really pleasant evening. I was in better spirits than last time I had been there, although still worrying a little over Mark. I got roped into telling Ellie a bedtime story once all of her dolls had been safely stowed out of sight and then sat watching a movie, sipping red wine and chatting with Andy and Jenny. He found the bunny tattoo absolutely hilarious and kept randomly bursting out with the words 'snuggle bunny.' I was finally able to see the funny side of it as well although still ended up chucking some cushions at his head. It was far too late really when I went to bed considering I had to get up and drive to the arena the following morning.

I felt the effects of the late night and the wine when the alarm went off the following morning. Not helped in the slightest by the fact that shortly after the alarm started buzzing I was landed on by two hyperactive children. They seemed convinced by their childhood logic that the sooner I was up and gone, the sooner they would be coming to the arena. It made perfect sense to them at least. I dragged myself out of bed and into the shower, muttering about out of control children.

The drive to the arena wasn't quite as successful as the one the night before had been. I had to stop to consult the map twice and ask for directions once. I still managed to get there not long after I had intended to.

It was a standard sort of show day. Dave seemed a little down and I made a mental note to try and have an evening with him in the next town we visited. He looked like he could do with something to cheer him up. Mark seemed a little more himself as well, laughing and cracking jokes as I watched him practice in the ring.

Tara seemed to think she knew what was up with Dave. According to the gossip things were going from bad to worse in his marriage and the theory was that it wouldn't be long before she would divorce him. I decided that I definitely had to spend some time with him soon.

It was a good show. The crowd were really into it and some of the signs were incredibly funny. I kept an eye out on the monitor for my family and thought I spotted Todd at one point although I couldn't really be sure. As the show drew to an end I made my way out to meet up with them and collect the kids.

"There you go!" Andy said, handing me a key to his house. "Now, you kids behave yourself and do as you are told. Thanks sis." He turned back to me and gave me a smile.

"No problem. I promise not to let them beat anybody up!" I laughed, shepherding the two hopelessly overexcited children towards the backstage door.

They had a great time wandering round backstage and meeting some of the guys. Ellie seemed totally in awe of the Divas and they were on the whole quite sweet to her, although I kept her away from Annie on purpose. She went a bit quieter when it came to meeting the male wrestlers. She wasn't very big, even for her age and found them a bit intimidating. I couldn't actually get her near Glen for about ten minutes although she seemed to be reasonably happy with anyone else we came near and took a real liking to Dave. That surprised me a bit as he was amongst the biggest there. There was obviously something about him she liked. It was starting to get late though and I wanted to meet up with Mark before heading back to Andy's place.

"Come on you guys," I called. "One more person to meet before we head home." Threading my way through the people that were in the hallways I led them to Mark's locker room and knocked on the door. "You in there, Taker?"

"Sure, Jade. Come on in." I opened the door and ushered the two kids inside. Mark was sat on a chair and stood up to say hi as we went in. Todd just stopped and looked up at him. Ellie on the other hand squeaked and hid behind my leg.

"Ellie, come out of there." I reached back and tried to pull her round to the front of me. Somehow she managed to turn it into climbing up my leg and sitting on my hip, face hidden in my neck. "Ellie, what's the matter?" She whispered something I didn't quite catch. "What was that?" She whispered again, into my ear that time and I had to fight the laughter that threatened to overwhelm me. "Ellie, I'm sure he's not going to hurt you." I took a couple of steps towards Mark but stopped and backed up quickly when she started to cry loudly. I looked at Mark and rolled my eyes.

"Hey darlin'" he said softly. Taking a couple of steps towards us he motioned for me to put Ellie on the floor. I did, after a little difficulty getting her arms from around my neck. Mark knelt down to get closer to her level. "I won't hurt you. I promise." Ellie took her face away from my leg and looked at him uncertainly, sniffling occasionally. I saw Todd move and turned to see what he was up to, spinning back round when Ellie screamed.

What I saw was Mark doing his very best Taker, eyes rolled right back up into his head. I could tell where the idea had come from as I could hear Todd laughing so hard he nearly couldn't stand up.

"Jesus, Mark. Grow up would you! Todd, shut it or we are going home right now!" I picked Ellie up again and tried to quieten her down. "Just remember what made her like this when she screams the whole way home."

Todd stopped laughing and a thoughtful expression came over his face. "You are Mark?" he asked.

"Sure am," Mark replied, getting back to his feet.

Todd frowned slightly. "You made Aunt Jade cry."

I span round to look at him. "You were supposed to be outside."

"The window was open. Dad always forgets to shut it."

"That true?" Mark asked me quietly.

"Don't get over excited about it. Seems like a long time ago now. We should think about heading home soon, you guys." I put Ellie back down as she had stopped shaking now.

"Give me five minutes and I'll be ready," Mark said.

"OK. We'll meet you by the car." I shepherded the two kids out of the building and round to where the car was parked. Todd was still looking thoughtful.

"Aunt Jade, why is the Undertaker going to meet us here?"

"Because he's coming home with us." Ellie's eyes went wide and she shook her head violently, tears appearing in the corners of her eyes again.

"Cool!" Todd burst out. "Can I invite my friends round to meet him?"

"No! He is not going to be there just to be paraded round in front of your friends. Ellie, stop it. He is not going to hurt you and if he does that thing with his eyes again I'll make him stop."

"Is he your boyfriend?" Todd asked in an annoying juvenile singsong voice.

"Yes, Todd, I guess you could call him that." I sighed. It was easy to forget how annoying kids could be sometimes.

"I like him," he pronounced gravely.

"You would. Mainly because of him scaring your sister I suspect." It was very easy to tell that Mark was approaching at that point. Ellie went rigid and grabbed hold of my leg. I opened the car door, putting the key in the ignition, and told Todd to get inside. Before I knew what had happened, Ellie had shot in the car and pressed the central locking button, leaving Todd and me stood outside, mouths hanging open.

"Can't you just use the key?" Todd asked.

"It's in the ignition. Ellie, open the door." She sat back and shook her head. "You can't sit in there all night. Unlock the car." She shook her head again and her eyes went wide as she looked behind me.

"Problem?" I turned to Mark and sighed.

"She's locked herself in. She's absolutely bloody terrified of you. The keys are in the damn ignition so we're stuck." I stared up towards the night sky, thinking the long line of swear words I felt like shouting out loud.

"I have an idea," Mark said after a few seconds thought. We walked slightly off to one side and he told me what he had come up with. I agreed it had to be worth a try. He went off a little way and crouched down to rifle through his bag as if looking for something.

"Ellie, listen to me," I said when I got back to the car. "There's something I need you to do for me." She stopped wriggling around and looked at me. "I can't do it myself. I'm too big." She nodded slightly for me to continue. "You see, there's a special button on the Undertaker's arm that turns all the evil off and makes him just Mark. But someone needs to sneak up behind him and press it. Todd and I are too big. You are the only one that can do it. Once you press that button, all the bad will go away. Think you can do it?"

She looked at me, bottom lip poking out as she thought, glancing constantly between Mark and me. "OK," she mouthed eventually.

"All right sweetie, open the door now and I'll tell you where the button is." So very slowly her hand moved forward to the door handle and she opened it just a crack. "OK, Ellie. Do you know your left from your right? Which is your right arm?" She held up the correct arm. "Well, if you look at the side of his right arm there's like a face there with its hand on its chin. All you have to do is touch that and it'll all be OK." She nodded once more, bottom lip trembling again but started to tiptoe her way slowly across the asphalt. I sensed rather than saw Todd open his mouth and clapped a hand over it to silence whatever smartass comment he was about to come out with to frighten his sister further.

Ellie glanced back once as she got really close to Mark. I saw his head move slightly to the left to allow her to look round his arm without thinking she had been seen. She edged ever so gently round his side and saw the thinking demon on his bicep. I saw her take a deep breath and prod it with a finger before jumping back, shocked at just how brave she had been.

Mark let his shoulders drop and his head came up. He looked towards Ellie with a grin on his face.

"Hey, Ellie! How are you? I'm Mark." Ellie looked back at me, a little confused. I gave her a thumbs up and she turned back to face Mark again, head cocked on one side.

"Are you nice or evil now?" I heard her ask in a quiet little voice.

"I'm definitely nice, little one. Now I think we should get in that car before we get in trouble with your Aunt Jade, don't you?" I looked on amazed as he held out a hand to her and she took it, not even flinching when he stood up and led her towards the car. I shook my head disbelievingly at him when he shot me a victorious little grin. After that it didn't take long to install the two children in the back seat and start on the drive back.

"That was really sweet, you know," I said once the kids were happily fighting amongst themselves.

"Don't go shouting about it though," he growled, prodding me on the thigh with a finger.

The kids were sent to bed as soon as we got back. I found some beer in Andy's fridge and we settled down on the couch in front of the TV for a while. It made a nice change to be on our own together somewhere that wasn't a hotel room or locker room for a change.

Andy and Jenny got back around one in the morning. Jenny had clearly had a few drinks and was very giggly. They didn't really know how to handle the fact that there was a famous person sat in their living room, drinking their beer and watching their TV. I suppose I still had attacks of excitement about the people I worked with but enough time had gone by now for me to be used to it on the whole. I found it a little embarrassing coming from my family. Especially from Andy. I had expected awkwardness from my mother when she found out the relationship between Mark and me but somehow not from my oldest brother. Consequently it wasn't very long before we decided to go to bed.

Not having kids myself, I never thought about things like locking bedroom doors. Hence, when the kids came barrelling in to jump on me the next morning I wasn't sure who got more of a shock, them or Mark.

In hindsight it was really incredibly funny. Both kids had leapt on the bed and obviously had woken Mark from quite a deep sleep as he shot up in bed, nearly knocking them on the floor. The children stared at him in shock for a moment. Ellie took in his normal grumpy morning expression and bounded over to him, slapping him firmly on the arm.

"There you go, Aunt Jade," she announced proudly. "I've turned him off!" I had to hide under the covers as hysterical laughter bubbled up at the look on his face. I emerged after a few seconds, grinning widely.

"Thank you, Ellie. Now, how about you go down to the kitchen and we'll be down for breakfast soon."

Jenny wasn't up for breakfast, feeling the effects of the wine she had drunk the night before. I had to make do with sitting in between Todd and Andy as the two children had firmly placed themselves on either side of Mark at the table. Ellie chatted away to him through the whole meal and insisted on dragging him out to meet Widget, the little grey pony.

We weren't due to leave until late afternoon to move to the next site so I decided that I would get the cover up job done on that damn writing. It was a bit soon really, but I was a fast healer. Andy had a couple of tattoos that he had got since being over in Chicago so I got the details of the place where he had gone. I relented on the idea of not even allowing Mark in the place but made him stay in the waiting area while the work was being done. It didn't take very long to get an endless knot patterned border round the rabbit to cover up the writing. I had changed my mind on one point of the job though.

"Let me have a look?" Mark asked when we got back in the car. I just turned my back to him for him to remove the dressing. He took it off and went quiet for a moment. "I thought you'd never have a name tattooed on you?"

I glanced back over my shoulder. "It was already there and I changed my mind. Although, if we split up, I'll be wanting the money to finish the job." He gently touched the place where his name could still be read and smiled slowly.

"Time we got going," he said eventually, sticking the dressing back in place.

It was getting a little close to time when we got back to the hotel so I wasn't surprised to see people milling about. What did surprise me were the looks that were being cast our way.

"Why have neither of you been answering your phones?" Karen's voice boomed across the lobby.

"Mine was turned off," Mark replied.

"Must have forgotten to turn mine back on after I charged the battery." I reached into my pocket and switched the phone on.

"You'd better listen to your messages then, Jade." I shrugged and checked the screen. I had eight missed calls. Puzzled, I dialled my voicemail number and waited while it told me that I had a message. I listened to Peter's voice, frowning as I heard what he said.

"I've been called back to Stamford," I said to Mark. He looked mystified too.

"I think there's something you should both see," Karen said in a quieter voice, unfolding a newspaper.


	20. Chapter 20

The first thing that caught my eye on the page that Karen was holding out was a picture of Sara. Right next to it was a photo of Mark and me together. It was one that I didn't recognise. I took the paper from Karen and went over to a table, unfolding the page so that I could read it properly. Mark followed me and looked over my shoulder.

"The Enquirer," he snorted derisively, glancing at the top of the page. "Should have guessed. What does it say?"

"Look at the fucking headline for starters! 'Undertaker Taken Away - Deadman Walks,'" I read out loud. "What the fuck?" I started to skim read the article quickly. "'We were so happy until she came along. Mark never took any notice of the ring rats but she got into his head.' She claims you got me this bloody job! According to her I seduced you into an affair and then made you leave her." I looked back at Karen who was standing nearby, looking uncomfortable. "This is why I'm being called back, isn't it?" She nodded, biting her lip. "They can't believe it, surely." She just shrugged.

I turned back to the article and started reading again. It was like watching one of those horror films where you know you are going to hate what happens but you just can't tear your eyes away from the screen. I really didn't want to know what it said, but I still had to know. The piece was very cleverly written though. None of it was outright statement. It was all put as allegations and Sara's interpretations rather than as a statement of facts. I went back to reading passages out loud.

"'She followed him everywhere, never giving him a moments peace until she wore him down. I started to suspect that he was cheating on me when he began to hide his cell phone bills and was always wiping the call register and messages off his phone. It got more blatant after a while when he started coming home covered in love bites and flaunting them in my face. After that he started to change towards me and became abusive. I had to leave him before he got physical with me.'" I stopped suddenly again. "This is fucked up."

"Go on," he muttered in a low voice.

"Uh, 'I met her once and she was so smug, rubbing my face in the fact that she and Mark were public now. She's nothing but an insignificant little message girl and she was so proud of herself for having caught someone like him, having stolen him away from his wife and child. She virtually admitted to me that they had been sleeping together for some time while we were still married.' Oh, that is too far!" I turned back to Mark. "You need to promise me you'll stay calm."

He looked at me and his eyes narrowed. "What?"

"'He was so horrible to our daughter, Amber, in those last few months. He would yell at her for no reason and push her away. She got so confused and is now so scared of him that I'm trying to stop him from seeing her, from getting anywhere near her.' That fucked up, two faced, conniving lying BITCH!" I span back towards Karen. "There is only one statement in that whole thing that is true and that is the fact that I met her once."

"Jade," Karen began hesitantly. "You know how seriously the company has to take things like this. Especially when it's spread all over one of the biggest tabloids in the US."

"But according to that I was sleeping with Mark when I was still in the UK. I didn't even get to this country until a couple of months before I took this job, and they were already divorced before I emigrated over here. I want to know where the hell she got that picture too. It's not one Tara took. Look, you can see her in the background there." Closer inspection of the picture showed that it had been taken in an arena backstage area. There couldn't have been that many people who could have taken that photo. I scanned down the page further and came to another passage that caught my eye.

"What now?" Karen asked, seeing my expression darken.

"Listen to this. 'I feel sorry for Mark now. It seems that Jade may be bored with him and moving her attentions elsewhere. There are rumours that she has been spending a lot of time with Dave Batista and boasting that he is next on her list of potential conquests. It can't be a coincidence that she was heard to say that and now his marriage is breaking down.' This is all just total bullshit."

I took a look back towards Mark and almost took a couple of steps backwards. I had seen him angry before but never like this. It was like an almost palpable aura around him and his eyes looked hard and dead. I had to screw up the courage to put a hand on his arm and couldn't quite hold in the flinch when he turned that furious scowl in my direction.

"I'm coming to Stamford. I need to see Vince," he ground out before balling the paper up and turning to stalk through the lobby. I turned back to Karen.

"Guess I'd better book two seats on the next plane then. And find a bloody good disguise." She put a hand on my arm and gave me a sympathetic smile. I took a deep breath or two and trailed after Mark. I wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do but to be honest I was feeling rather lost.

What hurt me was that I saw some of the company employees as I wound my way towards Mark's room, both back stage people and wrestlers and they kind of veered away from me, not wanting to meet my eyes. These were the people I worked with on an almost daily basis and they seemed to have believed what had been written. The very worst of it was when I came face to face with Dave. Out of all the people I would have thought would be on my side, he and Tara would have been top of the list. When we came across each other though he frowned.

"Don't tell me you believe it?" I asked bitterly, shaking my head. "Come on Dave, work it out. You know me better than that. Besides, if you want to listen to that crap she came out with, you and I are already fucking each other anyway. Let me tell you something, sweetheart. If we are, you sure are a sore disappointment to me, 'cos I didn't feel a damn thing." Once again my smart mouth had taken off on me and all the rage that had built up reading those damn lies had poured itself out on the one person I had thought was really my friend. Dave sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"I didn't want to believe it, Jade. I guess I just needed to hear it from you before I was really convinced." He looked at me, a slightly more sympathetic expression on his features. "So, what happens now?"

I grimaced and braced my back against the wall to talk to him. "I've been called back to Stamford. Way I see it, best-case scenario is a big slap on the wrist and told to keep my head down. Worst-case scenario is I'm going to the unemployment office in Houston very shortly. And I sincerely doubt that I'd be very employable for a while. So I'll probably end up having to sell up and limp back to the UK with my tail between my legs." A nasty thought flashed across my mind and I looked up at him. "You don't think it'll come out in the UK, do you? I really don't want my family seeing that crap."

"The bad thing about this company is how international it is. Big star like Taker, I'd say it's a fair bet. Add my name in too…" He broke off and put a hand on my shoulder. "Not one for the easy life, are you?"

An ironic little smile twitched the corners of my mouth. "Guess not. I'd better get on and sort these flights out."

He nodded. "Call me and let me know what's happened, will you? Tell me how much Jack I need to buy?" That got a genuine smile to cross my face and I gave him a hug before carrying on to Mark's room.

Mark was gathering his stuff together and stuffing it randomly into his bags. The door was open so I stepped inside and sat on the end of the bed to call the airline for tickets. Once the tickets were booked I called Peter to let him know what time we would be arriving. He gave no indication of what he was going to say to me when I got there and didn't seem particularly surprised when I let him know that Mark would be on the same flight.

Time was fairly tight for us to get to the airport and catch this flight. My stuff was already packed and waiting in the car as I had been staying with Andy so it was just a case of gathering Mark's belongings together. It didn't take long as he had only been there one night and then we were in the car and headed for the airport. It was a trip made in total silence. For the first time since I'd got to know him Mark was the brooding dark figure I had always expected him to be. He didn't speak and barely moved for the drive, just staring rigidly out of the windshield. Once the bags were unloaded he headed off to check in and go to the business class lounge while I turned the car in and headed wearily towards coach.

It wasn't a long flight, only around three hours but it felt more like nine or ten. It didn't start well when the woman I was sat next to pulled out a copy of the Enquirer as soon as we were in the air. She flicked happily through the pages and chatted to her friend on her other side, discussing everything they were reading in loud voices. Mark being the name that he was meant that the story was near the front of the paper although I couldn't remember where exactly and just cringed slightly every time she turned the page. It wasn't long before she got to it.

"Oh, look at this," she said to her friend. "You watch wrestling, don't you?" I squinted out of the corner of my eye and saw the picture of Sara. I tried not to react and just look like I was reading my book but it got harder and harder the further they got into the article. They were really enjoying the scandal of it and clearly took Sara's part, making comments about what a little slut this Jade must be. I should have been suspicious when it suddenly fell silent, but I was indulging in a bit of feeling sorry for myself and didn't notice the woman's friend elbow her in the side and then point to me.

"Aren't you ashamed of yourself?" the friend said loudly from the other side of my neighbour. "Breaking up a happy marriage like that just so you could sleep with someone famous?"

I sighed and shut my book. "You don't want to believe a word of what's written there."

The woman next to me sniffed dismissively. "You would say that. All right then, why don't you give us your side of the story?"

"You know, I really don't think I will. I prefer my private life to be just that, private and I'm fairly sure the Undertaker would too. Now, if you don't mind, I'm trying to relax before I have to go into a meeting at the other end of this flight." I picked up my book again and spent the rest of the flight trying to ignore their increasingly barbed comments as they tried to provoke me into retaliation. I don't have a particularly long fuse and it was extremely hard not to react but I was sure that my job, if I still had one, was hanging by a thread and I was determined not to do any more to jeopardise it.

The seat belt light came on at last and I buckled up with a mixture of feelings. There was a huge amount of relief at the idea of getting away from the sanctimonious pair next to me coupled with a large dollop of trepidation at the thought of what Peter was going to say. I had just finished fastening it when a flight attendant appeared at the end of the row.

"Miss Baron, I will need you to come with me as soon as the plane has come to a halt." The two women looked at me and whispered amongst themselves. I didn't take a lot of notice of them as I descended into my usual tunnel vision as the plane came in to land. No matter how many times I did this I didn't think I would ever be able to relax as the huge machine headed towards the ground. As soon as the thing was stationary I unfastened the seat belt and stood to grab my hand luggage. The flight attendant appeared alongside the seats almost immediately and watched as I squeezed out of the row.

"This way," he said, heading off towards the divide between coach and business class.

Mark was waiting for me there. He seemed much calmer than he had when we had separated earlier although I could still see the tension running through his body. He looked at me and offered a small grim smile before reaching into his bag for something. It turned out to be a couple of caps and he plonked one on my head and pulled it down low before doing the same to himself.

"Ready for this?"

"Not really, but I guess as ready as I'm ever going to be." He took hold of my hand and tugged me towards the plane's exit. The attendant there stepped forward to say some bland comment as they usually do to departing passengers but stepped back quickly when Mark snapped at him to get out of the damn way.

I had never been through an airport that quickly. Mark kept his head down and walked quickly, forcing me to almost have to jog to keep up with him. By the time we actually got through the airport it felt like my arm was about three inches longer as he had never once let go of my hand. Of course some people recognised him. After all, it's fairly hard to hide when you are that size. I saw a few camera flashes from the corner of my eye but concentrated hard on keeping my head down and keeping up with Mark.

It turned out that the company had sent a limo for Mark to get him away from the airport as quickly as possible. He pulled me into the back with him and we were away. Now the apprehension really set in. I fidgeted a bit, until he tugged on my hand, which he still hadn't released.

"Pack it in." I rolled my eyes at him and he pushed the button to close the screen between the driver and us.

"I'm pretty sure I'm going to get fired, Mark. Talk about reflecting badly on the company!"

"It's not just you though, is it?"

I snorted. "Not quite the same thing. You're the big star, I'm just the little message girl who tried to play outside of her level. Damn sure I'm going to get fired and that would mean only one thing." He glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. "Like I told Dave, if I get fired, I'm not exactly employable over here. So it'll be back off the UK for me." His grip tightened round mine as he thought it through. He turned away slightly and stared out of the window and I almost didn't hear what he said next.

"That would tear me apart."

The rest of the journey was made in silence as we both stared out of our respective side windows. At least I had something else to think about now. That was the first time that Mark had said anything regarding how he felt about me, about us. He still refused to let go of my hand, even when the limo drew up outside the office. I scrambled out behind him and took a couple of deep shaky breaths staring up at the building where this whole story had begun a few months earlier. We stepped inside the lobby and my head dropped a little, bowed down by the anticipation of what was to come.

"Hold your head high, baby girl," Mark muttered in my ear. "We haven't done anything wrong." I nodded and managed a weak little smile as we made our way to the reception desk. The receptionist looked up quickly.

"Mr McMahon is waiting in his office for you," she said to Mark. "I'll just let his secretary know you are here and someone will be down to escort you."

"I know the way," he replied. He gave my hand a final squeeze. "I'll meet you back here." The receptionist put the phone back down from speaking to the secretary upstairs and turned to me.

"Mr Robson is also in his office. I'll just let him know you are here." I just nodded and waited. I hadn't been here often and didn't know my way round well enough to head up by myself. Shortly afterwards an elegant woman came down to collect me and escorted me to Peter's office in silence. I stood outside the door, took a few more deep breaths and knocked.

"Come in," he called. "Ah, Jade, come in and sit down."

"Peter," I replied, taking a seat opposite him. I wasn't reassured when I saw a copy of the Enquirer open on the offending page on his desk.

"I expect you know why you are here," he said, gesturing to the paper beside him. I nodded. "It's a bad situation, Jade. Really doesn't look good at all."

"But none of it is true," I burst out. "They'd been divorced for six months before I met Mark for long enough to say more than 'hi' and I wasn't even in this country at the time when she says we started seeing each other."

"We have to take it seriously though, Jade. Some people always had their doubts about letting the two of you carry on, but you promised me that it wouldn't affect your ability to do your job."

"And it hasn't. I am still perfectly capable of doing my job perfectly well," I protested.

"You have also presented the company in an extremely bad light. Scandals like this are something we try very hard to avoid. I have no choice, Jade. Until further notice you are on suspension. You will still be paid until such time as a further decision on your future in the company is made." He held up a hand as I opened my mouth to speak. "One further… suggestion is that you stay right away from Mark Calaway. Go home and keep your head down. I'll be in touch when I have anything more to tell you."

It was clear that I was dismissed. I stood up and left the office, feeling completely numb. Granted, it hadn't been as bad as it might have been. I still had my job, for the moment at least, but that seemed to be a far from definite thing.

I wondered what to do as the elevator slowly descended to the ground floor. The implication of what Peter had said was very clear. As far as the company was concerned, the further apart Mark and I were the better. Not that it was going to be a problem for long. I'd be in my tiny little apartment in Houston and he'd soon be heading towards Canada. After all we'd been through to be together the idea of staying apart because we had been told to really got my hackles up. There was little I could do about it however. Unless I was ready to make a very clear choice between Mark and my job I had to behave as if my job was more important. Things with Mark weren't clear enough or established enough to make any other decision. There was also the possibility that he had been told much the same – to stay away from me. His career had been the main driving force of his life for so many years that I avoided thinking about that at all.

The decision was taken out of my hands when I reached the lobby. As I stepped out of the elevator I saw Mark leaning against the wall, watching for me. Unsure quite what to do for a few seconds I ground to a halt, looking at him. He simply nodded his head slowly once and held out a hand. All of the rational discussion I had forced myself to go through on the ride down deserted me and I hurried over to him and took the outstretched hand.

"I'm supposed to stay away from you," I muttered.

"Vince tried to tell me the same thing. What happened?"

I sighed. "I still have a job for the moment. I'm suspended until further notice. Or as Peter put it 'until a further decision on your future with the company has been made' so make of that what you will. How about you?"

He shrugged. "Vince ran his mouth about how bad it all was, terrible for the company image and ratings and then in the next breath said he's turning me heel to capitalise. Told me to steer clear of you too, but he ain't going to fire me now, is he?"

A throat was cleared to one side of us. "Excuse me, I have both your plane tickets here." We both turned and accepted the papers from the young man.

"Ah well, Houston here I come," I said, looking at the destination printed on it. "Back to my little apartment. Guess yours is to Toronto, huh?" He just raised an eyebrow. "I guess I should be going then. I don't have an awful lot of time before my flight." I slackened my fingers from his and made to turn away, spinning back when he refused to let go, and gave my arm a gentle tug.

"Where do you think you are going, girl?" He was frowning as he spoke.

"Doing as I'm told."

"Staying away from me?" He tilted his head on one side, eyes bright. "That kind of needs us both to do as we are told, and I've never been one for that. So, we are gonna walk out of this place together." He let go of my hand and rested an arm round my shoulders, giving me a look that almost dared me to argue with him. I could hear voices muttering nearby and knew that this touching little scene was going to get reported back upstairs. Finding that I cared much less than I would have expected to, I held my head up high and allowed him to lead me back outside. The limo was still there and we climbed back inside for the return trip to the airport.

I spent the whole of the ride back cuddled up against him. I had no idea when I would get to see him next and a flash of sympathy for the wrestling wives crossed my mind. I had really had it easy up until that point as I went wherever he went as a matter of course. Suddenly that wasn't true any more. Not only that but in the last few months the WWE travelling circus had largely become my friends, a family of sorts and I was being isolated from all of them.

We said our good byes in the privacy of the limo to avoid drawing any more attention than was absolutely necessary.

"This is going to be really weird," I sighed. "I'm going to miss you."

"Hey, I'll miss you too, baby girl. Here, this might help though." He shrugged off his jacket and wrapped it around me. "There you go." I snuggled down into it and breathed in his scent on it. I was taken aback to feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes and cleared my throat roughly.

"I'd better go first. My flight leaves earlier than yours anyway." I turned back to him and bit my lip.

"I'll call you later or tomorrow." He leant forward and brushed a gentle kiss over my lips. "Now get out of this damn car before I decide I can't let you go."

If I didn't move right then, I wasn't going to so I sort of shook myself and climbed out, going to the back to get my bags. I refused to look round as I walked away, knowing that I would stop if I did. It was whether I would have been able to get going again that was doubtful.

I managed to avoid getting too much attention during waiting to board my flight by pulling the collar of Mark's jacket right up and the cap that he had given me earlier right down low and pretending to be engrossed in a magazine. The advantage of having the collar up like that was that every time I moved I got a waft of that familiar smell, cologne and leather.

The flight was passed in much the same way. I was incredibly tired and fighting getting more than a little emotional. If challenged then there would have been absolutely no way that I would have been able to cope as calmly as I had done travelling in to Connecticut.

I broke all my previous speed records for getting out of airports. As soon as the plane had stopped moving I was on my feet, hat crammed down and collar right up, hand luggage retrieved and ready to go. Instead of my usual waiting patiently to gather my bags I was in at the sharp end, elbows out to get to my stuff and get out of there. As soon as the bags were in my sticky little mitts I was away and out of the doors to find a cab.

Shortly afterwards I was lugging my bags up the stairs and dropping them down in front of the door to my apartment. Putting the key in the lock and turning it I pushed the door open and kicked my stuff inside. Shutting the door behind me I dropped the keys on the table and surveyed my little kingdom.

I hadn't been here for weeks and so had absolutely no groceries in at all. Bearing in mind that I hadn't eaten since breakfast, I checked the time and rushed a phone order in with the Chinese place that I sometimes used. Once the phone was put down, I shrugged Mark's jacket off and laid it over the end of the couch. Finding the remote control, I flicked the TV on. Bad mistake. We had made it onto the TV. On Oprah, of all things. There was Sara, looking all woebegone and hard done by, telling Oprah all about how I had manipulated her husband into an affair and ruined their happy marriage. There were more photographs that I didn't recognise, ones of me alone and with Mark.

I managed to watch for about five minutes and then turned it off quickly before I started throwing things at the screen. Deciding I had time before the takeout arrived I ran down to the liquor store on the corner. I needed a drink. Boy, did I need a drink.

The takeout was a complete waste of money. After it had been delivered I dumped the whole thing in the trash, all appetite gone. The Jack Daniels was a different matter. My old friend called to me, telling my confused brain that it could make it all better, make it all go away. I cracked the seal and released it to do its magic.

After a couple of hits from the bottle I looked around the room vacantly and my gaze fell on Mark's jacket. Leaning over I pulled it off the end of the couch and onto my lap. Bundling it up I put my face against it and breathed in deeply, surrounding myself with him in the only way I could right now.

That was when it hit me. I was all alone. My friends were currently heading into a different country, my lover with them. I sat there hugging that jacket and touching the necklace he had given me only a few days before and let the tears fall freely.


	21. Chapter 21

The sound of the phone ringing was like a blunt rusty saw being dragged through my skull. I opened my eyes and gazed blearily to the front, confused as to where I was and why the room seemed to be wobbling around me. Eventually I managed to sit up and grab the phone from the little table beside the couch.

"'Lo?" I croaked.

"Do you feel like explaining to me exactly what you are doing splashed all over the Sun newspaper?" I screwed my eyes shut as my mother's voice rose in pitch. "No wonder you didn't want to tell me about him. How could you? I thought I brought you up better than that!"

"Mum, wait," I managed to interject. "It's not how it looks."

"Not how it looks? How can it be anything else? You had an affair with a married man and split up his family! Of all the selfish, self-centred and plain evil things to do! How could you be so stupid? I knew that being with that man was a bad idea! Just tell me this, is that why you left Ben? Because you were shacking up with that Neanderthal?"

"Mum, listen to me…"

"How could you do something so ridiculous? To leave a perfectly good man to take up with someone like that, and a married man as well! I'm so ashamed of you. Everyone is talking about it in the village. I have never been so embarrassed in my life! I can barely hold my head up in the local shop!"

"Is that the reason you rang? To tell me how inconvenient my love life is making things for you? Never mind the fact that none of it is true, but of course you'll believe anything of me." I wiped a hand down over my face.

"Don't you dare talk to me like that! After all the effort we put into to making sure that you were brought up correctly you go and behave like this, like a common little whore!"

That did it. I couldn't listen to any more. Clenching my free hand into a fist I took a quick breath and launched off at her.

"Have you finished? Because if all you want to do is insult me then I have better things to do than listen to you. Just piss off and leave me alone!" I dragged the phone away from my ear and pressed the end button. As soon as I did so it rang again and I punched the button without looking at the screen.

"What?"

There was a pause at the other end. "Jade, are you all right?"

I relaxed on hearing that voice. "I'm sorry, Mark. I thought you were my mother again wanting to call me a few more names."

"Ah," he said slowly. "It's reached over there then."

"Apparently we're splashed all over the pages of her least favourite tabloid. And she believes every word. Hell, I feel rough!" I worked my neck from side to side, feeling it crackle from where I had slept strangely on the couch.

"You OK, baby girl?" He sounded concerned.

"Yeah, just drank a little too much I guess. Feeling a bit lonely and sorry for myself."

"What are you going to do with yourself today?" he asked.

"Make the most of the time I suppose. Take my bike out for a blast, go and get some groceries 'cos I don't have anything to eat here." I got off the couch at last and went in search of coffee, the one thing that I was likely to be able to find in the kitchen. "House show tonight, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I've got to go and run through it before long. I just wanted to call and make sure you were OK."

"I'll be fine. Felt very strange to wake up here though. I could go right off this apartment. Look, you go and practice. I'll be off out soon to do some shopping and blow the cobwebs out. I'll talk to you later. I love you."

"Later, baby girl." I heard the click as he broke the connection. Fresh tears threatened to spill over my lids but I cuffed them away angrily and got on with the coffee.

I had always made a conscious decision not to ride a bike when I was angry. Especially not a sports bike like the one I now owned. All that power and speed coupled with a brain that wasn't exactly at its most rational could never be considered a good idea. I got away with it that time, both in terms of not getting a speeding ticket and not wrapping both that beautiful machine and myself round a tree. I rode for some miles that day, all the way out to the end of Mark's driveway where I parked up for a while, chain-smoking half a pack of cigarettes and just thinking about everything.

I had heard the subtext in what Peter had said. Basically it was just a matter of time until I was going to be fired. They had to get rid of as much of the scandal as they could and I was the disposable one. There was no way that the company was going to do anything to one of their biggest stars. Mark had told me himself in Stamford that Vince had come up with the angle of turning him heel and using the bad publicity to the company's advantage. Shaking my head, I ground out the last cigarette under the heel of my boot and pulled my helmet back on.

On the way home I stopped off at the store to pick up some groceries. While in there a woman actually spat at me. To an extent the comments and looks I had been getting were like water off a duck's back, stick and stones as the saying goes. That was totally different and really shook me up. I couldn't have said why it did but I got out of there as quickly as I could, dropping my basket of groceries on the floor and just walking out. I found another store a few blocks away and did a lightning fast shop there, heavy on the alcohol section.

Those next few days kind of blurred together in my memory. I had two constants in my life right then, one that kept me slightly grounded and the other that was going to threaten to take over my life. Mark called me at least once every day, sometimes twice if I had sounded really off the first time. As the days went on I guessed I was sounding off more and more often. That would have been because I spent a large proportion of my time drunk. It saved me from having to think. As much as I liked to claim that I didn't bury my head in the sand there was a large childish streak in me at times that kind of said 'I don't want to deal with this, so I'm not going to!' and that was helped most ably by the bourbon.

I started to get other phone calls too. Andy called me from Chicago a couple of times. He didn't believe a word of it, and that helped me feel better for a while. After a couple of days what I considered to be the strangest calls started. They were from papers and magazines, wanting me to tell my side of the story. I spoke to Mark about it and he just told me to do whatever I felt like. Typical sort of answer from Mark that gave absolutely no indication of what he was thinking. Sara still wasn't letting up and the publicity she had got from being on Oprah had been huge. I kept on saying no to begin with but then People magazine caught me at a time when I was feeling really low.

My mother had called again and hurled a lot of verbal abuse down the phone at me. It really hurt me that she had been so willing to believe all what had been written about me. It was Andy that filled me in as to exactly why, a story of my family that I had never heard. Apparently when I had been younger my father had been caught having an affair and had very nearly left my mother and all of us to go off with his mistress. It explained why my mother was so vehement about the subject but still not why she was so ready to believe that I would do such a thing. So when the person from People magazine called me I just didn't really think about it. Just said 'fine, let's do it.'

It was at the end of that first week of my suspension when the journalist called me back as arranged. It was done as just a friendly chat, a chance to give my side of the story and she promised that there wouldn't be any difficult questions. The magazine would be out a few days afterwards and she assured me that my interview would be in it.

The day the magazine was due to come out I woke up in the early afternoon with a huge hangover. It was that bad that I snapped at Mark at first when he rang.

"Hey, baby girl. How you doing?"

"Just fine and fucking dandy!" I spat out.

"Whoa, what's your problem today?" he asked slowly.

"Not a thing, everything is AOK! Things are so good I'm going to frolic through some fields later! What do you think my problem is?"

"Don't take it out on me, darlin'." He sounded resigned more than anything else.

"Well what do you expect? I'm here on my own, I have a hangover from hell and an interview that could quite possibly get me fired is out today! I'm taking it out on the first person I speak to and unlucky for you the bunny man was late!" I knew I was being a total bitch but couldn't seem to stop.

"You did an interview?" He was slightly taken aback.

I groaned. "Yes. It comes out today, I think. I can't quite remember."

"What is it in?"

"People or some shit like that. I can't remember right now." I ran a hand through my hair, wincing at the tangles in it.

"What the hell did you say?"

"I can't remember what I had for dinner last night, or even if I had dinner last night so how the hell do you expect me to remember that?" I sighed and wiped my hand over my face.

"Baby girl, how much did you have to drink last night?" He sounded concerned now, his voice gentle.

"Er…" I peered blurrily at the bottle on the table. "'Bout a fifth of a bottle."

"And before that?"

"I can't remember. Some beer, and some vodka."

"I'm worried about you, darlin'. It's not good to drink that much at all, let alone on your own." I felt the almost ever-present threat of tears trying to overwhelm me.

"I'm OK really. I just miss you."

He sighed. "Yeah, I miss you too. It's strange being on the road on my own now. Why don't you go have a shower, a gallon of coffee and see if you can figure out where that interview is? Call me when you find it, OK?"

"Alright. I'll talk to you later." I pressed the end button quickly as the tears couldn't be held back any longer.

I took his advice and took a very long, very hot shower followed by a couple of huge mugs of strong coffee. Feeling that I couldn't put it off any longer I traipsed to the local store to attempt to find the magazine. It took a little while of flicking through the glossies on display before I found it, and a couple of smartass comments from the guy in the store about it not being a lending library. I threw the right money at him and snarled a reply before stomping back to my apartment to assess the damage. I didn't know whether it was the amount I had been drinking since but I really couldn't remember clearly what I had said. I got back in my apartment and made more coffee. Sitting down on the couch I put the coffee next to the Jack on the table, figuring I was covered for however it had gone that way. Taking a couple of deep breaths, I opened the magazine, flicked through to find the article and began to read.

Among the big news currently is the alleged love triangle involving the wrestler the Undertaker, his ex wife and a mysterious English woman said to have been the cause of their marriage break up. Sara Calaway has been putting forward her version of events both in the papers and on TV but up until now nothing has been heard of the other side of the story. People magazine recently caught up with Jade Baron, the other woman caught up in this scandal and invited her to put forward her side of the story.

Q: You're here to tell the world the truth...so what IS the truth?

_A: The truth is very simple. I didn't even meet him until after he and Sara were divorced. If they hadn't been divorced the idea of a relationship with him would never even have entered my head._

_Q: Do you have proof? Not to take sides but it's what every reader has on their mind._

_A: According to the allegations that have been made, I was sleeping with him before they were divorced. I have copies of the paperwork from immigration showing that I didn't even enter this country until two, maybe three months after the divorce was finalised._

_Q: So why do you think Sara is doing this?_

_A: I think that she has realised she made a huge mistake letting a man like Mark go. I know for a fact that she approached him with a view to attempting reconciliation. She obviously didn't like it when he told her that his life didn't include her any more._

_Q: Mark is The Undertaker's real name isn't it? She wasn't happy that Mark wasn't interested anymore and decided to make up a piece for the tabloids? Is anything she said true?_

_A: Yes, his name is Mark. As for truth, well, I did meet her once, very briefly._

_Q: Has Mark ever hit you or been physical towards you in a way he shouldn't have?_

_A: Never. It's just not something I could ever see him being capable of. I know how strange that might sound given his career but no. Definitely not._

_Q: There have been hints of child abuse. Is it likely that these are true?_

_A: I can categorically state that I would not believe him capable of abusing anyone. He adores his child._

_Q: He's a big guy who looks like he'd have a temper to match. Are you saying that even when really angry he wouldn't raise a hand to say a woman or child?_

_A: I can't deny that he does have a temper, and I sometimes seem to do my best to provoke it, but I have never once thought that he would behave physically towards me in any way. And the idea that he would do such a thing to a child, especially his own is, quite frankly, laughable._

_Q: Have you ever witnessed him interacting with either his child or another?_

_A: I haven't met his daughter, but yes, I have seen him with children._

_Q: And how did that go?_

_A: It was really funny. She was terrified of him at first, as soon as she clapped eyes on him but he was fantastic with her, found a way to make her really comfortable with him. She absolutely adores him now._

_Q: Sara mentioned keeping Mark away from his child. Would you comment on that?_

_A: I think that is the lowest form of threat to try and get what she wants. To keep a father from his child is deplorable._

_Q: All of this must be very traumatising for you. How has this affected you?_

_A: Well, I'm currently on suspension from my job. Aside from that, it's pretty horrible. People make comments and shout at me in the street. I even had one woman spit at me when I was in a grocery store. On a personal level it's hard to deal with too. I'm stuck here on my own while the people who have become my friends are away in a different country._

_Q: I can imagine. If you could talk to Sara right now what would you say to her?_

_A: Just leave us alone. We haven't done anything wrong. I don't know exactly what she hopes to achieve by these lies. Just that really. Let us get on with our lives._

_Q: She's thrown some pretty big accusations around against you both and from what I'm hearing they all seem to be false. Will you be taking legal action or just let everything blow over?_

_A: That is something I am not willing to comment on at this time._

_Q: It's been noticed that Mark has had his Sara tattoo removed. Was that his decision?_

_A: Definitely. I didn't know he was going to do it until he showed me that it had gone. I certainly never asked him to do it._

_Q: And what about the tongue piercing? He seems to have gone through a few changes since being with you._

_A: Again, that was something I didn't know about until it was done. Yes, he has made changes for me and I consider myself very lucky. He is an amazing man._

_Q: Tell us about your relationship? You seem to care a lot for him._

_A: Oh boy, our relationship. It hasn't been the easiest of roads for us but we've made it so far. Yes, I do care for him, about him a lot._

_Q: What do you mean it hasn't been the easiest of roads?_

_A: Sometimes it just has seemed that everything that could go wrong has done. That is still holding true, I guess._

_Q: What was your life like before you came to America? Tell us a bit about your past._

_A: Well, I come from a fairly small village in the south east of England and I'm from a farming background._

_Q: That's quite a bit different to the sports entertainment industry._

_A: Very different. The change took some getting used to. I mean, not so very long ago I milked cows and drove tractors for a living or sold equipment to people. Now I fly around the world looking after the needs of some incredibly famous people. Or at least did until recently._

_Q: Changing again must be very hard for you. Tell us a bit about how you are feeling._

_A: For a start I have no idea as yet how my life is going to go from here. How I feel... lost I suppose. I had roots of a sort with the people I was travelling with so much and now all that has been ripped away from me._

_Q: What are your plans when the suspension is lifted?_

_A: To do my job. I'm good at what I do and I love it._

_Q: Do you think things will change after this? The way people act towards you, the public, and your work colleagues?_

_A: I suppose they must. There will always be some people that will believe what has been said and nothing will ever change their opinion of me. With regards to my work colleagues, I would hope they know me well enough to know the truth._

_Q: Will you be hurt or take it in your stride?_

_A: If they don't believe me? Of course it will hurt. Some of the people I work with I thought counted among my friends. I suppose it is in a situation like this that you find out who your true friends are, in how they act towards you and what they believe._

_Q: How are they acting towards you at the moment?_

_A: I didn't really get to see many of them before I was called back and suspended. The vibe I got was that feelings were mixed._

_Q: What about Dave Batista? How has he reacted to all this? I believe he was mentioned in the article?_

_A: He was, yes. That was something else that I found incredibly objectionable. He's going through a tough enough time at the moment without having rubbish like that printed about him._

_Q: So none of it was true?_

_A: Definitely not. Dave is one of my closest friends out there on our travels. To be honest it would feel a bit incestuous. He has helped Mark and I through some of the trickier patches in our relationship to date and I hope with all of my heart that he can get his own problems sorted out. If I could do anything to help him I would._

_Q: How is he acting with you?_

_A: Dave? To be frank, he was a little wary at first but now we're fine._

_Q: What's it like being separated from Mark right now?_

_A: Hard. Incredibly hard. We talk every day but it's nowhere near the same._

_Q: How serious are you and Mark? Are there any wedding bells? Have you met each other's families?_

_A: Whoa, wedding bells? Jumping the gun just a tad there! I haven't met any of Mark's family but he has met all of my close family._

_Q: How did they get on? What do they say about this as it has reached newspapers over there?_

_A: They were rather surprised on the whole. A lot of them watch the shows and were very surprised when they met him. Obviously the papers in the UK have had an effect on my family over there and it's making their lives quite difficult at the moment. It's the same for my family that live here in the US._

_Q: Before we finish this up is there anything else you would like to say?_

_A: Just that we have done nothing wrong. None of these allegations are true._

I breathed a huge sigh of relief as I finished reading. I had managed not to say anything too bad and nothing about the company at all. It worried me a little that I hadn't been able to remember what I had said. All in all though I felt a little celebration was in order and took a hit from the Jack, feeling the fiery spirit slide down my throat and warm the pit of my stomach. I picked up the phone and punched in Mark's number. It was evening by then, and there was no show that night.

"You feeling better?" he asked as soon as he picked the call up.

"Hey, I'm sorry about earlier. I was kind of crabby there." I tilted the phone away from my ear and took a quick swig from the bottle.

"You drinking again?" There was a hint of something in his voice.

"Er, no?" I put the bottle down quickly as if that made what I had said true. "Well, maybe just a little.

"You makin' this a habit now, little girl?" He was definitely tense.

"Don't know what you're on about, it's just a little drink," I replied defensively.

"And it was a little drink before too." His voice was cautious. "I just don't want you gettin' yourself in trouble."

"Stop mother henning me!" I moved my head away from the phone and took a quiet sip.

"Fine. I won't say another word," he growled. "Call me when you're sober."

"I _am_ sober, and even if I wasn't what would be wrong with talking to me? You too high and mighty now? Stop acting like you've never had a drink before, Mark!" I stopped speaking before I said something I would really regret. "Look, I don't want to fight with you. I think the time away is getting to us."

Mark sighed over the phone. "You're probably right. I don't like it any more than you do, baby girl but I'm not self medicating over it."

"Just please stop getting at me. This is my way of dealing with it." I leant back in my chair. "Oh and you should probably go and pick up a copy of People magazine."

"What did you say? What did they ask?" He was quiet and thoughtful as the implications ran though his mind.

"I told the truth, nothing else I could do. They wanted to know what had really happened, they asked about Dave, my past and..."

"Dave?" He broke in quickly.

"You're not still hung up on the Dave thing are you?" I sighed.

"No, I am not 'still hung up on the Dave thing' but I want to know why you were asked about him."

"Because she implied that I was the cause for his failing marriage too!" I took another sip and coughed as it went down the wrong way

"What was that?" he asked suspiciously. "More drink? Baby girl, you have a problem."

"No I don't, its just water..." I hated lying to him but it came out unbidden.

"I don't buy it." His voice was flat.

"Well you're going to have to because you're currently thousands of miles away." I couldn't help the slight sound of bitterness in that statement.

"Not everyone is. Looks like I was right. You need some company."

I was instantly suspicious. "Mark what have you done? Are you keeping tabs on me?

"It's for your own good, darlin'." He was trying to be patient with me but the edge of tension was there to be heard.

"I'm not some little girl Mark! I don't need you parenting me!" I knew it was a stupid thing to say, but the alcohol coursing through my system made my mouth lose any semblance of control.

"You ain't some little girl, you're MY little girl." There was that possessive streak again. He was starting to sound worried and in my fragile state of mind that chafed at me a little.

"I'm not anyone's little girl, Mark. I'm not a piece of property and I don't need you checking up on me now who did you send? Damn it, Mark!" I took another drink. "I can look after myself!"

"Jade, I'm going mad up here without you. You keep doin' this and I'm gonna lose you forever." He spoke quietly, almost as if reluctant to say the words.

"And you don't think I'm going mad down here? At least you have all your friends around you but what do I have? NOTHING! I have to wait it out while I get dirty looks in the street and spat on in the shops only to come back to an empty and depressing apartment? And then I have you going on at me about drinking too much. It's not fair! Maybe if you'd talk to me a bit more about what you're going through I wouldn't take this so badly! You're like a brick wall, Mark!"

"You're not only hurting yourself there, little girl. And you know what kind of man I am. That's just not how I am, who I am. You know that."

" I need to know what you're feeling, what you're doing... For once will you just open up to me? This is who I am, yet you keep on trying to baby me."

He gave a gentle laugh. "But you are my baby."

"Don't try to sweet talk me!" I spat. Picking up the bottle I saw it was empty and went to the kitchen to look for another one, phone clamped between ear and shoulder. "Please, Mark, just this once. This is the only time I'll badger you about your feelings. I just have to know." I found a bottle but it was empty. Angrily I swung round to put it on the counter top and missed, watching it fall to the floor and smash.

"What was that?" he asked, concern lacing his voice once more.

"I dropped a jar. I'm just looking for something to eat." I found another bottle and grinned to myself, peeling the plastic from the top.

"Shit, I wish I could get down there," he muttered.

"Everything's fine, Mark, just fine. I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself so I suggest you call off whichever lapdog you've sent down." I got the top of the bottle and took a big gulp.

"I know damn well you're drinking again, Jade."

"It's water, Mark, just water."

"If you say so." He sounded tired.

There was a knock on the door, making me jump. "Damn it, who's calling at this time of night?" I stomped angrily to the door and slammed it wide open. I promptly took one step backwards and dropped the bottle on the floor.

"That's a waste of good Jack, kid," Dave said, leaning against the doorframe and grinning, pointing to the bourbon trickling merrily out of the bottle before bending down to salvage what was left.

"What are you doing here?" I put the phone back to my ear. "Mark, what's he doing here?"

"I told you someone was coming to check you were alright. Now tell him to put the cap on that bottle."

"So can I come in?" Dave was smirking now. I stepped back, clearing the way for him to step inside.

"Give Dave the phone, Jade," Mark said. I just stood there staring stupidly at Dave with my mouth hanging open, unable to believe that he was there. Dave rolled his eyes after a few seconds and wrestled the phone away from me. I could only hear his side of the conversation as I paced up and down, pulling on his arm from time to time, trying to get the phone back.

"Mark? Don't worry about her. I've got some time. I'll take care of everything." He lost patience with me. "JADE! Sit your ass down!" he barked. His eyes were as cold as I'd ever seen them. "Look at yourself! Take a breath!" He turned his attention back to the phone as I stormed into the kitchen, searching through cupboards again as he had custody of what was left of the other bottle. "Alright, sorry man. Yeah, she looks like shit. Uh...aside from the one she dropped? I see at least two." He sighed. "Fifths. If I don't get that vodka away from her soon, it'll be three." He groaned and paused to listen to what Mark had to say. "Hey, don't worry about it. You and I haven't always seen eye to eye but Jade is my friend. Hell, she's probably the best one I've got right now. I promise you she's safe with me. Try not to worry. I've got her covered. You want me to give her back the phone? Hang on." Dave said and turned back to me. "Jade, you are really pushing my buttons. Sit down and shut up. Mark? You want to go back into the lion's den?" He nodded and handed the phone back over.

"Little girl..." Mark growled as I took the phone back. I could almost hear the tension in his body. "You need to start behaving. I don't like it when I have to worry about what you're doing to yourself. This is not healthy. I don't like not bein' able to get to you when you need me."

"And I don't like you fathering me so we're even."

"I can't even talk to you like this." He was laughing and it was not the good laugh. It was the laugh of someone who'd reached the end of his rope and was looking for somewhere to jump. "Baby girl..." Mark sighed. His voice had gone to that tired browbeaten tone again. "This is just as hard for me as it is for you. Matter of fact, did you stop to think of what it's like here? I don't have the luxury of drowning in my self-pity. One of us has to keep on for the cameras. Guess which one that is?"

"I would know if you talked to me a little, Mark but no, you have to be the big tough fucking man who keeps it all in!"

"I am what I am baby doll. You knew that when you signed on for this. I can't change over night. You of all people should know there's more to me than what's on the surface. Bein' this far away from you hurts like hell. I thought you knew that. Didn't think I had to spell it out. But it don't matter now does it? I can't let it show here."

"I know that but you haven't told me how you feel about any of what's going on. All I've seen from you is anger and I know there's more than that. I just don't know what." I sighed and took a drink. "I'm fighting a losing battle here."

"Baby doll, put that fuckin' bottle down and I'll tell you anything you want." There was a hope in his voice I'd never heard before.

I took one more drink and then set the bottle down with a thud. "There, it's down."

"I'll take that." Dave chimed in, swooping down for the bottle before I could stop him. I made to protest but it was too late. It was down the sink. The Jack was there too.

"It's gone, Mark." I sighed deeply.

"I'm gonna have to take your word on that." He chuckled then took a deep breath. The seriousness of his mood was suddenly palpable even through the phone. "Jade, I..."

I leant forward and asked quietly "You what?"

"I never..." He stopped and swore to himself. "I'm dyin' here without you close. I keep lookin' for you in the arena...at the hotel... I just wanna call Vince and tell him where to stick the whole damn scandal."

I put a hand on my forehead and felt a tear slip out. "I didn't realise you felt that bad. I wish you were here."

"I wish I was too darlin." His voice was shaking. Was he crying? I knew better than to even ask but... "God you have no idea."

I felt my heart breaking at the tone of his voice. "All I want is to be in your arms right now. I would move heaven, hell and all that's in between to make it possible…" I let out a long shuddering breath. "Is there no way you can get down here?"

"If I come down there it's not just my ass on the line. Your job is hangin' over this, not mine. I won't take the chance of takin' that away from you." I dropped my head, the drink making me over emotional, and tried to hold in the sobs that wanted to come. "C'mon now baby girl. Stop that. This is gonna work out fine. We've just got to wait 'til it blows over."

"I... I need to go, Mark. I can't talk to you right now. It's too hard."

"But I need you..." I thought I heard him say but it was so quick and so quiet I didn't have a chance to respond before he spoke again. "Alright darlin'. Go apologize to Dave and get yourself to bed."

"I love you," I said quietly before handing the phone to a confused Dave who hadn't been listening, and then running into the bathroom to hide. I heard the click as he put the phone on loudspeaker.

"Mark? You ok?"

"I'm good. Is she alright? No more hidden bottles?" I sat in the bathroom, tears threatening once more as I listened through the thin wall.

"I don't know to either of those questions. I've found a few empties but there's hundreds of places she could've hidden drink and as for her, she ran into the bathroom. Mark, are you sure you're alright? You sound rough, man" Now Dave was the one sounding concerned.

"I'll be fine." He chuckled. "Playin' a devil worshipper got me into worse shit."

Dave laughed. "Look I'm gonna go and check on her, Mark. I'll call you later with an update?"

"Yeah, that'd be great. Thanks..." He paused. "For everything. I know you could've been spending this time with your family. I really owe you."

"It's no problem, Jade means a lot to me and I know she'd be doing the same for me." He chuckled slightly. "And yeah you owe me big time. I just hope she doesn't start singing again."

"I like it when she sings..." Mark mused. "Call me any time. I'll be up . Later."

Dave laughed. "Later, man." I heard the click, as the connection was broken. I sat in the bathroom torn apart at how Mark had sounded and holding my head in my hands. Dave knocked gently on the door. "Jade? You alright? You want me to make some coffee?"

"Gonna make it Irish?"

Dave's soft laughter was comforting through the door. "I don't think so. I don't think there's enough whiskey left in the house even if it was a good idea."

I swung the door open and faced Dave, having another mood swing. "Don't tell me what's a good idea! My heart is breaking, the heart of the man I love is breaking, and all I want to do right now is drink! Did you hear how he sounded? For fuck's sake, Dave, I think he was actually crying!

"Doesn't that tell you anything?" Dave blustered. "You're the one that put him there. He's that damn worried about you. So am I."

"Don't you DARE!" I cried out. "Don't you dare blame this on me! I did not tell Sara to go spreading that shit!"

"No, you didn't." he admitted, crossing his massive arms over his chest as he leaned against the doorframe. "But you're certainly not helping his peace of mind any by trying to pickle yourself before corporate decides what they're going to do."

I stormed past him, heading for the living room. "You want to know what they're going to do? They're going to fire me, Peter made that pretty clear and after the interview I'm screwed." I looked through the cupboard and grabbed the closest bottle. "I think I'm entitled to do whatever the hell I want right now so are you gonna be a stick in the mud and play daddy or are you going to join in?"

Dave rolled his eyes and snatched the bottle out of my hand. "I am here for both of you but mostly for you and I'll be god damned if I'm going to sit here and let you do this to yourself! Now, STOP feeling sorry for yourself and let's do some damage control! Talk to me!"

"What happened to drinking through our problems, Dave? I don't want to talk, I want to drink. I pretty much have the whole damn liquor store in this apartment so have fun trying to stop me!" I started to walk away

He nodded and sauntered casually over. "Thanks." He grinned snatching the bottle away and tipping it back, swallowing what looked like a quarter of it. "It would appear, my friend, that the only way to save you from alcohol poisoning is to go down with the ship."

"Dave!" I jumped forward to grab the bottle.

"I don't think so kiddo." He laughed and held the bottle high over his head. I had to jump onto the couch to grab the bottle but managed to get it away from him, stepping back to the floor with a triumphant shout. "You just don't quit, do you?" He shook his head and dove for me. He grinned and grabbed my arm.

"Never!" I laughed. "You wont take me out alive!"

"We'll see about that..." The determination in his voice gave me pause and that gleam in his eye only made it worse. Before I could come up with a snappy retort, he was on me, tickling for everything he was worth. I fell down as my legs gave out from under me and screamed at him to stop. "Give me the bottle, woman!" He growled and switched his tactics to my knees.

I held the bottle away. "No... Stop! I'm gonna …" I wriggled but it soon started to slow as the laughter gave way to the tears that had been threatening to fall since the phone call with Mark.

"Hey...hey...what's going on here?" Dave whispered pulling me tight to his chest. "Just let it out." I clung to Dave and sobbed my heart out. I tried to talk but wasn't able to get anything coherent out. "It's alright kid. It's gonna be alright," he cooed as he lifted me effortlessly into his arms and sat down on the couch.

" I just hate feeling so powerless," I let out between sobs. "I fucking hate this!" I grabbed Dave's shirt, balling my hands into fists.

"You've got every right to feel like this right now but you can't spend the whole paid vacation they're giving you wallowing in the bottom of a bottle."

"The bottom of the bottle is the only thing keeping me going. It takes my mind off it all and to top it all off he's in another country falling apart and there's not a damn thing I can do about it!" I looked up at Dave. "Tell me the truth, don't sugar-coat it. How's he really doing? How does he look?

Dave sighed heavily before he spoke. "He's stressed. He doesn't talk about it but I can see it. Jade, he's doing his level best to keep it together. It's all he can do. He's a professional but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt."

I hung my head guiltily. "And I'm not making it much better for him, am I?" I leapt up from the couch and put my hands into my hair. "If he had never met me then he wouldn't be in this right now! I've been nothing but trouble for him. Maybe I should just do what the company wants and disappear."

"Stop it," he said and stood up. "I'm derailing that train of thought right there. I haven't seen him as happy as he is with you since before his divorce. Jade, do you know what he did before you came around?" I shook my head, facing away from him with my arms wrapped round myself. "Nothing. That's what," he said, walking around to face me. "He never came out with us. He never talked to anyone but Glen. You bring out some of the life in him."

I leant forwards and rested my forehead on Dave's chest. "I just hate that I've hurt him so much. It's all because of me that he's in the state he is."

"No, it's Sara's fault. Don't you ever forget it."

"I need to call him..."

"Call him tomorrow. He's as exhausted as you are." Dave leaned back slightly and looked down into my face.

"But I need to get this out before I lose my nerve! I promise I wont go off on him. I'm hoping it will make him feel better."

Dave sighed, his hands on his hips as he shook his head. "Alright. I was supposed call him anyway."

I put my arms around Dave's neck and reached up on tiptoe to kiss him on the cheek, hugging him tightly. "Thank you, Dave. I know you're going through a lot right now and you still came through for me."

Dave shrugged and hugged me back tightly. "I don't think there's much hope for my situation, kiddo. And besides, I know you'd do it for me. Just remember, if I hear yelling I'm coming for it." He retrieved the phone from where he had hidden it in his pocket. Laughing softly, I took it and dialled Marks' number, retreating to my bedroom.

"Dave?" Mark said as soon as he picked up.

I took a deep breath and replied quietly. "No, its me."

"Hey baby girl." His voice softened immediately. "You okay?"

"No, I'm not," I sighed. "I'm so sorry, Mark. For everything. You're hurting just as much as I am and all I've done is give you shit for caring, taking my problems out on the one person I truly care about."

"That's my job little girl. I don't have these big shoulders for nothin' ya know."

"You may have big shoulders, Mark, but you've also got a big heart and I know its hurting right now. I should have been there for you instead of drinking everything away and making it worse."

"Darlin', I've done my fair share. I just don't want to see you end up where I did. Hell, I don't remember a whole lot of the Nineties." He chuckled, a little grimly.

"That was you then. How are you dealing with this now? Please...talk to me," I said, whispering the last part.

"It's just...hard baby girl." He sighed and I could almost see him in my mind's eyes, leaning his head in his free hand. "Sara never..." He whispered but seemed to think better of the thought. "Jade, I don't think you know what you've done to me. I don't think I've got the words..." I stayed silent, terrified that he was going to tell me something I really didn't want to hear. "Jade, I...need you."

I closed my eyes and whispered. "I need you too. Like you wouldn't believe. I feel like half of me has been ripped away."

"Everything's gonna be alright. We've just got to ride this out." He sighed. "Then we'll be where we're supposed to be."

"What did Sara never do, Mark?" I could never manage to contain my curiosity.

"Never mind about that, baby girl. I don't even wanna think about her. Just know that no matter how alone you feel, I'm thinkin' about you." Suddenly he laughed. "And just think, when I get my weekends off you're right down the street."

"I thought you weren't going to come and see me because of my job?" I asked, confused.

"Darlin', I'll sneak over under cover of darkness." He was laughing again but there was a definite playful air to it.

I laughed as well. "With Mission Impossible style rolls down my hallway?"

"And into your bed," he growled.

I shivered slightly at the tone of his voice. "As if I'd let you be anywhere else."

"Baby girl, just tell me when all this is said and done you'll still be here."

"What?" I asked in shock at the sudden change of mood.

"Sorry darlin..." he whispered. "I just...had to ask."

"I'll still be here, babe," I sighed and then whispered once more. "I'd wait forever for you."

I heard him chuckle again. "Then I can keep this up as long as I've got to."

"You're stuck with me now!" I laughed.

"I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Mark?" I burst out suddenly.

"Yeah baby girl?"

"No matter what we'll get through this. We're strong and it'll take more than some jealous bitch to tear us apart. I'm going to knock the drink on the head."

"Why's that?" I could almost hear him smiling.

"Because I love you."

"God darlin', you don't know what that means to me." The emotion in his voice was heart rending. "I'm all yours baby girl. I want you to know that."

"What did I do to deserve you?" I breathed lightly.

"You're just you. That's all I need. I don't even have words for what you do to me, Jade."

"You don't need them. I think I know how you feel."

A wicked laugh came out of the phone. "A lot harder when you're around." I could do nothing but laugh along with him, enjoying the fact that we were back to our easy banter.

I stretched and spoke once more with regret. "It's pretty late, big guy. Maybe we should go. Don't you have a show tomorrow?"

"Tomorrow night yeah..." He yawned. "I do need some sleep though."

"So do I. I think I'm going to cuddle up with your jacket again. It's losing its smell. You could've sent another one with Dave, you know."

"And do what? Freeze my ass off?" he laughed. "This is Canada, baby girl. I'll be around to keep you warm myself soon enough. I should have a day or two off comin' up soon."

"I hope so. I don't know how much longer I can go without you," I said hopefully.

"Don't worry darlin. It'll be soon, I promise."

"I guess for now I'll just have to make do with Dave," I giggled.

"He touches you and I'll break his damn neck," he growled once more.

I laughed outright at that. "Mark, you really can be very silly sometimes."

"Silly nothin'. You're my girl. Night baby girl. I'll call you tomorrow. You have my permission to kick my ass if I don't." He laughed. "I'll give you a free shot."

"Like you'd even feel it!" I jeered.

"But you'd still get the shot," he pointed out.

"I might just come after you with a chair again instead..."

"Hell!" He laughed. "I will definitely be calling tomorrow with that over my head."

He made me giggle once more with that line. "Night, Mark."

"Night baby girl. Sleep good." And with that, he was gone.

"Everything alright?" Dave asked poking his head into the room.

I looked up at him with a smile on my face. "About as perfect as they can be. I don't know for how long but right now things are perfect as they can be."

Dave smiled knowingly and walked over to give me a hug. "I'm glad. Now, I'm going to sleep. You are very draining."

My head dropped in embarrassment at the way I had behaved towards him. "Dave I'm sorry about all the yelling and, uh, did I bite you?"

He laughed and showed me an unmistakeable teeth mark on his arm. "Don't worry about it. I had to share a locker room with Randy Orton. You've got nothing on him." The big man shivered. "Trust me."


	22. Chapter 22

A/N – at the rating again…

I woke up with a fairly mean hangover the next morning. I'd always thought that hangovers would prevent me from developing any kind of drink problem, but that illusion had been put well and truly on its way to being shattered the night before. I staggered out of bed and pulled the oversized T-shirt I had slept in down to a decent level before wobbling out of my bedroom door. A disgustingly cheerful looking Dave was sat on the couch with a mug of coffee and the magazine, munching on some toast. I summoned a grunt, flapped a hand vaguely in his direction and headed for the shower.

I emerged a quarter of an hour later, grunted once more and headed back into my bedroom. Grabbing a pair of jeans and a shirt, I dragged them on. Towelling my hair dry, I tied it back and headed out to face the day.

"Good morning, sunshine!" Dave said loudly when I came out once more. "Here you go." He handed me a large mug of strong coffee. "How are you feeling?"

"I've been better." I flopped down on the couch.

"Bad hangover?"

I rolled my eyes. "What do you think?"

I didn't much like the grin that came over his face then. "In that case, I have a little something in the kitchen that I prepared for you." He stood up and went to the kitchen counter, returning with a glass, holding it out to me. I eyed it suspiciously and shook my head slightly when I saw the raw egg floating in it.

"There is no way on earth that I am drinking another one of those!" I stated indignantly.

"Jade, let me put it this way. Either you get that down your throat or I will get it down there for you. You know you wouldn't like that." He frowned at me, arms crossed. I looked from him to the glass and back again, swallowing slightly nervously when he raised an eyebrow at me. With many people I would have said they were bullshitting, but I had a distinct feeling that Dave meant every word. With a reluctant shrug I raised the glass and forced the horrible stuff down.

"Urgh!" I exclaimed, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. "That really is vile." I picked up my coffee and took a huge gulp, trying to get the taste out of my mouth. "Happy now?"

"Not entirely. Jade, just how do you think drinking like that is going to help anything? It doesn't help Mark and it sure as hell doesn't help you." He sat back down next to me on the couch. "Why didn't you try talking to somebody before turning to the bottle?"

"Like who, Dave? As far as I can see, there are very few people willing to talk to me right now." I put a hand over my mouth as my stomach rolled over lazily.

"What about me, kid? I'm supposed to be your friend."

"I know, you are my friend but you have your own problems, your own life to sort out. You'd probably be far better off trying to sort that out than wasting time here dragging me out of my pit." I looked at him out of the corner of my eye. "I mean, why are you here when you should be trying to keep your family together?"

He sighed and thought for a moment before speaking again. "It's just a matter of time, I think. We're just going through the motions, kid. It'll all happen, and probably soon."

"Hell, Dave. I'm sorry." I put a hand on his arm, feeling the muscles there bunch in his frustration. "What are you going to do?"

"I really don't know what there is left to do, Jade." He sighed and leaned back into the couch. I gave a sympathetic nod and clutched my head as the hangover monster roared its disapproval. Grabbing my coffee in both hands I took a large mouthful, hoping the caffeine would help to banish the god-awful feeling. "Besides, that's not why I'm here."

"No, you're here because Mark asked you to check up on me," I snapped. "God, I'm sorry. I'm being so selfish at the moment. Talk to me, Dave. Tell me what's going on with you?" I really did feel quite bad about it. He'd taken time that he could have been using in so many other ways to come and pick up the pieces of my life.

He dropped his head back and closed his eyes, trying to shut out the world. "I don't know, Jade. I really don't know. I'm kind of numb right now." I prodded his arm and he lifted it, allowing me to cuddle in against him, arm thrown across his stomach as I tried to offer some comfort.

"Jeez, Dave. Look at the pair of us. We're a total mess." I tried to stifle a small chuckle.

"What?" he asked curiously, tipping his head down to look at me.

"Just thinking about the thousands of women who would near enough kill to be where I am right now."

He smiled slowly. "Going to let me have that pity fuck then?" My head came up quickly and I stared at him until I remembered that conversation the last time we had been in Houston.

"That was for if you were divorced and you were supposed to be feeling sorry for me! Besides, I very much doubt you want to see all your hard work with Mark and me go down the drain, do you?" He laughed gently and shook his head. "Speaking of drains," I continued, "Did you chuck all the booze down there?"

"Everything I found. I think it's best if you don't have any around you for a while, don't you?" He dropped his arm down from the back of the couch to lie around my side. "You've been getting close to walking a very dangerous line, kid."

"It just meant I didn't have to think. More than that, I didn't have to feel. I haven't been so alone in months. Not since I started working for the company." I bit my lip as the self-pity tried to overtake me again. Dave noticed and poked me in the ribs with a finger.

"So the pity fuck is definitely out of the question? I read your interview, you know. Incestuous?" I laughed at the tone of his voice.

"Definitely incestuous. There is no way I could sleep with you now. It would be sick." I snuggled slightly further into his side and sighed contentedly. "You'll have to be content with being a teddy bear. Besides, threats have been issued and I don't really want to piss him off again."

"I don't think I have ever heard a woman say before that they found the idea of sleeping with me sick!" He was so indignant that, in spite of the horrible remains of the hangover, I laughed almost hard enough to fall off the couch.

"When are you going back?" I asked when the giggling had passed.

"I'll leave here Wednesday, head up for Smackdown. Hey, you going to let me have a go on your bike?" He looked wounded when I glared at him. "What?"

"Nobody, and I do mean nobody, other than me gets to throw a leg over my baby!" I poked him in the stomach with every word to emphasis my point.

"Jeez, and you call Mark territorial and possessive!"

We spent a quiet couple of days really, both to an extent hiding from the world. There were quite a few movies watched and we generally just chilled out in each other's company, away from any publicity. I did a couple of runs out for more stuff while he was there as we had realised early on that it really would not be a good idea for him to be spotted there.

All in all though I was incredibly sad when Wednesday rolled round and he got all of his stuff together to go. It felt strange to think that I would soon be there all on my own again. All alcohol except a six-pack of beer had been removed to try and keep temptation out of my way.

"Hey, kiddo," Dave smiled, looking at my long face as I watched him pick up his bag to go. "Don't take it so hard. I'll see you soon, when you come back to work."

I rolled my eyes and snorted at him. "Yeah, right. We both know that's not going to happen so don't delude yourself. In a way I just wish they'd get on with it so I can sort my life out, work out exactly what I'm going to do. I've always said I'd go back to the UK 'cos I can't stay here but…"

"But what?" he asked, stepping up beside me.

"But I don't want to. Come on, Dave. You've been here picking up the pieces. Could you imagine what I'd be like if I was on a different bloody continent? And there wouldn't be anybody there that would be able to pick me up from it." I sighed and glanced up at him. "You have to go, anyway."

"Yeah. Don't worry too much about it. It will all work out in the end."

I sighed. "I hope you're right. Go on, get out of here or you'll miss your flight and I'm not there to sort it all out this time." I gave him a hug and a reluctant little push towards the door. "You know, one day you're going to call in all the favours I owe you, and then I'll be well and truly fucked. Go on, get out of it."

"I'll see you soon, Jade. That's a promise." Then with a grin he was gone.

As strange as it sounds, the apartment seemed a lot smaller once that door was closed behind him. Everything was so quiet as I sat there on the couch, alone again. Feeling the thoughts of a bottle trying to enter my mind again, I shook myself briskly and decided to take myself off for a ride on my bike, clear some of the cobwebs from my brain again. As I reached the bottom of the stairs, helmet in hand, Mr Hall came out of his door.

"He's gone, has he?" he asked.

"What? Oh, yes." I watched him carefully, thinking that I should have realised that he would have noticed Dave being there.

"I read what you said," he commented after a few seconds. "None of that stuff was true then?"

I looked him straight in the eye. "None at all, Mr Hall."

He nodded. "I'm glad to hear it. Now you be careful on that little death trap of yours, you hear?" He turned and went back in his door.

The ride helped to clear my mind and cheered me up quite a bit. I went back to my apartment in a much better frame of mind although I found myself unable to call it home. For what was really the first time since I had been back in Houston I was neither drunk, hung over or miserable when Mark called. The same was true of when he called the following day. We just chatted normally about what had been going on up there and who was currently arguing amongst themselves. Get a big group of people together like that and some of them will never see eye to eye. I did ask him on the Thursday night after Smackdown when he thought he might get back to Houston to which he just said it would be soon.

Friday passed in much the same way as the day before. The highlight of the day was the run down to the store to pick up some cigarettes. I knew that Mark wouldn't like it if he found out but figured that I would have plenty of time to get rid of the evidence before he showed up. There were fewer comments and hateful glares to my face after my interview had come out. A lot of whispering behind hands had taken the place of those but I found I could cope with that. My steps did falter for a second as I passed the alcohol but I forced myself to walk on. I was embarrassed now at the way I had fallen apart. I had always prided myself on being strong but in those last few days I had crumpled into a heap. Bad enough for Mark to have noticed and asked Dave to fly halfway across the country to look after me. Bad enough for Dave to have come despite all of his own problems.

Compared to all of that I didn't think a few cigarettes were much of a problem. On past behaviour I knew that Mark wouldn't agree but, as he wasn't there, I did as I pleased. I really didn't feel like watching another movie that evening and dug out a book, something to really concentrate on to pass the time away. I picked up a book I hadn't read in a long time. If ever there was something to make my life look like a picnic it was Shakespeare. Especially a tragedy. I flicked it open to the beginning of Macbeth and soon lost myself in murder and intrigue, a single bottle of beer on the table beside me. I was absolutely engrossed and, when the phone rang, I picked it up and answered with a distracted air.

"Hello?"

"Hey, baby girl. You alright?" Mark sounded a little bothered by my tone of voice. I marked my place and put the book down.

"Fine. I was just reading." I stretched and snuggled down into the couch to talk to him. "You?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Just wanted to tell you that it won't be long until I have you in my arms again." My eyes closed and my head dropped back against the couch as I smiled to myself at the thought.

"However long it is will be too long for me." My eyes shot open as there was a knock at the door. "Ah shit! There's someone at the door. Maybe if I ignore them they'll go away."

"I'm not going anywhere, darlin'. Go answer the door." I sighed and pushed myself from the couch slowly.

"OK, but it had better be bloody important or asses will be kicked." I heard him chuckle as I dropped the hand with the phone down to my side and reached with the other one to open the door.

It was almost like a replay of a few nights earlier when I had opened the door to find Dave outside and had dropped a bottle of Jack. This time it was the phone I dropped when the door was open. Leaning against the wall outside my door, phone to his ear and wearing the lazy sexy smirk that suited him so well was Mark. I just stood and stared, mouth slightly open, unable to believe he was really there. He chuckled once more as he took his cell phone from his ear and ended the call.

"Surprise." He stepped inside the door and swung it shut behind him before stepping up to me and running a finger along my jaw line. It wasn't until he touched me that I could react or even acknowledge the fact he was there. And typically enough for me the response was sarcasm.

"You sneaky underhanded bastard!" There was a note of admiration in my voice though. He had well and truly tricked me. There had been no way that I would ever have guessed that he was in town.

"Now little girl, that's no way to greet me when I've come all the way down from Canada to see you." He tilted his head to the side, grinning down at me and opened his arms wide. I finally did what he wanted and almost literally threw myself at him, burying my face in his chest. He picked me up easily, bringing me up to his level. My arms twined round his neck and legs wrapped round his waist before my mouth found his quickly and hungrily.

He carried me across the room and sat me on the high counter that separated the living room from the kitchen. As soon as my hands were freed they went to work, pushing his jacket off his shoulders and then moving to undo his shirt, desperate to feel bare skin. Once the shirt was off my fingers trailed over his flesh, refreshing my memory about the contours of his body.

He leant back slightly, looking into my eyes, before he suddenly stripped my T-shirt over my head, throwing it to the side and bending to pay attention to the sensitive skin of my neck and collarbones. His beard tickled causing an involuntary shiver and my head to tilt back before he made me jump, nipping at the sweet spot halfway between my neck and shoulder. My bra followed the same way and he moved down to my breasts. My hands moved up to bury themselves in his hair before rubbing down his neck and over his shoulders, pulling him back up for another kiss. He stepped back again and undid my jeans, pulling them off along with my underwear and then stood back to look at me. I sat on the counter, comfortable with my nakedness in front of him, for as long as I could bear it before hooking a finger in his belt and tugging him back towards me. I made short work of the belt and his zipper, opening them quickly and sliding my hand inside to rub and then grip him firmly, revelling in the way his breath shortened and his head dropped forward on to my shoulder. I turned my head and nipped sharply at the skin of his neck, just below his ear, and took my hand out of his jeans, pushing them down just enough to free him completely.

His head came up and his eyes met mine. Grabbing hold of my hips suddenly he pulled me right to the very edge of the counter.

"I can't wait any longer, baby girl. I need you," he muttered. My breathing stepped up a gear as I dropped a hand to guide him and my back arched as he pushed his way in slowly. "Damn!" he hissed, resting his head against mine as he was fully sheathed. "Feels like it's been so long." I had no words to give as I hooked my legs round his, trying to get him as close as possible. As he began to move I groaned and then frowned in frustration. The counter was a great height for us but there was nothing to brace against, no way for me to push back into him as I wanted to. I felt an almost desperate need to be as close to him as it was possible to get.

"No good. Need to move," I grumbled. Mark simply picked me up and stepped to the side, pushing my back up against the wall in the large gap between the counter and the refrigerator. I had one arm hooked around his shoulders and one hand holding on to the top of the refrigerator, allowing me to push hard against the wall, giving him as much access as possible.

There were no more words, just the sounds of breathing and soft moans or hisses of pleasure. The whole world seemed to have disappeared. The worries about my job, what I would do if I lost it, the whole sordid saga in the press, all of it vanished as everything narrowed down to just the two of us, intently focussed on each other. I whimpered a little as he upped the tempo of his thrusts, and then again in response to the sounds I was making, as if they were spurring him on. I took my arm from the refrigerator and wound both hands into his hair, pulling his face to mine for a fierce, deep hungry kiss as I writhed my body between him and the wall, groaning into his mouth as the sensations began to swell, wrenching my head away as my climax crashed over me with an almost frightening intensity. I buried my face in his neck to smother the helpless noises I was making, vaguely mindful of the fact that these apartments had thin walls. Still he drove on, increasing his pace still further until, with a loud grunt, he lunged in hard one final time, body shuddering as he came. He leant his forehead on the wall next to mine as he heaved in great deep breaths. I dropped my head forwards onto his shoulder, eyes closed and waited for my own body to calm.

"I can't tell you how good that felt," he muttered eventually, lifting his head from the wall. I opened my eyes and raised my own head to meet his gaze, smiling softly and leaning forward to meet him as he moved forward to kiss me again. He then lifted me away from the wall and carried me to the couch, putting me down gently before dropping onto the seat next to me and gathering me into his lap.

"Some way to say hi," I sighed, wriggling to get comfortable in his arms. He made a contented noise in his throat and held me close against him. We made out like a couple of teenagers for a while. I started to shiver a little. It was coming in to the fall and temperatures were starting to go down although I had yet to turn any form of heating on, preferring to simply wear more clothes.

"You OK?" he asked, feeling the vague trembling running through my body.

"Just a little cold," I replied, stretching my back.

"Reckon I can think of a good way to remedy that," he grinned, pushing me up to my feet. I just shook my head at him and picked up the bottle of beer from the table, draining it. "How much of that have you had?" he asked, a slight frown line appearing between his eyes.

"Just this one." He raised his eyebrows, not looking entirely convinced. "What, you want to go check the trash?" He got up, fastening his jeans back up and did exactly that. Angrily I stalked over to where my clothes had ended up and grabbed my T-shirt, preparing to drag it back on. "Why don't you just check the whole damn place while you're at it?" He turned back towards me swiftly and the look on his face showed me that he was still angry about the whole thing.

"Don't try my patience, little girl," he rumbled.

"You know what? Fuck this!" I tried to push past him, heading in the direction of my bedroom. He put a hand on my shoulder, stopping me effortlessly and swung me back round to face him. I was so pissed off that the sound that came from my mouth was more like the hissing of a cat than anything else. It stopped suddenly when his hand wrapped around my throat. It was a bit like a set up for a choke slam, although his thumb and fingers were clamped on my jaw. With his other hand he ripped the T-shirt out of my hand and threw it back down before pushing me back towards the couch.

My leg touched the arm of the couch and I lost my balance, falling back onto it. I sat up immediately to try and get up but he growled at me and pushed me firmly back down with one hand. Kicking his boots off, he unfastened his jeans with his other hand and pushed them down. As he kicked them off his grip on my neck slackened and I ducked back and round him. Showing eerily quick reflexes his hand shot out and caught my arm. I snarled at him as he pulled me back again, twisting to get away. He took a step forward as I dragged against him and we overbalanced. I landed on the little table next to the couch, smashing it flat as his weight came down over me. He managed to catch his weight on his elbows so as not to crush me. I worked my arms up in between us and pushed hard at his chest, throwing my hips up hard in an attempt to throw him off. He gave me an angry smirk and crashed his mouth down over mine, forcing my head back onto the remains of the table. I hooked my fingers and dug what little fingernails I had deep into his shoulders, dragging them hard up towards his neck. His head lifted and he grunted, glaring down at me before leaning in to nip the side of my neck, hard. I growled at him, knowing that what he had just done was going to leave a mark.

Picking his head up once more, he stared straight at me as he slid one knee between my thighs and levered them apart. I still kind of fought against him as he moved into the gap he had made. He grabbed my arms and pinned them over my head with one hand, using the other to position himself before driving in fiercely. I groaned at the intrusion, body arching up to meet him even as I tried to resist reacting to him. He growled at me as I tried to free my hands. He pulled my leg up roughly, opening me further to him as he thrust with everything he had. He had to let go of my arms and brace himself on his hands to move as he wanted to. I lifted myself up to bite along his collarbones, dragging my nails down either side of his spine. He hissed out a breath through his teeth as I bit his shoulder once more and pushed me flat, holding my head still to attack my mouth once more.

He rolled to the side, taking me with him so I lay on top of him. I sat up, wincing slightly as he dug his fingers into my hips. His face blazed intently as he put all of his anger into what he was doing, lifting me up and then slamming me back down as hard as he could, throwing his head back and grunting with the effort. It was beyond anything I had ever felt before, his sheer size, power and strength combining to make him an overwhelming force. I couldn't fight him any longer. Hell, it was difficult enough to draw a deep breath as he repeatedly drove upwards, fingers digging into my flesh. He stopped suddenly and lifted me to the side, pushing me over the seat of the couch and entering from behind with barely a pause. I buried my face in the cushions and clenched my fists, biting my lip against the shouts that were trying to force themselves from my throat. I felt his rhythm begin to falter as his breathing increased and he cursed under his breath.

Biting my lip wasn't going to hold the noises I wanted to make in any more and I threw my head back, forgetting about anyone else as it felt like every muscle in my body went into a spasm at the same time and garbled incoherent noises issued from my mouth. I slumped forward, groaning as Mark gave one final earth shattering thrust and held it there, tremors shaking his body as he reached his climax. He leaned on the couch, hands either side of me for the space of a few heartbeats, then moved slowly back and withdrew, sitting back on the floor. I tried to push myself upright but my legs flatly refused to support me and I crumpled to the floor, twisting to lie on my back.

I closed my eyes and swallowed, feeling something click in my throat. I was still gasping for breath and could feel my heart beating furiously against the inside of my ribs, as if it was trying to batter its way through. I could hear Mark's breathing too from just to one side of me, and rolled my head in his direction, opening my eyes to look at him. I winced a little when my gaze reached his shoulder. There were clear scratch marks there, and a line of fine beads of blood marked the path of one of them. There were also a couple of angry looking bite marks at the base of his neck. Judging by the heat I could feel on the side of my neck I had at least one to match them. I glanced down at myself and stopped when I realised that the outline of his fingers could be clearly seen against my skin.

"What the fuck was that?" I muttered, propping myself up on one elbow to watch him. He raised his head and looked at me intently. I shivered slightly under that intense gaze, suddenly feeling a little uncomfortable. I gathered my legs underneath me and stood slowly, wobbling just a little as I made it to my feet. I braced my legs and waited for the swimming feeling in my head to go away, eyes closed as I tried to regain my equilibrium. I jumped and my eyes flew open once more when a hand descended gently on my shoulder. I hadn't heard him move.

"You OK?" he asked quietly before muttering to himself, smoothing a thumb over one of the marks he had left on my neck. I nodded slowly, still not convinced that I wouldn't fall over if I tried to move too quickly. His hand moved up to cup my jaw, thumb gently rubbing the side of my face.

"Think I'm going to have bruises on my bruises though," I said, rubbing a hand over the front of one hip.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked quickly, bringing his other hand up to my face as well.

I shook my head a little. "I think I may be a little sore come the morning though." I rolled my shoulders and looked up at him. "Where are we now then?"

"We're good, baby girl. At least, I think we are." He gave me a questioning look.

"Yeah, we are. I'm knackered now though."

He laughed softly. "Come on then. Get in the shower and then we can get some sleep."


	23. Chapter 23

There was one thing I was right about. I was very sore the following morning. I woke up and stretched, hissing suddenly as every bruise made its presence known at once. I didn't think that I had a muscle that did not ache as I pushed myself up to a sitting position. Moving my neck from side to side I felt the stinging from the nips he had given me there and there was a dull throbbing across the front of my hips where his fingers had dug in. I didn't look but I suspected that the outlines of his hands were visible. I had woken up pretty sore in the past from some intense sessions, but never quite like that. It had been an old-fashioned grudge fuck, taking both of our anger out on each other. I doubted he would feel quite as bad as me when he woke up but I had a feeling I might have left some impressions on him.

I dragged my complaining muscles out of the bed and dressed slowly. It was still quite early so I left Mark to sleep for a while longer. Wandering out of the bedroom door the remains of the table in the living room caught my eye and I shook my head in disbelief at what had gone on the night before. Thinking I would go and buy a replacement at some point in the next week I carried on into the kitchen and made some coffee. I was surprised when Mark came out just a few minutes later, stretching and working the kinks out of his neck.

"You're up early," I commented, pouring him some coffee and handing it over. He grunted and took a sip, groaning happily before sitting himself down on the couch. "Are you sore?"

"You know how it is darlin', I'll be fine." He shifted a little stiffly. "Hell, I could go another round from last night right now!" He shot me a grin. I laughed and shook my head slightly.

"Don't think my bruises agree right at this second." He looked concerned and I smiled over at him. "It's nothing a long hot bath wouldn't cure."

"You sure you're ok darlin'? I was a little rough last night..." I just smiled again and nodded. He looked happier and then a shadow seemed to move across his face. He opened his mouth to speak and then shut it quickly again, looking away from me.

"Something bothering you?" I asked. Mark just shrugged slightly and shook his head. "Hey," I said softly. "I want to enjoy this time we've got and I won't if I know there's something up."

He looked at me for a long time then ran a hand over his face and sighed. "I'm taking Sara to court. I'm going to get my little girl back. This shit has gone on for long enough."

I sat in slightly shocked silence for a few seconds before I found my voice. "Your daughter?"

He nodded once, swiftly. "I can't let her take Amber away from me." He glanced up at me and saw the unsure look on my face. "This is my daughter, Jade. I will have my daughter with me no matter what it takes."

"What then, though? You're on the road so much of the time. And we're just so complicated, Mark. To add a child into all of that…"

He broke in, an angry edge to his voice. "This isn't just any child, Jade. This is my child. And as for being on the road…" He looked away and then back at me. "That can be changed. I'd retire in a flash if that's what it takes." He leant back in his chair and watched for my reaction. When I didn't speak he sighed and leaned forward on the table again. "If Sara gets her way I wont see Amber again until she's past 18 and by then she will have poisoned her mind against me so she won't want a damn thing to do with me. I'm not gonna let that happen!"

I sighed and moved my eyes up to meet his. "You know I'm behind you, whatever you want to do. It's just a big thing to take in."

"Hey, we'll get through it, darlin'," he drawled, pleased with my response.

"Kids make me nervous though," I said gloomily, peering down at my mug. "Anyway, I know absolutely nothing about her."

He rocked back in his seat again, mouth set in a firm line. "You never asked me about her. If you did you'd have trouble shutting me up. Besides, baby girl, she's just like me. She'll love you." He picked my hand up off the table and pressed a kiss to my palm. "Don't worry, sweetheart. Everything will be fine." He let go of my hand and looked down into his empty mug, looking back up at me with a hopeful look.

"There's more in the machine." He eyed the distance from his chair to the machine, all of half a dozen steps and then turned back to me with a pitiful look. "Your legs are longer than mine," I stated.

"You're younger then me, now respect your elders." He crossed his arms over his chest and stared at me. I sighed and grabbed his mug.

"OK, old man." He growled and swatted me across the ass as I walked past him. I turned back to him, laughing. "Do that again and you'll be wearing the bloody coffee, not drinking it!" He just stuck his tongue out at me and watched as I poured more coffee and brought it back to him.

"You know it's going to get pretty tense round here with the custody fight. Things will have to change." I gave him a questioning look. "I imagine that we won't see a lot of each other and how we act around each other will have to change. Sara'll use all the ammo she can on this."

"So what are you thinking?" I asked warily, gripping my mug in both hands. He glanced away and shrugged, shaking his head. "Doesn't give me a lot to go on, Mark."

"What do you want me to do, Jade? Wave a magic wand and make everything perfect? If I could I would."

I sighed. "Yeah, I know."

"I don't want to be torn between you and my daughter, hell I don't want to be torn between anything." He paused for a second. "If I have to choose between some things I will." I made a small noise in my throat, although I didn't know if it was of protest or agreement. "You mean a lot to me, Jade...more than I can tell you... but this is my daughter and she means more than the world to me."

"You think I'm going to harm your chances of getting her." He just looked at me, saying nothing. "Shit sticks, I guess," I muttered.

"You don't know Sara like I do. She will use everything she has on me." He opened and shut his mouth, throwing a quick look at me before continuing. "And if they found out about your drinking it wouldn't help a damn thing," he growled.

I started angrily. "Are you trying to say I'm a drunk?"

"Are you saying you didn't act like one? It wasn't just a few drinks, Jade. It was every night and not just drunk, totally shit faced. You were even drinking when I got here last night."

"One single bottle of beer, that's all it was," I shot back defensively.

He sighed. "That's all it ever is, one single bottle of beer, one single glass, one single bottle of JD..." I hit the table with a fist, glaring at him. He glanced up at me before continuing. "I know a lot more about it then you think baby girl." There was a hint of anger in his voice. "Do you know many people I have seen destroy themselves through drink? At one time I did a lot of drinking myself. It's always just a little drink here and a little drink there when in reality it's a hell of a lot more and I won't let you go down that path."

"What else was I supposed to do?"

"Anything would have been better then drink, if you hadn't been so drunk you could have talked to me. Did the alcohol solve anything? No, the problems were still there when you woke up. And then you drank them away again. I was only on the end of the phone, or you could have gone to your brother." He looked at me with a sadness in his eyes at the fact that I hadn't turned to him instead.

"I couldn't go to Andy's. His kids are getting shit in the playground because of me." That was one of the things that had hurt me most. It wasn't just me being affected by this whole thing, it was my family as well.

He gave a little sarcastic snort. "You think it'll get better for them when it comes out that you drowned yourself in Jack? People will have seen the amount you were buying."

"Damn it!" I shouted. "I came out here to change my life for the better! Maybe I should just go home."

Mark got to his feet suddenly, eyes narrowed. "Maybe I should just remove myself from your life as it's pretty obvious what's fucked it up!" He turned away from me.

"Mark, wait!" I called suddenly. He stopped but didn't turn round and I could see the tension in his body. I shook my head. "Are we ever going to get a break?"

He looked back over his shoulder and his eyes held a strange look as they met mine. "I'm sure we will soon."

"Yeah? I hope you're right."

He started moving off towards the bathroom. "I know I'm right darlin'." I shook my head as he left. This really wasn't the way I wanted to spend what time I had with him now. I drained my mug and glanced up as he came back out.

"I'm empty," I said, holding my mug out to him. He just sat down and picked up his own, waving it me.

"Me too."

"I'm not waiting on you," I said, raising an eyebrow at him. He gave an exaggerated sigh and picked the mugs up, rising and turning towards the machine.

"Damn it, I come home after a rough week on the road and the woman makes me work!"

I laughed at the tone of his voice. "Hey, I spend enough time picking up after you and a whole bunch more on the road!"

He faced me again and held the mug up high in the air, grinning. "So what's this worth to you darlin'?"

I raised an eyebrow, a slight smile lifting the corners of my mouth. "Don't try to play with me."

He took a gulp of his own drink. "I'm real scared, baby girl."

I gave a gentle laugh. "I've known guys not that much smaller than you that have been." He held the mug a little higher and tilted it, spilling a few drops onto the floor. "You're all the same size when you're on your knees." I looked up at him with a smirk.

He righted the mug and gazed at me with narrowed eyes. "You wouldn't dare." I just cocked my head to one side and continued to smirk. That was one word always guaranteed to bring out my competitive side. I was never able to resist a dare. Mark watched my face and then answered my smirk with one of his own, holding my coffee up high. "Bring it, little girl. I'll make you famous." He took a sip of the drink and then gave me a challenging look over the top of the mug.

I grinned as I got to my feet and stretched. "Already am famous, big guy."

I started to walk towards him, watching his face as he looked down at me and mouthed 'Come get it, darlin'.' I stopped a couple of steps away and looked him up and down, trying to work out just what exactly I thought I was going to do to him.

"You want it?" he asked, pointing to the coffee. I made no reply but just looked him up and down. He flexed his muscles slightly and his grin widened. "Like what you see, baby?" Again, I made no reply and walked around him in a circle, his head following to watch me as I moved. I stopped again in front of him, a little closer than before. "Give it up, baby girl." I shook my head. "Then come get some," he growled.

I stepped up close to him, looking up at him and watched his smirk grow wider. Beginning at his wrist I very gently ran a finger up the underside of his arm. He didn't break eye contact, didn't even twitch. I reached up to his jaw line and ran my finger right round his chin from one side to the other.

"It's not going to work, sweetheart," he murmured, grin growing ever wider. I looked up into his eyes and smiled as I grabbed his crotch with the other hand and squeezed. Not enough to hurt, but definitely enough to mean business. His smirk disappeared instantly and his eyes widened.

"I told you, don't try me." I gazed up at him and tightened my grip a tiny bit more.

His eyes came even further open. "You wouldn't dare. You need 'em just as much as I do."

"That is such a dangerous word to say to me..."

The words came as a deep rumble from his chest. "Well I'm a dangerous man, darlin'."

I tipped my head back and regarded him steadily. "You're just a great big teddy bear." At the last word I added a slight twist of my arm.

He ducked slightly and growled out his reply. "More like a grizzly bear." He raised his arm still further, still staring down at me in challenge. My only response was to pull down slightly and then a little more until his knees nearly buckled. He leant forward and spoke quietly into my ear, his voice a little strained. "Go further darlin' ... I DARE you."

This was getting way beyond the coffee. For a moment I worried about the aftermath. After all, I would have to let go at some point and when I did his legs were much longer than mine, sore balls or not. However, I really had never been able to back down from the word 'dare'. I looked him directly in the eye and grinned. I saw his throat move as he gulped a little but the smirk returned toits place. I gripped a little more and could feel the grin widening across my face.

He lowered a little more and spoke again, even more strain showing in his voice. "That all you got? I thought you were better than this."

I decided that it was a case of in for a penny, in for a pound and twisted my arm slightly further. "I'm just going easy on you." I obviously had no intention of hurting him but it had to be getting mighty uncomfortable by that point.

"Don't go easy on my account," he rumbled, twisting his body with my arm and still holding the coffee up high. "You're on dangerous ground little one." I just laughed and shook my head. He chuckled at that, the strain starting to really show now. "You wouldn't do that to me. You don't have it in you." I raised a questioning eyebrow, as if surprised he didn't think so. Mark smirked and brought his face closer to mine. "Heck darlin', I _know_ you don't have it in you."

"Last chance, big guy," I replied, adjusting my grip.

He winced ever so slightly. "That's right darlin', last chance to let go and we can pretend all this never happened. Step down and let go, then if I forgive you enough I may still fuck you up against the wall."

"You don't really know me at all, do you? And if you want to be able to fuck anything at all for the next week, you'll get on your knees."

"I know you well enough to know you don't want what'll come. Let 'em go baby girl, before I decide not to forgive you."

"Not a hope in hell, deadman." I was starting to get a little uneasy about this now. There was no way in hell I was going to back down though. It just wasn't in my nature. My hand jerked slightly as he rattled his tongue bar over his teeth. He was going to start playing dirty now. A slight smile lifted the corners of his mouth and he leant forward right next to my ear, dragging the metal over the inside of his teeth again. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Not this time." He grinned and darted out his tongue, running the tip of the bar around the outside of my ear, letting it graze his teeth as it disappeared back into his mouth, before rattling loudly once more. I dropped my head and clenched my jaw tightly before lifting my head to look at him once more. "Getting desperate?"

He looked me dead in the eye and rattled, raising an eyebrow slightly. "Don't look like it's me who's getting desperate for something darlin'." He drawled the last word out, knowing how I loved his voice and accent. I shivered as he spoke but didn't move away. He grinned and began to move closer again. As he nearly reached my ear once more I gave my hand a little twist. He stopped moving and tried to twist his body with my hand to relieve the pressure. "Gettin' to the point of no return darlin'." I looked at him and followed his movements, keeping up that pressure.

"Already there. Give it up."

"Not before you do, sweetheart," he growled. "Get it over with, I _dare_ you."

"Just remember, you asked for this." I closed my eyes and applied as much pressure as I dared. He let out a grunt and dropped to his knees, the mug falling to the floor and smashing. I let go as he fell and backed up several very fast paces, until my back was rammed against the counter between the kitchen and the living room.

Mark knelt there for a time, head down and breathing hard. I watched in silence, unable to move as he lifted his head and glared at me with a murderous expression, getting to one knee and leading on it.

I opened my mouth and heard what came out of it as if I was a completely separate person. "I told you not to try me." I almost cringed as soon as the words were out. Yet again my mouth had run away from me. I had seen snippets of his temper and the bruises from the night before had still not come out fully.

"You're going to regret that," he growled in a low dangerous voice.

"More than likely," I replied, swallowing a little nervously. He got to his feet and turned to face me, working his neck from side to side, stretching out the muscles there and in his shoulders. His attention came to focus solely on me and he stalked towards me, a fierce expression on his face. I tried to back away again but simply came up against the counter again. Before I could even think to try and dodge round it, he was there right in front of me, one arm either side of me, pinning me to the counter. He leant right into my face and stared down at me. I did my very best not to look unsettled. I may have won the pissing contest but it seemed like the price I was going to have to pay was high. He glared at me for the space of a few seconds before stepping back and laughing.

"Damn! Stubborn little thing, ain't ya! You want more coffee?"

It was all I could do for a moment or two to nod. It wasn't until he had fetched another mug from the cupboard and filled it, placing it on the table in the kitchenfor me that I could move. I cleared the remains of the one that had smashed into the trash and then headed for the table, watching him all the time in case he was trying to lull me into a false sense of security. He grinned at my wariness as I settled in the chair, poised to run if necessary, before sighing and leaning his elbows on the table.

He sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. "You know, this is going to be one big ball ache." He realised what he had said and shot me a look as if warning me against saying a word. My lips twitched as I realised that I was definitely safe now he had started talking to me again.

"Legal stuff always is, isn't it?" He nodded and sighed again. "Only legal stuff I've ever been involved with before was the divorce and that was easy."

"I'm glad you're being so good with this, Jade, I was kind of worried about it."

"I can't say that I'm thrilled by it all but I'm with you. I just know it's going to be tough through the whole thing and beyond."

"There'll be no problems after, baby girl. We'll have our happily ever after." He took hold of my hands and smiled over at me. "Like I said, my little girl's just like me so she'll love you too."

"I don't have quite the same weaponry to hold over her," I said, shooting him a grin.

His answer came out in a slight growl. "Girl, that does anything but make me love you."

"Do you?" I burst out suddenly.

He gave me a questioning look. "Do I what?"

"Do you love me?"

"I...," He looked at me for a long time and then stared into my eyes. "Yes. I didn't think I had to say it. I thought it was obvious."

I glanced away for a second and then looked back at him. "Mark, you are anything but obvious. I can't read you at all."

He chuckled and took hold of my hand, looking straight at me. "Well to ease your pretty lil mind a little," his voice dropped to soft and low, "I love ya baby girl."

A slow smile spread over my face. "Good to know."

He grinned. "You're supposed to say it back you know."

"I say it to you all the time!" I replied indignantly.

"I want to hear it now," he growled.

"OK, I love you too."

He stood, leaning over the table and placed a kiss on my forehead. "I'd do anything for you, baby girl." He sighed suddenly. "I don't know when we'll be together again."

"This really sucks, you know?" I spat out.

"Y don't have to tell me that darlin'. Do you know how hard it is being in a hotel or in an arena without you? No comforts of home and my girl ain't with me. It's murder."

I glanced around the small impersonal space we were sat in. "This isn't a home either."

"It's still yours, baby girl. You know where you're going to be sleeping each night, you can plan where you're going. I don't know where I'm going to be, who I'm going be with or what I'm going to be doing day to day."

"I know, and I love that life. It's why I do what I do."

He sighed once more. "That life gets old fast, baby girl, you're still in the honey moon period. Give it a few years when you have a family back home and you'll see how much it takes out of you." I pulled a doubtful face and he looked at me speculatively. "Haven't you ever wanted a family? A husband, I mean one you really love and want to spend every day with, maybe a few kids?"

I sat back in my chair and folded my arms. "I married too young really and it kind of soured me on the whole thing. I've never even thought about kids. Ben was never the person I should have been with."

"So you're saying you'll never marry again?" he asked quietly.

"I suppose anything could happen, but I've not looked for it. As for kids, they come after getting married far as I'm concerned so again, not on the current agenda."

"So a family isn't on the cards?" He sipped his coffee and pulled a face. Touching my mug I realised it had gone cold while we'd been talking. Mark got up and began to rummage through my fridge in search of something else to drink, emerging with a bottle of soda. He obviously wanted to drop the subject and it wouldn't have been one I would have chosen to talk about either so I thought to do the same. As usual, that didn't stop my mouth from carrying right on.

"So what do you want from the future then?"

He stared at me for a while and then looked away. I heard him mutter more to himself than me, but I caught the words anyway.

"More kids would be nice though."

I squashed the small panicky feeling that threatened to overwhelm me. "I see..." I cast around for something to say that might break the tension that was beginning to grow again. "Problem is I remember what I was like as a child. I'd have killed me so many times over."

He laughed. "Yeah but you turned out alright, darlin'."

I raised an eyebrow. "Some would argue that point." He threw a glance down towards his groin and arched a brow at me. "You're not going to forget that are you?"

"Nope. Not for a while anyway."

"Just don't forget who won," I said a little smugly, raising my chin. "I still haven't forgiven you for that damned tattoo."

"And you think I forgive you for both making me look like a fool in front of hundreds and chasing me with a steel chair? You almost took my damn head off, woman."

"Yeah, my aim was a little off," I admitted, trying hard not to grin. He grumbled threateningly when he saw my face and I tried to compose myself. "At least that wasn't in front of hundreds." He made a dismissive noise and threw the soda bottle cap at me. I grinned outright and batted it away as it came towards me. "Yeah, more like that angle would have been better."

"You'll get what's coming to you girl, and when you do you're not going to know what's hit you. You already know what I'm capable of... and I was being nice then."

"Looks like you have a few battle wounds yourself there." I nodded towards a bite mark clearly showing on the side of his neck. He ignored my comment and leaned back in his chair, rattling his tongue stud as he contemplated me.

"That tattoo will be nothing compared to this payback, little girl, and the beauty of it all is you're not going to know what to expect or when to expect it."

"Is that right?" I asked sarcastically. "Maybe I should have removed your boys there permanently."

He smirked over at me. "Oh, you know you ain't getting none from me now. My boys are staying safely locked away from you. You are a hazard to their health."

"Not me going to have to deal with the blue balls." I shrugged dismissively.

"What was it you said once before? All I'd have to do is stick one of these tattooed arms out of an arena and I'd have my pick of ring rats?" He smirked again, playfully and then shook his head, laughing outright. "You know I wouldn't do that darlin'. I don't know what I might catch. Plus there is the fact that I love you like a fat kid loves cake."

I couldn't bring myself to react to his playful tone of voice. "Sometimes the Jack tried to tell me different." He frowned and gave me a questioning look. "Come on Mark. That's one thing Sara was right about. I'm just an ordinary little messenger girl who got lucky and luck never lasts."

"Hey now, what's brought this on? I ain't the cheating kind darlin'." He seemed totally puzzled by the change in mood.

"My head tells me that but..." He made a motion with his hand for me to go on. "I've seen what goes on, how some of the guys behave. I've had to clean up a share of their messes."

He snorted. "I'm not some of the guys, I'm your guy."

"Sometimes that scares me. Do you have any idea just how many women would love to take you away from me?"

"He leaned in closer to me, making me look at him. "And do you know how likely it is that it will happen? I've got eyes for you and you only, baby girl. All those girls can keep on wanting because it ain't going to happen."

I shook my head, annoyed with myself for blabbering on like that "It's just still hard to believe sometimes."

He sat back slightly and spread his arms wide. "Well start believing because I'm right here and at the moment I don't plan on being anywhere else. Me minus the boys are all yours."

I finally managed to clear my gloomy mood and smiled. "Kind of destroys the whole point," I commented with a pout. "Didn't you know I only want you for your body?"

He put on a hurt act. "So all I am to you is a glorified prostitute?"

I laughed outright. "I'm not paying you! Waste of good money!" He laughed along with me, seeming pleased that I had cheered up. My laughter died away and I grew thoughtful, although not in a bad way this time. "I was thinking the other day about the first time you and I talked."

"What were you thinking, darlin'?

"Just how much has changed since then. I was terrified when I had to come up and find you."

He chuckled slightly at something he remembered from that time. "Yeah I remember the look on your face. You had that cute deer caught in headlights look."

I smiled suddenly. "God, when you opened that door..."

"And I saw this cute little frightened thing." I made a dismissive noise and he turned to me, smiling softly. "Hell girl, I thought you were the cutest little thing the moment I set eyes on you."

I looked up at him speculatively. "That why you dragged me out of my seat on the plane?"

"Did you really think I wanted to read your book? I knew if I had that you would have to come and find me somewhen."

"I didn't know what to think," I admitted. "I didn't really know if I wanted to be there."

He looked up sharply. "You didn't want to be there with me?"

"You have a reputation for being difficult. Amanda shakes just hearing your name. I heard something about broken doors."

"Yeah well, she pisses me off." He gave a brief snort of laughter. As for the doors, no comment on that one."

I carried on almost as if he hadn't spoken. "You'd been built up in my mind as this nightmare that I had to cope with all of a sudden in an enclosed space. Add to that the fact that I'd been watching you for nearly 15 years and it makes it an awkward situation."

"Aren't you glad I called you up to me now though?"

I smiled and nodded my agreement. "It's had its advantages."

"I should bloody hope it did!" He groaned suddenly. "Aw jeez, you got me talking English now!"

"I can't help the fact I was born in the wrong country," I said indignantly.

"Hey, I like the fact that you're English, you got that sexy little accent." I frowned at him. "Oh you do darlin'." I just gave up. There was no point trying to argue with him on that point. He became serious again, and I sensed that the main beusiness behind this little chat was about to come to light. "Jade, you're going to be with me after all this has gone down so you got a big part in this... at least I hope you'll be with me, if you can stand it."

I shrugged. "I've taken all the shit thrown at me so far."

He smiled, a tinge of relief crossing his face. "And we'll both take the next load of shit."

"Good thing. It's going to be a mighty big load," I muttered to myself. Raising my voice, I spoke to him. "And at the end of it you'll have your daughter. That's a big thing to take in, Mark."

"So I'm alright for now but the moment I get baggage its too much for you?" He was trying to control his temper and let me explain myself, so I jumped right in and tried.

"No! It's not that. It just is a big thing to take in. Kids have never figured in my life plan and all of a sudden there's going to be one there. It's a difficult concept for me."

He was still somewhat annoyed. "Well I'm going to assume you had me in your little plan for the future, darlin', and if you did then you should have known I didn't come alone. It's never been a secret that I have a daughter. You're involved in my life, Jade. Heck, sometimes I even feel like you're a part of me."

"Tell me about her then," I said, trying to put the mistake of not asking about her before behind me.

"She loves wrestling, she loves watching it and rough housing with me." He smiled in a more gentle way than I had ever seen him do before. "And music. She's a real tomboy but then, with a father like me she couldn't be any other way. She does have something in common with you though."

"Like what?" I asked, puzzled as to how I and a five year old could have been similar.

"She can't stand dolls," he laughed. It stopped quickly and a wave of sadness crossed his face. "I just miss her so damn much darlin'. It tears me apart to know she's growing without me. You know I missed her first word? Her first steps? It ripped a chunk out of me to have to hear her first word over the phone, to see her first steps on a tape. Hell, I didn't even teach her how to ride a bike! That's why I need her now darlin'. I need to be there for her first dance, I need to teach her how to drive." He chuckled suddenly. "I need to scare off her first boyfriend."

"That poor little girl..." I sighed. "One sight of you and that'll be the last boyfriend she'll ever have. Being a teenage girls sucks. Especially when you bring your first boyfriend home to meet your parents."

He laughed. "Would you want bring a boyfriend home to me, darlin'?

I shot him a sarcastic smile "That would be a little weird. Just remember though, I had to introduce you to my mother. I dread to think what Dad would have thought."

He shrugged. "He would have loved me, everybody does."

I laughed at the ego trip. "Uh, I hate to burst your bubble but he would have hated you. Let's see... Long hair. Check. Tattoos. Check. Bikes. Check. Older. Check. Yeah, he wouldn't have taken to you much. He was pretty traditional, that's all."

"No need to rub it in," he grumbled. Anyway, I can be traditional." I gave him a frankly disbelieving look. He dropped me a wink. "You ain't seen me in a tux yet, baby girl. When that happens it'll blow you away."

"I'll reserve judgement on that until I see it," I commented, brow raised.

"I made you scream, remember?" he asked with a smirk.

"OK," I conceded. "I'll give you that point."

"What would you do if they made me choose?" He spoke quickly and stared at his soda bottle, avoiding my eye completely. "They wouldn't lawfully be able to but what if they implied I had to choose... between Amber and..." He stopped, glancing up at me and then back down at the bottle. "I need to know. I… I don't know...I know Sara and she'd try that shit."

I sat back and thought hard about it for the moment. I didn't like my answer but I knew that it was what I would do if the circumstances he was talking about arose.

"Mark, I love you and I would do whatever I could to be with you but this is your daughter you are talking about, your flesh and blood. I'd hate it, it would kill me but I would have to go."

He sighed deeply and looked away. "Why do you have to be so understanding, darlin'? It would have been easier on me if you had yelled at me or refused to answer the last question."

"There would be about as much point in that as buying a fifth of Jack. It won't change anything. What is it you want from me right now, Mark? Do you want to know what I really feel about all of this?" He nodded, and I took a few seconds to gather my thoughts before I told him. "I'm scared out of my mind. Nothing good ever seems to last for us. Something always goes wrong."

"But we keep on getting through it. That has to count for something."

"It just frightens me that one day we won't." He sat and watched me, saying nothing. "I've never depended on anyone but myself, and since the last few days I've found I can't even do that any more."

"You need to learn to adapt. You've got me to depend on too now."

I looked up quickly at him. "What if it all goes wrong? Say they make you choose? I'm just so tired of all this."

"We'll turn down that road when it comes. And I'm tired too." I looked at him then, really looked at him and didn't like what I saw. For the first time ever to me, he looked his age. "I hate to say it but it all comes back to Sara. When she's gone we can finally move on."

"Finally being the operative word. She isn't just going to go away."

"But she will go away. She'll find some other poor sap that has more money then I do, snag him in a marriage then take him apart. When she finds him, we'll be us again."

"Can't come soon enough for me," I said with a small smile.

"I know, baby girl but I've said this before and I'll say it again, we WILL get through this."

I nodded slowly. "Yeah." I couldn't stop the sigh that chased that word.

"You don't sound too convinced," he said doubtfully.

"I'm just feeling a bit weighed down by it all," I said, forcing a small smile.

He took hold of my hands and bent down to look in my face. "What can I do to make it all better?"

A genuine smile came on to my face then as the title of a song came from nowhere into my head. "Turn me on, Mr Deadman."


	24. Chapter 24

We didn't talk much more about serious stuff for the rest of the time that Mark was there. Everything that needed to be thought about had come out in that one conversation, and rehashing the same subject over and over again was totally pointless. Instead we just concentrated on enjoying the time that we had before he went back to the road and I was left in Houston on my own again. Despite the threats he had been grumbling at me since the little battle of wills, most of the time was spent in bed.

I hated to see him go and could even tell that he was reluctant to leave. There was obviously something on his mind though as he prepared to go and he turned to face me suddenly.

"Promise me something, baby girl?"

"What?" I asked curiously.

"Promise me you won't ever do anything like that again? Drink like that?" He looked straight into my eyes. I looked away for a moment, annoyed that he had brought it up again, especially at that moment. He put a hand under my chin and lifted it up, forcing me to look up into his face.

"Promise me, Jade. Promise me that you won't turn to drink all the time you have me to talk to. Promise me you won't drink all the time you have anyone to turn to when you're unhappy." I thought for a moment and then nodded, a small smile flashing over my face.

"I promise I won't turn to drink again. It doesn't help." He smiled then, satisfied with my answer, before wrapping his arms around me.

"I hate to do it, but I have a plane to catch." I pulled a face and snuggled into his chest, arms fastened tight around him. He pulled back and gazed down at me, eyebrow raised. "I'll be seeing you soon, darlin'. Very soon." He brushed a quick kiss over my lips and then left, leaving me in his wake, slightly confused as to his meaning.

The next couple of days passed in the same pattern as they had before his visit. I read a lot, watched TV and waited anxiously for the phone to ring. Dave called at one point to check how I was doing and Mark called every night. I tried to get out of him what that last comment before he had left had meant, but all he would say was 'You'll see.' He was right though. I began to find out on the third day after he had gone, when my phone rang in the morning. I muttered something fairly incomprehensible and searched wildly for the phone, finding it eventually hiding under the cushions of the couch. Hauling it out, I pressed the button and raised it to my ear.

"Hello?"

"Jade? It's Peter," came the voice from the other end.

"Peter?" I repeated, surprised.

"Yes. You'll be pleased to hear that the decision concerning your future with the company has been made."

"And?" I prompted nervously.

"How quickly can you get packed and get to the airport?" he asked quickly.

"Er, excuse me?" I asked, puzzled.

"We have a... situation here that needs your touch."

I frowned. "What kind of situation?"

He gave an exasperated sigh. "Look Jade, I need you to get over here as soon as you can. You'll be filled in when you get here."

"OK, I'll be packed and at the airport in about an hour," I said, glancing quickly at my watch.

"I'll have your ticket waiting for you at check in."

"OK, and Peter?"

"Yes?" he asked suspiciously.

"Does this mean I have my job back?"

He sighed again. "Oh yes. Most definitely."

I was a little concerned at the tone of his voice but quickly brushed it aside at the excitement of having my job back. "Thank you, I'll be there as soon as I can."

"I'll see you here," he said, and then hung up.

I packed in record time and got myself to the airport as quickly as I could. All through the flight I pondered just what this situation could be but was no closer to solving the mystery when I landed at the other end and came out into the airport buildings.

"Jade, over here!" I turned at the sound of my name, scanning the crowd for someone I recognised.

"Amanda! What's going on?"

She gave a little grimace. "Am I glad to see you! Come on, the car's just outside."

I followed along behind her. "What's going on? Peter sounded off on the phone and my mind's been going crazy trying to figure it out."

She looked uncomfortable. "I'll tell you once we're in the car." I sighed and continued to follow her, waiting until we were in the car and under way before speaking again.

"Tell me," I demanded as soon as we had turned out of the airport.

She took a deep breath. "Well, they're on strike."

"Who is?" I asked, frowning.

"Half the backstage crew and the best part of thirty talents." I winced. No wonder Peter had sounded off on the phone. That was a major situation. I just didn't quite understand what it had to do with me.

"What? Why?"

Amanda glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. "I think it'd be easier to let them tell you themselves. You get on better with some of them than Karen or I."

"Amanda..."

"It's rather unusual..." She stopped suddenly. "Look, we'll be there in ten minutes.

"Well then, " I growled. "You've got ten minutes to tell me."

She sighed deeply again. "Because of you."

I mouthed impotently for a few seconds and then finally managed to get an understandable word out. "What?"

"The arena isn't sorted yet and the talents are refusing to even look at the scripts until you come back."

"Why? How?" I was in a state of shock.

"You have influential friends." As distracted as I was, I still caught the slight jealousy that tinged her words. It wasn't only Mark that she struggled to get along with at times. "Especially among the main eventers."

I put my elbows on the dash of the car and rested my head in my hands. "I can guess at least one of them behind this, but who are the others?"

"Where do I start? Taker, obviously, Batista, Kane, Big Show, Edge, John Cena... It's quite a list."

I gave a groan. "Stupid gits."

"They certainly seem to feel quite strongly about it. The whole place has been in uproar." Her tone of voice had returned to normal but she gripped the wheel tightly and stared through the windshield. Oh yes, definitely jealous.

I shook my head. "They could lose their jobs!"

Amanda made a dismissive noise in her throat. "There are enough of them in it that there's little danger of that. Besides, there wouldn't be much of a show without that lot."

"Then I'm going to lose my job when I've only just got it back," I groaned. "Stupid, STUPID gits!"

Amanda brought the car to a halt. "Well, we're here now so you can take it up with them yourself." I got out of the car as soon as it stopped, heading towards the arena door at high speed, shouting back over my shoulder to Amanda that I would fetch my stuff later.

Grumbling and muttering about the stupidity of the situation, I swung the door open and stalked into the arena. It seemed to be deserted. Usually there were at least some people wandering around the corridors, but right at that point I couldn't see anybody. I turned a corner though and saw a very familiar broad back in front of me.

"There you are!" I called. Mark turned and a grin spread across his face.

"They folded then."

I refused to answer his smile as I strode up to him. "What the fuck did you think you were doing?"

"Hey darlin', it's not just me. Come on." He took my arm gently and started leading me through the hallways. I allowed myself to be steered, still grumbling. He led me to the door of catering and pushed me inside. I stumbled slightly and looked around at the group of people gathered there.

"Jade!" Dave called, getting to his feet and making his way over to me. I glared at him before scanning the rest of the crowd.

"How many of you were in on it?" Everyone in that room raised a hand. "You bunch of fuckwits," I mused, shaking my head with an expression of amazement. Dave laughed and stepped forward to give me a huge hug.

"Does this mean we actually have to work now?" Adam asked from his seat next to Amy.

I smiled. "Yeah, no slacking now the bitch is back."

John Cena groaned as he hauled himself to his feet. "I KNEW this was a bad idea man."

I laughed along with everyone else. "Well it's done now, you bunch of idiots." I shook my head again. "Why the hell would you do that?"

Mark came up behind me and stopped. "Cos we missed you, darlin'."

I turned to face him. "You're all mad."

"Yeah," he grinned. "Mad about you."

"You know, flattery will get you... just about anything you want." I smiled up at him.

"Sounds good to me, baby girl." He looked up at the people still gathered in the room. "Right guys, we've got a lot to catch up on so move your asses!"

"I guess I'd better get to the office and help out then," I sighed, stepping back towards the door.

"Wait just a minute. Not until I'm done getting my hugs, darlin'."

"Oh, so everyone has to move their asses except you, huh?" I grinned.

He stepped forward and pulled me into his arms. "Damn straight."

It felt great to be back on the road doing my job again. Although I hadn't been away that long it had felt like forever, and I soon settled back into the rhythm of my life. There were distractions along the way. Mark made it clear that he wanted to start the fight for custody of Amber, his daughter, as soon as possible. I made sure that I gave him any help I could, including all the evidence I could find that what Sara had said to the media was untrue. There was an air of constant tension about him that cycled up as time went on. Strangely, it didn't lead to problems between us to begin with. I had been expecting it and made as many allowances as I could for it.

It all had to come to a head at some point, and sure enough it finally did. I had been in the office gathering some papers to go through for the next move, and took them along to catering to check through, waiting for Mark to come back from the appearance he had been making that day. I could tell when he came back. It was the door crashing back and almost going through the wall that got my attention. I looked up and saw him striding towards me, eyes blazing.

"Something gone wrong?" I asked as he threw himself into the chair opposite me.

"It's starting," he growled. "The shit with Sara." I just looked at him, trying to take in the fact that what we had talked about so much was finally here and happening. He looked up and met my eyes, the anger dissipating. "You know what that means, baby girl." I heaved a deep sigh and nodded. "Look, I'll see you later," he said, getting up quickly from his seat again. I nodded once more and stared blankly at the paperwork in front of me. There was only one way to interpret what he had just said. I was a potential risk to him getting custody of Amber.

There was no show that night but I caught up with him as he did a rough run through of what was to come the following night. Afterwards we went back to his locker room. He was really tense, and kept throwing glances my way, making me a little uneasy. I sat in a chair once we reached the locker room and yawned widely.

"God I'm tired," I said as I finished the yawn.

"You're not the only one," he snapped.

"Never said I was," I replied, taken aback.

He stood up straight from where he had been rummaging in his bag, holding a towel, and shot a glare in my direction. "I think I'm going to go work out. I need to do something."

"Something other than bitch at me?" I shot back.

"Fuck off with your shit, Jade. I don't need it."

"You sure need something, Mark."

He muttered very quietly to himself, although I could still make out the words "Yeah and it ain't you right now."

"Maybe it's your head out of your ass," I ground out angrily.

"My head wouldn't be up my ass if you didn't put it there! All you do is whine and complain! I'm fuckin' sick of it Jade."

"Fucking hell! So this is all my fault now?"

He headed for the door. "Just shut the fuck up, Jade. I don't want to talk about it."

"Wait just a damn minute!"

He span round and roared. "What?"

I began to pace the room as my temper fired off. "Why the hell is this all about you? What you want, what you don't want?"

"Because just lately it's been about you and how you fucking feel and right now I don't want to fucking hear it. I'm going through the biggest thing of my life and I don't need some woman nattering in my ear the whole damn time."

"You know, you slay me sometimes. Who the fuck has to listen to you going on about how hard this all is, how much you wish the bitch would just fuck off?" I stopped pacing and stood in front of him, a few steps away.

"And who has to listen to YOU going on about how fucking tired of all this you are, about how much you wish this would go away and how much you fucking hate it all? Don't you think that if I could fucking stop it I would? I am not in the fucking mood for this so if you don't mind I'm going to get something to eat and then work out." He slammed the door open, nearly ripping it off its hinges and stormed out, almost running over a passing stagehand.

I followed him out quickly. "This ain't over yet."

He kept on walking, forcing me to almost jog to try and keep up with him. "Don't fucking push me, Jade!"

"I don't need to push you. You're fucking jumping all by yourself."

"Then why don't you follow suit and jump the fuck away from me... MOVE!" he roared at Dave who had the misfortune to be standing in the hallway. "Why the fuck are you still following me?"

"Because I'm going to the same damn place. Don't flatter yourself so much," I shouted.

"Jade, what's…" Dave stepped forwards towards me slightly.

"Just leave it, Dave," I threw back over my shoulder. As I turned back to face the front I saw him start to follow us towards catering, trying to find out what was going on.

"You were quite fucking happy to stay in the locker room until I said I was going to catering. Can't fucking survive without me around can you? You're like a fucking leech." He straight-armed the door open and we burst into catering, an unnatural silence around the room due to the fact that our approach had been heard by everyone.

"Ah, fuck you!" I burst out.

Mark grabbed a plate and started piling food on it, sneering at me. "You wish, sweetheart."

"Right now I think I'd vomit if you so much as laid a finger on me." He turned his back on me and walked to a table. "You want me gone? Fine. You've made your choice."

He slammed his plate down. "Yeah I've made my choice. We're over, Jade, nothing but a piece of forgotten and NOT missed history. Now get the fuck out of my face!"

I unfastened the necklace from round my neck and tossed it to him. "Then I guess you'll want this back." He simply threw it back at me.

"Keep this dollar store trash! It's worth as much as you are." I let it fall to the floor and stared at it for a few seconds before turning and stalking out of the room. I heard a crash before I reached the doors.

"What the fuck are you all looking at? Show's over!" he shouted and I heard his heavy footsteps going in the other direction. More footsteps approached me from behind and a hand dropped on my shoulder.

"Jade…"

"I'm not exactly safe right now, Dave." I dropped my shoulder and stepped away from him.

Dave ignored my words completely "What was that all about? Are you OK?"

"Do I bloody sound OK?" I shot back.

He grabbed hold of my arms and stood in front of me so I couldn't move. "No, now what was that?"

"Looked and sounded like a break up to me." He looked at me with a raised eyebrow. "Yeah, you heard me."

"Come on, we're getting out of here," he said, tugging gently on my arm. He was probably the only person that could have got away with it at that point and I allowed him to guide me away from the arena, putting me in his car and taking me back to the hotel. Once we were in his room the reaction started to set in and I began shaking.

"C'mere," he said, opening his arms. I walked into them and felt him close them around me, holding me close, and the tears started to fall. "Shhh babe, it's going to be OK," he said quietly after letting me get it out of my system for a while.

"I don't know Dave. Doesn't feel much like it." I pushed myself away, wiping the tears from my face. "Some of the stuff he said…"

"He didn't mean it. You know he doesn't think that stuff's true. He was just angry, honey. He's under a lot of pressure right now. Don't give up on you two, sweetheart. Besides, you said things just as hurtful to him that you didn't mean."

"I just told him he had his head up his ass and that's perfectly true." I could see Dave trying hard not to laugh and could, to my surprise, feel a reluctant grin attempting to force itself onto my face. It faded again for a moment. "I suppose I might have said that I'd throw up if he laid a finger on me..."

"And is that true?" I shook my head violently. "You see? Everything's going to be just fine. You two just need to calm down a bit. You two never stay away from each other for long. So, stop being such a worrywart." He grinned down at me knowing that he would get a reaction out of me with that.

I shoved at him lightly. "Watch your mouth, Batista!"

He made a dramatic fall to the bed. "Ohhh! Man down!" I couldn't help smiling a little. No matter how bad things seemed, Dave could always cheer me up. We had fallen into an easy but close friendship where we could each tell the other pretty much anything that was bothering us. Between the ups and downs of my relationship with Mark and the stresses of Dave's divorce going through, we had spent quite a bit of time together. I gave another giggle and shook my head at him. Sighing, he moved up and over the bed, resting his head against the headboard and watching me as I sat on the edge.

"Guess I have some stuff to work out," I sighed.

He shot me a wide grin. "Well until you do how about a rebound fuck?"

I smiled properly this time. "You are impossible!"

He smiled and closed his eyes. "Can't blame a handsome single guy trying it on with a gorgeous single girl. And you ARE in my room and on my bed."

I looked at him for a second. "I keep forgetting your papers came through."

"Uh huh, the Animal is back on the market."

"Single women everywhere run and hide," I cracked, poking him in the side.

He opened one eye and glared up at me. "Hey! That's not fair. Besides, six months without, can't blame me for wanting to screw everything that moves now that I can." He caught my surprised expression and shrugged, a grim line to his mouth. "Wife didn't want to know and I refused to cheat."

"Who would have thought it? The Animal is one of the good guys," I said with a soft smile.

"Don't go spreading it around!" He grinned over at me.

I heaved a sigh. "I need to get my stuff and find somewhere to sleep tonight."

"I'll take care of it," he said. "I'll get your stuff and you can sleep right there." He tapped the pillow I was leaning on.

I looked up at him. "Thanks."

"Besides, at least I can genuinely say I had a gorgeous woman in my bed."

I shook my head and looked up at him, smiling widely. "Hasn't anyone ever told you three's a crowd? You, me and your ego?" He gave me the wide-eyed innocent look I had long before learned meant trouble and gave a slight rattle of his tongue bar.

I dropped my head slightly. "Pack it in. You know that's not fair!"

He grinned and did it again, accompanied by a poke in the side. "Never claimed to be fair." Hey," he said, sitting up. "Let's go out!"

"What? I don't think that's normally on the schedule the day you break up with someone."

He gave me the puppy dog eyes. "Aw, come on babe! I need to pull and you need to chill out and relax."

"You want me to come out with you while you pull? Where's the fun for me?"

"Who says I won't be trying to pull you!" he laughed. This joking was where most of our conversations ended up if one of us was down for some reason. A little flattery and ego boosting to get the other back on track. It always seemed to work too.

"And just where do I sleep if you do pull?"

"Next to me?" He elbowed me gently in the side, trying to get me to break and smile.

"And the poor girl you pick on? I mean, the lucky young woman…"

"I think you'll be too tired to care."

I gave in and smiled, shaking my head. "Anything to shut you up."

"You know what'll shut me up," he said, dropping me a wink.

"Yeah, getting out of here and picking up my stuff for me!" I said, turning my back to him.

"You really know how to get a guys confidence up!" He got up off the bed and stretched. "Alright, I'll be about 10 minutes." He left to go and get my stuff from Mark.

I stared at the door for a number of seconds after he had gone. Then I made one of my impulsive snap decisions and picked up my phone. Scrolling through it quickly to find the number I was after, I dialled it and held the phone to my ear. The phone rang at the other end and was quickly answered.

"Hello?"

"Hey Tony, it's Jade."

"Jade? What are you doing calling me? Is everything ok, sweetness?"

I sighed. "I've been better. I need to get hold of someone."

"We'll talk about why you've been better later? Who do you need?" He sounded puzzled as to why I would need anyone that he could get hold of for me and I knew it wasn't going to get any better when I told him who it was.

"I need to speak to Damian."

Tony paused and I could almost sense him frowning down the line. "Damian? Are you sure that's a good idea? If you've been better he probably wouldn't be the best person to talk to."

"It's the best idea I've had for a while," I replied.

He sighed. "Hold on, he's just here." I heard him call as he held the phone away from his ear. "Damian! Phone call for you!" He brought the phone back to his ear. "Just be careful, sweetness. You don't sound right. You come and see me soon, yeah?"

"I will, Tony. And I'll be fine. Don't worry about me."

"OK, sweetness, here he is." I heard muffled sounds as he handed the phone over and then Damian spoke.

"Sweetness? That you, Jade?"

"Yeah, it's me. Hi, Damian."

"What the hell are you calling me for?"

"I, er, need a favour."

"From me?" He sounded surprised.

"You're the only person that can help me right now. I need you to send me some things..."

Dave came back pretty much right on the button of the ten minutes he had reckoned. I dropped the phone on the bed as he came in, having just finished my conversation with Damian.

"Hey, that was quick." I tried to smile, but it didn't quite reach my eyes. He looked at me sharply and picked it up straight away, switching into piss taking mode to make me laugh again.

"Only thing I am quick on! You got men after you already?" he asked, nodding towards the phone.

I shook my head. "Just catching up with an old friend. Believe me, there is no way I would think of him in that way."

"Oh yeah?" he smiled, raising an eyebrow. "Not as good as me then, eh?"

My spirits started to lift again, and I looked him up and down thoughtfully. "Well, I don't know…"

"Oh come on, look at me," he burst out, spinning slowly on the spot. "Absolute perfection!"

I dropped my head back and laughed. "Of course you are, Dave."

He put his hands on his hips and glared at me. "I will ignore the laugh and take it that you were being sincere."

I shrugged and bit the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing out loud at the expression on his face. "If that works for you."

He dropped his hands back down and grumbled at me. "Go get your shower and don't use all the hot water."

"Watch me!" I grinned back at him.

"Hey, if you're going to be like that I'll just jump in with you." He raised both eyebrows at me in mock challenge.

"Nu uh, no you're not," I said, waving a finger at him.

"Then get to it and save some water for me or you'll have no choice."

"OK, OK, I'm going." I had a fairly quick shower and emerged wrapped in an enormous towel. "All yours." I gestured towards the bathroom.

"There had better be some hot water left or you'll be sleeping out in the hall tonight!" he threatened, sticking his tongue out at me before walking in to the bathroom.

I dug around in my stuff and found some clothes that I wouldn't be embarrassed to be seen out with Dave Batista in. He emerged about five minutes later, towel slung low around his waist and dripping water everywhere.

"Hasn't anyone ever told you what those things are actually for?" I asked, looking over at him.

"What things?" he asked, puzzled.

"Towels." I pointed to the one currently residing around the area of his hips.

He shook his head, a slight mocking grin on his face. "Nope, I was off sick from school that day."

"You are supposed to use them to get the water off, not walk round dripping everywhere." I rolled my eyes at him. He chuckled and crouched down by his bag, searching through it. The towel slipped a little, showing the muscles in his thigh. I looked, I'll admit that. The bloke was my friend, but that didn't make me blind to how he looked. I dragged my eyes away after a few seconds though, a little annoyed at myself for having looked in the first place.

"Thought you wanted to get a move on?"

"I do," he replied. "I've just got to find the perfect outfit to make the girls fall at my feet, babe."

"Jeez," I groaned. "Should I sit down? I thought it was women who were supposed to take forever getting ready, but I'm done." I zipped my boots up and stood upright again. He also stood, holding the clothes he had picked out.

"I'll be right out, your highness."

"I should think so too," I laughed. He gave me a sarcastic smile and walked into the bathroom to get dressed. He emerged a few minutes later, looking like he always did when he was going out, absolutely gorgeous, and smelling even better. He rubbed a hand over his chin.

"Did you see my razor in there?"

"Er, no, I don't think so."

"Damn it." He looked around the room and turned back to me. "Come here and have a feel, see if I'll be OK without shaving."

I walked over and ran a hand down either side of his face. "Nah, you'll be fine. There's nothing wrong with a bit of stubble anyway.

He grinned down at me. "Good. I don't want to rip some poor girls face off with it."

I snorted. "Not just her face she needs to worry about, the way you're talking."

He gave me a wink and grabbed his wallet off of the side table. "You ready to go?"

I sighed slightly and got to my feet. "Yeah, let's do this."


	25. Chapter 25

Going on an evening out with Dave was guaranteed to make anyone feel better about anything. He had this unique ability to make me laugh in almost any situation and could be a total charmer when he wanted to be, making whoever was with him feel like the centre of his attention. We got to the club and he looked around.

"Pretty busy tonight. Hey, there are the guys. Want to join them and I'll get the drinks? I suppose I can get you a single Jack and coke." He grinned and headed for the bar. I couldn't help sending a small frown in his direction after that comment, but sighed and headed for the table where the others were sitting. I was slightly puzzled to see some of them throwing anxious glances my way but put it down to the argument having been so incredibly public. The main reason for it however came out of the bathroom and came over to take a seat next to Glen. We caught each others eye and stopped for a few seconds, staring at each other before he resumed his seat and I wrenched my attention to Dave, returning with the drinks.

"Thanks," I said, distracted, as he put my drink in front of me. He glanced at me, worried by the tone of my voice and followed my gaze to the other end of the table.

"Ah, I see. Is that going to be a problem?" he asked out of the corner of his mouth. I just shrugged. He downed his drink and put the empty glass on the table. "I know just what'll cheer it up!" He dragged me to my feet. "Dancing!"

I caught Mark's glare directed towards us as Dave spun me around to head off and dance. I shook my head, deciding that as I was there I might as well do my best to enjoy myself.

"Ready to make that big ole dumb Texan jealous? We'll have him wishing he never threw you away! And we can check out the talent from here as well." He looked over my head, pointing out girls occasionally for my opinion. His attention finally settled on a tallish blonde on the other side of the club. He rattled his tongue bar absently. "So she's the mission tonight then?"

I swallowed slightly. "I guess so. You'd better go if you're going."

He looked down, concerned at my tone of voice. "You OK?" I just nodded quickly and pushed him away reluctantly. "See you in a bit." He dropped a kiss on my cheek and weaved his way through the people towards the woman in question, leaving me to make my way back to the table. My original seat had been taken and I was forced to move down closer to where Mark and Glen were sitting. I was close enough to overhear their conversation without trying to.

"It's not even been a day and she's already throwing herself at the next sucker," Mark growled.

"That's a bit harsh. Everyone knows how she and Batista are," Glen replied. "Besides, all she did was dance with him. And he's now with that blonde over there."

"Did you see how hard it was for her to make him go? I saw the look on her face. I've seen that look plenty of times, directed at me. I should just play her at her own game. You know how easy it would be for me to pick up one of these girls."

"Yeah, and I know you're not going to," Glen observed. I couldn't help cutting my eyes in their direction for an instant but wrenched them away quickly when I saw Mark's gaze move towards me. "Come on Mark. I've seen you two together since the start."

"And?" Mark demanded.

"She adores you, plain and simple." Mark didn't reply, just got up and stalked to the bar. Glen caught my eye and gave me an apologetic little shake of his head. I sighed and regarded the remains of my drink. As Mark came back, he knocked into me from behind, pushing me forwards. I was tired, upset and pissed off. I felt as if Dave had abandoned me, and feeling like that only annoyed me even more. The bloke had a life of his own to lead, more so now than at any other time that I had known him. All the negative thoughts rose up and came out of my mouth.

"Fuck off! Asshole." I drained my drink and looked gloomily at the empty glass. "Fuckwit!" came out in a loud mutter. Mark simply gave a nasty laugh and returned to his seat. "Why don't you do the world a favour and drop dead? Parts of you already are though, I guess."

He leant forward on the table. "To you they are. You couldn't wake a mans dick up if your life depended on it."

"Maybe I could if it was worth waking," I spat back, trying to keep the hurt out of my voice.

"You tried with Dave and even he doesn't want you now." He gestured across to where Dave and the blonde were starting to get up close and personal.

"That's all you know," I muttered.

He spoke in a low growl. "Yeah, I bet you fucked him the moment you got back to the hotel. He looked a little out of breath when he came up to get your stuff."

"You fucking bastard, you know that's not true."

He took a pull from his drink and raised an eyebrow at me. "Do I? After all, you admitted to me yourself that you'd screw him." Several sets of eyebrows raised amongst the people surrounding us.

"That was a long time ago. Things change."

"Things don't change that much. I can see it in your eyes, darlin'. Maybe it's time you stopped being such a slut."

"You think I'm a slut?" I asked, outraged.

"Call 'em as I see 'em, baby girl. You went from one bloke to another before. What's any different this time? If I remember rightly the man you left was kind of like me." A nasty smirk crossed his features.

"That was different and you damn well know it." I couldn't believe he was dragging my past up like that. I had explained to him exactly what had gone through my mind at that time and he knew perfectly well how I had felt about Ben.

"What? You weren't a raging alcoholic back then so it makes it all different? Enjoying your Jack?"

That really stung. I was speechless for a second before I could begin to form words. "I am not a fucking alcoholic! I've had one drink, count them, one. I make one fuck up and that's it, huh?"

"One fuck up? You want me to list 'em all?" he shot back.

"Mark, that's enough, man." Glen was shifting uneasily in his seat. I shook my head at him with a grim little smile.

"Let him talk, Glen. I want to hear what he's got to say."

Mark rubbed a hand over his face and leant over as close as he could, right in my face. "You want to know what a fuck up you are? You couldn't even make a man in pieces fall in love with you. You couldn't see through the act." He sneered as he finished speaking. I got halfway to my feet and slapped him round the face as hard as I could. The whole table turned at the sound and watched us in silent shock. Mark's head turned with the force of the blow but otherwise he remained motionless. I sat again, breathing heavily and hardly able to believe what I had just done. He lifted a hand and touched it to where the red mark was blooming on the side of his face. "Truth hurt or something, baby girl? You want to try that again but with a little more feeling?"

"That's the last scrap of feeling I'm ever going to waste on you."

"You wouldn't know feelings if they jumped up and bit you in the ass you frigid ice queen! Then, maybe it was the company you were keeping. Too tired fucking all the boys in the back to give me a look in huh?"

I was running on pure anger now. I looked him in the eye and gave an ironic snort of laughter. "You are a sad pathetic old man."

He laughed in return. "Is that so? Who's gonna be the one going home alone tonight darlin'?"

"It's not you they're interested in fucking, Mark. They don't give a damn about you, only the Undertaker."

He got up and stood over me, towering above me. "They may not want me for me but I will always have a warm body next to me. Now you... you're going to lead a cold lonely life, Jade, all alone with no one but Jack to console you."

"You don't know anywhere near as much as you think you do. You don't know me at all, that much is clear now."

"Oh, I know you. I know you're good for a half decent roll in the hay and someone to gopher for me."

I put on a tone of mock amazement. "Oh, I've progressed to half decent from not being able to get it up for you at all!"

He gave a mocking laugh. "Who said it was you that got it up for me? You really didn't think I was thinking about you did you? Aw baby girl, that's kind of cute but don't flatter yourself."

I pushed myself to my feet once more. "You know, I can't believe I loved you once."

He smirked. "And I can't believe you ever thought I could love a washed up little messenger girl like you, baby girl."

I was past trying to make sense with words now. Instead I leant back and my arm came round to hit him again. He caught it easily and sneered down at me. My body took over from my brain, and I kneed him in the groin. Even as angry as I was, I still couldn't bring myself to really hurt him and I pulled it a little, although it still had to be pretty bad.

"Fucking BITCH!" he ground out, leaning over and gripping tightly to my hand. I tried to pull back but his grip was far too strong. Slowly he raised himself up to his full height and stepped up, standing right over me, glaring down. I gritted my teeth against the pain in my hand where he was gripping it so tightly.

"You going to hit me?" I got out between clenched teeth.

"I wouldn't waste my time on it. Have fun on your own, little girl." He stepped back from me, looking around the table and suddenly an evil little grin came over his face. I stood, clenching and unclenching my fist to try and get some circulation back in it and watched him walk round the table and throw himself into a seat next to Annie. He put an arm round her and whispered into her ear, glancing back at me with a smirk. I narrowed my eyes as Annie stood and began to make her way round towards me.

As soon as she got near enough she tackled me and took me down to the floor, pulling my hair and scratching. I had never learned to bitch fight and retaliated with a couple of punches to the side of her head. She made a pathetic mewling sound and rolled to the side, scratching my face as she went, and then tried to crawl away.

"No you fucking don't!" I ground out as I grabbed her and dragged her back. I needed something to take out all the anger and hurt I was now feeling on, and Annie happened to be the closest thing that was pissing me off right at that moment. She scratched at me again, trying to get me to let go. I punched her again and she started to try and slap me around the face in retaliation. I grabbed her by the hair, two great big handfuls of it. "Fucking try it, I dare you."

"Fucking bitch!" she panted. "Why don't you whore yourself to the staff? Leave the wrestlers to the big shots!" I pulled my head back and gave her a good old-fashioned Glaswegian kiss. Judging by the noise when my forehead hit her face, I thought I might have broken her nose. I climbed to my feet, ignoring her shouts, and smoothed my hair back before looking at the scowl on Mark's face.

"Anything else?" I tried to regain my breath as I stood there watching him.

"Tell you what, Jade. You stay on the staff and I'll stay on the talent, we'll keep things the way they should be."

"Talent? Always thought that was an interesting choice of word put up against some of you lot," I mused.

He stood and leant over the table towards me. "You'd be back in my bed in a flash if I asked you, darlin'. You know I've got the talent. I can see it in your eyes now darlin', you want me."

I shook my head. "Now who's trying to flatter themselves?"

"Who are you kidding, Jade? Not me and not yourself." He leaned slightly further forward and gave a rattle of his tongue bar in my ear. I dropped my head forward for a second and then raised it back up.

"That's all you've got."

He narrowed his eyes at me. "You'd love to see what else I've got but I refuse to lower myself to your standards anymore. Do you really think I'm going to scrape the bottom of the barrel and even consider you again? I'm through screwing the help."

I shook my head once more. "You seem to have mistaken me for someone who gives a flying fuck."

"Try saying that without hurt in your eyes, baby girl."

"I'm through wasting my time speaking to you," I said, turning away from him slightly.

He sat back down and gave a laugh. "That's it. Jade, run off like a scolded little dog with their tail between your legs. It's what you do best. After all, that's how you ended up in this job ain't it, darlin'? Although do you even think you'd have got past the probation period without my influence? Why do you think Peter was quick to keep you on huh? You're worthless, Jade. No one wants you. You couldn't even make it as a hooker coz no one would pay to tap that."

Dave's voice came out loudly from behind me. "Watch your fucking mouth, Calaway."

Mark stood and moved to go nose to nose with Dave. "This ain't none of your business, Batista. Besides, she ain't good enough in bed to stand up for like that. How long you been screwing her, Dave? A month? Two? I bet that's what you were doing when you saved her alcoholic ass."

"I've never screwed her. She's the best fucking friend I've had in a long time." The tension and pure testosterone in this little scene were spiralling up out of control. It was fast becoming clear that there could be a fight and everyone seemed powerless to try and stop it.

I pushed my way in between them. "Stop it!" I shouted. "He's not worth the effort, Dave."

"Need a woman to fight your battles now little boy?" Mark sneered. "The big bad deadman too big and strong for little Dave?"

"Get out of the way, Jade," Dave said in a very quiet voice.

"Yeah Jade, do what lover girl wants."

"You ever known a woman you didn't fuck?" Dave asked in an almost conversational tone.

"You ever been able to keep a woman? We all know why your wife left you, Dave, coz you just weren't good enough. Jade'll get bored of you just like she did me and you'll be all on your own again. She's had her taste of the fame and money. Half the world knows who she is because of me. She had a hand in your divorce too didn't she?" He smirked again, seemingly enjoying himself.

Dave pushed up closer, his face right in Mark's. "That shit had nothing to do with her and you fucking know it."

"Oh right, I forgot. Your wife left you because you were a worthless excuse for a husband. Couldn't you satisfy your wife, Batista? Not man enough for her? Heck, maybe I should give her a call and let her know what a real man's like."

"Leave my wife out of this," Dave growled.

"Don't you mean ex wife? Touched a nerve, have I?"

And that was how it started. Dave swung for him. Mark ducked and threw a punch into Dave's stomach, moving me out of the way with his arm. Dave came back and tackled him and they crashed down onto the table with Mark throwing punches at Dave's head. It was all a bit of a blur to me. I could make out some of what was going on from the furious throwing of punches that was going on, but it didn't last long before Glen waded in and pulled Mark away.

"Get a fucking grip, Mark," he shouted, almost falling over with the effort of keeping Mark away. Adam and John Cena grabbed Dave as he got to his feet to stop him launching himself at Mark again. "Will someone fucking help me with him?" Glen called as his grip began to slip. Big Show hurried over to help him out. Mark suddenly threw the two of them off and dived at Dave again, taking him, Adam and Cena down onto the broken table. There was another fast flurry of blows and it seemed like half the table were suddenly trying to get hold of Mark and haul him off.

"Will someone get him the fuck out of here!" I shouted at the top of my voice. It took most of the table and some of the bouncers from the bar, but finally they managed to get him away and out of the door. Dave spat some blood out and made a move to follow.

"Mother FUCKER!" he bellowed. I put a hand on his arm, which he totally ignored in his fury. "I'm gonna fucking kill him!"

"Dave, please!" I said, tugging on his arm. His head snapped round towards me, and I took half a step backwards at the look on his face. "Just leave him to them for now." He looked back in the direction that the others had gone and growled low in his throat. "Stop it!" I burst out, becoming a little emotional by that point.

"I can't just let him get away with that, Jade!" He wiped away more blood that was trickling down his chin.

I was starting to shake as the adrenaline left my body. "Can we please just go?" He didn't move, just staring at the door for a while and then began to move towards it. My hand dropped from his arm.

He stopped and looked back at me. "Are you coming or what?" I nodded quickly and followed him out of the door.

It was a short but tense trip back to the hotel. Where the others had dragged Mark to I had no idea but there was no sign of any of them when we got outside. Once back at the hotel, Dave stormed into his room, banging the door hard against the wall. I followed him in slightly warily, wincing when he grabbed a lamp and smashed that against the wall.

"Fucking asshole!" he exclaimed, throwing anything he could get his hands on and then punching the wall.

"Dave, please..." I began hesitantly. "Stop it! It's not worth it." He growled and spun round to face me. I took a step backwards at the intense fury on his face.

"He had no fucking right to say what he did! Any of it. I'm going to finish what I started." He went to move towards the door. I got in front of him, shaking my head. "Why are you protecting him, Jade? He fucking deserves it!" He looked at me steadily for a few seconds. "You think I can't take him?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to." He punched the wall suddenly and rested his head against it. "God damn it! Even you think I'm a fucking pussy!"

"I don't. I don't want either of you hurt." He lifted his head a little to look at me, showing a small smear of blood. "And right now you're scaring me a little."

"Can't fucking do anything right for anyone can I?" He sighed and sagged against the wall looking a little defeated. "I'm sorry, Jade. I don't want you to be scared of me."

I managed a small smile and moved towards him slightly. "It'll pass soon enough. I've just never seen you like this."

"When I saw you two talking I kept my eye on you, then when I saw you getting upset I lost it, and when I heard what he was saying..." He sighed again. "I'm sorry. I did exactly what he wanted me to do."

"He knows how to play the game," I said quietly, thinking that nothing had ever felt less like playing to me than that had. Dave sat heavily on the bed and put his head in his hands. "Let me take a look at you," I muttered, desperate for something to take my mind off what Mark had said.

"I'm fine," he said obstinately. "I've had worse." I ignored him and went to get some stuff to at least get the blood off him with. He looked up at me suddenly when I came back over to him. "You didn't get hit did you? You were between us… and… I... oh god Jade please don't say you got hurt!"

"I'm fine. He pushed me out of the way." Dave's eyebrows raised quickly. "No matter what else, he doesn't hit women, Dave. He tried to send Annie to do that for him."

He looked slightly shocked. "I missed that, hope you gave her a good seeing to."

"I think I broke her nose." He chuckled quietly. "I may not be a wrestler, but then she is only a diva. And I was never taught to bitch fight. Punched her a couple of times and then head butted her in the face."

"Ouch, she's going to feel that tomorrow."

I shrugged. "I should think so. I heard it crack."

He chuckled again and then looked down, seeing the blood on his shirt. "Aw damn, this was my favourite shirt."

"Take it off. Might still be able to do something with it." I wasn't hopeful, but it was worth a try. He undid the first few buttons and then pulled it over his head, throwing over a nearby chair. Grinning suddenly he looked up at me.

"So nurse Jade gonna tend to my wounds?"

"Uh huh, once she's got your shirt in soak, yeah. Not going to wear the uniform though." I had to laugh when I heard him mutter 'Damn it.' "I'll be right back," I said, disappearing into the bathroom. I came back out and returned to the stuff I had fetched earlier. "Let's have a look at you then." He sat up straight so I could get a good look at him. I began to wipe the blood off and winced at some of the bruises starting to come up. "Someone else is going to feel some bruises in the morning." He just smiled and looked up at me. Eventually I dropped the towel I had been using. "There you go, all done."

"Already? I was just starting to enjoy that."

"You just like having someone fussing over you," I said in a mock stern voice. He shrugged.

"Not going to deny that." He sighed suddenly. "Come here." He put his arms round me and pulled me into his lap for a hug, resting his forehead on my shoulder. "I kind of got scared back there though, I only remembered after it was over that you were between us."

"He wouldn't hit me. Even with everything else, he still wouldn't do that." I snuggled in to make myself comfortable, drawing comfort from him. Every one of Mark's words had found their target unerringly, leaving me feeling unwanted and that no one would ever want me.

Dave moved his forehead into the crook of my neck. "I'm sorry I went off like that."

I tried to lighten the atmosphere in the room. "And they say chivalry is dead," I said with a small laugh. I tried to ignore the goose bumps that rose as he moved his face in my neck, rubbing the stubble against the sensitive skin.

"I shouldn't have done it though. I fell right into his trap." He gave a bitter laugh.

I snorted sarcastically. "Big evil."

Dave's laugh was more genuine this time. "More like big dumb ass."

I tapped him lightly round the back of his head. "Hey! That doesn't reflect too well on me."

He raised his head and looked up at me, giving a squeeze around my waist with his arms. "You know I didn't mean it like that," he grinned. I just raised my eyebrows and stared down at him. He squeezed again and laughed.

"Don't squeeze the merchandise." He did it again and stuck his tongue out. "Oi! I've told you before about waving that at me."

He released me a little, laughing. "Hey, you were pretty tough though. Resisted the great tongue rattle."

"First time for everything I guess." He grinned and gave a rattle. I shivered violently.

"First and only time," he laughed.

"Not quite true actually..." I mused.

Dave rested his forehead against the side of my head. ""Why's that?" I told him the bare details of the battle of wills Mark and I had gone through when I was on suspension. "Remind me to never piss you off," he said, wincing. "I don't think I want to know how it ended."

I gave a nasty little grin. "With him on his knees." He laughed and absently mindedly rattled his tongue bar along his teeth again. I shivered and glared at him. "Get that thing under control." He looked at me in confusion. "The damn tongue bar. You're going to drive me out of my tiny little mind."

"Oh, I don't know I'm doing it half the time." He gave a long rattle and grinned at me. I dropped my head in against his shoulder, biting my lip. He chuckled and scooted up the bed to lean on the headboard, taking me with him. He stretched out his legs and sighed. "That's better." I took a little while longer to settle, confused at the sudden tension that went through his body as I made myself comfortable. Finally I found a spot I was happy with and leaned my head in against his neck. I felt him relax and he began to stroke my arm lazily. "Penny for your thoughts?" he said quietly after a while.

I had been going over all that had been said that day, in both of the arguments I had gone through with Mark. "You'd want change," I muttered finally. "They're fairly predictable." I had been through some rocky relationships in the past, and things had happened that had left me feeling less than good about myself. Damian had been a prime example of that. The whole time I had been with him had been like being on self-destruct. Everyone had known that something would have to blow some when – it had just been a matter of trying to work out when. I had escaped before that had happened but in a way that had left me feeling cheap and nasty ever since. Those thoughts had been further from my mind of late but now had come flooding back full force.

What if Mark was right? What if I was destined to live a cold, lonely life? He was the second man to have said something similar to me and I was beginning to fear that it might come true. I was fast becoming used goods, something that no one would ever want. In my mind I was already losing the battle. I already half believed what he had said.

Dave tipped his head on one side. "You sure you're smart? You don't seem to be too good at math."

I summoned a laugh from somewhere and gave him an elbow in the stomach. "Don't start!"

"Oof!" he protested. "Hey now!" He gave a warning tickle to my sides. I squirmed to escape his fingers and felt him tense again.

"No more tickling," I said, giving him a quizzical look. "Are you sure you're OK?"

"Alright you win, no more tickling... for now," he laughed. I knew that tone of voice. It meant that trouble was coming, and probably soon. Sure enough, a couple of seconds later he jabbed a finger in my side.

I sat up quickly and crossed my arms, glaring at him. "You did not just poke me!"

He contemplated the ceiling in mock thought. "You know, I think I just did." He did it again, quickly, several times in succession and it soon turned to tickling. The real bugger of it was that, so far, I hadn't managed to find a single ticklish spot on him. One touch of a finger to my ribs and I was a giggling helpless mass with no way of fighting back. He threw me on my back and leant over me, still tickling for all he was worth. I threw my bodyweight against him in an attempt to shift him; something that had no real hope of working but it was all I could think of to try.

"Brute!" I managed to choke out giggling as I pushed against him with everything I had. He almost lost his balance.

"Wriggly little shit, ain't you?" he growled.

"Yep," I agreed, shoving again. He teetered on the edge of balance and I pushed again, sensing an as yet unheard of victory. He fell back, grabbing me and pulling me with him.

"If I'm going down you're coming with me!" I landed on him, laughing stupidly fit to bust, and that didn't stop when he carried right on tickling. He finished with another poke to the side and I fell over, almost physically unable to laugh any more. "I win," he grinned.

"Still a bully," I muttered, heaving in great deep breaths of air.

"Still won," he shrugged. I poked my tongue out at him quickly, enjoying the immature battle. He did the same, but accompanied by a long rattle from his tongue bar.

I scowled at him. "Not only a bully but a cheat as well."

"Oh come on, how did I cheat?"

"You know perfectly well what I mean."

He did it again. "Don't have a clue."

I lay back and crossed my arms, still scowling. "Not listening!"

He leant up close to my ear and did it again. "Still have no idea what you're on about." I took in a sharp quick breath at it being so close. Dave being Dave took the opportunity to tease me further. "What's wrong, Jade?" He repeated the rattling yet again. I let my eyes fall shut and bit my lip, hard. My whole body tensed and I became acutely aware of how close he was to me. "What's the matter, honey?" he asked in a low deep voice. I opened my eyes and stared at him.

"You know what you're doing." He did it again. I could tell he was still playing the game but I was rapidly getting past the point of playing. "I can't hold out much longer," I whispered. I knew what was going through his mind. He thought this was a ruse to try and win the game. There was a hint of something in his eyes though, as if maybe he could feel the atmosphere in that room changing in the same way that I could.

"Hold out on what?" he asked in that same deep voice.

I closed my eyes again. "Jesus, Dave..."

"Sounds like you're in a bit of trouble there, honey." He had a crooked grin on his face, still teasing me.

"I'm in a lot of trouble," I murmured. He turned so that he was laying partly over me. I opened my eyes to find him looking directly into them, grinning as he rattled again. My resolve broke and I grabbed the back of his neck, pulling him forward and kissed him fiercely. He didn't react for a few seconds and then returned it briefly before pulling away, breathless.

"You evil wench, you gave me a hard on from hell and that didn't make it much better."

"What the hell do you think you've done to me?" I asked in a thick voice.

"I highly doubt you have something squeezing the hell out of your pants right now," he smirked.

"No, but I sure as hell have something giving me grief." He looked down at me for a few moments before letting out a sigh, accompanied by an accidental rattle that caused me to fidget under his weight.

"If you're going to hate me for this you better stop me now coz I'm on my last bit of self control." His voice dropped to a husky whisper, as he looked me directly in the eyes. "I can't hold out much longer, Jade. I want you so much right now that it hurts, believe me it hurts."

His words shot through my brain driving all other thoughts out of my head. "Dave, I..."

He leaned the side of his head against mine and spoke over the top of me, his voice a little strained. "I'm losing the battle honey, give me the word and I'll stop fighting."

"I can't fight it," I muttered, seemingly unable to move.

He leant his face up close to mine and stared me directly in the eye once more. "Last chance."

"I don't want to fight it," I said clearly, returning his gaze. He made a sound that was halfway between a groan and a growl, crashing his lips down to mine almost desperately. He pulled away once more to shift his bulk over me more fully and I gazed up into his face once more.

"Make me feel…"


	26. Chapter 26

A/N: There are new adult themes popping up in this chapter. I am fully aware that I may not be too popular with some people after this one, but bear with me guys...

I was woken from a deep sleep by something brushing against me. I turned over, mumbling some random thing about not wanting to get up yet. I heard a male voice mutter something and opened my eyes, blinking at the light. Looking up, I saw Davewatching me.

"Hey," he said softly. I frowned slightly as the last of the dream clouded thoughts flashed across my mind. He sighed gently and looked bothered by my frown.

"I was dreaming," I said quietly.

"What about?" He turned on his side to face me, getting comfortable. I shifted to face him, stopping suddenly when my arm brushed over the skin at the front of my hip. My _naked _skin. "Wasn't a dream, huh?" he whispered.

"It doesn't look like it," I said finally. "Wow," I breathed, moving to lie flat on my back

"Yeah, wow," he echoed, rolling on to his stomach.

"What have we done?"

"I don't know," he replied, his face in the pillow so his words came out muffled.

"This is a little weird." I could honestly say that it was a situation I had never contemplated being in. In some kind of parallel universe it could have been all my dreams come true, but right there and then it felt like my worst nightmare.

"I should have kept it in my pants," Dave groaned.

I thought for a moment. "Believe I may have helped out with that."

"God, we've fucked up so much."

"Not the brightest thing we've ever done," I agreed.

He groaned again. "Twice!"

"Yeah, twice," I sighed.

He flipped suddenly over onto his back and put his hands in his hair. "Oh god!"

I sat up and wrapped my arms around my knees, shaking my head slightly. "He can't help us now."

Dave looked over at me and then back up at the ceiling. "I can't help but feel so guilty."

I took a deep breath. "You and me both."

A worried looked flashed across his features. "Are things going to change between us?"

I wiped a hand down over my face before looking back over at him. It was a heartbreaking thought. "I really don't know. I hope not but this is a big thing we've done."

He closed his eyes. "You're one of the best friends I've ever had. I can't lose you," he said quietly.

It was killing me to have to have this conversation with him. I couldn't see any way in which what we had done was not going to change things. We had markedly overstepped the bounds of friendship… and as he had said, twice. I couldn't bear the atmosphere any more and cracked a weak joke to try and break it.

"What sort of mess could I get myself into without you?"

He opened his eyes and flashed me a very small grin, but a grin nonetheless. "None."

I smiled gently. "You underestimate my capacity for attracting shit, although you do generally help." He pulled a face and smacked my arm lightly. "Don't start," I warned with a gentle laugh. He simply did it again and stuck his tongue out.

_He shifted his weight fully over me, kissing me with a barely contained ferocity that promised much more to come. Sliding one knee between my thighs he pushed at them, moving quickly into the space I made for him, pressing fully against me. I arched up into the contact, urged on by the low growl that rumbled in his throat as I pushed my groin up into his. Rearing up away from me he made short work of removing my top and bra, leaving me half naked under his intense scrutiny. Shifting down he caught a nipple in his mouth and I could feel him smirk at my hissing breath when he flicked the tongue bar over the sensitive flesh. Trailing the little lump of metal down my body to where I wanted it most, holding me down with his hands on my hips as I nearly left the bed, groaning his name at the intense pleasure. Stripping the remainder of my clothes from me before quickly peeling his pants off and covering me again with his body, kissing me and letting me taste myself in his mouth._

_"Make me feel…" A long slow movement to enter, leaving me savouring every sensation. Legs wrapped high around his waist, arms wrapped around his neck, pulling upwards to get as close as possible. Biting my lip as gentleness turned to passion and intensity, moving with him as I really began to feel. Wondering how something so wrong could feel so right. Knowing that I could choose this future. Knowing also that I could not._

_Fingers entwined as the peak approached, my face buried in his neck as the first helpless sounds were forced from my throat. Feeling the vibrations through his chest as he spoke words I couldn't make out. Turning my face away as my orgasm washed over me, hiding the tears that accompanied it. All this could have been mine. It was there for the taking. Once upon a time it would have been all I had ever wanted and more. It broke my heart to know that all of this was there but that this was as close as I would ever let myself get._

I shivered slightly. "Put that away."

He looked confused for a moment and then realised what he was doing and quickly pulled his tongue back in. "Sorry," he muttered sheepishly.

"I guess things are going to be very different, for a while at least," I said after a silence that seemed to stretch forever.

"I guess so." He wouldn't look at me.

"Oh hell," I whispered.

"We'll get over it though...right?" He turned towards me, an anxious look in his eyes.

"I hope so. Eventually." The last word came out reluctantly but it had to be spoken.

He gave a sigh. "I guess we'd better get up."

"Mmm," I agreed. "Yeah. I think I have some things I need to sort out." He gave me a questioning look. "Somewhere to sleep," I elaborated.

"You can stay here. I'll sleep on the floor," he said quickly.

"I don't think that would be such a great idea. Not for a while at least."

He sighed again. "Alright, but I get the bathroom first." He smiled but it was clearly forced.

I tried to lighten the atmosphere a little, unable to cope with the seriousness of what we had done for a while. "Age before beauty."

"Exactly." He pulled the covers back and climbed out of the bed, grabbing the first piece of clothing that came to hand to cover his nakedness. He moved quickly across the room and into the bathroom. I lay back down and covered my face with a pillow. A loud bang came from the bathroom and I shot back upright, throwing the pillow to one side.

"Dave?"

"Yeah?" he called after a few seconds.

"It'll be OK." I didn't know if I was trying to reassure him or myself, or possibly both. Right at that point, much as I wanted to believe it, I had no idea how it could ever possibly be alright again. The only reply I got from him was the sound of the shower starting.

_Warm water flowing around me and warm hands gliding over my skin. Less urgency but an intense depth of feeling. A muffled curse followed by gentle laughter as the cold tiles met the skin of my back. A sensation of being effortlessly lifted, head dropping back against the wall as he lowered me down slightly, positioning me exactly to his liking. Whispered exchanges of encouragement and guidance, a whole new learning experience of another's body. Marks left in flesh from fingernails being dug in as pleasure increased. An ironic smile to myself at the thought of seeing the animal truly unleashed._

_A wave of tiredness washing over me as I dried myself slowly, catching him watching me. Someone that proved to me that I was still wanted, desired. None of it was true; it was all smoke and mirrors, lies and deceptions. Crossing the room to the bed and going to sleep safely wrapped in someone's arms. Drifting off to sleep, secure in the knowledge that I was loved._

I shook my head fiercely to dispel the thoughts that would get me absolutely nowhere. Throwing back the covers I got up and dragged a T-shirt and jeans out of my belongings, pulling them on quickly before gathering my things together. I knew that leaving was the right thing to do. There was no way I could stay with him now. The temptation would be too much after that first time. I couldhave becomeaddicted to him if I didn't leave then. That would have been unfair on everybody.

"You're going then?" I jumped, as I hadn't heard him come out. I turned to see him standing behind me, dripping wet with a towel wrapped round his waist, running his hand through his wet hair.

"I think I'd better."

He nodded. "Do I at least get a hug before you go?"

I gave a small smile. "Yeah, of course." I walked over to him and into his arms, feeling them wrap round me to hug me tightly to him. My own arms went round him and I whispered quietly. "It's only for a while."

"A while too long," he said in a tight sounding voice.

I rested my head against his chest. "I know."

He swallowed and stepped away. "Go on, you better get going."

I nodded and picked up my stuff. "I'll see you around."

Ever the gentleman, he opened the door for me. "See you, honey." I smiled at him sadly and stepped outside. The door closed behind me and there was a small thud from inside the room, as if something had hit the wood.

It didn't take long to get another room and I was soon dropping my bags by the bed. Sinking onto the edge of it, I dropped my head into my hands. I tried to fight the tears that came but it was useless. All of the emotion from the day before and what had just happened hit me like a truck and I curled up on the bed, a tight ball of misery.

I wasn't given long to wallow in it though. I was summoned to the arena. That was the one aspect of the whole affair I hadn't contemplated by that point. There had been that huge fight in the club, including me injuring a diva. I realised some form of punishment had to be heading my way, towards the four of us that had been involved.

I was summoned in to the office and questioned at some length over what had happened. I told them the truth, as much as I was able. That Mark and I had been fighting and Dave had stepped in to try and separate us. When asked about what I had done to Annie, my innate honesty would not allow me to say I regretted it, although I did say that it had been a mistake. I left that room with a severe caution and a written warning on my record. To highlight the seriousness of the situation I was warned that any more misdemeanours on my part would lead to me getting fired. I saw Dave waiting outside as I left and threw him a small smile as I went past, still unable to face him for any length of time.

The next couple of days were very strange compared to the pattern of life I had become used to. I kept very much to myself whenever possible although some of my friends would come and check on me from time to time, to make sure I was OK. In the last few months I had always been able to go to either Mark or Dave when I had felt low. All of a sudden neither of them were there and, in Dave's case, that was my fault. All in all as they days went by, the phone call I had made to Damian looked more and more like a good idea.

The stuff I had asked him to send me arrived a few days after it had all blown up. The emotional swings had not been getting any better. In fact, they had grown worse and I was really struggling to cope. I took the package upstairs to the privacy of my room and opened it, staring down at the contents for a long time. This was stuff I had thought I would never get involved in although I knew it all well enough from the time I had spent with Damian. I couldn't hide at the bottom of a bottle again though, so this seemed like the only answer.

I held off on using the package's contents until the next day. I got to the arena and tried to manage without for a while but I couldn't seem to get going. Grabbing my bag, I retreated into a toilet cubicle at the far end of the arena and contemplated what I was about to do. I sat and looked at the little white paper ball in the palm of my hand, compulsively twisting the top of the little package.

"Come on, Jade, you need this to get you through this," I muttered to myself, closing my eyes and popping it into my mouth, swallowing quickly before I could back out of it. I sat there for a while, just thinking about everything that was going on in my life and started to feel the buzz that Damian had told me about so often as the speed did its thing. Once that happened, I left the bathroom and walked through the hallways, a little faster than usual. Reaching into my pocket I grabbed a pair of sunglasses and put them on, noticing the shaking of my hands as I did so. I made it to the office and found that there was no one there. Settling myself behind the desk I heard the music from the sound tests and shivered as goose bumps rose on my skin and a rush went through my body. "Oh God!" I sighed happily.

I heard footsteps come into the office and then stop suddenly. "Oh, I wanted Karen." My head jerked up at the voice and I turned to face Mark.

"She's sorting Adam out," I said quickly, pointing to the note she had left on the desk.

He frowned down at me. "How long is she going to be?"

"About an hour." I twitched suddenly and started to fiddle with a pen, the first thing that came to hand.

His frown deepened. "What the hell's wrong with you?" I adjusted the sunglasses on my face and just stared at him. "You're wearing those inside. Doesn't make any sense."

"I didn't sleep too well last night, my eyes hurt," I replied quickly. He stared down at me and I could tell what was going through his mind. "It's not a hangover." A frown came over my face then and my foot began to tap quickly on the floor. "Do you have any chewing gum?" I asked suddenly.

"Uh, yeah?" He looked totally surprised at the change of subject.

"Can I have some?" He looked puzzled but handed it over. I took out a couple of pieces and put them in my mouth, chewing fast, before handing the rest of the packet back and starting to compulsively arrange the papers on the desk. "So what was it you needed?"

He had to think for a second before he remembered. "The timetable for the appearances." There was still a frown on his face.

I shuffled the papers faster than usual and held out a copy of the timetable with a shaking hand. The techs turned up the volume on the sound checks and I gripped at the table with my free hand, closing my eyes. I opened them again to see Mark taking the paper from my hand and looking at me hard.

"If it's not a hangover then what's got you acting like this?"

"Like what?" I asked quickly, a little paranoid.

"You're just... off," he said finally.

"I'm just tired. Besides it's got nothing to do with you anymore. You made quite sure of that." I grabbed a bottle of water from the desk and took a long drink, glancing up to see him still watching me suspiciously. "I'm tired, Mark. Surely you know what that's like." I was still arranging and rearranging the papers, picking them up and putting them away. "No one ever keeps this place tidy," I grumbled.

"Never bothered you before."

"Well it bothers me now." I continued to tidy up, getting to my feet and walking around Mark to move things. He watched me for a few seconds and I stopped in front of him. "Why are you even pretending to give a shit, Mark?"

He gave me a strange slightly angry look. "Because you need to do your job," he spat.

"And I did it, didn't I? You wanted the timetable and I gave it to you."

"You know what? Forget I even mentioned it."

"It's forgotten just like I've forgotten you." I turned away from him.

"Don't walk away from me!" he growled, grabbing my arm. I almost lost my footing as a rush hit and I shivered at the contact. "What the hell is going on, Jade?" he asked, looking at my arm in his hand.

"Let go of me." I tried to pull my arm away and closed my eyes briefly at the friction it caused.

He grabbed my other arm. "Not until you tell me what's going on."

I breathed deeply and closed my eyes again. "God... let me go!" He pulled me a little closer to look at me. I clenched my jaw to stop the twitching I could feel in it and looked away from him. "I mean it, Mark. Let me go." My entire body was shaking from the rushes coursing through, caused by the contact. He finally let go, shaking his head. I stepped back and leant against the table, watching him warily as he picked up the timetable and sighed deeply. Turning away from him I tried to catch my breath and control the rush still crashing over me.

"You need help. You're acting like you're not right in the head," he muttered.

"Yeah? And who made me like that?" I shot back.

"I don't have the patience for this," he growled.

"You don't have the patience for anything." I laughed, my teeth chattering together, and clamped my mouth closed trying to hold the laughter in. "I slay myself sometimes."

"You really are fucked up," he said quietly.

"Like I said babe, who made me like this?" He growled once more deep in his throat and turned to leave. "Wait," I called urgently. He turned back with an angry look that I completely ignored. "Can I have the rest of your chewing gum?" He shook his head, an angry frown on his face but dug the packet out of his pocket and threw it to me. I caught it, grinning, and turned away from him, quickly forgetting that he was there as I hummed to myself and tapped my foot along to the music that I hadn't noticed stop playing a little while before.

It became easier each time to take the drugs, whether it was speed or pills, and I grew to rely on them more and more to be able to get through the days. Unfortunately it wasn't long before I bumped into Mark again shortly after taking some.

I was walking along the hallway towards catering. Everything I did while on the drugs was done at a faster pace and I was developing a tendency towards finding the strangest things funny. That was why I started laughing when I passed Mark in the hallway reading off a piece of paper and muttering to himself. He looked up when he heard the laughing and frowned.

"Talking to yourself?" I giggled.

"No, I'm reading."

"Didn't sound like it."

He folded up the paper and looked at me, frown deepening. "What is so damn funny?" I burst out laughing properly again. "That's it." He grabbed my arm and dragged me down the hall. I closed my eyes and stumbled alongside him, shivering. He pushed me into a nearby room and slammed the door behind us. "Now what the hell is wrong with you? And why are you shaking so damn much?"

I clicked my fingers nervously. "I'm cold?"

He looked around the room. "We're in the boiler room. Try again."

I looked away, mind churning. "Not sleeping."

"Bullshit." He stepped right up to me. "Now tell me the truth. Jade. What's going on?"

I backed away from him. "Nothing!"

He frowned again and took a step towards me. "I'm not buying it, baby girl."

I took two quick steps backwards. "Stay away from me."

"What the hell for?" He moved forwards again.

I backed right up against the wall. "Just stay away! It has nothing to do with you any more."

"It has everything to do with me," he replied quietly.

I glanced down at the ground, tapping my foot. "No, you made it pretty clear." I peeked back up at him and saw him watching how fast my foot was moving.

"Jade, you're starting to scare me."

I laughed and ducked to the side, trying to get round him. "Me scare you? That's rich."

"Don't walk away from me," he growled, going to grab my arm.

A broad grin came across my face and I slapped his arm. "You're it!" He looked at me, confused. "You're it, silly. Tag?" I explained.

"Jade, tell me what the hell is going on, now! You're acting like you've lost your mind! And take those fucking sunglasses off." He reached for them. "Give me those." I grabbed on to them and tried to get past him again. He got hold of me by the arm and pulled me right up to him. "Take them off or I'll take them off for you." I just caught my breath and shivered as soon as he touched me. He looked hard at me for a moment. "This ain't right."

I snorted. "Ain't left either."

"Jade, stop it," he said softly.

"I'm not doing anything. Let go of me!" He suddenly grabbed the sunglasses and ripped them from my face. I screwed my eyes shut and giggled again.

"Nooo! I'm melting... melting!"

"What the…? Jade, open your eyes," he said in a suspicious tone. I shook my head vigorously. "Girl, if I have to pin you down and pry them open I will."

Again I snorted laughter. "Aw, but I want to go on top!"

"Damn it, Jade, you can't keep your eyes closed for ever!"

I hung my head. "I can try."

He took hold of me by the chin and forced my head up so he was looking straight into it. "I've got all day, darlin'." I blinked quickly as my eyelids were getting twitchy and screwed my eyes shut again. "What the fuck is wrong with your eyes? Open them." I shook my head rapidly. "Fucking open them!" he shouted. I jumped and my eyes flew open. He dragged my under the light, tilting my head up before putting his hand over my eyes and moving it away again. "What have you done, baby girl?" he whispered.

I laughed. "Well, I'm not drunk!"

Mark tried the hand thing again. "Baby girl, your pupils are huge and they ain't budging. Now what the hell have you done?" There was a desperate edge to his voice.

I grasped for an excuse. "Eye infection. Drops."

"Whatever you're doing to yourself, you need to stop." He made as if to move away from me but clearly wasn't sure whether to leave me. I shook my head angrily at what he was implying. "I'm going to Vince," he ground out finally.

"Don't do that!" I said urgently.

"If you've not done anything then what's the problem?"

I fidgeted. "I just don't want you to."

"Tough shit," he ground out, letting go of me and storming out of the room.

I thought desperately for a few seconds before a glimmer of something Damian had once told me came into my mind. I ran as fast as I could to catering and drank as much orange juice as I could force down. It didn't take long before I could feel myself coming down, feeling tired and cold and just generally shitty. It also wasn't long before I heard a voice behind me.

"Jade? Can I talk to you for a minute?" I turned to see Vince McMahon approaching me with Mark beside him.

I took a deep breath. "Uh, sure."

"I'm going to ask you something and I want to know the truth. Have you taken anything?"

I tried for a puzzled look. "No."

"Give me your hand." I held my hand out slowly. Vince felt the minor shaking still in it and looked at me with raised eyebrows.

I yawned suddenly. "Sorry, not been sleeping well recently."

"Can you step under the light and look up at it for a second?" I did as he asked. He stepped closer to me and did the same thing Mark had done, sighing when he was satisfied. Mark, I don't know what you were thinking but you were wrong. I'm sorry Jade, I have to take these things seriously."

"That's fine, I understand," I said, stepping back slightly.

Mark reacted angrily. "That is bullshit! She did something, she was acting out of her mind and her pupils were dilated to fuck!"

"Mark! She is acting normal if not a little tired and her pupils are a little dilated but they're reacting! I'll have you in my office about this later. Once again I'm sorry Jade." Vince turned and walked away, leaving me with a furious Mark.

He stepped right up to me. "I don't know what you are doing to yourself darlin', but mark my words… I will find out."

A wave of tiredness washed over me and I really didn't want to be there. "Just keep your fucking nose out of my business," I said, irritated.

"I'll be watching you," he growled before turning and stalking away.

I went back to the hotel fairly early that day as I was feeling really bad from the induced come down. I wrapped myself in nearly every bit of warm clothing I could lay my hands on and was drinking water like it was going out of fashion when there was a knock on my room door. I cursed quietly and dragged myself off the bed to open it, finding Dave standing outside.

"Well you look like you've seen better days kid," he commented quietly. He moved to lean on the doorframe. "Am I welcome, honey?"

"Course you are," I said, stepping back to allow him into the room. "I'm not much company at the moment though."

He stepped inside and looked at me intently. "Either you put on a couple of pounds or you're wearing way too many layers."

I picked up a bottle of water and rained it. "I'm just cold, that's all."

He glanced around at the room, obviously feeling how warm it was as he shrugged off his jacket. "Thirsty?"

"Yeah. Give me your jacket?" He gave me a startled look. "Can I have your jacket?"

"Sure," he said uncertainly, holding it out to me. I put it on and wrapped my arms around myself, not missing the look of surprise on his face. I turned away and opened another bottle of water.

"Can I ask you something and you'll promise not to get mad at me?" he asked slowly.

I summoned a tired smile. "Do I ever get mad at you?"

He grinned and sat on the end of the bed. "First time for everything. I'm only going to ask this once because I trust you enough to tell be honest with me first time round." He cleared his throat. "Honey, are you taking drugs?"

"What kind of fucking question is that?" I snapped.

"I'm sorry, its just..."

I interrupted him. "You been talking to Mark?"

He nodded. "He's really worried about you sweetheart."

"Well, then you'll have heard about the little chat I had with Vince."

"Yeah, Mark got pulled up for it."

"Should fucking think so!" I burst out.

"Give me a straight answer, honey," he said softly.

"No, I'm not. Happy?"

He sighed and I could tell he wasn't sure whether or not to believe me. "Yeah."

"Jesus, Dave," I sighed shaking my head and taking another swig from the bottle.

Dave frowned at the amount I was drinking. "Mark really is worried about you, he must be to talk to me after the fight."

"He just likes sticking his nose in other people's business," I sniped.

"Sweetheart, I've never seen him that worried before. Maybe you should talk to him, even if it's just to get him off your back."

I rolled my eyes. "We've already talked and look what he tried to do to me then!"

Dave took hold of my hand and rubbed it gently. "Still a good idea though."

I snatched my hand back, still a little jumpy from the rushes I had felt earlier. "No."

Dave closed his eyes for a second, a pained expression on his face. I knew instantly what he was thinking – that it was because of what had happened between us. He was asking too many questions and knew me too well. I was increasingly uncomfortable with him there.

"Dave, I'm tired and I feel like crap. Now is not a good time to talk about him."

"It was just a suggestion, honey" he sighed. "Consider it dropped." I nodded and took another drink. Dave frowned. "You're drinking a lot, sweetheart."

"I think I might be coming down with something." The sane part of my mind, what little of it was left at that time, hated lying to him of all people but I was way out of my depth at that point and it wasn't the sane part of my mind that had control.

"You want me to go?" He asked quietly.

"I should try and get some sleep I guess."

"Good idea." He stood up to go. Holding his arms out slightly, he tilted his head to the side and looked down at me. "Do I get a hug?"

The memory of the rushes was too recent to be pushed to the back of my mind. "Not the best idea if I'm getting something."

He gave me a sad smile. "Yeah I guess not." He headed to the door and stopped with his hand on the knob. "You know that I'll always be there for you." He turned and looked me in the eyes. "No matter what situation you're in."

I managed a small smile. "Yeah."

"Later, Jade," he sighed, and left. I stared at the door for long minutes after he left, seeing the out that he had just offered me and feeling like complete shit for turning my best friend away like that and lying to him.


	27. Chapter 27

I didn't have to worry about bumping into Mark for too much longer. It wasn't long before he took some time off to fight the custody battle for his daughter. Dave was more of a problem, but with the hectic scheduling it was fairly easy to avoid him. The arguments Mark and I gone through in very public situations gave everyone else a reason for me to be behaving strangely, and boy was I behaving strangely at times. The situation kept lurching along for about another month and miraculously I managed not to get caught, although things did get a little dicey from time to time. Although I didn't really like it, I settled into this new life, the drugs keeping me company while I avoided thinking about my problems.

At the end of that month I had a voicemail message on my phone from Mark, telling me that he wanted to come and speak to me. The idea made me nervous, not least because I knew I didn't dare take anything when he might be likely to show up. He didn't make me wait long. The following day there was a knock on my office door. I called for whoever it was to come in and Mark walked in promptly, shutting the door behind himself. I took a deep breath and pushed my chair away from the desk a little, trying to hide the tiredness and wretchedness I felt as the drugs I had taken earlier left my system.

"You wanted to see me then?" I asked finally, looking slightly to the side of him.

"It's over." He stood in the middle of the small room, watching me intently. For a split second I couldn't speak, convinced that he had found out about what had happened between me and Dave and had come to tell me that he knew.

"What?" I managed to get out eventually.

"The custody battle."

"The… oh, good," I replied.

He nodded and shoved his hands in his pockets. "Yeah, got the decision yesterday."

"And?" I asked quickly. Mark sighed and stared at the floor. "Shit…," I hissed, watching his shoulders slump. He nodded and looked up slowly, allowing me to see the huge grin plastered across his face.

"I got her."

I sagged slightly in my chair with relief. "That was nasty!"

"Sorry darlin'," he chuckled.

"So what now?"

"My little girl's coming home. And me and you can go back to normal." He took a step towards me. I stood up, shaking my head as a slight laugh came out of my mouth.

"Normal…"

Mark stepped right up to me and rested his hands on my hips. "As normal as we can be anyway."

"It's finally over?" I asked in a shaky voice.

"Yeah, baby girl, it's over." He smiled down at me.

Taking a deep breath I leant forward and rested my head against his chest. "Thank God," I breathed softly. A wave of emotion washed over me when he bent and rested his head on the top of mine and I blinked back a few errant tears. I felt his words vibrate through me when he spoke again.

"All we need to do now is a public gettin' back together."

I gave a slight snort. "I think some will find it hard to believe."

"Well, we can't tell everyone this was a hoax darlin'. I'll be had for lyin' in court."

"Yeah, I know," I sighed. "I suppose we start talking civilly and take it up from there." I looked back up at him to see him nod before sliding his arms round me fully. I allowed myself to enjoy the feeling for a few seconds before sighing again and pulling back against his arms. "So maybe doing this here where anyone could walk in wouldn't be such a good idea."

Mark groaned. "But it's been ages."

"So a little while longer shouldn't make much difference."

He sighed and stepped back, letting me go, looking into my face with a slight smirk. "By the end of the night you're gonna be in my room," he growled.

"We'll see...," I replied with a small smile.

"No seein' about it, darlin'," he said, following it with a quick rattle of his tongue bar. I dropped my head a little and shivered violently.

"Better work out where we're going to be seen talking then," I said, lifting my head once more.

"Meet you in catering in fifteen minutes." He flashed me a grin and walked out.

I spent the time in between him leaving and it being my turn to go thinking about what we had done. It had seemed like the easiest thing in the world when he had first suggested the idea. Spend the time round the custody hearing apart, making it look as if we had split permanently. That way I couldn't have harmed his case at all. From that point of view it had obviously worked – he had been awarded custody of his daughter. It had certainly fooled everyone around us. Well apart from those that had actually known about it. We had each agreed that we had to have one person nearby that knew what was going on, so that we could have someone to talk to about it and attempt to keep ourselves sane. Mark had chosen Glen and I, obviously enough, had told Dave. Both had played their parts incredibly well in the fights and arguments that we had gone through. Typically enough it had been me that had been the problem. Looking back to the time I had spent cuddled up to Mark while we had worked out the whole plan, it had seemed like no problem at all to say that we would have a couple of huge public arguments. It had been a different matter when it had come down to standing in front of him, watching that sneer and hearing the never ending slew of insults that came from his mouth.

Shaking myself, I glanced at my watch and saw it was about time for me to move and go see exactly what he had worked out. I walked briskly through the hallways and into catering, almost grinding to a halt on seeing Mark sat at a table talking to Dave. Alarmed at that turn in proceedings, I headed quickly to grab some coffee. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Mark's head lift as he caught sight of me and stopped talking. I stopped walking and fidgeted uneasily under his gaze, not entirely through acting. He got to his feet, still watching me. The noise level went down markedly as people began to notice what was going on and anticipated another fiery public argument. I was frozen, seemingly unable to move as Mark walked towards me and stopped right in front of me. As he reached me the room became virtually silent. The saying was right – you would have been able to hear a pin drop. I swallowed nervously and dragged my eyes up to meet his.

"Things need to change," he began.

"Like what?"

"Like the fact that we can't even be in the same room together."

Realising that I was going to have to spark up a little to make this convincing, I pulleda slight face. "We're both here now."

"How about the fact that we can't seem to have too much of a civilised conversation?" He raised an eyebrow as he looked down at me.

"That much seems to be true," I shrugged.

"I can only think of one way to solve all this." He sniffed and worked his neck from side to side. I lifted my own head slightly.

"Go on." He stepped up closer and stared down at me. In my peripheral vision I could see the onlookers leaning forward in eager anticipation of the fight beginning. Trying to ignore them, I tilted my head back a little and stared him straight in the eye, forcing myself not to react as he moved closer, although even I was surprised when he suddenly kissed me. My fists clenched against his chest in shock for a few seconds, before opening back up. There was the sound of someone gasping and a fork or two clattered on the tabletops as the people watching remembered what had happened the last couple of times we had come face to face in public. Almost forgetting they were there, I slid my hands up over his chest to his shoulders, realising just how much I had missed his touch, his kisses, everything about him.

Mark wrapped his arms around me and lifted his head slightly with a grin. "Think it worked?" he whispered.

I gave him a small smile and whispered my reply. "I think they're in shock." He just chuckled and bent to kiss me again.

As we were both known for the quickness of our tempers and reactions to things, surprise soon gave way to acceptance from the people surrounding us. After all, the whole history of our relationship had been fairly volatile. Picking up our relationship again led me into a whole new world of pretence and deception, symptoms of the person the drugs had turned me into. I loved Mark with just about every part of me, except for that one part held hostage and my irrational mind told me that, no matter what else there was in my life, that one part was more important than all the rest put together. I had never had any inclination towards acting as a career but I all of a sudden found unknown abilities to hide things about myself.

It was a huge relief when we returned to Houston for a few days. Mark was back to spend some time getting his daughter settled. Things were going to be a little complicated there for a while until he could get everything sorted, but his mother was more than happy to help out when he had to be on the road. He had told me back at the beginning that he would retire in an instant if that was what it took to get his daughter, and he was standing firm by that. He had just a little while longer to work out on his contract and then that would be it. Right then he was taking a little time to spend with his daughter before returning to the road and working out the details of his leaving.

I was simply making the most of being able to spend some time at home. I still didn't much like my apartment but it was a refuge from having to pretend I wasn't doing anything. Knowing that Mark was intending to spend time with his daughter, I woke up the morning after getting there and decided to have a bit of a blow out, taking a combination of pills and speed to get a bigger buzz while I was alone and able to. Once I felt the good feelings coming on, I turned on some music and prepared myself for a hell of a time. Between the volume of the music and the drugs coursing through my system, I never heard the knocking on the door. The first I knew of what was going on was when Mark walked in through the door, the spare key to my apartment I had given him a long time before in his hand.

"Jade, I banged on the door for…" He looked up at me quickly. "What the hell is going on?"

"Hey!" I smiled. "Come join the party!"

He walked in, a confused look on his face and kicked the door shut behind him. "Party? On your own?"

"And them over there." I pointed to the corner, where I was convinced a group of people were standing, talking amongst themselves. Mark looked over to where I pointed and then back to me.

"What the fuck? Jade, there's no one there. Baby girl, are you alright?" He walked over to me, taking hold of my hands and looking concerned.

"Dance with me."

"Jade, I…" He started to look around the room but did a sudden double take back towards me. "Your eyes…"

"Come on, dance with me!" I started to bounce on the balls of my feet, trying to get him to move. He ignored me and carried on surveying the room. "Whoa, look out!" I shouted, shoving hard at him. I caught him by surprise and he stumbled backwards, falling on the couch.

"Jade, what the hell?"

"That huge fucking mouse nearly got you." I pointed across the room, eyes wide.

"There is no fucking mouse," he growled, putting a hand on the couch to lift himself up. Although it didn't penetrate my brain at the time, I saw him react as he felt something under his hand.

"S'ok," I shrugged. "I'll just put him back in his hole." I walked across the room, flapping my hands at the rodent only I could see. I turned round to see Mark sat on the edge of the couch, staring at the credit card he'd found under the cushion, next to a packet of cigarette papers. Both were covered in a light dusting of white powder from where I had been making little bombs from the speed. Again, the seriousness of what was happening just didn't get through to me.

"He's gone," I said brightly. "Got any gum?"

He looked at me, struggling to hold his anger, and stood up suddenly. "Drugs making you gurn, baby girl?" He spoke in a low, deadly voice.

"Drugs?" I queried, trying to sound innocent. He held up the credit card and cigarette papers.

"Recognise these? And your jaw's running like a damn piston."

I tried desperately to come up with an excuse, but it came out as something that only made sense to my scrambled brain. "Oh yeah, those! The flappy man gave me some sherbet and said it would make me fly, much better then Red Bull apparently. All I had to do is stick rizzlas to my arms! I was waaaaaay up there." I pointed to the ceiling. "If the window had been open I could have flown all over Houston!"

Mark worked his neck from side to side, dropping the supplies on the couch and walking over to me. "Flyin' huh, baby girl? Sure sounds like fun."

"It is," I giggled. He walked round to the back of me and wrapped his arms around me from behind.

"Think you could make me fly, darlin'?"

I shook my head. "No, it'll only work for me."

"How do you know if you don't let me try baby? You do look like you're havin' fun there, don't want me to get bored do you?"

I frowned. "It's mine."

He poked at me playfully. "Share baby girl, come on we can fly together. Don't ya think that'll be more fun then flyin' on your own?"

"Don't poke me cos the pixie men will cry." I frowned at him again.

"I'm sorry, darlin'." He turned me round in his arms, wrapping his arms back round me and leaning his forehead against mine. "Come on baby girl, I want to meet your new friends. I can't see em without your help. Don't you want me to meet em darlin'?" I tilted my head to the side, thinking about it. Mark reached into his pocket and pulled out some gum, unwrapping it and putting it in my mouth. "That feel better, darlin'?"

"I don't know…" I gave him a doubtful look. He leant right down next to my ear and dragged his tongue bar along his teeth.

"You know I'm sure we could have some fuckin' good sex on your special stuff." I perked up slightly at that idea. "Just think, all those good feelins intensified. We can fly to the stars that way darlin'. You wanna touch a star baby girl?" I put my head on one side again, feeling a little smile forming at the thoughts he was putting in my head. "You could even put it in your pocket and take it home, hell give it a name if you want," he continued.

"Maybe..."

"Don't you want to make me feel good, baby girl?" He leant back and looked down at me. "Only you can do that right now."

I gave a little giggle. "I feel good."

"You want me to feel that good?" He started to dance with me as he spoke. I threw my head back and laughed.

"OK!"

He gave me a small smile. "Go get me somethin', baby girl." I headed into my bedroom and dug through the drawers, pulling out the bag of speed. I looked at the pills for a moment before shoving them back out of sight.

"Hurry up, baby girl, I'm waiting for you." Mark's voice floated through the doorway. I shut the drawers and went back out to him, carrying the bag in front of me. He looked at it and then back up at me. "You got any more than that darlin'? I'm a big boy remember."

"You can't have too much cos I need to save some for the mouse." I pointed vaguely to where I had chased the mouse before.

"Alright baby girl, give it here so I can get a look at it." I handed the bag over slowly. He took it from me and looked down at it. "I hate bein' right," he whispered sadly. He dropped it, looking up and taking hold of my face in his hands. "What have you done to yourself, little girl?"

I looked to the side of him, unable even in that state to bear the look on his face. "Made it all better."

"This is nowhere near better," he growled, trying again to restrain his anger. "Jade, how could you be so god damned STUPID?"

"Don't you yell like that!" I babbled. "You'll scare the pizza."

"Jade, will you stop it! Get a grip, darlin'!"

"What do you want me to grip?" I grinned. He growled loudly in his throat. I pouted, seeing the anger coming close to the surface. "I thought you wanted to fly?"

"I want you to stop this! Baby girl, you're scaring the shit out of me. Where's the rest of it?"

"I have to save some for the mouse!"

"God damn it Jade, tell me or I'll find it my fuckin' self!" he shouted. I twitched away and gave a nervous frown. "Now tell me where the rest is," he continued in a quieter voice.

"What are you going to do with it?"

"Flush it down the fuckin' toilet," he growled.

"No!" I shouted, getting in front of him.

"Move," he demanded. I shook my head quickly. "Jade, move NOW!"

"No, I won't let you do it." He lifted me up by the shoulders and moved me out of the way himself, striding straight into my bedroom and beginning to search through drawers. I saw red and jumped on him, hitting and clawing anything I could reach. He turned away from the drawers and threw me down on the bed. I jumped back up, screaming, and tried to bite him.

"Damn it, Jade!" he shouted. Ripping open another drawer, he found a bag of pills there. "So you're mixin' em? Do you know how fuckin' dangerous that is?"

"Leave them alone!" I tried to grab the bag out of his hands. He pushed me away gently but I went right back at him, slapping at his hands. His patience finally broke and he picked me up, throwing me out of the room and slamming the door shut with himself still in there, barricading it shut. I kicked the door viciously a couple of times, and then the crashing and banging sounds started as he seriously tore the room apart in his search. At that I started throwing myself bodily at the door, trying desperately to get through. It wasn't long before the door flew open again and Mark stepped through it, holding several bags. The room behind him was a scene of total devastation. I ignored that fact and dived straight for the bags in his hand. He held them up out of my reach and side stepped me, heading towards the bathroom. I ran to get in front of him and blocked the doorway, hooking my fingers around each side of the doorframe.

"Jade, these are going even if I have to swallow them my fuckin' self."

"You can't. I need them."

He shook his head. "No you don't, baby girl."

"Yes I do," I insisted.

"Jade, move… please…" There was almost a begging tone to his voice. I was totally fixated on what he held in his hand though, and took no notice.

"I can't let you do it."

"Baby girl, you want me to get down on my knees and beg? Cos right now, I'd do anythin'."

"I'm not moving."

He lowered his head and stepped forward, dropping to his knees and resting his hands on my sides. "Please, baby girl. Let me do this. I can help you. Please, I'm beggin' you, let me help you out of this."

I shook my head. "No."

He dropped his head to lean against my stomach for a second. "I'm sorry then, baby girl, I really am but it's for your own good." He stood up quickly and pulled me out of the way. I fought hard against him. "Jade, stop it, you'll hurt yourself." I launched myself at him, fists flying, and tried to head but him. One flailing fist caught him in the nose and blood began to pour down his face. He finally wrestled me to the floor and pinned me down, sitting on me and putting his knees on my arms. I still attempted to struggle against him as he leaned over and lifted the lid of the toilet. I struggled harder and shouted as he dropped the bags in and flushed them away. Desperation leant me strength and I started to fight wildly. Mark half rose to get his weight off me and I went for him again, making him stumble backwards.

"Baby girl, stop!" I lunged towards the toilet, hoping beyond everything that he hadn't managed to get rid of them, but there was nothing there. He grabbed me round the waist and pulled me away from there, tight against him. "Baby girl, please!" I hit out at him again, trying to get away. He pinned my arms to my sides and hugged me tight against him. After a while the fight went out of me and tears began to run down my face.

"Please Mark, you're killing me. I need them."

"And you're killin' me, baby girl" he replied in a pained voice. "You don't need em, you never have and I'm gonna help you."

"I do, I can't cope without them," I sobbed.

"Come on baby girl, lets go."

"Where?"

"To… I'm…" He sighed, struggling to get the words out. "I'm goin' to get you some more," he whispered eventually.

The tears stopped almost as suddenly as they had begun. "Let's go then."

He grabbed a towel, putting it over his nose before helping me up from where I was still on my knees. I tugged him towards the door, willing him to hurry. He sighed and followed me down to where his truck was parked outside. He opened the door for me and then started to walk around to the driver's side. I gestured for him to get a move on. He sighed again as he opened his door, throwing the towel into the back seat. Getting in, he started the car. I never noticed him locking the doors. I didn't pay any attention to where we were actually going as I was too fixated on what he had told me we were going to do. As I found out later on, these were roads I had come to know well enough, but it really didn't click into place in my head until he turned in to a driveway and I took a look around me. My eyes opened wide as I recognised the entrance to Mark's ranch.

"What are we doing here?" I asked indignantly. He didn't reply, simply drove up to the house and switched the truck off. He unlocked the doors and got out, walking around the front of the truck to my door. If I had been a little more with it I might have made a break for it, but as it was I just sat there dumbly as he opened the door and dragged me out. My silence was broken however when he slung me over his shoulder and I started kicking and screaming. "You bastard! You lied to me!"

"Jade, keep it down," he said evenly. His words had no effect on me and I continued struggling and shouting. Suddenly another voice came from almost beside us.

"Daddy? What's going on?"

Mark's head snapped to the side and he quickly set me down on the ground. "Don't move," he snarled at me before walking over to the little girl and picking her up. "It's alright princess. Come on, let's get you back inside." I took my chance while he was busy and made a break for it back up the drive towards the road. I heard Mark tell Amber to go inside and then his footsteps were gaining on me with every stride. He caught me easily and dragged me to a halt. "I'm goin' to warn you once, Jade. Make a scene in front of my little girl and you'll see a side of me you don't want to see after." I stood there, breathing hard and head hanging. Mark turned his head and saw Amber still standing where he had left her. He shot a glare at me, warning me not to try anything stupid again, and jogged over to her, scooping her up in his arms. "I thought I told you to go inside."

"Daddy, that lady scared me. I couldn't move and then you got mad," the little girl said in a quiet voice. Somehow those few words from that little girl penetrated where nothing else had. For the first time I saw a flash of what I had become, and it scared the hell out of me. I lifted my head and stared at the two of them, wide eyed. Mark gave me the deadliest look I had ever seen before his features softened and he looked back at Amber.

"It's OK, sweetheart. We were just playin'. You know how me and you play monsters? We just got a little carried away. Now go inside and I'll be in soon." He set her back down and gave her a little push towards the house, watching until she went in the door. Once it was safely shut behind her, he turned back to me with that hard furious look on his face once more. I swallowed nervously as he quickly strode towards me, grabbing my wrist and roughly dragging me round towards the back of the house. We went down some steps and I stumbled, just barely managing to stay on my feet as he opened the basement door and shoved me inside. I tripped on the way through the door and landed in a heap on the floor.

"What the FUCK do you think you were doin' just now?" I couldn't get words out, just shook my head and scrambled backwards away from him over the floor. "Do you know what you just fuckin' did? HUH? DO YOU? I have NEVER hit a woman and I never will but I am fuckin' close to it now." I backed right into the wall and closed my eyes. "Get up," he growled. I just sat there against the wall and shook. "Get up," he said again, very slowly. I dragged myself up the wall, still unable to get up the courage to open my eyes. I heard a door open. "In." I opened my eyes and looked into an inner room. "IN!" I swallowed again and did as I was told. Mark stood in the doorway behind me. "Now, you sit there and don't make a sound. I'm goin' to send Amber off to her grandparents and I'm goin' to calm down a bit cos I don't trust myself right now." I nodded slightly in reply. He stepped back and slammed the door shut and there was a click as he locked it.

I sat in silence when he had gone, shaking a little from reaction to what had occurred. I had no idea how much time passed while he was gone, but it must have been somewhere near to a couple of hours. I was well into come down by that stage and it was far worse than normal as I had mixed what I was taking. After what felt like forever there was another click and the door swung open. By that stage I was curled into a tiny ball on the cot in the room, shivering fiercely. Mark walked in carrying a tray and set it down, coming over to me quickly and crouching down beside the cot.

"Baby girl?"

I looked up and spoke in a tiny weak voice. "Cold."

He shrugged off his over shirt and wrapped it around me. "You need anythin'?"

"Water," I croaked. He went to the tray and picked up the glass of water standing on it, passing it to me as he sat on the bed next to me. I sat up slightly and drank the whole thing down.

"I'm so sorry I've got to do this, baby girl," he whispered sadly

"You don't. Just let me out of here."

He leant his head back against the wall and let out a long breath. "No can do, darlin'."

"Please God, let me out!"

He closed his eyes and whispered once more. "I can't."

"You're going to kill me," I muttered.

His eyes snapped open. "What the hell gives you that idea?"

"If you make me stay here."

He wrapped an arm round me. "You're in here for your own good, baby girl. You're killin' yourself."

"I can't do it, Mark."

"You can, and I'm goin' to help you," he said quietly. I shook my head violently. "You have no choice," he continued. I curled up into a ball of misery again. I felt him move as he put his head in his hands.

"How can you put me through this? I thought you said you loved me?"

"Cos I can't bear to see you doin' that to yourself. I'm doin' it because I love you."

"You wouldn't make me do this if you did."

"Baby girl, I've seen you doin' this to yourself for a while now. Do you know how much that killed me? I had an idea but I didn't know for sure! Do you know what it's like watchin' the person you love destroy themselves like that?"

"I wasn't destroying anything," I retorted.

He shook his head. "You need help, baby girl." He got to his feet and stood looking down at me. "And I'm goin' to be the one to help you." He stopped at the door, hand on the door handle. "I just thought you should know. I can't do this on my own. Someone will be here soon."

I raised my head a little. "Who?"

Mark sighed and opened the door. "You'll find out in about an hour." He walked out, closing and locking the door behind himself.


	28. Chapter 28

I had no idea how long it was that I was left there on my own that time. It felt like an eternity as I gradually felt worse and worse. By the time there was a knock on the door, I was curled into a tiny ball of misery and could only summon a pathetic little whimper in reply.

"Jade? Is it OK if I come in?" Dave's voice came through the door and a couple of seconds later it opened. I looked up from the bed to see him almost stumble in shock at the state of me. "Oh honey." He shut the door and put down the water jugs he was carrying. "Jade…"

I caught sight of the jugs. "Water." Dave looked around and saw the empty glass, filling it and handing it to me once I had sat up.

"I would have brought bottles but Mark said you could refill the jugs in the sink in the bathroom." I nodded slightly and drained the glass. He held out the jug and I took it, drinking my fill as he settled down on the floor opposite me. I put the jug down carefully and looked up at him.

"Get me out of here."

"Jade…"

"Fucking get me out of here!"

He sighed and leant against the door. "No."

"Dave," I growled.

"No, Jade."

"What's the matter? Want another fuck?" In the state I was in, anything I could use to try and get out of there was fair game, never mind the consequences. He stiffened and growled low in his throat. "Get me out of here and it's yours," I continued.

He pushed himself quickly to his feet. "No, Jade."

"Come on, get me out of here and it's any way you want it." A low growl rumbled round the room again. Some part of my mind realised that the sound had come not from Dave, but from outside the door.

Dave glanced behind himself at the door briefly. "Will you fucking listen to yourself, Jade?"

"It was good enough for you once before," I shot out.

There was no mistaking where the noise came from that time. "You fucking what?" Mark shouted from outside. Dave glared and turned towards the door.

"Mark, I…"

"Now is not the time. I'll get to you in time."

"Dave, come on," I said, trying to get him to help me. He turned back to me again.

"Why? Give me one good reason. You fucking lied to me, Jade." He spoke quietly, pained at the thought.

"You said you'd be here for me whatever." He held his arms out slightly, as if showing me that he was there. "Then get me the fuck out of here."

"Getting you out of here wouldn't be helping you."

I sneered and turned away. "No wonder you're fucking divorced." Out of the corner of my eye I saw his head snap up and towards me.

"This isn't you, Jade."

I looked down at myself. "Looks like me."

"Looks can be deceiving." He shook his head and turned towards the door, hurt radiating from every line on his body.

"Go on, Dave. Run away and disappoint another woman. It wasn't that good a fuck anyway." The tiny sane part of my brain that wasn't purely concerned with getting away and getting more drugs winced in horror at what I was saying. I had become a completely different person and had only one priority and that wasn't the people I cared about.

Dave turned back to me with a sad laugh. "I'm not the one disappointing people, Jade. Do you realise that there is one of the strongest men I know stood outside this room a broken mess? Do you know who broke him, Jade? You did. You are fucking pathetic! You claim to love him." He gave a harsh little laugh. "I don't think you love anyone but yourself."

My eyes opened wide in shock. He had never spoken to me anywhere near this way. "What…" I started.

"For once shut up!" he shouted. I cringed away slightly as he continued. "Jade, I love you but right now I can't fucking stand you! I'm ashamed to call you my friend. Look at yourself. When the going gets tough, you run off. First drink and now drugs. Are you retarded? You are nothing but a selfish little bitch! Do you know what you are doing to Mark? Do you?" I shook my head very slightly, still wide eyed. Dave suddenly opened the door, slamming it against the wall and grabbed Mark, pulling him inside. He grabbed my head and forced me to look up at Mark. "Look, Jade. Look at him! Look into his eyes. See what you've done?" I stared up at Mark, biting my lip. "Does it feel good, knowing you've done this to him? Knowing that he spends his time cleaning up your messes, that he's left his daughter at his mother's to help you when he's only just got her back?"

Mark stared down at me. "Dave, don't…"

"No! This is what she needs. She needs to see what she's doing to us." He growled and turned my head to face him. "Look at me, Jade." I shook my head and closed my eyes. "Look at me!" he shouted. "You can't hide any more." I jumped and my eyes flew open. "Look me in the eyes and tell me if I like telling you this," he said, much quieter.

"No," I whispered.

"God damn it, Jade, I am scared out of my mind right now! I don't know what this could have done to your body. Do you like making people feel like this? Because you seem to." I started to cry and he pushed me away, making a noise. "I never thought I would be disgusted or disappointed in you." He turned and stalked out, leaving Mark standing silently in front of me.

Feeling in desperate need suddenly of some comfort, I stumbled over to Mark and wrapped my arms around him. He didn't move away, but he didn't return the hug either.

"How could you?" he asked quietly.

I stiffened. "What?" I should have known what he was talking about but there were a number of things it could have been.

He looked down at me, a strange light in his eyes. "You cheated on me." I closed my eyes and just nodded, knowing there was no use trying to duck the issue. "Were you on drugs then too?" There was a hint of hope in his voice, trying to find an excuse for what had happened.

My normal innate honesty wouldn't allow me to give him that comfort. "No," I whispered, opening my eyes.

"When?" he whispered in return.

"The night we had that fight in the bar."

"The first day?" he asked in a strained voice. I nodded again, unable to summon words to answer him. He breathed hard for a moment. "I didn't think I was right."

"It was after the fight," I said quietly.

"And that makes it better?"

I shook my head once more. "Nothing can make it better."

"Am I really not good enough for you?" I looked up into his face and saw a range of emotions there. There was a hint of anger, but the overriding feel was of upset and paranoia and I could tell he was remembering the harsh words we had exchanged in the mock fights.

"Of course you are!" I said quickly, feeling an almost physical pain at seeing the hurt on his face.

"Then why?" he whispered.

"Anger mostly, I suppose. There was no real reason. At least, not one that makes sense now."

"You always said you were worried I would cheat on you. Turns out I should have been worried about you." He removed my arms and stepped away.

"It was the stupidest thing I have ever done but I can't take it back, any more than I can take the drinking back, or this."

Mark shook his head. "You want to know the saddest part of this?" He looked down at the ground. "I'm stupid enough to forgive you just because I love you that damn much."

I broke completely at that point, and began sobbing. "I'm so sorry," I managed to get out between sobs.

Mark walked over to the wall and rested his forehead against it, fist curled into a ball over his head. "Sorry doesn't change the past."

"Don't you think I would if I could?"

He didn't look at me. "Do you really want me to answer that?"

"You know I would," I protested.

"No, I don't" he replied flatly.

"You think I planned on doing it? On screwing up not only what I had with you but chancing losing one of my best friends?"

"You did something as stupid as drinking yourself into oblivion and taking drugs." He still refused to look at me.

"I guess I am just stupid." From somewhere rational thought and behaviour had come to claim me once more. I wasn't sure I was enjoying that fact.

He finally looked over at me, although completely ignored what I was saying. "You're shivering. Are you cold?" I nodded in reply. He stripped the blanket from the small bed and walked over to wrap it around me. "That going to be enough?" I shook my head. "I'll go and get you some more."

"That's not what… OK." I trailed off, knowing that he wouldn't be keen on the idea.

He stopped and looked at me. "What were you going to say?"

"That's not what I meant," I muttered.

He frowned. "I'm not going to get you any more drugs."

I frowned a little at that, but carried on saying what I had been going to. "Not that either."

He sighed. "Then what, ba… Jade?"

"I need you to hold me," I whispered. He looked at me for a long time and then slowly walked over. I looked up hopefully, a feeling of relief washing over me when he very slowly wrapped his arms around me. I leant in against him and whispered, "That's better." His body was a little tense, but he rubbed my back gently. I buried my face in his chest. "I'm an idiot." He didn't reply. "I don't deserve either of you." He tensed up fully. It was like having your arms wrapped round a section of brick wall.

"Either of us?"

"You with me or Dave as a friend." Mark didn't relax or speak and I stiffened suddenly. "If I still have either of those things."

"You still have me," he said quietly. I relaxed just a little at those words, although I was really far from convinced. "I'm goin' to go and get you some more blankets." He pulled back a little and looked down at me. "You want anythin' else?"

I pulled a slight face. "I should talk to Dave if he will."

Mark pulled away fully. "I'll send him down with the stuff." He turned away and headed for the door.

"Mark!" I called urgently. He stopped but neither turned nor spoke. "Come back with him."

"Do you really think that's such a good idea?"

"Don't blame him." Mark stood motionless and silent. "It was me that was wrong, not him." He still didn't say a word. "Talk to me, shout at me, do something!"

"I'll send Dave down and then come back with the stuff." He walked out.

It didn't take long for Dave to come back. I looked up from where I was sat on the floor, leaning against the wall.

"Hey," I said softly.

"Mark said you wanted to talk," he said, looking at me. I let out a long breath and nodded. "Well?" he asked after a few seconds.

"Sounds so fucking pathetic but I'm sorry."

"You're right, it does sound pathetic."

"I shouldn't have said those things, I shouldn't have lied to you and I shouldn't have put you in the position I did," I said, staring at the floor.

"No, you shouldn't," he replied flatly.

"I can't take them back and I can't make up for it. Sorry is all I got." He nodded once, sharply, showing that he accepted what I had said. "I've fucked up, more than once, and shit on the people that were there for me."

Dave rolled his shoulders, looking away from me slightly. "Yeah, you did." The door opened and Mark came in, carrying a bundle of blankets and sweatshirts.

I glanced over at him. "I've done my best to lose the two most important people in my life here," I said quietly. Mark put the blankets down and held out a huge shirt to me, not looking at either of us. "Thanks," I muttered, taking it and just staring at it in my hands for a few moments.

Mark turned and looked at me finally. "That OK?" I cuffed away a couple of tears and nodded. "You want them all? I don't have any of your stuff here so they're a little big."

"Just leave them for a minute, please?" He nodded and sat on the bed, leaning on his knees and staring at the floor. I looked around the room trying to work out where to start on what I wanted to say. Dave still leant against the wall and watched me steadily. I moved my gaze to the floor as I started to speak. "Everything that has happened is my fault. I haven't been fair to either of you." Dave nodded agreement. I turned to him and spoke directly to him. "I shouldn't have put you in that position. I went too far."

"I'm not a child, Jade. I make my own decisions," he replied.

I nodded. "I know, and maybe that's what I forgot in the first place. I was playing with fire."

"We both knew exactly what we were doing," he said flatly. I saw Mark clench his fists out of the corner of my eye. I threw a glance towards him before I continued.

"I shouldn't have been there, and I had plenty of chances to say no." It needed to be said, but my courage nearly left me when I saw Mark's fists clench tighter and his eyes drop closed.

"Me too," Dave sighed.

In what was the first unselfish act I had done for a long time, I tried to take all the blame for what had happened. "I was hurt and angry and lashed out in the first way that offered itself."

I could almost see Dave's hackles raise. "So it didn't mean a thing?"

I threw a glance towards Mark. "I didn't say that, Dave. You gave me what I needed right then."

"So you used me?" Dave spat out.

"No! Yes… no, it wasn't like that."

"What was it like?" Mark asked quietly.

"It just happened, Mark. And it was just that one night."

Dave frowned, and I could see clearly on his face that I was making him feel very used. He pushed himself away from the wall. "If you can look me in the eye and honestly tell me it didn't mean a thing I'll never speak about it again."

I swallowed nervously and looked at Mark again. No matter what I said, I was digging myself in deeper with one of them. I went for honesty. "I can't and you know it."

"No, I don't, Jade. You just made me feel like I wasn't worth a damn thing!" Mark raised his head to watch us.

I shook my head. "I don't have the words to tell you what it meant." I saw Mark close his eyes. "But it wasn't the same." Dave nodded and subsided against the wall. Mark dropped his head, eyes still closed. "It could never be the same," I said softly. I caught Mark's movement in my peripheral vision as he unclenched his fists and ran his hands through his hair. I took a step towards Dave and stopped as he nodded towards Mark and mouthed 'You broke him, you fix him.'

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Opening my eyes again I turned and took a few steps towards Mark. "I don't know what I can say to you. There is nothing I can say that will make any of it better." I saw him tense and realised that he didn't know I was talking to him. Once I had started talking though, I couldn't alter the flow of my words. "I always seem to be saying it but I wish things had been different." Mark squeezed his eyes further closed. "If I could go back and change things I would but that's not possible. We're here now and none of it can change. All I can say is I'm sorry, sorry for the drinking, sorry for what I'm doing to you now." He dropped his head and put it in his hands. I was startled to see that they were shaking slightly. "I'm sorry I scared your daughter and made you send her away." At last he lifted his head slightly. "I'm sorry for making you do all this. Most of all I'm sorry I hurt you, the one thing I always promised I would never do." He dropped his hands but still didn't look at me. I took another deep breath. "I can understand if you can't forgive me, if you don't want anything else to do with me. If that's how it is I'll go and you'll never have to lay eyes on me again."

He spoke finally in a very quiet voice, almost a whisper. "I love you too much to not forgive you." I heard a movement behind me as Dave slipped quietly out of the room, feeling as if he had been eavesdropping.

"I should have trusted you, not reacted to what you said but I never had much common sense."

"Dar… I can see you still shiverin', Jade. Wrap yourself up some more." I reached over and grabbed a sweatshirt, pulling it on quickly. Mark sat there and looked up at me. "I didn't mean like that." I cocked my head to the side as I gave him a puzzled look. He opened his arms a little. "I meant using these." I moved quickly to him, but came over a little cautious when I reached him, sitting beside him. He pulled me into his lap so I was sitting sideways and, with a shaky little sigh, I buried my face in his neck. He slowly wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my head.

Love is a strange thing. Rationality has nothing at all to do with it. If I had ever been asked how Mark would have reacted to me cheating on him, I would have said that I wouldn't have seen him for dust. The idea of forgiveness would never even have occurred to me to come from him. He had told me several times before that he loved me. It wasn't until we went through that day and the ones that followed it that I had any concept of just what he truly did feel for me. Would things have gone differently if I had known before what I came to learn then? A foolish question, but one that would still leap out to bother me in future days. The sad thing was, knowing myself as I did, I doubted it would have made any difference at all.

"I really am sorry about Amber." He made a dismissive noise, trying to stop me worrying about it. "How can I not be worried about it? I scared her."

"She'll be fine, I convinced her we were playin'." He gave me a little squeeze. "Amber wasn't the only one scared today, Jade." I glanced up at him sharply. "You don't remember me telling you?"

I shook my head. "I remember you being there, and fighting but not that. You were dancing with me and then…" I trailed off, frowning. "And you threw it all away! Jesus Mark, you threw the whole damn lot down the toilet"

"And I'd do it again in an instant coz begging obviously doesn't work." I glanced sharply up at him again. "Never mind," he mumbled as he realised I didn't remember that part.

"What do you mean begging? Tell me."

"No," he said, turning his head to look to the side.

"I don't like knowing there's stuff I don't remember."

He went quiet, staring at the wall for long seconds before speaking quietly. "I got down on my knees and begged you, Jade. Happy now? Not that it did a damn bit of good. You pretty much gave me a fuck off look and told me no."

I shook my head once more, unable to picture the scene he was describing to me. "How long do I have to be in here for?" I asked, desperate to change the subject.

"However long it takes."

"I have no idea how long that is. I never saw this part of it." Mark just shrugged. "I know someone that does though. Same place I got the stuff from."

"Who?" he asked softly.

"Damian," I sighed. I felt him stiffen. "I called him and got him to send some stuff to me."

"I see," he said, his grip loosening as he leaned away from me. I gave him a questioning look, unable to understand what was causing him to move away from me like that. "Did you sleep with him too?" he whispered.

I closed my eyes in despair of him even thinking that. "I never even saw him. Just called him in Florida." He looked away from me. "You don't believe me," I said in a flat monotone.

"I don't know what to believe."

"I only cheated that one night. That's all there was."

"It was enough," he said harshly.

"I know, believe me I know. I knew the next morning."

"You only slept with him once right?" He finally looked at me.

"One night only," I muttered.

"That's not what I meant, Jade." I looked away. Mark tensed more. "I see."

"Twice," I whispered.

Mark swallowed and gently set me down on the bed before standing up. "Tell me what to do, Jade."

"Don't go, please don't go," I said urgently.

"I've already told you I'm not goin' to leave you."

"I think a part of you already has." I looked up at him.

"No, Jade." He turned round. "You've got all of me, you always have done."

I frowned in confusion. "Then what do you want me to tell you?"

"I don't know what to fucking DO!" He leant against the wall and slowly slid down it to the floor. "You never told me why?" I glanced at him, not understanding. "Why you took the drugs."

"I made a promise," I said simply.

"And you think drugs are better than drink?" he asked incredulously.

"I never said it made sense, although it felt like it at the time." I sighed heavily. "It all made sense at the time." It was painful to see the look on his face directed at me then, sad and tired as it had been the first time I had spoken to him. And this time I had caused it. "I don't know what you want me to say."

"Tell me you love me?" he said in a low voice.

I regarded him steadily for long seconds. "I do love you."

He searched my eyes for the truth in what I said and then gave me the closest thing to a smile he had given all day. "I love you too."

My head dropped back against the wall as an indescribable relief washed over me. I lifted my head back up to see a concerned expression on his face. "That's a good thing to hear. I want to know how long this shit is going to last. I want to know how long I'm going to feel like this."

"I wouldn't know, Jade."

"Give me my phone and I can find out." He frowned at me. "Mark, I want to know. He'll only talk to me."

"You ain't talking to him right now. I'm not taking any chances. You think I ain't heard you talking in code to someone on the phone?" he asked quietly. "If anyone's going to talk to him, it'll be me."

"He won't talk to you. Tony might but not him."

"I'll ask Tony then." He got to his feet. "I'll be right back." I started swearing at the top of my voice and throwing things around the room, furious at having been discovered and at not getting what I wanted right then – more drugs. Mark frowned and shook his head. "I knew it. I'll be back." He walked out of the door. As soon as it was shut I started throwing things at it, screaming incoherently. It wasn't long before he was back outside, asking me if I was going to let him make this call if he came back inside.

"He's gonna kill me," I muttered frantically.

Mark was already holding the phone to his ear when he came in. I didn't pay much attention to the conversation he had with Tony. I was far too concerned with trying to get the phone away from him full stop. I had an impression of threats being muttered towards Damian, and Mark telling Tony exactly what I had done. It sounded after a while as if he was actually talking to Damian. His expression became stonier by the second and he finally growled something about 'yes it was' and threw the phone on the bed, stalking out and slamming the door behind him. I pounced on the phone and picked it up.

"Damian? What the fuck did you say to him?"

"Guess you got caught in more ways than one, lover! I always said you'd do it to him, fuck him over, just like you did me."

"You fucking asshole, Damian! I've only just got him talking to me!"

"Come on, we both know you are going to be begging me for more before this phone goes down." The certainty in his voice grated on my every nerve ending, inflating my already fragile temper beyond what little control I had at the time.

"Yeah? Cos it's going down now!" I threw the phone as hard as I could at the wall, watching in satisfaction as it smashed into pieces.

A few short minutes later, the door flew open again and Dave stumbled into the room. "What the fuck did you say to him? Do you have to keep fucking rubbing it in his face?"

"I didn't fucking say anything!" I growled.

"Then do you want to tell me why he fucking came upstairs and just punched me? Oh shit, there he is again!" Mark came flying through the door and started laying into Dave again. I watched the carnage unfolding in front of me for a few moments before noticing that the door had been left wide open. Glancing at the two fighting men again I saw that they were fully occupied between themselves, and edged round them towards the door. I heard Dave's voice when I was still only a few paces outside. "Stop! Fucking stop, will you? Where's Jade?" I dropped my head and ran full pelt away. I heard heavy footsteps come out of the basement as they began to look for me, and Dave's voice floated to my ears once more. "I can't fucking see her."

I heard Mark calling my name but my steps never even faltered. They did speed up when I heard him call. "Over there!" I glanced back over my shoulder and saw them both behind me, and upped my speed. I had done a lot of running to keep fit but had allowed it to drop off over the previous few weeks, as drugs had been easier to get than a natural endorphin high from exercise. With both of them running full pelt after me however, I managed to find another gear from somewhere. That didn't help me when Dave finally caught up with me and basically speared me to the ground. All the wind was knocked out of my body as I landed in a heap and he landed on top of me with a thud. From somewhere I found the energy to try and fight him off.

"What the…" Dave exclaimed, trying to grab my arms. I was furiously trying to punch him until Mark caught hold of my arms and knelt on my shoulders. Dave grabbed my legs and sat on them, effectively pinning me to the ground. "About time you caught up old man," he snarled. I occupied myself trying to reach something to bite. Mark stood up, lifting me by my arms.

"You want to watch your fucking mouth or I'll do more than punch you." I started to fight and kick as my arms were being firmly held. Dave grabbed my ankles and yanked me up into the sir.

"Try and keep up now," he sniped at Mark. I started kicking my legs hard, trying to break his slightly suspect grip on my ankles. He shifted his grip so he had me by the knees. "Pack it in." I wriggled against the stronger hold. "I will drop you on your ass if you don't keep still."

I looked down my body at him. "Come on, Dave. You can find something better to do down there." Mark squeezed my wrists in warning.

"That's enough, Jade," Dave retorted. "Don't you think you've said enough for one night?"

"I didn't mean any of it."

"Yeah well, it got me in enough fucking trouble!"

"It could be good," I said in a low voice.

"I doubt it," he grunted.

"It was before." Mark squeezed my wrists again and gave a low warning growl. "Come on, Dave. What do you say?"

"No," he replied flatly.

"Fuck you!" I burst out and tried to kick him.

"You know what? I've had enough," Mark said, dropping me on my head and stalking off towards the house. Dave was left there holding me by the legs. Sensing a possibility of escape I started fighting and trying to get away.

"No you don't," Dave muttered, dragging me along the ground.

"Shit! That hurts, motherfucker!" I shouted.

"You should have thought of that before your mouth got you into trouble."

"Asshole," I spat.

"Got it in one, babe." It was a flat statement, no affection in the friendly sounding word.

I shifted tactics. "Please help me," I said quietly.

"I am helping you."

"No you're not." He dragged me down the steps, not caring that my body hit every single step on the way down. "Fuck!" I growled angrily. Dave grabbed me under the arm and dragged me to my feet.

"I'm through being nice, cos you obviously aren't going to return the favour."

"Nice my ass," I shot back.

He let out a harsh breath and shook his head before throwing me back into the room. I landed in a heap, cursing loudly. 


	29. Chapter 29

I didn't remember a great deal about those next few days after it was all over. I quickly lost track of time shut in that room. Looking back on it all afterwards I realised that it had been a mental addiction, not a physical one. My brain told me I needed the drugs to get through life and, to start with, I believed it fully. 

There were only a few things that I recalled after the fact. Some kind of uneasy truce had obviously been struck up between Mark and Dave while I was in that basement, as I would see either one of them when they brought me food. Not that I eat much of it. Mostly it would get thrown as I went on a rampage, alternating that with crying and begging for them to let me out or get me drugs.

One afternoon felt very different when I woke up from a nap. I felt absolutely exhausted but my mind was my own. I looked at the bruises covering me from where I had thrown myself at the door or around the room in fits of temper, and surveyed the mess I had made of the room. I was slightly horrified at what I had clearly done, and jumped when the lock clicked on the door. It half opened and I caught a glimpse of Dave as he shoved a try through the gap.

"Wait…" I called, sitting up on the bed. The door stopped just short of closing properly.

"What?" he asked warily.

"Talk to me? Please?"

"Why? All you do is give me abuse."

"Not today," I sighed. "What day is it?"

"Tuesday," he replied flatly.

"How long have I been in here?" I realised ruefully that it was pointless knowing what day it was when I didn't have a clue what day it had been when I had gone into that room.

"Nearly four days. Is that all you wanted?"

"Dave, please, for the first time I feel like my head is nearly straight," I said softly.

"Do you really think I'm going to fall for that?" For the first time I started to get an idea of how far I would have to go to try and get back from this.

"I gave you that much shit?" I asked quietly.

"Yep," he answered sharply. "And what you've done to me is not even half as bad as what you've done to Mark. So forgive me if I'm in an I don't give a shit mood right now, alright?"

"I guess I'm not surprised." I shook my head, unable to comprehend what I must have done for Dave to be like this with me.

"Now is there anything else you want?"

I shrugged a little. "Shower and a proper bed would be good. Maybe a book, cos I'm bored shitless in here."

"Not my call."

"I can't talk to him if he's not here, Dave."

"I'll see if he wants to come down." He slammed the door shut and left me sitting silently, hoping that Mark would come. I was lucky – it wasn't long before Mark's voice came gruffly through the door.

"What do you want?"

"To talk to you."

"I think you've ripped me apart enough for one day." I winced at the sound of his voice.

"I think I'm done with that."

He opened the door and walked in, looking exhausted, and sighed deeply. "Well, here I am."

"You look tired," I said softly.

"Like you look any better," he snorted.

"If I look like I feel, it ain't pretty." I shrugged slightly, not really concerned with how I looked. Mark leant against the wall and watched me warily.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"How much longer?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, not much." I nodded with a slight smile of relief. "Is it OK to go now, or do you need something else?"

"I don't need anything, but there's some stuff I would like."

"Give me the list and I'll see what I can do."

"Some fresh air and a shower?"

He shook his head. "Nope. They both mean leaving the room. You'll have to make do with the bathroom here for now."

"A book then? I'm bored."

He eyed me suspiciously. "You goin' to throw it at my head?"

I tried a weak smile. "Thought I might actually try reading it."

"Dave's?" he continued. "Try and cut us our yourself with the paper?"

"No, I just want something to do."

"Fine, that I can do. That it?"

"One more thing I'd kill for." He gave me a questioning look. "Coffee. I'm starting to dream about bloody coffee," I said in a soft voice.

"Goin' to throw it over me or try to hit me with the mug?" I shook my head quickly, alarmed by the fact that I had apparently tried to do stuff like that. He pushed himself off the wall. "I'll be right back." He came back ten minutes later, putting a steaming mug in the middle of the floor and tossing a book onto the bed before retreating back to the wall. "That OK?"

I sighed and headed for the mug. "As good as I'm going to get."

"Any more to add to the list?"

I wrapped my hands around the mug and just breathed the wonderful smell of coffee for a few seconds. "Not if I'm keeping you from something."

"I was just watching Sports Centre. I've got a bit of time."

I took a mouthful of the coffee and sighed contentedly. "Ah, that's good." Mark leant back against the wall, working his neck from side to side. I looked over at him for a second. "Hey, thank you," I said in a low voice.

He looked up with a raised eyebrow. "You're welcome."

"I mean it. That stuff grabs hold of you quickly." I moved my gaze to the floor although I heard the affirmative noise he made. "I've been a total bitch, huh?"

"I'd say you were going easy on yourself."

"I guess so," I muttered, staring into the depths of the mug.

"So, the list?" he prompted. I shook my head a little. "If you want any chance of getting out of here today or tomorrow, give me your list."

"It's nothing," I said finally. "You've already done it, or as much as I can expect."

"So, there's nothin' else?" I shook my head sadly, unable to think at that moment of any reason to keep him there.

"Right." He pushed himself up off the wall. "Anythin' else you need to talk about?"

"I guess I've said sorry a few times? No point in saying it again."

"I've lost count," he shrugged. "So, probably not."

"I'll just stick with thanks the. For all of it." He nodded and turned to leave. "Mark?" I called urgently.

He stopped and half turned towards me. "Yeah?"

"I am sorry, for everything."

He sighed. "I know, I know." He turned to leave again.

"I love you," I muttered.

He looked at me over his shoulder. "You too."

"How's Amber?" I asked suddenly.

"Fine. Still at my mom's. She's havin' fun."

"Unlike you," I observed. He sighed. "Yeah, I know, I know." He moved to the side and returned to leaning against the wall. "I've still got the shakes a bit," I observed, desperate to keep him there as he showed an inclination to stay.

"Hold your hand up." I held up a hand, watching the slight tremors in it. Mark watched it carefully for a few seconds. "Not as bad as they were."

"I don't spill stuff any more. I'm itching to get out of here though."

"Soon, Jade," he sighed.

"Dave said it's been 4 days near enough?" He nodded. "I completely lost track of the days." I drained the coffee and put the mug back on the floor. "There you go, no violence."

I heard him mutter quietly "Yet." He cleared his throat. "Want another?"

"That'd be great," I smiled.

"Want anything else?" he asked, bending down to pick up the mug.

"I am hungry," I mused.

"You know you didn't touch the food Dave brought down." He pointed at the tray that Dave had pushed through the door earlier and I could have sworn that his lips twitched.

I shook my head, smiling ruefully at myself. "I didn't even look at it. Silly cow," I snorted.

"I'll go get your coffee and something to eat." He returned quickly carrying two mugs of coffee and a box of cookies. I put the book down as he came in and watched him toss the box onto the bed and set one of the mugs down on the floor before returning to his place by the wall once more. I retrieved the mug and tore into the box of cookies.

"Ah, sugar!" I exclaimed happily, biting into one. I saw Mark shake his head as he sipped his coffee. "You have no idea how much better food tastes right now. Not fun eating with a mouth that dry."

"I don't imagine it is," he replied. "It's good though, you weren't eatin' much." He slid down the wall and settled on the floor, concentrating on his coffee.

"Could you open the door a crack?" I asked hesitantly. Mark shook his head quickly. "I only want some air in here." He sighed and got up, opening the door just a crack before settling on the floor right next to it. I shifted along the bed until I could feel the air coming in and sighed contentedly. "That's better." I dropped my head back against the wall as I started to think for the first time about what I was going to do when I got out of there.

"What you thinkin' about?" he asked curiously.

"Everything," I sighed.

"Care to share?"

"Where do I go from here? For a start, what did you tell work?" I was conscious of the fact that I had been given that stern warning after the fight in the club, and was worried that I might lose my job if they found out what I had been doing. I was totally reliant on Mark and Dave to keep quiet about it.

"I told them you had a family emergency," he said, staring at the opposite wall.

I sagged slightly in relief. "Thanks."

"No problem," he shrugged.

"Well, that's one less thing to worry about. What happens when I get out of here?"

He shrugged once more. "You can either go back to your place, go back to work or stay here for a while. It's up to you."

"You can't want me here though, not after what I've done," I said, feeling slightly nonplussed.

"I wouldn't have said it if I didn't want you here."

"What about Amber, though?" I asked uncertainly. I couldn't see him letting me anywhere near his daughter, but if he meant what he said then that was obviously not the case.

"She's got to meet you some time." I closed my eyes as the ramifications of what he said ran through my mind. If he was talking about me meeting his daughter then he plainly thought we were going to get through this. I wasn't sure I saw how it was going to happen, but damn sure I would do my best to if he gave me the opportunity.

I gave a slightly ironic laugh. "Sometime that's better than last time." He nodded, unsmiling. "Things are never going to be the same," I sighed.

"They will eventually," he said after a pause. I made a dismissive noise. "Am I ever wrong?" he asked, an ironic twist to his mouth.

"No, I guess not." I thought of one thing he had been wrong about, but had no wish to bring up the fact of my cheating on him again when we had just started talking normally. His face showed he knew exactly what I was thinking about.

"Just remember, not everybody is as perfect as me," he said with a very small, almost not there smile.

I gave a little laugh. "There you go with the ego trip. I suppose I should go back to work."

"If you want to go back to work that's up to you, but you're welcome here," he said quietly.

"I don't know that I want to, but I guess I should get back in the saddle again." I managed not to wince at the unintentional double meaning that could have been taken from what I had said.

Mark worked his neck. "You know I'm not goin' to be there for long, right?"

"It's coming up soon?" I knew he was going to retire, but this was the first time it had been spoken of as a solid fact.

He nodded. "Mania. That's my stage, it seemed appropriate."

"Finally going to lose that perfect winning streak?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. The final details haven't been sorted yet, but it's likely."

"Makes sense, I suppose," I said slowly. "It'll be strange after."

"It's not like I'm going to be gone forever. I'll still be around every now and then. And you'll get back here from time to time. We'll sort something out." I nodded and watched as he dropped his head to look at the floor, twisting his back to get comfy.

"You know that's not going to do your hips much good," I observed. He looked up, puzzled at the random change of subject. "You're sitting in a damn draught," I explained.

"I'll survive."

"Just looks uncomfortable," I shrugged.

He frowned. "You hinting you want me next to you?"

"Always," I replied softly. He looked uncertain but slowly pulled himself to his feet and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Look," I said, a joking tone in my voice. "I'll even put the mug down." I leant down and placed it on the floor. Mark turned his head to look at me and gave me a real smartass look. I couldn't help bursting out laughing, almost unable to sit up straight.

"Somethin' funny?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Just that look," I giggled. He shook his head and looked down at the floor. I finally managed to regain control of myself. "God, it feels good to laugh."

"It's good to hear you laugh a laugh that ain't mockin'."

"I think it's close to over," I commented. I'm not thinking about it all the time."

"You still feel like you need it?" he asked seriously.

I gave a grim little laugh. "No, I don't need it. It was just…" He raised his head to look at me. "Once I'd started I couldn't go back. I felt so good and then the come down hit and there was nothing else that could make me feel better."

"That's why we'd see you lookin' like shit every now and then." I nodded my agreement. "I still don't understand why you did 'em in the first place, Jade," he sighed.

I took a deep breath and looked down at the floor. "I'm weak. I always thought I was strong but I'm weak. It was all too much. I couldn't think of any other way to cope with all of the shit that was going on."

"You know I didn't mean any of what I said, right?" I nodded slowly. I knew it now well enough. Mark put his head down, staring at the floor again. "I can't help but feel like I pushed you to them."

I shook my head quickly. "I knew what was going to happen. I just got caught up in it all when it happened. None of it is your fault."

"The split, the fights, it was all my idea, Jade." He sighed, putting his head in his hands. "I shouldn't have even suggested it."

"I agreed to it all. Well, apart from the thing with Annie. That was the worst part. That was when I really started to doubt. Although they managed to fix her nose."

"I'm sorry," he said, so quietly I almost didn't hear it.

"It's gone now. It's all gone and we can't change any of it." He nodded slightly. I snorted. "You know, we suck at working towards a happy ending."

He lifted his head and his eyes met mine. "It'll happen. We're almost there."

I glanced around the room and smiled sadly. "I'll have to take your word for that."

Mark gave a heavy sigh. "I've hated leaving you here."

"No other choice," I admitted. "I've hated being here though."

"Well, it looks like you'll be out of here today." I perked up and looked at him incredulously. "I just…" He paused for a second. "I just need to be sure." He looked away from me. "You've pulled me into this sense of security before, Jade. I need to be sure it's real this time."

"I don't know what I can do…"

"Neither do I. I guess I'll know when it happens." He stretched and then sat right back onto the bed, leaning his back against the wall. I shifted round on the bed to face him and wrapped my arms round my knees, watching him. He moved his hand as if about to touch me but stopped suddenly. "See somethin' you like?"

"Always," I said gently. He gave a half smile and leant his head back against the wall. I put my hand out towards him very slowly, unsure how he would react. I gently rested my hand on his arm, feeling him tense for a second and then relax. With a tremendous feeling of relief I tipped forward and leant my head against his arm.

Mark looked down, with a small smile. "Wantin' somethin'?" I tugged on his arm, trying to make him understand. "What was that?"

"Please?" I muttered.

"Please what?"

"I just want…" I glanced up to see him raise an eyebrow. "I just want a hug, that's all."

"All you had to do was ask." He lifted his arm for me. I tucked myself into his side and gave a wobbly sigh. He settled his arm down and brought the other one round to rest on my side. "That feels so good," I breathed.

"Yeah, it does," he replied softly.

"I'm so tired, Mark."

"You want some sleep?"

I snuggled in a little more. "Don't want to move." Mark chuckled and gave me a little squeeze. I closed my eyes and gave a huge yawn.

"Get some sleep, Jade." I mumbled something in reply and felt him ease me down gently on to the bed. "I'll be right back." I curled up into the space where he had been sitting and didn't reply. I vaguely heard him leave and return a few minutes later, crouching down by the bed.

"Jade? Wake up for a second." I opened my eyes blearily and blinked at him. He rested his arm on the bed and opened his hand to reveal some pills sitting in his palm. I stared at them, puzzled.

"What…"

"Dave found them when he went to clean up your apartment."

"There were some left?" I asked, confused. He nodded and took hold of my hand, tipping the pills from his palm into mine. I glared up at him. "Are you mad?" I tipped my hand, letting the pills fall onto the bed. Mark smiled and shook his head. "Throw them away, then." He picked them up and bent forward, dropping a kiss on my forehead.

"Good girl." He walked over to the sink and dropped them down the drain. Turning back to me, he held out his hand. "Come on."

"What? Where?" I asked, still confused. He didn't answer, just gave the outstretched hand a little shake. I got slowly to my feet and took it, surprised when he pulled me to the door and walked outside, still tugging me behind him. I stopped for a moment just outside the door. Mark looked back and frowned at me. "Just enjoying the sunshine," I explained.

"Want to enjoy the kitchen?" he asked, a slight smile on his face.

"Sounds good," I replied, an answering smile on my own face. His smile grew wider and he pulled my through the door into the kitchen.

"Dave?" he called.

Dave walked into the kitchen. "What… Jade!"

I stopped uncertainly. "Hey, Dave."

Mark cleared his throat. "I'll go run you a shower and get you some clothes." He walked out, leaving Dave and me alone.

"You're out then," Dave observed, looking at me. I looked at the floor and nodded. Dave headed to the coffee pot and poured two mugs, holding one out to me. I looked up at him before taking it.

"Thanks," I said gently.

"No problem." He picked up his own coffee and headed for the door. "I'm sure you know where everything else is." I called out to stop him and he turned, eyebrows raised in question. "Yeah?"

"It's just I'm grateful for everything you've done. I can never make it up."

He shrugged. "What are friends for?"

"Not to treat like I was treating you," I sighed. "Are we still friends?"

"I didn't leave, did I? Would I still be here if we weren't friends?" I shook my head. Dave sighed and put his mug down. "You said some hurtful things, Jade. It's going to take a while."

"I know. I did and said some awful things to both of you, that much is clear. I regret every one now."

"Yeah, you did, and you should. Do you even remember half the things you said?"

"Some of it. I know I tried to bargain my way out."

"Let's hope it's some of the less harsh words you can remember. That was only the start of it."

I closed my eyes. "What else did I do?"

"To me or Mark?"

"Either. Both."

He leant against the counter. "Do you really want to know?"

I looked at him steadily for a few seconds. "No, but maybe I need too."

He sighed. "I'll let Mark tell you what you said to him." He looked away from me, clearing his throat.

I sighed as well. "Dave, I've got a long way to go to come back from this. Let me know what I'm up against"  
He looked up at me once more. "Well, you decided to let me know exactly why my marriage failed." I winced slightly, but had a horrible feeling that it was only the beginning. "Told me how bad I was in bed. Said that I wasn't worth a damn, that I was useless and people would never see me as any different." I hid my face in my hands, unable to look at him. "But you want to know what hurt the most?"

I swallowed against the huge lump that was in my throat. "Go on."

Dave looked down at the floor. "When you told me that our friendship didn't mean a thing, then went on to tell me all the things wrong with it, that I was nothing but someone to amuse you when you were bored."

"I said that?" I asked in a choked voice.

"That's the watered down version," he stated flatly, still not looking at me.

I shuddered slightly. "Give it to me straight, Dave."

"No! Do you know how hard it was to hear them? How much it fucking hurt? I don't want to repeat them!" He turned away from me and leant on the counter, head hung down.

"You are the second most important person in my life and I hate what I've done to you."

"What's done is done," he said quietly. "I may not like you right now, Jade, but I still love you." He rested his head against a cupboard and sighed. "You almost lost him, Jade."

My head jerked up quickly. "I don't remember. If I said half the stuff to him it sounds like I said to you, I don't know why I'm still here."

"What you said to him was worse," he stated flatly.

"I guess I'll hear about it sooner than I'd like to."

Dave looked back over his shoulder at me. "If he tells you. Deep down I think he's more torn up about it than I am." I sank my head into my hands just as Mark walked in, clearing his throat.

"Shower's ready."

"And that's my cue to leave," Dave said quickly, collecting his coffee and heading out of the room. I didn't move.

"Jade, the shower's ready," Mark repeated. "I left some clothes on my bed for you."

"Tell me what I did," I muttered.

He cleared his throat again. "Water'll run cold." He turned away and headed in the direction of his room. I ran after him, following him to his room. "These OK for you?" he asked, gesturing to some clothes lying on the bed.

"Forget about the damn clothes for a minute." He stood and looked at me steadily. "Tell me what I did."

He shrugged. "You yelled a lot, begged a lot and hit a lot, not much to tell really." I gave him a frankly disbelieving look. "You want to see the marks?" He attempted a laugh but it didn't work very well.

"It's more what I said," I prompted.

"They were just words." He glanced at me. "Sometimes it's better if you don't know some things."

"Please, Mark."

"No, Jade." He glanced at me and sighed. "Come give me a hug." I stumbled over to him. He wrapped his arms around me and rested his chin on my head. "Some things are better off not bein' known, Jade."

I held on to him tightly for a minute. "I'd better go get that shower."

He pulled back. "Yeah. You want me to wait out here?" I smiled my agreement and collected my clothes, heading for the shower. I came out a few minutes later, dressed and towelling my hair dry to see him lying on his back, a pillow over his head. I called his name softly and heard a muffled response. Dropping the towel on the laundry hamper, I walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. He pulled the pillow off his head. "Nice shower?" I nodded. "Good." He stretched out a hand and gently rubbed my arm.

"Talk to me, Mark."

"I am talkin' to you. Yep, mouth's movin', words are comin' out. Yep, that's talkin'," he chuckled.

"You know what I mean. Dave said I almost lost you." He stopped rubbing my arm. "That thought is killing me," I continued.

"Yeah well, you ain't lost me so there's no point worryin' about it. So don't. Look dar… Look, just don't worry about it."

"That tells me it was really bad," I whispered.

"Tellin' someone not to worry about somethin' usually means things are OK." He sighed. "Jade, just don't. You don't need to know." He laid his head on the pillow, staring at the ceiling.

"I think I do."

"I think you don't," he countered.

I heaved a sigh. "We never could agree to disagree." Mark chuckled. "I just feel like a total shit and want to get it all over."

"Then forget about it and it'll be over," he stated.

"I know you better than that," I said quietly.

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "You ain't goin' to let this drop, are you?" I shook my head. He sat up. "I ain't tellin'. Do you really think me tellin' you will make you feel better, Jade? Don't you think there's a reason I don't want to tell you?"

"It's not just going to go away. No matter how much you tell me to drop it, it won't go away. I'll always be wondering. I'd be worried to say anything, do anything in case it has anything to do with it."

"Jade, please…"

"Mark, I want to know what I did."

Mark rose from the bed and started pacing. "I can't tell you cos I know what it'll do to you. I can still protect you."

"This is the same as what happened after the drinking. You've protected me as much as you can. Something needs to be different. It didn't work last time."

"No, Jade!"

"Maybe I should go home. This isn't getting us anywhere."

"I just got you back. I don't want you to go."

"I don't want to go but we're going to end up arguing if I stay. I don't want to argue with you."

"And I don't want you to lose me!" he shouted. I took a step backwards in shock and sank my head into my hands.

"I don't want that either," I said quietly.

"Nearly ever word you said to me runs through my head over and over again. If I say 'em out loud I don't know what I'll do."

"That's the part that I'm worried about, that they're there over and over."

He looked away from me. "Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you." I braced myself for what was about to come. Mark sat back on the bed and clenched his fists. "Every time you weren't with me you were with Dave, fucking his brains out cos I wasn't doin' enough for you." I closed my eyes, trying to stop the tears that I knew were going to fall sooner rather than later. I opened them again to see Mark staring unseeingly straight ahead. "Sara was lucky she got out while she did but it was bad for you cos now you were stuck with me and you felt sorry for Amber for havin' to put up with me for the next 13 years, at least you could get out of it." The tears started to fall as Mark lowered his voice. "No one would ever love me cos all they see is dollar signs. That's exactly what you saw when I showed an interest and that I was goin' to die a lonely old man with a woman who didn't love me and with a body that wouldn't work."

"Is there more?" I asked hesitantly. Mark breathed hard, clenching his fists harder still.

"You told me that you didn't love me, that I was just a toy and you could never love someone like me. You said you'd rather spend the rest of your life bored by Ben than to spend another minute with me and that you wouldn't be surprised if I eventually started hittin' you cos Sara couldn't be all wrong..."

I moved slightly away from him, jerkily, convulsively, as the horror of what I had done to him hit me. "Was there more?" I whispered, wrapping my arms around myself as I started to shiver. I really didn't want to hear it, but I'd started now and had to finish.

"Just a lot of yellin' of the same things using different words. You seemed to like quotin' the article. You also seemed to favour the washed up old man who should have retired a long time ago line too." He hunched over, leaning his elbows on his knees and holding one hand in the other. I stretched out one hand to lay it on his shoulder but he moved away and stood up.

"None of it was true." He just looked at me and went to stand by the window looking out. "None of it…" Mark turned to look at me, but remained by the window, leaning against the ledge. "I would never have said anything like that if my head had been right."

"I know," he replied softly.

"Dave was right, it was much much worse. I had too much ammo to throw at you."

"And you used every bit of ammo you had," he said, a bitter edge to his voice. He sat on the windowsill, still just watching me. "Can you see now why I didn't want to tell you?"

I hung my head. "I don't know if I can do this. How do we get back from that?"

"We'll manage," he sighed. "We always do."

"I just… I need some air." I pushed myself up from the bed and headed for the door.

"Jade, wait!" he called. I stopped but didn't turn. I heard the window being opened behind me. "We can't… we can't just leave this."

"I don't know what to say, what to do," I ground out.

Mark walked over to me, stopping just behind me. "We need to do somethin'. I don't know what either, but I do know we can't leave things like this and go off to think," he finished in a low voice.

"Does that have some hidden meaning?" I asked in a slightly bitter tone. He didn't answer. "I just want some air. I won't even step off the porch."

"I opened the window for you," he pointed out.

I felt an incredible urge to get out of there, just run away and never go back, never think about it again. I changed the subject to cover my confusion. "Don't suppose there's any cigarettes in my stuff?"

"In the bedside cabinet," he replied, sighing and dropping his head slightly as I went to fetch them. I pulled out the packet and my lighter and took a couple of steps back towards the door before stopping.

"I can't do or say anything to take it back. I feel so damned helpless!"

"So do I, Jade, so do I."

I gave a small grim chuckle. "Should have listened to you."

Mark turned to me and lifted his head, showing the ghost of a smile on his face. "When have you ever listened before?"

"Not my strong point," I allowed. Mark sat on the bed with a heavy sigh. "Never got myself in quite this much shit before, either."

"Maybe not, but we'll get through it. We always do."

I lifted my head and looked at him, eyebrow raised. "You trying to tell me I should just shut up and listen to you for once?"

He flashed me a small grin. "You should listen to me all the time."

I shook my head a little. "Not going to happen, deadman."

"Didn't think it would," he replied with a shrug.

"Ack, you know you lo…" I stopped suddenly. Mark sat there and looked up at me. I turned away a little, unable to face him directly.

"I do," he said simply.

"I don't understand why."

He tried to chuckle, although it didn't work incredibly well. "Neither do I."

"Must be mad," I muttered.

"Well, I have been gettin' hit in the head with steel chairs and god know what else for the last sixteen years."

I gave him a small smile. "It's starting to show."

"Hey," he said indignantly. "I'm not that bad, little girl."

"Oh, you can be."

"Oh yeah?" he asked with a little smile.

"Oh yeah," I shot back with a slight laugh.

"This is why I love you." I lifted my head and gave him a questioning look. "Because no matter what, you can always make me forget about the bad stuff."

"Even when I am the bad stuff?" I asked hesitantly.

"Yeah," he said softly.

"So I exist to be laughed at?" I tried to look put out.

"Purdy much."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yep. Problem?" He grinned properly at last. I nodded, fighting a grin of my own. "Gonna do somethin' about it?" He raised a challenging eyebrow.

"Don't try me." I shook my head at him.

"Or what, you'll make me famous?"

"Last time you ended up on your knees," I pointed out.

"I'm prepared for it this time."

"There's more than one way to bring a man to his knees." I crossed my arms and tapped a foot against the ground.

"I'm scared," he chuckled. "Shakin' in my boots." He shook his head and looked down. I walked over to the bed and sat down near him. He turned to look at me, leaning his elbows on his knees.

"Come here?" He scooted over towards me a little. "Nah, right here. I want a hug." He moved to sit right next to me and hesitated. I frowned as he slowly pulled me into his arms, body a little tense. I sat there not moving for a minute, hands shoved in my pockets. Mark sighed and put his face down into the crook of my neck.

"Sorry, this is just… It's just goin' to take a little gettin' used to again, I guess." I took a hand out of my pocket and pulled at his arm, pulling until he had to stand in front of me, which he did, looking down at me.

"Come down here." He knelt down, looking a bit puzzled. I took hold of his hands and looked into his eyes. "Told you I'd get you on your knees."

He shot up to his feet growling. "I thought you were goin' to say somethin' important."

Realising that I had not picked the best time for that kind of joke, I beckoned him down again. "Come down here and I will." He looked a little doubtful, but knelt again when I pulled on his hands, still with an aggravated expression. "I can't promise that I'll never do anything stupid again but I will do my utmost not to." His face softened as he glanced up at me. "I love you and I would never, never willingly hurt you."

"You have done...a lot." He turned his head away as he admitted that.

"I know," I sighed.

Mark looked back at me and then wrapped his arms round my waist, putting his head in my lap. "Let's just forget about it for now. I've got you back and I don't want to ruin it by sayin' somethin' stupid."

I rested my hands on his head. "If there's anything you want to say then maybe now is the time to do it so we can put all this behind us."

He shook his head gently. "I'm good."

"Sure?" I asked quietly.

He paused for a second. "Yeah, I'm sure."

"Come on then," I said, fidgeting a little. "I want to go kill off a bit more of my lungs and then I need some sleep." Mark chuckled and got to his feet, pulling me up with him. I watched him out of the corned of my eye. "I'm going to go out on the porch, OK?"

He nodded. "I think I'm going to lay down for a bit."

I nodded. "I'll see you in the morning then."

Mark frowned. "Why? Where are you plannin' on sleepin'?"

I glanced away for a second. "Didn't think you'd want me in here."

"Well," he said slowly, "I was plannin' on keepin' the bed warm for you."

I smiled, trying to hold back more tears as a rush of emotion towards him came through me again. "OK, I'll be back up soon." He smiled and watched me leave. I went and sat on the porch, smoking my cigarettes and daring to believe that one day it might all be OK again.


	30. Chapter 30

A/N: Yeah, I know I've been slacking. Don;t worry, I have been getting earache for it. I've had a few real life bits of stuff to deal with that have got in the way. I'll try to be better in future...

I chose to stay with Mark in those days after I came out of the basement. Actually, chose would probably be the wrong word. I never suggested that I leave, but I got the distinct impression that it would not have been welcomed if I had. He had just got me back and seemed to have no intention of letting me go until he had to. I didn't see Dave again after I came out. It appeared that he had left as soon as he could after finding out I had come out.

Those first few days were very difficult at times. Yes, I shared Mark's bed, but that was as far as it went. As the week passed though things began to get back more to normal. The terms of endearment that he had restrained himself from using came back and he slowly began to touch me without tensing first. It hurt me every time he stopped before laying a hand on me, but I tried to conceal it. Every morning I woke up knowing that I deserved to hurt after what I had done to him. As things improved I dwelled on it less and less, throwing myself into whatever I needed to do to get our relationship back on track. I knew we were succeeding when he told me he was going to pick his daughter up and bring her home.

That was the reason I was pacing restlessly from one end of the kitchen to the other, head cocked on one side and listening for the sound of Mark's truck. With the exception of Todd and Ellie, my track record with children was totally dismal. One glance from me was often enough to make them cry. It had never really worried me before, but this was different. It was important to my future that I got on with this kid. I stopped suddenly as the unmistakable noise of a truck pulling up outside was followed by first one door opening and closing and then another. I felt like crossing myself as my nerves increased markedly.

"OK, deep breaths Jade," I muttered to myself. "This is a little girl, not the devil incarnate." Of course, I had to allow myself an ironic smile at the thought of who her father was. My conversation with myself was cut short by the sound of the front door closing firmly.

"Jade?" Mark called.

"Yeah, I'm here." I walked out of the kitchen and into the hallway, pasting a smile on my face. Mark stood there, holding his daughter in his arms. There was no mistaking the fact that it was his daughter. The long auburn hair was a dead giveaway. Mark smiled at me and then looked down at his little girl.

"Baby, this is the woman I was telling you about." The small child and I regarded each other for long seconds.

"Hi, Amber," I said finally. Amber sank nervously further against Mark, hiding herself against him.

Mark chuckled. "Come on, sweetheart. I know you ain't shy."

"Hi…" she said in a tiny quiet voice.

"It's good to meet you at last," I lied, hoping I sounded convincing. Amber stayed silent, and Mark bounced her gently in his arms.

"It's good to meet you too, ma'am," he prompted. I flashed him a glare at the word 'ma'am' but he just rolled his eyes at me and mouthed 'Manners.'

"Your daddy's told me a lot about you," I went on when it became clear that Amber wasn't going to say a word. She looked at me with familiar green eyes and then hid her face in Mark's neck. I laughed gently. "You have your daddy's eyes." Mark chuckled again and started towards the kitchen.

"Come on, let's get some drinks and snacks so we can all get to know each other. That sound good to you, angel?" Amber nodded, head still buried in his neck and Mark flashed me a quick smile over her head. I shook my head at him and mouthed 'See?' He mouthed back 'She's just shy,' and walked into the kitchen. Setting Amber down on the counter, he headed to the refrigerator. "You want anything, darlin'?" I followed along behind in a little world of my own. Mark glanced up from the fridge. "Baby girl? You want anything?"

I came to myself and smiled at him. "Some milk would be good, thanks."

Out of the corner of my eye I watched Amber fiddling with her T-shirt. "I like milk," she said quietly.

"I guess we have something in common then," I said brightly.

She still wouldn't look at me. "You like cookies?"

"I love cookies."

Mark brought milk and cookies over to where Amber was sat. "Yeah well, this one's a cookie monster!" He put the snacks down and lunged at Amber, causing her to giggle madly, before settling down and picking up her drink.

The five year old sipped her milk and peered up at me shyly. "I like your necklace."

"Thank you. I like it as well," I replied, putting a hand on the platinum necklet that Mark had returned to me when we had got back together properly. Amber turned towards Mark who raised his eyebrows, trying to encourage her. She looked back at me, clearly trying hard to think of something to say. I could sympathise as I was struggling every bit as much as she was.

Mark stood up from where he had been leaning on the counter and caught my eye. "You OK watching her for a minute?"

"Er, sure, I guess…" I caught his grin as he walked out of the room and shook my head ruefully as I saw how well he had played me. I turned back to the small girl sat on the counter. "So, er, what do you like to do?"

Amber wiped cookie crumbs away with the back of her hand and looked thoughtful. "I like wrestling with my daddy, and, er… I like dancing."

I nodded slowly. "You'll have to show me sometime. Hey, I just thought of something else we have in common!" She gazed up at me curiously. "You know what amber is?"

"Um, me?"

I smiled. "Yes, that's right, but it's also a kind of precious stone."

A genuine wide smile came across her face. "My daddy says I'm precious."

"There you go then," I replied. "Well, my name is Jade, and that's another kind of precious stone."

"He says you're precious too." I glanced over at her. She nodded while attempting to sip her milk at the same time. "Uh huh. He says you're real special and precious."

I was at a bit of a loss for something to say. That just didn't sound to me like something Mark would say but, then again, what reason would his daughter have to lie to me?

"Well… that's nice then, isn't it?"

"Yeah…" Amber looked away and then glanced back shyly. "Can I ask something?" I nodded. "You won't get mad?" she asked uncertainly.

"Promise," I said, wondering what on earth she could have to ask that I might get mad about.

"Promise promise?" she pushed.

"Cross my heart," I replied, intrigued as to what it could be.

She held out her hand, pinkie finger extended. "Pinkie promise?"

I held back a grin as I did the same, solemnly shaking pinkies. "Pinkie promise."

Amber looked down at the floor and played with her milk glass. "Are you going to be nicer to me than my mommy was?"

Of all the things I had thought it might be, that idea had never entered my head. "What makes you say that, sweetheart?" I asked, confused.

She didn't lift her head. "She always said I was a pain, there was another thing she called me but I'm not allowed to say it. And she hardly ever let Daddy come over to play!"

"You can tell me sweetheart. You're not going to get into trouble," I said gently.

She shook her head so fast it was almost a surprise that it didn't fall off. "Daddy says it's a sweared word."

"Yeah, Daddy knows more about them than most," I muttered. Raising my voice, I spoke to Amber again. "How about you whisper it in my ear?"

She peeked at me through her fringe. "You won't tell on me?"

I held out a hand. "Pinkie promise."

She smiled, although it faded quickly, and leaned over to whisper in my ear. "Little bitch."

A hard spike of anger went through my head, surprising me with its intensity. I may not have been too keen on kids but that was way beyond my comprehension, especially when said to your own child. The pain in that little girl's voice brought out a hitherto unknown protective streak in me.

"Oh Amber, that was a terrible thing for her to say to you." I tried to keep the anger I felt out of my voice, thinking she needed sympathy, not fury.

Amber looked down sadly. "It's cos I was bad a lot. She used to say I was too like Daddy… Is that a bad thing?" She raised her eyes to meet mine. "I don't think it is."

I smiled at her. "That's not a bad thing at all. As far as I'm concerned it's a very good thing."

Amber grinned up at me. "Are you feeling better now?" I gave her a puzzled glance. "Daddy said you were sick, and that was why I had to go stay with Grandma."

"Oh, right. Yes, I'm better now."

"Cos if you're not I can take care of you! I got a nurse's kit! Hey," she continued quietly. "Want to see something horrible my grandma gave me?" I frowned slightly but nodded. Amber held her arms out to me and, after a brief moment of panic, I picked her up and put her on the floor, following along behind when she ran off to find her bag in the hall. She bent down, rummaging in the bag and turned back to me, holding out her hand. In it, looking straight at me, was a bloody doll. I struggled to make a coherent sound, but only managed to go rigid and start shaking. Amber's eyes opened wide at my reaction. "Daddy!" she shouted at the top of her voice. "DADDY!"

Mark came barrelling into the hallway slightly out of breath, obviously having run full pelt from wherever he had been. "What is it? What's happened?"

"Something's wrong with Jade."

Mark looked over to me. "Baby girl?" It was all I could do to shake my head and my eyes felt like they were about to fall out of my head they were open so wide. Mark grabbed me by the shoulders and forced me to look at him. "Baby girl?" he said again, a little more sternly.

"D… d… doll," I managed to stutter out.

Mark looked confused for a moment and then glanced down, catching sight of the doll in Amber's hand. "Shit," he muttered.

"You swored," Amber said indignantly.

Mark took the doll from her hand. "Where did you get that?" I took a few hasty steps backwards when it was in his hand.

"Grandma gave it to me. I think she forgot I don't like them. Daddy, you got to put ten dollars in the swear jar." Mark growled and stuffed the doll back in Amber's bag. She held out her hand. "Ten dollars, Daddy." Mark grumbled and pulled out his wallet, handing a bill to Amber who ran off with it. "Don't forget to tell Jade about the jar," she called back over her shoulder as she left.

He grumbled and turned back to me. "You alright, darlin'?" I eyed Amber's bag nervously. He walked over to me. "It's alright, baby girl. It's gone. C'mere." He pulled me into his arms. "You're shakin' like a leaf," he said as I buried my face in his chest. "Mom's memory ain't so good sometimes. She forgets Amber hates dolls."

"She said it was nasty," I whispered.

Mark chuckled gently. "If I'd known she had it I would have left it in the truck." My breathing started to return to normal as Amber came screeching back up to us, colliding with our legs.

"Did you tell her about the jar yet?" she burst out excitedly.

"What is this jar?" I asked in a voice that was still a little shaky.

Amber grinned. "If someone swears then you got to put some money in the swear jar! A nickel for me and ten dollars if you're a grown up then at the end of the month Daddy gets the nickels and buys stuff for me with the dollars."

"Must get a lot of dollars when you're here," I smiled.

Amber giggled. "Yeah, Daddy's got a potty mouth."

"Going to fill up quick if I'm here as well," I muttered quietly. Mark covered the smile that broke out when he heard me. Amber reached up suddenly and grabbed my hand, making me jump and look down at her.

"Will you play monsters with me?"

I raised my eyebrows. "You think I'd be good at monsters?"

She nodded. "You looked good at it when you were playing with Daddy. I was really scared." She giggled as I tried to hide the wince that ran through me.

"Yeah," I said quietly. "I've had some practice."

She switched her gaze to Mark. "Daddy, you going to play too?"

Mark laughed. "I don't know, I think Jade's got the scary monster part down." I shoved him, glaring. "Oh, you're for it now," he growled.

Amber jumped on Mark's leg. "Get him," she shouted gleefully.

He staggered backwards a couple of steps. "Hey! You're supposed to be on my side!" He looked up at me with a grin. "You're already turning her against me."

"Must be my natural charm." I shrugged and grabbed his other side.

He growled low in his throat again and bent down, picking the pair of us up effortlessly and slinging one over each shoulder. "I think you two need a little swim." Amber squealed and started kicking and I struggled a bit. Mark wobbled slightly. "It was a little easier with one of you." Amber kicked a little too hard and caught him in the groin with her foot. He stiffened and bit his lip hard, going slightly red with the effort of not shouting out. I saw what was coming and started to push myself off his shoulder just as he dropped me, bending down to place Amber carefully on the floor. "Go play in your room for a little while, baby," he wheezed.

"Aw, but Daddy…" she whined.

"Tell you what Amber, you go play for a while and we'll swim later, OK?" I said quickly, worried about Mark.

"Really?" She grinned and ran off.

Mark fell against the wall, letting out a huge breath. "Oh fuck." I stepped over to him and put a hand on his back. He leaned his forehead against the wall. "I bet you're finding this real funny, ain't you darlin'?" I shook my head. He turned his head towards me, a small smile on his face. "Seemed to find it pretty funny when it was you tryin' to destroy 'em."

"That was different. Besides, I've done it more than once." Mark took a few deep breaths, turning to lean his back against the wall and gave me a look that clearly asked me how I'd got on with Amber. "She's miles ahead of me," I grinned. "Hell, she's five years old and can get money out of a man and damn near bring him to his knees already. She's going to go far."

Mark glared at me and growled low in his throat. "Yeah well, it's you who's going to have to kiss them better later, darlin'." He smirked down at me as I stared up, eyebrow raised. "Oh yeah," he continued, with a rattle of his tongue bar. I closed my eyes briefly and shivered. When I opened them again he stood up from the wall with a slight wince. "So how'd it go?" I answered with a frown. "What?"

"Some of the stuff she told me. I could just…" I paused to calm myself. "You know, I could seriously hurt someone right now." Mark looked anxious and moved a hand to guard his crotch. It dragged a reluctant smile from me. "No, not you. Fucking Sara." An angry look crossed his face. "Oh yeah, she told me a lot." The anger became tinged with surprise. "I could rip her apart right now."

"How much did she tell you, darlin'?"

"You know what she asked me? If I was going to be nicer to her than her mommy was."

Mark frowned and gave a little sigh. "She's just a little scared, baby girl."

"It was the rest of it that got to me." Mark pulled me into his arms and rested his chin on my head. "A kid that age shouldn't be called thing like that, shouldn't hear things like that."

"I know, darlin', and I would rip Sara limb from limb if I could," he rumbled. He glanced down at the furious expression I was wearing. "Guess I should make sure you're on the road when she comes to visit, huh?" he chuckled.

"Might be a good idea," I muttered with a grimace.

He dropped a kiss on the top of my head. "She likes you, you know."

"She's cute," I replied and then looked surprised that those words had come out of my mouth in relation to a child.

"Course, she's my kid." He shrugged as if that explained everything.

"There you go with the ego again." I smiled up at him.

"Hey, when you see that kid how can you say I'm not perfect?"

I grinned as something Amber had said came to the front of my mind. "Oh, and I'm special and precious, huh?" Mark thought for a second and then groaned. "I could quite get to like the kid," I grinned.

"Shit, I can see I'm going to be in a whole load of trouble."

I held out my hand. "That'll be ten dollars."

He gave me a wicked grin. "Fuck off."

"Oh, twenty then," I laughed.

"Kiss my ass," he replied, shrugging.

I raised an eyebrow. "Only if you're lucky."

"Oh, I'm lucky alright." The eyebrow I had raised went a little closer to my hairline. "Yeah," he continued. "Cos it ain't going to be my ass I'm going to have you kissing, darlin'." He leered slightly at me.

"Oh yeah?" I asked, puzzled.

"Uh huh." He buried his face in my neck. "The boys need a good seeing to too."

I lifted my head slightly. "Yeah?"

Mark chuckled and nuzzled into my neck a little further. "Oh yeah."

I smiled slowly and closed my eyes, revelling in the sensation of his beard against my skin. "We're finally getting there." He made an enquiring noise and I leaned my head in against his. "We're finally getting towards that happy ever after."

"Told you we'd make it," he said softly.

"Never did learn to listen though."

He picked his head up and grinned down at me. "Maybe it's time you did."

"Still never going to happen, deadman," I replied, a hint of challenge in my words.

"It will, I'm never wrong," he stated, utter conviction in his voice.

"Course not, you're perfect," I teased.

"Glad to see you're finally admitting it now, darlin'," he grinned.

"Course, I have a partner in crime now," I mused.

Mark groaned and leant his head back against the wall. "I am in so much trouble."

"Certainly are," I laughed. "Still, it won't be long before you're here and I'm on the road." I sighed quietly, the smile fading from my face.

Mark lifted his head and looked straight into my eyes. "It won't be for long. You'll be back here before you know it and I'll be back on the road in a month or so."

"Until Mania," I pointed out quietly.

"We'll get by. There's always phone sex," he said, fighting for a straight face.

I shook my head at him, pretending to be disgusted. "That reminds me, I still haven't replaced my phone."

"We can go shopping for one before you leave." I gave him an incredulous look, amused by the idea of him shopping. "What can I say? I like spending money on my girls," he smiled.

I smiled in return. "And now I guess this girl had better keep her promise to the other girl and go for a swim."

"Damn straight you had better or she'll hunt you down."

"Now that does scare me," I laughed.

Mark chuckled. "Don't blame you."

I stepped away from him regretfully. "I'd better go find her."

Mark released me. "Her room's down the hall from ours." I looked up at him and smiled. "What?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Just nice to hear," I shrugged.

"I don't know why I even bother to try and figure you out sometimes." He chuckled again and kissed me on the forehead before swatting me on the ass. "Get."

"I'm going." I turned and headed for the hallway. Mark gave a little wolf whistle behind me. I stopped and looked back. "See something you like, babe?" I asked with a grin.

"Always," he replied softly. I smiled and headed to the stairs to find his daughter.

To my great surprise, I thoroughly enjoyed spending the entire afternoon with Amber. We spent a long time in the pool, splashing and playing before climbing out reluctantly when it was time to eat. After food, the three of us crashed in front of the TV and watched a couple of movies, right up until Mark announced it was time for him to put Amber to bed. She complained sleepily for a while but subsided when Mark picked her up and started heading for the stairs.

"You tired her out pretty good," he commented when he came back down, dropping onto the couch next to me and pulling me into his side, arm wrapped around me to rest his hand on my hip. I smiled up at him and snuggled in, arm thrown across his body, and enjoyed the simple closeness as we watched TV for a while. There was no real conversation but it wasn't an awkward silence either. It was just very pleasant to sit there on the couch together in peace after the inevitable rumpus that an excitable five year old can cause effortlessly.

I was still finding that I got tired easily and at one point my eyes started to drift closed. Mark obviously glanced down just in time to see it happen as he chuckled and gave me a gentle shake.

"Time for you to get up those stairs, baby girl," he said softly, pushing me up to a sitting position. "I'll be up when I've locked up." I nodded and trailed up the stairs, hearing the TV shut off and the sounds of windows and doors being checked and locked.

I climbed the stairs and walked along the hallway to our room. By habit I slept naked except when sharing with someone other than Mark on the road. Since I had come out of the basement however there had been a strange sort of shyness that had prompted me to start wearing one of Mark's T-shirts to sleep in. I changed ready for sleep and sat on the end of the bed, absorbed in my thoughts. I was so engrossed that I didn't even hear Mark come into the room, and only realised he was there when he dropped onto the bed behind me, one leg either side of mine.

"Look like you're thinkin' hard there, darlin'. Care to share?" he asked quietly, pulling me back against his chest and nestling his chin in the crook of my neck.

"I was just thinking about going back to work. The family emergency line will only hold water for so long so I was thinking I'd go back in a week or so. I'm not quite ready yet." I leant back against him and felt goose bumps rise as he turned his head, rubbing his goatee against the sensitive skin.

"You go back when you're ready, baby girl. Some things are more important than a job," he murmured before trailing gentle kisses down the back of my neck. My head dropped forward and I made a contented noise in my throat as he retraced the path with his tongue. This was definite progress from where we had reached up to that point. He sat back from me slightly and got hold of the bottom of the T-shirt I was wearing, giving it a little shake. I glanced back over my shoulder at him and saw the raised eyebrow and slight smile on his face as he pulled the material up slightly. I realised what he wanted and that he was, in his way, asking if I was ready for this.

My reply was to stand quickly and strip the garment off, throwing it to the side. Turning, I straddled his legs as he sat on the edge of the bed. He placed his hands on my hips and then skimmed them up over my skin, moving inwards slightly to catch a breast in each hand. He moulded them gently in his palms, moving his thumbs to brush over my nipples. My head tipped back for a second as I felt the flesh tightening. Lifting it once more, I glanced at his face and my breath caught in my throat as I saw the intensity of the expression there. I tipped forward and kissed him, gently at first until he wrapped his arms round me and pulled me tight up against him turning the kiss into a fierce demanding one, full of desire and need. I pushed forward into his body, feeling as if I could never get close enough to him.

Mark's hands shifted down to my hips once more and he moved me a little, allowing me to feel the prominent bulge in his jeans and leaving me in absolutely no doubt of what he wanted. The intensity of the kiss changed again, returning to the gentler pace of the beginning. I could feel a wave of emotion rising already as he broke the kiss and lay back on the bed, looking up at me kneeling over his body. I moved myself a little further up his body and began to undo the buttons of his shirt, tipping forwards to trail little kisses over his chest and stomach as I uncovered them. His fingers tangled in my hair as I worked my way steadily down, pulling them free only as he lifted his hips to allow me to work his jeans down his legs.

I gave him a crooked grin as I leaned over his body once more. His eyes followed my fingers as they trailed softly over the hard lines of his chest and further down his stomach. Just before my fingertips reached his groin I lifted them from his skin, laughing gently at the deep growl sounding from his throat.

"Patience," I muttered quietly, settling myself kneeling on the floor between his knees. A gentle tug on his calf brought him scooting to the end of the bed, keenly anticipating what I was about to do. I took a firm hold of him and ran my tongue from base to tip before closing my mouth over the end, hearing him groan and stifle a curse. I set up a slow steady rhythm with both mouth and hand, and was slightly confused when he stopped me soon after. I glanced up to see him leaning up on one elbow, gazing down at me as he held my chin gently in the other hand.

"Not like that, baby girl. Not this time." He sat up and held out a hand to me. I took it and allowed him to pull me to my feet, laughing out loud when he collapsed backwards, pulling me with him so I landed on his chest. He smiled up at me for a few seconds and then rolled us over, supporting his weight on his elbows as he regarded me steadily. "You ready for this, darlin'?" he asked quietly, tilting his head to the side. I reached up and pulled on his shoulders, bringing him down for a searing kiss and rolled my body, almost forcing my groin up to meet his. Mark rumbled deep in his chest and slid a hand down between our bodies, running a finger slowly through the folds of my labia to ensure I was truly ready for him. When he found I was, he lined himself up and pushed forward so very slowly.

I broke the kiss and groaned loudly, my head dropping back as the wonderful sensation of fullness overcame me. My legs wrapped high around his waist as he kept to the same slow pace, and one of his hands trailed down the side of my face and neck, dipping to catch my breast even as he turned his face into my neck. My hands were never still, stroking softly up and down his arms and shoulders, reaching around to gently scratch up his back and then smoothing down over the skin, the speed and pressure of my touch steadily increasing as I began to move with him. The emotion of the moment didn't diminish, even as the pure sensation increased. In a strange way it felt as if this was the very first time we had made love.

"Jade… hell…," Mark whispered as he increased the speed and force of his strokes. He moved his hands up to cup my face, forcing me to meet his intense gaze as he drove us both on to a peak. For the second time that I could remember, my orgasm was accompanied by tears. There was no regret to these tears, although I was so choked by emotion that I didn't make a sound as my muscles contracted and released in climax. I couldn't even reply to what Mark said as he rested his head on the bed, breathing hard and recovering from his own release. "God, I love you," he murmured, turning his face towards me and raising a hand slowly to wipe the tears from my face. I saw that I didn't need to reply to what he had said. He already knew.


	31. Chapter 31

I held to my plan of spending another week with Mark and Amber and then going back to work. The time went by far quicker than I would have liked as I had found myself loving every second of the time spent with them. Somehow there seemed to have been an instant bond between me and Amber and that only increased as the days went by. All too soon the time for me to leave and go back on the road had come. The morning I was due to fly out I stood in the hallway of Mark's house, looking at my bags around me and wishing desperately that I didn't have to go.

"I think I'm all packed," I sighed.

"Don't say it like that baby girl, it's not for long," Mark said from his position near the front door.

I offered him a small tight smile. "I know. I could get used to this though."

"Well I sure do hope so, we kind of like havin ya around."

Amber caught my attention as she sat on the floor and sniffled, so I walked over to her and crouched down to her level. "Hey, like your daddy said, I'll be coming back soon."

"I don't wantcha to go," Amber whispered miserably.

"I have to go sweetheart. It's my job." The little girl sniffled again and launched herself at me, wrapping her arms tightly around me neck. "It's only for a few weeks, then I'll see you again."

She laid her head on my shoulder. "You gonna call me?"

"Every night, promise."

"Pinkie promise?" she asked, lifting her head slightly.

I smiled gently. "Yeah, pinkie promise." I help up my hand and we solemnly shook pinkies. I glanced up at Mark to see him watching us with a big smile on his face. "You can think of all the things we're going to do when I get back."

That made her get to her feet, grinning. "Like torture Daddy?"

I couldn't help laughing at the fact that torturing Mark was now the first thing to come to her mind. "Yeah, torturing Daddy is good."

Mark groaned loudly and picked up my bags. "I'm gonna put these in the truck before I feel too unloved."

I whispered in Amber's ear quickly. "Think Daddy needs a hug?"

"Yeah!" she whispered loudly in return and ran out of the front door and straight at Mark, colliding with his legs and wrapping her arms around them. I wandered along behind her.

Mark chuckled and bent to pick Amber up, holding his other arm out towards me. "You gonna get in on this?" I grinned and joined in. Mark wrapped his arm round me and held me tight to him, kissing the top of my head. Amber tried desperately to wrap her arms around the pair of us.

I stood there enjoying the closeness for a few seconds before sighing deeply. "About time to get moving."

Mark echoed my sigh and placed Amber down on the floor. "Yeah I guess so. Say bye, Amber baby."

I crouched down to her again as she stared at the floor, sniffling once more. "Come on, you want that to be the last face I see before I go?" Amber looked up at me with a weak smile and shook her head. "That's better. Give me a hug then and you can get to plotting torture."

Amber hugged me tightly. "I'm gonna miss ya, Jade."

"I'll miss you too. I'll call you when I get there, first thing I'll do." I was rewarded for my promise with a big smile.

"Come on, baby girl, we gotta get," Mark said quietly from his place by the truck. I stood up and watched Amber run off into the house, trying desperately not to cry. I pulled a face and climbed into the truck. Mark climbed in beside me and started the engine, getting us on our way. I just stared out of the window, watching the ranch drive and then the road pass by.

"You okay over there, darlin'?" he asked after a while of riding in silence.

"Yeah, I guess."

He reached over to take my hand. "Don't sound too convinced."

"How do you do that? I've only known her a week! I've never not wanted to get on the road before."

He chuckled. "Yeah she has a habit of makin' ya feel like that." He sighed suddenly. "I'm gonna miss ya baby girl," he said quietly.

"I'll miss you too. It'll be weird going back to hotel rooms."

He cleared his throat. "About that... You're gonna be rooming with Glen."

"What?" I asked, puzzled and convinced that I had somehow heard him wrong.

"I just wanted someone to keep an eye on ya, darlin'."

"To watch me?" There was an edge of annoyance in my voice.

"To make sure you're ok."

"What do you think I'm going to do?"

"Nothing it's just…" He sighed. "I'm not gonna be anywhere near you, darlin'. I just wanna make sure you're ok. Anyway, it's already sorted now."

"And that's it, huh?"

"Baby girl, I'm not gonna see you for a while. I don't want our last moments together to be spent arguing."

I snorted. "Me either but that's being a bit high-handed."

He sighed once more. "I just wanted someone keeping an eye on you to make sure you're ok. You've been through a lot lately. I'm worried about you."

"I'll be perfectly alright," I insisted.

"Jade, please? Just go along with this for me."

I sighed quietly as he obviously wasn't going to drop it. "Okay, okay... I never could resist emotional blackmail." I grinned slightly, taking any possible sting out of my words, and saw him return the grin. "Why does it always take so long from the airport when you're coming home but is so quick when you're leaving?"

"Cause chances are you don't wanna be leaving." He smiled as he pulled into the car park.

"Got that right," I muttered, opening the door. Mark also got out and grabbed my bags. "Guess it won't do any good going slow."

He chuckled and dropped an arm round me. "None at all, baby girl." That didn't speed my footsteps up any as I trudged towards the buildings, or when he handed me my bags and told me that he'd wait while I went and checked in. I returned just a few minutes later, looking faintly indignant.

"Even the check in staff are efficient today." He chuckled and replaced his arm around my shoulders. I leant in against him and grumbled. "This sucks."

He put his other arm around me. "Yeah, it does."

I leant right in against him, making the most of it before I had to go, and caught sight of people watching us from out of the corner of my eye. "You'd better go. The adoring masses have noticed you."

Mark held me slightly closer to his body. "They can wait," he whispered.

I was amazed at that. It had never happened before. "First time for everything," I replied, grinning to myself.

He chuckled low in his chest. "I don't wanna let you go." He hugged me tighter still for a moment. "Glen will meet you at the airport."

I couldn't help rolling my eyes, still smarting a little at the way he had arranged things for me. "Fine." Not wanting to part on even slightly harsh words, I buried my face in his chest one last time. "I have to go."

Mark pulled back from me a little and gave me a quick kiss. "Love ya, darlin'."

"You too," I sighed. "Right, this is me leaving." I stood there, not even attempting to move a muscle.

Mark chuckled, holding my hands in his. "This is me making you."

I sighed heavily once more. "I really do have to go."

"Get going. Call me when you get there."

"Okay." I turned and started to walk away from him. Mark kept a hold of my hand for as long as he could and then let go, watching me leave. My head hung as I made my way to the gate, having to force myself to take every step. The return to work was being so much harder than I had ever thought it might. I stopped just as he was about to go out of my sight and turned back, seeing him still watching me. He gave me a small smile across the distance that separated us. I raised a reluctant hand and turned the corner, disappearing from his sight.

The flight was long and boring. It didn't help that I had got so used to travelling with other people from the company most of the time. I tried to read but my concentration span was minute. It was totally pathetic and I laughed at myself for it, but I spent most of the time trying to work out what might be going on at home.

That thought brought me up short as well. When had Mark's place become home? There was no denying that it was the place I thought of as home now. My apartment in the city had never been home. I had never really thought of myself as having what I would have regarded as a home in the United States. Suddenly it appeared, even if only in my own mind, that I now did.

It wasn't exactly difficult to spot Glen in the airport at the other end of the flight. He wore a cap and sunglasses and had his head tucked right down as he tried to lean unobtrusively against a wall, but his sheer size made him stand out a mile. I spotted him immediately and made my way over to him quickly. "Hey Glen."

He looked up and walked over, closing the gap between us. "Hey Jade." He reached out and grabbed my bags from me, turning to lead the way out of the airport building.

I couldn't hold in the bitter comment that leapt to my mind. "Ready for your guard duty then?"

"Yeah." He got to the truck, throwing the bags in the back. Climbing in, he started the engine, not saying a word as I settled myself in the seat.

I endured the silence for as long as I could before I spoke again. "OK Glen, out with it."

He glanced over at me. "What?"

I sighed. "I can tell you're pissed."

"I wouldn't say I was pissed."

I snorted. "Sure seems like it from over here."

He gripped the steering wheel hard. "Look, I'm just not too pleased about having to baby sit you."

I rolled my eyes. "Can't say I'm thrilled about it."

He glanced at me again. "I bet."

A spark of temper shot through me, prompting my mouth to take off. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Not a thing, Jade," he replied stiffly.

"Could have fooled me," I muttered.

"Just remember I'm a happily married man," he mumbled, not quite under his breath.

"What's that got to do with anything?" I spat, my head whirling to look at him.

"Mark's been talking to me," he stated, staring intently out of the windshield.

"And just what has he told you?" I couldn't believe that he would have heard the whole story. I knew he and Mark were close but I had a hard time believing that Mark would have told anyone exactly what I had done.

"Stuff," Glen replied evasively.

I resisted the urge to shout. "What stuff?" I tried hard not to let my annoyance show in my voice, knowing that it would only encourage Glen's obtuseness.

He glanced over at me again. "Everything." I looked over at him quickly, and he nodded. "Everything."

"Shit!" I exclaimed in disbelief.

"Why do you think you're with me and not Batista?"

I closed my eyes for several long seconds. "He really did tell you everything, didn't he?"

Glen pulled into the parking lot of the hotel and stopped the car, grabbing my bags before he got out. "Yep," he stated flatly.

I got out of the car slowly, reluctantly. "Are you going to give me shit about it?"

"Probably."

I shook my head. "Real helpful, Glen."

He led the way towards the hotel room we were going to be sharing. "I try my best," he commented as the elevator door shut behind us.

"Fucking succeeding too," I grumbled.

Glen unlocked the door when we reached our room. "Don't start getting an attitude with me, Jade."

"So much for putting it behind us." It really stuck in my throat. The last few days had been hard work for both of us as we had tried to move on from what had happened, and now I was thrown back into being made to feel bad about it. Don't get me wrong – I knew I deserved to feel bad and I still did more often than not. I didn't need any help to do that at all. It seemed as if I was going to have it though. The idea of putting up with this for weeks on end until Mark came back for his next stint on the road was really one I did not relish.

Glen threw my bag down and span to face me. "I don't know how he can!" he growled.

I turned my back on him. "I wake up with that thought every single day. I'm not proud of it."

"Good!" he exclaimed. "You shouldn't be. You don't even know half the hell you put Mark through."

That pricked at me, dispersing some of the anger. The memory of Mark's face as he had told me of the things I had said to him was still too fresh, too raw. I sank down onto the bed. "I know more than I can ever really cope with."

"You don't deserve to cope with any of it."

"Is this going to be it for the whole damn trip?" I burst out angrily.

"No. I thought we'd get this out of the way now."

"I have a phone call to make." I pointed at my phone, remembering that I had said to Amber that the first thing I would do would be to call her.

Glen nodded. "Right, I'm gonna shower and then we'll talk." I swore loudly as I picked the phone up. Glen ignored me and walked into the bathroom. The sound of the lock being turned viciously echoed through the room. I tried desperately to calm myself as I dialled the number and waited for Mark to answer.

"Hello?" I closed my eyes as his deep voice came down the line.

"It's me."

"Hey, baby girl." I could almost hear the smile in his voice. "Good flight?"

"Yeah," I said quietly, "Flight was fine."

He paused for a moment. "You OK?"

"Oh hell no," I said bitterly. "My moral guardian is just having a shower and is then going to give me the bollocking of my life."

Mark sighed heavily. "I told him not to say anything."

I continued as if he hadn't spoken. "Having already reminded me that he is a happily married man."

"He what?" I actually had to hold the phone away from my ear as Mark bellowed indignantly. "Give him the phone."

"He's in the shower." Suddenly, telling Mark what Glen had said seemed like a bad idea.

"He won't be in it yet. Give him the phone."

I got slowly to my feet and walked over to the bathroom door, knocking on it. "Glen?"

"What?" he called irritably from inside.

"Mark wants to speak to you." He growled and jerked the door open, emerging in just a pair of jeans and holding his hand out for the phone. I handed it over and took a couple of paces backwards. Glen raised the phone to his ear.

"Yeah? No… You can't expect me to keep quiet, man." He paused, listening to what Mark had to say. "Fine. Whatever… I said fine!" He gave me an annoyed look and tossed the phone back to me, slamming the bathroom door behind himself once more.

I lifted the phone and put it back to my ear. "That went down well."

Mark chuckled. "He'll be fine. He's a big teddy bear really. Just got to let his grizzly side out from time to time."

"I won't hold my breath," I muttered.

Mark laughed. "Hold on, baby. Yes it is." He sighed. "Got someone here who wants to talk to ya."

I couldn't stop the big smile that spread over my face. Somehow that little girl had really got to me. "Best hand me over then."

"Jade!" Amber's voice came loudly into my ear. "Daddy swored!" she said indignantly.

"Hey Amber. You'd better get the money then." The kid really was going to go far.

"Is Uncle Glen mad at you?" she asked.

"A bit, sweetheart," I admitted.

"What did you do?" she enquired curiously. "Steal his candy or something?"

I had to laugh at the innocent problems faced by little children. If only I had done something quite that simple. "No, I didn't steal his candy."

"Wow, you must have been real bad then!"

I nodded to myself. "I was, sweetheart. Very bad."

"Daddy says bad girls get grounded. Are you going to get grounded, Jade?"

I thought back to what I could remember of those days locked in the basement and sighed heavily. "I was grounded."

"Really? Well, that means you've learned your lesson then so Uncle Glen shouldn't be mad at you. You should yell at him."

I shook my head ruefully at the simplicity with which she viewed the world. "I might just try that."

She giggled. "I think Daddy wants to talk to you again."

"OK, Amber. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Don't forget," she called loudly. There was a lot of shuffling as the phone was passed back over to Mark. I lay back on the bed, phone pressed tightly to my ear as I waited to hear his voice again.

The first thing I heard was him chuckle. "There you go, that's how you handle Glen."

"Yell at him?" I was highly dubious about how sensible an idea that would be.

"No, steal his candy."

A reluctant laugh was forced from my throat. "Hey, I'm not suicidal."

Mark gave a full out laugh at that before quietening again. "It's real quiet without you here, darlin'."

I grimaced. "I would say it's quiet here but…"

"He'll be fine, baby girl. Just give him some time."

I sighed, suddenly feeling every one of the miles that separated me from him. "I miss you."

"I miss you too. We both do. Never seen her take to anyone like she has you." He sounded surprised by the fact. Hell, I was surprised by the way Amber and I seemed to have taken to each other. "Bed's going to be mighty cold tonight."

I tried to inject some humour into the conversation before it all started getting to me. "Say goodnight to the boys for me."

He laughed. "Oh I will, darlin', don't you worry."

The shower switched off and I sat up quickly. "Sounds like he's coming back out so I'm going to draw battle lines."

Mark sighed. "Call me after the show?"

"Yeah, I will."

"Talk to you then, darlin'."

I struggled to hold back the emotion I was feeling. Breaking down wouldn't do any good at all. "Love you. Bye."

"Love ya," he replied before hanging up. I dropped the phone and lay back on the bed once more, arms folded over my face. I heard Glen come out of the bathroom but didn't move, hiding away from what was to come for just a few more precious seconds.

"I'd say something but I know you'll tattle again."

"Drop it, Glen," I muttered, still hiding behind my arms.

"Hey, it's not my fault you have to get Mark to fight your battles for you."

That really got me riled up. Partly because it was true. Where had the old strong Jade gone? She'd been missing since the drinking episode and maybe, just maybe, it was time for her to finally come back. I dropped my arms and sat up, glaring at him. "Right. One chance to say whatever you want to say without it going any further. Hit me with it."

"Right," he echoed me with a chuckle, dropping his towel on his bed. "You weren't on the phone five minutes before you tattled."

"We're not at school, Glen." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Really? Wouldn't have thought it," he replied sarcastically.

"Just get it over with," I snapped.

"Who the fuck gave you the right to do that to him?"

Jaw tightly clenched I looked away from him. "I had no right.

"Yet you did it anyway. And with one of his work colleagues! Mark's stupider than I ever thought he could get."

"Jeez, don't hold back," I snorted. "Mark is a big boy and can make his own decisions."

"I wasn't planning on holding back. And this is one of the worst damn decisions he's ever made," he spat.

I turned to finally look at him. "You know, I'm pretty tempted to agree with you sometimes."

"Do you know how hard it was to pick him up after Sara?" I shook my head. The worst of that had been well and truly over before I had arrived on the scene. "Yeah well, I was damn worried I'd have to do it all over again when he called me damn near crying over you." I glanced back up at him sharply, hocked by what he was saying. "Yeah, that's right," he confirmed, seeing the expression on my face.

My gaze dropped back down to my hands in my lap. "He didn't want to tell me any of the stuff I said to him. I made him, as much as I could."

"I can't say I fucking blame him," he shot out angrily. "You destroyed him, Jade. Gutted him from the inside out and then to top it all off you cheated on him. Now, I'm gonna say this one last thing and then it's done with." He stepped up to stand right in front of me, staring down and trying to intimidate me. "You don't deserve him and I swear to God, if you hurt him anything near to that again, you'll have me to answer to."

Tilting my head back I looked up and met his eyes. "Get in the queue."

"I've got nothing left to say on the matter," he stated.

I have no idea why the next thing to come out of my mouth even occurred to me, but it was out before I had even thought about it. "Better watch your candy," I muttered.

"Excuse me?" His eyebrows, or more to the point, where they should have been, raised quickly.

I shook my head. "Doesn't matter. Just something Amber said to me on the phone."

"Thought you said something about my candy," he grumbled. "I was getting ready to throw you out of the window."

The corners of my mouth twitched at the change in his demeanour. "Amber guessed you were mad at me and thought I'd stolen your candy."

Glen tried hard not to laugh. "The kid knows me well."

I shrugged. "When it wasn't that she knew I'd been really bad."

"Stealing my candy is the equivalent of sleeping with my wife." He winced and cursed himself. "Sorry."

Strangely it was that slip of the tongue that improved my mood. Suddenly I was the one handling the situation well and Glen was the one that felt awkward and unsure of what to say. That fact made me feel much better and I found myself wanting to put him at his ease. "Think the candy would be more to my taste," I replied, raising an eyebrow while trying desperately not to smile.

He relaxed and let out a chuckle. "Yeah well, either keep your hands off or sleep with one eye open."

I rolled my eyes and sighed dismissively. "Please, I sleep with the deadman. You don't scare me." I chanced a small grin.

"When it comes to my munchies, Mark has nothing on me."

I held up both my hands in supplication. "OK, I swear your munchies are safe."

He gave me a lopsided grin. "Good." My good mood quickly evaporated though and I sighed. "What's wrong with you?" he grunted.

"Just thinking," I replied.

"Care to share?"

Sighing once more, I turned to face him. "I'm a long way from Texas."

"No shit," came the sarcastic reply.

I ignored it. "That was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do." It was true. It had been surprisingly hard to leave Amber, even after such a short time of knowing her. Somehow that little girl had got under my skin. What was even stranger was that I didn't seem to mind. Leaving Mark… that had been a whole different matter. That had been damn near impossible. Until the plane had actually been in the air I had been forced to fight the impulse to just get out of my seat and walk off the plane, calling him to come pick me up and damn everything else.

Glen leant forward on his knees and sighed. "I'm warning you now, it doesn't get any easier. I have to leave my wife and kids every week."

I didn't want to talk to him about Mark. We had, after all, only just finished a fairly heated conversation about what I had put Mark through, so I chose to focus on the other element of it. "I've only known the kid a week."

"She's an addictive kid," he shrugged.

I nodded my agreement and laughed. "She sure is. And I hate kids."

Glen laughed back at me. "Nah, you don't. You just think you do. But when you see a kid looking up at you and they want you to help them, or it's your own kid… it's completely different."

I held up both my hands again. "Whoa!" I exclaimed. "Steady there, Glen. My own kid?"

He glanced up at me. "I think if Mark has his way it'll happen one day."

"Not something we've talked about at any length." I shrugged, staring off to the side. "I have views."

Glen chuckled. "He'll try to change them."

I shook my head quickly. "He'd have to do more than that."

It was Glen's turn to shake his head. "He'll change your mind. You'll be living full time at his place in no time."

I cleared my throat roughly. "Take more than that to get me to have a kid."

"Mark my words, couple of years down the line you'll have a little one of your own."

I finally voiced what I thought would be the final end to the discussion. "He'd have to marry me first." Glen just looked at me and grinned before heading over to dig in his bag. "Glen?" I prompted, nettled by his reaction.

"Yeah?" he answered innocently.

"What was that supposed to mean?"

"What did what mean?" He seemed to be determined to deny that he had done anything worthy of comment.

"That look and grin," I prompted.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he replied innocently, still grinning.

I tried to call his bluff. "You can tell me or buy me food."

"Room service alright?" he enquired.

"Or both…" I continued, realising my idea had not worked.

"Nope. You've already stated the deal and I chose food."

"OK, room service is fine." I gave in with as much grace as I could muster.

Glen chucked the menu at me. "You can order though."

I looked down the list and then back at him. "Guess you'll just have the whole thing?" He grinned massively. "Thought so," I chuckled. "I've seen you eat."

"Get to it, missy," he bellowed. "I'm wasting away!"


	32. Chapter 32

After Glen and I had eaten, it was time for me to get back to normal and pick up the threads of my professional life again. The difficulties that I had gone through initially with Glen at least had the effect of taking my mind off of that for a while although I was still a little apprehensive as we approached the arena. As it turned out, I didn't really need to have worried. The family emergency line that Mark had given the company seemed to have worked, and the colleagues that I saw on arrival just asked if everything had been sorted and then dropped the subject completely. There was no awkwardness to deal with. At least, not at first.

After checking in with the office and catching up with the paperwork for where the tour was right then, I decided to head over and get a coffee. While walking down the corridor, I saw a familiar broad back in front of me and stopped, feeling incredibly awkward. It looked as if he had seen me and was trying to disappear before I noticed him.

"Oh… hi," I said quietly, not really sure how to talk to him but not wanting to ignore him.

Dave turned to face me. "Hey," he replied quietly.

I bit my lip nervously. "You OK?"

He glanced at the floor and back up at me. "Yeah, not too bad. You?"

Nodding slowly, I took a couple of steps towards him. "I'm doing pretty good. Feels a bit strange to be back though."

Dave nodded. "I bet, but I'm sure Tara's glad to be sharing with you again."

I cleared my throat before replying. That fact still rankled a little. "I'm not actually sharing with Tara." Dave raised an eyebrow at me questioningly. "I'm, er, rooming with Glen," I explained, unable to refrain from rolling my eyes.

"Mark's orders, I suppose?" I nodded slowly. Dave did the same and looked around, obviously feeling uneasy. "Seems to think I need guarding," I commented, managing to keep the bitter edge from my voice.

"Can't really blame him," Dave answered shortly. I winced slightly and didn't reply. He sighed suddenly. "Why is this so uncomfortable?"

Staring at the floor, I replied. "Because of all the shit I put you through." He didn't speak, just rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. "And I really wish it wasn't," I continued. That was most definitely the truth. At that point I would have given anything to have gone back to the easy friendship Dave and I had enjoyed in the past.

Dave looked at me once more and seemed to come to a decision. "Do you want to go get some dinner or something after the show? Maybe we can talk and try to get past all of this."

"I'm supposed to call Mark after the show," I said hesitantly.

"I'm sure he won't mind you calling half an hour later."

I sighed heavily. "I doubt my mentor would approve either."

"Fine…" Dave said quietly.

"Dave, it's not that I don't want to," I explained.

He shrugged, looking down the corridor away from me. "I guess I'll see you around when you're allowed to or something."

There was no doubt that Dave knew exactly how to push my buttons. There was also no doubt that I had been treading very carefully around Mark, and that I still would have to do so to an extent for the foreseeable future. That being said, I still had a life to lead here on the road, one that meant I needed to deal with Dave on a regular basis. Add to that the fact that he had been my closest friend on the road, and the streak of obstinacy in me that wouldn't allow anyone to dictate anything to me, and a small spark of temper glowed briefly.

I glanced sharply at him, both eyebrows raised high towards my hairline. "Fine. Where?"

Dave thought for a second. "I'll meet you by the exit after the show."

"I'll see you there." He nodded and walked away. I shook my head slightly at the situation and headed back on my way towards catering, feeling in even greater need of that caffeine fix.

The show went past quickly for me that night. Much as I hadn't wanted to leave Texas, it felt great to be back doing the job I loved. I was apprehensive about meeting Dave, anxious because I wanted to make things right between us. I had told him at one point that he was the second most important person in my life in the WWE, my life in the USA. While I definitely did not dwell on the night we had spent together it had made me realise something. I had so often made the comment 'if things had been different' but had never really thought it through. The events of that night had made me. If things had been different I could have loved him. Don't get me wrong, I loved Mark with every fibre of my being and didn't want any other life than one with him, but I couldn't help thinking that if he hadn't been there I could have fallen for Dave and fallen hard. I was dragged from my thoughts by Glen wandering into the office and bumping me with his elbow.

"You ready to go?"

I knew he wasn't going to like my plans and concentrated on finishing sorting out the papers in front of me before filing them away. "Uh, I'll make my own way back."

Glen raised an eyebrow. Well, he raised the spot where there should have been one. "Don't be silly. We're going to the same place. Same room, even," he chuckled.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, but I'm going for dinner first."

"Mmm, food," he commented, smiling. "Sounds good to me."

Finishing with the papers, I turned to face him. "With Dave."

The smiles slipped from his face, being replaced by a frown. "I don't think that's such a good idea."

Shaking my head slightly, I glanced at the floor before looking back up at him. "We have some things we need to talk through." Glen simply narrowed his eyes slightly. I tried not to get annoyed at him. He was only watching out for Mark after all. "Glen, nothing is going to happen. He went through a lot of this shit with me and didn't come out of it too well either."

He shrugged but tension was clear in every line of his body. "Fine, but just make sure Mark knows I tried to stop you."

"Look, I'll tell him what I've done when I ring him if it will make you happy."

"Fine, whatever, I'll see you later." He fished in his pocket and came out with the spare key card to our room.

I took it from him and summoned up a small smile. "I won't be late. It's not going to be fun." He nodded and turned on his heel to leave. "That could have been worse," I muttered to myself as I shut the office up and headed towards the exit. Dave was already there waiting for me, leaning against the wall.

"Hey," I called as I approached him.

Dave glanced up at me and pushed himself up from the wall. "Hey, you ready?"

"Yeah, let's go." I wasn't sure if I was looking forward to doing this or dreading it. I really hoped we could salvage some kind of friendship from this, even though I knew in my heart of hearts that Mark would not be particularly impressed. That thought did make me nervous but, on the other hand, I was my own person and had always been stubborn. If it was possible there was no way I was going to give up on this friendship, and I had to hope that it was possible. Dave suggesting this dinner had to be a good sign. Surely if there was no chance of us coming through it, surely he would never have suggested it. He held the door open for me, showing impeccable manners as always. "Oh the chivalry," I jested with a slight smile.

He gave me a half smile in return and shrugged. "What can I say? Some things never change." Walking over to the car he held that door for me as well before walking around the vehicle and getting in the driver's side.

The drive was mercifully short, to a diner not far from the arena. The atmosphere was distinctly strained in the car. I had no idea at all of how to start the conversation.

"Come on," he said quietly once he had turned off the engine. "This place is great." He got out and I followed him quickly. We went inside and Dave led the way to a booth near the back. Sliding in to the seat, he ordered a couple of drinks and sat back, glancing around from time to time. After looking around the place, I decided to try and open a conversation.

"So… I miss anything while I was away?"

He put on a thoughtful look. Uh, Randy Orton got caught out by a fan who left him tied naked to his bed." I choked slightly at that. "Covered in chocolate sauce," he continued, chuckling.

"Git!" I burst out, grinning from ear to ear.

"What?" he exclaimed.

"Like I'm going to believe that," I replied, shaking my head.

"Come on, you know Randy's reputation. Do you really think it's not true?"

I shook my head once more. "I can't understand why anyone would want to go anywhere near him."

Dave shrugged. "Fan girls have no sense."

I snorted. "Kind of goes with the territory I suppose."

"Except some of us are smart enough to not jump into bed with the first girl that shakes a leg at us," he chuckled.

"Yeah, some of you I suppose," I agreed. "They're a pain in the ass to get rid of." He chuckled once more and I gave him a questioning look. "What?"

"Just remembering Manchester."

"Oh yes…" I sat back in my seat and thought about it. "The waitress from the hotel, wasn't she?"

"Yeah, trust our luck!" he snorted.

"Don't think it could have been much worse."

"She could have been staying at the hotel too," he observed.

I winced at the very idea. "That would not have gone down well. It was strained enough as it was."

"Good times though," he sighed.

"It didn't feel so much like it at the time, but looking back… That's where we became friends." Dave nodded, staring at his drink while I fiddled with my own glass, cursing the awkward silence that had returned to claim us. Luckily it wasn't long before the waitress came over to us.

"What can I get ya, sweetie?" she asked Dave.

Rolling my eyes, I muttered out of the corner of my mouth. "What am I, invisible?"

The waitress completely ignored me and pushed her cleavage up under Dave's nose. "You want the… 'Special'?"

Dave glanced over at me, clearly trying not to laugh. I muttered to him once more. "Are we back in Manchester?"

Clearing his throat to get rid of the laughter, Dave sat up in his seat and looked at me again. "Burger and fries, Jade?"

"Sure, sounds good."

Looking back to the waitress he put in our order for two burgers, and asked for a refill on the drinks. The waitress leaned right over the table to gather the glasses and turned to walk away, swaying her hips excessively as she did so. As soon as she was out of earshot Dave burst out laughing.

"Fuck's sake!" I burst out. "It's so pathetic!"

"Oh God!" he snorted, nowhere near getting the laughter under control.

"Yeah, laugh it up there," I smiled. "She comes back, you're on your own."

The laughter stopped instantly and he gazed at me steadily. "You wouldn't leave me alone with that, would you?"

"Damn right if you keep it up. I've told you that before."

"That would be beyond evil," he stated.

I shrugged. "Never claimed to be nice." He grumbled and slunk down into his seat slightly. I watched him out of the corner of my eye and grinned. "Need protecting from the scary lady?" Suddenly a huge grin came over his face and he leant over, writing something on a napkin. When I sat up to try and read it he snatched it away and folded it up.

"What are you up to?" I asked suspiciously.

"Nothing," he said with an innocent smile. I knew full well that I was in trouble. That smile meant all kinds of trouble, and never for Dave.

"Like I'm going to trust that look," I growled. "I've seen it before."

At that point the waitress returned with our order. "Here you go, darlin'." Once again she spoke only to Dave, not even seeming to notice that I existed.

"Thank you," he glanced at her nametag, "Chloe." Slipping her the folded up napkin, he winked at her. She opened it and glanced at what was written there, going all fan girly suddenly; and walking off with a big smile. Instantly everything became clear.

Leaning over towards him slightly, I spoke quietly. "And just whose number did you give her?"

He turned to me with a wide grin. "Yours."

I blinked at him a few times. "That's cruel."

"Never said I was nice, honey," he replied, taking a sip of his drink.

"Guess you didn't," I laughed. "Bit like old times, huh?"

He smiled softly. "Yeah."

I was reluctant to end the moment, but it needed to be done. "I suppose we need to talk about things though."

Sighing, he looked down at his food. "Yeah, we do."

"Care to start us off?" I asked without much hope. As I had expected he gave me a look the clearly said 'Yeah, right' and didn't speak. I took a deep breath. "There's not much I can say that I haven't said before. I guess the thing is if they sound any different now."

He shifted a little uncomfortably before he replied. "I didn't really know what I expected us to say. I just wanted to get past that uncomfortable feeling."

I raised an eyebrow. "I think we've managed that."

He laughed. "Yeah, I think we have Chloe to thank for that."

Taking a mouthful of my drink, I thought about what he had just done. "I hope I'm in a good mood when she calls, for her sake." Dave choked on a fry as he laughed. "Hey!" I exclaimed. "No dropping dead until you've paid the bill."

"Oh, I feel so loved!" He took a long drink to wash the fry down.

Shrugging, I tucked in to my own food. "I'm broke. I have to pay the swear jar." He made an enquiring noise. "Yep, we have a swear jar and it's costing me a damn fortune."

"You've just worked up two payments there," he observed.

"Different zip code," I laughed.

"Gotta love that zip code rule," he chuckled.

"It's saving me money at least."

"You know, we're in a different zip code too." He bumped me with his shoulder and grinned.

I couldn't help but smile back, feeling our old easy friendship beginning to return. "Can it, Batista." He laughed, throwing another fry in to his mouth. "I've missed this," I said quietly.

He smiled in return. "Me too."

"It's been a while."

"Yeah," he agreed. "It has."

"Better duck for cover," I observed. "I think Chloe's coming back."

"Bathroom break, I think." He started to get to his feet.

I put a hand on his arm, stopping him. "No way. You started it."

Sinking slowly back in to his seat he grimaced. "Bitch."

"You know it."

"Anything else I can get you, sweetie?" Chloe asked him as she reached us.

I tried hard to keep a straight face. "Yeah, anything else… sweetie?"

Dave was having to fight to keep his face straight too. "Uh, how about the check?"

"No problem sugar." She sashayed away again. By that point I was having to bite my lip to keep from laughing, and Dave shoved the rest of his burger in his mouth, attempting to do the same. Chloe returned quickly with the check. "Here you go, sweetie. I get off in an hour. I'll give you a call and maybe we can meet up and have a little fun."

Dave grinned. "Sounds great to me, honey."

"I think I'm going to wait by the car." I tried to get to my feet and make a break for it before I simply couldn't hold in the laughter anymore. Dave grabbed my arm and yanked me back down into my seat. "Bastard," I muttered at him.

"I sure can't wait to see just what an animal you are," Chloe purred.

Dave grabbed his wallet out and put a few bills on the table, getting to his feet. "Well, you give me that call and you'll find out exactly how animalistic I can be."

I shook my head, my ribs aching from the strain. Dave grabbed my arm once more and practically ran out of the diner, bursting out laughing the second the door closed behind us. I was laughing so hard within a couple of strides that I nearly fell over.

"Oh God!" he panted. "That's some phone call you're going to get later."

"Thanks a bunch, pal!" I gasped, shoving at his arm. He was still laughing as he got in to the drivers seat. I flopped down in to the passenger seat next to him, trying to get my breath back.

Glancing up at the doorway, his eyes went side. "Oh shit, she's coming after us!"

"What the fuck are you waiting for then?" He started the car and floored the accelerator out of the parking lot. "Ah man, that was almost scary," I said, still chuckling.

Dave glanced over at me. "Almost?"

"OK, bloody terrifying." I burst out laughing all over again, echoed by Dave as he navigated his way through the traffic.

"Oh, I wish I could be a fly on the wall when you get that call later."

"That'll be Glen instead." Now we were heading back he entered my thoughts for the first time.

"Don't think we missed curfew do you?" he asked, still grinning.

"Might be getting close," I replied, rolling my eyes and laughing.

"Better get a move on or the big red machine will be rolling over ya!" he laughed, still hyped up from the diner episode.

"Yeah, and I bet he just can't wait for me to do something he can give me a little grief over," I said, a little bitterly.

The humour faded a little from Dave's face as he looked over at me. "It can't be that bad, surely?"

I shook my head, acknowledging that he was right. "No, that's not fair. He said his piece and that's been it so far."

"Yeah, Glen's always been one to just get it over with and then that's it. Unless you piss him off again that is," he ended with a chuckle.

"He knows everything, Dave."

Shifting his hands on the steering wheel, he sighed. "Yeah, I know."

Cocking my head to the side I turned to face him. "You been on the receiving end?"

Looking back at me, he offered a slight grin. "Didn't you see the black eye I had when I got back in the ring?" I nodded slowly, not exactly surprised. Dave slowed and pulled in to the hotel parking lot. "Come on, I'll walk you to your room." As we reached the hotel door, he pulled it open and swept down in a deep bow. "M'lady."

I glanced around quickly. "A lady? Where?"

"You know, if you were wearing a skirt I'd be able to see right up it from here," he mused, looking up at me.

"Pervert," I laughed.

He stood up and let the door close. "You know it. Hey, you know if Glen gets too much you can retreat with me a bit. I promise to keep my hands to myself."

A slight smile crossed my face. "I'll bear it in mind." I knew that I would never do it, but the mere fact of him suggesting it showed that things were on the way to being right between us and that meant an awful lot to me.

Smiling, Dave extended an arm and guided me in the direction of my room. "Well," he said when we reached it, "This is you. Catch you tomorrow."

"G'night Dave," I said, turning towards the door.

"Oi!" he exclaimed. I turned back to him, to see him standing there with his arms open. "Don't think you're going anywhere without giving me a little action, do ya?"

I laughed as I gave him a huge hug. "Still don't give up, do you?"

There was a click as the door opened behind us, and then Glen grunted. "Sorry, heard voices."

Dave let me go and stepped back. "Relax, big man. I was just delivering her home safely and giving her a hug."

Taking a step towards the open door, I glanced back at him.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Dave."

"Later, honey." He turned and walked off towards his own room.

"Mark called," Glen said as he turned and walked back into our room. "About an hour ago."

I followed along behind him. "Yeah? I was just going to call him. I didn't realise we'd been gone that long though. Did you tell him where I'd gone?"

"No," he replied shortly.

"What did you tell him?"

"Just said you weren't here right now but I'd get you to call him back, got an earful from him, you know." He gave me a slight smile.

"Yeah, I can imagine." I picked up the phone and started dialling. "I'll do it now."

It sounded as if he had almost been sitting on top of the phone as it was picked up as soon as it started to ring. "Jade?"

"Hi," I said in a cheerful voice.

"Where you been, darlin'? I've been worried about you."

"I just went to get some dinner," I replied calmly.

"Oh yeah? Who with?" I had hoped he wouldn't ask the question but realised I should have known better.

Taking a deep breath I answered him. "Dave." Mark went quiet. "We just needed to talk things through. I hurt him too, Mark."

"I'd hurt him too if I could," he growled.

I closed my eyes briefly. "Please don't do this. We just went to get some food and talked."

"Fine, but I'll be having words with him when I get back."

I couldn't stop myself being a little annoyed at the way he was trying to control my life, even though I knew deep down inside that I deserved it. "Are you going to ban him from having anything to do with me?"

Mark sighed heavily. "As much as I'd like to of course I'm not. Me and him just got a few things of our own to sort out, baby girl."

"You're not going to get into a fight again are you?" I asked suspiciously.

"Who knows?" he replied evasively.

"Mark, please don't."

"Jade, it needs to be done," he stated patiently.

"For your peace of mind?" He made an assenting noise in his throat. I glanced over at Glen. "Nothing I can say to stop it, is there?"

It was Glen that answered my question. "One way or another, he'll get alone with Dave. Best to just go with it." He then mouthed 'Tell him I tried to stop you!'

Nodding reluctantly at him, I spoke to Mark once more. "OK, but I don't have to like it."

"I'm not asking you to like it, baby girl. Just to understand."

"I do, I suppose." Out of the corner of my eye I saw Glen jump to his feet mouthing furiously and gesturing. "Glen didn't like me going. Tried to stop me."

Glen grinned and subsided back into his seat. "Thank you," he muttered.

"Oh really?" Mark asked. "He's doing his job then?"

I snorted quietly. "Oh yeah, definitely doing his job."

"I heard you threatened his candy," Mark chuckled.

I started to laugh. "Yeah, for about five seconds then he threatened to throw me out the window. The candy is now very, very safe."

"Glad to hear you're getting along after earlier. He didn't give you any shit, did he?" Mark's voice had become more comfortable, the awkward subject having been put to bed for the moment.

"No more than I allowed. I took your advice," I admitted.

"Wow," he said in mock surprise. "First time for everything."

"Shut it, deadman," I shot back.

"Not like you can make me. You're thousands of miles away." He sighed as he finished speaking.

"Yep. And it sucks," I said bitterly.

"Bed's real cold without you, darlin'. Well, it would be if Amber hadn't invaded it." He chuckled deep in his chest. "She misses you that much she had to jump in with me."

I settled myself on my bed, legs tucked up underneath me. "Still got one of your girls then."

"Would've preferred both of them."

I laughed. "I'd prefer it if she didn't do that when I was there."

I could virtually hear the smile in his voice. "I can guarantee she'll do it the first night you're back. She'll attach herself to ya, darlin'."

"The first night!" I yelped in horror.

Mark outright laughed. "You wanna tell her she can't cos you want to bone her daddy?"

"Yeah, think I might skip that conversation. Still be true though."

"Just remember baby girl, she'll go to bed before us," he said in a low voice.

"Just leaves the rest of the house then," I mused.

"Exactly," he growled.

"It's a big house…" I trailed off, thinking about it.

Mark rattled his tongue bar along his teeth. "Plenty of places to reacquaint ourselves, darlin'."

I shivered violently. "That's not fair." Glen looked up at me over the top of a comic book he was reading and raised an eyebrow. I flapped a hand at him, sticking my tongue out at him when he chuckled. "Feels like a long time away."

"I forget that you guys don't get as much time off as the wrestlers. Sinkin' in now though, darlin'."

I snorted. "No, we're not pampered like you lot."

"Hey! I'm not pampered!" he exclaimed indignantly.

"When it comes to time off you are."

"Yeah, but I've always stuck around on the road and spent it with you." It was true, and I knew that I had been very lucky. I had no idea how the wrestling wives coped with it – hardly ever seeing their husbands.

"I know and I'm feeling the difference. When I started this job I went 4 months without getting home for more than a day or two." I ground to a halt, not wanting to dwell on that fact.

"Walking around the arena looking for me, huh? I did exactly the same thing when you were gone, baby girl. I think I drove Glen crazy," he chuckled. "Now it's your turn."

I glanced over at Glen, obliviously reading his book once more. "I doubt it'll take me long."

Mark laughed hard. "I guess it's a good thing he's got no hair or you'd have him pulling it out by tomorrow."

I chuckled in return. "I was thinking more along the lines of an hour or so."

"I'd better let you go and get some sleep, baby girl."

I agreed reluctantly. "Yeah, it's a busy day tomorrow."

"Oh uh by the way, now don't get mad at her but Amber kinda slipped something into your bag as a joke. I recommend you send Glen in."

"She what!" I exclaimed, knowing full well that it could only be one thing for Mark to have warned me about it like that.

"Calm down, baby girl. She doesn't understand how scared you are of 'em, and I've grounded her. She's gonna have a real big apology for you tomorrow."

"You grounded her?" I asked quietly. "She didn't understand, she meant it as a joke."

"You think I should un-ground her?"

"I'll have to explain it to her. I'm not getting involved though." When all was said and done, this was his daughter and I was just the girlfriend. It was up to Mark to decide how to discipline his own child.

Mark quickly blew that idea out of the water. "It's your call, baby girl. The doll's in your bag, not mine."

"She's your kid," I insisted.

What he said next completely blew me away. "Yeah, but I'd like to think you could be some kind of parental figure to her. And what she did was done to you, darlin'."

Spluttering uselessly for a few seconds, I had to force my mouth to work coherently. "Parental figure? To Amber?" Glen glanced up, a shocked expression on his face as he worked out what I had said.

Mark chuckled. "She's already asked me if you're going to be her new mommy."

"She asked you what?" I felt totally breathless.

"When you left earlier, she wanted to know if you were going to be her new mom," he stated again.

"Fucking hell," I muttered. "That's a hell of a thought for her to have."

"She's got real close to you this past week. Besides my Mom you're the only woman who thinks about her. I talked to her about it. Told her it was an awful big thing to ask and a big thing for you to take on."

"Ain't that the truth," I mused. "Look," I went on, trying desperately to get back onto more solid ground with the conversation, "un-ground her and I'll talk to her tomorrow. I'm going to get some sleep."

"Okay, darlin'." He lowered his voice. "Wish you were sleepin' by my side."

"Me too. Love you."

"Love ya, baby girl. Talk to you tomorrow." He hung up.

"Holy shit," I muttered as I dropped the phone beside me. "Oh, Glen? I need you to do me a favour."

In hindsight I maybe should have explained to Glen that I was scared of dolls, not just asked him to get the doll out of my bag. When he swung round with it in his hand and held it out towards me, I squeaked and ran backwards into the wall, shouting at him to get it out of there. He gave it to a frankly terrified looking maid who had the misfortune to be in the hallway clearing something up when he opened the door. How pale I must have looked became clear when he looked at me, strode over to his bag and tossed me a bar of chocolate.

"You look like you need this more than I do," he grinned. I caught the candy and just stared at it. "If you hate them, why was it in your bag?" he asked curiously.

"Amber put it there as a joke. Not funny, Glen," I protested when he chuckled. "I don't think she realises how bad it is. On top of that, she asked Mark…" I trailed off, shaking my head.

Glen leant forward and took hold of my hand. "What she ask, honey?"

I looked up at him. "She asked if I was going to be her new mommy."

Glen whistled. "Whoa…"

"Yeah, whoa," I agreed. "And he tells me he wants me to be a parental figure to her."

"Oh wow," he muttered. "Tough break."

"No shit. I met her a week ago, and with everything that's happened…"

Glen interrupted me. "You really must be the woman Mark makes you out to be then." I glanced over at him questioningly, but he just smiled.

"What's he said?" I asked, unable to hold my curiosity in any longer.

Glen's grin widened. "That would be telling."

"It's much easier to get information out of Amber," I huffed before becoming thoughtful once more. "She's a great kid, but that's just… wow. I had a hard time leaving though."

"Did you know my kids aren't actually my kids?" I glanced up at Glen quickly, having had no idea of that fact. "It's hard. I'm not gonna lie to you. You've just got to take it as it comes and see how it goes. Don't try to think on it too much and just go with it."

I thought about his words and nodded slowly, seeing the sense in what he was saying. "Me and Mark, we're a long way off that kind of situation though. It's been such a short time since…" I trailed off into silence.

Glen shook his head. "And doesn't that tell you how much he loves you? That he's getting past everything like it's nothing?"

Sighing I stared at the bar of chocolate still sitting in my hand. "I'm just so scared I'm going to mess up again somehow."

"If you keep thinking like that, you will," he snorted. "Listen, is Amber really such a tough obstacle?"

"She's not an obstacle," I protested. "I adore her, and that's something I never thought I'd say about a kid other than my niece and nephew."

"Then what's the problem?" he asked, spreading his arms out wide.

"It's just the word I guess. The responsibility that goes with it."

"Yeah, but what about the love and pride that goes with it?"

"I'm not sure I've reached that point yet," I said quietly.

Glen grinned. "Yeah, yet."

"He said she's not going to ask me about it, so that's not so bad."

Glen chuckled deep in his chest. "If I know Amber like I do, she ain't going to listen to him a whole lot."

I dropped my head, smiling softly. "She is her father's daughter, that's for sure. We have a great time together too."

"You've really fallen in love with her ain't ya?" He smiled over at me.

"I think I have," I answered, faintly surprised at my reaction. "I'm in it up to my neck, aren't I?"

"No you're not. When the time comes, you'll know what to do."

I grinned suddenly. "Well, at least I'm safe while I'm on the road." Glen merely chuckled once more. "That didn't sound convincing, Glen."

Once again he merely smiled, although it soon faded. "I'm sorry to change subjects, and I know I said I'd drop it, but I need to ask you one thing.

"OK, shoot," I sighed, wondering what it was now.

"I don't need to worry about you and Batista do I?"

Offering him a small smile, I replied "Not at all."

He answered me with a big smile. "Good. I won't feel so bad about letting you guys hang out then."

I burst out laughing. "But you tried to stop me, right?"

Glen grinned widely. "Of course…"


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N - I know it has been months since I updated this story and I can do no more than apologise for that fact. My life seems to have settled down again at the moment and my partner in crime is helping me work on finishing the tale off. Sadly it seems as if the end is in sight for Traveller - well, I'm torn between sadness at it being over and happiness at having the tale told.**

**I'm back to working on both stories much more regularly again now and really hope that there will be no more gaps of that length in the updates. Thanks all for your patience. Jay**

It was a relief to have things sorted out with Glen and, as much as I worried about the potential problems between Mark and Dave, it felt good to have been honest with him. Too many lies had been told during the time I had been taking the drugs and honesty, while stressful, definitely felt like the best policy.

It was late the following afternoon before I got a chance to call home to talk to Amber about her little joke she had played on me. As soon as I knew I had a few minutes clear, I found a quiet corner of the arena and dialled the number.

"Hello?" I couldn't help the grin that automatically came across my face as soon as I heard Mark's voice.

"Hi, it's me."

"Hey babe, how's it goin?" he asked, sounding pleased to hear my voice.

"Not bad. You know how it is here. I've seen it worse but… Helps when those on the signings can haul themselves out of bed on time," I sighed.

Mark chuckled. "Hold on a second, baby girl." His voice faded slightly as he moved the phone away from his mouth. "Get back here little girl. You know who it is." His voice became clearer again as he spoke to me once more. "I think she's a little worried about talkin to ya, darling."

I found myself hating the idea that Amber was nervous about talking to me. "Best hand me over then."

"OK, hold on." His voice quietened slightly as he moved the phone away from his mouth again. "Come on, angel. She ain't gonna bite… Amber, come on!"

There was a quiet shuffling and then Amber spoke very quietly. "Hello?"

"Hey Amber." I kept my voice as even as possible although I was already fighting a smile.

"Hey Jade," she replied, still in that same low voice.

"You know what you did, huh? Do you understand how I am with those things?"

"Yeah, I was bad," she sighed. "And I do know now. Daddy yelled at me and I got grounded."

"You're still grounded?" I asked, remembering that I had spoken to Mark about that the night before. "Hmm, I'll have to talk to your Daddy about that. Those things really scare me you know."

"I didn't mean to upset you, Jade! Honest! I hope you didn't cry!" I could hear her starting to get upset.

"No, I didn't cry," I reassured her. "But Uncle Glen gave me some candy. A whole bar of chocolate!"

"He did?!" she gasped in wonder. "Wow! I'm sorry Jade. I didn't mean to scare you. I promise not to do it again. Make Uncle Glen pinky swear for me!"

I had to smile at that. "I know, sweetheart, and I'm not mad at you. He's not here right now but I'll do it later." I heard the phone rattle as she nodded. "Right, you going to give me back to Daddy now?"

"Do I have to?" she whined. "I like talking to ya, it makes me feel good."

"Yeah, me too," I agreed. "But I need to talk to Daddy. I'll talk to you again soon."

"OK," she sighed. "Bye! Love ya!" I was left mouthing impotently as she dropped the phone and called for Mark.

"Hey darling," he said as he got the phone back to his mouth. "Everythin sorted?"

"Pretty much." I shook myself and tried to maintain an even tone of voice to avoid worrying him. "Amber says you still have her grounded though."

"Shit!" he exclaimed. "I knew I forgot to do something. Amber!" he bellowed. "You're not grounded any more!" Happy yelling could be heard in the background in Texas.

"Guess I'm popular now," I laughed.

"Hey, you're more popular than me!"

"I'm just damn wonderful," I laughed, leaning back against the wall.

"Don't go getting too big for your boots, girlie…" he growled.

I sat back up straight, spluttering just a little. "Did you just call me girlie?"

"Did I stutter?" I could tell he was grinning widely at the verbal sparring.

"That is not a good way to get yours when I come home," I threatened, lowering my voice.

"You won't be able to resist me." There was utter certainty in his voice. What annoyed me more than that was the fact that he was most likely right. "You'll last an hour, tops." He ended the sentence with a short rattle of his tongue bar.

"That's cheating," I complained, trying to hide the slight breathy quality that had crept into my voice at that.

"Didn't you know I was a dirty boy?" he growled. The effect was rather ruined by Amber piping up in the background.

"No you're not, Daddy! You had a shower today."

I laughed so hard I nearly dropped the phone, muttering a curse and catching it, getting it back to my ear to hear Mark groaning.

"Shut up you," he muttered.

"You don't have a hope against the two of us, you know," I observed, getting the giggling under control. "I have to go do work though," I sighed reluctantly.

"Yeah, I guess I should get back to lazin around." He chuckled when I grumbled. "Aw, what's wrong, darling? Jealous that you've gotta work and I don't? Or is the thought that you can't jump me?"

"Both," I replied, smiling when he laughed. "I've found out when I can get a couple of days off."

"Really?" he asked eagerly. "When? Is it soon?"

"Just before you come back," I sighed.

"That long, huh?" he said quietly.

"Yep. Nothing before that and it'll be a lot longer afterwards."

"Didn't think it would be this hard," he sighed. "You've only been gone a day and I miss ya like hell."

"And when you go to Europe, they're sending me on the Australia and New Zealand tour. Karen's pregnant and doesn't want to go that far. We were lucky before." I heard him make a low noise of assent in his throat.

"We'd better go," he said finally and I could tell it was bugging him just as much as it was me. "Love ya, baby girl."

"You too, " I answered, trying to keep the regret out of my voice. "Bye."

Mark said bye as well and hung up. My head dropped back against the wall and I swore quietly. I had always loved my job but right at that point I really didn't want to be there.

It did get easier as time passed and I got back into the rhythm of life on the road. I talked to Amber most afternoons and then would call again after the show if there was one or just after dinner if there wasn't to talk to Mark. Time passed slowly, but it did pass and eventually it was time for my days off and a trip back to Texas. Once again, I found an isolated corner to call, this time knowing that the call wouldn't be welcomed.

The phone seemed to ring forever but Mark finally answered it just as the machine picked it up. "God damn it…" he grumbled and I could just picture him slapping at the buttons. "Hello?"

"Hey, it's me."

The tone of his voice brightened. "Hey darling. How uh… how are you?"

"Not so good actually," I replied, a little hesitant now it had come to be time to tell him what was going on.

I heard him take a deep breath. "Oh really? What's wrong?"

Sighing heavily I turned to face the bustling airport in front of me. "My flight's been cancelled. Trouble with the plane or something."

Mark muttered something under his breath that I couldn't catch before speaking to me again. "Mechanical failure huh?" He didn't sound terribly convinced. I fought to keep my voice level, hating the fact that he felt he couldn't trust me.

"I didn't catch the specifics, but the next one's not until the morning." Sighing once more, I turned back to the phone. "I'm pretty damn pissed off right now."

"Glen around?"

"No, I packed all of them off towards the next show a couple of hours ago. It's just me here, trying to get to Texas."

"Nothin to be done then?" he asked, sounding a little tense.

"I'm too far to drive. All I can do is try to find a route somewhere else. If I can't do that I'll have to find a hotel here for the night and catch the flight tomorrow." I squirmed slightly, frowning at the direction this conversation had taken.

"Don't go stressin yourself out darlin... Get a room, catch the flight tomorrow and call me when you get here. Amber'n I'll pick you up." He sounded more resigned to the fact than anything else/

"I guess that'd be easiest. I'll let you know when I'll be there. Look, I'll talk to you later on. I need to go get sorted out." In the ear away from the phone I heard an announcement being made in the airport.

"Kay darlin...be safe. Amber sends hugs." His voice faded for a moment as he said something away from the phone. "Love you baby girl."

"Yeah, love you too. Bye." Hanging up the phone I grinned to myself and obeyed the boarding call, getting on to my plane to Houston. Mark knew my schedule so well, and could find out any information he wanted from the company even if I hadn't told him so that was the only way I was ever going to be able to surprise him at home. I did feel a bit bad as I settled into my seat at having lied to him but I knew I'd be forgiven once I got to the ranch. Besides, there was something I had been itching to do for some time.

After a smooth flight to Houston with, for once, no need to worry about a hundred and one things that could go wrong, I left the airport and headed to my little apartment. Once I had unlocked the door I stood in the small space and looked around. I hadn't been there on my own since I had been through Mark's version of rehab and it felt very strange to be there at that point. Even though I was surrounded by my belongings I didn't feel like I belonged there. It had never felt much like home with so little time having been spent there. Home for me was a succession of hotel rooms or wherever Mark was.

Allowing myself a small smile at that thought, I changed quickly and grabbed my keys, heading out eagerly to my bike. As I swung a leg over it and started the engine the smile spread to a huge grin. This was what I had missed in those last few weeks.

With great enjoyment and only one detour to get some extra miles in I rode out to Mark's place, revving the engine and popping a wheelie up the last part of the drive. As I took off my helmet I caught sight of Mark out of the corner of my eye, looking out of the window. He disappeared and a few seconds later threw the front door wide open.

"Yeah, mechanical failure my ass," he laughed.

Dragging a hand through my hair I grinned up at him. "I did say I didn't hear the specifics..."

Shaking his head he walked down the steps to meet me. "Missed ya angel... You've got no idea." Wrapping me up in a big hug he kissed me.

I wrapped my arms tightly around him, enjoying the solid feel of him. "I think I might have just a little."

Releasing his hold on me a little he turned his head towards the house. "Amber! Jade's home!"

Perking up I turned back towards my bike, heading for the bag strapped to the back of it. "I've got something for her in my bag."

The door flew open again and Amber emerged, wide-eyed. "Jade!" I heard the sound of running footsteps and then her weight barrelled into my back. "We missed you!"

Stumbling forward with the impact I took a second to regain my balance and turned round to her. "Hey, I missed you too!" Smiling, I held up a little box. "I have something for you."

Amber's eyes moved dreamily to the box in my hand. "Really??"

"Yep," I replied, handing it over. "Go on, open it." I watched Mark's little girl tearing her way into the box with typical five year old relish. Quickly she got it open and took out the necklace that was contained inside.

"Oooh... it's pretty..." She held the pendant up to Mark. "Look daddy!"

"Do you know what it is?" Amber shook her head, holding the pendant up towards the sun in an attempt to see through it. "Remember I told you that amber is a kind of precious stone? That's a piece of amber."

"Cool!" Amber exclaimed, fiddling with the clasp and frowning when she couldn't get it open.

"C'mere sweet pea," Mark said, taking the necklace from her and clasping it around her neck.

Smiling at the scene I turned back towards the house. "Jesus, I'm tired." "With a contented little groan I stretched my back out. "It's been chaos."

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Mark ruffle Amber's hair and stand back to his full height before wrapping his arm around my shoulders. "C'mon inside... Dinner's cookin as we speak. I know you didn't eat on the plane."

I shook my head vehemently. "No way... Never have done."

He chuckled and kissed my hair as we walked up the stairs, then turned back towards Amber who was still stood by my bike. "You comin shorty? Cuz I can eat yours if you're not."

Two sets of green eyes glared at each other for a second. "No way!" Amber burst out suddenly, sprinting past us and slamming the door.

I couldn't help bursting out laughing. "You two are such a double act."

Mark smiled proudly. smiles proudly "Yeah, she always was more like me. I think that's why Sara can't stand her." His smile suddenly darkened.

Sighing, I turned to face him. "But you've got her now. It won't be long until you're retired and here with her permanently. All Sara can do is visit from time to time."

A wry smile crossed his face. "She hasn't even put in for visitation." He shook his head a trifle disbelievingly.

I loosed a soft snort. "Bad as it may sound I think I like the sound of that better."

"Me too." Mark broke into a grin as he turned to me and planted an earth shattering kiss on me. "God I'm glad you're home."

I smiled in return, enjoying the feeling of being close to him. "It feels amazing to be home, even just for a little while. I have to go back to my apartment tomorrow and meet with the landlord, but the rest of my time is totally free."

Mark nodded and kissed me again. "I was thinkin maybe after dinner if Amber doesn't fall asleep on us, the three of us could go get some ice cream or somethin." He smiled. "Take the bikes..."

Grinning widely, I looked up at him. "Sounds good to me. My baby over there has spent far too long standing idle."

"That still ain't a bike..." Chuckling over my spluttered protests he pulled me close, kissing me yet again.

There was a loud bang as Amber flung open the door. "Daddy, I… Ewww!" She made a playful gagging noise at us. "Gross!"

Bursting out laughing again, I turned to her. "What's gross?"

Amber wrinkled up her little nose and planted her hands on her hips. "You guys kiss too much." Sticking out her tongue briefly she turned and stomped back inside.

Looking at Mark I raised an eyebrow. "Is that possible?"

He laughed and shook his head. "Nope… not from my point of view." He leant in to do it again.

Wrapping my arms around him I leant my face in against the side of his neck. "Got nearly a months worth to catch up on to. Right now though…" I ducked my head, blushing a little as my stomach rumbled loudly, protesting at the lack of food most of the day.

Mark's breath puffed against the side of my face as he laughed. "Yeah, you got great timing. I've been makin chilli all day and it should be about done." He smiled down at me as he opened the door and we walked in. "I'm becoming downright domesticated. Amber helped." He grinned down to where his five year old was applying a pretty authentic looking sleeper hold to a teddy bear. "Didn't ya?"

Amber looked up. "I cooked... You were messin it all up." I tried to cover a huge grin with my hand as she gazed up at me seriously. "Daddy doesn't know what he's doing." Giggling she dropped the bear.

Mark coughed to cover a laugh. "Why don't you go get cleaned up huh?" Amber rolled her eyes at me but rose to do as her father told her.

"I get to like that kid more and more," I chuckled.

Mark quirked an eyebrow at me. "Don't you dare encourage her..."

Smirking at him, I shrugged. "I have every intention of it while I'm here." Shaking his head Mark swatted me on the rear before heading towards the kitchen. Yelping slightly, I dropped my bag on the floor and trailed through after him. "Am I going to have any throat lining left after eating this stuff?"

With an evil looking grin he lifted the lid of the pot. "You tell me."

Stupidly I leant close and took a sniff, my eyes widened suddenly. "I'm going to be breathing fire for a month..."

Frowning, he sniffed it himself. "What're you talkin about? Amber said it was too bland."

"Ever eaten English food? Bland is interesting in comparison."

"Just put a bunch of crackers in it or somethin. You'll survive." Bending over he kissed me quickly then moved to the fridge to get the rest of dinner.

Watching him work I hopped up onto an empty bit of the counter top. "I'll go back to see my landlord early, do the paperwork he wants me to sign and then come back. Make the most of my time here."

"Good," Mark replied. "I want you with me for as long as I can have you."

"All I have to do is sign a new tenancy agreement so it should only take about half an hour."

Putting down the dishes he was about to take to the table Mark took hold of my hand in his. "I think I've got a better idea..."

I looked up at him. "Oh?"

Leaning back against the counter Mark looked at me. "Tell your landlord to take a hike and move in here." A minute grin crossed his face as he glanced at me.

Dumbfounded I could only stare at him for a few seconds. Are you serious?"

"Yeah, I think I am." Shaking his head he continued on. "No, I know I am."

"Wow…" I whispered, leaning back against a cupboard door. "I do love being here."

Mark shrugged. "Don't jump on it right now. Think on it til tomorrow if ya want to."

I shook my head quickly. "Oh no, I've made my decision."

Mark's grin widened. "Oh you have have you?" I nodded in reply, smiling myself by that point. Mark pulled me into his chest. "And?"

"I would love to move in here. You can't compare the two places."

Laughing happily, he squeezed the hell out of me. "That's the best news I've heard all year."

Laughing with him I squirmed a bit. "Hey, big guy... easy on the ribs?"

Reluctantly he released me. "Sorry bout that..."

"You'd think I'd be used to it by now," I chuckled. "The size of some of you guys."

Mark made no reply, just dropped a kiss on the top of my head and gave me a slightly more gentle squeeze before calling Amber in to eat.


	34. Chapter 34

Once Amber returned from what looked like having been putting her entire self under the tap, we sat down to eat. I eyed the chilli dubiously as Mark ladled it into a bowl and passed it to me. After a few seconds contemplation I took the plunge and ate a cautious mouthful. Mark watched me as I chewed.

"See?" he said when I didn't react at first.

Suddenly the heat hit. Spluttering I grabbed the glass of milk I had poured myself. "Damn…"

Amber burst out laughing. "You wimp!"

Finally lessening the heat in my throat I mocked a frown at Amber. "Not a wimp. We don't tend to eat such hot stuff where I come from."

"So you're all wimps," she observed, digging nonchalantly into her own meal.

Taken by surprise I burst out laughing. "I've heard the English called many things, but never had them all generalised as wimps before."

Mark dropped into the seat between us and started loading up his own bowl with Tabasco. "Amber, be nice. Jade's not a wimp, she's just not from Texas." He shot a smile over at her.

I lifted up another forkful. "Not even the same continent." Slowly I started to eat again.

Mark watched as my eyes teared up. "You want me to get you somethin else darlin?"

Wiping at my eyes with the heel of my hand I shook my head. "I'd better start getting used to it."

He grinned widely. "That's right… I guess you better."

Snorting I muttered half to myself. "Glen was right."

Mark looked a question at me. "Right about what exactly?"

"He didn't think it would be long before this happened."

"He said that did he?" he chuckled.

Nodding I took another drink of milk. "Yeah, he has a whole bunch of theories."

He choked on his soda. "Like what?"

A little uneasy suddenly I glanced at Amber. "Oh, nothing too exciting..." Not wanting to pursue the subject I concentrated on my food.

Amber looked up mid-chew. "What?"

Mark stifled a giggle. "Sweet pea, don't talk with your mouth full."

Smiling I shook my head. "Nothing Amber."

Amber dropped her spoon into her bowl and tried to fish it out with her fingers before giving up and licking the chilli from them. "Daddy?" Mark glanced over and grimaced at his daughter, fishing the errant spoon out for her. "Daddy!"

"What, angel face?" He smiled as he wiped her face.

"How come Jade doesn't live with us?"

It was my turn to smile at the little girl. "I've had my own place since I moved over here."

Amber pouted just a little bit. "But… I like her, and I get sad when she leaves."

A warm smile spread over my face at the thought that what Mark and I had decided would make his daughter happy. "We may just be able to do something about that."

Mark grinned over at me and squeezed my hand. "Why don't you tell her?"

My own smile widening I turned to Amber. "Well, your daddy has asked me to move in here."

Amber's eyes lit up and she started to bounce in her chair, nearly upending her bowl. "You mean I was right?"

Puzzled, I shifted a little closer to her. "You were right about what?"

Beaming happily she enlightened me. "Daddy wants to keep you. I told him he did but he just turned a funny colour and told me to go play."

Still a little lost I looked from her to Mark and back again. "He... wants to keep me?" Curiously I looked at Mark again.

Amber nodded. "Uh huh." She dug back into her bowl.

Mark chuckled self-consciously. "Not like a pet or anything."

I turned to Amber once more. "And he turned a funny colour?"

"Yep. He turned red."

Settling back into my chair a little I continued questioning the small child. "And why do you think he turned red?"

Losing interest in the conversation she shrugged and shoved her bowl away. "Can I go now? I ate."

Mark smiled over at her lovingly. "Yeah... go on honey and find your helmet. I think we're gonna go for a ride." Amber squealed in excitement and disappeared around the corner at high speed.

Once she was out of earshot I turned to Mark, grinning a little. "So you want to keep me, huh?" He grumbled something vaguely coherent about the loud mouths of children and leant forward over his bowl giving it his full attention. Pushing my own bowl away I became a little more serious. "Hey, if we can't do honesty with all the shit we've been through..."

His huge shoulders slumped slightly. "Yeah... I guess you're right." Sighing, he leant back to look at me. "Yeah, I guess I wouldn't mind havin you around all the time." His eyebrows raised. "Satisfied?"

A slow smile spread over my face once more. "That's probably as enthusiastic as you're going to sound about it, so yes. For now."

Mark grunted. "You know I don't do sunshine and rainbows darlin..."

"I know, and I wouldn't have you any other way." I chuckled to myself. "Oh, Glen is going to take the piss so bad when I get back there."

"Yeah I'll bet he is..." He took his and Amber's bowls to the sink and rinsed them. "You wanna go for that ride baby girl?"

Standing I stretched hard. "Sounds good to me. Get it in before I fall asleep, never mind Amber."

Leaning over he kissed me quickly. "No sleepin on the road." Turning towards the hall he bellowed for his daughter. "Amber, c'mon honey! We gotta go!"

It was a fun trip out. Of course there were gawkers wherever we went but over time I had become used to that and they seemed to be respecting our privacy for once which was certainly very welcome. Then again, Mark did look rather foreboding if you weren't used to him, especially where Amber was concerned. All in all we were out for a couple of hours and it was almost with regret that I saw the house come back into view as I rode along beside Mark slowly, my visor up so I could talk to the pair of them.

Once parked up I dragged my helmet off and glared at Mark. "It is so a real bike!"

Amber grinned teasingly as she slid down off the seat. "Daddy says it's not."

Indignantly I pointed at my bike. "Two wheels, decent sized engine, dial that goes to very fast... looks like a real bike to me..."

Mark glanced down at his Titan. "Huge engine, two wheels, chrome, and..." He glanced at me pointedly. "No plastic..." he grinned.

"Life is too short for polishing chrome," I sniffed.

Mark looked down and took Amber's helmet from her. "That's what kids are for." Grinning even wider he set her helmet on the seat.

"Never had one, therefore I stick to plastic I can hose down."

He lifted Amber into his arms and let her settle in against him. "C'mon, I think someone's tired."

"Not tired..." she muttered dreamily, yawning.

As he took Amber off to put her to bed I wandered into the living room and grabbed the remote, flicking idly through the channels. Shortly after I had sat myself down however Amber came barrelling in and launched herself into my lap.

"Thought you were going to bed?" I laughed, giving her a hug.

Mark followed quickly behind her. "Amber Katharine Calaway..." he growled, but stopped when he saw her curled up on my lap. "What's this about?"

I shrugged slightly. "First I knew was when she landed on me."

"I want Jade to put me to bed..." Amber whined. I glanced up at Mark, bemused.

"Honey c'mon... Jade's tired too." He reached for her but she curled herself further into me.

"NO!"

Startled by the volume I looked down at her. "What's brought this on?"

Mark chuckled as he sat next to us. "I think she missed ya..."

"OK then, I can do the putting to bed thing."

He grinned knowingly. "I'll be here..." Smugly he settled himself in with the remote.

Looking at him sideways for the grin I got to my feet. "Going to say good night then?"

Amber leant her weight over and slid onto Mark. "Love you daddy..." She gave a huge yawn as she hugged him.

"I love you too sweet pea... go on now and get to bed." Rubbing her back he slid her back on over to me. I had to smile at the sight of him with his daughter. It was a world away from what anyone else got to see of him.

Gathering her back up I headed upstairs with her. "Still got to wash and stuff?"

Leaning her head in against my shoulder she shook it briefly. "Nope... I just need a story..."

I paused for a second on the stairs. "Story huh? Do you have a book?"

"Daddy's been readin me the Velveteen Rabbit..."

"Want me to go on with that?" She nodded sleepily as we went into her room and I placed her gently on the bed. "OK then..." The little girl scrambled around the covers until she managed to figure out how to get under them. Once she was settled I picked up the book and started reading. Before long I became aware that she was fidgeting and looked up. "Something wrong?"

"Do you love my daddy?

Thrown completely off my stride I put the book down and took a breath before answering. "Yes I do."

She nodded with five year old stoicism. "Are you gonna be my new mommy?"

Now completely lost I stared wordlessly for a few seconds. "I... uh... how do you mean?"

She shrugged. "Mommy and Daddy lived together and they kissed a lot... If you live with my daddy, you'd be my new mommy."

"It's... uh... not quite as simple as that, Amber."

She frowned slightly. "Yes it is..."

"No it isn't. For a start, your mommy and daddy were married." Uncomfortably I shifted on the bed.

"I don't remember my mommy and daddy being married..."

I sighed quietly. "Well, they were once."

She took a few moments to think it over then smiled. "Then marry my daddy so you can be my new mom."

Taken aback at the simplicity with which she viewed the world I shook my head. "That's not so easy either."

Mark's daughter snuggled down into her covers a bit and yawned. "I'll talk to daddy... don't worry."

"Uh, maybe you'd better leave it with me..."

She shrugged. "You gonna finish the story?" Goggling at her for a second I picked up the book and continued reading. As I finished I caught sight of Mark who had obviously crept into the doorway while my attention had been on the book and was leaning on the doorframe, smiling softly at the picture in front of him. Closing the book I turned to speak to Amber and saw that she had fallen asleep at some point.

Putting the book away I climbed to my feet. "Guess I got carried away." Mark didn't reply, just giving me a knowing smile. "What's that look for?" I asked him as I stepped over to the doorway.

The smile still clearly evident on his face he slid a finger down my cheek. "She really loves you, ya know."

"Oh yeah, she's left me in no doubt about that."

Dropping a soft kiss on me he ushered me forward until he could shut Amber's door. "I think I'm afraid to ask."

My reply started with a soft snort. "I shouldn't think you'd want to know."

Mark looked a question at me. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Your daughter knows what she wants. And she'll come up with any way she can to get it." Despite everything I had to smile a little at her tenacity.

"Yeah...she does..." Stretching hard he yawned.

I looked at him for several long seconds as I tried to decide whether or not to talk to him about what she had said. Finally I couldn't hold it in any longer. "You know what she wants now?"

"Another pony?" he asked with a chuckle.

I shook my head quickly. "Oh no... bigger than that."

"Ah shit..." He rubbed a hand down over his face. "What'd she tell you?"

"She wants a new mommy it would seem." Unable to remain standing where I was I moved and leant against the wall.

Mark gave every appearance of choking on his tongue. "She said that?"

"Well, she asked me if I was going to be her new mommy." I paused as he made a slight noise in his throat. "I told her it wasn't that simple but she didn't agree. Said if I lived with you that made me her new mommy. Telling her that you and her mom were married didn't help much either." At that point I ground to a halt.

"Ah hell..." Mark started chuckling uncontrollably. "She's a smart kid..."

Staring straight ahead I nodded. "She sure is. Made it sound so simple when she told me I should just marry you..."

His laughter grew even harder. "She told you that huh?" He shook his head in disbelief. "Damn..."

A reluctant smile spread over my face. "Yep, I should marry you and then I could be her new mommy. Said I wasn't to worry cos she'd talk to you."

He finally seemed to sense my growing disquiet as he stopped laughing and pulled me against his chest. "One thing at a time baby girl." He chuckled again. "Who knows, you might hate me after a week."

Sighing, I leant my forehead against him. "Oh, I doubt it. She just threw me, coming out with it like that."

"You know what they say right? 'From the mouths of babes...'."

I tipped my head back to look up at him. "Meaning?"

He shrugged. "Don't know...we'll see I guess." Kissing me once more he turned and headed for the bedroom. My mind still going over the conversation I remained leaning against the wall for several more long seconds before trailing after him.

"I might just grab a shower."

He looked up from where he was untying his boot. "Okay…" He grinned suddenly. "Can I watch?"

Laughing at the expression on his face I shook my head. "Can I deny you anything?"

Kicking off the boots at last he stood and strode across the room to me. "Nope." Bending me nearly in half he dropped me backwards and kissed me.

Grinning back up at him I sighed. "This is a lot of fun but I have an appointment with some hot water and soap."

Grunting unhappily he set me back upright on my feet again. "Yeah yeah..." Walking towards the bed he yanked his shirt off. "You want a beer?"

"Sounds great," I replied, starting to drag my clothes off. "So… not watching then?" I sniggered.

He yawned. "Wanna know the truth? I think I'm too tired to follow through." He shook his head with a chuckle. "God I'm gettin old..."

I smiled softly over at him. "No you're not. To be honest I just want to shower and crash myself."

Stiffly he walked back over to me and kissed me again. "Tomorrow then... you're all mine." With a quick grin he headed for the door muttering about his hip.

Concerned I frowned after him then went for my shower, emerging a short while later wrapped in a towel and rubbing my hair briskly with another one. Surprisingly there was no sign of Mark in the bedroom so I stole one of his shirts and pulled it on to go look for him. I found him sprawled out asleep on the couch in front of Sportscenter, a beer clutched in each hand.

Kneeling on the floor I picked the beers carefully out of his hands and shook him gently. "Hey, that would be much more comfortable in a bed."

He cracked open an eye slowly. "Hey beautiful..." he mumbled before rolling over.

"Come on. Bed... sleep..."

"Mmmm...was sleepin..."

I chuckled quietly. "Well come do it in bed."

His eyes popped wide open suddenly. "Hi..." he said before yawning widely. "How long you been sittin there?"

"Just a couple of minutes."

Stretching he hoisted himself upright. "Sorry, guess I nodded off..." he said as he rubbed at his eyes.

"More tired than you thought huh?"

Mark nodded. "Guess so. Ready for bed?" He lifted himself from the couch.

Nodding, I scrambled up from my kneeling position. "Certainly am."

Rolling his neck slightly he suddenly scooped me up off my feet and held me cradled in his arms. "Then to bed we go..."

With a contented sigh I settled in against him. "Who needs sunshine and rainbows?"

"Obviously not you," he chuckled as he headed up the stairs.

I laughed. "No, I'll settle for a grumpy old Texan."

Gasping, he feinted dropping me, making me squeak and cling on. "I thought you said I wasn't old?"

"Figure of speech..."

"Uh huh..." He smiled at me as he manoeuvred us into the bedroom and dropped me unceremoniously on the bed. "Scoot over..."

Rolling my eyes I scooted. "And they say that chivalry is dead..."

Mark slid out of his jeans and climbed in beside me. "Everywhere but Texas baby girl..." Leaning over he clicked off the light. Sighing contentedly I settled down to sleep, smiling to myself in the dark when I felt him curl up behind me. "Love you," he sighed dreamily.

"Love you too," I replied, snuggling back into him.


	35. Chapter 35

I was woken the next morning by an insistent poking on my forehead and a very quiet voice whispering. "Jade?"

Jerking I looked up and saw Amber hovering over me. "Huh?"

"Jade? Are you sleeping?"

Sleepily I blinked up at her. "Not now, no."

The little girl leaned closer. "The horses need feeding."

Wiping at my eyes with the heels of my hands I glanced at my watch, seeing it was way earlier than I had planned on waking up. "They do?"

She nodded. "Uh huh... Daddy won't get up."

Cautiously I pushed myself up to sit and looked over to see Mark still clearly sleeping. "Daddy's very tired."

"He told me to go back to bed." She frowned a little. "But I can hear them from my room and they're hungry."

Realising that she wasn't going to let me go back to sleep I pushed the covers away a bit. "Well, we can't have that, can we?" Amber shook her head furiously and pattered off out of the door, leaving me to drag myself out of the very comfortable bed next to Mark and get myself dressed before going to find her. She was standing by the back door bouncing from foot to foot in her little cowboy boots and looked at me impatiently as I tied my hair back haphazardly and yawned loudly. "OK then, let's go feed these beasts." Having to use a huge amount of effort she pulled the door open and shot off across the yard towards the barn while I followed along behind a little slower, savouring the much loved smell of horse as I got closer. I had known that the horses were here and had seen them from a distance but somehow or other I had never got round to coming out and meeting them up close when I had been here. There had been so many other more important things to think about.

Lost in my thoughts as I was my pace was far too slow for Amber who poked her head back out of the door to look for me. "C'mon JADE!!!" Chuckling and protesting that I was there already I went in to see Amber dragging a stool over to a pen and waving her hands until the occupant came over to be petted. "This is my horse... Rusty." She grinned wildly at me as I came over to say hi.

"Hey Rusty..." I extended a hand to scratch his neck, smiling as he whinnied happily. "I used to have horses at home, you know."

Amber looked up wide eyed. "You did? What were their names?"

"I had a thoroughbred called Joe and a pinto, a black and white called Max." Smiling she climbed down and dragged the stool over to another stable and repeated the waving at the horse contained in that one, leaving me to follow behind once more. "And who might this be?"

"This is Daddy's horse..." She petted him on the muzzle. "His name is Justice."

"Hi there handsome..." As Justice whickered and nudged my hand I realised that I should have known this would be Mark's horse. Who else would the black horse belong to? Amber climbed down and went to ready the feeds. As I watched her I switched to scratching Justice behind the ear. "You know what they have then?"

Amber nodded and started to meticulously fill a couple of feed bags. "Daddy made sure I could do it. I'm not supposed to be in the barn alone though..." Climbing back up onto the stool she handed Justice's feed to me. "I can't reach..."

Smiling, I took the bag and tipped it into the manger. "Glad I can be of some use then..." While I fed Justice and moved to wait for her to prepare Rusty's feed she dragged the stool back over and went to do just that. "Must be great having your own horse here."

Nodding, she hoisted herself up and sat on the stool to talk to me. "I love them both. Mommy wouldn't even let me have a dog."

"Really? Wow... I love animals. The more I can have around me the better."

Amber scratched Rusty's muzzle, frowning deeply. "Mommy said they made the house smell funny."

Leaning on the door I smiled a little and played with Rusty's mane. "Maybe they do, but they do an awful lot more than that."

"Mommy doesn't care..."

Bothered by the expression on the little girl's face I crouched down to her level. "Honey, you live with Daddy now. You just have to worry about what he says, and stuff about animals making the house smell funny won't be one of them."

She thought for a long moment then brightened suddenly. "Daddy likes dogs!" Smiling, she jumped off the stool. "I'm gonna ask him if I can have a puppy!" Without another word she tore off out of the barn.

I was forced to race after her. "One, Daddy is still asleep, and two, you haven't fed your horse yet..."

Skidding to a halt she toppled over. "Oops!" She giggled as she scrambled back to her feet and raced back. "I forgot Rusty..."

Chuckling I traipsed back after her. "Maybe it'd be best to wait for Daddy to be awake before springing the puppy idea on him."

"Nu uh... if he's sleepin he won't know he said yes til I already have the puppy." An evil grin crossed her face and, if I had ever been in any doubt who her father might have been those doubts would have been wiped away right there. She looked every inch Mark's child with that expression.

Having to admire the cunning of the girl at such a young age I shook my head and laughed. "Very true... but I still think it would be best to wait." Just as I spoke the sound of a sliding door shutting carried over to us and I looked at Amber. "Sounds like it may be too late anyway..." She wrinkled her nose but climbed back up to Rusty as he ate. "You could try asking him anyway. He might say yes."

Mark's voice came loudly from outside the barn. "Jade? Amber? You out here?"

"In the barn," I called from where I was.

He pushed open the door and came in. "You all had me worried for a minute..."

"Worried? Why?"

With a huge yawn he stretched and scratched at his beard. "I woke up and neither of you were in the house..."

"Amber woke me up to come help her feed the horses." Grinning I went back to fussing over Rusty.

Mark raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at Amber. "You woke her up to feed Rusty and Justice?"

Amber shifted a little. "She didn't mind..."

Turning to face them I shook my head. "Nope, I didn't mind at all. I miss being around horses."

He sighed heavily. "I guess it's alright then... She knows she's supposed to wait for me though..."

"Go easy on her. She knows now, and this is all pretty new."

"I'm not mad... not at all. Just gotta point it out before sweet pea here gets too big for her britches..." He chuckled and lifted Amber up onto his knee, his foot on her stool so that she could get closer to Rusty. Nodding I went back to murmuring quietly to Justice as he ate. "Ya know, I think these two need a good run," he said suddenly.

I smiled and smoothed my hand down the sleek black neck. "Never met one that didn't like the idea."

"Can we?!" Amber burst out excitedly.

Mark set her down on her feet. "You go get me that bridle off the wall and I'll get Justice a saddle for Jade." Kissing the top of her head he gave her a gentle swat on the butt to get her moving.

Thinking I must have misheard him I looked up sharply. "Me?"

"Unless you don't wanna..."

My eyes moved back to Justice and I grinned. "That's like saying I don't want to breathe."

Walking over to me swiftly he pulled me close for a second. "Well then... go on and get to know him better." Nudging me out of the way he opened the stall door so that I could get closer to Justice and introduce myself properly. As I did so Mark sidled in and started to bridle him.

The movement caught my attention and I turned to him, smiling broadly. "Got that saddle?" I ended up saddling Justice myself as Rusty's saddle proved to be way too much for Amber to handle although she was determined to try. Then again it was nearly as big as she was.

Finally he left Amber to just check the buckles on her saddle and wandered over to open the barn doors to the outside. "You all about ready?"

"We're good to go over here."

"I can't REACH!" Amber burst out irritably and hopped up trying to grab the saddler horn. Stifling a snigger I led Justice out of his stall and waited for Amber to be sorted.

Mark chuckled and smiled over at me before heading over and giving Amber a boost up into the saddle. "There, now walk him out into the yard." Amber clicked her tongue at Rusty and got him moving, letting me lead Justice after her to get on him outside. "Amber honey, don't try anything crazy now... Jade'll tell on you." With those parting words and a grin he headed back towards the house.

Laughing, I put a foot in the stirrup and swung myself up on to Justice's back. "OK kiddo, where are we going?"

"You just follow me... I know where to go." Smiling widely she nudged Rusty in the ribs and moved off across the yard and I followed, soon seeing that Mark had retrieved a cup of coffee and brought it out so that he could lean on the fence and watch us. Mostly by that point I was trying not to get dizzy as Amber galloped circles round me, laughing wildly.

"Having fun there?" I asked, kicking Justice on a little faster.

Amber kept laughing and straightened up to shoot off across the yard. "C'mon JADE!!!" Turning her horse she rode him straight over a fallen tree making Mark flinch and nearly spill his coffee. Shaking my head I turned Justice and told him to go, shouting happily as I followed her over the tree.

"JESUS! YOU'RE GONNA KILL ME!" Mark shouted, laughing madly at our antics.

Amber trotted back over next to me. "Rusty likes to jump."

"So I see... But I think we're putting years on your Daddy."

Amber looked over and waved at her father. "He's already old..." she laughed.

Snorting I fought to hold in a laugh of my own. "He's not that old."

Amber looked at me as if I had suddenly grown another head. "Trust me... he's old..."

"OK then, he doesn't seem as old to me as he does to you."

"I guess..." She shrugged and then her face lit up as if she'd had a brilliant idea, tearing off towards where Mark stood at the fence. Highly puzzled I frowned and directed my horse after her.

"Daddy!! Is Jade old??"

Mark burst out laughing. "Uh... no... why would you ask that honey?"

I was left huffing indignantly. "I am NOT old."

"See?" Mark said. "She's not old..."

Amber sighed heavily. "Well you're old..." She looked over at me. "If she's not old how can she be my new mommy?"

I pulled Justice up a few strides away and mouthed impotently as Mark desperately tried to control his laughter and looked pleadingly at me. "Amber honey... you've got a mommy... and uh... Jade is gonna be around for quite a while I hope so it doesn't matter if she's your new mom. She's uh... she's my friend..." Giving up he dropped his head into his folded arms on the rail.

"Yeah... friend..." Beyond that I completely failed to find any words.

Amber looked thoroughly annoyed with the pair of us and folded her arms. "My mommy sucks! I want Jade!" I looked cautiously from one to the other as Mark's head snapped up.

He took a deep breath and shook his head. "Amber... that's not very nice at all little girl. You shouldn't talk about your mother that way..."

"But daddy..." Amber whined. "You like Jade... I think we should keep her."

Mark shifted and climbed up to straddle the fence rail so he wasn't having to look up at her. "Yeah honey... I do like Jade." His eyes shifted to where I was leaning on Justice's neck and trying to be invisible. "I love her..." Grinning he turned back to Amber. "But you get one mommy in life. I'm sorry yours isn't very nice sweet pea... Jade can be your friend too though. She's gonna be stayin with us and I love it that you want her to be here too but you don't have to call her mommy. She's not... but she's just as good." He smiled widely over at me as he finished talking.

Amber looked slightly mollified. "So we can keep her without her being my new mommy?"

Finally I managed to regain the power of speech. "Nothing has to change from what it is right now. I'm not planning on going anywhere soon."

The little girl swivelled in her saddle to look at me. "Don't you wanna marry my daddy?"

Blinking at her I looked to Mark. "Where did that come from?"

"I have no idea..." He swung his other leg over the fence and raised his arms up to Amber. "C'mon little girl. I think Rusty's all run out for now."

"Awww...Daddy!!" she grumbled, swatting at his hands as he lifted her up but then relenting to his superior size and strength. "Can we have a dog?"

"What?!" Mark burst out. At the sight of his face I was forced to hide my face in my horse's mane to smother the giggling. "A dog? Where'd that come from?" he chuckled.

Amber turned to me, pointing. "Jade said you'd let me have a dog."

Spluttering I sat up quickly. "I did not! All I said was you couldn't ask him when he was asleep." Mark hoisted Amber up onto his hip and looked calculatingly at both of us, making a considering noise in his throat. I shrugged a little. "I grew up surrounded by animals..."

"I did too..." he answered, looking as if he was still thinking.

Amber thumped him on the shoulder. "Daddy? Puppy??" To emphasise her point she gave him the little kid puppy dog eyes of his own.

Mark caught her hand as she tried to thump him again. "Stop it now..." Turning to me he gave me a questioning look. "What do you think?"

"I think kids should have pets. I always said if I ever had kids they'd have all kinds of pets round them."

"Alright then..." He set Amber down on her feet. "Go on and lead Rusty back inside okay?" As Amber moved to do as she was told he walked over and took Justice's reins, leading us back into the barn as well. "Wanna see a little girl wet herself?" he chuckled.

"I knew it..."

"I'm a sucker for a beautiful woman..." Shrugging he turned back to Amber. "Honey, help me get Rusty's saddle off and brush him down then we'll go over to the animal shelter and see what we can do about a dog."

His daughter's eyes opened wide and round. "REALLY?!"

"Yeah really...but you've gotta take care of it. Okay? You've gotta keep up on feedin it and playin with it and pickin up after it..." Smiling at the pair of them I slid out of the saddle and led Justice in to his stall to rub him down.

"I PROMISE I will!!!" she replied, jumping up and down. I put the saddle I had been using to one side and turned back to groom Justice, hiding the huge grin at just how easily Mark had given in. He took over taking care of Rusty as Amber was far too busy bouncing around to do the job and came back over to me once he was done.

"What's that look for?"

Desperately I adopted my most innocent look. "Nothing..." I said as I came out of the stall. "I'm all done."

Mark raised an eyebrow but let the subject drop as he looked back at Amber. "Sweet pea? Go get yourself washed up so we can get goin." She immediately disappeared, eager to go and find herself a puppy.

"Uh... I should wash up too..." I edged towards the door, thinking he was going to give me grief over the fact I had been laughing at him.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me back effortlessly, planting a fabulous kiss on me then pulled back, grinning. "You know you forgot somethin today. You were supposed to tell your landlord to take a flyin leap an hour ago."

"Shit!" I exclaimed, looking at my watch. "Guess I have a call to make then."

Mark burst out laughing. "Looks that way..." He kissed me again, his hands sliding down to rest against my lower back. "Don't take too long though, there's a little girl in there that's got us on a timer right now."

Unable to help myself I pressed against him for a second. "I'll be as quick as I can."

"You go call... I'll get a shower. Amber'll be pickin out names so she'll be fine." Dropping an arm over my shoulders he steered us back towards the house.

I snorted quietly. "At least it got her mind off other stuff."

He blew out a deep breath. "That's for sure..." Realising the overly relieved tone he was using he stopped. "Not that... I'm totally against the idea... just... one step at a time right?"

Feeling slightly mean I raised an eyebrow. "You could give a girl a complex you know..."

"A complex how?"

Unable to keep my control my mouth twitched as I fought a grin. "That sound of relief..."

His shoulders dropped as he deflated a little beside me. "Neither one of us has been divorced very long baby girl..."

Realising that he didn't know I was playing with him I stopped and turned to face him. "Relax, I'm just teasing. Besides, I'm not sure it's something I'd ever do again."

Mark's face suddenly went strategically blank. "Ah... well there's that too. Can't say I'm terribly keen on the idea myself." He started us on our way towards the house again.

"So it's easy then. We go on as we are."

He stopped me as we reached the door. "I love you darlin... that's all that matters."

Smiling softly I squeezed his arm. "I love you too. As long as that's the case, I'm happy."

There was a bang as Amber virtually threw herself against the glass door from the inside in her impatience. "Come ON!!!!"

Her actions made me laugh as I felt the tension lifting a little. "I have to make a phone call, but it'll be real quick." Mark pointed at her and shooed her away from the door and I had to smile again as she traipsed away. "You'd better get in the shower if you're going or she'll be coming in to get you."

Rolling his eyes he opened the door. "Back in no time..." He kissed me once again and headed off towards the bathroom. As soon as he was out of sight I grabbed my phone and let my landlord, or rather ex landlord, know of my plans and then went to find Amber to try and stop her spontaneously combusting before Mark was ready to go. He chuckled when he sauntered out of the bathroom, a towel slung around his hips. "Oh good, she hasn't left without us..."

"I think she might if we're much longer..." Much as I tried I couldn't help looking him over.

Amber sighed theatrically and shoved at his leg. "Go get dressed!"

"You know," I grinned over at her, "I have to get your Daddy and his friends moving for part of my job, and I never found pushing him to work yet."

"Yeah well, she's got the Calaway stubbornness in 'er." He grunted as he was shoved again. "Yeah yeah... I'm goin..."

"Oh, I know all about Calaway stubbornness..." I muttered to myself.

Amber wandered over and sat on the floor next to me. "He's lazy."

I opted for the diplomatic reply. "He can be hard to get moving."

"Nope... he's lazy."

"Not a very nice thing to say about your Daddy."

She looked up at me, clearly exasperated. "Well he IS..." Her arms flailed around as she spoke. "By the time he's ready to go all the dogs will be taken!"

"Oh, I doubt it very much. They have an awful lot of dogs to find homes for."

"There'd better be..." she grumbled.

Just at that point Mark emerged, wrapping a bandana around his forehead. "Well what're you waitin for? Let's go..." Without waiting for a response he headed for the garage. I looked on as Amber made a goodish attempt at breaking the world record for the one hundred metres and followed behind, catching up just as Mark unlocked a rarely driven SUV, putting Amber in the back and climbing in himself.

"Okay…" I said as I got in last of all. "Let's go show Amber that all the dogs have not been taken already."

Several hours later we drew up outside the house again but this time we were accompanied by a wriggly and extremely cute puppy that Amber decided to christen Angel. Watching the pair of them together I had a strange feeling she was going to turn out to be anything but, especially as I watched Mark trail in on several trips to carry in all the 'necessities' that one puppy had been deemed to need. "That is going to be one spoilt pooch."

"Seems everyone here's pretty damn spoiled..." Mark commented as he watched Amber drag the dog bed across the kitchen floor to find the perfect place for it.

"I protest! I am not spoilt," I exclaimed as I started cooking dinner, which for some strange reason I had volunteered to do.

"Yeah well you don't technically live here just yet..." he grinned in reply. "We still gotta get your stuff."

"You've seen my place. You know I don't have a lot of stuff." I crossed my arms over my chest. "I am not spoiled."

Grinning once more he gave me a heated once over. "Not yet you're not..."

Catching sight of his expression I grinned back. "Guess we'll just have to see what happens."

"I guess we will..." Chuckling he went to play with Amber and the puppy. I watched them from time to time as I made frosting to go with the chocolate cake I had felt like making. After a while Mark glanced over. "Damn that smells good. Any chance we'll be eating this century?" He grinned then yelped as the puppy nipped his finger. Grimacing at him I put the cake to one side, finished with it.

"OK, put the puppy down to rest for a bit and go wash up for dinner."

After managing to convince Mark that he had to do the washing up thing as well I smiled at the puppy asleep in her bed, tired out from all the attention as I fetched out the lasagna, salad and bread that I had gotten ready. Mark sat himself down and gestured for more as I doled the food out onto the plates.

"I'm a big guy baby girl..." Pulling a face at him I kept piling it on. "Maybe you shoulda made two... I dunno what you all are gonna eat."

I swatted him lightly on the arm. "There is other stuff here..." Pointing around the table I indicated the salad and bread. Mark grimaced but took some bread.

Feeling playful I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, grinning and sticking the tip of my tongue out through my teeth. "Gonna sit on your next opponent and squash him for the pin then?"

"Very funny..." he grumbled, begrudgingly scooping up some salad.

Putting some greenery on Amber's plate I sat down and grabbed some bread myself to hide the lack of vegetation on my own plate.

"Jade you gotta eat the salad too!" Amber burst out.

"Oh... No, that's fine..."

Mark looked at my plate. "Oh c'mon darlin... this is SO not fair..." He reached for the bowl, snorting, and made to dump some salad on my plate. Glaring at him I twitched my plate closer to myself, causing him to quirk an eyebrow and lean in closer to me. "Oh you've gotta do physical stuff... I promise you'll need your strength."

Shivering suddenly I help my plate out. "Well, if you put it like that..." In answer he just grinned at me. Shaking my head at how easily he got me to give in I ate with as much good grace as I could muster. "What's the plan for this evening?"

Amber piped up straight away. "I wanna stay up with Angel."

"Puppies need their sleep. So do little girls..."

Mark abandoned the salad and tore into his lasagna. "Jade's right little girl..."

Nodding in agreement, I took some more bread. "If you want Angel to grow up big and strong, you have to let her get plenty of sleep."

"Can I have cake first?"

"Yeah, I should think you can have some cake before you go."

"What about me? I ate the damn salad," Mark chuckled.

My eyes rolled. "OK, I think everyone can have cake."

Mark high fived Amber. "See? We rule."

Once I had actually managed to get the plate away from Mark who had suddenly decided he needed to eat the rest of the lasagna and laughed at Amber's growls of impatience I fetched out the cake.

"Can Angel have some cake too?" Amber asked as I passed it to Mark.

"No... Chocolate is poisonous to dogs and it's chocolate cake."

She frowned. "Can she have some lasagna then? It's not fair for us to be eatin all this good stuff in front of her."

"Sweet pea, people food is bad for dogs. You don't want her to get all fat do ya?"

I nodded in agreement with Mark. "That's why we bought her all that puppy food."

"But it's gross!!"

I burst out laughing at the insistence in her tone. "Not to dogs it isn't."

"But I tried it and it's gross!"

Mark nearly dropped the cake. "You TRIED Angel's food? Why would you do that?"

"It just tastes like chalk..." She wrinkled her nose. "I don't know how it can be good to Angel."

"There are very clever people that make it. They know all about what's good for dogs and that's why we should feed Angel the stuff that they make, not human food."

Mark nodded as I spoke then stopped and turned to look at Amber. "Wait... how do you know what chalk tastes like?" Amber simply grinned, laughing.

"I have a feeling you don't really want to know..." Grinning right along with her I relieved him of the cake.

"Probably not..." Turning, he dug out a knife.

"I'm going to have to make another one of these. I got a bit keen making the frosting." I rolled my eyes and chuckled as he passed it to me. "There's half a bowl sitting in the fridge."

Mark's eyes lit up. "I'll make a note of that..."

"You'd better not be thinking about eating that when I'm not looking..." I growled.

Walking over to where I was cutting the cake he wrapped his arms around my waist to whisper quietly in my ear. "Oh you'll be there when I'm eatin it darlin..." He nipped to top of my ear gently.

Shivering hard I dropped the knife. "Oh... that's different then..."

"Stop buggin Jade while she's cutting the cake..." Amber spoke indignantly. Suddenly remembering what I was supposed to be doing I cut her a piece and watched her toddle off happily back to the table then dropped the knife back onto the side, having lost any hunger for cake I might have had.

Mark chuckled as he took a chunk for himself. "I am all about some cake." Grinning, he took it into the living room to watch Sportscenter as he ate. Shaking my head I started to clear up only to be interrupted when he returned a few minutes to cut another piece before disappearing again. Shaking my head once more I put the rest of the cake away and went back to clearing up the kitchen.

Shortly after Mark came back, empty plate in hand and stared at the space where the cake had been. "Where'd the cake go?"

"I put it away. I would actually like to get to eat some of it..."

He grunted. "Guess you could have some..." Handing me his plate he turned to look at Amber. "Ah God little girl... shower... now..." I turned to see what the problem was and burst out laughing at just how far over herself his daughter seemed to have got the chocolate.

For her part Amber just looked up, frosting nearly all the way round to her ears. "What?"

"Did you eat it or roll in it?" I sniggered.

Mark clapped his hands and attempted to shoo her. "C'mon kid, bath tub..."

"Have fun with that..." Rolling my eyes I headed towards the TV and settled in to find a movie.

A few minutes later Mark emerged shirtless from where he had carried Amber to the bathroom and wiping his hands on a towel. "It's like she went in head first..." He settled down beside me, his arm laying across the back of the couch behind me.

Turning towards him a little I rested my head on his chest and chuckled. "I didn't think I even made that much frosting..."

Sighing contentedly he propped his foot on the coffee table. "I'm... really glad you're here beautiful..."

I threw my arm over his stomach. "Feels good to be home."

"I'm glad you're thinkin of this as home..."

"I started thinking of it as home as soon as I left to go back on the road. Strange but true."

His arm dropped from the back of the couch to my shoulders and he pulled me close against his side, dropping a kiss on my temple. "Nothin makes me happier darlin..."

Sighing contentedly I snuggled in close. "This is nice..."

Nodding, he flipped through the channels. "Sure is. I'm tryin real hard not to think about you goin back out."

"We have a few days before that happens. It's going to be mad when I do though. There's another international tour coming right up."

"And I'm not on it..." He sighed a little wistfully.

"Nope, sadly not. I could do with you there too - it sounds like I'm getting the bulk of this one this time."

"Maybe... we could go..." He hugged me tighter. "Amber's never been to Europe..." His voice sounded entirely too hopeful and I had to shake my head.

"They're going to want to start trailing the feud build up to your last match very soon."

Sighing heavily this time he nodded. "I've gotta stay close to Connecticut for meetings." A grumbling note entered his voice. "I don't want you on a whole different continent baby girl..."

"We knew this would have to happen somewhen. I'll be fine. It's not a bad crowd going over there." He shrugged, grumping a bit as I went on. "I think I'm going to end up rooming with Tara over there. Can't say I'm thrilled about that idea."

"What about Glen?"

Settling myself more comfortably I shook my head. "He's not going."

I felt him stiffen and then slowly force himself to relax underneath me. "He's not... why not?"

"He's taking a few days off, having a bit of a break and the dates have just come out like that." As the programme we had been watching finished I grabbed the remote, only vaguely hearing his response as I chuckled. "I'm a lot shorter than I'm used to on big guys with this trip."

"You still got Show and Khali..." He shifted a little. "...and Dave..."

"Yeah, those are my big fellas over there." He took the remote from me and starting going through the channels again, making a slight assenting noise in his throat, prompting me to pause and then lean up on an elbow to look at him. "You're not happy with this are you?"

He shrugged. "I'm fine with it. Can't very well be any other way with it can I?"

Sitting up I leant my elbows on my knees. "Don't give me that... Be honest with me, Mark."

He rolled his eyes up towards the ceiling briefly as if gathering his thoughts and then sighed. "Honest huh? I don't like you out there alone, no..."

"I'm not alone though, am I? I'm surrounded by people the whole time, people you've known for years."

"You were surrounded by people I've known for years when all hell broke loose..."

I took a couple of deep breaths to calm myself before replying. "True, but there's always someone that knows what's happened, that knows to keep a watch on me near me now."

Mark shook his head. "I know... I know... I just... can't help but worry. Watchin you downstairs..." Biting his lip he stared down at the floor.

I turned to face him. "Come on Mark, talk to me."

"We've already talked about those few days. We don't need to get into it again."

It was my turn to sigh heavily. "I don't know... I talk to Glen about it sometimes."

"There ain't a day that goes by that I don't think about it and thank whatever's up there that it wasn't worse." He sniffed softly. "It was bad enough."

My head hung as I was taken back to that time. "I can't begin to think about it being worse. There are days when I can barely cope with what happened as it is."

He was silent for a long time, his eyes too shiny. "The... things you said..."

My own eyes filmed over and I screwed them shut tightly for a brief second. "None of what I said meant a damn thing. None of it was true. It wasn't even really me that was in there."

Letting out a deep breath he grabbed my hand, rubbing his thumb anxiously over my knuckle. "I know it wasn't... I've been on the wrong side of addiction little girl. But I can't get the words out of my head."

I could feel the tears threatening to spill as I glanced up at him. "I've never even thought those things I said. Not a single one of them."

Taking a shuddering breath he stood suddenly. "How could you think I was serious in that bar? We talked about it... We said we were gonna have to make it good. It had to be a good show Jade!" He wiped at the wetness fighting its way down his cheek.

I curled up on the end of the couch, hugging my knees to my chest in search of the comfort I didn't feel I really deserved. "I thought it would be easy, to stand there and take it. All the things you were saying..." I took a huge shuddery breath of my own. "They were all the things that had scared me since this all started."

He pinched the bridge of his nose as he paced the room. "I went too far. I know I did... I'm so sorry for that." Rolling his neck he cracked it to either side. "But why didn't you have a little more faith in me? Why'd you..."

I knew what was coming, but I also knew it had to be said so I swallowed and forced myself to speak. "Why did I what?"

He shook his head sadly. "Dave? Why... fucking... Dave...?" Looking down he forced his hands to open from the fists they had become.

My head dropped to rest in my hands. "I never meant for it to happen. Neither of us did."

"But it did... and you fucking threw it in my face Jade. Threw it in Dave's too." Stopping abruptly he moved to stare out of the window.

I thumped the back of the couch suddenly. "Don't you think I know that? I fucked up totally and I'm never going to get back from that, not really."

"I'm not sayin this to hurt you."

"If I could choose to change one thing in my entire past, it would be that. It did more damage than any of the Jack or the drugs. Far more damage."

"You know, I always swore I'd leave anyone who cheated on me til that night. God I wanted to but I'd look at you and even with that fuckin venom in your eyes you were my Jade. MY Jade! I couldn't... I can't let ya go."

My head shook as I stared at the floor, not seeing anything really. "I don't deserve this. I always prided myself on my morals. Always swore I'd never cheat or even be involved with someone cheating on someone else." A bitter sigh came from my throat. "Guess I didn't know myself all that well."

Mark snorted. "We're both fucked up. Nothin about this relationship qualifies as normal but here we are..." He sighed. "And I can't imagine not knowing you were comin back to me."

Finally I dared to look up at him again. "Wherever I go, I'll always come back."

Quickly he strode across the room to me and took hold of my hands, pulling me up to hug me close to his chest. "I'd come and find ya." I could feel him tremble as he held me tightly. "Jade, I don't know what you've done to me but with you I'm not myself."

"I still get scared you're going to come to your senses and kick me out."

"I love you... I couldn't..."

Burying my face in his chest I could feel my muscles start to slowly relax from where I had been holding them completely tense. "I've never quite understood what we are, where we're going. It made me weak, made me doubt things I shouldn't have done."

"That's my fault." His voice sounded shaky, as if he was fighting tears. "I shouldn't have suggested what we did. It wasn't fair to you..." Another ragged breath came from him. "I just... wanted Amber away from her momma so bad..."

"You didn't force me to do it. It was my choice to go along with it. My insecurities aren't your fault. I just wanted to make you happy and ended up doing anything but."

"I could've reassured you... I could've made an effort..."

I snorted softly. "You said yourself... It had to look good. God knows it looked good."

"Too fucking good." His demeanour changed suddenly for the worse. "So good you had to go to someone else for comfort." Pulling away from me he stalked out onto the porch, punching the support pillar and leaving a knuckle shaped dent in the wood.

I followed, leaning nervously in the doorway. "Mark, it happened. We can never change that. But it was just that one night. I've never been tempted since. What I want I have right here. It came to me the next... the next morning when I woke up and saw where I was. When I knew what I thought I'd thrown away, lost forever. There is no one else that I want. If I can't have you then I don't care where I am."

He stood silent for a long moment staring out over the yard. "You have no idea how much that hurt..." His voice was barely audible.

My head dropped back against the doorframe with an audible thud. "I can't change the past. I can't take it back. If I could I would, but I can't and that just about tears me up." I wrapped my arms tightly around myself, fighting desperately for control.

Mark took a deep breath. "We don't have to talk about this... I didn't wanna talk about this. I just gotta let it go..."

As much as I wanted to take the out he was offering me I knew I couldn't. "We're going to have to talk about it somewhen. It's just going to be there poisoning everything if we don't." Digging my cigarettes out of my pocket I lit one with a shaky hand.

Glancing back at me he held out a hand. "Think I need one of those too." I looked at him strangely but handed them over, watching as he lit one and handed them back, taking a deep drag like a pro. "Surprise, I usedta smoke." He took another long pull at it. "You're right though...This has got to be dealt with. It's gonna eat at me." He looked down, chagrined. "It already is..."

"We're in it right now..." He turned towards me but his eyes moved to somewhere behind me and I looked to see a small towel-wrapped bundle in the doorway.

"Daddy? I'm done with my bath."

Turning away quickly he tossed the cigarette and wiped at his face before going to pick her up, smiling softly. "You ready for bed angel face?"

"Yep..." Grinning back at him she wrapped her arms around his neck. I saw him look at me and mouth that he would be right back and then he took her away to put her to bed.

It was about half an hour before he returned, looking very, very tired. By that point I was surrounded by the remains of an intense chain smoking session, leaning against the pillar he had dented earlier and staring at nothing in particular.

"She OK?"

He nodded and chuckled forlornly. "Yeah... she told me to be nice to you."

I winced a little. "Perceptive little thing, isn't she?"

"Too much so..."

Shifting so I could look at him I voiced my thoughts. "Then we need to sort this..."

His eyes focused somewhere else, he nodded and took a deep breath, holding out a hand to me. "We do..." Pulling myself to my feet I took his hand, a little surprised when he led me up to our bedroom. Seeing my confusion he shrugged slightly. "Gotta be able to hear Amber."

There was a moment of relief that there would be no shouting with Amber in earshot. "So..."

"So..." Sighing forlornly he sank onto the edge of the bed.

Thinking over my words I settled nearby. "I don't know what I can say. It feels like I'm going round in circles."

"I'm gonna be plain about this. I don't... talk much about this... but I'm gonna try here." Sighing again he moved to look at me. "I don't want you on the road alone with Dave."

"It's my job, Mark. I understand, I really do but there's nothing I can do about it."

"I know... and I don't wanna stop you but I 'm not comfortable with it. You wanted honest and that's as honest as I can be. I never said it was rational."

"Apart from the Europe tour, it won't come up for some time anyway."

He nodded. "Glen'll be back and then I'll be around for my last hurrah." Looking just a little guilty he kind of crumpled in on himself.

Sighing heavily I stared at my hands clasped in my lap. "Maybe I should give TNA a call..."

Grumbling, he laid back on the bed, his arm over his eyes. "Jesus Jade... That's not what I'm sayin..."

"OK, bad time to attempt a joke..." I shifted uncomfortably.

"I'm sorry... Not much in a jokin mood." Sitting up suddenly he looked at me. "I don't wanna freak out over this. I want ya with me. I wanna know that when you leave, you're comin home again."

"Wherever I go, whoever it's with, I'll be coming back here. This is where I belong, and I haven't felt like I've belonged somewhere in a long time." I turned to face him. "I will do just about anything it takes to make you happy, you know that right?"

He gave the tiniest of nods. "I'm learnin..." Sighing, his head moved from side to side slowly as he tentatively took my hand in his. "I'm possessive... I'm abrasive... and I'm quick to fire up... but I'm yours for as long as you want me."

Smiling very slightly I laced my fingers through his. "I want you for as long as I can get you."

At last he smiled. "Guess we're gonna be here a while..."

My hand raised and I ran a finger down his cheek, meaning every word I spoke. "I'd stay here forever."

Turning his head he kissed my finger and then grew serious again. "This is... gonna come out of me from time to time. I'm gonna blow up about it. Just... don't listen to me. I'll get over it."

It was my turn to become serious as I watched him. "You're talking to the queen of internalizing feelings. It never does any good. If you need to blow up then blow up. I can't pretend I'm always going to take it very well but it needs to be done."

"The last thing I wanna do is hurt you darlin..."

"I'll get over it if you do. No matter how much I'd like it to, this isn't going to disappear any time soon. Or ever."

Tiredly he nodded. "I hate this..."

Dropping back onto the bed I curled up into a ball. "I'm stuck Mark. I can't see how to get past this."

"One day at a time baby girl...that's all..." He curled up behind me and kissed my cheek. "I know I'm damn happy you're here with me now."

Sighing to release the tension I moved to get the maximum contact. "One day at a time... I don't want to be anywhere else right now."

Taking in a deep shuddering breath he slid his hand under my shirt to graze across my belly, making me breathe in sharply and come out in goose bumps under his touch. "I do love you Jade..." Leaning closer still he kissed the side of my neck.

Wriggling, I managed to turn over and face him. "I love you too... Never doubt that I love you."

Locking his fingers behind my back he looked right into my eyes. "I don't anymore baby girl... I did... when everything was goin on but I know how addiction works... I just wanted to believe better of ya, I guess..."

Sighing, I stared at a point over his shoulder. "Yeah, I'd have believed better of me too if you'd asked me before. I always said I wasn't a saint but never realised I'd ever do the things I've done."

"Important part is to learn from it..." Hearing the cliché come from his mouth he shook his head.

"Oh, I learned from it alright."

"I learned from it too darlin..."

Shifting closer I rested my forehead against the side of his neck. "Is there any more to say right now?"

Shaking his head he moved me until he could put his forehead against mine. "I don't suppose so no... I'm just glad we're not screamin and throwin stuff." A strangled chuckle came from his throat.

"Never been one for throwing stuff... And I wouldn't shout with Amber in hearing range."

"See? I love the way you think..." Kissing me softly he rolled onto his back, pulling me onto his chest and stroked my hair gently, trying to relax. "I hate conversations like that. I'm wiped out now."

"Get some sleep then."

"Can't... gotta let the puppy out before she goes ahead and shits on the floor." He moved to get up but I rested the flat of my hand against his chest to stop him.

"You... bed... sleep. I'll deal with Angel."

Lifting my hand off of himself he kissed it. "That's okay darlin... I wanna check on the Sweet pea anyway." He rolled me back into the pillows and got up very slowly, looking as if his hips were bothering him.

"Are they bad? You've been moving badly since I got here."

He shrugged. "Amber's worse than goin twenty minutes with Glen." Chuckling he moved off, his stride getting easier as he walked.

Totally wiped out from the conversation we had just had I stripped off and had a very long very hot shower, coming out to find that there was still no sign of Mark. Dragging on one of his shirts I went to find him and discovered him standing in Amber's doorway, watching her sleep.

"Hey…"

He jumped slightly as he turned to me but pulled me tight against the side of his body. "This is too perfect ya know?"

"What do you mean?"

Sighing he squeezed me to himself. "This is my family... right here... in one house. I've got you by my side and my daughter." He let out a deep breath. "I got my daughter Jade." He stopped, fighting a rising tide of emotion.

I moved round to the front of him. "And that makes a lot of the shit that's gone on worth it."

Wrapping his arms around me he dropped his chin onto the top of my head. "Yeah... it does... we gotta let this shit go... I'm gonna try like hell to."

"It'll come, in time." Amber shifted in her sleep, her leg flopping off the side of the bed as we watched.

Mark chuckled low in his throat and then took a step back to look at me. "C'mon... let's get some sleep."

Dragging the tie out of my hair I started to braid it as I walked along the hallway. "Yeah... sleep." Mark moved my hands and braided my hair for me, then moved to rub my shoulders. "Mmm, that's nice..." My head dropped forwards immediately.

His hands kept moving across my shoulder blades and down my back. "Feels like ya need it."

"Sure feels good..."

Moving with that spooky speed all of his own he scooped me up with a hand under my knees and carried me to the bed, setting me down. "On your stomach..." Quickly I did as I was told, virtually purring in anticipation as he straddled my thighs and pulls the shirt off me, going over my body with a fine toothed comb.

"Oh wow," I muttered, melting into the mattress as Mark chuckled over me, working down to my lower back. "You're good."

"You're damn right I am..." Laughing quietly he moved down over my buttocks and thighs as I wriggled and arched into his hands, cooing and sighing ecstatically. He worked right down over my calves and finally my feet before kissing my back between my shoulder blades and settling beside me. "Feel better?"

Unable to summon the energy to move I opened one eye at him. "Oh god yes..." Chuckling contentedly he reached over and turned out the light. Cuddling in right next to him I rested an arm on his stomach and threw one leg over his.

Tucking me in tight against him he kissed my head and then yawned. "Maybe tomorrow we'll put that extra frosting to use." I didn't need light to know that he was grinning to himself as I prodded him gently in the stomach.

"Pervert..." I giggled.

"Yep...damn good at it too."


	36. Chapter 36

We had just finished eating breakfast the next morning when the phone rang and Mark got up to answer it. His words washed over me as I sat finishing off my coffee.

"Hello?... Oh hey momma... yeah she's here. Well lemme see?" He held the phone against his chest. "Sweet pea, you wanna talk to Grandma?"

"YEAH!" Amber exclaimed, jumping up to take the phone. I had to smile as I wrapped my hands lovingly around my coffee mug.

"Momma loves havin her so close." Mark grinned over at Amber talking so animatedly on the phone.

Nodding and smiling with him I replied. "Yeah... Mum hates Andy's kids being over here. She's never come over to visit and they don't get back to England very often."

"DADDY!" Amber burst out suddenly. "Can I go stay with Grandma tonight?!!"

Mark raised an eyebrow at me and grinned. "Grandma wants to put up with ya all night?"

Amber spoke quickly into the phone then looked up again. "Yes!"

"Well then, tell 'er she can keep ya til the gypsies come by to get ya." He grinned at me as he spoke.

"Oh yeah, you really mean that..." My eyes rolled at the very idea.

"Shhh... she don't know that," he chuckled.

Amber hung up the phone and ran over to us. "Grandma says there ARE no gypsies." She was clearly annoyed as she stood there with her little hands planted firmly on her hips.

"Oh, gypsies are very good at disguises..." All the while I was fighting for a straight face.

"Nu uh..."

Still highly amused at Amber's display of attitude I grinned over at here. "So you're going to see your Grandma, huh?"

"Yep... she's gonna take me to the carnival!"

Mark rolled his eyes. "Great, so she's gonna feed you full of cotton candy and corn dogs huh?"

"Isn't that what grandparents are for?" I asked.

"Sure is..." he chuckled. "Hey sweet pea, go get yourself some stuff packed 'fore grandma gets here."

Suddenly nervous at the prospect of Mark's mother turning up there I stretched and attempted nonchalance. "I think I might go for a run. Stretch my legs out a little."

Mark laughed outright. "Goin for a run my ass... chicken shit."

I glared back at him. "Chicken shit?"

"Yep... you're afraid of meetin my mom."

Sighing heavily I gave up the pretence. "I don't have a good track record with mothers."

Snorting loudly he waved me off. "You haven't met mine. She's... a saint."

I looked him over and grinned. "I guess she'd have to be..."

"Oh not just me... remember baby girl, there were five of us..." With a deep chuckle he turned to go and check on his daughter, leaving me shivering at the thought that five brothers meant potentially having to meet a lot of family.

Those thoughts were driven from my head when Amber came stomping back into the kitchen, rolling her eyes. "Jade!! Tell Daddy I NEED to take my Gameboy!"

Mark came following closely behind her. "You do not need video games if you're gonna go to the carnival with your grandma..."

Looking back at the little girl I nodded my agreement. "He's right, you won't need it at the carnival."

In reply she sighed dramatically. "Fine!" Moving so fast that I had no chance to work out what she was going to do she turned and threw the game straight at Mark. I winced as I waited for a flash of the temper I had seen from time to time.

Mark caught it and set it down on the counter, staring sternly down at his daughter. "Amber..."

As she stared up at her father Amber seemed to realise what she had done. "I'm going..." Going into the next room she sat herself on a chair.

"Joys of kids..." I said with a small smile.

Mark chuckled. "Hey, at least she's trained to give herself a time out." Just as he spoke there was a knock on the front door. His head swung in that direction and while his attention was elsewhere I tried subtly to edge my way towards the back door. I had forgotten how eerily quick he could be though and his hand snaked out and wrapped around my wrist. "No ya don't... You wanna go let grandma in little girl?" he called through to Amber.

Watching her leap up and run towards the door I wriggled and twisted my arm in his grip, even though I knew it was completely futile. "Aw, c'mon..."

Not even seeming to notice my attempts to escape Mark pulled me close and planted a quick but earth shattering kiss on me. "It'll be alright. I promise."

"Helloo??" a voice called from the hallway.

Trying hard to believe him I puffed out a breath and muttered to myself. "I can do this..."

Mark winked at me then went to find his mother, leaving me to listen through the open doorway. "Hi Momma... I've uh... got someone I want you to meet."

"Oh?" From where I was peeking around the door in such a position that I could see and not be seen I saw Mark's mother grin playfully, and could see exactly where he had got it from. "Did you finally bring me a woman I'd be proud to call my daughter?"

The little I could see of Mark's face showed him to be blushing before my nerve deserted me and I moved back from the door, still able to hear them talking. "Somethin like that..." he said, and then there was the sound of him turning around to where I should have been. "Where the..." The sound of his approaching footsteps came to where I was skulking in the kitchen, concentrating on finishing clearing up after breakfast. "C'mere," he said as he poked his head around the door, grinning. Wiping my hands I trailed towards him a little reluctantly. He laced his fingers through mine securely and virtually dragged me into the other room. "Momma, this is Jade. The woman I've been tellin you about."

His mother's face lit up and the next I knew she had pulled me into a huge bear hug. "Oh honey! I'm so glad to finally meet you!"

I jerked in surprise but hugged her back gingerly. "It's great to meet you too Mrs Calaway."

She tutted at me. "No, call me Katherine... or momma. Whichever..." Stepping back a little she shrugged happily.

"OK... Katherine..."

"Well, I hate to cut this short but baby girl and I are burnin daylight." Smiling, Katherine hugged me again then moved back to Mark. "You be good now and take care of this one. She is as beautiful as you said she was." Patting him on the cheek she turned to Amber and held out a hand. "C'mon honey...let's get some ice cream."

Bounding over Amber threw herself at us and wrapped one arm around Mark's leg and the other around mine. "Bye!!" Running after her grandma, she called back over her shoulder. "Love you guys!!!" And with that she disappeared out of the door to say goodbye to Angel as well.

As silence descended I chuckled slightly disbelievingly. "Well..." Mark didn't answer, simply standing with his hands shoved deep in his pockets and smiling fit to split his skull. "She sure is something else..."

"Toldja..."

Replaying the conversation in my mind I frowned at him. "Just what have you told her about me?" Shrugging, he turned away and headed for the stairs leading to the basement. Unwilling to drop it I followed him. "Wait just a minute... You said I was the woman you'd been telling her about. So what did you say to her?"

"Told her how you were helpin me deal with Sara when we met... Told her you work for the company, told her you were perfect for me..." Shrugging once more he ducked into the laundry room and grabbed a towel before heading for the weight bench. All I could do was watch him dumbly as my jaw dropped at the last part of what he had said. For his part Mark struggled to keep his face blank as he dropped down onto the bench and lifted the bar off its cradle.

"Wow..." I whispered finally.

Mark grunted as he lifted. "Wow what?"

Fidgeting, I stuffed my hands in the pockets of my jeans. "You told your mother I'm perfect for you?"

"Yep..."

"Did you mean it?" I asked as I watched him lift.

He glanced at me upside down from the bench. "Why would I say it if I didn't mean it?"

I shook my head. "That was a stupid question, but you know me..."

He gritted his teeth as he went for another rep. "Besides, it's true."

Struggling a little to get my head around that thought I settled myself on the floor so that I could watch him work out. "You think I'm perfect for you..."

Mark's chest bulged in the most inviting way as he pushed again. "Matter of fact I do..."

Wanting a better view I shifted closer. "I think I like the sound of that." A faint smile crossed my face as I spoke.

After one more push he reset the bar in its cradle. "Do me a favour since you're sittin there. Drop ten more pounds on either end of this thing so I don't have to get up." Hopping up I did as he asked, grinning as he smirked up at me and lifted the bar again. "Oh shit that's gonna hurt later," he chuckled, forcing the bar up.

I glanced along the bar and worked out how much he was pressing. "Not fucking around, are you?"

Grunting, he gritted his teeth and lifted again. "Gotta do somethin since I'm not..." He pushed again. "...on the road."

Thoughtfully I watched the muscles in his chest work as he lifted. "Yeah, exercise is important..." Unconsciously I licked my lips.

Seeing that Mark laughed. "See somethin ya like?"

My head dropped and I smiled. "Always."

Setting the bar back in its cradle he sat up, wiping his chest with the towel and breathing a little hard. "That burns..." He flexed his biceps and chest.

"Looks good though," I sighed softly.

"Good..." he grinned.

Scrambling to my feet I walked to stand behind him and smoothed my hands down over his shoulders. "Yeah, I definitely like what I see."

Grunting contentedly Mark leaned back into me. "That's nice..."

Exerting a little more pressure I started to work the muscles gently. "Good huh?"

"Mmmm hmmm..." He let his eyes drop closed as I worked the lactic acid out of his muscles, finishing with his shoulders and leaning in close to work my way down his chest.

"This is fun..."

"Even more fun from this angle..." Leaning back he rested his head on my shoulder.

Chuckling I dropped a kiss on his temple. "I'm perfectly content here."

Mark reached up and locked his fingers behind my shoulders, kissing the side of my jaw. "You wanna go swimmin?"

"Sounds like fun."

"Alright then..." Standing up he stretched then headed for the stairs again.

Grinning, I followed along behind. "So we have a whole day and night to ourselves?"

He tossed a towel at me. "Yes we do..." With a huge grin he snaked an arm around my waist and kissed me.

"I really think I like the sound of that." Pulling away I darted off to change and came back out to find him.

"I know I do..." he commented as I returned, swatting me with his towel and then headed out to the back yard, dropping the towel and diving into the deep end. I watched him surface and dropped my towel with his, diving in nearby and swimming up close to wrap my arms around him. Holding on to me he lifted up his feet, effectively dunking the pair of us.

Spluttering indignantly as I surfaced again I swatted him on the shoulder and grumbled. "Big lump…" In reply he just burst out laughing and choked on pool water. "Serves you right," I observed, glaring at him. Finally getting the coughing under control he returned to laughing then splashed me and darted off to the shallow end. I lagged along behind, complaining about the difference in length of arms and legs. "Not fair…"

"C'mon darlin... cut me some slack. With my size, I'm lucky I float at all."

Nodding, I edged away from him just a little. "True... you are a big Texan lump..."

A wet eyebrow was raised in my direction. "You wanna start insulting heritage?" I declined to answer, just grinning at him from the far side of the pool. "I ain't the one who almost died eatin chilli..."

A grimace crossed my face. "That is not food... Besides, you'd struggle if you'd not eaten it before."

"Hey, at least it tastes like somethin..."

"Even if my taste buds will never work properly again... Anyway, we share a little heritage."

"Irish..." He smiled over at me.

"Yep. Just enough to stop me being boringly English." Instead of replying he swished through the water and ducked underneath to sweep me off my feet, making me squeak and desperately try not to inhale water. Mark emerged and lifted me out of the water, laughing. "Bully," I grumbled, glaring at him.

"I am not..."

Feeling a sudden childish streak I stuck my tongue out at him. "Are too..."

"You only say that because I can throw you around and I'm too big for you to manhandle," he retorted with a grin.

"I got you on your knees once..."

The smile faded from his face. "Won't do it twice..."

"I might yet."

Mark leant towards me in the water. "S'ok... we'll cross that bridge when we come to it." Grinning once more he laid back to float lazily. "This is so the life..."

Smiling softly I watched him, leaning against the side of the pool. "Does make a nice change. I love my job, but sometimes it would be great to just be able to relax for a bit."

"When you're ready to be a kept woman, just c'mon home and don't leave again." He chuckled quietly. "Vince'll get over it."

I snorted a laugh. "I'd never be a kept woman."

Mark cracked open an eye to glance over as he floated. "Could be... if ya wanted to."

My head was shaking before he even finished speaking. "I've always worked, always paid my own way. I may not have a lot but it's all mine, all bought and paid for. I couldn't be kept. I like to feel useful too much."

"Oh I'd make sure you're useful..."

Pulling a face I splashed at him. "I'd like to have a little more purpose in life than that... If that was all I was going to do I could have done it back home."

"But not for me..." Floating over to me he grabbed the back of my head in one huge palm and kissed me hard.

I gave myself to it happily for a while and then pulled back. "And that would make it different, huh?" I asked with a grin.

"Of course it does..."

Once again I shook my head. "Nope, I'm a worker. I can do my best while I'm here though..." As I spoke my fingers trailed through the water drops on his arm.

"One thing I have learned… Work if you have to. If ya don't? Enjoy the hell out of it."

Leaning back a little I looked around at my surroundings. "Great if you can afford it."

Mark ran a wet hand down the side of my face. "Guess what darlin, we can..."

Despite trying to concentrate on the conversation I couldn't stop my head from tilting into his hand. "You can. I can't."

The look he gave me was incredulous. "Where do you live woman?"

I nodded, acknowledging his point. "Yeah, I live here now. Doesn't change anything else though." Mark just shook his head and dived under the water, emerging on the other side. "Just because I live here doesn't mean I have a claim on anything else, and that includes your money. Especially your money."

"Whatever..." He shook his head. "Do it however you wanna darlin. The offer's always here. Now c'mere." My head lifted at the change in his tone and I slogged through the water towards him, smiling when he settled back against the pool steps and lifted me onto his lap. "Mmm... much better." He kissed me softly then trailed down over my chin to my throat. My head fell back as I gave a contented groan. "So... are we gonna do anything special tonight since we're without kid?"

Sitting up I ran a finger down his chest. "I have no idea. I know you muttered something about the leftover frosting," I observed with a laugh.

Mark watched my finger as it circled over his skin. "I did didn't I?"

My hand dropped further to trace the letters tattooed on his stomach. "Yep, you certainly did."

Underneath my weight his hips shifted up a little as he grinned at me. "We... could..."

An answering smile went over my face as I leaned forward to run my tongue along his collarbone. "I guess so..." He shivered under my ministrations and dropped his head back to wet his hair again as I worked my way back along his collarbone, across the base of his neck and then repeated the action on the other side.

"C'mon darlin... I don't feel like swimmin anymore." Chuckling, he nipped at the side of my neck.

In retaliation I nipped the top of his shoulder. "I wasn't thinking about swimming..." As I spoke I shifted on his lap.

"I damn sure am not anymore." With an evil looking smirk he pressed his hips into me.

The implication made me shiver and gasp, leaning in closer to him. "It's been such a long time..."

Mark arched his back, his hands sliding down my ribs to settle on my hips. "Oh god yes it has."

The tone of his voice cut right through me and I pulled myself closer so that my groin rested over his. "I want you, now." With a growl low in his throat he pulled me to himself hard to show jut how much he agreed with that sentiment. The very though made me gasp and shiver once more, grinding myself down against him. Mark slid his hands up to my shoulders and peeled the wet bathing suit down my arms to expose my breasts and leant in to lick the hollow of my throat. A soft moan came from low in my throat as I dragged my nails down his chest, making him hiss as he lifted me up to get the rest of my bathing suit off of me. Stepping out of it hurriedly I reached to get him naked too, smiling to myself when he lifted his hips to help me out.

Once we were both naked I ran my hands back up his legs, skimming the inside of his thighs with my fingers and trailing my tongue up his chest. Mark growled again and latched onto my hips, pulling me forward and thrusting up in one smooth motion until he was deeply seated inside me. An explosive breath was forced out of me and my head dropped forward to rest against his collarbone. Gently Mark wrapped his arms around my back, cradling me to him as he worked himself slowly. In many ways this was how I liked him best. The whole world saw his displays of power in the ring. It was only me that saw him like this, soft and loving in a way that was still almost unexpected to me when I looked at the sheer size of him.

Almost as soon as he started moving my breathing became harsh and my hips started to move almost as if of their own volition, complimenting his rhythm. "Jesus Mark…" Completely unable to find the words to say how I was feeling I leant in to kiss him almost desperately.

"God I missed ya darlin…" he grunted, letting his head fall back and picking up his pace as he cupped the weight of my breasts in his hands. Groaning harshly I pushed forward into his touch. Mark picked up his rhythm, his lips trailing over my wet skin wherever he could reach. My hands ran restlessly over his chest, nails lightly scratching over his chest as I matched his movements. With another grunt Mark dropped his head back again, letting his hair splay around him in the water while his fingers dug into my hips and he let me ride him. I leaned back a little, steadying myself with my hands on his shoulders and worked hard, my muscles shaking with the sheer effort. "God darlin, you're so beautiful like this," he gasped, letting his eyes roll back into his head with the sensation.

I started to shudder and my rhythm degraded as my orgasm started to build deep within me. Mark picked up where I was losing it and gritted his teeth, looking as if he was walking the edge of losing it himself. My fingers gripped onto his shoulders convulsively, little cries being forced from my throat as it crashed over me. Mark watched me in awe as I climaxed then started to shudder, giving himself entirely to the moment. It was all I could do to prop myself up with my hands on his chest, my head hanging as I heaved for breath.

Beneath me Mark panted, running his hands idly up and down my arms then he suddenly started laughing. "I'm gonna have to have the pool boy out to clean it."

A surprised snort escaped me before I collapsed onto his chest as I started to laugh. "Fuck's sake, Mark..." He simply giggled harder and rubbed my wet hair. "I'm never going to look at this pool the same way..." I sighed contentedly.

"Me neither... I will however grin at it when I walk by." Chuckling he kissed my temple.

Relaxing against him I rubbed a hand softly over his chest. "This is so nice..."

Releasing a happy sigh he nodded and let his eyes close. "Mmm hmmm..."

"Shame I can't negotiate more time off. I wouldn't mind a hell of a lot more of that." Grinning up at him I nipped his shoulder playfully.

Mark jerked at the sensation and splashed me. "You could..." he said with a grin. "Just stay..."

Even as my eyes rolled I smiled. "Didn't we just have this conversation?"

Mark sighed petulantly. "I know..."

I sat back upright to look at him. "In some ways I'd love nothing more than to be able to stay here but I have to make a living."

It was Mark's turn to roll his eyes. "Til ya get bored. Then you can come hang out with me all the time."

I had to chuckle at his persistence. "I don't do it because I'm bored. I need to have a job, to feel useful."

Mark shifted me suddenly so he was pinning me against the pool steps, his face nearly brushing mine. "I'll make ya useful..."

It was a struggle not to react to his closeness. "Oh yeah? How?"

Smirking to himself he swished backwards, floating away from me on his back. "My laundry needs doin..."

"I'm not going to dignify that with a response." Crossing my arms I affected an annoyed expression although I wasn't too sure how effective it was.

He laughed, pleased with himself, then curled over to duck underwater and emerge beside me again. "What do ya say we get out today?"

"Sounds interesting. What did you have in mind?"

Mark flipped his wet hair back out of his face and shrugged. "I dunno... go for a ride I guess. Get some coffee on the way somewhere maybe..."

"Just relax and see where we get to? Sounds fantastic." Moving closer to him I brushed the last clinging strands of hair from his face.

With a loving smile he kissed me before slogging out of the water naked and heading back to the house. Making the most of it I watched from the pool for as long as possible before dragging myself out to follow him. He was already in the shower by the time I got there, washing the chlorine from his hair. His mood seemed to have dropped and I knew what was on his mind. It was never far from his thoughts in those days – his upcoming retirement.

Stepping close to him under the water I rinsed off quickly and rested my forehead against his chest. "Can't say I'm thrilled about it, but it's going to have to happen somewhen. You've got Amber now and your joints are definitely not loving it any more."

Mark leant back against the hot tiles and held me to himself. "I know... I'd do anything for Amber..."

"No one knows that better than I do. This is for her really."

Kissing my forehead he sighed. "It's only for her."

After snuggling against his chest for a second I stood up. "It's enough of a reason."

With a slightly forlorn looking nod he stepped out of the shower. "C'mon, we're losin daylight."

Getting out myself I wrapped a towel around my body as an idea came to me suddenly. "You could always open a school if you miss it so much."

Mark's head snapped up. "I... could couldn't I?"

"You'd have no shortage of people wanting you to train them."

He brightened significantly and pulled me to him, kissing me hard. "You're a damn miracle you know that?"

"I have my moments," I replied with a smile. Mark didn't answer, just swatted me on the behind and walked towards the bedroom to get dressed. Chuckling to myself I followed to do the same. Mark was dressed quickly and waited for me impatiently, tying a blue bandana around his head then virtually bouncing on the balls of his feet as I finished up.

"Alright alright... I'm done..." I muttered, tying back my still wet hair.

Mark shrugged into a leather vest and threw me a smile, heading for the garage. "You gonna ride with me or take your own?"

"I know how much you hate mine so I'll stick with you for once."

With a deep chuckle he shook his head. "I don't hate it. It just looks like a toy to me." I could almost see his point as he swung his leg over a big Titan.

"Besides, this way I get to have my hands on you all the time..." Grinning, I hopped on behind him.

Grunting happily he started the engine. "Hang on tight." Dropping the bike into gear he tore down the driveway and out onto the open road.


	37. Chapter 37

Later that day we returned home, Mark chattering all the while about the idea of running a wrestling school that I had put into his head. All I could do was nod and grin at his enthusiasm, the most he had shown about anything for some time. He was still in full flow when I heard my cell phone ringing in the living room and ran to grab it, pressing the button to listen to the voicemail someone had left for me. Mark, finally quiet, leant against the wall with his arms folded and his ankles crossed as he watched me listen.

Wincing, I rolled my eyes. "Oh, he is just loving this…" Mark cocked his head, giving me a questioning look as I dropped the phone back on the side table. "Glen. Looks like I picked up his watch in my gear somehow.

Mark snorted and dropped onto the couch. "If it'd been his PS2 you'd have had about twenty five messages by now."

"He tried ringing the apartment first and wants to know why the phone line is disconnected."

"Probably shoulda told him about that..."

"Last time I spoke to him I didn't know it would be. He's guessed where I am though and is gloating about being right." My eyes rolled again. "I don't have to tell you how unbearable he can be when he's right."

Mark chuckled slightly. "Yeah he can..." Shifting slightly he dropped a boot on the coffee table. "What uh... what'd he say?"

"Something along the lines of 'I told you so' several times." Sighing I dropped on to the couch next to him.

Immediately he snaked an arm round behind me. "What'd you all talk about?"

I puffed out a breath. "What happened a bit, and what he thinks is going to happen now."

Mark's head dropped to his chest. "Good lord... Doctor fuckin Glen..." Snorting he looked over at me. "I knew I caught him watchin Dr. Phil..."

"I did tell you the day I got back he had theories."

"What sort of theories..."

A rueful chuckle escaped me. "For starters he told me it would be no time at all before you had me moving in here full time."

His eyebrows shot up to his hairline. "Uh huh... what else?"

Suddenly a little uncomfortable I shifted in my seat. "He... uh... seems to think you'll want more kids."

Mark stared blankly at me for a moment. "I uh... never thought about it."

Trying to adopt my normal attitude of ignoring it and hoping it would go away I shrugged a little. "Like I said, that's his opinion."

"I mean... I'm not gettin any younger..." he blustered slightly. "I came from a big family... and I guess I thought I might like one too but... once everything with Sara went to shit I sorta dropped it."

"So... essentially he's right..."

Mark blushed. "Yeah... he sorta is..."

I sighed softly, realising it wasn't going to be dropped just like that. "I told him I have views on kids. There are pretty strong restrictions on when I'd have them."

He echoed my sigh. "I'm not sayin let's have an army tomorrow..." The couch creaked under his weight as he leaned back.

Resolved now to having this conversation I turned to face him, tucking one leg underneath me. "The same restrictions apply to one or four. I've never planned to have kids. I've never really seriously thought about it at all."

"And I'm not sayin I'm dead set on more either. Amber's my angel... that's all I need."

I nodded, staring into the middle distance. "That's simple then."

Mark frowned at the look on my face. "What... talk to me..."

I shook my head and looked at him. "Nothing. I was just miles away."

Not necessarily convinced, he nodded slowly. "Besides, I'm not in the habit of knockin up my girlfriends." Gently he grazed my cheek with his knuckle. "I do have some honour... If we're ever gonna broach this subject, you'd have to marry me." The statement was ended with a grin.

No answering smile showed on my face as I looked up at him seriously. "Yes, I would."

"So it's settled then... No kids... not now..." His attempt at a nonchalant shrug came out as looking somewhat guarded. "One day at a time..."

I settled back into the couch. "Yeah..."

Mark frowned again. "What's goin on in that head of yours darlin? I'm not stupid..."

"That was the last subject that came up."

"With Glen?"

I nodded. "He's easy to talk to. If I need to talk to someone out there it's him now."

To give him his due Mark did his best not to show how relieved he was at that statement. "He's always been a good friend to me... He's very... insightful."

One of my resolves ever since coming off the drink and drugs had been to be as honest as I could with Mark. With everything I had done to give him little reason to trust me, it was as if I was trying to fight my way back somehow. With this in mind I glanced at him warily. "I do still see Dave and talk to him a bit but not like I used to. Besides, Glen knows you pretty well."

"Givin out my secrets is he?"

I shook my head. "No, no secrets. Just advice and opinions."

"He tell ya I'm a miserable old redneck with no manners and a taste for too much Jack?" Mark grinned forlornly.

A quiet chuckle was forced from me. "You might have expected that, but no." Taking a deep breath I became serious again as I looked over at him. "He also seems to think you'd want to marry me."

A slow grin worked its way over his face as he pulled me into his side. "Maybe..."

Snorting derisively I shoved at him, laughing. "Are you even capable of giving a straight answer, Calaway?"

A playfully injured look was my answer. "Of course I am..." He laughed. "I just like bein cryptic with you. You're so damn cute when you're frustrated."

Grumbling I crossed my arms over my chest and tried to look affronted. "Spend most of my time like that round you..."

Mark looked thoroughly pleased with himself. "I like ya cute."

"Easily solved. I just won't rise to the bait..."

"Oh I dunno about that... I can be very very irritating."

Determinedly I shook my head. "Nope... I can resist." No sooner were the words out of my mouth that he poked me in the forehead. Shifting slightly in my seat I did the best I could to ignore him but he simply did it again. Just in time I caught myself beginning to frown but it wasn't soon enough to stop him seeing it and, grinning merrily to himself, he hovered his finger just between my eyes. Giving in with no grace at all I growled at him. "If you want to get laid any time soon you'd better pack it in..."

Mark burst out laughing and bowled me over onto the couch. "Like you could refuse me baby girl..." To reinforce his point he rubbed his goatee against the side of my neck.

Shivering furiously I protested. "I could try..." Even to myself I sounded totally unconvincing.

He continued chucking mirthfully. "You know what they say... tryin is half the battle..."

"Arrogant git..."

"You love me..." Gently he nuzzled against my jaw.

A soft sigh escaped my lips. "Oh yes... I do."

Mark kissed me softly then glanced down at his watch. "I wanna call and say g'night to Amber... Be right back..." As he stood and headed for the kitchen I sat back, grabbing the remote and flipping through the channels although I was totally distracted from whatever was on the screen. A couple of minutes later he came back, the cordless phone to his ear, and sat next to me. "Of course angel face... hang on." I was startled when he thrust the phone towards me, grinning. "She doesn't wanna talk to me..."

I had a quick conversation with Amber, hearing all about the toy monkey that Katherine had got for her and the ride they had taken on the Ferris wheel, then handed the phone back to Mark and listened while he said goodnight. As he put the phone down he turned to me, smiling broadly.

"I think I'm gonna have my hands full with both of you here."

My eyebrow quirked up at him. "And why is that?"

"She's taken quite a liking to ya darlin."

"She's easy to get along with."

"She gets that from me ya know..." He chuckled happily even as I stared at him incredulously.

"Yeah, right..." I laughed.

"You're breakin my heart baby girl..." Shoving me playfully he stood and headed towards the kitchen again.

"Yeah, I can tell the ego is suffering..."

He returned with a slab of cake and collapsed beside me. "This is damn good..."

I eyed the piece which looked to be about a quarter of what I remembered making. "Is there any left?"

Still chewing he stared at me. "Of course there is... there was half a damn cake in there."

"I was just going to say if there wasn't I'd make another one tomorrow. Use up the frosting."

"Don't you dare..." A sidelong smirk crossed his face as he finished the cake and then kissed me, pressing me back into the couch as I returned it hard, pushing towards him as hard as I could until he pulled back and laughed, wiping some frosting from my cheek. "So we've got the night to ourselves..."

The feel of the icing on my face made me grimace a little, more at his inner child than anything else as I watched him lick it off his finger. "So we have..."

"So what should we do with it?"

Contemplating I looked up at the ceiling for a moment. "Run naked round the house and swing from the curtain rails?" I sniggered.

His long frame stretched lazily. "I can try but I dunno if my hips can take all that swingin and runnin..."

Slowly I trailed a hand down his arm. "What did you have in mind?"

Mark shrugged but an evil little grin was showing. "Got plans for that frosting..."

Even without any more details than that my breathing rate started to kick right up as I fought to keep the tremors out of my voice. "Are you going to enlighten me?"

Suddenly he stood, pulling me to my feet with him. "C'mon..." Grabbing my hand he tugged me to our bedroom and gave me a soft shove down onto the bed. "Just be undressed by the time I get back here." Without another word he turned and left the room, leaving me staring after him. I knew I shouldn't do it but I was such a fool for him, so totally in love that I would do just about anything he wanted. Especially if it was going to lead to where I had an idea it would. Mark chuckled as he returned complete with the bowl of frosting and found me sitting naked on the end of the bed. "Ya know, I expected you to put up more of a fight."

"You were the one telling me I can't resist you."

"And ya proved me right." Setting the bowl on the bedside table he put a knee on the bed beside me and pushed me back into the mattress to kiss me. Eagerly I lifted my head to meet him, my hands resting on either side of his neck as he dropped his weight down onto me and grunted happily against my lips. Squirming slightly to get myself comfortable I rubbed my palms down over his shoulders, grinning against his mouth as he flexed his muscles under my exploring hands then wrapped his arms around me and hauled me up the bed. "Get comfy…" Reluctant to lose touch with him even for an instant I dug the tips of my fingers into his pecs before doing as he instructed.

Standing up Mark pulled his shirt over his head in one quick movement before sitting beside me, his fingers trailing gently along my shoulder and arm. The almost tickling sensation made me hiss even as my eyes roved freely over him. Leaning slightly away from me he picked up a little bit of the frosting on his fingertip and held it to my lips. Obediently I licked it off then closed my mouth over his finger, running my tongue over the tip.

"Mmm... that's nice..." Smiling he removed the bandana from his forehead and tied it over my eyes. "Be quiet now..." With a feather light touch the tips of his fingers grazed along the line of my jaw.

My body jerked as my sight was taken from me, limbs going stiff with a sudden nervousness. "What..."

Before I could finish the question he leant over and kissed me. "Shhh..." A sudden cold sensation dropped onto my shoulder followed by warmth as he dropped some frosting on my skin and licked it off with slow strokes of the flat of his tongue. Again I jumped, my head turning towards him as I came out in goose bumps. A fresh wave arrived as he blew a soft breath over my damp skin.

A breathy chuckle sounded close to my ear as he traced my collar bone and sternum with more frosting. "Who needs cake huh?" He followed the line with his tongue and I felt the bed move as he reached for more frosting.

"That's nice..."

"Uh huh..." He moved closer and licked gently at my lips, kissing me passionately when I lifted my head in search of his mouth, his fingers tracing slow shapes on my breasts. My body arched up into his hands as I kissed him back furiously, his palms cupping me as he kissed me harder and stretched out beside me. Now he was in easy reaching distance I reached out, running my hand up and down the hard expanse of his stomach, encouraged by the contented noises he made as he teased my nipples into tight little peaks and moved on to trace idle patterns on my stomach with more frosting.

As he again brushed over a ticklish spot the tip of my tongue poked through my teeth only to disappear quickly when he pulled the bandana free and I could look down my body at him, hissing sharply at the combination of feeling his tongue cleaning what he'd created and seeing what he was doing.

Mark looked up at me as he lapped the chocolate from my stomach and grinned. "Look like fun?"

I licked my lips. "Mmm... Do I get a go?"

"You want one?"

Once more I allowed my eyes to travel over his body. "Uh huh..."

Quickly he sat up on his knees. "C'mon then."

There was no need to tell me twice and I got to my knees as well, reaching for some frosting. I saw him smirk but he never moved a muscle as I smeared the sticky substance down one side of his chest and started to lick it off. His eyes burned into me however as he watched my every move, seeming to be savouring the feel of my tongue on his skin.

Finishing the job I licked my lips again. "Tastes better this way..." Reaching for more I moved down to his stomach.

Mark leaned backwards, bracing himself on his hands. "Yeah it does... I like the taste of you better." Busy as I was I simply smiled my agreement and bent to my task with short darting strokes. Mark gave a grunt of pleasure and ran a hand through my hair as I ran my tongue up from his belly to the base of his neck, then smeared some more up the side of his neck. Chuckling he swiped at it and smeared it over my chest instead before lifting himself up and over me, pushing me back down onto the bed to lick at it as I had done to him. The feel of his tongue on me again made me shudder, a soft groan coming from me.

"Definitely better off of you..." Again he reached; smearing haphazardly across my chest and stomach, his actions become more heated than before, less deliberate. Helplessly I arched up towards his mouth, groaning again.

Mark cleaned a little more chocolate from me then rose up suddenly, panting and fighting with his belt. That had me sitting up and reaching out to help him, my breathing harsh. His hands dropped as he let me work, a glint in his eye as he saw the fierce look in my eyes. The belt went quickly, the buttons of his jeans soon undone as well and I dragged the denim from him almost roughly in my enthusiasm, running my tongue up the front of one hip. Mark finished kicking the jeans from his legs and descended upon me, showering me with kisses and licks and smearing the frosting between us. Growling deep in my throat I gave him the same treatment.

Suddenly he rolled onto his back, his hand on his face and broke out laughing, pointing at my face. "Oops..."

I swiped at my cheek and looked at the chocolate on my fingers for a few seconds before grinning and wiping it down his cheek, sniggering madly at the childishness. Mark gasped and reached for the bowl, getting a good dollop and getting me clear in the face with it. Incredulously I stared at him then went for the bowl with both hands and gave it to him full in the face. Spluttering indignantly he pressed his face close to mine and kissed me wildly, covering us both in the gloop. Beyond caring I wrapped my arms around him and held on tightly. Laughing wildly he tried to pull away but his hands kept slipping. Echoing his laughter I clung tightly with my legs as well, refusing to allow him to escape.

"Woman! I'm all sticky!" Bursting out in a fresh wave of laughter he rolled over, trapping me underneath him. All I could do was laugh with him. Finally he managed to fight free a little and grabbed my wrists, holding them over my head as he shoved my thighs apart with his knees and dropped down to rest against me.

The atmosphere changed suddenly as I fought against him a little and snarled up at him. A wild smile was on his face but there was a definite fierceness in his eyes. "We're a fuckin mess..." Panting he dropped his head to kiss me as he pushed himself into me with an angling of his hips. My body rolled up to meet him and I hooked my legs behind his thighs. Mark gasped and trailed the tip of his tongue slowly up my cheek, pulling back and sliding in again. With another snarl I bucked up hard to meet him, a thrill going through me as he growled at the inference in my actions and again pulled back, this time slamming into me hard. I threw my head back into the pillows, grunting harshly and throwing my hips up to meet his again.

Mark bared his teeth and set a furious pace, releasing my wrists to brace himself against the pillows. Fighting to stay with him I raked my nails hard down his back. Throwing his head back he snarled as the pain shot through his back and shifted up to his knees, holding my hips against his as he thrust deep and hard.

"Oh... god..." Helpless to move against his strength I started to pant heavily.

"Ah Fuck Jade..." I could feel him fighting not to bite down as he dropped his head to my shoulder. I was really beyond caring by that point however and dug my nails into his forearms, my lips drawing back from my teeth. Mark started to shudder against me, his muscles no longer directly obeying his commands. My head darted forward and I bit him sharply at the junction of his neck and shoulder. "C'mon Jade... I can't..." In response to the plea in his voice I wound myself tight against him and angled my hips for maximum sensation. Groaning hard it was my turn to start shuddering underneath him. He gritted his teeth and panted against my neck. "That's... it..."

One final buck against him finished me off and I held myself rigid, trembling wildly and giving a choked little cry. Mark fell into a shuddering heap and pulled me down with him, our bodies still joined as his body jerked wildly in waves. Every spasm he went through sent another wave of sensation through me, my face pressed hard into his neck.

"Good... God... what the... hell was that?" he panted, fighting to regain his breath.

"That... was amazing..."

He buried his face in my neck and started to chuckle. "And... messy..."

Shifting slightly I grimaced. "Eww, sticky..." Mark burst into a full throated laugh, leaving my vainly trying to look affronted but giving up and cracking up with him.

"C'mon... shower again..." Still chuckling he attempted to hoist himself off the bed and failed miserably, falling backward again.

It was almost as much as I could do to drag myself to sit on the edge of the bed. "I think I might have bruises..."

"Me too..." Finally he succeeded in lifting himself, his hand going to his hip as he grimaced. Ignoring the fact that I was wobbling slightly too I eyed him concernedly as I got to my feet as well. Mark steadied me with a hand on my arm and then looked down at the bed. "Aw damn..."

Following his eye line I burst out laughing. "Guess we'll have to do something with that..."

He ran a hand through his hair, grimacing when it stuck in the chocolate. "Later..." Turning on his heel he headed for the bathroom, leaving me shaking my head at the mess we had made before following him. By the time I got there the water was running and he was in there already.

"We're so screwed up..." I laughed as I stepped in behind him. In reply he simply grunted and grabbed a rag to start getting the frosting off me, making me sigh happily. "But it seems to work."

"Yes it does..." Grinning, he mopped at his own face until I snatched the cloth from him to get the bits he'd missed. Content to let me work he just rested his arms on the shower wall. "This is nice..." I just made an assenting noise and continued amusing myself exploring his body with the rag, smiling softly when he shivered under my touch.

Reluctantly I eventually dropped the cloth. "All done..." Not wanting to stop touching him I let my fingers trail down his back. Mark took me by the shoulders and spun me round, grunting and removing a spot of chocolate we'd missed. Shuddering slightly at the memory I grinned up at him. "That was... different..."

"Different? Yeah I can't remember bathing myself in frosting before."

"Had a hell of an effect though."

He let out a low breath. "Oh God yes..." Smiling gently he kissed me. "You should bake more often."

"Maybe I will, when I'm home."

Moving again with that speed all of his own he trapped me against the shower wall with his arms. "You ARE home."

I looked up at him and ran my hands up his chest to his shoulders. "Yes... I am."

Again he smiled and kissed me. "Speaking of that... we should go get your stuff one of these days."

Nodding I dropped my head back against the wall. "Yeah. Shouldn't take long though."

"Tomorrow then, before Momma brings Amber home."

"Sounds good to me. Better go and do something with this bed if we want to sleep..."


	38. Chapter 38

Those few days back home in Houston went far too quickly and I soon found myself stood alongside Mark, waiting for the boarding call to start our European tour. Amber sat in his arms, head tucked into his shoulder as it was far too early for her to be anywhere near functional. After glancing for what must have been the tenth time at the flight information monitors I stretched and sighed, turning to Mark.

"You'd think I'd be used to waiting around in airports now."

"I sure don't miss it." With a gentle touch he moved a strand of hair out of my face. "Gonna miss you though."

My head tipped towards his hand as I made the most of his touch. "Me too. It's not so long before you're back with us for a while though."

He nodded slowly in reply. "True..." Shifting Amber more comfortably on his hip he looked around the terminal. "I don't know if I'm gonna miss it or not." Softly he stroked Amber's hair to quiet her as she grumbled sleepily at being disturbed. "I wouldn't miss this for the world though." The smile on his faced was tinged with a little sadness.

"It'll be yours for good soon. And mine when I'm home."

His smile brightened. "And you'll be mine too." Leaning over he kissed me. "All mine."

I rested the back of my hand against his cheek. "Wherever I am, I'm always all yours."

Despite my reassuring words he gave a non-committal grunt but pulled me to him, hugging me tight to him. "God I wish you didn't have to go."

Carefully I rested my forehead on the opposite shoulder to where Amber dozed. "This is what I do big guy."

"I know..." he sighed. "This is how we met but that doesn't mean I have to like you goin off without me. You won't even have Glen pal around with this trip."

A quiet laugh came from me at that. "That's going to be weird. I've got so used to being with him that it's almost like going into it new all over again."

"Call me anytime. I don't care about the time difference. You need me, you call me. Okay?"

Smiling, I went up on my tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "I will."

A chuckle rumbled deep in his chest as he pulled me to him again. "Ya know, I never had this problem leavin Sara..."

"It's easier to leave than be the one left behind I guess. Although I'm nowhere near as keen as I used to be to get on the road, especially so far away from home."

I felt him shudder as he stifled another chuckle. "Least you have your family."

A grimace crossed my face at his amusement. "Yeah, I can sit and listen to them talk about the middle aged thug I live with." It was my turn to fight a giggle.

"You tell em this middle-aged thug loves you more than life and if they've got anything to say about it, I can arrange a trip for them." A devious look that I didn't trust an inch came into his eyes, making me burst out laughing.

"I don't trust that face at all. No plotting against my family while I'm gone."

"I'll plot on whoever I wanna plot on woman." He smiled broadly. "You can't stop me from thinkin yet. Ain't even married and she's training me..." Playfully he rolled his eyes.

Responding to his lighter tone I shoved at him lightly. "Yeah yeah... like I could ever get you trained."

"You know what they say about old dogs little girl..."

"I like your tricks just fine the way they are."

Amber's head suddenly shot up. "Daddy... I have to go to the bathroom..."

"Can ya wait til we get Jade on the plane sweet pea?"

She looked at him insistently. "Now..."

Quickly I glanced up at the board to check on progress. "Go on... there's a while yet."

Setting her down on her feet he rolled his eyes. "Alright, c'mon ya monster..." Swivelling his head around to look for a restroom sign he started to move away. "Be right back."

Smiling I waved them away, going to lean against the wall and wait. The movement of a large figure near the check in desk caught my eye as it always did through force of habit by then and I looked over to see Dave checking in. Shouldering his carry on bag when he was done he looked around and spotted me over by the wall, giving me a wave. Grinning I waved back and watched him walk over.

"So you're back huh?"

"Yeah... the time off for good behaviour is over. Besides, who else can keep you lot in line in Europe?"

Chuckling he shoved his hands in his pockets. "Karen has been pulling her hair out and cursing your very existence since you left. I think she might just need the help."

My head ducked as I laughed. "My name has been mud huh?"

"In her mind at least." Shifting his bag on his shoulder he smiled down at me. "It's been... lonely without you around Jade."

"No one to terrorise the roster with you?" An answering smile crossed my face.

The look he gave me seemed almost faraway. "No one to talk to..."

I patted him on the shoulder. "Well, I'm back now."

The million dollar smile appeared on his face again as he pulled me in for a hug. "I'm not the only one who's missed you."

"I missed you guys as well."

Sighing he stepped back and grinned. "Yep, the cruiserweights don't have anywhere near as much fun torturing Karen. She just gets frustrated and cries."

Indignantly I planted my fists on my hips. "I can see I'm going to have to whip them back into shape..."

"Of course you are. I think they're doing it deliberately just so you'll have your work cut out for you when you get back."

Laughing I shook my head. "You'd think they'd have learned by now that they'll never get the better of me."

Dave burst into a full throated laugh. "I dunno, they had you goin pretty good before when..."

"Jade?" Mark's voice came from behind me suddenly.

Quickly I turned round. "Hey... that was quick." A smile was on my face but it felt strained, unnatural. Even though I wasn't really doing anything wrong, just talking to one of my charges, the effects of what had happened could be clearly felt there in that airport terminal.

Mark looked us both over then hugged Amber close to his leg. "She wants to be able to say g'bye to you as much as I do."

Nodding I turned back to Dave. "I'll see you on the plane. Need to do the goodbye thing."

"Yeah..." Dave looked at Mark. "So you'll be around after the UK tour huh?"

"Yep..." Although he answered Dave civilly enough I could see him staring hard, tension written clearly in his body language.

I glanced from one man to the other then looked to Dave again. "I'll catch you later..."

"Uh... yeah... See you there." He held out his hand to Mark. "I promise, you have nothing to worry about... from either of us..."

Mark looked sceptical but shook his hand. "Have a good trip man." Dave nodded and headed off leaving me sighing a little and staring at the floor, hating the awkwardness of the situation. He spotted a vending machine a few feet away and gave Amber a dollar. "Why don't you go get yourself somethin to munch on sweet pea... I can see ya from here." As she grabbed the money and bounded off I dragged my eyes up to meet his. "I'm not worried..." His voice didn't sound the slightest bit convincing.

"I know I've done nothing to deserve it but this is only going to work if you trust me Mark."

"I know..." He sighed again. "I know baby girl... It's just..." It seemed that he couldn't finish his thought.

"Damn near impossible?" Awkwardly I shifted on my feet.

Mark seemed to deflate a bit and pulled me hard to him. "I love you beautiful. You have no idea how much. You might think you do but you don't. I'm just afraid you're gonna realize I'm not what you want and disappear forever." As he reached the end of the sentence he seemed to almost choke up.

"Mark, you're temperamental, abrasive and judgemental but you're mine and that's all I want, now and always. There is no one else for me now." I waved a hand to take in the terminal around us. "Not here, not anywhere."

Closing his eyes he buried his face in my hair. "It's scary Jade... for me... and that's not somethin I'm good at admitting."

Softly I rested a hand on the back of his neck. "What can I do to let you know I'm always going to be here? In spirit, even if not in body."

Mark shook his head and stood back up, trying to wipe nonchalantly at his eyes. "Nothin you can do. This is just me and something I'm gonna have to get over."

"All the while I have this job I'm going to have to do this but whenever I can I'll be home. Even if it's only for a day or two I'll be home."

Looking over, he saw Amber still agonizing over her choice of candy then turned back to me. "When this tour is over, I'll be here waiting. No question about that."

"And then you're with us for a while. For the last hurrah." I grimaced at the idea. "You know, the fan in me hates that... a lot." I smiled sadly. "The rest of me is a little sad that I'm going to have to get used to doing this."

He chuckled. "The 20 year old kid in me hates it too." "When I got into that class way back when I was sure I'd be doin it til I dropped over dead in the ring."

"I used to think you would too. But... both me and your daughter like you in one piece..." Rubbing at his hip absently he grumbled. Growling playfully I hugged in close to him, grinning. "I especially like you in working order."

His gaze became a leer as he caught my meaning. "For you, I'll always work... Always..."

Just as he leant in to kiss me Amber jumped onto his leg. "DADDY! Look what I got!!"

Mark rolled his eyes at her timing and crouched down. "Ooh, chocolate. Looks like we're gonna be busy today." Looking up at me he grimaced.

I was forced to fight an enormous grin. "Good luck with the sugar hyped kiddo..." Glancing at the board again I sighed hard. "Nearly out of time."

Mark's smile faded as he got back to his feet. "Yeah, I know. I was just pretending..."

"I'll call as soon as we're sorted at the other end."

"Yeah, good. I'll be waiting." A frown came over his face as the boarding call for my flight was announced. "Better get on..."

Sighing again I leaned up to kiss him. "Yeah, I'd better go."

Amber wormed her way in to the hug as well. "Don't be gone long... I love you Jade!"

Wrapping my arms around both of them tightly I nodded. "Yeah, I love you too shortstuff." The second boarding call came far too quickly for my liking. "Okay... I really do have to go now."

Mark kissed me one last time, his thumb trailing down over my cheek. "Yeah, ya do. See you soon okay?"

Smiling, I turned my head to kiss his hand. "I'll call the second I'm free."

"Can't wait..." Reaching down he handed me my carry on. Once I had taken it I turned to head for the gate, knowing that if I waited any longer it would make it damn near impossible to go. Just before I was about to go out of sight I turned to look back, seeing Mark watching me sadly. As I waved he blew me a kiss then collected up Amber and turned away towards the exit, leaving me to go and get on the plane.

It seemed to be one of those flights where stuff wanted to go wrong. Two lots of baggage were lost when we reached the other end and one talent was most definitely the worse for wear, having drunk almost constantly on the flight and, from the looks of him, indulging in some other substance as well. Somehow we managed to get him off the plane and safely into the hotel without too much attention being drawn to him but it was most assuredly not one of my better days on the job. That was compounded by the paperwork mountain I had to face and I settled myself to it as soon as I reached my hotel room just to make sure it would all get done on time. It did get done eventually and I was just triple checking through it all when there was a knock on my room door and I jumped up to answer it.

"Hey... problem?"

Dave shook his head and held up a six-pack. "Not really, no. I just... didn't get to talk to you much on the flight... or in the airport... or when we got to the hotel..." He let his meaning trail off with the words.

I snorted and smiled a little as I stepped back to let him in. "Yeah, I'm a workaholic..."

"Is that it then?" Nudging the door shut behind him he dropped the beer down on the table.

"What else would it be?" I asked, shuffling the paperwork into a pile so I didn't lose any of it.

Shrugging, he popped two beers off the little plastic rings before tossing one to me and dropping into a chair. "I had the thought that maybe Mark told you not to talk to me, or you just didn't want to."

"Mark wouldn't tell me not to talk to you. He may not like it but he's not going to try and stop me. As for not wanting to... that's never been the case. I just..." Sighing I opened the beer and took a drink. "Today was really tough on me."

Dave nodded. "I know... I should've known but... we haven't talked, really talked in so long..."

I dropped to sit on the edge of the bed. "Not since the basement."

"And I wouldn't call that talking..."

I grimaced. "No, that was a pretty fucked up time."

"I've been worried about you. Really worried."

Surprised I glanced up at him. "Why? I'm off the drugs, don't drink anything stronger than beer... I'm doing pretty good."

"There's always a chance Jade... and after what I saw of Mark... what he's capable of." He blew out a deep breath. "Not that I think for a second that he'd ever hurt you but seeing it with my own eyes does tend to leave one leery." Thoughtfully he rubbed at the side of his jaw that Mark had nearly broken in that fight.

Vigorously I shook my head. "He'd never lay a finger on me, Dave. Never. You don't have to worry about that." A heavy sigh escaped me. "He doesn't even get angry with me, although God knows I deserve that at least."

A slightly sad smile appeared on his face. "Good. That was my biggest fear. I thought for sure he'd hold it against you. I've known him a long time and I know damn well how vindictive he's capable of being."

"He's really trying to let it go but it all gets to him from time to time."

Dave looked at me. "Does it get to you?"

"I hate to see what I've done to him. That nearly kills me. The drinking, the drugs... that was all bad enough but I nearly broke him and I know that, I live with that every day."

"I sure didn't help any. I lost a good friend. I kept one too, I hope."

I smiled a little at him, trying to reassure him. "You kept me as one. It may not have seemed much like it but I still regard you as my friend."

Dave took a long drink from his beer and leaned forward to look at me. "You've always been my friend, Jade. I missed you. When you came back before, I was sure we'd be able to work it out but Glen kept you on a pretty tight leash." He sighed. "I was afraid it was too late now."

I nodded slowly. "Glen's been looking out for Mark. But it's not too late, I promise."

He finally seemed to relax somewhat. "Thank God... After what we... Well, you know. I was so afraid it would be weird."

Drinking deep I drained my beer. "It's strange - it's like I'm almost not connected to the person that did all of those things any more. It still jumps up and bites me in the ass from time to time though."

Dave chuckled. "So you're you again then?" He smirked over at me a little.

An answering chuckle came from me. "I think I am finally, yes."

He grinned wider and drained his beer before setting the empty can aside. "Good." Standing quickly he ploughed me over onto the bed before wriggling around to get comfortable and reaching for the TV remote. "Then I've got my best friend back." Patting the pillow next to him he started to flip through the channels.

Laughing, I shook my head and moved to sit beside him. "What crap are you going to make me watch then?"

He stopped on the preview channel and looked over at me questioningly. "Uh... The Sopranos is on."

"Go on then... I could do with a nap anyway..."

Dave rolled his eyes and went back to channel hopping. "Fine, no Sopranos. You just go ahead and yell when something catches your eye."

"Oohhh... CSI..."

He grimaced but stopped anyway. "You like this?"

Embarrassed suddenly I ducked my head. "I like Gary Sinise."

He gave me a very weird look. "The legless guy from Forrest Gump? "You are a weird little person, Jade." Setting the remote to one side he started watching. "What the hell are they doing?"

Indignantly I jabbed him in the ribs. "I am not weird. I just spend a lot of time with meatheads," I laughed. "They are gathering trace evidence."

"As one of the meatheads you hang out with I can say this with a fair amount of certainty. You're weird." He squinted at the screen. "Looks like they're rubbing tape on a dead body to me."

Again I rolled my eyes at him. "That's how they gather the evidence. It sticks to the tape."

"Yes... because dandruff is evidence..."

"It's skin cells, so yes it is... Not that you'd know about dandruff Mr metrosexual..." I chuckled.

Dave gave a horrified gasp. "Metrosexual! I should so beat you up for that!"

"It's an accurate description."

"I am not a metrosexual. I don't go for manicures or pedicures or facials. I don't pay some crazy woman to rip my eyebrows off my face. I just have good taste is all."

"And more skin products in your luggage than I own in total..."

His mouth snapped until he seemed to work it out in his head. "I'm Greek, we get... blotchy if we're not careful."

I had to fight a grin. "Good cover... Still, it seems to work for you by the number of women trying to throw themselves at you."

"I can't help it they've got good taste too."

"I see the ego hasn't shrunk any..."

He smiled good naturedly. "Absolutely not."

Curiously I looked up at him. "Anyone on the horizon?"

Dave blew out a deep breath. "Well, there is one woman in wardrobe. I sort of got close to her when Glen was dragging you all over. She's...nice. I don't know about dating though."

Softly I patted him on the arm. "Maybe you should try it. Get back out there."

He shrugged. "I don't know if I've got it in me right now..."

"Still sore over the divorce?"

He thought it over briefly before answering. "A little I guess. It's just that I don't have the time. With this program coming up with Mark and all the build up and the appearances and photo shoots, it's not fair to anyone."

"So caught up in the job you don't have time for a life... But if there's this woman in the company she'll be around on the road so it might not be as bad as you think." I shrugged slightly. "Your life though."

Shifting himself a little he looked over at me. "Maybe you could meet her. I'd love your opinion..."

"Want to see if I think she'd keep up with the Animal?" I asked with a cheeky grin.

Dave rolled his eyes and swatted my shoulder. "We already know no one can keep up with the Animal. But if she can put up with Dave there might be a shot."

Smiling I nodded at him. "Of course I'll meet her. Can't have just anyone messing with my boy." Dave chuckled happily and went back to flipping channels, bored with CSI.

The thought of him with another woman caused a twinge of jealousy in me; I'd have been lying to have said anything else. I had Mark and that was really all I needed and more. There was just something about my relationship with Dave however. If Mark hadn't been there? I knew deep in my heart of hearts that if that had been the case I could have fallen in love with Dave very easily and very quickly. I already loved him dearly in my way. I had a sneaking suspicion that his feelings for me also went deeper than either of us dared to admit with all that had gone on in the past. But… it was important to me to see him happy and if this woman could do that? She'd be alright with me if she could keep him smiling.

All in all it was far later than I had planned when I managed to ring home. Mark must have been nearly sitting on the phone as he picked it up on the second ring.

"Jade?"

"Yeah, it's me."

He chuckled and yawned down the line. "I was startin to worry... Get in okay?"

"No problems at all, but the paperwork got me," I chuckled.

"Mmm... you'd think you'd use your first free hours to get some sleep or somethin but you go right back into the paperwork."

"Hey, I'm a workaholic. Everyone knows that."

"Just take it easy over there. You've been out of the game for a little bit. Don't make yourself crazy. That's what I'm here for."

"I'm fine. Just crashed out in front of the TV." It would have served no purpose at all to let him know it had been with Dave. There was no need to make him worry what with me being so far away. I did feel better that things had been brought out in the open between me and Dave. We could finally move on and put that disastrous time behind us, get back to something approximating the friendship we had known in the past. I still regarded him as my best friend out on the road and it felt so good to have him back as that.

Mark's voice dragged me back from my thoughts. "Amber tried to stay up and wait for you to call but she dropped about three hours ago. She misses ya already."

Feeling guilty I sighed. "I'm sorry. I completely lost track of the time."

"The time difference doesn't help either. No problem, beautiful. I'm just glad to hear you're safe. Those transatlantic flights used to give me nightmares."

"I am feeling just how used I am to US time." Chuckling I curled up on the bed with the phone. "Still, it's only for a few days and I think I'm in better shape than some of the guys. They looked fit to drop when we got off the plane."

"I remember..." he chuckled. "I don't envy you darlin."

I laughed outright. "I daren't show weakness either. The cruiserweights are circling like sharks."

Mark also burst out laughing. "Damn that London! He's the ringleader, ya know that right? If you're gonna take em out, start with him and the rest will scatter like cats in a thunderstorm."

"I'd thought as much but now you've confirmed it." My chuckling now had an evil tinge to it. "Armed with that information they're doomed."

"Make sure you tell em where you got that info too. They'll turn into girls in no time."

"And there's the Big Evil we all know and love."

"I ain't retired yet. It's still my yard darlin." A happy rumbling came over the phone.

"I have a sneaking suspicion it always will be in one way or another."

He made a considering noise in his throat. "I may have to show my face once in a while to remind em."

"When the first stars are coming from your school at the very least..."

"My school..." He sighed happily. "I think I do like the sound of that."

"They'd be queuing up to be trained by you and you know it. "It's got to be worth a shot Mark. You know you don't want to leave the business behind altogether."

"No I don't. I want my little girl to see these amazing people I work with... worked with and see that her daddy's not really as big a weirdo as her momma told her."

"I don't think you need to worry about what Sara told her. She adores you completely and utterly, anyone can see that."

He made a contented sound. "Yeah she does. D'you know she goes on more about missin you than she does her mother?"

That made me snort a bit. "That's pretty sad actually. I'm just her daddy's girlfriend."

"Yeah, but she knows you ain't goin anywhere."

"I miss her too. It's altogether too quiet sat here alone in a hotel room." Suddenly I had to stifle a yawn. "I should probably sleep. There are signings way too early tomorrow. "Hopefully I'll be more with it tomorrow and call a bit earlier. If I call right after the show it should work pretty well."

"That'll work nicely. Then the kiddo can say hi too."

"Alright then, I'll do that. I love you." I sighed softly after saying that, feeling the distance acutely all of a sudden.

"Love you too baby girl. Take care of yourself over there."

As we had a show in London I didn't dare go that close to home without driving the sixty miles or so down to see my family. Deciding to leave it as a surprise I simply turned up late one afternoon, parking up and sticking my head in the front door.

"Any welcome for the prodigal daughter?"

Mum's voice floated through from the kitchen. "Jade?" She sounded totally shocked as she poked her head through the door. "OH JADE!" She hurried towards me.

Giving her a huge hug I laughed. "Surprise..."

"Yes! Yes it is!" Holding me away from her she looked at me. "What are you doing here?"

"We're on another European tour and were in London so I couldn't come this close without coming home."

Again she nearly strangled me. "I'm so happy to see you and you're just in time. I'm just cooking dinner."

"Home cooked food that isn't going to burn my throat out? I'm so there..." I laughed.

Mum cocked her head at me. "Aren't you eating well dear?" She pinched at my arm as if checking for malnutrition.

I wriggled away from her prying fingers. "I'm fine, just taking a little while to get used to Mark's cooking. The chilli is, well... rather hot."

Mum wrinkled her nose. "That's no way to eat Jade..." She bustled off towards the kitchen, leaving me to follow in her wake. As soon as I reached the room I was handed a spoon and pointed in the direction of a pot on the stove. "Well, we can't have you getting high and mighty on us now can we?" she chuckled.

"I have a large entourage of men and some women that make sure of that on a pretty much daily basis."

She clucked her tongue. "You'll put them right, I'm sure..." Smiling she leaned in in search of gossip. "Like a big group of teenagers are they?"

I waved my free hand in the air. "That sums them up just about perfectly... especially the cruiserweights. They like to try and wind me up."

"Well dear, it doesn't take much does it?"

Sighing I turned back to my simmering pot. "A little more now than it did. I've grown up some since I was here last time. Amazing I know but true."

Mum couldn't resist hugging me again. "I knew you would..."

"It's not just about me any more or Mark either. He got custody of his daughter and she lives with him now. It changes things a little."

"You're taking care of his daughter too?" She blew out a breath. "There goes my hope for grandchildren." There was an undertone to her voice but I couldn't work out if it was sadness at her last statement or if it was to do with how I had changed since she had last seen me.

"He takes care of his daughter. I just live there when I'm home. She's a great kid though. I adore her already." A warm smile appeared on my face as I talked about Amber.

"And Mark is a good father?"

"I'm not sure I'd have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes but he is an amazing father. There's a lot more to him than I even ever suspected."

She continued with getting the meal ready. "He's not with you?"

I sighed. "Not this time. He has meetings to go to in Connecticut to get ready for his last stint before he retires."

"He really is retiring then?" There was no mistaking the sad tone of her voice in that question.

I smiled slightly. "I know... doesn't really bear thinking about does it? He is though. He can't keep going forever, as much as the fans would like him to."

"Won't be much worth watching for will there?" Chuckling to herself slightly she took over stirring duties.

"Glen will still be around... and Dave of course. There are one or two decent guys coming up but a big chunk of it will be gone, yeah."

"Ah well... such is the nature of life." A buzzer sounded suddenly. "Would you get those rolls out of the oven?" As I went to do as she asked she continued speaking. "You've become quite close to them haven't you?

My head shook slightly as I thought it over. "It's a funny little community I live in now. Of course I love Mark with all my heart, and some of the guys are almost like my family now."

It was Mum's turn to shake her head as she moved to the refrigerator. "I just can't imagine it..."

Her consternation made me laugh out loud. "Yeah, I have some interesting friends... particularly the best one of them."

"You mean Mark dear?" she asked without removing her head from the ice box.

"Mark is the man I share my life with. My best friend on the road is Dave Batista. We make quite a pair."

Mum emerged rapidly, nearly dropping the butter. "Batista! Really?"

I smiled at her reaction. "Yeah. Even last night we were drinking beer and crashed in front of the TV."

Mum laughed to herself. "I just can't imagine it."

My smile turned sadder. "He got me through the tough times with Mark... when there was all the stuff with Sara. He helped pull me out of the hole I got myself into then."

Setting down the items she had taken from the fridge Mum took my hand in a very motherly way. "Nothing could make me happier than to know you've got someone you can depend on so far from home." She kissed me on the cheek.

Touched, I hugged her briefly. "Maybe I should have brought him with me," I grinned.

Mum fanned herself playfully. "Oh yes you should've..."

I burst out laughing helplessly. "Calm down Mum... I think you'd probably jump him if I brought him here."

She looked at me incredulously. "Now that you've taken the Undertaker out of the running what else would you have me do hmmm?" She fought a smile.

"Well, if you put it that way Dave would be the next best option." Smiling I turned to sort through the stuff she had put down.

"Then you'll have to bring him to dinner next time you pop in so unexpectedly."

"Mum, you know I love you but I suspect he'd break you in half."

My mother suddenly came over totally girly, giggling like crazy. "But what a way to go..."

Again I was helpless to fight laughter at her antics. "Oh yeah, I know."

She stopped giggling immediately and looked at me expectantly. "And just what is that supposed to mean?"

Warily I stopped and looked at her. "Just agreeing with you..."

"You just keep to your own behemoth and leave something for the rest of us single women," she commented, swatting my shoulder with a spoon and laughing as she turned back to preparing the abnormally large amount of food.

"What's going on?"

"Oh, didn't I tell you? You've shown up on the perfect evening. Everyone is coming tonight." Smiling happily she went back to fussing.

"The whole UK clan huh?"

Mum nodded. "I did call your brother earlier today though to let him know what he was missing. Someone has to guilt him into bringing my grandchildren to visit though."

"Yeah, I haven't been up there in a while either." Stretching lazily I stole some food. "Ellie took to Mark pretty well when we were there last. She was terrified at first but he brought her round."

"He is quite something isn't he?" As she spoke she got out an armload of plates. "I have to admit, I was quite... leery about this relationship at first Jade..."

"I'll be honest, it's been no picnic but we've come through a hell of a lot and we're still going."

Mum patted my cheek lovingly. "I'm so glad. You've had your share of excitement in regards to your partners. Perhaps this could be the one then?" She smiled at the thought.

"All the while he wants me with him I'll be there."

Suddenly there was an almost giddy look in her eyes. "Does this mean I'll be receiving a plane ticket? For a wedding perhaps?"

Quickly I shook my head even though I was laughing. "That's not on the horizon. Neither of us has really been divorced that long and I'm not sure it's something either of us wants to do again. Amber certainly wants us to though."

I was treated to the vaguely ridiculous sight of my mother pouting. "You should listen to that little girl. It seems to me as if she's very smart."

"You just want to see me respectably married again."

"Is that so wrong for a mother?" Chuckling she turned away as there was a knock at the front door.

"Which member of the family knocks now?"

Her face went slightly pale. "Uh well... none per se..." Uneasily she glanced towards the door then back to me. "Ben is coming..."

A heavy sigh escaped me as I looked at her. "And you chose not to tell me that while I could still escape."

"It slipped my mind! In all the excitement of your showing up, it didn't seem that important." The shrug she gave me did look genuinely sorry as she bustled off towards the door, leaving me leaning against the counter and lighting a cigarette. Mum looked even more pale as she came back into the kitchen.

I looked up, straight into the eyes of my ex-husband. "Ben..."

His eyes widened. "Jade... What are you doing here?"

"We were in London so I dropped down as I was so close."

At that moment a very young looking blonde walked into the room. "Benny, I've just put our coats in the other... Oh... hello."

Mum actually cringed as I looked from the girl to Ben. "Benny?"

Ben glanced around each of us in turn before answering. "Ah Jade, this is my fiancée Jenny."

Nettled by her sudden appearance in my family home I looked back to her. She was almost the complete opposite to me – very delicate looking. "Ah, my replacement..."

Ben winced. "C'mon now Jade. It's not like that. And even if it was, it's not like you don't have your own bit waiting in the States."

I snorted at his tone. "He's a little more than a 'bit' Ben."

"You know what I mean..."

Jenny tried to force a smile, clearly feeling the tension. "I've heard so much about you." Politely she held out a hand to me.

Plastering on a smile I grasped her hand and shook it as if she was one of the guys, feeling her wince just a little at my grip. "Not much of it good I suspect."

Her smile faltered slightly. "Not as much as you'd think."

Ben ushered her away from me a little nervously. "Don't be like this... please. We just came to have a nice evening with your wonderful mother."

Sighing I nodded slowly. "Alright, I'll behave." Deciding to try and be civil I looked to Jenny again as I remembered a phone call from Ben the last time I'd been in England. "So... when are you guys getting married?"

She jumped as I spoke to her and leaned on Ben, wrapping both of her arms around his. "Benny wants to wait until I've graduated University. From then, it's anybody's guess. Isn't that right Benny?" He simply cleared his throat and nodded.

"Well yeah, you want to finish university first..." She was sounding younger by the minute.

"We just want to make sure we've got all our ducks in a row." Ben sounded as if he was trying to convince himself as much as anyone.

"Of course... getting married is a big step, especially when you've been there before and it went wrong."

Mum inserted herself between us and shoved a handful of plates at me. "Could you be a dear and set the table for me?"

Ben followed me as I went to do as I was told, leaning himself in the doorway as I slammed the plates on the tabletop. "We can be civil about this can't we?"

Heaving a heavy sigh I turned to face him. "Look, you being here was sprung on me just as much as I was you."

"So it's nobody's fault... right?"

I thought about it and then nodded my agreement. "Right..." Glancing towards the kitchen I voiced my thoughts. "She's very young Ben."

He shrugged. "She loves me."

Slightly incredulous I leaned against the table. "She loves you? Aren't you supposed to be telling me you love her?"

"Oh I do but she... really loves me." Coming fully into the room he started to deal with the silverware as I placed plates. "Speaking of... where is Mark anyway?"

"Back in Houston. He's not on this tour."

Nodding he continued working for a while. "Stop it Jade. I know your mind is coming up with all sorts of twisted scenarios as to how Jenny and I met." He looked pointedly at me. "I assure you, none of it is what you think."

I shook my head briskly at him. "It's your business not mine. I have enough going on not to have to worry about how the two of you met."

Just then Jenny came in with a basket of rolls. "Playing nice I hope?" Her eyes sparkled as she looked at Ben.

"Yeah, we're good in here. Ben was just asking where my man is."

"Oh Jade! I'm sorry. I'm sure someone will come along. Benny's told me what a wonderful person you are." She patted me on the shoulder.

A snort of laughter greeted her words. "Not at all, he's back home in Houston at his place."

Clearly confused she stopped, thinking. "Oh... well then." She turned to Ben. "I thought you said she was still on her own."

His face went red. "You must have misunderstood me darling..."

"No, I live with someone." Digging in my pocket I grabbed my phone and checked for messages out of habit. "You know, I worry when they leave me in peace for this long."

"Your Neanderthals?" Ben asked.

My eyes rolled and I looked at Jenny. "He has a very low opinion of my charges. Not into wrestling at all are you?"

Ben's head dropped as Jenny replied. "Wrestling? Yes! I am actually why?"

"Did he tell you I'm a road agent for the WWE?"

"NO! He didn't! How exciting! You'll have to tell me all the backstage gossip..." She laughed happily.

Her expression made me laugh with her. "If you have any questions ask away and I'll tell you what I know. Who are your favourites?" I couldn't help grinning at Ben.

Jenny sidled over to me and leaned in to whisper conspiratorially. "Benny hates it but I do have a thing for Batista."

I had to chuckle. "Yeah, Dave is one of a kind."

Playfully she swooned and giggled. "Yes he is." Ben pointedly ignored us as she glanced over at him. "I never was much of a fan of the Undertaker though." Exaggeratedly she shuddered. "When I was young he positively scared me."

I bit my lip hard. "Oh... he's not so bad. His bark is worse than his bite mostly." It was a real struggle not to laugh.

Ben decided to join in the conversation. "Jade, isn't that who you've taken up with?"

Jenny's mouth fell open in a little 'o'. "NO! How could you? He's so..."

"Cro-Magnon?" Ben interjected.

"If we could not rip holes in the man I live with I'd appreciate it," I retorted.

"Sorry... uncalled for..."

I nodded to Ben to show him he was forgiven for that one. "Mark is... just Mark. And when you see him with his daughter you almost forget about Taker."

Jenny shook her head slightly. "I just can't picture it. The man on my TV couldn't possibly have children..." Giggling she rushed back towards the kitchen.

"So very very young..." I observed.

"She's twenty-three Jade. She's not that young."

"And you're thirty-four."

"And how old is Mark?" he asked, folding his arms and leaning against the wall.

"Yes, he's ten years older than me but it makes a little less difference at thirty."

Ben shrugged. "Which would you rather be Jade, the pot or the kettle?"

Sighing I echoed his pose, crossing my own arms. "Look... if she makes you happy that's great."

"And she does," he stated flatly.

"Then that's all that matters."

"And Mark makes you happy too so we shouldn't even be having this conversation."

"I agree." A sudden quiet chuckle came from my throat. "I guess it's force of habit."

"So you're often called into account for your relationship?" he asked, part curious and part still defensive.

Another sigh burst from me. "I've been through a tough time recently. It makes me a little defensive."

Ben echoed my sigh and his eyes softened. "I'm sorry... Care to talk about it? I know we aren't as close as we once were but I'd like to think there's still a way for us to be friends."

I took a deep breath. "I did a few things I'm ashamed of and I need to get past them now. It's left a few problems but I'm hoping they're going to come good."

He set down a stack of napkins on the table and walked over to squeeze my shoulder. "You're an amazing woman Jade... if anyone can come through it, it's you." His head dropped slightly and he headed back for the kitchen.

Wanting to be alone for a few minutes I finished the table and dropped into a chair, thinking. Suddenly it felt as if a chapter of my life was finally dealt with and completed.


	39. Chapter 39

It felt like one of the worst nights of my life. I had known for such a long time it was coming but it still didn't make it any easier to stand there and watch. Finally I dragged my eyes away from the monitor and stared at the ceiling, biting my lip as I fought back tears.

Glen draped an arm around my shoulders and squeezed my gently. "Remember kiddo, he wants this."

Glad of the comfort I leant in to his side. "I know, I know... It's like the end of an era though."

He nodded. "It is the end of an era." The crowd noise stepped up suddenly and I cleared my throat roughly. Glen squeezed me again and peeked through the curtain. "Come here, you've gotta see this..." Sighing heavily I looked through next to him as he pointed towards the ring where Mark was breaking kayfabe, silently thanking everyone.

Almost stunned I shook my head. "There's a first..."

Glen chuckled slightly. "I've only seen him break kayfabe once and that was the last time he, Paul, and I were in the ring together."

Wrenching my eyes from Mark I looked around the crowd. "Some of them don't believe it."

"If I didn't know what was going on, I wouldn't either." His bald head shook from side to side. "Everything's gonna change now. You know that right?"

Having seen enough I stepped back from the curtain. "I know... he's not going to be here any more."

Glen stayed where he was, watching his friend take his final bows. "Oh, I have a feeling he'll be back. Even if he's not in front of the curtain."

Finally a slight smile crossed my face. "Well, if he'd listen to me he might just have a reason to come back."

Curiously he cocked his head. "What do you mean?"

"I told him he should open a school."

His eyebrows rose sharply. "That's perfect. Jade, that's the best idea I've ever heard for him."

"He got excited when I first mentioned it but he's been having second thoughts. It is perfect for him though."

Glen nodded. "He's talked about it before in passing. About what he'd do when he couldn't do this anymore. He'll never let the business go."

I held my hands out, acknowledging that we were making the same point. "Exactly. And you know he'd never be short of people wanting him to train them."

Glen chuckled a bit as he turned back to the curtain, watching the fans as they seemed very reluctant to let Mark go, almost as if it was finally filtering through to them that this was it. "I'd send my kid to him." He glanced back at me. "If anyone could make a worthwhile diva out of her, it'd be him."

The thought made me grin. "A worthwhile diva? That'd make a nice change from most of them."

"Wouldn't it though?" he laughed.

The brief moment of laughter was welcome but it was never going to last and I swallowed a little as I turned back to the curtain. "You know, I've lost count of how many times I've waited here for him and this is the last."

"Yep, me too." Sighing, he swallowed hard. "We've helped each other through this curtain so many times.

Turning to him I threw my arms around him and hugged him hard. "This is shit, isn't it?"

The big man hugged me back. "Yeah, it really is. He could keep going but it's his choice. He's got you and Amber and that's what he wants." Moving me away he held me out to look at me. "He told me..." Smiling when I just stood there blinking at him he continued. "Don't look so surprised..."

Taking a deep breath I forced a smile. "I just have to remember that he'll be there every time I go home."

"Yep... he'll be there, goin through your stuff, rearranging the furniture, pissing you off," he laughed.

I echoed his mirth quietly. "Yeah... but I wouldn't have him any other way." Again he hugged me tightly and we stayed like that until Mark came through the curtain wiping at his eyes.

"Damn that's hard..."

At the sound of his voice I turned to look at him, biting my lip once more. "Bad enough back here. I can't even begin to imagine what it was like for you."

Mark took a deep breath and pulled me in close. "I don't know how I got back here with out cryin."

My arms wrapped tightly around him. "Taker doesn't cry..."

"No, but Mark does..." he chuckled ruefully.

Glen patted him on the shoulder. "You gonna be alright bro?" Mark nodded and we both shifted to include him in the hug. After a moment Mark moved so he could grip onto Glen's arm.

"Thank you... for everything man..."

"Jesus Mark, you act like we'll never see each other again. You forget, I know where you live." Laughing, he hugged Mark again.

Clearing my throat I moved back a little. "I have a couple of things I need to finish off."

Reaching over Mark caught hold of my wrist. "Don't go too far okay?"

I smiled but it was a little wan. "I'll just be in the office and then I'll come find you." He nodded and gave me a sweaty kiss before I turned and headed for the office. There were a couple of things that I had to do but a large part of it was that I wanted some space, a little time to get my head around the fact that it was happening – essentially had happened. Stuck deep in my own thoughts I jumped a little when there was a knock on the door. "Come in."

Mark poked his head round the door, his eyes red. "Looks like there's a goin away party in catering."

Turning my own red rimmed eyes down to the desk I shuffled the papers together, blinking hard. "I'll be right there."

Seeing the blinking he came fully inside. "Don't be sad. This was my decision."

"I know. It's just going to take some getting used to."

Still in his ring gear he dropped into the chair the other side of the desk and pulled the paperwork out of my hands. "Put this stuff away and come make it easier for me to keep my head while everybody tells me how great I am."

Sighing softly I smiled over at him, taking my work back and tucking it away in a file. "Okay, I'm all yours."

"I've just gotta change before I get hijacked. You comin?"

My head lifted suddenly as an idea occurred to me. "D'you mind if I don't? There's something I need to talk to someone about. It can wait if you want though."

He shook his head. "Meet me in my locker room okay?"

"I'll be as quick as I can."

"Kay..." Standing up he leant over the desk and kissed me hard before heading to the door to go get showered. "Love you..." As soon as he was out of sight I darted down the hallway into catering, looking to see if Glen was there yet.

He walked up behind me. "What'd you do with him?

I spun on my heels to face him. "He's in the shower. I have to go find him in a minute but I wanted a quick word with you."

Glen folded his arms. "What's up?"

"I wanted to ask you for some help with something..."

He nodded. "If I can, you know I will."

"I need some advice…"

My business with Glen was quickly concluded and I went to Mark's locker room to see if he was ready. He came out of the shower with a towel wrapped around his waist just as I walked in.

"That was quick."

"I said I'd be as quick as I could."

Leaning down he kissed me softly. "Just glad you're here."

I leaned my forehead into his neck. "They're waiting on you you know."

Breathing deep he sighed. "I know... I'm just not in a hurry to walk out that door."

Gently I rubbed his arm. "I know... It's not easy." Slowly he looked around the empty locker room before kissing my forehead and heading to his bag, leaving me to perch on a bench as I watched him. "Just think of Amber. That's got to help, right?"

Mark nodded as he pulled a t-shirt over his head. "And you..."

I smiled a little at that. "I'm yours wherever I am."

He patted the Harley Davidson logo on his chest and grinned. "C'mon, let's go piss Vince off with my dress code."

Bursting out laughing I stood and walked over to take hold of his hand. "I think you'll get away with it."

"Not like he can fire me," he chuckled.

With a grin I shook my head and turned towards the door. "Not like it ever stopped you much when he could have done. Time to go get the ego massaging of your life..."

Pretty much as I had suspected he was surrounded by people as soon as we walked in the door. Even as I talked to most of the people there I stuck close to his side, always close enough to reach out and touch him and I turned to check on him often. As the party wore on he seemed to be getting more and more distracted but I just put it down to the emotion of the day and the fact that even though he said this was his choice he didn't really want to leave.

Eventually it got bad enough that I turned to him. "You okay?"

He nodded slightly. "Yeah... why?"

"You're zoning out on us."

"Just thinkin is all..." he replied.

"Sure?" I asked, looking up at him intently.

Nodding again he turned to get a goodbye hug from one of the Divas. "I'm good... swear." Finally relaxing I turned away to talk to someone else. Vaguely I heard Mark mutter something to himself and then I jerked in surprise as he grabbed me and yanked me to him.

"What is it?"

He stared hard into my eyes for what seemed like an endless moment before dropping down hard onto one knee. "I've been thinkin... a lot."

Confused I frowned at him until suddenly I realised where he was and the shock clearly showed on my face. "Mark... What are you..."

Brusquely he shook his head to shut me up. "Marry me."

A huge breath left me as if I'd been kicked in the gut. "What did you say?"

"I don't wanna go back to Texas without knowin you're mine forever." He glanced away as of to take stock of what he was saying. "I don't want there to be any misunderstanding..." Quickly he looked back up. "...about how I feel about you." Lifting my hand up where it rested in his he kissed it. "Jade, marry me."

My head tipped back to look at the ceiling for a second before I swallowed and took a quick glance round at the enraptured onlookers. Finally I looked back at him, staring intently until I nodded, a little smile tugging at the corners of my mouth. "Yes..."

Mark goggled at me for a moment. "You will?"

My smile widened. "Of course I will." Mark got quickly to his feet and virtually crushed me to him as the crowd around us cheered loudly. Once that started I came over all embarrassed and hid "You can't do anything quietly, can you?"

"I didn't put much thought to timing..." Laughing with me he kissed me hard, making me forget entirely about the audience as I returned it fiercely. "God I love you..."

"I love you too." A huge grin suddenly appeared on my face. "Amber is going to love this."

He nodded his agreement. "She told me I better not come home without a new mommy for her."

"Damn that kid is perceptive!" I laughed.

Glen walked over, a massive grin on his face and slapped Mark on the shoulder. "You're a sneaky bastard aren't you? Did you even plan that?"

Mark shook his head. "It just had to be done..."

"You just did that on the spur of the moment?" I asked incredulously.

"I don't even have a ring..."

It was my turn to shake my head. "I don't care about a ring."

"Well you're gettin one. Soon as you're back in Texas."

"Mark..."

Mark rounded on the person that had spoken his name. "Dave..."

Dave took a deep breath and held out his hand. "Congratulations..." He glanced at me. "You two are perfect together."

I smiled from where I had been looking on nervously and nodded to him. "Thanks Dave."

Mark looked at Dave's outstretched hand for a moment longer before taking it. "Yeah, thanks Dave..." He thought for a moment before continuing. "Water under the bridge and all that right?"

A tentative smile broke out on Dave's face. "Yeah, definitely. Thank you for all the advice over the years. It won't be the same without you around."

Mark nodded. "So it's all done... all of it." He looked at me as I relaxed noticeably. "Keep an eye on my fiancée..."

Dave grinned wider. "You know I will..." Mark looked at him for a moment longer then nodded resolutely and hugged Dave as well, leaving me to stand watching them, fighting back the tears.

As always with Mark once something was decided as going to happen it happened quickly. The wedding didn't come as soon as he wanted it however and it was three months later that I was to be found pacing up and down in a room in our house, twitching from time to time at the dress I wore.

Glen leant against the window and watched me. "You're gonna pass out or something." Chuckling he fidgeted with his tux.

I looked over at him and grinned. "Like you can talk..." A sudden sigh escaped me. "I'm terrified Glen."

He echoed my sigh and pointedly stopped fidgeting before walking over to me. "Jade, this is just the rite of passage. From here, you've got a hell of a life waiting."

Nodding slowly I smiled up at him. "It's going to be an adventure..."

Glen laughed again. "With Mark everything is." He glanced down at his watch. "Almost time."

Nervously I took a couple of deep breaths and nodded. "You'd better get out there."

The big man who had become my friend shook his head and grinned. "Not until you're okay. Tell me what's up."

"Just nerves, that's all. I've never done the whole big wedding thing before."

"Never would've picked Mark for the type would you?" Smiling he softly played with my hair, all swept up and elegant.

I had to chuckle as a strand tickled my neck. "All this is strange too. Not exactly my normal styling."

Glen stepped back to look at me. "You're beautiful. You have nothing to be scared about."

I nodded again. "I know... Now you really had better get out there."

He also nodded and kissed me gently on the forehead. "Knock him dead Jade."

Taking yet another big breath I hugged him quickly. "Thanks Glen."

"Nothin to it." Winking at me he slid out of the door. Once he had gone I glanced in the mirror for a final time and went in search of my errant big brother.

He met me halfway down the hall and started to usher me back the way I had come. "Whoa there... Mark's right through that doorway."

My eyes rolled as I went where he went me. "That would have been a good start."

Andy laughed. "We've been trying to keep him distracted long enough not to come looking for you. "The suspense is killing him."

"Patience is not one of his strengths."

"Not yours either," he smiled. "Anyway... were you looking for something? You came stalking down that hall with a purpose."

"I was looking for you. You are supposed to be giving me away after all."

His smile broadened as he offered me his arm. "Yes I am. You know, mum's none too thrilled with this arrangement."

"What's she annoyed with?"

"In the absence of Dad, she was sure you'd have her do it."

"It's the one thing I'm old fashioned about. The senior male in the family does the giving away." I sighed suddenly, fidgeting restlessly. "I just want to get on with it now." As I thought back over what I had just said I snorted. "That sounds bad but you know what I mean."

Andy stopped and smiled at me. "Don't worry... out there is the man of your dreams. And let me tell you, he's very anxious to get on with it himself."

Dropping my head I had to laugh a little. "He's worse at the patience thing than I am."

He moved us on until we were standing just to the side of the door that led to where the ceremony was taking place. "We'll find out won't we?" Grinning he kissed me on the cheek. "I'm happy for you Jade. I wasn't this happy for you with Ben. This is right."

"I know it's right. He is everything that I want or need." I was puzzled as Andy burst out laughing. "What?"

Getting himself under some kind of control my brother straightened himself up again. "Would you be shocked to know that he said nearly exactly the same thing about ten minutes ago?"

I had to chuckle myself, despite the rising nerves. "Actually, no... He tells me that himself."

He went to speak but just as he opened his mouth the wedding march sounded. "This is it."

My eyes closed briefly as I took a final deep breath then opened them again and nodded. "I'm ready."

Andy squeezed my hand where it rested on his arm. "Remember, start on the right foot."

I rolled my eyes at him. "I remember."

His eyebrow arched upwards. "Then get to it." Grinning at his tone I started off down the aisle.

Mark was watching from the other end of the aisle, looking as if he was holding his breath. Our eyes locked immediately and neither one of us moved them for the entire time it took for me to close the gap between us, a small smile coming over my face as I reached him. Suddenly, being there next to him, all of my nervousness disappeared.

Andy lifted my hand from his arm and passed it over to Mark. "You take good care of her..."

Mark's eyes never left me as he replied. "You know I will." I smiled in Andy's direction but it was impossible to wrench my eyes away from that green stare.

The rest of the day was almost a blur. There was an abiding memory afterwards of a lot of laughter, not least as Amber at the end of the ceremony standing and staying saying loudly "At last!" Wherever I went, Mark was never far away and, even when talking to other people, we were generally watching each other. The intensity in his eyes made me shiver, especially when I remembered that we were heading off that night for a two week honeymoon.

We'd never before had that length of time alone together without there being some other issue to deal with. In those days we loved a lot and laughed a lot, just enjoying the total freedom to be together for a while. It didn't seem like long before we pulled back up outside the house, back to the real world again.

"Home sweet home." Mark squeezed my thigh as he spoke.

I dropped my hand onto his. "Yeah, here we are. It does feel a little different you know."

He looked over, smiling. "Does it?"

A flash of light caught my eye and I nodded as I glanced down at my ring. "Yes, it does."

Still smiling he leaned over to kiss me. "That's because it's our house now..." Again he kissed me. "Legally on top of all of it, Mrs. Calaway."

"Yeah, I'm still not used to that," I chuckled.

"Get used to it." Grinning, he ran his fingers through my hair. "It's my new favourite thing to say."

Sighing I tilted my head into his hand. "Oh, I like hearing it."

As we got out of the truck the front door flew open and Amber came barrelling out, throwing herself at me. "JADE!"

Katharine appeared as I swept Amber up for a huge hug. "She's been waiting and waiting for that truck to pull up."

"Hey there sweet pea." Coming up behind us Mark smiled and kissed Amber on the head. "I missed you." Amber locked one arm around my neck and leaned way over to hug him as well, forcing me to lean right over as well to avoid being throttled.

"Hey... we're not going anywhere you know," I laughed.

Mark laughed as well. "That's right. You win kiddo."

Hugging her once more I attempted to put her down. "How about you let us get in the house now?" She grumbled but let herself be put on the ground as Mark went to kiss his mother on the cheek.

"Hey Momma. Thanks for takin her."

"Oh you know I don't mind. My baby went and got married. It's the least I could do." Leaning way up she kissed him.

"You know I'll look after him," I said, stepping forward for my turn.

"That I do..." she replied, hugging me tight. "Well, I'll get on my way. I'm sure you two don't need a parent-type hanging around. Oh Jade, there's a message for you on the hall table."

I smiled and hugged her again. "Well... thanks for everything." Leaving Mark to walk her to her car I bounded inside to read my message. It looked highly cryptic, just containing the two words 'It's ready'. Jumping as Amber bounded in dragging Mark behind her I tucked the paper in my pocket.

"What's the message?" Mark asked as soon as he was inside.

"I have something to show you."

Raising his eyebrows suggestively he smirked. "After kiddo goes to bed..."

Mocking exasperation I rolled my eyes. "Not that. Something else."

"It was worth a try..." he sighed.

A grin spread over my face. "But it's pretty likely none the less. No... we have to go back out."

His shoulders dropped as he looked at me. "We just got in."

Quickly I strode over to him to kiss his cheek. "This is worth it, I promise."

"How can I say no to that?" he chuckled, then turned to Amber. "Go get your shoes sweet pea." As his attention was on her I slipped into the next room and dug in the back of a drawer, finding what I was looking for and putting it into my pocket next to the message just as Mark poked his head in the door. "Thought we were leavin."

"Yeah... I'm ready."

"Amber's already bouncing around the truck..."

"Well then, let's go." Grinning broadly I headed back out and jumped into the truck again, looking back to see Mark following, shaking his head in confusion as to what the hell was going on.

Climbing into the driver's seat he cast an eye back to make sure that Amber was buckled in then turned a sceptical eye on me. "You gonna tell me what this is about?"

"Nope. You'll have to wait and see."

"Then give me directions woman..." I did as he told me, grinning the whole time and it only got wider as he drove along, glancing over at me nervously from time to time.

Eventually I burst out laughing. "What?"

"Pardon me for bein a little leery..."

Pulling a face I turned towards him. "Just what do you think I'm going to do?"

"I have no idea..." he admitted.

Another chuckle worked its way out of me. "Just drive man." Despite the eye rolling he did as he was told. After a short while I sat up straighter. "Alright... take a left here and park up." Giving me a questioning look he turned in to park. As soon as the truck stopped I jumped out and waited impatiently for them, jumping slightly from foot to foot.

Mark lifted Amber out and then came around the truck, looking dubiously at the building in front of us. "An empty building... you shouldn't have..."

Retrieving the key that I had stashed in my pocket earlier I pulled a face at him and headed for the door. "C'mon."

He followed behind me. "What's goin on Jade?"

Unlocking the door I turned to him. "Just trust me." Opening the door I waved him in to the dark interior, watching him walk slowly inside. Once he was fully in there I walked over to where I knew the light switches were. "Consider this... a wedding gift from me." With that I flipped the switch and flooded the building with light.

Mark stood stunned, his mouth hanging slightly open as he stared at the ring standing ready in the centre of the room. "Jade... what the..."

"It's your school."

He blinked a couple of times then turned to me. "My... school..."

"All here and ready to go."

Mark watched Amber scamper up on to the apron and laughed. "This is mine..." He looked a question at me and ran a finger over some of the framed pictures of his career that hung on the wall.

I smiled as I watched him looking around at everything. "Yes, it's yours."

Stepping backwards he let his eyes roam around the whole scene before him and barked out a disbelieving laugh. "How did you do this?"

"Oh, I had a lot of help."

"Write a list, I'm gonna have to send out thank you cards." He touched the wall, looking almost a bit giddy.

"A lot of it is down to Glen."

"Should've known..." Dropping his hand he wandered to the ring, climbing onto the apron and then through the ropes.

Following behind him I leant on the apron. "He agreed it would be a great idea for you."

Mark leant against the turnbuckle and watched Amber bouncing around the ring, laughing. "I wasn't sure I was gonna do this..."

Sighing I looked up at him. "I don't want to push you into it but it seems so perfect." Not replying he jumped up suddenly and scooped Amber up to hold her upside down for a tombstone set up. Looking over at me he winked and performed the slowest tombstone ever before covering Amber. Chuckling hard I slapped the apron three times for the count.

"No fair! You cheated!" Squirming out from underneath him she huffed and kicked him in the arm. Mark fell over on his back, laughing and rubbing his shoulder.

I had to laugh with him. "Yep, she could be a diva."

Mark sat up Deadman style and looked over at me. "No way..."

My eyebrows rose. "She's not going to follow you into the business then?"

"Not if I can help it." Snaking out a hand he grabbed Amber and pulled her into his lap. "You don't wanna be a wrestler do ya sweet pea?"

"YES!" She wriggled until she was free and bounced in a circle around him. "I'm gonna be just like you when I grow up!"

"I'm doomed," I laughed.

Mark shook his head as Amber continued to bounce and looked around, still very much awestruck at what I was showing him. "This is... Jade, I can't even come up with the words."

I shrugged very slightly. "It just seemed like a good idea and you know me once I get an idea in my head."

Hoisting himself to his feet and leaned on the ropes above me and held out a hand. "C'mon up..." I grabbed his hand and scrambled up, climbing through the ropes when he held them open for me. Taking me by the hands he pulled me into the centre of the ring then again stood there looking around. "It's perfect. It's better than I ever could've done myself."

"I owe Glen a lot of beer."

Mark laughed as he spotted a door at the back of the room. "Where's that go?"

"That's the office."

He grinned down at me. "I have an office?" I nodded. "Well let's go see my office then... shall we?" Smiling I ducked back through the ropes and jumped down off the apron, turning to take Amber as Mark handed her down to me and hopped down himself, still looking around like a kid in a candy store. "You guys..."

"Explains the creeping off to make phone calls, huh?" I asked as I put Amber on the floor. "It was a nightmare getting away to check in with progress sometimes."

His eyebrow raised quickly. "That was makin me a little nervous..."

"Well, now you know what is was for."

Mark attempted to look stern but couldn't hold it and broke into a contented grin. "I am never gonna be able to make this one up to you..." Pulling me to him he kissed me softly before taking a good long look at the plaque on the office door reading 'Old Man'.

I spoke quickly on seeing him look at that. "That wasn't me... just so you know..."

He shook his head. "I didn't figure." Turning the knob he opened the door and stepped inside. Once in there he didn't seem able to speak for a moment, just stood there taking in all of the old pictures that lined the walls in there as well. "Me and Paul..." Smiling he touched the frame of a backstage shot of the pair of them before moving on down the line. "Where'd you guys get all these? I don't think Glen had em..." He was almost more talking to himself as he continued. "Did he?"

"You need to thank Paul too... some of these came from him but most Glen sourced for me." Laughing happily he picked Amber up and starting showing her some of the pictures of the purple glove wearing days. Leaning in close I pointed one out. "Look... Daddy in his chubby mullet phase..." Laughing I stepped back in case of any retribution.

Mark glared playfully at me and put Amber down on the desk, sidling around it to try out the big leather chair that sat behind it. "See? Now this I can get used to."

"Just sitting there ordering people around?"

Pushing the chair away from the desk a bit he rolled across the floor and laughed. "I can go yell at em without ever gettin up."

Sighing happily at his playing I propped a hip on the corner of the desk. "There have been some enquiries already."

Mark's head snapped up in surprise. "There have?"

"You know how quick stuff gets round the wrestling community."

He blustered a bit nervously. "Well, I'm gonna need staff... and... another trainer. At LEAST one more trainer..."

"I doubt you'll have much problem finding another trainer. As for staff... that's all in hand."

Mark's eyes narrowed at me. "What do you mean the staff's handled?"

"I mean the admin staff has been sorted out already."

A slight grin came over his face. "And just who have you signed on to take my abuse?"

"Well, she has experience of the business and comes highly recommended. She's also very good at keeping unruly wrestling types in line." A small smile appeared on my face as well.

Mark leant over his forearms on the desk. "Bet she's hot too."

"So she's been told once or twice. Very professional though."

He shuffled through a pile of papers that were sitting in the centre of the desk. "So she wouldn't be up for workin late... alone with the boss..."

"Oh, I don't know... She's very dedicated but also married."

Mark waved off the married comment casually. "I doubt I've gotta worry 'bout her husband any."

"I dunno, he's a big guy," I chuckled.

"I can take him," he stated.

I had to laugh. "It'd be interesting to see you try."

Suddenly his face became serious again. "So you're leavin the company?"

Sighing softly I nodded. It hadn't been the easiest decision to make but I was sure that it was the right one. "Yeah, I am."

Mark lifted himself out of the chair, which was immediately occupied by Amber, and walked around the desk to me. "Just tell me you're not doin it because of me."

"I'm not doing it because of what worries you. I'm doing it because I want to be here, with you and Amber, and to make a success of this place." He opened his mouth to speak but couldn't seem to find the words, kissing me passionately instead. After a few moments I pulled away slightly. "Actually... I left already." A little unsure I glanced up at him to make sure he wasn't annoyed at me doing it without talking it over with him. "I quit back before the wedding."

Mark goggled at me. "You... did?" His head shook slowly from side to side. "No one said a word..."

"They were warned not to. I wanted this to be a total surprise and you would have wondered what was up if you'd heard that I was leaving."

Chuckling quietly he nodded. "Yeah, that would've been a... discussion."

I nodded along with him. "So it was easier this way."

He chuckled and went back to his chair, scooping Amber up and dropping her into his lap as he ruffled through the papers on the desk and looked extremely pleased with himself. An envelope fell out of the pile in front of him. "What's this..."

Craning over to have a look I shrugged. "I have no idea."

Pulling it open he smiled and started to read the contents aloud. "'Old man, congrats on the wedding. Hope you don't mind the red motif but I couldn't let everyone think you could come up with all this on your own. Make it work, bro. I'll come down and torture your trainees whenever I'm in town. Glen.'" Sighing he set it aside. "You guys are amazing you know that?"

I was still smiling at the note from Glen. "We just love you and want you to do something you love."

"I'm totally at a loss..." Laughing he glanced around once more. "I love you so much."

Sighing happily I followed the path of his eyes. "It's been a long journey but here we are. Where we should be and with the people we should be with."

He nodded slowly and hugged Amber tightly and then actually looked properly at all the papers in front of him. "Applications..." Shocked he eyeballed me. "These are ALL applications?"

Smiling warmly I nodded. "They are. I told you they'd be queuing up for you to train them."

Mark fished through them for a moment and then picked up the phone. "No time like the present I guess." Winking at me he started dialling, setting the next chapter of our lives in motion.

* * *

_A/N: So that, as the saying goes, is all folks... the end of Traveller. I didn't put this note at the top as I hate that, it totally destroys the flow for me._

_It's weird to have finished this - I've been writing it for 16 months and it has changed my life to a very large extent by introducing me to a number of people who have become some of my closest friends. However, a tale always has to end sometime and this is the end of the line for the story of Jade and Mark. To those that have stuck with me through this whole thing I say thank you for your encouragement and just for being there. Particular thanks go to my closest friends of all: Dreaming Egypt, NikMick and Bkerbunny. Girls, I have no idea what I'd do without you._

_Jay_


	40. Epilogue

_A/N - It's been a while since I've been here! When I finished up with this tale, quite a few people wanted to know how things worked out for Mark and Jade. I've never lost the love I have for these two together and it has nibbled away at me until I just had to put something down to give a hint of how life went on for them after the main tale ended. I hope you enjoy._

* * *

It felt strange to be back there – almost unbelievably strange. I'd not come even close to losing touch with the friends I had made during my admittedly very short time working for the WWE, and had visited from time to time with Mark when the circus made it to our corner of the country. The visits had tailed off a little as the school got busier. Somehow my role seemed to be even more demanding at times than trotting around the world with my group of primadonnas had ever been. Mark and the training team were the ones the students looked up to. I was the person they came to air their problems to, be it money, personal lives or for a little bit of background on the lifestyle involved in working at the top of the game.

But here we were, back again. It was a very exciting evening for the school, for Mark's career as a trainer. One of his students, one he had very high hopes for, was debuting on RAW. And it gave him a chance to debut someone else. That's right, the unthinkable had happened and our son was being passed around in the back for approval. Well, when anyone could get him away from Glen for more than two minutes at a time. The Big Red Machine turned into a big ol' softy when there was a baby in the vicinity. That fact was true for a lot of the big guys there though.

There was something a little weird about the moment when I turned round to see who had my son and saw him resting comfortably in a pair of very familiar Armani clad arms. I kept in close touch with Dave, spoke to him at least once or twice in the average week. It had taken Mark a long time to settle in his mind how things had played out between me and Dave. He knew that the big man meant the world to me, and I think he even knew what I thought might have happened if he himself hadn't been around. He also knew that I had made my choice however, and that choice was him, the life we had now built together in Houston. As much as it had been a hard, damn hard road to follow the destination had been worth the effort.

Somewhere not far away Amber could be heard holding court. She loved everything about the business, and spent every moment her father could be persuaded to allow her at the school. She was growing and changing so fast now, and was such a happy child with her life since things had settled down. There had been some twinges of jealousy when she realised that the baby I had carried would mean she'd have to share her daddy and me with another child, and a highly amusing conversation where she told me it would be much better if I just stopped him growing and kept him somewhere until she was ready for a brother or sister. Luckily it hadn't been quite as bad as I'd feared once he'd been born. Amber had come to tolerate, and then be fascinated by, the little bundle of temper and fire that Mark and I had produced.

As for me? At the end of stories like this, it's often said 'Oh, I wouldn't change a thing!' I'd never been all that conventional and so there was an awful lot I would have chosen to change. Maybe not from my early life, what I'd come to almost think of as my 'previous' life back in the UK. It was what had happened there that had brought me to the United States, got me into this heady exotic yet earthy world. What had come afterwards was a different story. However, a wise person once told me that in life you should only regret the things you haven't done. Catch 22 – if I removed all the painful things that had happened in the time Mark and I had been together, would it have taken away some of the strength we had as a couple later on?

Whatever – the past was done and over. We'd come through the trials thrown at us and turned the page yet again. I was a traveller no longer.


End file.
